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[555apple]

jules // 20 // lip gallagher but a girl

minors dni

[555apple]

with the weight of the world perpetually on his shoulders and a history of violence behind his tired eyes, jonathan byers had been broken down far too many times to have any hope of being normal.

for the most part, he managed to appear as such; something he was always thankful for, as it left room for his unhinged nature to slip through the cracks on occasion without being noticed, allowing himself to give into his vices. of course, his biggest vice was you.

it started small. prolonged stares, taking mental notes of your schedule, the like. but similar to a frog in boiling water, those little indulgences that he allowed himself to have had devolved into more. you became his favourite hobby, all-consuming.

jonathan was never a thief before, but when it came to you, he was reduced to a magpie. over time, he amassed a collection of little things he’d swipe here and there that he’d keep like trophies. a pencil you’d used, or a hair-tie you left behind somewhere. his favourite find was your lipgloss; the closest he’d get to the taste of your mouth. paired with his ever-growing collection of pictures of you, it was almost like he had you, as much as a freak could.

no matter how many photos he took or items he stole from you, he knew he’d never have you the way he dreams of when he sinks his teeth into his fist at night. not the way steve had you.

steve harrington got everything he wanted. he was everything jonathan hated. but still, he found himself studying steve, constantly observing, trying to understand what it was about him that kept you so captivated. that’s what led him to the bushes behind your house, hidden away and red-hot in the face, listening to steve give you everything he wish he could.

his mind and body, aflame with conflict, were fighting a losing battle. he wished it was him having you, making you feel good, making you come the way steve was. but you sounded so pretty, and part of him liked knowing that you were being taken care of. the envy that filled his body was quickly overcome by the familiar all-consuming lust that you brought out him.

so maybe he took care of it, and maybe he felt like the perverted freak he was, but he’d wear his sickness on his sleeve if it would lead him to places like this, getting to know you like this. he knew he’d be drawn back again and again.

he made a mental note to bring his camera next time.

[555apple]

lip gallagher isn’t a gentle person by any means.

not in how he talks, not in how he works, not in how he conducts himself. but with you? he handles you like you’re fine china that could break from a harsh swipe of a finger.

the level of sensitivity he feels for you- it scares him. he’s lived a life requiring self preservation, having a protective wall up at all times. one look from you, and that wall gets broken down like a hit from a sledgehammer. a defensive man left defenseless.

he fought it at first. tried ignoring you, distracting himself with anything he could find. but you entered his mind over and over again, engrained into his psyche like a parasite. he wanted to hate you for it- but who could hate you?

the first time he kissed you, he held himself back, using a level of softness previously unfathomable to him. with other girls he was typically rough, commanding. but with you? he knew he was undeserving of the saccharine taste of your mouth, and conducted himself as such.

even now, his internal conflict still arises; he’s still terrified his bitter nature will eventually drown out your sweetness, but he can’t stop himself from drowning in you, his own designer drug. with time, he’s learned that you can handle him at his roughest- but even as his course hands press into you, he praises you like you’re an angel on earth, one he’s always undeserving of. one that he is always in disbelief that somehow, he has as his own.

you’ve left a strong man weak.