SadAko

Just a sad person, posting stuff.

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I am not okay

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Someone from my past approached me the other day. I thought we were reconnecting or maybe we were. I just assumed too much about the interaction. It wasn't healthy. I'm not healthy. I thought this time, this time.. it's us. I stalked the person's twt account and found out that there was someone else. I saw a photo of their conversation. "Ang aking sansinukob, Hiraya" (My Universe, The answer to my dreams) was her nickname. Maybe there's nothing going on between them... And I'm just jumping into conclusions? Now idk if I should still meet up with him. Maybe I should and.. idk.. i don't know..

is this person playing with me again?

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I haven't been posting for a while but I bought a vape

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What am I supposed to do now?

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I feel so fucking ugly

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I wanna work but too lazy to meet requirements. I want money tho :<

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Sad-scrolling on facebook for hours until this video which made me cry cjdnfkdb

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Too tired to give a shit

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Self-pity. I'm tired. I'm sad. I wanna drink, get wasted. Make out. I kinda wanna try cigarettes. I feel so shitty. I feel so ugly. I feel so fucked up. I feel so useless. I feel so lost. I feel so heavy. I feel like cutting my hair. I feel like hurting myself.

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I really hate to say this.. so I'm not gon say it anymore. Lol

Bxkxndkdndkdnd changed my mind in a split second

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i fuckin hate myself

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Hello, I hate myself.

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Why can't I love myself? I'm really trying.

I wanna love myself for being emotional

I wanna love myself for being an empath

I wanna love myself for loving animals

I wanna love myself for petting random stay dogs and cats anywhere I see em

I wanna love myself for my cooking

I wanna love myself for being so resourceful and incredibly creative

Trust me I really do. But I can't tell myself shit. I can't tell these things directly to me. I'm resisting. Idk why exactly. I'm trying and I want to. I wanna be proud of who I am. But I just can't.

I once tried to be proud of my passion for music and art and opened about it to a whole class. After telling that shit, I immediately regretted it because I think I'm not even that good. I'm not that creative. I'm not that artistic. And up until now, I still regret saying those things about me. What if they expect? I don't create art and music that often anymore. I haven't got the chance to work on them and improve. I wanna get out of this, really. But I don't know how.

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I am so single, I hate it :< I want someone to cuddle with djkxjr

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My brain's getting worst these days. I can't talk properly. I don't have a direction when I'm trying to talk. Or there are some instances while talking, I forget about what I was wanting to point out. It's really hard. Can anyone help me? I suspect I have adhd btw. I wanna do good in class.

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I keep comparing myself to others and everytime I do, the first thing I think of is competition. However, I'm too lazy to compete which results to frustration. Then, I self-hate.