First day of the new job:
First of all. M texted me this morning and no I’m not kidding.
Me 20 minutes later: yeah
M: oh you over the gym life?
Ignored him because I’m getting ready for work and I have no idea what the fuck he wants or where this is gonna go after 5 1/2 months of silence.
M: either way doesn’t matter, want to do some cardio together?
Me: can’t. Getting ready for work
Excuse me. Excusssssseeeee meeeeeee??? I’m sorry. I didn’t even get a happy birthday from you on my birthday 2 weeks after you suddenly have a girlfriend. And it’s been silence since you got a gf. And you didn’t reach out. Or tell me before you got a gf that you were wanting to get and date OR THAT YOU WERE LIKING SOMEONE.
If you’re wondering why did I even respond. Because I had a big gut feeling that’s how the convo was gonna go. I was curious. That’s it. That’s why.
And I feel nothing. Not annoyed. Not even hurt. I’m more thinking “who the fuck do you think you are!?!”THE FUCK?!?
I knew where I stood months ago. This isn’t a reconfirmation of what I already knew. It’s just…..nothing? Idk. I’m going about my life. I know what I mean to him and I would rather have people in my life that cares and reaches out. Clearly not M. I mean I should have known all these years but I was so not ok over my dad’s suicide and figuring out who M was and…no thanks.
I met way too many people. I am exhausted. I was off at 2:35 when I’m supposed to be off at 3. I’m exhausted. And as for traffic, there was a lot less but in the ONE spot where it’s stupid, it’s still stupid. So I need to just take the exit over the bridge that I’ve been own custom to and just deal with it. It’s not that bad even though there are more lights 😅 but either that or sit in traffic for god knows how long.
Anyways. I have a very small organized understanding of my job. And the building I will be working in that’s shutting down…those people are clearing out and quitting so fast. Can’t blame them. I have guaranteed job security at the hospital and let me tell ya, that place is fucking insanity. I’ll start at the building I’m assigned. Tomorrow is my first official day of learning how to order stuff. I don’t know what else I’m expected to do 🤣😅 but there’s a lot of broken systems because they’re so busy. Broken systems meaning we’re out of stock on something we ordered 2 months ago when we were slowly running out and the person was supposed to contact the rep and ask for and ETA or a product like it. Didn’t happen.
There’s a lot of people half assing their jobs and my supervisor needs some help facilitating that (part of my job).
I am one of them but I am favored because they Hope to promote me in a few months. PROBABLY the supervisory position. Which is fine and dandy but I want a higher job. He knows. And I got the hint that there’s more coming my way and everyone kinda knows this bitch ain’t one of us but she’s gonna help him facilitate some order around here.
My lunch stayed in my car and therefore is completely ruined and I’m actually VERY unhappy about it. There wasn’t a proper time to go back to my car and get it. He bought me lunch because he knew. Appreciated.
I get my own office in my location. When I move to the hospital he isn’t sure where I will go as every stinking office is taken and he’s not too sure he wants me where everyone else is. That’s a problem for him and higher to work on. The talk is they will close in November instead of January due to so many staff quitting.
I’m fucking exhausted. I’m glad it’s almost 4, but I can’t take my meds til 5:30 earliest.