John B

[ofnotakook]

I can always trust in you

@apogueforlife 

I can always trust in you 

Trust; it had to be earned. Love; it had to be developed. For Sarah she always had her guard up. Each time she’d get close to letting someone in the other shoe would drop, she’d freeze up, and run in the other direction. With each boyfriend she ever had she had the urge to run. To distant herself when she felt like she was trapped. When she felt the pressure to feel more than what she did. Topper he liked the idea of her. He loved the idea of being with her; but he wasn’t in love with her. 

There’s only one boy Sarah loved; and that was John B. It happened unexpectedly. It happened on a day she never saw coming. That day stayed with her. The day we went to chapel hill; the day we had fun dressing each other up. The day we pretended to be our alter egos; Val and Vlad. It was nice to be herself. I didn’t feel the pressure to be perfect. I didn’t feel like my family was watching me, I was myself. I felt safe, I felt like John B saw me despite all the flaws I had. He loved me for me, and I loved him. It was a roller coaster of a relationship if you asked me. We had gone from barely knowing each other; to falling completely utterly in love. I gave up my kook card for him. I knew the obsluces we’d be facing now, the pogue’s vs the kook. But nothing made me question my loyalty to him. To the Pogues. It got messy with my dad; him being the reason Big John was gone. The reason why the gold was taken. The reason I was on the run with John B. The gold felt so close yet so far. We managed to clear John B’s name but that’s because Ward decided in his best interest to fake his own death and act like the hero. The guy that claimed to have been a killer in order to protect his own son. Rafe just the thought of being near him made me sick to my stomach. For a second I was upset, I felt like my whole body ached when I witnessed the boat blow up. When I witnessed my father shatter beyond the sea. And that’s when I saw the truth; what led to us being torn apart; what led to John B and I no longer being together. He had been happy to ward dead; and I couldn’t exactly find the words to blame him. He took everything from him. But at the end of the day; he was my dad. I was hurting and I remembered that look all too well; the look of proudnessI felt like I was seeing another person. I was grieving the dad I once looked up to, to the dad that I was once his princess. I needed John B to hold me, to make me feel like it was always going to be okay. But it suddenly felt like us it wasn’t meant to be.. 

Walking away for yourself; was all you could do. It was hard to be near him; to be pulled back into the adventure; to the cross. But for Pope I’d be there; awkwardness assured. Sarah didn’t know if she should make eye contact with him; or just stay silent. Silence seemed better; until that night; we had a plan to get the cross from Rafe; the big truck was parked outside my house. JJ and Pope were hidden behind the bushes. I was determined to walk inside; to get the key to unlock the truck; how we’d get the heavy cross out was a big ass story of it’s own. But I had made two steps to the gates, one glance backwards; I saw him John B was about to get up; and for a second I found myself hopeful; maybe this was the moment of the unknown. What comes next? Dark hues met for a second and I swore the air was taken out of my lungs; but he didn’t budge, didn’t move. Giving me the indication we had nothing left to say. That was the last memory I had of him; of us staring at each other. 

Head leaned against the gated up windows of my room at the barbados house, The house I was locked into. The boat felt like a nightmare; I was drugged by my own family. Rose had put a drug in my tea. Rafe and had helped her execute the plan; to force me here against my will. I remembered telling Ward when he claimed John B only cared about the treasure about the gold that I was just stuck in the cross hair that he was wrong. That John b would find him and come for him once I went missing. How wrong had I been? I wanted to blink back the tears that dared to fall. I was a pogue at heart; I chose it for John B because I loved him, despite our differences he’d always have a permanent place in my heart. It had been weeks since we left on the boat, I had tried to zone out the conversations of my parents; I had pretended to be sleeping at times, but here once I had been pulled into my room I never left. I guess Ward was afraid I’d run, or threaten to tell the cops his own daughter was kidnapped against her will. Give or take. Sarah swallowed the lump in her throat; it had gotten dark. She smelt the tray of food that her sister left her outside the door. Her bed was an inch away; The light pink covers still in place, it had been a day or two since we arrived, and I had slept in my bed because that meant i was okay, that meant that I was adjusting to being here; in this house. When all I wanted was to break free. At the window, on the seat where my back was pressed against the wall. Head tilted towards the window, I could see the water; any boats that passed by. I was alone; and all I could hope was that the Pogue’s were okay that perhaps my dad was right they managed to get the cross and that’s all that mattered for Pope. Eyes moved to the stars; for a moment it was nice to believe we were looking at the same stars; as if John B was on his way; assuming my dad was lying. For now all I could do was hold hope; I’d find a way out; it was a done deal. 

Tomorrow; I’d work out a plan. The Pogues would have me, if I found him. We’d always have each other. A wistful thought as a hint of a smile tainted onto my lips.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Love. Definitely not something I ever believe really existed. I always saw it more as, in life, people come and go. The ones who matter will stick with you, through thick and thin. For me, that was the Pogues: JJ, Kie, and Pope. I don’t remember a time in my life when those three weren’t part of it, and something tells me, I’ll never shake them either. Not that I’d want to, cause they’re everything to me. Then Sarah Cameron busted into my life unexpectedly… One of those surprising moments where I got myself in a sticky situation, and Sarah Cameron, of all people, was the one who bailed me out of it. Even more surprising though was how I felt when I was with her. It was the first time in my life when I found myself wanting to be with a girl exclusively. In time she even made me rethink my original theory about love. Then, well, I guess you could say life happened, and we broke up. Sure, I knew I played a part in our break up. When her father died, I should have been more supportive of the toll that loss would take on Sarah. Yeah, the guy was bad news… A lying crook, which Sarah obviously knew too, but he was still her father. Given the bad blood I had with Ward, and also the fact that he murdered my father, could you really blame me for being relieved that the guy was finally gone? Right or wrong, it’s how I felt. This leading to the end of Sarah’s and my relationship. Still, in my heart I knew this wasn’t the end for us. A love like ours always finds a way back to one another. Naïve or not, I refused to see it any other way…

Then weeks passed and I was starting to wonder if it really had been the end for us. Mind you, I still wasn’t giving up, but instead of dwelling on what may or may not happen between me and Sarah, instead the Pogues and I focused on getting the cross back for Pope. It actually became a, “Kill two birds with one stone” type of adventure for us though, since word got to me that Sarah had been abducted by her family. Them ultimately boarding a ship with Sarah and the cross, allegedly heading to Barbados; knowing that was exactly where we would be going to. This was it… This was our chance to, not only help Pope get the cross back, but also for me to rescue Sarah too…

Given that us Pogues had made some enemies, and also the fact that we didn’t have so much as a pot to piss in, much less money to travel to Barbados, it took some work, a lot of time, and even more creativity on our parts before we finally reached Barbados. Once we did, I knew we needed to devise a plan to get back both Sarah and the cross. Of course JJ, as usual, came up with one of the worst plans I had ever heard. This saying a lot considering JJ’s had some really shitty plans, over the years. This one pretty much topped the other bad plans he’s had though; prompting all of us to shoot down his plan and come up with another one. Knowing it was either come up with a better plan, or go with JJ’s plan which will likely either get us all killed, or at the very least, we’ll end up locked up in some jail cell. In time we did come up with a new plan. Not a great one, but definitely better than JJ’s plan, so it was something, at least. For our part we decided one step at a time…

We’d wait till night, rescue Sarah first, and then once we had her safely out of that house and away from her deranged family, we’d devise a plan to get the cross back. I mean, it’s not like we could just knock on the front door, and request either. Not without being shot, that is. We couldn’t even break in and steal the cross without getting caught, since it was so damn heavy, it was going to take a hell of a lot of brute strength to carry it, so we’d just deal with that plan later. For now, my focus was on Sarah. Sure, I knew there was a chance I’d be the last person she’d want to see tonight, but given me and the Pogue’s rescuing her, or her remaining a hostage with her own family, I figured I was the lesser of the evils, so to speak. I justified as Kie and Pope remained look outs from the ground; keeping hidden to the garden area where they tried to remain unseen, while JJ and I went to the roof. With JJ’s help, he hoisted me down onto the balcony I had scoped out and learned led to the bedroom they were keeping Sarah locked in. Once I approached the balcony window, I peaked inside discreetly; making sure her family was nowhere in sight before I gave a couple of light taps on the window. My way of alerting Sarah that I was here. Of course the window was pad-locked, which just pissed me off more. How could they do this to Sarah? The Cameron’s definition of family was nothing more than a load of bullshit, if you ask me, because this isn’t how you treat family. I thought in building anger as I used the pin I had with me to trigger the lock. Once I heard it click, my eyes shifted up toward JJ. The thumbs up he gave me in reply assuring me he had cut the security system like he confidently told me he could easily handle. This was JJ, so although I’d trust him with my life, and well, I had a few times, I still held my breath as I slowly and gingerly opened the window; expelling a quiet sigh of relief when an alarm didn’t sound as I opened the window] Val…? [I quietly whispered her code name into the dark bedroom. Hoping it would soften any resentment she might have in seeing me here now] Vlad and the crew are here to spring you from here… [I further whispered into the dark bedroom as I waited for her to come over to the window; knowing we didn’t have long before someone would alert the Cameron’s that the security system had been hacked into, so the sooner we got out of there, the better our chances of getting out of here alive]

[ofnotakook]

The pogue plans never went according to plan. Not that Sarah was going to complain now considering. She was able to escape the bars that locked her into her old bedroom. She was tired of starving herself out of spite. She was tired of laying awake at night in fear that she might be dragged out of bed. She was tired of being forced to live the perfect life. Forced to smile for her parents; the only one in her family she liked was her sister Wheezie, she’s who I wanted to protect. But she had young opinions, didn’t see what our family was capable of. And given how much risk John B went through to find me, I had to go with him. Not that I wanted to stay trapped or that I’d risk his life to save my sister. 

I felt torn with myself now. I escaped; I was on the roof; I had survived the lies, I had survived my own father aiming a gun at me; of course to his unknown knowledge Ward did exceed in his aiming and catching fire on one of us. I doubted his attention was to hurt me. Yet again it felt like a toss up considering, he did try to strangle me to death; and drugged me to get onto that stupid boat. But I knew him to know the problem wasn’t my stubbornness, it was John B and the pogues. He was threatened, and right now the Camerons wasn’t my family; it was the pogues. I had chose them a long time ago weather I wanted to admit it or not. 

Safe; is what I felt; despite the pain that was pooling on my side; the white sweater was making it difficult to hide. But I felt his kiss; the graze of his lips on my head, a tenderness of who we were. A love language for us. Seeing as JJ had followed my lead; and started down the ladder; I had stepped forward turning my back to where my hues fell on the male I loved with all my heart. Despite our differences that did come to light when I uttered the words maybe we weren’t meant to be, to work out. 

A soulfulness in my stare as I uttered my words. “ Promise you’ll come down.” I mouthed the words “ I can’t lose you.” As my palm wasn’t already filled with my own blood. Taking my hand from side, I placed them firmly on the handles of the ladder, with one step and than the next. I caught sight of the droplets of blood hitting the ladder as I climbed down, It wasn’t until I reached the bottom, I felt JJ; place his hand on my hip in order to help me off when he wore this stunned expression. “ Sarah.” He mouthed, I knew he felt it; the blood that now covered his hand; I shook my head. “ Don’t say a word.” I had strength I’d be okay until I couldn’t walk anymore; He was about to say something when I hit him in the chest. 

John B would be in earshot; I couldn’t tell him yet; once we were in the clear I’d tell him, but I didn’t want him to worry about me, not after all the risks he took to save me. Pushing myself to the side, I eyed the small area where our feet hit the grass; Kie and Pope had to make it to the gates; where it led to the waterfront it was our get away. Our only glimmer of hope.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I promise. I’ll be right behind you. [I assured Sarah as I watched JJ go down the ladder first, to ensure it was safe for Sarah to follow. Once JJ gave the “all clear” signal, I gave Sarah and nod to begin descending the ladder] You’ll be okay. JJ will meet you at the bottom, and I won’t be far behind. [I reminded her as she started to descend the ladder. I ducked down lower to the roof as I heard the sound of more gunshots looming in the air. Once Sarah was about halfway down the ladder, I started to position myself onto the ladder; getting a good grip on the sides before I slowly began descending the ladder too. It wasn’t long before I could faintly hear Sarah and JJ safely at the bottom on the ground below the ladder, and I was following them moments later. After I reached the bottom, I noticed the concerned look JJ was giving me, but assuming it had something to do with the fact that we were all still in danger on the Cameron’s grounds, I didn’t question JJ on his strange look. Instead, I snaked my arm gently and protectively around Sarah’s shoulder; gently tugging her closer to me before speaking up in a hushed volume] Okay, we made it this far, which is great, but we’re not out of danger yet. Let’s get to Pope and Kie, and then all of us get the hell out of here. [I suggested before nodding my head toward JJ; gesturing for him to lead the way. The sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better our chances would be of us surviving this]

[ofnotakook]

He’d be right behind me. It was a sense of comfort knowing I wasn’t alone.That I was nearly to safety but the question lingered of how long. Because I felt the bleeding on my hip, I felt the lost of blood that peeled from my skin. Not that Sarah was about to utter a word. If she did their plan of escaping would be jeopardized. And JJ and John B had risked it all for her. Kie and Pope were on the lower ground taking cover on her behalf. Sarah wasn’t selfish; she knew when to take one for the team. Her dad; his shots that were fired. It was venages for her; for the Pogues brainwashing her; but the truth was Sarah saw beneath the scars. She saw the truth. The perfect knit family wasn’t real. She had hoped her father would be okay; that he would let her go. Let the pogues go give John B what was rightfully his. 

But instead he saw me as property. I wasn’t a person to him. I was his daughter yes; but I also was my own mind and heard. All that to say I tried not to shake when I heard the gunshots in the distance. I had my hands holding onto the ladder as JJ slowly helped me down. Blood it was obvious at the edge of the ladder; I easily shook my head to JJ; indicating John B didn’t need to know. I was fine. I Swore I caught an edge of concern against his expression. Did JJ care? I asked myself as feet hit the pavement; the edge of the roof as we lowered ourselves down to the ground. His arm was comfort; he was there with me every step of the way. 

Reaching up with my cleared hand; I intertwined my palm with his own. Above my shoulder as I forced a smile. “ almost there.” I whispered as i felt the throbbing on my side; the dripping of redness down my leg; I just hoped it was dark enough to hide. Enough to give us a clear out before I had to say the words. I was shot; a haunting thought as I saw Kie and Pope in sight. 

“ Once we step down one last step, run to the gates, there’s a boat waiting okay. I’ll get the keys.” I told myself it was a solid plan; despite my obvious discomfort to myself. I leaned up to press a kiss to John B’s hand lips against his thumb before I gave the nod to Kie and Pope. 

It was time to run; it was our only chance; even if it meant the Pogues leaving without me; I could handle my injury and my dad; but John B needed an escape or his life was at risk; and right now I cared less about me and more about his safety. “ Run.” Whispered as hands released his own as my body heavily dropped to the ground. Shots being fired; I leaned down enough to swat; to hide under until the walkway cleared.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I gave a nod of relief to Sarah and JJ once our feet finally hit the pavement below. Sure, I knew we still had a challenge ahead of us, even more of one now that Ward knew I had taken Sarah, so I guarantee he wasn’t the only one firing a gun currently. Now we had him, and his whole damn security department firing at us, too. Regardless, we made it this far, which to some, seemed like an impossible feat in and of itself, but we’re still alive, so that’s something. I justified optimistically as Sarah told us the next part of the plan. Good thing we managed to get her out, because JJ nor I had come up with an escape plan. In normal pogue fashion, we planned to wing it once we reached the point… You know, assuming that we made it this far, I should say] Okay, babe. [I said as I heard her instruct us to “run,” and then she released my hand. Given how close I had already come to losing her, I wasn’t about to let her out of my sight; especially in a dangerous situation like this. With that protective thought in mind, I hadn’t run far before realizing she was no longer at my side, or even behind me] Sarah? Sarah, where are you? [I asked in a hushed volume as I started to back track to find her. It didn’t take me long before I nearly tripped over her as she laid down onto the ground] What are you doing? Are you okay? [Assuming maybe she tripped and hurt herself or something, which is why she didn’t get up and continue running with us. Either way, I waited for the latest bout of gun shots to fade out before I helped Sarah up from the ground. This time snaking my arm around her to keep her close as we prepared to catch up with the others] Can you walk? [Prepared to carry her on my back if she was hurt and couldn’t run. Whatever it took to get Sarah safely out of here, I was all for doing it. Sarah’s safety and freedom was my top priority right now]

[ofnotakook]

A getaway plan; honestly Sarah could easily say she had the grounds of the priority mapped out in her head. But the times she’s visited this house she could count on her hand. It was slim; but right now she had to save herself or she risked the chance of Ward getting his hooks not just in her; but it put the pogues in danger. The same people who risked their lives in order to save her. Sarah didn’t take it for granted; she knew she was a mess. She was someone who was torn between love and her family. But she was locked in her own room on more than one occasion. Her father proved he only cared about the gold. It stung; it made Sarah feel like shit; like she wasn’t enough for her own father. 

But now wasn’t the time; the end was near. She felt her knees wobbly, she felt the lost of blood elevate against her frame. Feet planted against the pavement; her eyes scanned the grounds until they reached Kie and Poper who had keys in their hands; they found the keys to the boat under one of my rocks. It was kinda my getaway car back in the day when I wanted to be reckless; I wanted an escape; apparently it was my younger self telling me to be prepared. Because right now our best bet was to run. Run through the pavements; the mountains of trees to get to the edge. I whispered the words. JJ didn’t need any admission; he ran like hell while guns were being fired. Fired at us; which is why I ducked. Not voluntarily; I had fallen to my knees. I had fell right to the ground. I felt my lungs closing off; I felt the air in my body slowly leaving, as I felt my frame hit the ground in a huff. 

I knew John B; he’d never leave without me. I was kinda surprised he hadn’t picked up on the trail of blood I left on the roof; the ladder in my wake. But to my surprise my secret was that a secret. Eyes closed growing heavy that was until I felt his hands roll onto my own palms. Fingers curled around his hands as I slowly pushed myself back onto my feet. “ I’m okay.” A fat lie I screamed at myself. The dirty blonde moved in the threes; in the brushes; her sneakers ran across the lawn until she heard her feet against the pavement. “ John B.. If I fall behind I need you to run like hell okay.” A demand not an ask. The female whispered in a low tone as fingers tighten around his palm. “ I was shot..’ The words stuck on her tongue as she paused; glancing down to her hip; her hip where there was a big ass stain of redness under her sweater; the white sweater now red; she bit down on her lip in fear; and now she’d be the reason they got caught; from running for their lives. 

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what, I would never leave Sarah behind. She was everything to me. Including my favorite pain in the ass that I argued with like we were already a married couple. Point is, I loved Sarah more than life itself, and even though things were a bit up in the open currently between us, that didn’t matter, because I would always come for her. Case and point when I saw her drop down and without a second thought or hesitation, I went back for her and then waited until she was ready to move before we continued our escape. My face turned pale though as I could feel the blood leaving my cheeks when I heard her confession about being shot] What? You were shot? [Quietly repeating the words back to myself, as if trying to process it, but also hoping that I had heard her wrong and she’d correct me now. Judging by the blood I saw that had stained her shirt, I knew I hadn’t imagined it. My worst nightmare was happening now in the fact that Sarah was hurt] It’s going to be okay. I’ll get you out of here and then we’ll get you help. [I assured her. No way in hell of knowing if she was going to be okay or not. I mean, she was shot. With a bullet. She was bleeding, and I had no way of knowing how much blood she’s lost already, because I was just now hearing she was hurt] Let’s get you on my back, and I’ll carry you out of here. [My way of letting her know that, no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her behind, so this way, if we get caught, we’re going to do so together. I silently justified as I squatted down as low as I could, so Sarah didn’t have to strain too much to shift onto my back]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s family was the why the Pogue’s were in this mess. The why we were fighting for our life’s. Namely the finger needed to be pointed towards my father. The man who wanted to be a proud family man, adoring father was willing to aim guns at his own daughter. He chose a hell of a long time ago. I wasn’t the kook anymore; I was a pogue; the family I decided I wanted. My pure love and adoration for John B. He was my everything. The boy I wanted to bicker with day and night. The boy I wanted to run on adventures with. He understood me, I never felt alone with him; I never felt like I had to pretend. I always felt trapped, the need to run from how I felt those strong feelings until I met him. Until we kissed; and fell insanely in love. 

And this island; the gold being unreachable now; was on me. I was the one who believed in my dad; kept opening my mouth and claiming he loves me, he’d never hurt me. I was the fool a disgrace not only had my brother tried to kill me drown me, my own dad wanted me dead. I had nothing but John B and the pogue’s. They were all I needed. 

Each leg of movement was starting to cause a strain on my body. I had no issues running; it was the open wound on my abdomen that was preventing me from moving fast enough. Knees weak, I could barely keep up. I heard the others in a distant reach the boat; the boat that was gassed up; the keys I knew where they were hidden the backup keys I mean. I remembered going out on this boat as a child; for our family trips on the ocean. What an embarrassing moment now considering. Leaning over my frame; eyes staring at the grass that touched my ankles. Head moving to stare between my legs in order to catch my panting breaths. I felt weak, I said the words. And I swore I heard John B stop; he paused in disbelief but the writing was pooling down my legs; the droplets of blood obvious. Tilting my head up I bit down on my lower lip to hold in the whine the pain of my wound. “ John B..” Name lingered on my tongue as tried to find the how I’d get this boy to leave without me. Instead he decided to bend down to the ground. I hesitated, I didn’t want to hold him back. “ I..” I started but I also know this boy; he’d risk it all for me. It didn’t make sense for both of us to risk being caught here, but with last minute thinking I pulled myself onto his back. Arms wrapped loosely around his neck. Legs wrapping around his waist, once I was safely on his back I rested my head on his shoulder. “ You can move now..” I echoed in a nearly teasing retort. Keep it light; until we escaped. 

A death trap of my own making.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what happened, I would never leave Sarah behind. I wasn’t stupid. I knew us breaking into her family’s compound tonight to break her out was a death trap. It was a fool’s errand, but I didn’t care. Sarah was in danger. She might not see how deranged her father and brother are, but I knew. I saw first-hand what her psychotic father was capable of, so I wouldn’t put anything past him now. Including him hurting his own daughter just to ensure he kept her far away from me. The man was a damn lunatic and the sooner I got Sarah away from him, the better off she’d be. The driving reason I broke into her room tonight. Well, “prison” was probably a more fitting word given the bars her father had put on her windows, so she could be kept there as his prisoner. Asshole. I thought in disdain as we ran toward some semblance of safety. I stopped though when I realized Sarah was no longer behind me. Panic setting in since it was dark, which made it difficult to see. Following the sounds of her breaths and rustling through the grass as I back-tracked back toward her. Shock and fear washing over me in hearing she had been shot. A part of me wondering if taking her back to her father was the best course of action, since his ties and pull could have a doctor here in moments. Still, something told me she wouldn’t want to go back there. She’d choose to take the risk to keep moving] I’ve got you. Don’t worry. I’d never leave without you, Sarah. [I assuredly whispered out as I helped her get situated safely on my back; ensuring her arms were wrapped tightly around my neck and her legs secured around my waist before I started through the trees and such in search of JJ and the others] “John B? Where the hell are you?” [I heard the familiar sound of JJ’s voice airing out nearby in a hushed tone. Moving in the direction of his voice, I eventually caught up with them. Keeping Sarah securely on my back as we reached them] “Ready for the next part of the plan? The diversion?” [JJ asked with pride in his voice, which prompted a skeptical look from me. All of us knowing JJ wasn’t the best at plans, but I did feel better when Pope and Kie chimed in to share that they had actually helped with this part of the plan] If it gets us out of here, then hell yeah, do it! [I muttered out as I watched JJ throw a lit flare in the direction of the wooded area we had all just escaped from, before throwing two others in separate directions of the same wooded area. Listening and watching as I saw a small explosion go off, followed by another, and then countless more. Pope and Kie explaining they rigged those while they were waiting for us to break Sarah out. Chuckling in pride and feeling a momentary sense of victory as I realized we temporarily stopped Ward’s guards from catching up; prompting us to continue running the remaining way off of the compounds and then into the city. Now it was just a matter of finding a place to hide out and to get Sarah medical attention] Sarah was shot, so we need to get her to a doctor before we do anything else. [I explained to the others; watching the wheels practically turning in their head on how to work this one out without all of us ending up getting caught]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s greatest fear was her friends, was the boy she loved getting hurt on her behalf. She always believed in the good in her father; that he had made mistakes. But when it came to their family he always held their best interest at heart. But all the evidence was staked against him. He faked his own death; he was okay with putting his arms around my neck. He was okay with shooting a bullet not knowing where it land. And Sarah was caught in that crossfire. She was scared that her now slow pace would hurt the pogues in the end. Her new Family. And she knew better than to fight with John B, than to plead with him to keep going without her. He’d never leave her behind. He was noble, he was the man that loved her more than his own life. 

And she’d risk it all for him too. He was the light in her new darkness. Sarah tried to hide it; the trail of blood she now kept behind her. She held the wound to her hip as tightly as she could; until she fell. She fell forward breathing heavily feeling the impact of loss blood. She was trying to move forward in the deep grass; but her feet stopped. She had hoped the male had moved far enough forward to forget; about her. But his voice was like a compass calling her home. And she had to smile to herself as she pulled herself onto his back. Bitting down on her lip knowing she was in pain; that pain in her side, the pool of blood that was now hitting his shirt. Head slowly came to rest on his shoulder; weakness inside of her. “ I know..” She whispered in a weakened tone. She held on for dear life; she had her arms wrapped around his neck, and her legs slid around his waist; a sense of safety; as we neared the spot where the others were. 

The night was dark; no one noticed her pale face; the weaken state she was in. Another phase to the plan? Her eyes trailed over to the smirks of her friends; the explosions that they had in fact thrown in the direction of each guard growing on their tails. A small smirk tugged at her lips. Severs Ward right, to come for family; and you get burned. The others glanced at her; as the elephant in the room was exposed. She was shot; weak; blood pooling out of her as she spoke. “ I’m fine.” She said as she rested her head back down on his shoulder. She vaguely heard JJ make a plan. “ We run into town. There’s abandoned buildings, maybe we find a doctor office on our way.” It wasn’t settle or optimistic in any form; but maybe if we found supplies; I could stitch up my own wound. I had no desire to see a doctor again; nor could we trust any person wouldn’t go running to Ward. So I had barely said a word; leaving the decision up to John B; he was the fighter; the leader in this mess. I’d trust him; I’d follow him anywhere.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I nodded in response to JJ’s suggestion. No offense to my best friend, or anything, but when he came up with plans, they usually crashed and burned. Then again, his idea to break Sarah out wasn’t his worst plan. Mind you, she did get shot as a result of the escape, but I don’t know if I can necessarily blame JJ’s plan for that, or just pin the blame on Ward for being a deranged and psychotic piece of shit] I think heading toward the town is a good idea, but Sarah definitely needs a doctor. Kai, you still have the fake IDs we had made up for all of us, right? [Kai nodded in response while flashing me a confused look] Okay, so if we go to a doctor’s office or hospital, we can use the fake IDs, so Sarah’s identity doesn’t get back to her father. Either way, we need to get the bullet out of Sarah, and get her stitched up. That’s our first priority once we get off of this property. [I explained. Knowing Sarah was getting weaker from the blood loss, so the sooner we got her gunshot wound tended to, the more at ease I would feel that she’s going to be okay. Honestly, at this point in time, my only concern was Sarah. I kept that thought to myself though, because I knew if I startled to unravel with worry, everyone else would begin unraveling too. Bottom line, we weren’t going to make it out of this situation alive if we didn’t remain level headed and make the right decisions]

[ofnotakook]

Right decisions; was it ever in our nature? To be smart, to not lead on impulse? In the short time Sarah spend with John B and the pogues, she’s learned JJ and John B tended to make decisions on a whim. They tended to come up with a plan and without thinking ran with it. Granted it Sarah owed her life to the poges, she owed the idea that she was released from the bars of her own bedroom due to them. And she appreciated the fact given the limbo state the male and myself were tethered into that they risked it all for me. The wrath from my dad; the Camerons’s who I was learning spelled terrible news. Sarah always believed in her dad; the type of man he was. He was kind, he cared about his family wanted to provide for us. But the money the power it gave a person it tended to steamroll you into a horrible person. Sarah couldn’t believe her eyes; the lengths her dad was willing to go, harming his own daughter, embedding Rafe despite his own crimes. She felt disgusted with her own family. The blonde knew where she belonged; where her heart was. Holding onto dear life to the man she currently had her arms wrapped around. 

The blonde let nimble fingers graze over the thin layer of his shirt; the weak grip she held. Her wound was obvious, the blood pooling down her leg. Ward got her damn good. And Sarah hated her fate was on the edge of a line. Doctors wasn’t an option, she knew this island. She knew Ward was probably on a warpath now for blood. Pogues won by letting my escape happen, and now he’d be paying off any source he could, to get his hands on me. 

The female listened despite her own body was fading, head rested upon his head; the comfort of his scent, she was always safe with him. Eyes blinked open and closed, and she slowly let her weaken vision take in the pogue’s who glanced in every direction Smoke of the explosion was all in the air, intoxicating. “ Go South, we get on the boat, and port half way down the island, there’s a hidden office, our best bets is escaping this house.” A thought for food; a hidden doctors office; one that may get me home sailing. 

Without the risk of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised that, in spite of her condition, Sarah was the one to air out the best and most sensible plan. Giving a nod in response as I looked toward JJ and the others] You heard her. Head south. [I said in agreement as I continued carrying Sarah on my back as we all made route south toward the docks. Knowing our risk was still higher than not of getting caught, but she was right… If we had a chance of getting out of here and to freedom, this was the one with the best odds. More than anything though, I just wanted to get her somewhere safe, so she could get some medical attention. I could hear by how weak her voice was that she was losing a lot of blood. The longer this continues, the worse her chances of survival were. Once we reached the docks, we ducked into the shadows until reaching the boat. I made sure to get Sarah on safely, and then I laid her down across one of the seats to rest, while I helped JJ and Pope to untie the ropes; all the while Kai started up the boat. Knowing we’d all need to work together, and to do so quickly, or else we weren’t getting out of here alive] Okay, Kai, we’re clear. Get us the hell out of here. [I called out to her as me and the other guys pushed the boat away from the dock to give it an oomph and then once the boat was cleared from the sides, I returned to Sarah] How bad is it? [I asked as I grabbed the first aid kit stowed under the one seat. Not that I could do much with my incredibly limited experience and knowledge, but I felt helpless by not doing what I could for her now. Besides, if I could at least slow the bleeding, that would give her the best fighting chance to stay alive until we were able to get her medical attention]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt like she had lost everything. She used to be the girl who would always go to the beck and call of her dad; he used to be the incredible man she grew up with. He used to be the man who read bedtime stories to her. He used to give her a glass of milk each time. She had so many fond memories of him. But now; it felt like those memories were tainted. Sarah had always believed in him, she fought the urges to go against him. Seeing his boat explode it destroyed her; she broke up with John B the man she loved for him, because he was glad the man who took his father away got justice. Was dead. And suddenly it felt like our love wasn’t meant to be. 

And now Sarah was bleeding out because of the man who was supposed to protect her. He shot fire at her; at her friends not caring of the consequences. That was the sadness of the reality. That I was alone. I couldn’t turn to my sister, I couldn’t protect. I had to put myself first, and that was the pogues my made family. We lift each other up, we go to bat for each other. And I knew the high stakes. I knew what my father was capable of. I had to wonder how I had any ounce of love for him after what he’s done. Lying to protect Rafe, letting my brother get away with attempting to drown me, he let me get drugged. He’d rather put harm to me than take accountability. And I had to swallow that truth. With a heavy head I felt like my vision was becoming blur as I spurred the last task at hand. Hands loosen on the grip against John B’s shirt, as my eyes drifted shut. How long had we walked? Before I heard the rustling of feet hitting the docks. And I felt my body being dropped gently into the boat, back pressed against a hard backing on the edge. Slowly eyes lifted seeing blurs. 

Figures moving left and right; the “ Ropes done.” I heard from JJ as both boys plopped themselves down on the boat. Pope was at the wheel with Kie, I heard the soft whispers of nothingness. And I heard his voice, the one that always dragged me home. And I wanted to be honest, as my hand slowly nimbly moved against the dam fabric of my sweater as I lifted it up. And I saw it the blood, it was dark, and it explained why I felt faint. Turning my eyes to the man I loved; John B was preparing to bandage up the wound for a short time. “ It doesn’t look pretty, I’ll have a nasty scar if anything.” I aired out attempting to lighten the mood as I felt the boat move as if it was full of lighten. 

This remembered me of when I saved his ass, when we first started out; on our little adventure. A shy grin turned against my lips as I spoke. “ Last time one of us had to bandage the other up, I was sneaking you into the house, I saved your ass, are we finally repaying the favor?” I asked with a sense of teasing in my voice. Definitely not the time, but I needed a laugh a small brief moment for just us.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Although I knew now wasn’t the time for jokes and quips, I still appreciated the fact that Sarah was trying to keep the mood light between us. Maybe if the circumstances had been reversed, I would have been all for cracking jokes… Hell, I would more than likely be cracking them too. Given that Sarah had been shot and was rapidly losing blood though, I definitely wasn’t in a fun and games kind of mindset. For her sake though, I did flash her a grin as I leaned down to press a tender kiss to her forehead] Well, I figured I owed you so it was high time I stepped up and returned the favor. Maybe next time you want me to save you though, let’s go with something that involves less blood shed and need for panic… Deal? [Giving it my best effort to joke in return. In the meantime I grabbed the first aid kit. My hand shaking slightly as I quickly fished around for some bandaging and things I thought I could use to stop the bleeding] Either way, I’m putting you in charge of keeping an eye on me to make sure I’m doing this right. I mean, doctor stuff is new territory for me so I’ll need the supervision. All that to say, eyes open at all times, okay? [My casual way of requesting to Sarah that I wanted her to keep her eyes open. Afraid that if she closed them and fell asleep, I might lose her. A thought that I couldn’t bear to consider as I started to do what I could to apply pressure to her wound and then applied some gauze and then bandaging too, all in an effort to stop the significant bleeding she was currently experiencing]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was well aware of the bleeding that now wasn’t the time for her humor, for her need to crack a joke open. But Sarah could see how scared he was; it was in his eyes. She was scared herself that she was about to take her last breath, by the hands of her own father. Ward had no idea she was assuming that he had aimed for her; she had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. Her own father pulled the trigger; he was aiming a weapon at her friends, at the man she loved. And now she was facing deaths door; she remembered the last time. 

John B was the one aching in pain as she ran her fingers with a cold rag over his blooded wound; which is why the dirty blonde showed amusement. Or she was going nuts with the lack of blood in her system. Eyes had slowed movement as he spoke; and she knew this was his way of saying “ Stop Sarah.” As if she planned on taking a bullet tonight. But her smile soften knowing feeling the panic under his tone, and her slimmed hand; her hand reached to touch his arm as a soothing of reassurance that she was okay. “ I promise next time, I’ll tell my dad not to shoot.” She echoed with that sarcastic retort of hers. But Sarah was done with the jokes. Not that she had the energy. She felt like her body was giving out; she felt the color had now drained from her face in the dark. She barely felt the boat moving against the water; the ocean seas; the seas that used to bring soothing. That used to make her feel safe; and now she was trembling, she felt his hand on her wound; and she had glanced down the blood was soaking her skin, right through his hand. “ Use the guse to wipe around the wound, and then bandage it gently at least until we arrive.” To a doctor; assuming we had the money to get me treated; or this was the end. Her eyes landed back on his features, and she uttered an “ I love you.” As if it was the last words she’d say. 

Eyes kept fluttering open and shut in a daze, despite the promise to stay with him, to guide him through the process; she hardly felt her hand move down to her side; as if her limbs were jelly now. If only this boat would move any faster..

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I appreciated Sarah’s attempt to crack jokes now. That was kinda our thing, you could say, but at the moment, I felt far from laughing. I was worried and growing even more so with every passing second. Sarah was shot. She was bleeding out currently, and I had no way of knowing if we’d get her medical attention in time to save her] Speed up the boat! Let’s go! [I yelled out to Pope and Kie as I saw Sarah’s eyes close. Judging by the worried look on JJ’s face, I knew he was thinking the same thing I was] Hurry the hell up, JJ, and help me pack her wound. Quick, get those gauze pads from the bag! [My voice shaking in building worry as JJ did as I ordered; grabbing me what I needed as I tossed the now soiled and blood soaked gauze pads to the side as I took the clean ones from JJ’s grasp. My hand shaking as I pressed it against Sarah’s gunshot wound. After what felt like a damn eternity, the boat pulled to a stop. I didn’t exactly know where we were at the moment, but at this point Pope and Kie were tying off the boat to the pier, so it wouldn’t go anywhere, and then they rushed toward us] “Come on. I got word that there’s a surgeon in town who handles cases like this for the right price.” [Pope explained which prompted my brows to furrow in confusion] “Get Sarah, let’s go.” [Kie instructed, which prompted me to tape off the currently gauzed padding I had in place, then JJ helped me to lift Sarah carefully out of the boat and onto the pier. Once JJ and I were on the pier, I cradled Sarah securely in my arms] “Here, take this bag. It should be enough to get her treated. Pope and I will stay with the boat.” [Kie said as JJ grabbed the bag and the address of the warehouse doctor, and then we rushed through the dark night air toward the provided address. A less than ideal situation from all angles given Sarah’s condition and the fact that we were in an unfamiliar place looking for the location of a doctor that we knew nothing about. Talk about a wild card move, at its best] Stay with me, Sarah. We’re going to get you help. Keep fighting. [I called out to her as JJ barked out instructions and I merely kept up with his pace as I carried Sarah in my arms toward our destination]

[ofnotakook]

A scar that might kill me. 

It was a thought for Sarah; she felt like she’d been through the ringer. Her own family was willing to sacrifice her for their own benefits. Sarah once thought the world of her father; of the family. But now she knew the truth they only craved the wealth they’d stomp on anyone who dared to stand in their way. Sarah’s own brother tried to drown her, and now her father was the one who pulled the trigger. Obviously he was aiming for John B, but Sarah knew she’d always end up in the cross fire. 

Not that she cared, she’d rather die than live without him. The words she said that night; on the smaller boat, as John B fought for his life, to escape the death sentence. And I meant it; I loved John B and yeah we fought; we ended up screaming at each other. But i’d do anything to be with him, and now as I was fighting for my own life; I only hoped the pogues survived. Sarah was falling unconscious, she had felt her body shutting off. The last words she spoke were of love, an undenying world of love for him. But she felt the blood lost. She felt her wounds becoming fetel. And she heard the urgent, the eagerness in her man’s voice as she felt the vague packing of her wound. How long had it been? 

She had no idea, because she felt darkness overcome her. She felt like she was falling into limo. She barely felt John B and JJ as they wrapped her sim arms around their shoulders and held her up. Enough to look like Sarah was walking, but she was dragged towards the clinic, and she barely heard the exchange when the surgeon called the three up. And with each step, she felt a slight ache in her body. An ache she wanted to subside. But Sarach knew she had to fight; to live, to open her eyes again. She felt her frame fall to a bedding; as her head hung down as the surgeon whispered. “ It’ll be okay, fight.” And She fel the breathing tube come to her nose, she felt the bleeding that was exposed. The doctor mumbled a few words to her friends. “ Do you have the money? She may not live.” He uttered and I felt my body weak. My own shadow breathing as my eyes slowly woke, for a second to see the unfamiliar surroundings, the walls brown. The tubes connected to me, I was scared. But I couldn’t move before my eyes went shut all over again. 

The doctor took the money and he soon took a tool; to save me, if it did any good, because right now I felt like I was on the brink of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

“Yeah, man. Here.” [JJ aired out in response to the shifty doctor’s request for money, before handing him a bag with money in it. My eyes shifted into a roll watching the doctor count it. So much for a moral code to save a life. Apparently all this asshole cared about what money] Just save her. Please. [I aired out pleadingly as I held Sarah’s hand with my one hand; all the while gently stroking back the hair from her face with my free hand. After a moment or so the doctor seemed satisfied with the amount of money JJ gave him inside that bag, and then he began. Watching as he first put Sarah under with what I assumed to be some kind of anesthesia before he grabbed a questionable looking scalpel so he could begin making the first cut. I knew in my gut that trusting this doctor might be the worst idea we’ve ever had, but at the same point, our hands were tied. It was either this option or we’d lose Sarah. Sure, his “she may not live” statement didn’t leave me with much confidence in his skills, but I had to believe in Sarah now. Sarah was strong. She was brave. If anyone could fight this, it was her] Come on, baby. Fight this. Don’t you dare leave me. Fight, baby. Fight. [I gently pleaded in her ear before pressing a tender kiss to her forehead] “Keep watch.” [I heard the doctor instruct of JJ before giving me a knowing sort of look and then a nod] “Here we go.” [The doctor said in less than a confident tone as he made the first cut; taking the scalpel across Sarah’s skin in order to remove the bullet from her body. It was excruciating to watch, but I promised myself that no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her side] “Grab those gauze pads and some gloves. Pour some of that vial with sanitizing solution directly over the incision spot and then place the gauze pads firmly across the area to slow her bleeding. We don’t want her losing more blood than she already has.” [The doctor instructed; forcing me to release Sarah’s hand, so I could assist in the surgery. After what felt like an eternity, he finished; managing to remove the bullet and then to seemingly successfully repair damage to her wounded organ internally. Once he finished, he stitched her up then covered the wound with a significant amount of gauze pads and medical tape] “It’s a wait and see, at this point, so let’s hope she’s a fighter.” [The doctor said while washing his hands in the sink in the corner of the room] She is. [I flatly said in response before removing my gloves and washing my own hands once the doctor had finished. After ensuring my hands were clean, I returned to the table where Sarah rested and I took her hand in my own] You’re a fighter, Sarah. The strongest person I know, so fight this. I’m not going anywhere. [I had no way of knowing if she could hear me, but I didn’t care. On the off chance that she could, I was going to remind her of her strength and ability to fight this now]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt the screams into darkness. She felt like she was on a cloud in limo. She had no control of her body; she felt like she was paralyzed. She didn’t have the power to move, she barely felt her body being held up. She didn’t want to die, she didn’t want to be traped in her own bedroom. She never asked her own father to shoot bullets at her and her friends. Sarah suddenly felt like her once simply life was a cycle of nightmares. Death on our door steps, the rush of running; being on the med. Sarah knew her getting shot was her fault. If she had just listened to John B weeks ago; that Ward didn’t have my best interest at heart. 

If I had stayed with Pogues instead of trusting my now psychic family. One trying to kill me left and right. Sarah had learned her lesson, the only people she could count on was herself, the pogues, even her sister she just hoped her sister was okay. She knew she was stipid to be thinking about anyone but herself now. But she held sympathy for others. The aching in her body was enough to force her to scream in pain if she wasn’t knocked out. She vaguely heard the way her body gently was placed down on a mental table.  I vaguely felt John B his breath in my ear as he tried to reassure me I was okay, I was a fighter. I was in my own little bubble. The darkness in my lids, the way my body was lifeless, especially as the doctor did insert his tool into my body, if I was awake I’d be screaming. I barely felt it; probably from the anesthesia. I couldn’t move, I had no idea how long I was out. I could vaguely hear the voices as the doctor echoed out it would be touch and go. Would I be surviving? Was I still bleeding out? Sarah felt the stirs in her mind as she laid still. Baby, fight.. Words echoed in my ears. 

John B, he needed me, he needed me to be strong, to fight through the blood lost. I couldn’t let him down. I was groggy when I suddenly felt the strength to open my eyes. The small light above me it flashed my eyes forcing me to squit, and I felt John B’s head on my stomach, not on the wounded skin, but right under. I was aching as I let out a soft wine. My hand pale as I lowered my hand onto his dirty brown locks, fingers slowly combed through his hair. “ John B.” I echoed in a whisper; I couldn’t speak and I noticed JJ was sitting in the chair, eyes closed, even JJ stayed. A made family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Hours passed by and there was no change. Sarah was so still and I had no way of knowing if she’d ever wake up. The doctor didn’t sound hopeful. Made a snide remark about her chances of pulled through as he greedily took our money and then ran like hell like some kind of coward. Clearly it was all about money for him. As more time passed, I found my head resting against Sarah’s side. Near her incision but not close enough to cause any further damage. I just wanted and needed to be close to her now. JJ wasn’t far away. He took a look out to make sure Ward nor any of his men were nearby before he’d return to the private room here and take a seat in the chair adjacent from where Sarah and I rested now. I didn’t know how much more time had passed… Felt like an eternity even though I knew it was probably just a few more hours, but eventually I heard the faint sound of her voice, as well as felt her fingers rustle gingerly through my hair. At that my head immediately shot up and I looked at her. Relief flooding my face and expression currently] You’re awake! Thank God! [I uttered out in evident relief as I pressed a gentle kiss to the back of her hand] How are you feeling? The black market doctor left a few things for pain if you need it. [The guy wasn’t exactly reliable but he did seem to save Sarah’s life, so at the moment, I was thinking a bit more favorably of him. Maybe he wasn’t a total money-hungry quack after all. Jury was still out on that one though] Do you want some water? [I asked as I had already picked up a fresh bottle of water; prepared to give her some if she was thirsty]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt weak, she ha no idea as to how long she’d been laying her. The memory of her father; of how easily he had aimed a gun at her, at her friends because of what? Jealousy? Because he wanted to hold this wild control over her? Sarah had once desired to please her family. She had once idolize her father the memory of us at the docks when I was only a little girl it clouded who I knew he was. 

But a few hours before he was so willing to throw me under the bus. He was so willing to let me bleed out on our yard. Because of his hate for the Pogues. I was hurt, I was feeling betrayed but at the same time, relieved as I felt my body come to life. I felt my eyes lift open as I adjusted to the dim light. I saw JJ in the corner as my eyes peeled over to John B who had his head rested against my palm. And I knew I was lucky, he was here. He loved me, and I had to let my fingers run soothingly through his dirty blonde locks. A small smile peeled at my lips. And I knew I couldn’t move. I felt numb to my core as my body was now healing from the blood lost, Sarah wasn’t going to jump up, the fear of Ward on our tail was aching against my own skin. The blonde had peered up at him; the man she loved so much. 

“ I’m okay.” As okay as I was going to be. The wound had been deep, the stitched up wound was felt as my eyes slowly moved to the man I loved. My hand moved to reach for John B. And I felt a sigh of relief escape my own lips. And I felt my gaze linger on him. “ I’m sorry, I’m sorry my dad is a crazy,” My words could never compare to the pain my family has caused him, the pogues and I wanted to do my part to mend those fences. “ Yes.” I echoed to the option of water my throat felt dry but I wasn’t going to jump forward, I slowly lifted my head up to get to a sitting position. My free hand had moved to my side, knowing the pain; the wound my own family caused.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I felt mounds of relief when I heard Sarah’s voice. She was alive. She was awake, and she was speaking. Lifting her hand to my lips as I pressed a couple of kisses to the back of her hand, then gently lowered her hand back down onto the metal table she was lying on] Hey, don’t apologize. It’s not your fault. All that matters is keeping you safe and away from your deranged family. [No matter what, I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t let Ward harm Sarah again. I thought to myself as I brought a fresh bottle of water to Sarah’s lips, so she could drink as much as she wanted and needed. I knew she needed time to rest and heal, but the sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better I could guarantee her safety from her family. One could hope, at least. I mean the way Ward operated, and the fact that he knew people all over the world, I wasn’t sure exactly how far remote we would need to go, and for how long either for that matter, in order to keep Sarah safe, but no matter what, I’d do what it takes. I came close to losing Sarah this time… Too close for comfort, so I wasn’t willing to take any chances with her safety again. At least not until Ward was no longer a threat to her] Once you’re well enough, we’re going to get you out of here. Pope and Kie are keeping an eye on the boat, and when you’re strong enough, we’re all getting on that boat, and getting as far away as possible. We figure with some distance and preferably some place off the grid, eventually your father will stop looking for you. [Maybe wishful thinking since Ward wasn’t one who took well to losing, but one could hope he’d eventually give up and accept that Sarah was gone]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah kept asking herself the obvious how she’d been blind. How she was capable of still holding a torch of love for her family. With all the crimes all the ways her own brother tried to murder her; sending drug mules her way, being the one that nearly drowned her to death. And now her own father; was so mad at the Pogues so terrified of losing his daughter to the pogues; not wanting to lose the fight that he aimed and shot me. The blood that once covered her fingertips, the blood the redness that ran over her sweater, it was an image Sarah couldn’t erase.  

Her friends, her boyfriend? Cut into the crossfires because of her fucked up  family. And even now as she opened her eyes; said a few words, she felt the aching on her wound, damn that stitch is gonna hurt like hell. But it was comforting to feel his touch, to witness his lips touching her knuckles once again. John B, he was her anchor that kept her whole. A soften expression; a smile curled at the corners of her lips as she saviored his touch; his lips against her skin. “  They drugged me, they forced me here. I feel trapped like no one is safe in that house, but my sister..”  A fear for the little Cameron it rocked me whole now, as I felt the lump forming in my throat. Wheezie she was innocent had no idea who’s roof she was living under. Like myself; I’d been blinded from the truth. But now my father was deranged; he passed off onto Rafe; and Rose was clueless as ever a pond in the game; until she crossed Ward. 

A slight cough was heard; as the blonde felt the wetness hit her tongue, one sip of water turned into half the bottle until she released the top from her lips and she slowly sat herself up, her palms hitting the metal of the table to hold herself up. Nuts insane considering her own wounds she wore. But her eyes ran along John B’s features with ease. “ You know he won’t let that happen. He blames you the pogues for his princess no longer being in his care. I’m a game for him to win..” A sad truth, an ached formed in her chest now.  “ I wouldn’t blame you if you allowed the pogues to leave me here for  dust to get away. I don’t want to bring you down, or put you and pogues in danger..” Not again the words hid  at the tips of her tongue. 

Danger; our names, but Ward he’d kill to end the war..I was terrified the lengths he’d go no matter how safe I felt with John B; he’d get hurt because of me. A pill I needed to swallow now.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, that would never happen. [I flatly replied with a matter of fact sort of shrug. Sure, I knew if this was just about Sarah, maybe JJ and the others would have high-tailed it out of here. Not necessarily Pope since he had a heart to do the right thing, but Kie was what you could say, hot and cold toward Sarah, so it wouldn’t take much for her to bail on Sarah. And well, JJ hated Kooks in general, so he had no loyalties to Sarah either. Thing was though, they all knew I’d literally die to protect Sarah, and the Pogues would always put their lives on the line to protect each other. All that to say, as long as I was staying put at Sarah’s side, the Pogues wouldn’t be going anywhere either because they’d always have my back, just like I’d always have theirs too. We fought fiercely for each other] Even if the others decided to high-tail it out of here, I’d never leave your side. Unless you tell me to go, I’m not going anywhere… [I started to say before an amused smirk followed] And even then, I can’t promise I’d actually leave. You know I’m stubborn when people try to tell me what to do. [I teased even though that was the truth] Either way, once you’re well enough, we’re all getting the hell out of here, and getting to safety together. Until then, just rest and heal. [I said as I gave her hand another gentle squeeze. My way of reassuring her that we were all in this together; no matter what the outcome]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah knew her choices  as of late not only disappointed herself but those around her. Sarah never wanted the wealth, she never wanted to be accepted as the princess Kook. That title had been given to her. People made assumptions about her; her personality; how she followed the kook business, and yes once upon a time she was a kook. Bu from that one day running around with John B at chapel Hill, helping him seek answers to a quest she had no idea how over our heads we were. We were just kids running around aimlessly. But I saw that treasure hunting look in his eyes; the way his eyes lit up at a map, and I mused, I admired who John B. And he made me want more for myself. 

One day; one rain kiss on the docks was all it took for the dirty blonde to feel hooked. He’s who she loved, and even with death upon us; my dad probably having a search squad on our heads. I had let the pogues down; when I had let John B go, I was angry, I was sad when I thought my dad died, and john B was just so glad to see him fall through the cracks. My dad was money hungry, he was awful he killed, he allowed Rafe to get away with Murder, but he was my dad; but now as I groggily came out of my unconscious state; I remembered the cage I felt locked in. I recalled his aim, the gun shot wound that should’ve killed me. My own father aimed the trigger, and right now Sarah knew in her gut she was a pogue, and she appreciated the friendships she made. Eyes glanced over for comfort to the boy that made her heart race. And her pinky found his; a trace of her finger against his own. 

“ I made that mistake once, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for letting you go John B, I was..” Pausing briefly before a sigh could be heard escaping her lips. “ I was hurting, I didn’t want to believe my dad was this monster. I know you said you’ve always got me, but I wouldn’t blame you if you decided no one chances.” Chances to love me, to be together after this horror war my dad had, all the times guns aimed at us because of him, a war he wanted to win on behalf of me. One he already lost. 

Because my heart; who I was, it was a pogue; my known family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I get it, Sarah. Before I came into your life and opened your eyes to who your dad and brother really are, you had a really tight bond with your dad. Naturally you’d want to fight to protect his reputation. It only makes sense that you wouldn’t want to believe your dad was capable of something like that. If the situation was reversed, and it was me in your shoes, I probably would have done the same thing as you. [I admitted honestly. It was the truth. If this was my dad, I would have fought to protect his reputation too. It’s what you do for the people you love. I’d do it for Sarah and the pogues too because I consider them my family. No matter what, I’d always have their backs, just like I know the pogues would have mine] You’ll never run out of chances with me, Sarah. I hate to break it to you, but I love you, so until you say otherwise, you’re stuck with me. [As much truth as there was in my words, I aired out that honesty with a joking tone] Anyway, for now, we just need to get your strong enough that we can move somewhere safer for the duration of your recovery. [I knew where we were would suffice for now, but it would only be a matter of time before Sarah’s dad figures out we’re hiding out here currently. We’d cross that bridge if and when the time comes. For now I wanted Sarah to get a little stronger and heal up a bit before we decide to move her]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah had always been privileged growing up. She knew of the different layers of the island. She never wanted to believe in herself to judge others; the living, how some had to work harder than others. But Sarah was guilty to pulling away when it felt messy and difficult. When someone got too close to her; she was the one guilty of running. The fear of being seen truly. It’s what happened with her friendship with Kie, and it was easy to blame the split on how John B reacted to her father’s then death. But the truth was Sarah was scared. 

Scared of letting go of the shielded life she lived, the ground beneath her gone. Her family shattered into pieces. Her dad wasn’t the man she once admired. He was a monster; he felt threatened he knew I wasn’t under the spell, and he tried to hurt me. My own brother tried to kill me, did I feel safe with my family? No I was shot because of my dad, and now I felt the numbness against my skin. The numbness that tingled the layer of my stomach; where the scars stood. I wouldn’t blame John B if he wanted to cut loses here, and leave me stranded. But I knew him his heart; the good boy inside of him; the boy I loved with every fiber inside of me. “ It’s not about him anymore. I knew who he was; he wasn’t the dad I once laughed with on the beach when I was a little girl, he knew he lied, he knew what he did, and my brother is protecting him. I’m sorry for the pain my family caused you.” The pogues hanging onto my lips. 

Hearing the words; unlimited chances hung in the air. I love you; and I loved him, I wouldn’t let the male get away from me again. Sarah tried her best to master the pain, the smile heated against brims as her hand grasped hold of his fingers. “ I love you.” words spoken as the blonde attempted to sit up using the strength of her elbows to hold her upper frame upright. But she knew staying put wasn’t an option; Ward had his minions surroundings areas; I would gasp through the pain than get caught. An intense stare hinted into my features as I spoke. “ John B.. we have to move. I can handle the pain. This island isn’t safe not with my dad, he has people..” And I knew Ward; he wanted power; to hold an angle, and us staying still didn’t feel safe; for me or the pogues.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I knew Sara was right… We had to move sooner rather than later. We were basically sitting ducks here. Ward had this whole island in his pocket, so it would only be a matter of time before he got wind of the fact that we were here. I’ll be damned if I did all this work to break Sara out of there… And then to get her the help she needed after she got shot, just for that deranged idiot to take her back to the prison he had her encamped in] Okay, if you’re sure you can handle it, we’ll move. [Worried if she busts a stitch she may bleed out though] We need to take it slow though. Be smart about this. We can’t afford you busting any stitches. If you bleed out… [I trailed off. Not even able to finish off the thought of that possibility] Let me tell JJ we’re going to move. [I said as I pressed a kiss to Sara’s forehead; letting my lips linger there for a second or two before I broke away. It was almost like I didn’t want to let her out of my sight; fearful I’d lose her] Be right back. [I promised as I briefly and reluctantly left the table she was resting on in order to find JJ, who was keeping watch just outside] We’re moving. We need to get off of this island. Alert the others. [JJ agreed; immediately pulling out his phone to message the others to get the boat ready for our momentary departure. In seeing JJ got the ball rolling on that, I returned to Sara. Preparing to move her once she gave me the okay. I still felt unsettled about us leaving, but at least night had set in, so that would give us the advantage as we used the darkness, shadows, and any alleyways we could find to our advantage] Just tell me when, and I’ll help you off the table.

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was embarrassed of who her family was now. It used to be a loving home, used to be a place of safety. The countless family dinners outside on the docks by the grills. The countless boat rides we had. The loving embraces from her dad; he used to be a home for her. And now when she thought about Ward all she felt was anger, betrayal. Someone who only cared about greed, he went out of his way to coverup a death, to frame John B, and now he even if it was an accident he shot me. I was stitched up because of him. All that to say; I didn’t want to be stuck on this island for one more minute. I was on edge, my hand touching the bandaged wound, as I felt the pain. We’re sitting ducks; Ward had his minions all over the island; it was possible he’d be hunting me down. This was a lowkey office; and I doubted this bystander of a doctor was on the payroll. 

I was aching, I didn’t want the drugs, but I also had to put the pogues first; John B first. They came to Nassau for her, Sarah didn’t care if she was limbing in pain whimpering as she sped up to walk as long as we ended up on that boat and made our way back to OBX a home, a new safety. We’d find a way to the gold; our rightful place of earnings. Sarah could see the concern written on John B’s face now, but she was okay. A smile of reassurance coming from her now. She laid kept on the metal table now, as she nodded, biting down on her lower lip to hold out on any pain. “ I promise, slow and steady wins the race.” I added with a joke, Sarah found her more humours side with him. The touch of his lips on her forehead, it made her insides turn, the butterflies now. Sarah had waited until John B had stepped outside to inform JJ before she was able to slowly sit back up. Damn the shooting pain that ran up her side. Deep breaths, Sarah was about to move to step down from the table when she heard her boyfriend, A soft brave smile came to her lips. Reaching out her hand to grasp hold of his arm for support. “ We need to move. I’m ready.” Her stitching may not be; but I could rest once we got safety; but until the docks came into view the dirty blonde wouldn’t feel at ease. 

An unsettling feeling at the pit of her stomach.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised the second I offered my help to Sarah once she was ready, she didn’t hesitate to take my hand. Anybody else would be feeling sorry for themselves and their situation, but not Sarah. She was a total bad ass. By far, the bravest person I knew. Thing was though, I hated moving her. She nearly bled out and died after being shot. Her stitches were the only thing keeping her from doing so now, so what she needed more than anything was to rest and heal. Problem was, her deranged father and his entourage of employees that would be on the look out for us. I didn’t like having to move her from here, but it was either this, or get caught by her father’s people. Neither outcome was ideal, which was why I left the final choice up to Sarah. Her answer clear as day when she held out her hand and took a hold of my arm for support] I can carry you. I’ll do the whole slow and steady thing… Taking your word on the winning the race part you joked about. [Flashing her an amused grin. Knowing now wasn’t the time for fun and jokes, but maybe we both needed a little light humor given the shitty circumstances we were facing. I silently told myself as I helped her off the metal table she was lying across and then kept a secure hold on her until she was steady on her feet] You good? [Needing to know she was okay before I made any further movements or plans]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah should’ve been more hesitant to move. Given the amount of stitches her body had to have, the amount of blood she had lost from that gunshot. The one that came from her father. Sarah if she had too much time to dwell on it would start feeling useless a burden to her own family. Because one her dad was willing to lie for Rafe, yet the innocent child like myself was left to scrape by. Pick a side, and my heart was with the pogues, with John B. And my brother was a bit deranged now, but I suppose father like son, Rafe had to get that attitude from somewhere didn’t he? 

I fought the urge to roll my eyes now. As I found that strength to lift my body up to sit and reach my feet the white tennis shoes to the ground. And I did and felt that aching pain on my lower abdomen. Where the stitches were, and as John B came to view I wore a gentle smile as I reached to brace myself for the pain as I put the weight on my feet. Fingers wrapping around his forearm you felt his muscles now as I found my courage to fully stand. “ I don’t want to make it harder for you to run, I’ll try to keep up.” A promise to my heart, but if John B and the others got hung up because of me I’d never forgive myself. The pogues were in a tough spot because of me. And I hated it, I’d rather bleed out on that table than for them to get caught. All that to say, my hand slid into his bigger palm with a squeeze. “ I’m ready, let’s meet the others.” Conviction in my tone as with an easy step started towards the exit doors; to leave, before my dad found us, before we felt in hot waters.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, I don’t want to run the risk of you popping one of your stitches and bleeding out, so we’ll take it slow and steady. Hell, if we have to crawl there to keep your safe, then so be it. [Mind you I didn’t expect either of us to crawl, obviously, but I was just trying to prove a point now. No matter what risk came to me, Sarah’s safety and well-being would always be my top focus. I silently thought to myself as I gave her hand a gentle squeeze] I’m good carrying you if that will be easier and less painful than you having to walk. [Fortunately the pier wasn’t far from here, but the problem was, we couldn’t exactly walk right down main street to get there since Sarah’s father, no doubt, had people out there looking for us. Nah, we needed to take the most discreet way possible in order to keep ourselves from getting noticed before we reach the boat that would hopefully get us the hell out of there] JJ’s right outside waiting for us… He’s already figured out a plan with the best route we should take to get to the pier where the boat’s waiting for us. [I explained as I securely and protectively held her close to me as she got on her feet; giving her a nod in reply as she gave the “okay” that she was ready] Walking or do you want me to carry you? [Knowing Sarah had an independent side to her so I figured I’d leave the decision up to her]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was fierce and strong. She felt the harbor of why us Pogues were on the run now. It was due to my father. Who had once been the apple of my eye, once been a dependable man. Once been someone I counted on, but he was the one who shot that aim. And landed me fighting for my life. Sarah was scared not that she’d say the words. She was scared of popping her own stitches now. Scared of taking a last breath. And John B he was by my side; he was a good person, even if I got angry with him from time to time. 

“ I’m okay.” An insistent of words. I’m fine. I definitely felt the wound, I felt that skin split when I stood up onto my feet. But i figured if i said the words long enough they’d be true. Sarah was a fighter; she tended to jump into the line of fire without care. And in this case; the pier wasn’t far, her idea of the island she knew it from the back of her head now. And Sarah wanted to be a leader; she wanted to feel empowered to get us pogues out of this mess. And as she stood to her feet; she nodded with a smile, genuine and sweet for him, as her hand laced through his own. “ Okay, but are we sure JJ’s plan is the best? He tends to have outcomes that come knocking on his door..” A grossome expression on her features now, as her hand made its way to his arm, as she prepared to jump on his back. “ I would love to walk John B, but my stitches, my pain level is a 10 right now, so carrying me is best..” Assuming the offer stood. I knew John B he wanted me to be comfortable. 

I was independent by nature, I had my own strength but even I felt that lower pain each time I moved, pick battles and right now I just wanted to be off my feet, and in his arms. A smile a batting of eyes now as I slowly hopped on his back legs wrapped around his waist to prepare for our trip, to the docks, to our ride home.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Eh… [I shrugged slightly in response to her question about JJ’s plan. It was a fair question. JJ was one of my best and most trusted friends, so I’d have his back no matter what, but with that aside, even I couldn’t deny that his track record with his plans working out wasn’t the best. In fact, they failed more often than not. This time around, it seemed like our only option, so even if the odds weren’t necessarily in our favor, we had to give it our best shot] It’s not a great plan, but unfortunately our only option currently. [I confessed. Knowing I couldn’t ever lie to Sarah] In his defense, this seems to be one of his better and more thought out plans, so fingers crossed. [No, that answer wasn’t ideal, or even all that convincing, but again, I couldn’t lie to Sarah. That’s how I felt, so it was a run like hell and hope for the best type of plan right now] Okay, I’ve got you. No matter what. [I assured Sarah as I carefully lifted her up from the floor and into my more than capable arms; cradling her protectively close to me as we cautiously exited the warehouse, met up with JJ who was keeping watch for us right around the corner, and then we started toward the dark alleyways and vacant roadways in an effort to go as unnoticed as possible as we raced like hell toward the boat where the rest of our friend group was waiting]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah had leaped into the pogue life. She had leaped into the trust for John B. She was back to stepping outside of the bubble wrap. It was rushed up adrenaline, it was the adventure, but in this point in time Sarah was scared. Her father had shot at her; the man she once thought stood on a pedestal was the man responsible for her injury. The blood stain through her sweater, the man who put gates over her windows to prevent her from leaving. He grew up on the cut, he transformed his life; he had wealth now. I once admired him, but now when I thought of his face I felt this twirling in my stomach as if my stomach was dropping. 

I was achy, my lower abdomen was in pain, the drugs, the stitching was only going to hold for so long. I knew JJ his lack of track record had spoken for themselves, and I saw that not so trusting expression cross the male’s face even for a split second. But as we established out time was limited before the streets would be swarming with guards, with police, as my father as the huntsmen. I had to swallow any doubt I had, and believe in the only option us pogues had. With a short less than confident bob of my head, the blonde had slipped her arms around John B’s neck, leaning her head on his shoulder, the comfort of his hold. And She wrapped her slander legs around his waist once her grip was in solid ground, she braced herself for the race against time. 

Alleyways with the boys, the short cuts and I had pointed ahead to the marina, where I knew our little boat would be waiting. “ Just straight ahead.” I whispered as if I once grew up here; on this soil summer nights at the beach, late nights on the boats enjoying the sun going down, watchful moons. And now we’re running away; to where? Outer Banks which was once paradise on earth. Hearing from the distant alarms rang off in my head. 

Cops? Worrisome laid out on my face. Let’s hope the others had the rope in hand and ready to back into the ocean the second we landed on the boat.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

No matter what, we’ll figure it out. That’s one thing about the Pogues… Are track record and planning aren’t always great, but we always find a way to get our asses out of trouble. [I joked. Not that this was a time for jokes or quips but I figured Sarah wouldn’t mind the a slight break from the stress and obvious worry she was feeling currently] Besides, when plan A doesn’t work, we’ve got like twenty-five other letters to work through. [I said optimistically while a smirk creased my lips. JJ leading the way; pausing briefly to as we came to openers to make sure nobody was around to catch up before he’d signal with his hand for us to continue] We’re close… [I murmured more so to myself in relief as I saw the waterway approaching. I was eerily confident that if we could make it to the boat without getting caught, that’d we’d be home-free to get the hell away from this island. Sure, I knew it wouldn’t be as easy as I was optimistically trying to write it off as, but I wasn’t anything if not hopeful. Besides, I couldn’t let anything happen to Sarah, so I’d do whatever I needed to in order to get her out of here safely]

[ofnotakook]

Which was true. All joking aside, the pogues had a way of wording or acting themselves out of trouble. The amount of times they’ve nearly gotten themselves thrown in jail and survived. Sarah wasn’t worried about the backup plans, nor was she concerned about putting her trust out in John B. Because she’d trust him with her life. 

It was the sirens, it was alerts that kept cycling through her head. Her fingers held tightly onto John B she swore he felt her grip through his shirt. All that to say, Sarah was nervous. She also knows the island, and her father. He didn’t do well with losing, and when he didn’t have the princess Kook on his side; it was safe to say the man got nervous. And the dirty blonde wasn’t a trophy to be tossed around. Sarah was smart, had her own mind. And this game, this idea that he could steal from the pogues, fake his death it rubbed her wrongly. “ I trust you.” Was all the female was able to muster. Before the crashing of waves were heard, the docks in the clear. I spotted our little boat, the pogues, as Kie waved us over. Leaning my head closer into his neck, I pressed a small kiss to his neck as I leaned my face into him, a smile blossoming on my lips. 

Home free, and as our shoes hit the dock, inches away from the rope of our friends, I spotted the police car, a horn sounded to stop. “ Go.” I said as I aired out with urgency, because it was run or flight, and there’s no way my injury was for nothing. 

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I couldn’t help but to smile when I heard Sarah confess that she trusts me. It boded well for me that she did because let’s be honest, our plans were far from successful the majority of the time. Let’s hoped this latest plan wouldn’t be one of those failed missions. Either way, though, I wasn’t going down without a fight. Especially knowing I held Sarah’s life in my hands right now, too] I got you. [I replied reassuringly as I heard her urgency for us to go. At that, I didn’t hesitate to pick up my pace toward the boat where Kie was waving us down. JJ got into the boat first, then offered his help as I carried Sarah and I into the boat. Fortunately for us, Pope had already started up the boat] Everyone lay low… Let’s get out of here without anyone seeing our faces. [I instructed. It was a fifty-fifty shot that someone would recognize Pope, Kie, or JJ, but Sarah and I definitely needed to keep ourselves low and out of notice at all costs. We were close now… About to put some necessary space between us and Sarah’s father, so we couldn’t blow it now. I thought to myself as I grabbed some towels I found on the floor of the boat and covered Sarah and I with them as Pope put the boat into gear and worked to get us out of this harbor as quickly yet subtly as possible. The key now was to avoid bringing any unnecessary attention to us so we had to remain low and act as naturally as we could]

[ofnotakook]

Our relationship may had felt on the edge of late, the split heavily on our minds, a lack of empathy, a lack of care to others feelings. But when push came to shover John B was a protector, he was someone I trusted to keep me safe, that I was in safe hands if I wasn’t able to take care of myself. Her father used to be an important person to her; but every time we spoke now it was like talking to a wall. He only cared about the gold the money he stole from the pogues. Sarah didn’t believe a word Ward said, plus he locked her up like she was a prisoner instead of his own daughter. Not to mention her little sidekick the bandage on her lower hip was a gift from dear old dad. 

Her family wasn’t hers anymore, it was unhinged, unsteady. She was nearly killed by two members of her own family, blood shed it stayed with her, as fear now built inside of her. Sarah wanted safety, and as she heard the reassurance in the male’s voice her arms securely tighten around his neck as he ran like hell to get to the boat. The roared engine of the boat was faith, With her body slowly hitting the deck of the boat, she quickly laid herself down against the floorboards, towels came down on top of John B and herself; eyes pried on us. Yet our friends no attention was drawn upon them. Sirens getting closer as she felt the boat movement, her hand instinctively had reached for John B under the towels, as a deep breathing of exhale came and went. 

Pope behind the wheel as the boat moved from the dock, JJ being JJ you could hear his own amusement as he aired out “ Have a great day.” To the officers I assumed and you could hear Kie swat his arm of disappointing nature. A roll of my eyes under the towels now, as we waited for the call; the indication we were safe. Our boat swayed against the ocean blues, swiftly. All we needed was a sign; ensure the threat was in our rearview mirror.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I flashed JJ an amused smirk and a head shake when I heard his cocky remark to the officers while you could practically hear Pope’s heart pounding rapidly as he pushed firmer on the throttle to get more distance between the boat and the marina. None of that mattered now though. Sarah was safe… At least for now, and I fully intended to keep it that way. Now it was only a matter of reaching a place where we could get Sarah the medical attention she likely needed, but her father and deranged family wouldn’t find out about it. More than anything, I just wanted Sarah and the others safe. Her father knew a lot of people though, so it was going to be a challenge, to say the least. Given all the challenges and hell the pogues have been through over the years, I was confident we had this one too. Let’s hope my confidence would pay off this time around]

[ofnotakook]

The rapid sounds of her beating heart. The worry, the fear that we’d be discovered. The towels were enough to cover when our bodies felt stiff, down low, the hardness of the boards of the flooring of the boat hitting my back. My body was aching, we just ran like hell, Well more like John B did, the champ he was. Sarah felt guilty for the position john B, the man she loved was in, and the pogues her found family. 

Ward, he played the act well. He played the act of a loving father who would bring no harm, and as a little girl I laughed with hm, I hugged him and felt safe. And now as I felt that obvious weakness in my lower abdomen, I felt like I had no idea who he was, the lengths he was willing to go to win. I had vaguely listened on to JJ and his smart remarks, not to mention Pope who obviously was exhaling deeply. Once I had felt the tug at the bottom of layers of towels, Kie had whispered “ Your good, we’re far enough.” And I didn’t know i was holding my breath, that I was a near wreck of fear until the confided space, until the material was lifted off my face and I exhaled. I looked up at the blue skies, and I turned to John B, my hand had reached over to brush against his. “ Thank you, all of you. “ And I knew I had come up short here and there the conflict between the pogues and my family; but I was confident i’d be welcomed back with open arms. 

Slowly sitting up, I had held the bandaged wound as I exhaled to avoid a whine on my lips. “ I’m sorry my dad my family are assholes, but I am on your side, and i’ll do whatever we have to do to get that upper hand again.” As to where this landed us, not a clue. Because the cross was gone, the gold gone, us on a boat my family’s boat might I add, sailing the ocean, and no idea where we go next. A forced smile on bare lips. What else could go wrong?

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Once Kie called that the coast was clear, we peeled the toweled off of us. My eyes immediately drifted to Sarah in concern. Aside from her rapidly beating heartbeat, which at the moment, I could also relate to, she seemed to be okay… Well, “okay” being a vague definition currently since she was just shot a short while ago] Hey, you’re more Pogue than you are Kook, and us Pogues take care of each other. [I reminded her. I knew JJ always bounced back and forth with this one. One minute he was consider Sarah one of us and seemed accepting, and in the next he was reminding me who her family is and I’d be smart to cut her loose. Knowing JJ, he’d weigh in at some point on how he felt about all of this. Sure, I’m guessing he enjoyed the rush of breaking her out, getting shot at, and then running for our lives, but he’d also probably harbor some bitterness since he’d blame Sarah for us having to do that in the first place. No matter where he stood, Sarah was in my life, and as long as she had me, I’d be in hers too, so like it or not, JJ would have to come to terms with that] “We can’t pick our families. Trust me, if we could, I’d choose literally anyone but my own father to be my father.” [JJ said in response and I nodded agreeably. The point being, it wasn’t Sarah’s fault. She couldn’t help that her family was deranged] You’re safe now. We all are. That’s what matters. [Were we though? Would we ever be fully safe knowing Ward was still out there? The man didn’t like to lose, and we just took his daughter from him, so I had a sinking feeling it would only be a matter of time before he struck again]

[ofnotakook]

Fear peeled out at you. Fear was the emotion that controlled you to stay. And Sarah wasn’t scared of her father, she wasn’t scared that he was the one who shot her. She wasn’t scared that Rafe had once attempted to drown her. Her family was deranged because of fear, fear that she’d talk, that she’d turn on her own family. But the guilt the pressure she felt on her chest, was for John B and the pogues. They got caught in the crosshairs because of her; because of her family. 

And even as she found her heartbeat steadying out now; the female was slowly standing to her feet slightly wobbly. Was it from the active moving boat? Maybe or it was because she felt unsteady. As she had her balance now, she smiled to herself; because despite it all, John B still considered her a pogue, and she felt her hand into her pockets, where she felt that sting of his bandana, the one she had gotten back outside her massive house; and she offered a delighted smile to him as she held out the bandana to him; and she asked the obvious “ Want to do the honors, A pogue for life?” It for a second felt as if we were in a bubble, like JJ hadn’t been speaking to me, about our dislike for our families, and I felt like we were frozen in time, and the cards were in John B’s hands now. 

We’re on a boat, no idea if we’re heading back to the outer banks, or if we were gonna wait it out now. And I knew in my heart; I wasn’t the kook princess anymore, I was a pogue, and this was me saying goodbye to that life.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I didn’t know where Pope was taking the boat now, but I had a feeling it was nowhere near Outer Banks. He wouldn’t return there because that would be the first place Ward came to look for Sarah. Nah, Pope was smart, so he’d pick someplace Ward would never think to look for us. I smiled when I saw Sarah pull out the bandana. It meant a lot to me that she kept it after all this time. “You still have it?” Even though I worded it in the form of a question, it was meant more to be a statement mixed with relief and surprise. “A pogue for life.” I repeated her words as I took the bandana from her grasp and wrapped it around her before tying off the end to keep it in place. “There you go, my little pogue.” I added with a slight grin.

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt guilty because it was her dad, her family that was now chasing the pogues off. We found the gold, it was ours but my family, they had greed, they wanted it for themselves, and I suddenly felt as if John B and the others were losing everything in account of me. And I hated it, I hated the pit in my stomach. For a second I glanced at the tides, the ocean as Pope and Jj were taking in the control, of steering the boat, Kiara was besides them probably wanting to give us a moment, space. Sarah felt like she was a pogue blood didn’t matter to her. 

She wanted this made family, she wanted John B, she loved him. He was everything to her. By now her smilt titled up to the male as she felt his fingers brush along the back of her neck, as he tied the bandana, around her neck, it’s rightful spot. Tilting her head back slightly to offer that loving smile of hers, her fingers brushing over the material of his bandana, she said it so clearly. “ Til death do us part.” A pogue, for life; stuck together, Shifting fully to face him. “ You know you’re kinda stuck  with me now..” All the tension that once rose, it was peace in knowing we had each other now.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

“No complaints from me.” I quietly aired out in response to Sarah’s declaration. Pogues were in it for life. Sure, I knew technically speaking, people would argue that Sarah was a kook not a pogue, but that’s not how I saw it. She was one of us. She had been for a long time now, and nobody was going to convince me otherwise. Thing is, her family is deranged, greedy, out for themselves, and they needed to be stopped, but Sarah was nothing like them. She was good, kind, caring, loyal, brave, and I knew she’d always have our backs. It was who she is. As far as I was concerned, it didn’t matter where her house was technically located in our town… She’s a pogue through and through. I thought to myself as I finished tying off the bandana then I tiled my head downward so I could press a tender kiss to her head. “For now, let us take care of getting out of here in one piece and to get us somewhere safe, while you rest and heal.” I couldn’t downplay Sarah’s injury. The blackmarket doctor may have gotten the bullet out, but I knew in my gut Sarah wasn’t out of the woods yet, so even though we were on the run now, I still wanted to make sure she rested and remained as still as possible in an effort to keep her from bleeding out or any other complications she could face in aftermath of her gunshot wound. 

[ofnotakook]

Sarah knows the lay of the outer Banks. She once believed in the saying of two tribes and one island. Sarah once had belief in her dad, seeing him as the family man. The man who made sacrifices for our family; he came from the cut. But maybe that’s why he was made of greed now. Because he felt like he had to prove himself. And Sarah had once been blinded to idolizing her father but now, she told herself the choice was made. Who she was, who she loved the people that she wanted to surround herself with now. They were in this boat, our freedom was pending. 

Sarah felt his gaze on her; the lost of contact from the bandana and his lips softly against her head, she knew the doctor that healed her wound it wasn’t permanent, she’d feel the scar, she’d feel the pain once the meds wore off, and were they even legal? Now that was a toss up for her now. Tilting her head up with a weak smile she offered a sense of reassurance that she was okay. “ I won’t move until we arrive to wherever we’re going..” Home? To another island where no one knew our names? Pogues, John B, the cards were in their hands; it’s not like I had anything to go home to.. 

I also knew John B he wasn’t a runner, he did when his hands were tied, but this is where JJ and himself might butt heads JJ wanted out; Mexico and John B he was a protector of his land, his home, and no matter what I decided I was with him, through and through.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

My eyes drifted back and forth between Sarah as she rested and the pogues as they worked out the next portion of our impromptu plan. One thing about the pogues was that planning things in great detail... or any detail at all... wasn't a strength of ours. Then again, we had found from experience that our plans typically never panned out anyway, so after awhile, we realized that winging it was more along the right lines for us. All that to say, we didn't do much discussing of where we were going. Aside from the fact that we weren't going back home just yet. Why would we? That's the first place Sarah's dad would think to look for us. No, we needed to go someplace that Sarah's dad didn't have people on his payroll that would immediate rat us out should they see us. "Good plan. Can't have you bleeding out on me. Not when I just got you back." I lightly teased as I flashed her a playful smile. "The island we're going to hide out on isn't far." Pope shared which prompted me to nod in response. I knew we were limited on supplies... food, clothing, basic necessities, but in spite of that fact, I was not at all worried because I knew we would figure it out once we got there. After all, survival was what we all did best. This time would be no exception to that. I thought silently to myself as I remained seated at Sarah's side.

[ofnotakook]

@apogueforlife

Sarah held the weight of the situation the pogues and herself were in. It was her family that was responsible. Sarah had once admired her dad, the man he was. He came from the cut he raised us right he cared about people. How stupid and naive was I? His true colors had come to life; he was all about money greed he even had put his own daughter in harms way. And I still felt stupid even with this battle wound. 

But most of all I was angry, I was mad at myself for trusting him. For believing in him. John B had lost his dad, he had lost everything the gold, his home because of me. Sometimes I wondered how he could still look at me with so much love, with care. He was on the run because of Ward, and as I slowly was raising from the hiding place, I had caught my breath now. As I listened into the plan. A place we wouldn’t be found. An island? Excluded, we’d have to think of something before the boat gas had run out. Glancing at the others, I had reached over to wrap my hand around the male’s as I whispered. “ Where you go, I go okay. No matter where all of us end up.” 

No set plan, I couldn’t believe I was even allowing it but leaving it up to JJ to decide. He wanted an island where it was just us. A plan to fend for ourselves. Laugh again and given my injury my side was in nagging pain as it was; but I sported a brave face. “ An island” JJ had quipped up as he turned to Pope to think considering we were blindly sailing through.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I gave a nod in response to Sarah’s words that she’d go where I went… No matter where that led us. I could see she was upset over what had happened with her father. She trusted him and as a result, she got shot, and we all barely made it out of there alive. Still, I didn’t blame Sarah at all for that. It was natural that she wanted to trust her father. She grew up being very close and attached to her father. They were close. That was evident from the first time I had met him. Of course she wanted to believe that what he was telling her was the truth. I obviously saw right through him, but that made sense for many reasons. For one, I was on the outside looking in, so to speak, which made it easier to see a person’s true colors. Along with that though, I had been dealt so many crappy hands by people who put on a good performance, only to learn that it was all a scheme to deceive me. My point in that was I didn’t trust people easily. The pogues, yes, because they’ve proven time and time again that they’ll always have my back, but that’s about as far as the list goes on who I trust. It was who I am as a result of the life I've had to endure for as long as I can remember. Sarah was different though because she was raised in a completely different way than I was, so it was natural for her to have a more trusting and kind nature than that of my own. “Likewise. I won’t let anything happen to you, Sarah.” My way of letting her know that if her father or his people find us again, we’ll be ready to fight back… No matter what. “The more deserted, the better.” I chimed in on the mention of an island. I was good with the idea… Assuming it wasn’t one that Sarah’s father also all but owned and we wouldn’t be walking into yet another trap.

[ofnotakook]

I can always trust in you

@apogueforlife 

I can always trust in you 

Trust; it had to be earned. Love; it had to be developed. For Sarah she always had her guard up. Each time she’d get close to letting someone in the other shoe would drop, she’d freeze up, and run in the other direction. With each boyfriend she ever had she had the urge to run. To distant herself when she felt like she was trapped. When she felt the pressure to feel more than what she did. Topper he liked the idea of her. He loved the idea of being with her; but he wasn’t in love with her. 

There’s only one boy Sarah loved; and that was John B. It happened unexpectedly. It happened on a day she never saw coming. That day stayed with her. The day we went to chapel hill; the day we had fun dressing each other up. The day we pretended to be our alter egos; Val and Vlad. It was nice to be herself. I didn’t feel the pressure to be perfect. I didn’t feel like my family was watching me, I was myself. I felt safe, I felt like John B saw me despite all the flaws I had. He loved me for me, and I loved him. It was a roller coaster of a relationship if you asked me. We had gone from barely knowing each other; to falling completely utterly in love. I gave up my kook card for him. I knew the obsluces we’d be facing now, the pogue’s vs the kook. But nothing made me question my loyalty to him. To the Pogues. It got messy with my dad; him being the reason Big John was gone. The reason why the gold was taken. The reason I was on the run with John B. The gold felt so close yet so far. We managed to clear John B’s name but that’s because Ward decided in his best interest to fake his own death and act like the hero. The guy that claimed to have been a killer in order to protect his own son. Rafe just the thought of being near him made me sick to my stomach. For a second I was upset, I felt like my whole body ached when I witnessed the boat blow up. When I witnessed my father shatter beyond the sea. And that’s when I saw the truth; what led to us being torn apart; what led to John B and I no longer being together. He had been happy to ward dead; and I couldn’t exactly find the words to blame him. He took everything from him. But at the end of the day; he was my dad. I was hurting and I remembered that look all too well; the look of proudnessI felt like I was seeing another person. I was grieving the dad I once looked up to, to the dad that I was once his princess. I needed John B to hold me, to make me feel like it was always going to be okay. But it suddenly felt like us it wasn’t meant to be.. 

Walking away for yourself; was all you could do. It was hard to be near him; to be pulled back into the adventure; to the cross. But for Pope I’d be there; awkwardness assured. Sarah didn’t know if she should make eye contact with him; or just stay silent. Silence seemed better; until that night; we had a plan to get the cross from Rafe; the big truck was parked outside my house. JJ and Pope were hidden behind the bushes. I was determined to walk inside; to get the key to unlock the truck; how we’d get the heavy cross out was a big ass story of it’s own. But I had made two steps to the gates, one glance backwards; I saw him John B was about to get up; and for a second I found myself hopeful; maybe this was the moment of the unknown. What comes next? Dark hues met for a second and I swore the air was taken out of my lungs; but he didn’t budge, didn’t move. Giving me the indication we had nothing left to say. That was the last memory I had of him; of us staring at each other. 

Head leaned against the gated up windows of my room at the barbados house, The house I was locked into. The boat felt like a nightmare; I was drugged by my own family. Rose had put a drug in my tea. Rafe and had helped her execute the plan; to force me here against my will. I remembered telling Ward when he claimed John B only cared about the treasure about the gold that I was just stuck in the cross hair that he was wrong. That John b would find him and come for him once I went missing. How wrong had I been? I wanted to blink back the tears that dared to fall. I was a pogue at heart; I chose it for John B because I loved him, despite our differences he’d always have a permanent place in my heart. It had been weeks since we left on the boat, I had tried to zone out the conversations of my parents; I had pretended to be sleeping at times, but here once I had been pulled into my room I never left. I guess Ward was afraid I’d run, or threaten to tell the cops his own daughter was kidnapped against her will. Give or take. Sarah swallowed the lump in her throat; it had gotten dark. She smelt the tray of food that her sister left her outside the door. Her bed was an inch away; The light pink covers still in place, it had been a day or two since we arrived, and I had slept in my bed because that meant i was okay, that meant that I was adjusting to being here; in this house. When all I wanted was to break free. At the window, on the seat where my back was pressed against the wall. Head tilted towards the window, I could see the water; any boats that passed by. I was alone; and all I could hope was that the Pogue’s were okay that perhaps my dad was right they managed to get the cross and that’s all that mattered for Pope. Eyes moved to the stars; for a moment it was nice to believe we were looking at the same stars; as if John B was on his way; assuming my dad was lying. For now all I could do was hold hope; I’d find a way out; it was a done deal. 

Tomorrow; I’d work out a plan. The Pogues would have me, if I found him. We’d always have each other. A wistful thought as a hint of a smile tainted onto my lips.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Love. Definitely not something I ever believe really existed. I always saw it more as, in life, people come and go. The ones who matter will stick with you, through thick and thin. For me, that was the Pogues: JJ, Kie, and Pope. I don’t remember a time in my life when those three weren’t part of it, and something tells me, I’ll never shake them either. Not that I’d want to, cause they’re everything to me. Then Sarah Cameron busted into my life unexpectedly… One of those surprising moments where I got myself in a sticky situation, and Sarah Cameron, of all people, was the one who bailed me out of it. Even more surprising though was how I felt when I was with her. It was the first time in my life when I found myself wanting to be with a girl exclusively. In time she even made me rethink my original theory about love. Then, well, I guess you could say life happened, and we broke up. Sure, I knew I played a part in our break up. When her father died, I should have been more supportive of the toll that loss would take on Sarah. Yeah, the guy was bad news… A lying crook, which Sarah obviously knew too, but he was still her father. Given the bad blood I had with Ward, and also the fact that he murdered my father, could you really blame me for being relieved that the guy was finally gone? Right or wrong, it’s how I felt. This leading to the end of Sarah’s and my relationship. Still, in my heart I knew this wasn’t the end for us. A love like ours always finds a way back to one another. Naïve or not, I refused to see it any other way…

Then weeks passed and I was starting to wonder if it really had been the end for us. Mind you, I still wasn’t giving up, but instead of dwelling on what may or may not happen between me and Sarah, instead the Pogues and I focused on getting the cross back for Pope. It actually became a, “Kill two birds with one stone” type of adventure for us though, since word got to me that Sarah had been abducted by her family. Them ultimately boarding a ship with Sarah and the cross, allegedly heading to Barbados; knowing that was exactly where we would be going to. This was it… This was our chance to, not only help Pope get the cross back, but also for me to rescue Sarah too…

Given that us Pogues had made some enemies, and also the fact that we didn’t have so much as a pot to piss in, much less money to travel to Barbados, it took some work, a lot of time, and even more creativity on our parts before we finally reached Barbados. Once we did, I knew we needed to devise a plan to get back both Sarah and the cross. Of course JJ, as usual, came up with one of the worst plans I had ever heard. This saying a lot considering JJ’s had some really shitty plans, over the years. This one pretty much topped the other bad plans he’s had though; prompting all of us to shoot down his plan and come up with another one. Knowing it was either come up with a better plan, or go with JJ’s plan which will likely either get us all killed, or at the very least, we’ll end up locked up in some jail cell. In time we did come up with a new plan. Not a great one, but definitely better than JJ’s plan, so it was something, at least. For our part we decided one step at a time…

We’d wait till night, rescue Sarah first, and then once we had her safely out of that house and away from her deranged family, we’d devise a plan to get the cross back. I mean, it’s not like we could just knock on the front door, and request either. Not without being shot, that is. We couldn’t even break in and steal the cross without getting caught, since it was so damn heavy, it was going to take a hell of a lot of brute strength to carry it, so we’d just deal with that plan later. For now, my focus was on Sarah. Sure, I knew there was a chance I’d be the last person she’d want to see tonight, but given me and the Pogue’s rescuing her, or her remaining a hostage with her own family, I figured I was the lesser of the evils, so to speak. I justified as Kie and Pope remained look outs from the ground; keeping hidden to the garden area where they tried to remain unseen, while JJ and I went to the roof. With JJ’s help, he hoisted me down onto the balcony I had scoped out and learned led to the bedroom they were keeping Sarah locked in. Once I approached the balcony window, I peaked inside discreetly; making sure her family was nowhere in sight before I gave a couple of light taps on the window. My way of alerting Sarah that I was here. Of course the window was pad-locked, which just pissed me off more. How could they do this to Sarah? The Cameron’s definition of family was nothing more than a load of bullshit, if you ask me, because this isn’t how you treat family. I thought in building anger as I used the pin I had with me to trigger the lock. Once I heard it click, my eyes shifted up toward JJ. The thumbs up he gave me in reply assuring me he had cut the security system like he confidently told me he could easily handle. This was JJ, so although I’d trust him with my life, and well, I had a few times, I still held my breath as I slowly and gingerly opened the window; expelling a quiet sigh of relief when an alarm didn’t sound as I opened the window] Val…? [I quietly whispered her code name into the dark bedroom. Hoping it would soften any resentment she might have in seeing me here now] Vlad and the crew are here to spring you from here… [I further whispered into the dark bedroom as I waited for her to come over to the window; knowing we didn’t have long before someone would alert the Cameron’s that the security system had been hacked into, so the sooner we got out of there, the better our chances of getting out of here alive]

[ofnotakook]

The pogue plans never went according to plan. Not that Sarah was going to complain now considering. She was able to escape the bars that locked her into her old bedroom. She was tired of starving herself out of spite. She was tired of laying awake at night in fear that she might be dragged out of bed. She was tired of being forced to live the perfect life. Forced to smile for her parents; the only one in her family she liked was her sister Wheezie, she’s who I wanted to protect. But she had young opinions, didn’t see what our family was capable of. And given how much risk John B went through to find me, I had to go with him. Not that I wanted to stay trapped or that I’d risk his life to save my sister. 

I felt torn with myself now. I escaped; I was on the roof; I had survived the lies, I had survived my own father aiming a gun at me; of course to his unknown knowledge Ward did exceed in his aiming and catching fire on one of us. I doubted his attention was to hurt me. Yet again it felt like a toss up considering, he did try to strangle me to death; and drugged me to get onto that stupid boat. But I knew him to know the problem wasn’t my stubbornness, it was John B and the pogues. He was threatened, and right now the Camerons wasn’t my family; it was the pogues. I had chose them a long time ago weather I wanted to admit it or not. 

Safe; is what I felt; despite the pain that was pooling on my side; the white sweater was making it difficult to hide. But I felt his kiss; the graze of his lips on my head, a tenderness of who we were. A love language for us. Seeing as JJ had followed my lead; and started down the ladder; I had stepped forward turning my back to where my hues fell on the male I loved with all my heart. Despite our differences that did come to light when I uttered the words maybe we weren’t meant to be, to work out. 

A soulfulness in my stare as I uttered my words. “ Promise you’ll come down.” I mouthed the words “ I can’t lose you.” As my palm wasn’t already filled with my own blood. Taking my hand from side, I placed them firmly on the handles of the ladder, with one step and than the next. I caught sight of the droplets of blood hitting the ladder as I climbed down, It wasn’t until I reached the bottom, I felt JJ; place his hand on my hip in order to help me off when he wore this stunned expression. “ Sarah.” He mouthed, I knew he felt it; the blood that now covered his hand; I shook my head. “ Don’t say a word.” I had strength I’d be okay until I couldn’t walk anymore; He was about to say something when I hit him in the chest. 

John B would be in earshot; I couldn’t tell him yet; once we were in the clear I’d tell him, but I didn’t want him to worry about me, not after all the risks he took to save me. Pushing myself to the side, I eyed the small area where our feet hit the grass; Kie and Pope had to make it to the gates; where it led to the waterfront it was our get away. Our only glimmer of hope.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I promise. I’ll be right behind you. [I assured Sarah as I watched JJ go down the ladder first, to ensure it was safe for Sarah to follow. Once JJ gave the “all clear” signal, I gave Sarah and nod to begin descending the ladder] You’ll be okay. JJ will meet you at the bottom, and I won’t be far behind. [I reminded her as she started to descend the ladder. I ducked down lower to the roof as I heard the sound of more gunshots looming in the air. Once Sarah was about halfway down the ladder, I started to position myself onto the ladder; getting a good grip on the sides before I slowly began descending the ladder too. It wasn’t long before I could faintly hear Sarah and JJ safely at the bottom on the ground below the ladder, and I was following them moments later. After I reached the bottom, I noticed the concerned look JJ was giving me, but assuming it had something to do with the fact that we were all still in danger on the Cameron’s grounds, I didn’t question JJ on his strange look. Instead, I snaked my arm gently and protectively around Sarah’s shoulder; gently tugging her closer to me before speaking up in a hushed volume] Okay, we made it this far, which is great, but we’re not out of danger yet. Let’s get to Pope and Kie, and then all of us get the hell out of here. [I suggested before nodding my head toward JJ; gesturing for him to lead the way. The sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better our chances would be of us surviving this]

[ofnotakook]

He’d be right behind me. It was a sense of comfort knowing I wasn’t alone.That I was nearly to safety but the question lingered of how long. Because I felt the bleeding on my hip, I felt the lost of blood that peeled from my skin. Not that Sarah was about to utter a word. If she did their plan of escaping would be jeopardized. And JJ and John B had risked it all for her. Kie and Pope were on the lower ground taking cover on her behalf. Sarah wasn’t selfish; she knew when to take one for the team. Her dad; his shots that were fired. It was venages for her; for the Pogues brainwashing her; but the truth was Sarah saw beneath the scars. She saw the truth. The perfect knit family wasn’t real. She had hoped her father would be okay; that he would let her go. Let the pogues go give John B what was rightfully his. 

But instead he saw me as property. I wasn’t a person to him. I was his daughter yes; but I also was my own mind and heard. All that to say I tried not to shake when I heard the gunshots in the distance. I had my hands holding onto the ladder as JJ slowly helped me down. Blood it was obvious at the edge of the ladder; I easily shook my head to JJ; indicating John B didn’t need to know. I was fine. I Swore I caught an edge of concern against his expression. Did JJ care? I asked myself as feet hit the pavement; the edge of the roof as we lowered ourselves down to the ground. His arm was comfort; he was there with me every step of the way. 

Reaching up with my cleared hand; I intertwined my palm with his own. Above my shoulder as I forced a smile. “ almost there.” I whispered as i felt the throbbing on my side; the dripping of redness down my leg; I just hoped it was dark enough to hide. Enough to give us a clear out before I had to say the words. I was shot; a haunting thought as I saw Kie and Pope in sight. 

“ Once we step down one last step, run to the gates, there’s a boat waiting okay. I’ll get the keys.” I told myself it was a solid plan; despite my obvious discomfort to myself. I leaned up to press a kiss to John B’s hand lips against his thumb before I gave the nod to Kie and Pope. 

It was time to run; it was our only chance; even if it meant the Pogues leaving without me; I could handle my injury and my dad; but John B needed an escape or his life was at risk; and right now I cared less about me and more about his safety. “ Run.” Whispered as hands released his own as my body heavily dropped to the ground. Shots being fired; I leaned down enough to swat; to hide under until the walkway cleared.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I gave a nod of relief to Sarah and JJ once our feet finally hit the pavement below. Sure, I knew we still had a challenge ahead of us, even more of one now that Ward knew I had taken Sarah, so I guarantee he wasn’t the only one firing a gun currently. Now we had him, and his whole damn security department firing at us, too. Regardless, we made it this far, which to some, seemed like an impossible feat in and of itself, but we’re still alive, so that’s something. I justified optimistically as Sarah told us the next part of the plan. Good thing we managed to get her out, because JJ nor I had come up with an escape plan. In normal pogue fashion, we planned to wing it once we reached the point… You know, assuming that we made it this far, I should say] Okay, babe. [I said as I heard her instruct us to “run,” and then she released my hand. Given how close I had already come to losing her, I wasn’t about to let her out of my sight; especially in a dangerous situation like this. With that protective thought in mind, I hadn’t run far before realizing she was no longer at my side, or even behind me] Sarah? Sarah, where are you? [I asked in a hushed volume as I started to back track to find her. It didn’t take me long before I nearly tripped over her as she laid down onto the ground] What are you doing? Are you okay? [Assuming maybe she tripped and hurt herself or something, which is why she didn’t get up and continue running with us. Either way, I waited for the latest bout of gun shots to fade out before I helped Sarah up from the ground. This time snaking my arm around her to keep her close as we prepared to catch up with the others] Can you walk? [Prepared to carry her on my back if she was hurt and couldn’t run. Whatever it took to get Sarah safely out of here, I was all for doing it. Sarah’s safety and freedom was my top priority right now]

[ofnotakook]

A getaway plan; honestly Sarah could easily say she had the grounds of the priority mapped out in her head. But the times she’s visited this house she could count on her hand. It was slim; but right now she had to save herself or she risked the chance of Ward getting his hooks not just in her; but it put the pogues in danger. The same people who risked their lives in order to save her. Sarah didn’t take it for granted; she knew she was a mess. She was someone who was torn between love and her family. But she was locked in her own room on more than one occasion. Her father proved he only cared about the gold. It stung; it made Sarah feel like shit; like she wasn’t enough for her own father. 

But now wasn’t the time; the end was near. She felt her knees wobbly, she felt the lost of blood elevate against her frame. Feet planted against the pavement; her eyes scanned the grounds until they reached Kie and Poper who had keys in their hands; they found the keys to the boat under one of my rocks. It was kinda my getaway car back in the day when I wanted to be reckless; I wanted an escape; apparently it was my younger self telling me to be prepared. Because right now our best bet was to run. Run through the pavements; the mountains of trees to get to the edge. I whispered the words. JJ didn’t need any admission; he ran like hell while guns were being fired. Fired at us; which is why I ducked. Not voluntarily; I had fallen to my knees. I had fell right to the ground. I felt my lungs closing off; I felt the air in my body slowly leaving, as I felt my frame hit the ground in a huff. 

I knew John B; he’d never leave without me. I was kinda surprised he hadn’t picked up on the trail of blood I left on the roof; the ladder in my wake. But to my surprise my secret was that a secret. Eyes closed growing heavy that was until I felt his hands roll onto my own palms. Fingers curled around his hands as I slowly pushed myself back onto my feet. “ I’m okay.” A fat lie I screamed at myself. The dirty blonde moved in the threes; in the brushes; her sneakers ran across the lawn until she heard her feet against the pavement. “ John B.. If I fall behind I need you to run like hell okay.” A demand not an ask. The female whispered in a low tone as fingers tighten around his palm. “ I was shot..’ The words stuck on her tongue as she paused; glancing down to her hip; her hip where there was a big ass stain of redness under her sweater; the white sweater now red; she bit down on her lip in fear; and now she’d be the reason they got caught; from running for their lives. 

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what, I would never leave Sarah behind. She was everything to me. Including my favorite pain in the ass that I argued with like we were already a married couple. Point is, I loved Sarah more than life itself, and even though things were a bit up in the open currently between us, that didn’t matter, because I would always come for her. Case and point when I saw her drop down and without a second thought or hesitation, I went back for her and then waited until she was ready to move before we continued our escape. My face turned pale though as I could feel the blood leaving my cheeks when I heard her confession about being shot] What? You were shot? [Quietly repeating the words back to myself, as if trying to process it, but also hoping that I had heard her wrong and she’d correct me now. Judging by the blood I saw that had stained her shirt, I knew I hadn’t imagined it. My worst nightmare was happening now in the fact that Sarah was hurt] It’s going to be okay. I’ll get you out of here and then we’ll get you help. [I assured her. No way in hell of knowing if she was going to be okay or not. I mean, she was shot. With a bullet. She was bleeding, and I had no way of knowing how much blood she’s lost already, because I was just now hearing she was hurt] Let’s get you on my back, and I’ll carry you out of here. [My way of letting her know that, no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her behind, so this way, if we get caught, we’re going to do so together. I silently justified as I squatted down as low as I could, so Sarah didn’t have to strain too much to shift onto my back]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s family was the why the Pogue’s were in this mess. The why we were fighting for our life’s. Namely the finger needed to be pointed towards my father. The man who wanted to be a proud family man, adoring father was willing to aim guns at his own daughter. He chose a hell of a long time ago. I wasn’t the kook anymore; I was a pogue; the family I decided I wanted. My pure love and adoration for John B. He was my everything. The boy I wanted to bicker with day and night. The boy I wanted to run on adventures with. He understood me, I never felt alone with him; I never felt like I had to pretend. I always felt trapped, the need to run from how I felt those strong feelings until I met him. Until we kissed; and fell insanely in love. 

And this island; the gold being unreachable now; was on me. I was the one who believed in my dad; kept opening my mouth and claiming he loves me, he’d never hurt me. I was the fool a disgrace not only had my brother tried to kill me drown me, my own dad wanted me dead. I had nothing but John B and the pogue’s. They were all I needed. 

Each leg of movement was starting to cause a strain on my body. I had no issues running; it was the open wound on my abdomen that was preventing me from moving fast enough. Knees weak, I could barely keep up. I heard the others in a distant reach the boat; the boat that was gassed up; the keys I knew where they were hidden the backup keys I mean. I remembered going out on this boat as a child; for our family trips on the ocean. What an embarrassing moment now considering. Leaning over my frame; eyes staring at the grass that touched my ankles. Head moving to stare between my legs in order to catch my panting breaths. I felt weak, I said the words. And I swore I heard John B stop; he paused in disbelief but the writing was pooling down my legs; the droplets of blood obvious. Tilting my head up I bit down on my lower lip to hold in the whine the pain of my wound. “ John B..” Name lingered on my tongue as tried to find the how I’d get this boy to leave without me. Instead he decided to bend down to the ground. I hesitated, I didn’t want to hold him back. “ I..” I started but I also know this boy; he’d risk it all for me. It didn’t make sense for both of us to risk being caught here, but with last minute thinking I pulled myself onto his back. Arms wrapped loosely around his neck. Legs wrapping around his waist, once I was safely on his back I rested my head on his shoulder. “ You can move now..” I echoed in a nearly teasing retort. Keep it light; until we escaped. 

A death trap of my own making.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what happened, I would never leave Sarah behind. I wasn’t stupid. I knew us breaking into her family’s compound tonight to break her out was a death trap. It was a fool’s errand, but I didn’t care. Sarah was in danger. She might not see how deranged her father and brother are, but I knew. I saw first-hand what her psychotic father was capable of, so I wouldn’t put anything past him now. Including him hurting his own daughter just to ensure he kept her far away from me. The man was a damn lunatic and the sooner I got Sarah away from him, the better off she’d be. The driving reason I broke into her room tonight. Well, “prison” was probably a more fitting word given the bars her father had put on her windows, so she could be kept there as his prisoner. Asshole. I thought in disdain as we ran toward some semblance of safety. I stopped though when I realized Sarah was no longer behind me. Panic setting in since it was dark, which made it difficult to see. Following the sounds of her breaths and rustling through the grass as I back-tracked back toward her. Shock and fear washing over me in hearing she had been shot. A part of me wondering if taking her back to her father was the best course of action, since his ties and pull could have a doctor here in moments. Still, something told me she wouldn’t want to go back there. She’d choose to take the risk to keep moving] I’ve got you. Don’t worry. I’d never leave without you, Sarah. [I assuredly whispered out as I helped her get situated safely on my back; ensuring her arms were wrapped tightly around my neck and her legs secured around my waist before I started through the trees and such in search of JJ and the others] “John B? Where the hell are you?” [I heard the familiar sound of JJ’s voice airing out nearby in a hushed tone. Moving in the direction of his voice, I eventually caught up with them. Keeping Sarah securely on my back as we reached them] “Ready for the next part of the plan? The diversion?” [JJ asked with pride in his voice, which prompted a skeptical look from me. All of us knowing JJ wasn’t the best at plans, but I did feel better when Pope and Kie chimed in to share that they had actually helped with this part of the plan] If it gets us out of here, then hell yeah, do it! [I muttered out as I watched JJ throw a lit flare in the direction of the wooded area we had all just escaped from, before throwing two others in separate directions of the same wooded area. Listening and watching as I saw a small explosion go off, followed by another, and then countless more. Pope and Kie explaining they rigged those while they were waiting for us to break Sarah out. Chuckling in pride and feeling a momentary sense of victory as I realized we temporarily stopped Ward’s guards from catching up; prompting us to continue running the remaining way off of the compounds and then into the city. Now it was just a matter of finding a place to hide out and to get Sarah medical attention] Sarah was shot, so we need to get her to a doctor before we do anything else. [I explained to the others; watching the wheels practically turning in their head on how to work this one out without all of us ending up getting caught]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s greatest fear was her friends, was the boy she loved getting hurt on her behalf. She always believed in the good in her father; that he had made mistakes. But when it came to their family he always held their best interest at heart. But all the evidence was staked against him. He faked his own death; he was okay with putting his arms around my neck. He was okay with shooting a bullet not knowing where it land. And Sarah was caught in that crossfire. She was scared that her now slow pace would hurt the pogues in the end. Her new Family. And she knew better than to fight with John B, than to plead with him to keep going without her. He’d never leave her behind. He was noble, he was the man that loved her more than his own life. 

And she’d risk it all for him too. He was the light in her new darkness. Sarah tried to hide it; the trail of blood she now kept behind her. She held the wound to her hip as tightly as she could; until she fell. She fell forward breathing heavily feeling the impact of loss blood. She was trying to move forward in the deep grass; but her feet stopped. She had hoped the male had moved far enough forward to forget; about her. But his voice was like a compass calling her home. And she had to smile to herself as she pulled herself onto his back. Bitting down on her lip knowing she was in pain; that pain in her side, the pool of blood that was now hitting his shirt. Head slowly came to rest on his shoulder; weakness inside of her. “ I know..” She whispered in a weakened tone. She held on for dear life; she had her arms wrapped around his neck, and her legs slid around his waist; a sense of safety; as we neared the spot where the others were. 

The night was dark; no one noticed her pale face; the weaken state she was in. Another phase to the plan? Her eyes trailed over to the smirks of her friends; the explosions that they had in fact thrown in the direction of each guard growing on their tails. A small smirk tugged at her lips. Severs Ward right, to come for family; and you get burned. The others glanced at her; as the elephant in the room was exposed. She was shot; weak; blood pooling out of her as she spoke. “ I’m fine.” She said as she rested her head back down on his shoulder. She vaguely heard JJ make a plan. “ We run into town. There’s abandoned buildings, maybe we find a doctor office on our way.” It wasn’t settle or optimistic in any form; but maybe if we found supplies; I could stitch up my own wound. I had no desire to see a doctor again; nor could we trust any person wouldn’t go running to Ward. So I had barely said a word; leaving the decision up to John B; he was the fighter; the leader in this mess. I’d trust him; I’d follow him anywhere.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I nodded in response to JJ’s suggestion. No offense to my best friend, or anything, but when he came up with plans, they usually crashed and burned. Then again, his idea to break Sarah out wasn’t his worst plan. Mind you, she did get shot as a result of the escape, but I don’t know if I can necessarily blame JJ’s plan for that, or just pin the blame on Ward for being a deranged and psychotic piece of shit] I think heading toward the town is a good idea, but Sarah definitely needs a doctor. Kai, you still have the fake IDs we had made up for all of us, right? [Kai nodded in response while flashing me a confused look] Okay, so if we go to a doctor’s office or hospital, we can use the fake IDs, so Sarah’s identity doesn’t get back to her father. Either way, we need to get the bullet out of Sarah, and get her stitched up. That’s our first priority once we get off of this property. [I explained. Knowing Sarah was getting weaker from the blood loss, so the sooner we got her gunshot wound tended to, the more at ease I would feel that she’s going to be okay. Honestly, at this point in time, my only concern was Sarah. I kept that thought to myself though, because I knew if I startled to unravel with worry, everyone else would begin unraveling too. Bottom line, we weren’t going to make it out of this situation alive if we didn’t remain level headed and make the right decisions]

[ofnotakook]

Right decisions; was it ever in our nature? To be smart, to not lead on impulse? In the short time Sarah spend with John B and the pogues, she’s learned JJ and John B tended to make decisions on a whim. They tended to come up with a plan and without thinking ran with it. Granted it Sarah owed her life to the poges, she owed the idea that she was released from the bars of her own bedroom due to them. And she appreciated the fact given the limbo state the male and myself were tethered into that they risked it all for me. The wrath from my dad; the Camerons’s who I was learning spelled terrible news. Sarah always believed in her dad; the type of man he was. He was kind, he cared about his family wanted to provide for us. But the money the power it gave a person it tended to steamroll you into a horrible person. Sarah couldn’t believe her eyes; the lengths her dad was willing to go, harming his own daughter, embedding Rafe despite his own crimes. She felt disgusted with her own family. The blonde knew where she belonged; where her heart was. Holding onto dear life to the man she currently had her arms wrapped around. 

The blonde let nimble fingers graze over the thin layer of his shirt; the weak grip she held. Her wound was obvious, the blood pooling down her leg. Ward got her damn good. And Sarah hated her fate was on the edge of a line. Doctors wasn’t an option, she knew this island. She knew Ward was probably on a warpath now for blood. Pogues won by letting my escape happen, and now he’d be paying off any source he could, to get his hands on me. 

The female listened despite her own body was fading, head rested upon his head; the comfort of his scent, she was always safe with him. Eyes blinked open and closed, and she slowly let her weaken vision take in the pogue’s who glanced in every direction Smoke of the explosion was all in the air, intoxicating. “ Go South, we get on the boat, and port half way down the island, there’s a hidden office, our best bets is escaping this house.” A thought for food; a hidden doctors office; one that may get me home sailing. 

Without the risk of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised that, in spite of her condition, Sarah was the one to air out the best and most sensible plan. Giving a nod in response as I looked toward JJ and the others] You heard her. Head south. [I said in agreement as I continued carrying Sarah on my back as we all made route south toward the docks. Knowing our risk was still higher than not of getting caught, but she was right… If we had a chance of getting out of here and to freedom, this was the one with the best odds. More than anything though, I just wanted to get her somewhere safe, so she could get some medical attention. I could hear by how weak her voice was that she was losing a lot of blood. The longer this continues, the worse her chances of survival were. Once we reached the docks, we ducked into the shadows until reaching the boat. I made sure to get Sarah on safely, and then I laid her down across one of the seats to rest, while I helped JJ and Pope to untie the ropes; all the while Kai started up the boat. Knowing we’d all need to work together, and to do so quickly, or else we weren’t getting out of here alive] Okay, Kai, we’re clear. Get us the hell out of here. [I called out to her as me and the other guys pushed the boat away from the dock to give it an oomph and then once the boat was cleared from the sides, I returned to Sarah] How bad is it? [I asked as I grabbed the first aid kit stowed under the one seat. Not that I could do much with my incredibly limited experience and knowledge, but I felt helpless by not doing what I could for her now. Besides, if I could at least slow the bleeding, that would give her the best fighting chance to stay alive until we were able to get her medical attention]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt like she had lost everything. She used to be the girl who would always go to the beck and call of her dad; he used to be the incredible man she grew up with. He used to be the man who read bedtime stories to her. He used to give her a glass of milk each time. She had so many fond memories of him. But now; it felt like those memories were tainted. Sarah had always believed in him, she fought the urges to go against him. Seeing his boat explode it destroyed her; she broke up with John B the man she loved for him, because he was glad the man who took his father away got justice. Was dead. And suddenly it felt like our love wasn’t meant to be. 

And now Sarah was bleeding out because of the man who was supposed to protect her. He shot fire at her; at her friends not caring of the consequences. That was the sadness of the reality. That I was alone. I couldn’t turn to my sister, I couldn’t protect. I had to put myself first, and that was the pogues my made family. We lift each other up, we go to bat for each other. And I knew the high stakes. I knew what my father was capable of. I had to wonder how I had any ounce of love for him after what he’s done. Lying to protect Rafe, letting my brother get away with attempting to drown me, he let me get drugged. He’d rather put harm to me than take accountability. And I had to swallow that truth. With a heavy head I felt like my vision was becoming blur as I spurred the last task at hand. Hands loosen on the grip against John B’s shirt, as my eyes drifted shut. How long had we walked? Before I heard the rustling of feet hitting the docks. And I felt my body being dropped gently into the boat, back pressed against a hard backing on the edge. Slowly eyes lifted seeing blurs. 

Figures moving left and right; the “ Ropes done.” I heard from JJ as both boys plopped themselves down on the boat. Pope was at the wheel with Kie, I heard the soft whispers of nothingness. And I heard his voice, the one that always dragged me home. And I wanted to be honest, as my hand slowly nimbly moved against the dam fabric of my sweater as I lifted it up. And I saw it the blood, it was dark, and it explained why I felt faint. Turning my eyes to the man I loved; John B was preparing to bandage up the wound for a short time. “ It doesn’t look pretty, I’ll have a nasty scar if anything.” I aired out attempting to lighten the mood as I felt the boat move as if it was full of lighten. 

This remembered me of when I saved his ass, when we first started out; on our little adventure. A shy grin turned against my lips as I spoke. “ Last time one of us had to bandage the other up, I was sneaking you into the house, I saved your ass, are we finally repaying the favor?” I asked with a sense of teasing in my voice. Definitely not the time, but I needed a laugh a small brief moment for just us.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Although I knew now wasn’t the time for jokes and quips, I still appreciated the fact that Sarah was trying to keep the mood light between us. Maybe if the circumstances had been reversed, I would have been all for cracking jokes… Hell, I would more than likely be cracking them too. Given that Sarah had been shot and was rapidly losing blood though, I definitely wasn’t in a fun and games kind of mindset. For her sake though, I did flash her a grin as I leaned down to press a tender kiss to her forehead] Well, I figured I owed you so it was high time I stepped up and returned the favor. Maybe next time you want me to save you though, let’s go with something that involves less blood shed and need for panic… Deal? [Giving it my best effort to joke in return. In the meantime I grabbed the first aid kit. My hand shaking slightly as I quickly fished around for some bandaging and things I thought I could use to stop the bleeding] Either way, I’m putting you in charge of keeping an eye on me to make sure I’m doing this right. I mean, doctor stuff is new territory for me so I’ll need the supervision. All that to say, eyes open at all times, okay? [My casual way of requesting to Sarah that I wanted her to keep her eyes open. Afraid that if she closed them and fell asleep, I might lose her. A thought that I couldn’t bear to consider as I started to do what I could to apply pressure to her wound and then applied some gauze and then bandaging too, all in an effort to stop the significant bleeding she was currently experiencing]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was well aware of the bleeding that now wasn’t the time for her humor, for her need to crack a joke open. But Sarah could see how scared he was; it was in his eyes. She was scared herself that she was about to take her last breath, by the hands of her own father. Ward had no idea she was assuming that he had aimed for her; she had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. Her own father pulled the trigger; he was aiming a weapon at her friends, at the man she loved. And now she was facing deaths door; she remembered the last time. 

John B was the one aching in pain as she ran her fingers with a cold rag over his blooded wound; which is why the dirty blonde showed amusement. Or she was going nuts with the lack of blood in her system. Eyes had slowed movement as he spoke; and she knew this was his way of saying “ Stop Sarah.” As if she planned on taking a bullet tonight. But her smile soften knowing feeling the panic under his tone, and her slimmed hand; her hand reached to touch his arm as a soothing of reassurance that she was okay. “ I promise next time, I’ll tell my dad not to shoot.” She echoed with that sarcastic retort of hers. But Sarah was done with the jokes. Not that she had the energy. She felt like her body was giving out; she felt the color had now drained from her face in the dark. She barely felt the boat moving against the water; the ocean seas; the seas that used to bring soothing. That used to make her feel safe; and now she was trembling, she felt his hand on her wound; and she had glanced down the blood was soaking her skin, right through his hand. “ Use the guse to wipe around the wound, and then bandage it gently at least until we arrive.” To a doctor; assuming we had the money to get me treated; or this was the end. Her eyes landed back on his features, and she uttered an “ I love you.” As if it was the last words she’d say. 

Eyes kept fluttering open and shut in a daze, despite the promise to stay with him, to guide him through the process; she hardly felt her hand move down to her side; as if her limbs were jelly now. If only this boat would move any faster..

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I appreciated Sarah’s attempt to crack jokes now. That was kinda our thing, you could say, but at the moment, I felt far from laughing. I was worried and growing even more so with every passing second. Sarah was shot. She was bleeding out currently, and I had no way of knowing if we’d get her medical attention in time to save her] Speed up the boat! Let’s go! [I yelled out to Pope and Kie as I saw Sarah’s eyes close. Judging by the worried look on JJ’s face, I knew he was thinking the same thing I was] Hurry the hell up, JJ, and help me pack her wound. Quick, get those gauze pads from the bag! [My voice shaking in building worry as JJ did as I ordered; grabbing me what I needed as I tossed the now soiled and blood soaked gauze pads to the side as I took the clean ones from JJ’s grasp. My hand shaking as I pressed it against Sarah’s gunshot wound. After what felt like a damn eternity, the boat pulled to a stop. I didn’t exactly know where we were at the moment, but at this point Pope and Kie were tying off the boat to the pier, so it wouldn’t go anywhere, and then they rushed toward us] “Come on. I got word that there’s a surgeon in town who handles cases like this for the right price.” [Pope explained which prompted my brows to furrow in confusion] “Get Sarah, let’s go.” [Kie instructed, which prompted me to tape off the currently gauzed padding I had in place, then JJ helped me to lift Sarah carefully out of the boat and onto the pier. Once JJ and I were on the pier, I cradled Sarah securely in my arms] “Here, take this bag. It should be enough to get her treated. Pope and I will stay with the boat.” [Kie said as JJ grabbed the bag and the address of the warehouse doctor, and then we rushed through the dark night air toward the provided address. A less than ideal situation from all angles given Sarah’s condition and the fact that we were in an unfamiliar place looking for the location of a doctor that we knew nothing about. Talk about a wild card move, at its best] Stay with me, Sarah. We’re going to get you help. Keep fighting. [I called out to her as JJ barked out instructions and I merely kept up with his pace as I carried Sarah in my arms toward our destination]

[ofnotakook]

A scar that might kill me. 

It was a thought for Sarah; she felt like she’d been through the ringer. Her own family was willing to sacrifice her for their own benefits. Sarah once thought the world of her father; of the family. But now she knew the truth they only craved the wealth they’d stomp on anyone who dared to stand in their way. Sarah’s own brother tried to drown her, and now her father was the one who pulled the trigger. Obviously he was aiming for John B, but Sarah knew she’d always end up in the cross fire. 

Not that she cared, she’d rather die than live without him. The words she said that night; on the smaller boat, as John B fought for his life, to escape the death sentence. And I meant it; I loved John B and yeah we fought; we ended up screaming at each other. But i’d do anything to be with him, and now as I was fighting for my own life; I only hoped the pogues survived. Sarah was falling unconscious, she had felt her body shutting off. The last words she spoke were of love, an undenying world of love for him. But she felt the blood lost. She felt her wounds becoming fetel. And she heard the urgent, the eagerness in her man’s voice as she felt the vague packing of her wound. How long had it been? 

She had no idea, because she felt darkness overcome her. She felt like she was falling into limo. She barely felt John B and JJ as they wrapped her sim arms around their shoulders and held her up. Enough to look like Sarah was walking, but she was dragged towards the clinic, and she barely heard the exchange when the surgeon called the three up. And with each step, she felt a slight ache in her body. An ache she wanted to subside. But Sarach knew she had to fight; to live, to open her eyes again. She felt her frame fall to a bedding; as her head hung down as the surgeon whispered. “ It’ll be okay, fight.” And She fel the breathing tube come to her nose, she felt the bleeding that was exposed. The doctor mumbled a few words to her friends. “ Do you have the money? She may not live.” He uttered and I felt my body weak. My own shadow breathing as my eyes slowly woke, for a second to see the unfamiliar surroundings, the walls brown. The tubes connected to me, I was scared. But I couldn’t move before my eyes went shut all over again. 

The doctor took the money and he soon took a tool; to save me, if it did any good, because right now I felt like I was on the brink of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

“Yeah, man. Here.” [JJ aired out in response to the shifty doctor’s request for money, before handing him a bag with money in it. My eyes shifted into a roll watching the doctor count it. So much for a moral code to save a life. Apparently all this asshole cared about what money] Just save her. Please. [I aired out pleadingly as I held Sarah’s hand with my one hand; all the while gently stroking back the hair from her face with my free hand. After a moment or so the doctor seemed satisfied with the amount of money JJ gave him inside that bag, and then he began. Watching as he first put Sarah under with what I assumed to be some kind of anesthesia before he grabbed a questionable looking scalpel so he could begin making the first cut. I knew in my gut that trusting this doctor might be the worst idea we’ve ever had, but at the same point, our hands were tied. It was either this option or we’d lose Sarah. Sure, his “she may not live” statement didn’t leave me with much confidence in his skills, but I had to believe in Sarah now. Sarah was strong. She was brave. If anyone could fight this, it was her] Come on, baby. Fight this. Don’t you dare leave me. Fight, baby. Fight. [I gently pleaded in her ear before pressing a tender kiss to her forehead] “Keep watch.” [I heard the doctor instruct of JJ before giving me a knowing sort of look and then a nod] “Here we go.” [The doctor said in less than a confident tone as he made the first cut; taking the scalpel across Sarah’s skin in order to remove the bullet from her body. It was excruciating to watch, but I promised myself that no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her side] “Grab those gauze pads and some gloves. Pour some of that vial with sanitizing solution directly over the incision spot and then place the gauze pads firmly across the area to slow her bleeding. We don’t want her losing more blood than she already has.” [The doctor instructed; forcing me to release Sarah’s hand, so I could assist in the surgery. After what felt like an eternity, he finished; managing to remove the bullet and then to seemingly successfully repair damage to her wounded organ internally. Once he finished, he stitched her up then covered the wound with a significant amount of gauze pads and medical tape] “It’s a wait and see, at this point, so let’s hope she’s a fighter.” [The doctor said while washing his hands in the sink in the corner of the room] She is. [I flatly said in response before removing my gloves and washing my own hands once the doctor had finished. After ensuring my hands were clean, I returned to the table where Sarah rested and I took her hand in my own] You’re a fighter, Sarah. The strongest person I know, so fight this. I’m not going anywhere. [I had no way of knowing if she could hear me, but I didn’t care. On the off chance that she could, I was going to remind her of her strength and ability to fight this now]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt the screams into darkness. She felt like she was on a cloud in limo. She had no control of her body; she felt like she was paralyzed. She didn’t have the power to move, she barely felt her body being held up. She didn’t want to die, she didn’t want to be traped in her own bedroom. She never asked her own father to shoot bullets at her and her friends. Sarah suddenly felt like her once simply life was a cycle of nightmares. Death on our door steps, the rush of running; being on the med. Sarah knew her getting shot was her fault. If she had just listened to John B weeks ago; that Ward didn’t have my best interest at heart. 

If I had stayed with Pogues instead of trusting my now psychic family. One trying to kill me left and right. Sarah had learned her lesson, the only people she could count on was herself, the pogues, even her sister she just hoped her sister was okay. She knew she was stipid to be thinking about anyone but herself now. But she held sympathy for others. The aching in her body was enough to force her to scream in pain if she wasn’t knocked out. She vaguely heard the way her body gently was placed down on a mental table.  I vaguely felt John B his breath in my ear as he tried to reassure me I was okay, I was a fighter. I was in my own little bubble. The darkness in my lids, the way my body was lifeless, especially as the doctor did insert his tool into my body, if I was awake I’d be screaming. I barely felt it; probably from the anesthesia. I couldn’t move, I had no idea how long I was out. I could vaguely hear the voices as the doctor echoed out it would be touch and go. Would I be surviving? Was I still bleeding out? Sarah felt the stirs in her mind as she laid still. Baby, fight.. Words echoed in my ears. 

John B, he needed me, he needed me to be strong, to fight through the blood lost. I couldn’t let him down. I was groggy when I suddenly felt the strength to open my eyes. The small light above me it flashed my eyes forcing me to squit, and I felt John B’s head on my stomach, not on the wounded skin, but right under. I was aching as I let out a soft wine. My hand pale as I lowered my hand onto his dirty brown locks, fingers slowly combed through his hair. “ John B.” I echoed in a whisper; I couldn’t speak and I noticed JJ was sitting in the chair, eyes closed, even JJ stayed. A made family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Hours passed by and there was no change. Sarah was so still and I had no way of knowing if she’d ever wake up. The doctor didn’t sound hopeful. Made a snide remark about her chances of pulled through as he greedily took our money and then ran like hell like some kind of coward. Clearly it was all about money for him. As more time passed, I found my head resting against Sarah’s side. Near her incision but not close enough to cause any further damage. I just wanted and needed to be close to her now. JJ wasn’t far away. He took a look out to make sure Ward nor any of his men were nearby before he’d return to the private room here and take a seat in the chair adjacent from where Sarah and I rested now. I didn’t know how much more time had passed… Felt like an eternity even though I knew it was probably just a few more hours, but eventually I heard the faint sound of her voice, as well as felt her fingers rustle gingerly through my hair. At that my head immediately shot up and I looked at her. Relief flooding my face and expression currently] You’re awake! Thank God! [I uttered out in evident relief as I pressed a gentle kiss to the back of her hand] How are you feeling? The black market doctor left a few things for pain if you need it. [The guy wasn’t exactly reliable but he did seem to save Sarah’s life, so at the moment, I was thinking a bit more favorably of him. Maybe he wasn’t a total money-hungry quack after all. Jury was still out on that one though] Do you want some water? [I asked as I had already picked up a fresh bottle of water; prepared to give her some if she was thirsty]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt weak, she ha no idea as to how long she’d been laying her. The memory of her father; of how easily he had aimed a gun at her, at her friends because of what? Jealousy? Because he wanted to hold this wild control over her? Sarah had once desired to please her family. She had once idolize her father the memory of us at the docks when I was only a little girl it clouded who I knew he was. 

But a few hours before he was so willing to throw me under the bus. He was so willing to let me bleed out on our yard. Because of his hate for the Pogues. I was hurt, I was feeling betrayed but at the same time, relieved as I felt my body come to life. I felt my eyes lift open as I adjusted to the dim light. I saw JJ in the corner as my eyes peeled over to John B who had his head rested against my palm. And I knew I was lucky, he was here. He loved me, and I had to let my fingers run soothingly through his dirty blonde locks. A small smile peeled at my lips. And I knew I couldn’t move. I felt numb to my core as my body was now healing from the blood lost, Sarah wasn’t going to jump up, the fear of Ward on our tail was aching against my own skin. The blonde had peered up at him; the man she loved so much. 

“ I’m okay.” As okay as I was going to be. The wound had been deep, the stitched up wound was felt as my eyes slowly moved to the man I loved. My hand moved to reach for John B. And I felt a sigh of relief escape my own lips. And I felt my gaze linger on him. “ I’m sorry, I’m sorry my dad is a crazy,” My words could never compare to the pain my family has caused him, the pogues and I wanted to do my part to mend those fences. “ Yes.” I echoed to the option of water my throat felt dry but I wasn’t going to jump forward, I slowly lifted my head up to get to a sitting position. My free hand had moved to my side, knowing the pain; the wound my own family caused.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I felt mounds of relief when I heard Sarah’s voice. She was alive. She was awake, and she was speaking. Lifting her hand to my lips as I pressed a couple of kisses to the back of her hand, then gently lowered her hand back down onto the metal table she was lying on] Hey, don’t apologize. It’s not your fault. All that matters is keeping you safe and away from your deranged family. [No matter what, I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t let Ward harm Sarah again. I thought to myself as I brought a fresh bottle of water to Sarah’s lips, so she could drink as much as she wanted and needed. I knew she needed time to rest and heal, but the sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better I could guarantee her safety from her family. One could hope, at least. I mean the way Ward operated, and the fact that he knew people all over the world, I wasn’t sure exactly how far remote we would need to go, and for how long either for that matter, in order to keep Sarah safe, but no matter what, I’d do what it takes. I came close to losing Sarah this time… Too close for comfort, so I wasn’t willing to take any chances with her safety again. At least not until Ward was no longer a threat to her] Once you’re well enough, we’re going to get you out of here. Pope and Kie are keeping an eye on the boat, and when you’re strong enough, we’re all getting on that boat, and getting as far away as possible. We figure with some distance and preferably some place off the grid, eventually your father will stop looking for you. [Maybe wishful thinking since Ward wasn’t one who took well to losing, but one could hope he’d eventually give up and accept that Sarah was gone]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah kept asking herself the obvious how she’d been blind. How she was capable of still holding a torch of love for her family. With all the crimes all the ways her own brother tried to murder her; sending drug mules her way, being the one that nearly drowned her to death. And now her own father; was so mad at the Pogues so terrified of losing his daughter to the pogues; not wanting to lose the fight that he aimed and shot me. The blood that once covered her fingertips, the blood the redness that ran over her sweater, it was an image Sarah couldn’t erase.  

Her friends, her boyfriend? Cut into the crossfires because of her fucked up  family. And even now as she opened her eyes; said a few words, she felt the aching on her wound, damn that stitch is gonna hurt like hell. But it was comforting to feel his touch, to witness his lips touching her knuckles once again. John B, he was her anchor that kept her whole. A soften expression; a smile curled at the corners of her lips as she saviored his touch; his lips against her skin. “  They drugged me, they forced me here. I feel trapped like no one is safe in that house, but my sister..”  A fear for the little Cameron it rocked me whole now, as I felt the lump forming in my throat. Wheezie she was innocent had no idea who’s roof she was living under. Like myself; I’d been blinded from the truth. But now my father was deranged; he passed off onto Rafe; and Rose was clueless as ever a pond in the game; until she crossed Ward. 

A slight cough was heard; as the blonde felt the wetness hit her tongue, one sip of water turned into half the bottle until she released the top from her lips and she slowly sat herself up, her palms hitting the metal of the table to hold herself up. Nuts insane considering her own wounds she wore. But her eyes ran along John B’s features with ease. “ You know he won’t let that happen. He blames you the pogues for his princess no longer being in his care. I’m a game for him to win..” A sad truth, an ached formed in her chest now.  “ I wouldn’t blame you if you allowed the pogues to leave me here for  dust to get away. I don’t want to bring you down, or put you and pogues in danger..” Not again the words hid  at the tips of her tongue. 

Danger; our names, but Ward he’d kill to end the war..I was terrified the lengths he’d go no matter how safe I felt with John B; he’d get hurt because of me. A pill I needed to swallow now.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, that would never happen. [I flatly replied with a matter of fact sort of shrug. Sure, I knew if this was just about Sarah, maybe JJ and the others would have high-tailed it out of here. Not necessarily Pope since he had a heart to do the right thing, but Kie was what you could say, hot and cold toward Sarah, so it wouldn’t take much for her to bail on Sarah. And well, JJ hated Kooks in general, so he had no loyalties to Sarah either. Thing was though, they all knew I’d literally die to protect Sarah, and the Pogues would always put their lives on the line to protect each other. All that to say, as long as I was staying put at Sarah’s side, the Pogues wouldn’t be going anywhere either because they’d always have my back, just like I’d always have theirs too. We fought fiercely for each other] Even if the others decided to high-tail it out of here, I’d never leave your side. Unless you tell me to go, I’m not going anywhere… [I started to say before an amused smirk followed] And even then, I can’t promise I’d actually leave. You know I’m stubborn when people try to tell me what to do. [I teased even though that was the truth] Either way, once you’re well enough, we’re all getting the hell out of here, and getting to safety together. Until then, just rest and heal. [I said as I gave her hand another gentle squeeze. My way of reassuring her that we were all in this together; no matter what the outcome]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah knew her choices  as of late not only disappointed herself but those around her. Sarah never wanted the wealth, she never wanted to be accepted as the princess Kook. That title had been given to her. People made assumptions about her; her personality; how she followed the kook business, and yes once upon a time she was a kook. Bu from that one day running around with John B at chapel Hill, helping him seek answers to a quest she had no idea how over our heads we were. We were just kids running around aimlessly. But I saw that treasure hunting look in his eyes; the way his eyes lit up at a map, and I mused, I admired who John B. And he made me want more for myself. 

One day; one rain kiss on the docks was all it took for the dirty blonde to feel hooked. He’s who she loved, and even with death upon us; my dad probably having a search squad on our heads. I had let the pogues down; when I had let John B go, I was angry, I was sad when I thought my dad died, and john B was just so glad to see him fall through the cracks. My dad was money hungry, he was awful he killed, he allowed Rafe to get away with Murder, but he was my dad; but now as I groggily came out of my unconscious state; I remembered the cage I felt locked in. I recalled his aim, the gun shot wound that should’ve killed me. My own father aimed the trigger, and right now Sarah knew in her gut she was a pogue, and she appreciated the friendships she made. Eyes glanced over for comfort to the boy that made her heart race. And her pinky found his; a trace of her finger against his own. 

“ I made that mistake once, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for letting you go John B, I was..” Pausing briefly before a sigh could be heard escaping her lips. “ I was hurting, I didn’t want to believe my dad was this monster. I know you said you’ve always got me, but I wouldn’t blame you if you decided no one chances.” Chances to love me, to be together after this horror war my dad had, all the times guns aimed at us because of him, a war he wanted to win on behalf of me. One he already lost. 

Because my heart; who I was, it was a pogue; my known family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I get it, Sarah. Before I came into your life and opened your eyes to who your dad and brother really are, you had a really tight bond with your dad. Naturally you’d want to fight to protect his reputation. It only makes sense that you wouldn’t want to believe your dad was capable of something like that. If the situation was reversed, and it was me in your shoes, I probably would have done the same thing as you. [I admitted honestly. It was the truth. If this was my dad, I would have fought to protect his reputation too. It’s what you do for the people you love. I’d do it for Sarah and the pogues too because I consider them my family. No matter what, I’d always have their backs, just like I know the pogues would have mine] You’ll never run out of chances with me, Sarah. I hate to break it to you, but I love you, so until you say otherwise, you’re stuck with me. [As much truth as there was in my words, I aired out that honesty with a joking tone] Anyway, for now, we just need to get your strong enough that we can move somewhere safer for the duration of your recovery. [I knew where we were would suffice for now, but it would only be a matter of time before Sarah’s dad figures out we’re hiding out here currently. We’d cross that bridge if and when the time comes. For now I wanted Sarah to get a little stronger and heal up a bit before we decide to move her]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah had always been privileged growing up. She knew of the different layers of the island. She never wanted to believe in herself to judge others; the living, how some had to work harder than others. But Sarah was guilty to pulling away when it felt messy and difficult. When someone got too close to her; she was the one guilty of running. The fear of being seen truly. It’s what happened with her friendship with Kie, and it was easy to blame the split on how John B reacted to her father’s then death. But the truth was Sarah was scared. 

Scared of letting go of the shielded life she lived, the ground beneath her gone. Her family shattered into pieces. Her dad wasn’t the man she once admired. He was a monster; he felt threatened he knew I wasn’t under the spell, and he tried to hurt me. My own brother tried to kill me, did I feel safe with my family? No I was shot because of my dad, and now I felt the numbness against my skin. The numbness that tingled the layer of my stomach; where the scars stood. I wouldn’t blame John B if he wanted to cut loses here, and leave me stranded. But I knew him his heart; the good boy inside of him; the boy I loved with every fiber inside of me. “ It’s not about him anymore. I knew who he was; he wasn’t the dad I once laughed with on the beach when I was a little girl, he knew he lied, he knew what he did, and my brother is protecting him. I’m sorry for the pain my family caused you.” The pogues hanging onto my lips. 

Hearing the words; unlimited chances hung in the air. I love you; and I loved him, I wouldn’t let the male get away from me again. Sarah tried her best to master the pain, the smile heated against brims as her hand grasped hold of his fingers. “ I love you.” words spoken as the blonde attempted to sit up using the strength of her elbows to hold her upper frame upright. But she knew staying put wasn’t an option; Ward had his minions surroundings areas; I would gasp through the pain than get caught. An intense stare hinted into my features as I spoke. “ John B.. we have to move. I can handle the pain. This island isn’t safe not with my dad, he has people..” And I knew Ward; he wanted power; to hold an angle, and us staying still didn’t feel safe; for me or the pogues.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I knew Sara was right… We had to move sooner rather than later. We were basically sitting ducks here. Ward had this whole island in his pocket, so it would only be a matter of time before he got wind of the fact that we were here. I’ll be damned if I did all this work to break Sara out of there… And then to get her the help she needed after she got shot, just for that deranged idiot to take her back to the prison he had her encamped in] Okay, if you’re sure you can handle it, we’ll move. [Worried if she busts a stitch she may bleed out though] We need to take it slow though. Be smart about this. We can’t afford you busting any stitches. If you bleed out… [I trailed off. Not even able to finish off the thought of that possibility] Let me tell JJ we’re going to move. [I said as I pressed a kiss to Sara’s forehead; letting my lips linger there for a second or two before I broke away. It was almost like I didn’t want to let her out of my sight; fearful I’d lose her] Be right back. [I promised as I briefly and reluctantly left the table she was resting on in order to find JJ, who was keeping watch just outside] We’re moving. We need to get off of this island. Alert the others. [JJ agreed; immediately pulling out his phone to message the others to get the boat ready for our momentary departure. In seeing JJ got the ball rolling on that, I returned to Sara. Preparing to move her once she gave me the okay. I still felt unsettled about us leaving, but at least night had set in, so that would give us the advantage as we used the darkness, shadows, and any alleyways we could find to our advantage] Just tell me when, and I’ll help you off the table.

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was embarrassed of who her family was now. It used to be a loving home, used to be a place of safety. The countless family dinners outside on the docks by the grills. The countless boat rides we had. The loving embraces from her dad; he used to be a home for her. And now when she thought about Ward all she felt was anger, betrayal. Someone who only cared about greed, he went out of his way to coverup a death, to frame John B, and now he even if it was an accident he shot me. I was stitched up because of him. All that to say; I didn’t want to be stuck on this island for one more minute. I was on edge, my hand touching the bandaged wound, as I felt the pain. We’re sitting ducks; Ward had his minions all over the island; it was possible he’d be hunting me down. This was a lowkey office; and I doubted this bystander of a doctor was on the payroll. 

I was aching, I didn’t want the drugs, but I also had to put the pogues first; John B first. They came to Nassau for her, Sarah didn’t care if she was limbing in pain whimpering as she sped up to walk as long as we ended up on that boat and made our way back to OBX a home, a new safety. We’d find a way to the gold; our rightful place of earnings. Sarah could see the concern written on John B’s face now, but she was okay. A smile of reassurance coming from her now. She laid kept on the metal table now, as she nodded, biting down on her lower lip to hold out on any pain. “ I promise, slow and steady wins the race.” I added with a joke, Sarah found her more humours side with him. The touch of his lips on her forehead, it made her insides turn, the butterflies now. Sarah had waited until John B had stepped outside to inform JJ before she was able to slowly sit back up. Damn the shooting pain that ran up her side. Deep breaths, Sarah was about to move to step down from the table when she heard her boyfriend, A soft brave smile came to her lips. Reaching out her hand to grasp hold of his arm for support. “ We need to move. I’m ready.” Her stitching may not be; but I could rest once we got safety; but until the docks came into view the dirty blonde wouldn’t feel at ease. 

An unsettling feeling at the pit of her stomach.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised the second I offered my help to Sarah once she was ready, she didn’t hesitate to take my hand. Anybody else would be feeling sorry for themselves and their situation, but not Sarah. She was a total bad ass. By far, the bravest person I knew. Thing was though, I hated moving her. She nearly bled out and died after being shot. Her stitches were the only thing keeping her from doing so now, so what she needed more than anything was to rest and heal. Problem was, her deranged father and his entourage of employees that would be on the look out for us. I didn’t like having to move her from here, but it was either this, or get caught by her father’s people. Neither outcome was ideal, which was why I left the final choice up to Sarah. Her answer clear as day when she held out her hand and took a hold of my arm for support] I can carry you. I’ll do the whole slow and steady thing… Taking your word on the winning the race part you joked about. [Flashing her an amused grin. Knowing now wasn’t the time for fun and jokes, but maybe we both needed a little light humor given the shitty circumstances we were facing. I silently told myself as I helped her off the metal table she was lying across and then kept a secure hold on her until she was steady on her feet] You good? [Needing to know she was okay before I made any further movements or plans]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah should’ve been more hesitant to move. Given the amount of stitches her body had to have, the amount of blood she had lost from that gunshot. The one that came from her father. Sarah if she had too much time to dwell on it would start feeling useless a burden to her own family. Because one her dad was willing to lie for Rafe, yet the innocent child like myself was left to scrape by. Pick a side, and my heart was with the pogues, with John B. And my brother was a bit deranged now, but I suppose father like son, Rafe had to get that attitude from somewhere didn’t he? 

I fought the urge to roll my eyes now. As I found that strength to lift my body up to sit and reach my feet the white tennis shoes to the ground. And I did and felt that aching pain on my lower abdomen. Where the stitches were, and as John B came to view I wore a gentle smile as I reached to brace myself for the pain as I put the weight on my feet. Fingers wrapping around his forearm you felt his muscles now as I found my courage to fully stand. “ I don’t want to make it harder for you to run, I’ll try to keep up.” A promise to my heart, but if John B and the others got hung up because of me I’d never forgive myself. The pogues were in a tough spot because of me. And I hated it, I’d rather bleed out on that table than for them to get caught. All that to say, my hand slid into his bigger palm with a squeeze. “ I’m ready, let’s meet the others.” Conviction in my tone as with an easy step started towards the exit doors; to leave, before my dad found us, before we felt in hot waters.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, I don’t want to run the risk of you popping one of your stitches and bleeding out, so we’ll take it slow and steady. Hell, if we have to crawl there to keep your safe, then so be it. [Mind you I didn’t expect either of us to crawl, obviously, but I was just trying to prove a point now. No matter what risk came to me, Sarah’s safety and well-being would always be my top focus. I silently thought to myself as I gave her hand a gentle squeeze] I’m good carrying you if that will be easier and less painful than you having to walk. [Fortunately the pier wasn’t far from here, but the problem was, we couldn’t exactly walk right down main street to get there since Sarah’s father, no doubt, had people out there looking for us. Nah, we needed to take the most discreet way possible in order to keep ourselves from getting noticed before we reach the boat that would hopefully get us the hell out of there] JJ’s right outside waiting for us… He’s already figured out a plan with the best route we should take to get to the pier where the boat’s waiting for us. [I explained as I securely and protectively held her close to me as she got on her feet; giving her a nod in reply as she gave the “okay” that she was ready] Walking or do you want me to carry you? [Knowing Sarah had an independent side to her so I figured I’d leave the decision up to her]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was fierce and strong. She felt the harbor of why us Pogues were on the run now. It was due to my father. Who had once been the apple of my eye, once been a dependable man. Once been someone I counted on, but he was the one who shot that aim. And landed me fighting for my life. Sarah was scared not that she’d say the words. She was scared of popping her own stitches now. Scared of taking a last breath. And John B he was by my side; he was a good person, even if I got angry with him from time to time. 

“ I’m okay.” An insistent of words. I’m fine. I definitely felt the wound, I felt that skin split when I stood up onto my feet. But i figured if i said the words long enough they’d be true. Sarah was a fighter; she tended to jump into the line of fire without care. And in this case; the pier wasn’t far, her idea of the island she knew it from the back of her head now. And Sarah wanted to be a leader; she wanted to feel empowered to get us pogues out of this mess. And as she stood to her feet; she nodded with a smile, genuine and sweet for him, as her hand laced through his own. “ Okay, but are we sure JJ’s plan is the best? He tends to have outcomes that come knocking on his door..” A grossome expression on her features now, as her hand made its way to his arm, as she prepared to jump on his back. “ I would love to walk John B, but my stitches, my pain level is a 10 right now, so carrying me is best..” Assuming the offer stood. I knew John B he wanted me to be comfortable. 

I was independent by nature, I had my own strength but even I felt that lower pain each time I moved, pick battles and right now I just wanted to be off my feet, and in his arms. A smile a batting of eyes now as I slowly hopped on his back legs wrapped around his waist to prepare for our trip, to the docks, to our ride home.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Eh… [I shrugged slightly in response to her question about JJ’s plan. It was a fair question. JJ was one of my best and most trusted friends, so I’d have his back no matter what, but with that aside, even I couldn’t deny that his track record with his plans working out wasn’t the best. In fact, they failed more often than not. This time around, it seemed like our only option, so even if the odds weren’t necessarily in our favor, we had to give it our best shot] It’s not a great plan, but unfortunately our only option currently. [I confessed. Knowing I couldn’t ever lie to Sarah] In his defense, this seems to be one of his better and more thought out plans, so fingers crossed. [No, that answer wasn’t ideal, or even all that convincing, but again, I couldn’t lie to Sarah. That’s how I felt, so it was a run like hell and hope for the best type of plan right now] Okay, I’ve got you. No matter what. [I assured Sarah as I carefully lifted her up from the floor and into my more than capable arms; cradling her protectively close to me as we cautiously exited the warehouse, met up with JJ who was keeping watch for us right around the corner, and then we started toward the dark alleyways and vacant roadways in an effort to go as unnoticed as possible as we raced like hell toward the boat where the rest of our friend group was waiting]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah had leaped into the pogue life. She had leaped into the trust for John B. She was back to stepping outside of the bubble wrap. It was rushed up adrenaline, it was the adventure, but in this point in time Sarah was scared. Her father had shot at her; the man she once thought stood on a pedestal was the man responsible for her injury. The blood stain through her sweater, the man who put gates over her windows to prevent her from leaving. He grew up on the cut, he transformed his life; he had wealth now. I once admired him, but now when I thought of his face I felt this twirling in my stomach as if my stomach was dropping. 

I was achy, my lower abdomen was in pain, the drugs, the stitching was only going to hold for so long. I knew JJ his lack of track record had spoken for themselves, and I saw that not so trusting expression cross the male’s face even for a split second. But as we established out time was limited before the streets would be swarming with guards, with police, as my father as the huntsmen. I had to swallow any doubt I had, and believe in the only option us pogues had. With a short less than confident bob of my head, the blonde had slipped her arms around John B’s neck, leaning her head on his shoulder, the comfort of his hold. And She wrapped her slander legs around his waist once her grip was in solid ground, she braced herself for the race against time. 

Alleyways with the boys, the short cuts and I had pointed ahead to the marina, where I knew our little boat would be waiting. “ Just straight ahead.” I whispered as if I once grew up here; on this soil summer nights at the beach, late nights on the boats enjoying the sun going down, watchful moons. And now we’re running away; to where? Outer Banks which was once paradise on earth. Hearing from the distant alarms rang off in my head. 

Cops? Worrisome laid out on my face. Let’s hope the others had the rope in hand and ready to back into the ocean the second we landed on the boat.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

No matter what, we’ll figure it out. That’s one thing about the Pogues… Are track record and planning aren’t always great, but we always find a way to get our asses out of trouble. [I joked. Not that this was a time for jokes or quips but I figured Sarah wouldn’t mind the a slight break from the stress and obvious worry she was feeling currently] Besides, when plan A doesn’t work, we’ve got like twenty-five other letters to work through. [I said optimistically while a smirk creased my lips. JJ leading the way; pausing briefly to as we came to openers to make sure nobody was around to catch up before he’d signal with his hand for us to continue] We’re close… [I murmured more so to myself in relief as I saw the waterway approaching. I was eerily confident that if we could make it to the boat without getting caught, that’d we’d be home-free to get the hell away from this island. Sure, I knew it wouldn’t be as easy as I was optimistically trying to write it off as, but I wasn’t anything if not hopeful. Besides, I couldn’t let anything happen to Sarah, so I’d do whatever I needed to in order to get her out of here safely]

[ofnotakook]

Which was true. All joking aside, the pogues had a way of wording or acting themselves out of trouble. The amount of times they’ve nearly gotten themselves thrown in jail and survived. Sarah wasn’t worried about the backup plans, nor was she concerned about putting her trust out in John B. Because she’d trust him with her life. 

It was the sirens, it was alerts that kept cycling through her head. Her fingers held tightly onto John B she swore he felt her grip through his shirt. All that to say, Sarah was nervous. She also knows the island, and her father. He didn’t do well with losing, and when he didn’t have the princess Kook on his side; it was safe to say the man got nervous. And the dirty blonde wasn’t a trophy to be tossed around. Sarah was smart, had her own mind. And this game, this idea that he could steal from the pogues, fake his death it rubbed her wrongly. “ I trust you.” Was all the female was able to muster. Before the crashing of waves were heard, the docks in the clear. I spotted our little boat, the pogues, as Kie waved us over. Leaning my head closer into his neck, I pressed a small kiss to his neck as I leaned my face into him, a smile blossoming on my lips. 

Home free, and as our shoes hit the dock, inches away from the rope of our friends, I spotted the police car, a horn sounded to stop. “ Go.” I said as I aired out with urgency, because it was run or flight, and there’s no way my injury was for nothing. 

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I couldn’t help but to smile when I heard Sarah confess that she trusts me. It boded well for me that she did because let’s be honest, our plans were far from successful the majority of the time. Let’s hoped this latest plan wouldn’t be one of those failed missions. Either way, though, I wasn’t going down without a fight. Especially knowing I held Sarah’s life in my hands right now, too] I got you. [I replied reassuringly as I heard her urgency for us to go. At that, I didn’t hesitate to pick up my pace toward the boat where Kie was waving us down. JJ got into the boat first, then offered his help as I carried Sarah and I into the boat. Fortunately for us, Pope had already started up the boat] Everyone lay low… Let’s get out of here without anyone seeing our faces. [I instructed. It was a fifty-fifty shot that someone would recognize Pope, Kie, or JJ, but Sarah and I definitely needed to keep ourselves low and out of notice at all costs. We were close now… About to put some necessary space between us and Sarah’s father, so we couldn’t blow it now. I thought to myself as I grabbed some towels I found on the floor of the boat and covered Sarah and I with them as Pope put the boat into gear and worked to get us out of this harbor as quickly yet subtly as possible. The key now was to avoid bringing any unnecessary attention to us so we had to remain low and act as naturally as we could]

[ofnotakook]

Our relationship may had felt on the edge of late, the split heavily on our minds, a lack of empathy, a lack of care to others feelings. But when push came to shover John B was a protector, he was someone I trusted to keep me safe, that I was in safe hands if I wasn’t able to take care of myself. Her father used to be an important person to her; but every time we spoke now it was like talking to a wall. He only cared about the gold the money he stole from the pogues. Sarah didn’t believe a word Ward said, plus he locked her up like she was a prisoner instead of his own daughter. Not to mention her little sidekick the bandage on her lower hip was a gift from dear old dad. 

Her family wasn’t hers anymore, it was unhinged, unsteady. She was nearly killed by two members of her own family, blood shed it stayed with her, as fear now built inside of her. Sarah wanted safety, and as she heard the reassurance in the male’s voice her arms securely tighten around his neck as he ran like hell to get to the boat. The roared engine of the boat was faith, With her body slowly hitting the deck of the boat, she quickly laid herself down against the floorboards, towels came down on top of John B and herself; eyes pried on us. Yet our friends no attention was drawn upon them. Sirens getting closer as she felt the boat movement, her hand instinctively had reached for John B under the towels, as a deep breathing of exhale came and went. 

Pope behind the wheel as the boat moved from the dock, JJ being JJ you could hear his own amusement as he aired out “ Have a great day.” To the officers I assumed and you could hear Kie swat his arm of disappointing nature. A roll of my eyes under the towels now, as we waited for the call; the indication we were safe. Our boat swayed against the ocean blues, swiftly. All we needed was a sign; ensure the threat was in our rearview mirror.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I flashed JJ an amused smirk and a head shake when I heard his cocky remark to the officers while you could practically hear Pope’s heart pounding rapidly as he pushed firmer on the throttle to get more distance between the boat and the marina. None of that mattered now though. Sarah was safe… At least for now, and I fully intended to keep it that way. Now it was only a matter of reaching a place where we could get Sarah the medical attention she likely needed, but her father and deranged family wouldn’t find out about it. More than anything, I just wanted Sarah and the others safe. Her father knew a lot of people though, so it was going to be a challenge, to say the least. Given all the challenges and hell the pogues have been through over the years, I was confident we had this one too. Let’s hope my confidence would pay off this time around]

[ofnotakook]

The rapid sounds of her beating heart. The worry, the fear that we’d be discovered. The towels were enough to cover when our bodies felt stiff, down low, the hardness of the boards of the flooring of the boat hitting my back. My body was aching, we just ran like hell, Well more like John B did, the champ he was. Sarah felt guilty for the position john B, the man she loved was in, and the pogues her found family. 

Ward, he played the act well. He played the act of a loving father who would bring no harm, and as a little girl I laughed with hm, I hugged him and felt safe. And now as I felt that obvious weakness in my lower abdomen, I felt like I had no idea who he was, the lengths he was willing to go to win. I had vaguely listened on to JJ and his smart remarks, not to mention Pope who obviously was exhaling deeply. Once I had felt the tug at the bottom of layers of towels, Kie had whispered “ Your good, we’re far enough.” And I didn’t know i was holding my breath, that I was a near wreck of fear until the confided space, until the material was lifted off my face and I exhaled. I looked up at the blue skies, and I turned to John B, my hand had reached over to brush against his. “ Thank you, all of you. “ And I knew I had come up short here and there the conflict between the pogues and my family; but I was confident i’d be welcomed back with open arms. 

Slowly sitting up, I had held the bandaged wound as I exhaled to avoid a whine on my lips. “ I’m sorry my dad my family are assholes, but I am on your side, and i’ll do whatever we have to do to get that upper hand again.” As to where this landed us, not a clue. Because the cross was gone, the gold gone, us on a boat my family’s boat might I add, sailing the ocean, and no idea where we go next. A forced smile on bare lips. What else could go wrong?

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Once Kie called that the coast was clear, we peeled the toweled off of us. My eyes immediately drifted to Sarah in concern. Aside from her rapidly beating heartbeat, which at the moment, I could also relate to, she seemed to be okay… Well, “okay” being a vague definition currently since she was just shot a short while ago] Hey, you’re more Pogue than you are Kook, and us Pogues take care of each other. [I reminded her. I knew JJ always bounced back and forth with this one. One minute he was consider Sarah one of us and seemed accepting, and in the next he was reminding me who her family is and I’d be smart to cut her loose. Knowing JJ, he’d weigh in at some point on how he felt about all of this. Sure, I’m guessing he enjoyed the rush of breaking her out, getting shot at, and then running for our lives, but he’d also probably harbor some bitterness since he’d blame Sarah for us having to do that in the first place. No matter where he stood, Sarah was in my life, and as long as she had me, I’d be in hers too, so like it or not, JJ would have to come to terms with that] “We can’t pick our families. Trust me, if we could, I’d choose literally anyone but my own father to be my father.” [JJ said in response and I nodded agreeably. The point being, it wasn’t Sarah’s fault. She couldn’t help that her family was deranged] You’re safe now. We all are. That’s what matters. [Were we though? Would we ever be fully safe knowing Ward was still out there? The man didn’t like to lose, and we just took his daughter from him, so I had a sinking feeling it would only be a matter of time before he struck again]

[ofnotakook]

Fear peeled out at you. Fear was the emotion that controlled you to stay. And Sarah wasn’t scared of her father, she wasn’t scared that he was the one who shot her. She wasn’t scared that Rafe had once attempted to drown her. Her family was deranged because of fear, fear that she’d talk, that she’d turn on her own family. But the guilt the pressure she felt on her chest, was for John B and the pogues. They got caught in the crosshairs because of her; because of her family. 

And even as she found her heartbeat steadying out now; the female was slowly standing to her feet slightly wobbly. Was it from the active moving boat? Maybe or it was because she felt unsteady. As she had her balance now, she smiled to herself; because despite it all, John B still considered her a pogue, and she felt her hand into her pockets, where she felt that sting of his bandana, the one she had gotten back outside her massive house; and she offered a delighted smile to him as she held out the bandana to him; and she asked the obvious “ Want to do the honors, A pogue for life?” It for a second felt as if we were in a bubble, like JJ hadn’t been speaking to me, about our dislike for our families, and I felt like we were frozen in time, and the cards were in John B’s hands now. 

We’re on a boat, no idea if we’re heading back to the outer banks, or if we were gonna wait it out now. And I knew in my heart; I wasn’t the kook princess anymore, I was a pogue, and this was me saying goodbye to that life.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I didn’t know where Pope was taking the boat now, but I had a feeling it was nowhere near Outer Banks. He wouldn’t return there because that would be the first place Ward came to look for Sarah. Nah, Pope was smart, so he’d pick someplace Ward would never think to look for us. I smiled when I saw Sarah pull out the bandana. It meant a lot to me that she kept it after all this time. “You still have it?” Even though I worded it in the form of a question, it was meant more to be a statement mixed with relief and surprise. “A pogue for life.” I repeated her words as I took the bandana from her grasp and wrapped it around her before tying off the end to keep it in place. “There you go, my little pogue.” I added with a slight grin.

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt guilty because it was her dad, her family that was now chasing the pogues off. We found the gold, it was ours but my family, they had greed, they wanted it for themselves, and I suddenly felt as if John B and the others were losing everything in account of me. And I hated it, I hated the pit in my stomach. For a second I glanced at the tides, the ocean as Pope and Jj were taking in the control, of steering the boat, Kiara was besides them probably wanting to give us a moment, space. Sarah felt like she was a pogue blood didn’t matter to her. 

She wanted this made family, she wanted John B, she loved him. He was everything to her. By now her smilt titled up to the male as she felt his fingers brush along the back of her neck, as he tied the bandana, around her neck, it’s rightful spot. Tilting her head back slightly to offer that loving smile of hers, her fingers brushing over the material of his bandana, she said it so clearly. “ Til death do us part.” A pogue, for life; stuck together, Shifting fully to face him. “ You know you’re kinda stuck  with me now..” All the tension that once rose, it was peace in knowing we had each other now.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

“No complaints from me.” I quietly aired out in response to Sarah’s declaration. Pogues were in it for life. Sure, I knew technically speaking, people would argue that Sarah was a kook not a pogue, but that’s not how I saw it. She was one of us. She had been for a long time now, and nobody was going to convince me otherwise. Thing is, her family is deranged, greedy, out for themselves, and they needed to be stopped, but Sarah was nothing like them. She was good, kind, caring, loyal, brave, and I knew she’d always have our backs. It was who she is. As far as I was concerned, it didn’t matter where her house was technically located in our town… She’s a pogue through and through. I thought to myself as I finished tying off the bandana then I tiled my head downward so I could press a tender kiss to her head. “For now, let us take care of getting out of here in one piece and to get us somewhere safe, while you rest and heal.” I couldn’t downplay Sarah’s injury. The blackmarket doctor may have gotten the bullet out, but I knew in my gut Sarah wasn’t out of the woods yet, so even though we were on the run now, I still wanted to make sure she rested and remained as still as possible in an effort to keep her from bleeding out or any other complications she could face in aftermath of her gunshot wound. 

[ofnotakook]

Sarah knows the lay of the outer Banks. She once believed in the saying of two tribes and one island. Sarah once had belief in her dad, seeing him as the family man. The man who made sacrifices for our family; he came from the cut. But maybe that’s why he was made of greed now. Because he felt like he had to prove himself. And Sarah had once been blinded to idolizing her father but now, she told herself the choice was made. Who she was, who she loved the people that she wanted to surround herself with now. They were in this boat, our freedom was pending. 

Sarah felt his gaze on her; the lost of contact from the bandana and his lips softly against her head, she knew the doctor that healed her wound it wasn’t permanent, she’d feel the scar, she’d feel the pain once the meds wore off, and were they even legal? Now that was a toss up for her now. Tilting her head up with a weak smile she offered a sense of reassurance that she was okay. “ I won’t move until we arrive to wherever we’re going..” Home? To another island where no one knew our names? Pogues, John B, the cards were in their hands; it’s not like I had anything to go home to.. 

I also knew John B he wasn’t a runner, he did when his hands were tied, but this is where JJ and himself might butt heads JJ wanted out; Mexico and John B he was a protector of his land, his home, and no matter what I decided I was with him, through and through.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I would have liked nothing more than to return home after this. I wasn't one to run. You run and they just keep chasing you. At least that's the way I always saw it. Besides, you run and your enemies see you as weak. I was tired of being the prey and I wanted nothing more than to fight back. That said, if it was up to me, I'd vote for us to return home... It wasn't just me I had to consider this time around though. Sarah was injured. She needed time to heal, so she was in no position to fight back against her deranged father and family. All that to say, putting her in even more danger wasn't an option I was willing to consider. There's also the rest of the pogues I needed to consider too. They had already put their own lives on the line because of my determination to free Sarah from her family, and I couldn't put them in even more danger. With all of that weighing heavily on my mind, when JJ suggested us putting as much distance between ourselves and home until all of this stuff blows over, I nodded in agreement. JJ and I typically would have butted heads on his idea to run, but not this time around. I had to put everyone else's safety above my own pride here and now. "Wherever we go, we need to lay low for awhile, and with that, go somewhere where Ward and his men won't think to look for us." I suggested as JJ nodded in response.

[ofnotakook]

I can always trust in you

@apogueforlife 

I can always trust in you 

Trust; it had to be earned. Love; it had to be developed. For Sarah she always had her guard up. Each time she’d get close to letting someone in the other shoe would drop, she’d freeze up, and run in the other direction. With each boyfriend she ever had she had the urge to run. To distant herself when she felt like she was trapped. When she felt the pressure to feel more than what she did. Topper he liked the idea of her. He loved the idea of being with her; but he wasn’t in love with her. 

There’s only one boy Sarah loved; and that was John B. It happened unexpectedly. It happened on a day she never saw coming. That day stayed with her. The day we went to chapel hill; the day we had fun dressing each other up. The day we pretended to be our alter egos; Val and Vlad. It was nice to be herself. I didn’t feel the pressure to be perfect. I didn’t feel like my family was watching me, I was myself. I felt safe, I felt like John B saw me despite all the flaws I had. He loved me for me, and I loved him. It was a roller coaster of a relationship if you asked me. We had gone from barely knowing each other; to falling completely utterly in love. I gave up my kook card for him. I knew the obsluces we’d be facing now, the pogue’s vs the kook. But nothing made me question my loyalty to him. To the Pogues. It got messy with my dad; him being the reason Big John was gone. The reason why the gold was taken. The reason I was on the run with John B. The gold felt so close yet so far. We managed to clear John B’s name but that’s because Ward decided in his best interest to fake his own death and act like the hero. The guy that claimed to have been a killer in order to protect his own son. Rafe just the thought of being near him made me sick to my stomach. For a second I was upset, I felt like my whole body ached when I witnessed the boat blow up. When I witnessed my father shatter beyond the sea. And that’s when I saw the truth; what led to us being torn apart; what led to John B and I no longer being together. He had been happy to ward dead; and I couldn’t exactly find the words to blame him. He took everything from him. But at the end of the day; he was my dad. I was hurting and I remembered that look all too well; the look of proudnessI felt like I was seeing another person. I was grieving the dad I once looked up to, to the dad that I was once his princess. I needed John B to hold me, to make me feel like it was always going to be okay. But it suddenly felt like us it wasn’t meant to be.. 

Walking away for yourself; was all you could do. It was hard to be near him; to be pulled back into the adventure; to the cross. But for Pope I’d be there; awkwardness assured. Sarah didn’t know if she should make eye contact with him; or just stay silent. Silence seemed better; until that night; we had a plan to get the cross from Rafe; the big truck was parked outside my house. JJ and Pope were hidden behind the bushes. I was determined to walk inside; to get the key to unlock the truck; how we’d get the heavy cross out was a big ass story of it’s own. But I had made two steps to the gates, one glance backwards; I saw him John B was about to get up; and for a second I found myself hopeful; maybe this was the moment of the unknown. What comes next? Dark hues met for a second and I swore the air was taken out of my lungs; but he didn’t budge, didn’t move. Giving me the indication we had nothing left to say. That was the last memory I had of him; of us staring at each other. 

Head leaned against the gated up windows of my room at the barbados house, The house I was locked into. The boat felt like a nightmare; I was drugged by my own family. Rose had put a drug in my tea. Rafe and had helped her execute the plan; to force me here against my will. I remembered telling Ward when he claimed John B only cared about the treasure about the gold that I was just stuck in the cross hair that he was wrong. That John b would find him and come for him once I went missing. How wrong had I been? I wanted to blink back the tears that dared to fall. I was a pogue at heart; I chose it for John B because I loved him, despite our differences he’d always have a permanent place in my heart. It had been weeks since we left on the boat, I had tried to zone out the conversations of my parents; I had pretended to be sleeping at times, but here once I had been pulled into my room I never left. I guess Ward was afraid I’d run, or threaten to tell the cops his own daughter was kidnapped against her will. Give or take. Sarah swallowed the lump in her throat; it had gotten dark. She smelt the tray of food that her sister left her outside the door. Her bed was an inch away; The light pink covers still in place, it had been a day or two since we arrived, and I had slept in my bed because that meant i was okay, that meant that I was adjusting to being here; in this house. When all I wanted was to break free. At the window, on the seat where my back was pressed against the wall. Head tilted towards the window, I could see the water; any boats that passed by. I was alone; and all I could hope was that the Pogue’s were okay that perhaps my dad was right they managed to get the cross and that’s all that mattered for Pope. Eyes moved to the stars; for a moment it was nice to believe we were looking at the same stars; as if John B was on his way; assuming my dad was lying. For now all I could do was hold hope; I’d find a way out; it was a done deal. 

Tomorrow; I’d work out a plan. The Pogues would have me, if I found him. We’d always have each other. A wistful thought as a hint of a smile tainted onto my lips.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Love. Definitely not something I ever believe really existed. I always saw it more as, in life, people come and go. The ones who matter will stick with you, through thick and thin. For me, that was the Pogues: JJ, Kie, and Pope. I don’t remember a time in my life when those three weren’t part of it, and something tells me, I’ll never shake them either. Not that I’d want to, cause they’re everything to me. Then Sarah Cameron busted into my life unexpectedly… One of those surprising moments where I got myself in a sticky situation, and Sarah Cameron, of all people, was the one who bailed me out of it. Even more surprising though was how I felt when I was with her. It was the first time in my life when I found myself wanting to be with a girl exclusively. In time she even made me rethink my original theory about love. Then, well, I guess you could say life happened, and we broke up. Sure, I knew I played a part in our break up. When her father died, I should have been more supportive of the toll that loss would take on Sarah. Yeah, the guy was bad news… A lying crook, which Sarah obviously knew too, but he was still her father. Given the bad blood I had with Ward, and also the fact that he murdered my father, could you really blame me for being relieved that the guy was finally gone? Right or wrong, it’s how I felt. This leading to the end of Sarah’s and my relationship. Still, in my heart I knew this wasn’t the end for us. A love like ours always finds a way back to one another. Naïve or not, I refused to see it any other way…

Then weeks passed and I was starting to wonder if it really had been the end for us. Mind you, I still wasn’t giving up, but instead of dwelling on what may or may not happen between me and Sarah, instead the Pogues and I focused on getting the cross back for Pope. It actually became a, “Kill two birds with one stone” type of adventure for us though, since word got to me that Sarah had been abducted by her family. Them ultimately boarding a ship with Sarah and the cross, allegedly heading to Barbados; knowing that was exactly where we would be going to. This was it… This was our chance to, not only help Pope get the cross back, but also for me to rescue Sarah too…

Given that us Pogues had made some enemies, and also the fact that we didn’t have so much as a pot to piss in, much less money to travel to Barbados, it took some work, a lot of time, and even more creativity on our parts before we finally reached Barbados. Once we did, I knew we needed to devise a plan to get back both Sarah and the cross. Of course JJ, as usual, came up with one of the worst plans I had ever heard. This saying a lot considering JJ’s had some really shitty plans, over the years. This one pretty much topped the other bad plans he’s had though; prompting all of us to shoot down his plan and come up with another one. Knowing it was either come up with a better plan, or go with JJ’s plan which will likely either get us all killed, or at the very least, we’ll end up locked up in some jail cell. In time we did come up with a new plan. Not a great one, but definitely better than JJ’s plan, so it was something, at least. For our part we decided one step at a time…

We’d wait till night, rescue Sarah first, and then once we had her safely out of that house and away from her deranged family, we’d devise a plan to get the cross back. I mean, it’s not like we could just knock on the front door, and request either. Not without being shot, that is. We couldn’t even break in and steal the cross without getting caught, since it was so damn heavy, it was going to take a hell of a lot of brute strength to carry it, so we’d just deal with that plan later. For now, my focus was on Sarah. Sure, I knew there was a chance I’d be the last person she’d want to see tonight, but given me and the Pogue’s rescuing her, or her remaining a hostage with her own family, I figured I was the lesser of the evils, so to speak. I justified as Kie and Pope remained look outs from the ground; keeping hidden to the garden area where they tried to remain unseen, while JJ and I went to the roof. With JJ’s help, he hoisted me down onto the balcony I had scoped out and learned led to the bedroom they were keeping Sarah locked in. Once I approached the balcony window, I peaked inside discreetly; making sure her family was nowhere in sight before I gave a couple of light taps on the window. My way of alerting Sarah that I was here. Of course the window was pad-locked, which just pissed me off more. How could they do this to Sarah? The Cameron’s definition of family was nothing more than a load of bullshit, if you ask me, because this isn’t how you treat family. I thought in building anger as I used the pin I had with me to trigger the lock. Once I heard it click, my eyes shifted up toward JJ. The thumbs up he gave me in reply assuring me he had cut the security system like he confidently told me he could easily handle. This was JJ, so although I’d trust him with my life, and well, I had a few times, I still held my breath as I slowly and gingerly opened the window; expelling a quiet sigh of relief when an alarm didn’t sound as I opened the window] Val…? [I quietly whispered her code name into the dark bedroom. Hoping it would soften any resentment she might have in seeing me here now] Vlad and the crew are here to spring you from here… [I further whispered into the dark bedroom as I waited for her to come over to the window; knowing we didn’t have long before someone would alert the Cameron’s that the security system had been hacked into, so the sooner we got out of there, the better our chances of getting out of here alive]

[ofnotakook]

The pogue plans never went according to plan. Not that Sarah was going to complain now considering. She was able to escape the bars that locked her into her old bedroom. She was tired of starving herself out of spite. She was tired of laying awake at night in fear that she might be dragged out of bed. She was tired of being forced to live the perfect life. Forced to smile for her parents; the only one in her family she liked was her sister Wheezie, she’s who I wanted to protect. But she had young opinions, didn’t see what our family was capable of. And given how much risk John B went through to find me, I had to go with him. Not that I wanted to stay trapped or that I’d risk his life to save my sister. 

I felt torn with myself now. I escaped; I was on the roof; I had survived the lies, I had survived my own father aiming a gun at me; of course to his unknown knowledge Ward did exceed in his aiming and catching fire on one of us. I doubted his attention was to hurt me. Yet again it felt like a toss up considering, he did try to strangle me to death; and drugged me to get onto that stupid boat. But I knew him to know the problem wasn’t my stubbornness, it was John B and the pogues. He was threatened, and right now the Camerons wasn’t my family; it was the pogues. I had chose them a long time ago weather I wanted to admit it or not. 

Safe; is what I felt; despite the pain that was pooling on my side; the white sweater was making it difficult to hide. But I felt his kiss; the graze of his lips on my head, a tenderness of who we were. A love language for us. Seeing as JJ had followed my lead; and started down the ladder; I had stepped forward turning my back to where my hues fell on the male I loved with all my heart. Despite our differences that did come to light when I uttered the words maybe we weren’t meant to be, to work out. 

A soulfulness in my stare as I uttered my words. “ Promise you’ll come down.” I mouthed the words “ I can’t lose you.” As my palm wasn’t already filled with my own blood. Taking my hand from side, I placed them firmly on the handles of the ladder, with one step and than the next. I caught sight of the droplets of blood hitting the ladder as I climbed down, It wasn’t until I reached the bottom, I felt JJ; place his hand on my hip in order to help me off when he wore this stunned expression. “ Sarah.” He mouthed, I knew he felt it; the blood that now covered his hand; I shook my head. “ Don’t say a word.” I had strength I’d be okay until I couldn’t walk anymore; He was about to say something when I hit him in the chest. 

John B would be in earshot; I couldn’t tell him yet; once we were in the clear I’d tell him, but I didn’t want him to worry about me, not after all the risks he took to save me. Pushing myself to the side, I eyed the small area where our feet hit the grass; Kie and Pope had to make it to the gates; where it led to the waterfront it was our get away. Our only glimmer of hope.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I promise. I’ll be right behind you. [I assured Sarah as I watched JJ go down the ladder first, to ensure it was safe for Sarah to follow. Once JJ gave the “all clear” signal, I gave Sarah and nod to begin descending the ladder] You’ll be okay. JJ will meet you at the bottom, and I won’t be far behind. [I reminded her as she started to descend the ladder. I ducked down lower to the roof as I heard the sound of more gunshots looming in the air. Once Sarah was about halfway down the ladder, I started to position myself onto the ladder; getting a good grip on the sides before I slowly began descending the ladder too. It wasn’t long before I could faintly hear Sarah and JJ safely at the bottom on the ground below the ladder, and I was following them moments later. After I reached the bottom, I noticed the concerned look JJ was giving me, but assuming it had something to do with the fact that we were all still in danger on the Cameron’s grounds, I didn’t question JJ on his strange look. Instead, I snaked my arm gently and protectively around Sarah’s shoulder; gently tugging her closer to me before speaking up in a hushed volume] Okay, we made it this far, which is great, but we’re not out of danger yet. Let’s get to Pope and Kie, and then all of us get the hell out of here. [I suggested before nodding my head toward JJ; gesturing for him to lead the way. The sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better our chances would be of us surviving this]

[ofnotakook]

He’d be right behind me. It was a sense of comfort knowing I wasn’t alone.That I was nearly to safety but the question lingered of how long. Because I felt the bleeding on my hip, I felt the lost of blood that peeled from my skin. Not that Sarah was about to utter a word. If she did their plan of escaping would be jeopardized. And JJ and John B had risked it all for her. Kie and Pope were on the lower ground taking cover on her behalf. Sarah wasn’t selfish; she knew when to take one for the team. Her dad; his shots that were fired. It was venages for her; for the Pogues brainwashing her; but the truth was Sarah saw beneath the scars. She saw the truth. The perfect knit family wasn’t real. She had hoped her father would be okay; that he would let her go. Let the pogues go give John B what was rightfully his. 

But instead he saw me as property. I wasn’t a person to him. I was his daughter yes; but I also was my own mind and heard. All that to say I tried not to shake when I heard the gunshots in the distance. I had my hands holding onto the ladder as JJ slowly helped me down. Blood it was obvious at the edge of the ladder; I easily shook my head to JJ; indicating John B didn’t need to know. I was fine. I Swore I caught an edge of concern against his expression. Did JJ care? I asked myself as feet hit the pavement; the edge of the roof as we lowered ourselves down to the ground. His arm was comfort; he was there with me every step of the way. 

Reaching up with my cleared hand; I intertwined my palm with his own. Above my shoulder as I forced a smile. “ almost there.” I whispered as i felt the throbbing on my side; the dripping of redness down my leg; I just hoped it was dark enough to hide. Enough to give us a clear out before I had to say the words. I was shot; a haunting thought as I saw Kie and Pope in sight. 

“ Once we step down one last step, run to the gates, there’s a boat waiting okay. I’ll get the keys.” I told myself it was a solid plan; despite my obvious discomfort to myself. I leaned up to press a kiss to John B’s hand lips against his thumb before I gave the nod to Kie and Pope. 

It was time to run; it was our only chance; even if it meant the Pogues leaving without me; I could handle my injury and my dad; but John B needed an escape or his life was at risk; and right now I cared less about me and more about his safety. “ Run.” Whispered as hands released his own as my body heavily dropped to the ground. Shots being fired; I leaned down enough to swat; to hide under until the walkway cleared.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I gave a nod of relief to Sarah and JJ once our feet finally hit the pavement below. Sure, I knew we still had a challenge ahead of us, even more of one now that Ward knew I had taken Sarah, so I guarantee he wasn’t the only one firing a gun currently. Now we had him, and his whole damn security department firing at us, too. Regardless, we made it this far, which to some, seemed like an impossible feat in and of itself, but we’re still alive, so that’s something. I justified optimistically as Sarah told us the next part of the plan. Good thing we managed to get her out, because JJ nor I had come up with an escape plan. In normal pogue fashion, we planned to wing it once we reached the point… You know, assuming that we made it this far, I should say] Okay, babe. [I said as I heard her instruct us to “run,” and then she released my hand. Given how close I had already come to losing her, I wasn’t about to let her out of my sight; especially in a dangerous situation like this. With that protective thought in mind, I hadn’t run far before realizing she was no longer at my side, or even behind me] Sarah? Sarah, where are you? [I asked in a hushed volume as I started to back track to find her. It didn’t take me long before I nearly tripped over her as she laid down onto the ground] What are you doing? Are you okay? [Assuming maybe she tripped and hurt herself or something, which is why she didn’t get up and continue running with us. Either way, I waited for the latest bout of gun shots to fade out before I helped Sarah up from the ground. This time snaking my arm around her to keep her close as we prepared to catch up with the others] Can you walk? [Prepared to carry her on my back if she was hurt and couldn’t run. Whatever it took to get Sarah safely out of here, I was all for doing it. Sarah’s safety and freedom was my top priority right now]

[ofnotakook]

A getaway plan; honestly Sarah could easily say she had the grounds of the priority mapped out in her head. But the times she’s visited this house she could count on her hand. It was slim; but right now she had to save herself or she risked the chance of Ward getting his hooks not just in her; but it put the pogues in danger. The same people who risked their lives in order to save her. Sarah didn’t take it for granted; she knew she was a mess. She was someone who was torn between love and her family. But she was locked in her own room on more than one occasion. Her father proved he only cared about the gold. It stung; it made Sarah feel like shit; like she wasn’t enough for her own father. 

But now wasn’t the time; the end was near. She felt her knees wobbly, she felt the lost of blood elevate against her frame. Feet planted against the pavement; her eyes scanned the grounds until they reached Kie and Poper who had keys in their hands; they found the keys to the boat under one of my rocks. It was kinda my getaway car back in the day when I wanted to be reckless; I wanted an escape; apparently it was my younger self telling me to be prepared. Because right now our best bet was to run. Run through the pavements; the mountains of trees to get to the edge. I whispered the words. JJ didn’t need any admission; he ran like hell while guns were being fired. Fired at us; which is why I ducked. Not voluntarily; I had fallen to my knees. I had fell right to the ground. I felt my lungs closing off; I felt the air in my body slowly leaving, as I felt my frame hit the ground in a huff. 

I knew John B; he’d never leave without me. I was kinda surprised he hadn’t picked up on the trail of blood I left on the roof; the ladder in my wake. But to my surprise my secret was that a secret. Eyes closed growing heavy that was until I felt his hands roll onto my own palms. Fingers curled around his hands as I slowly pushed myself back onto my feet. “ I’m okay.” A fat lie I screamed at myself. The dirty blonde moved in the threes; in the brushes; her sneakers ran across the lawn until she heard her feet against the pavement. “ John B.. If I fall behind I need you to run like hell okay.” A demand not an ask. The female whispered in a low tone as fingers tighten around his palm. “ I was shot..’ The words stuck on her tongue as she paused; glancing down to her hip; her hip where there was a big ass stain of redness under her sweater; the white sweater now red; she bit down on her lip in fear; and now she’d be the reason they got caught; from running for their lives. 

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what, I would never leave Sarah behind. She was everything to me. Including my favorite pain in the ass that I argued with like we were already a married couple. Point is, I loved Sarah more than life itself, and even though things were a bit up in the open currently between us, that didn’t matter, because I would always come for her. Case and point when I saw her drop down and without a second thought or hesitation, I went back for her and then waited until she was ready to move before we continued our escape. My face turned pale though as I could feel the blood leaving my cheeks when I heard her confession about being shot] What? You were shot? [Quietly repeating the words back to myself, as if trying to process it, but also hoping that I had heard her wrong and she’d correct me now. Judging by the blood I saw that had stained her shirt, I knew I hadn’t imagined it. My worst nightmare was happening now in the fact that Sarah was hurt] It’s going to be okay. I’ll get you out of here and then we’ll get you help. [I assured her. No way in hell of knowing if she was going to be okay or not. I mean, she was shot. With a bullet. She was bleeding, and I had no way of knowing how much blood she’s lost already, because I was just now hearing she was hurt] Let’s get you on my back, and I’ll carry you out of here. [My way of letting her know that, no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her behind, so this way, if we get caught, we’re going to do so together. I silently justified as I squatted down as low as I could, so Sarah didn’t have to strain too much to shift onto my back]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s family was the why the Pogue’s were in this mess. The why we were fighting for our life’s. Namely the finger needed to be pointed towards my father. The man who wanted to be a proud family man, adoring father was willing to aim guns at his own daughter. He chose a hell of a long time ago. I wasn’t the kook anymore; I was a pogue; the family I decided I wanted. My pure love and adoration for John B. He was my everything. The boy I wanted to bicker with day and night. The boy I wanted to run on adventures with. He understood me, I never felt alone with him; I never felt like I had to pretend. I always felt trapped, the need to run from how I felt those strong feelings until I met him. Until we kissed; and fell insanely in love. 

And this island; the gold being unreachable now; was on me. I was the one who believed in my dad; kept opening my mouth and claiming he loves me, he’d never hurt me. I was the fool a disgrace not only had my brother tried to kill me drown me, my own dad wanted me dead. I had nothing but John B and the pogue’s. They were all I needed. 

Each leg of movement was starting to cause a strain on my body. I had no issues running; it was the open wound on my abdomen that was preventing me from moving fast enough. Knees weak, I could barely keep up. I heard the others in a distant reach the boat; the boat that was gassed up; the keys I knew where they were hidden the backup keys I mean. I remembered going out on this boat as a child; for our family trips on the ocean. What an embarrassing moment now considering. Leaning over my frame; eyes staring at the grass that touched my ankles. Head moving to stare between my legs in order to catch my panting breaths. I felt weak, I said the words. And I swore I heard John B stop; he paused in disbelief but the writing was pooling down my legs; the droplets of blood obvious. Tilting my head up I bit down on my lower lip to hold in the whine the pain of my wound. “ John B..” Name lingered on my tongue as tried to find the how I’d get this boy to leave without me. Instead he decided to bend down to the ground. I hesitated, I didn’t want to hold him back. “ I..” I started but I also know this boy; he’d risk it all for me. It didn’t make sense for both of us to risk being caught here, but with last minute thinking I pulled myself onto his back. Arms wrapped loosely around his neck. Legs wrapping around his waist, once I was safely on his back I rested my head on his shoulder. “ You can move now..” I echoed in a nearly teasing retort. Keep it light; until we escaped. 

A death trap of my own making.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what happened, I would never leave Sarah behind. I wasn’t stupid. I knew us breaking into her family’s compound tonight to break her out was a death trap. It was a fool’s errand, but I didn’t care. Sarah was in danger. She might not see how deranged her father and brother are, but I knew. I saw first-hand what her psychotic father was capable of, so I wouldn’t put anything past him now. Including him hurting his own daughter just to ensure he kept her far away from me. The man was a damn lunatic and the sooner I got Sarah away from him, the better off she’d be. The driving reason I broke into her room tonight. Well, “prison” was probably a more fitting word given the bars her father had put on her windows, so she could be kept there as his prisoner. Asshole. I thought in disdain as we ran toward some semblance of safety. I stopped though when I realized Sarah was no longer behind me. Panic setting in since it was dark, which made it difficult to see. Following the sounds of her breaths and rustling through the grass as I back-tracked back toward her. Shock and fear washing over me in hearing she had been shot. A part of me wondering if taking her back to her father was the best course of action, since his ties and pull could have a doctor here in moments. Still, something told me she wouldn’t want to go back there. She’d choose to take the risk to keep moving] I’ve got you. Don’t worry. I’d never leave without you, Sarah. [I assuredly whispered out as I helped her get situated safely on my back; ensuring her arms were wrapped tightly around my neck and her legs secured around my waist before I started through the trees and such in search of JJ and the others] “John B? Where the hell are you?” [I heard the familiar sound of JJ’s voice airing out nearby in a hushed tone. Moving in the direction of his voice, I eventually caught up with them. Keeping Sarah securely on my back as we reached them] “Ready for the next part of the plan? The diversion?” [JJ asked with pride in his voice, which prompted a skeptical look from me. All of us knowing JJ wasn’t the best at plans, but I did feel better when Pope and Kie chimed in to share that they had actually helped with this part of the plan] If it gets us out of here, then hell yeah, do it! [I muttered out as I watched JJ throw a lit flare in the direction of the wooded area we had all just escaped from, before throwing two others in separate directions of the same wooded area. Listening and watching as I saw a small explosion go off, followed by another, and then countless more. Pope and Kie explaining they rigged those while they were waiting for us to break Sarah out. Chuckling in pride and feeling a momentary sense of victory as I realized we temporarily stopped Ward’s guards from catching up; prompting us to continue running the remaining way off of the compounds and then into the city. Now it was just a matter of finding a place to hide out and to get Sarah medical attention] Sarah was shot, so we need to get her to a doctor before we do anything else. [I explained to the others; watching the wheels practically turning in their head on how to work this one out without all of us ending up getting caught]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s greatest fear was her friends, was the boy she loved getting hurt on her behalf. She always believed in the good in her father; that he had made mistakes. But when it came to their family he always held their best interest at heart. But all the evidence was staked against him. He faked his own death; he was okay with putting his arms around my neck. He was okay with shooting a bullet not knowing where it land. And Sarah was caught in that crossfire. She was scared that her now slow pace would hurt the pogues in the end. Her new Family. And she knew better than to fight with John B, than to plead with him to keep going without her. He’d never leave her behind. He was noble, he was the man that loved her more than his own life. 

And she’d risk it all for him too. He was the light in her new darkness. Sarah tried to hide it; the trail of blood she now kept behind her. She held the wound to her hip as tightly as she could; until she fell. She fell forward breathing heavily feeling the impact of loss blood. She was trying to move forward in the deep grass; but her feet stopped. She had hoped the male had moved far enough forward to forget; about her. But his voice was like a compass calling her home. And she had to smile to herself as she pulled herself onto his back. Bitting down on her lip knowing she was in pain; that pain in her side, the pool of blood that was now hitting his shirt. Head slowly came to rest on his shoulder; weakness inside of her. “ I know..” She whispered in a weakened tone. She held on for dear life; she had her arms wrapped around his neck, and her legs slid around his waist; a sense of safety; as we neared the spot where the others were. 

The night was dark; no one noticed her pale face; the weaken state she was in. Another phase to the plan? Her eyes trailed over to the smirks of her friends; the explosions that they had in fact thrown in the direction of each guard growing on their tails. A small smirk tugged at her lips. Severs Ward right, to come for family; and you get burned. The others glanced at her; as the elephant in the room was exposed. She was shot; weak; blood pooling out of her as she spoke. “ I’m fine.” She said as she rested her head back down on his shoulder. She vaguely heard JJ make a plan. “ We run into town. There’s abandoned buildings, maybe we find a doctor office on our way.” It wasn’t settle or optimistic in any form; but maybe if we found supplies; I could stitch up my own wound. I had no desire to see a doctor again; nor could we trust any person wouldn’t go running to Ward. So I had barely said a word; leaving the decision up to John B; he was the fighter; the leader in this mess. I’d trust him; I’d follow him anywhere.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I nodded in response to JJ’s suggestion. No offense to my best friend, or anything, but when he came up with plans, they usually crashed and burned. Then again, his idea to break Sarah out wasn’t his worst plan. Mind you, she did get shot as a result of the escape, but I don’t know if I can necessarily blame JJ’s plan for that, or just pin the blame on Ward for being a deranged and psychotic piece of shit] I think heading toward the town is a good idea, but Sarah definitely needs a doctor. Kai, you still have the fake IDs we had made up for all of us, right? [Kai nodded in response while flashing me a confused look] Okay, so if we go to a doctor’s office or hospital, we can use the fake IDs, so Sarah’s identity doesn’t get back to her father. Either way, we need to get the bullet out of Sarah, and get her stitched up. That’s our first priority once we get off of this property. [I explained. Knowing Sarah was getting weaker from the blood loss, so the sooner we got her gunshot wound tended to, the more at ease I would feel that she’s going to be okay. Honestly, at this point in time, my only concern was Sarah. I kept that thought to myself though, because I knew if I startled to unravel with worry, everyone else would begin unraveling too. Bottom line, we weren’t going to make it out of this situation alive if we didn’t remain level headed and make the right decisions]

[ofnotakook]

Right decisions; was it ever in our nature? To be smart, to not lead on impulse? In the short time Sarah spend with John B and the pogues, she’s learned JJ and John B tended to make decisions on a whim. They tended to come up with a plan and without thinking ran with it. Granted it Sarah owed her life to the poges, she owed the idea that she was released from the bars of her own bedroom due to them. And she appreciated the fact given the limbo state the male and myself were tethered into that they risked it all for me. The wrath from my dad; the Camerons’s who I was learning spelled terrible news. Sarah always believed in her dad; the type of man he was. He was kind, he cared about his family wanted to provide for us. But the money the power it gave a person it tended to steamroll you into a horrible person. Sarah couldn’t believe her eyes; the lengths her dad was willing to go, harming his own daughter, embedding Rafe despite his own crimes. She felt disgusted with her own family. The blonde knew where she belonged; where her heart was. Holding onto dear life to the man she currently had her arms wrapped around. 

The blonde let nimble fingers graze over the thin layer of his shirt; the weak grip she held. Her wound was obvious, the blood pooling down her leg. Ward got her damn good. And Sarah hated her fate was on the edge of a line. Doctors wasn’t an option, she knew this island. She knew Ward was probably on a warpath now for blood. Pogues won by letting my escape happen, and now he’d be paying off any source he could, to get his hands on me. 

The female listened despite her own body was fading, head rested upon his head; the comfort of his scent, she was always safe with him. Eyes blinked open and closed, and she slowly let her weaken vision take in the pogue’s who glanced in every direction Smoke of the explosion was all in the air, intoxicating. “ Go South, we get on the boat, and port half way down the island, there’s a hidden office, our best bets is escaping this house.” A thought for food; a hidden doctors office; one that may get me home sailing. 

Without the risk of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised that, in spite of her condition, Sarah was the one to air out the best and most sensible plan. Giving a nod in response as I looked toward JJ and the others] You heard her. Head south. [I said in agreement as I continued carrying Sarah on my back as we all made route south toward the docks. Knowing our risk was still higher than not of getting caught, but she was right… If we had a chance of getting out of here and to freedom, this was the one with the best odds. More than anything though, I just wanted to get her somewhere safe, so she could get some medical attention. I could hear by how weak her voice was that she was losing a lot of blood. The longer this continues, the worse her chances of survival were. Once we reached the docks, we ducked into the shadows until reaching the boat. I made sure to get Sarah on safely, and then I laid her down across one of the seats to rest, while I helped JJ and Pope to untie the ropes; all the while Kai started up the boat. Knowing we’d all need to work together, and to do so quickly, or else we weren’t getting out of here alive] Okay, Kai, we’re clear. Get us the hell out of here. [I called out to her as me and the other guys pushed the boat away from the dock to give it an oomph and then once the boat was cleared from the sides, I returned to Sarah] How bad is it? [I asked as I grabbed the first aid kit stowed under the one seat. Not that I could do much with my incredibly limited experience and knowledge, but I felt helpless by not doing what I could for her now. Besides, if I could at least slow the bleeding, that would give her the best fighting chance to stay alive until we were able to get her medical attention]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt like she had lost everything. She used to be the girl who would always go to the beck and call of her dad; he used to be the incredible man she grew up with. He used to be the man who read bedtime stories to her. He used to give her a glass of milk each time. She had so many fond memories of him. But now; it felt like those memories were tainted. Sarah had always believed in him, she fought the urges to go against him. Seeing his boat explode it destroyed her; she broke up with John B the man she loved for him, because he was glad the man who took his father away got justice. Was dead. And suddenly it felt like our love wasn’t meant to be. 

And now Sarah was bleeding out because of the man who was supposed to protect her. He shot fire at her; at her friends not caring of the consequences. That was the sadness of the reality. That I was alone. I couldn’t turn to my sister, I couldn’t protect. I had to put myself first, and that was the pogues my made family. We lift each other up, we go to bat for each other. And I knew the high stakes. I knew what my father was capable of. I had to wonder how I had any ounce of love for him after what he’s done. Lying to protect Rafe, letting my brother get away with attempting to drown me, he let me get drugged. He’d rather put harm to me than take accountability. And I had to swallow that truth. With a heavy head I felt like my vision was becoming blur as I spurred the last task at hand. Hands loosen on the grip against John B’s shirt, as my eyes drifted shut. How long had we walked? Before I heard the rustling of feet hitting the docks. And I felt my body being dropped gently into the boat, back pressed against a hard backing on the edge. Slowly eyes lifted seeing blurs. 

Figures moving left and right; the “ Ropes done.” I heard from JJ as both boys plopped themselves down on the boat. Pope was at the wheel with Kie, I heard the soft whispers of nothingness. And I heard his voice, the one that always dragged me home. And I wanted to be honest, as my hand slowly nimbly moved against the dam fabric of my sweater as I lifted it up. And I saw it the blood, it was dark, and it explained why I felt faint. Turning my eyes to the man I loved; John B was preparing to bandage up the wound for a short time. “ It doesn’t look pretty, I’ll have a nasty scar if anything.” I aired out attempting to lighten the mood as I felt the boat move as if it was full of lighten. 

This remembered me of when I saved his ass, when we first started out; on our little adventure. A shy grin turned against my lips as I spoke. “ Last time one of us had to bandage the other up, I was sneaking you into the house, I saved your ass, are we finally repaying the favor?” I asked with a sense of teasing in my voice. Definitely not the time, but I needed a laugh a small brief moment for just us.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Although I knew now wasn’t the time for jokes and quips, I still appreciated the fact that Sarah was trying to keep the mood light between us. Maybe if the circumstances had been reversed, I would have been all for cracking jokes… Hell, I would more than likely be cracking them too. Given that Sarah had been shot and was rapidly losing blood though, I definitely wasn’t in a fun and games kind of mindset. For her sake though, I did flash her a grin as I leaned down to press a tender kiss to her forehead] Well, I figured I owed you so it was high time I stepped up and returned the favor. Maybe next time you want me to save you though, let’s go with something that involves less blood shed and need for panic… Deal? [Giving it my best effort to joke in return. In the meantime I grabbed the first aid kit. My hand shaking slightly as I quickly fished around for some bandaging and things I thought I could use to stop the bleeding] Either way, I’m putting you in charge of keeping an eye on me to make sure I’m doing this right. I mean, doctor stuff is new territory for me so I’ll need the supervision. All that to say, eyes open at all times, okay? [My casual way of requesting to Sarah that I wanted her to keep her eyes open. Afraid that if she closed them and fell asleep, I might lose her. A thought that I couldn’t bear to consider as I started to do what I could to apply pressure to her wound and then applied some gauze and then bandaging too, all in an effort to stop the significant bleeding she was currently experiencing]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was well aware of the bleeding that now wasn’t the time for her humor, for her need to crack a joke open. But Sarah could see how scared he was; it was in his eyes. She was scared herself that she was about to take her last breath, by the hands of her own father. Ward had no idea she was assuming that he had aimed for her; she had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. Her own father pulled the trigger; he was aiming a weapon at her friends, at the man she loved. And now she was facing deaths door; she remembered the last time. 

John B was the one aching in pain as she ran her fingers with a cold rag over his blooded wound; which is why the dirty blonde showed amusement. Or she was going nuts with the lack of blood in her system. Eyes had slowed movement as he spoke; and she knew this was his way of saying “ Stop Sarah.” As if she planned on taking a bullet tonight. But her smile soften knowing feeling the panic under his tone, and her slimmed hand; her hand reached to touch his arm as a soothing of reassurance that she was okay. “ I promise next time, I’ll tell my dad not to shoot.” She echoed with that sarcastic retort of hers. But Sarah was done with the jokes. Not that she had the energy. She felt like her body was giving out; she felt the color had now drained from her face in the dark. She barely felt the boat moving against the water; the ocean seas; the seas that used to bring soothing. That used to make her feel safe; and now she was trembling, she felt his hand on her wound; and she had glanced down the blood was soaking her skin, right through his hand. “ Use the guse to wipe around the wound, and then bandage it gently at least until we arrive.” To a doctor; assuming we had the money to get me treated; or this was the end. Her eyes landed back on his features, and she uttered an “ I love you.” As if it was the last words she’d say. 

Eyes kept fluttering open and shut in a daze, despite the promise to stay with him, to guide him through the process; she hardly felt her hand move down to her side; as if her limbs were jelly now. If only this boat would move any faster..

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I appreciated Sarah’s attempt to crack jokes now. That was kinda our thing, you could say, but at the moment, I felt far from laughing. I was worried and growing even more so with every passing second. Sarah was shot. She was bleeding out currently, and I had no way of knowing if we’d get her medical attention in time to save her] Speed up the boat! Let’s go! [I yelled out to Pope and Kie as I saw Sarah’s eyes close. Judging by the worried look on JJ’s face, I knew he was thinking the same thing I was] Hurry the hell up, JJ, and help me pack her wound. Quick, get those gauze pads from the bag! [My voice shaking in building worry as JJ did as I ordered; grabbing me what I needed as I tossed the now soiled and blood soaked gauze pads to the side as I took the clean ones from JJ’s grasp. My hand shaking as I pressed it against Sarah’s gunshot wound. After what felt like a damn eternity, the boat pulled to a stop. I didn’t exactly know where we were at the moment, but at this point Pope and Kie were tying off the boat to the pier, so it wouldn’t go anywhere, and then they rushed toward us] “Come on. I got word that there’s a surgeon in town who handles cases like this for the right price.” [Pope explained which prompted my brows to furrow in confusion] “Get Sarah, let’s go.” [Kie instructed, which prompted me to tape off the currently gauzed padding I had in place, then JJ helped me to lift Sarah carefully out of the boat and onto the pier. Once JJ and I were on the pier, I cradled Sarah securely in my arms] “Here, take this bag. It should be enough to get her treated. Pope and I will stay with the boat.” [Kie said as JJ grabbed the bag and the address of the warehouse doctor, and then we rushed through the dark night air toward the provided address. A less than ideal situation from all angles given Sarah’s condition and the fact that we were in an unfamiliar place looking for the location of a doctor that we knew nothing about. Talk about a wild card move, at its best] Stay with me, Sarah. We’re going to get you help. Keep fighting. [I called out to her as JJ barked out instructions and I merely kept up with his pace as I carried Sarah in my arms toward our destination]

[ofnotakook]

A scar that might kill me. 

It was a thought for Sarah; she felt like she’d been through the ringer. Her own family was willing to sacrifice her for their own benefits. Sarah once thought the world of her father; of the family. But now she knew the truth they only craved the wealth they’d stomp on anyone who dared to stand in their way. Sarah’s own brother tried to drown her, and now her father was the one who pulled the trigger. Obviously he was aiming for John B, but Sarah knew she’d always end up in the cross fire. 

Not that she cared, she’d rather die than live without him. The words she said that night; on the smaller boat, as John B fought for his life, to escape the death sentence. And I meant it; I loved John B and yeah we fought; we ended up screaming at each other. But i’d do anything to be with him, and now as I was fighting for my own life; I only hoped the pogues survived. Sarah was falling unconscious, she had felt her body shutting off. The last words she spoke were of love, an undenying world of love for him. But she felt the blood lost. She felt her wounds becoming fetel. And she heard the urgent, the eagerness in her man’s voice as she felt the vague packing of her wound. How long had it been? 

She had no idea, because she felt darkness overcome her. She felt like she was falling into limo. She barely felt John B and JJ as they wrapped her sim arms around their shoulders and held her up. Enough to look like Sarah was walking, but she was dragged towards the clinic, and she barely heard the exchange when the surgeon called the three up. And with each step, she felt a slight ache in her body. An ache she wanted to subside. But Sarach knew she had to fight; to live, to open her eyes again. She felt her frame fall to a bedding; as her head hung down as the surgeon whispered. “ It’ll be okay, fight.” And She fel the breathing tube come to her nose, she felt the bleeding that was exposed. The doctor mumbled a few words to her friends. “ Do you have the money? She may not live.” He uttered and I felt my body weak. My own shadow breathing as my eyes slowly woke, for a second to see the unfamiliar surroundings, the walls brown. The tubes connected to me, I was scared. But I couldn’t move before my eyes went shut all over again. 

The doctor took the money and he soon took a tool; to save me, if it did any good, because right now I felt like I was on the brink of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

“Yeah, man. Here.” [JJ aired out in response to the shifty doctor’s request for money, before handing him a bag with money in it. My eyes shifted into a roll watching the doctor count it. So much for a moral code to save a life. Apparently all this asshole cared about what money] Just save her. Please. [I aired out pleadingly as I held Sarah’s hand with my one hand; all the while gently stroking back the hair from her face with my free hand. After a moment or so the doctor seemed satisfied with the amount of money JJ gave him inside that bag, and then he began. Watching as he first put Sarah under with what I assumed to be some kind of anesthesia before he grabbed a questionable looking scalpel so he could begin making the first cut. I knew in my gut that trusting this doctor might be the worst idea we’ve ever had, but at the same point, our hands were tied. It was either this option or we’d lose Sarah. Sure, his “she may not live” statement didn’t leave me with much confidence in his skills, but I had to believe in Sarah now. Sarah was strong. She was brave. If anyone could fight this, it was her] Come on, baby. Fight this. Don’t you dare leave me. Fight, baby. Fight. [I gently pleaded in her ear before pressing a tender kiss to her forehead] “Keep watch.” [I heard the doctor instruct of JJ before giving me a knowing sort of look and then a nod] “Here we go.” [The doctor said in less than a confident tone as he made the first cut; taking the scalpel across Sarah’s skin in order to remove the bullet from her body. It was excruciating to watch, but I promised myself that no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her side] “Grab those gauze pads and some gloves. Pour some of that vial with sanitizing solution directly over the incision spot and then place the gauze pads firmly across the area to slow her bleeding. We don’t want her losing more blood than she already has.” [The doctor instructed; forcing me to release Sarah’s hand, so I could assist in the surgery. After what felt like an eternity, he finished; managing to remove the bullet and then to seemingly successfully repair damage to her wounded organ internally. Once he finished, he stitched her up then covered the wound with a significant amount of gauze pads and medical tape] “It’s a wait and see, at this point, so let’s hope she’s a fighter.” [The doctor said while washing his hands in the sink in the corner of the room] She is. [I flatly said in response before removing my gloves and washing my own hands once the doctor had finished. After ensuring my hands were clean, I returned to the table where Sarah rested and I took her hand in my own] You’re a fighter, Sarah. The strongest person I know, so fight this. I’m not going anywhere. [I had no way of knowing if she could hear me, but I didn’t care. On the off chance that she could, I was going to remind her of her strength and ability to fight this now]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt the screams into darkness. She felt like she was on a cloud in limo. She had no control of her body; she felt like she was paralyzed. She didn’t have the power to move, she barely felt her body being held up. She didn’t want to die, she didn’t want to be traped in her own bedroom. She never asked her own father to shoot bullets at her and her friends. Sarah suddenly felt like her once simply life was a cycle of nightmares. Death on our door steps, the rush of running; being on the med. Sarah knew her getting shot was her fault. If she had just listened to John B weeks ago; that Ward didn’t have my best interest at heart. 

If I had stayed with Pogues instead of trusting my now psychic family. One trying to kill me left and right. Sarah had learned her lesson, the only people she could count on was herself, the pogues, even her sister she just hoped her sister was okay. She knew she was stipid to be thinking about anyone but herself now. But she held sympathy for others. The aching in her body was enough to force her to scream in pain if she wasn’t knocked out. She vaguely heard the way her body gently was placed down on a mental table.  I vaguely felt John B his breath in my ear as he tried to reassure me I was okay, I was a fighter. I was in my own little bubble. The darkness in my lids, the way my body was lifeless, especially as the doctor did insert his tool into my body, if I was awake I’d be screaming. I barely felt it; probably from the anesthesia. I couldn’t move, I had no idea how long I was out. I could vaguely hear the voices as the doctor echoed out it would be touch and go. Would I be surviving? Was I still bleeding out? Sarah felt the stirs in her mind as she laid still. Baby, fight.. Words echoed in my ears. 

John B, he needed me, he needed me to be strong, to fight through the blood lost. I couldn’t let him down. I was groggy when I suddenly felt the strength to open my eyes. The small light above me it flashed my eyes forcing me to squit, and I felt John B’s head on my stomach, not on the wounded skin, but right under. I was aching as I let out a soft wine. My hand pale as I lowered my hand onto his dirty brown locks, fingers slowly combed through his hair. “ John B.” I echoed in a whisper; I couldn’t speak and I noticed JJ was sitting in the chair, eyes closed, even JJ stayed. A made family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Hours passed by and there was no change. Sarah was so still and I had no way of knowing if she’d ever wake up. The doctor didn’t sound hopeful. Made a snide remark about her chances of pulled through as he greedily took our money and then ran like hell like some kind of coward. Clearly it was all about money for him. As more time passed, I found my head resting against Sarah’s side. Near her incision but not close enough to cause any further damage. I just wanted and needed to be close to her now. JJ wasn’t far away. He took a look out to make sure Ward nor any of his men were nearby before he’d return to the private room here and take a seat in the chair adjacent from where Sarah and I rested now. I didn’t know how much more time had passed… Felt like an eternity even though I knew it was probably just a few more hours, but eventually I heard the faint sound of her voice, as well as felt her fingers rustle gingerly through my hair. At that my head immediately shot up and I looked at her. Relief flooding my face and expression currently] You’re awake! Thank God! [I uttered out in evident relief as I pressed a gentle kiss to the back of her hand] How are you feeling? The black market doctor left a few things for pain if you need it. [The guy wasn’t exactly reliable but he did seem to save Sarah’s life, so at the moment, I was thinking a bit more favorably of him. Maybe he wasn’t a total money-hungry quack after all. Jury was still out on that one though] Do you want some water? [I asked as I had already picked up a fresh bottle of water; prepared to give her some if she was thirsty]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt weak, she ha no idea as to how long she’d been laying her. The memory of her father; of how easily he had aimed a gun at her, at her friends because of what? Jealousy? Because he wanted to hold this wild control over her? Sarah had once desired to please her family. She had once idolize her father the memory of us at the docks when I was only a little girl it clouded who I knew he was. 

But a few hours before he was so willing to throw me under the bus. He was so willing to let me bleed out on our yard. Because of his hate for the Pogues. I was hurt, I was feeling betrayed but at the same time, relieved as I felt my body come to life. I felt my eyes lift open as I adjusted to the dim light. I saw JJ in the corner as my eyes peeled over to John B who had his head rested against my palm. And I knew I was lucky, he was here. He loved me, and I had to let my fingers run soothingly through his dirty blonde locks. A small smile peeled at my lips. And I knew I couldn’t move. I felt numb to my core as my body was now healing from the blood lost, Sarah wasn’t going to jump up, the fear of Ward on our tail was aching against my own skin. The blonde had peered up at him; the man she loved so much. 

“ I’m okay.” As okay as I was going to be. The wound had been deep, the stitched up wound was felt as my eyes slowly moved to the man I loved. My hand moved to reach for John B. And I felt a sigh of relief escape my own lips. And I felt my gaze linger on him. “ I’m sorry, I’m sorry my dad is a crazy,” My words could never compare to the pain my family has caused him, the pogues and I wanted to do my part to mend those fences. “ Yes.” I echoed to the option of water my throat felt dry but I wasn’t going to jump forward, I slowly lifted my head up to get to a sitting position. My free hand had moved to my side, knowing the pain; the wound my own family caused.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I felt mounds of relief when I heard Sarah’s voice. She was alive. She was awake, and she was speaking. Lifting her hand to my lips as I pressed a couple of kisses to the back of her hand, then gently lowered her hand back down onto the metal table she was lying on] Hey, don’t apologize. It’s not your fault. All that matters is keeping you safe and away from your deranged family. [No matter what, I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t let Ward harm Sarah again. I thought to myself as I brought a fresh bottle of water to Sarah’s lips, so she could drink as much as she wanted and needed. I knew she needed time to rest and heal, but the sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better I could guarantee her safety from her family. One could hope, at least. I mean the way Ward operated, and the fact that he knew people all over the world, I wasn’t sure exactly how far remote we would need to go, and for how long either for that matter, in order to keep Sarah safe, but no matter what, I’d do what it takes. I came close to losing Sarah this time… Too close for comfort, so I wasn’t willing to take any chances with her safety again. At least not until Ward was no longer a threat to her] Once you’re well enough, we’re going to get you out of here. Pope and Kie are keeping an eye on the boat, and when you’re strong enough, we’re all getting on that boat, and getting as far away as possible. We figure with some distance and preferably some place off the grid, eventually your father will stop looking for you. [Maybe wishful thinking since Ward wasn’t one who took well to losing, but one could hope he’d eventually give up and accept that Sarah was gone]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah kept asking herself the obvious how she’d been blind. How she was capable of still holding a torch of love for her family. With all the crimes all the ways her own brother tried to murder her; sending drug mules her way, being the one that nearly drowned her to death. And now her own father; was so mad at the Pogues so terrified of losing his daughter to the pogues; not wanting to lose the fight that he aimed and shot me. The blood that once covered her fingertips, the blood the redness that ran over her sweater, it was an image Sarah couldn’t erase.  

Her friends, her boyfriend? Cut into the crossfires because of her fucked up  family. And even now as she opened her eyes; said a few words, she felt the aching on her wound, damn that stitch is gonna hurt like hell. But it was comforting to feel his touch, to witness his lips touching her knuckles once again. John B, he was her anchor that kept her whole. A soften expression; a smile curled at the corners of her lips as she saviored his touch; his lips against her skin. “  They drugged me, they forced me here. I feel trapped like no one is safe in that house, but my sister..”  A fear for the little Cameron it rocked me whole now, as I felt the lump forming in my throat. Wheezie she was innocent had no idea who’s roof she was living under. Like myself; I’d been blinded from the truth. But now my father was deranged; he passed off onto Rafe; and Rose was clueless as ever a pond in the game; until she crossed Ward. 

A slight cough was heard; as the blonde felt the wetness hit her tongue, one sip of water turned into half the bottle until she released the top from her lips and she slowly sat herself up, her palms hitting the metal of the table to hold herself up. Nuts insane considering her own wounds she wore. But her eyes ran along John B’s features with ease. “ You know he won’t let that happen. He blames you the pogues for his princess no longer being in his care. I’m a game for him to win..” A sad truth, an ached formed in her chest now.  “ I wouldn’t blame you if you allowed the pogues to leave me here for  dust to get away. I don’t want to bring you down, or put you and pogues in danger..” Not again the words hid  at the tips of her tongue. 

Danger; our names, but Ward he’d kill to end the war..I was terrified the lengths he’d go no matter how safe I felt with John B; he’d get hurt because of me. A pill I needed to swallow now.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, that would never happen. [I flatly replied with a matter of fact sort of shrug. Sure, I knew if this was just about Sarah, maybe JJ and the others would have high-tailed it out of here. Not necessarily Pope since he had a heart to do the right thing, but Kie was what you could say, hot and cold toward Sarah, so it wouldn’t take much for her to bail on Sarah. And well, JJ hated Kooks in general, so he had no loyalties to Sarah either. Thing was though, they all knew I’d literally die to protect Sarah, and the Pogues would always put their lives on the line to protect each other. All that to say, as long as I was staying put at Sarah’s side, the Pogues wouldn’t be going anywhere either because they’d always have my back, just like I’d always have theirs too. We fought fiercely for each other] Even if the others decided to high-tail it out of here, I’d never leave your side. Unless you tell me to go, I’m not going anywhere… [I started to say before an amused smirk followed] And even then, I can’t promise I’d actually leave. You know I’m stubborn when people try to tell me what to do. [I teased even though that was the truth] Either way, once you’re well enough, we’re all getting the hell out of here, and getting to safety together. Until then, just rest and heal. [I said as I gave her hand another gentle squeeze. My way of reassuring her that we were all in this together; no matter what the outcome]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah knew her choices  as of late not only disappointed herself but those around her. Sarah never wanted the wealth, she never wanted to be accepted as the princess Kook. That title had been given to her. People made assumptions about her; her personality; how she followed the kook business, and yes once upon a time she was a kook. Bu from that one day running around with John B at chapel Hill, helping him seek answers to a quest she had no idea how over our heads we were. We were just kids running around aimlessly. But I saw that treasure hunting look in his eyes; the way his eyes lit up at a map, and I mused, I admired who John B. And he made me want more for myself. 

One day; one rain kiss on the docks was all it took for the dirty blonde to feel hooked. He’s who she loved, and even with death upon us; my dad probably having a search squad on our heads. I had let the pogues down; when I had let John B go, I was angry, I was sad when I thought my dad died, and john B was just so glad to see him fall through the cracks. My dad was money hungry, he was awful he killed, he allowed Rafe to get away with Murder, but he was my dad; but now as I groggily came out of my unconscious state; I remembered the cage I felt locked in. I recalled his aim, the gun shot wound that should’ve killed me. My own father aimed the trigger, and right now Sarah knew in her gut she was a pogue, and she appreciated the friendships she made. Eyes glanced over for comfort to the boy that made her heart race. And her pinky found his; a trace of her finger against his own. 

“ I made that mistake once, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for letting you go John B, I was..” Pausing briefly before a sigh could be heard escaping her lips. “ I was hurting, I didn’t want to believe my dad was this monster. I know you said you’ve always got me, but I wouldn’t blame you if you decided no one chances.” Chances to love me, to be together after this horror war my dad had, all the times guns aimed at us because of him, a war he wanted to win on behalf of me. One he already lost. 

Because my heart; who I was, it was a pogue; my known family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I get it, Sarah. Before I came into your life and opened your eyes to who your dad and brother really are, you had a really tight bond with your dad. Naturally you’d want to fight to protect his reputation. It only makes sense that you wouldn’t want to believe your dad was capable of something like that. If the situation was reversed, and it was me in your shoes, I probably would have done the same thing as you. [I admitted honestly. It was the truth. If this was my dad, I would have fought to protect his reputation too. It’s what you do for the people you love. I’d do it for Sarah and the pogues too because I consider them my family. No matter what, I’d always have their backs, just like I know the pogues would have mine] You’ll never run out of chances with me, Sarah. I hate to break it to you, but I love you, so until you say otherwise, you’re stuck with me. [As much truth as there was in my words, I aired out that honesty with a joking tone] Anyway, for now, we just need to get your strong enough that we can move somewhere safer for the duration of your recovery. [I knew where we were would suffice for now, but it would only be a matter of time before Sarah’s dad figures out we’re hiding out here currently. We’d cross that bridge if and when the time comes. For now I wanted Sarah to get a little stronger and heal up a bit before we decide to move her]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah had always been privileged growing up. She knew of the different layers of the island. She never wanted to believe in herself to judge others; the living, how some had to work harder than others. But Sarah was guilty to pulling away when it felt messy and difficult. When someone got too close to her; she was the one guilty of running. The fear of being seen truly. It’s what happened with her friendship with Kie, and it was easy to blame the split on how John B reacted to her father’s then death. But the truth was Sarah was scared. 

Scared of letting go of the shielded life she lived, the ground beneath her gone. Her family shattered into pieces. Her dad wasn’t the man she once admired. He was a monster; he felt threatened he knew I wasn’t under the spell, and he tried to hurt me. My own brother tried to kill me, did I feel safe with my family? No I was shot because of my dad, and now I felt the numbness against my skin. The numbness that tingled the layer of my stomach; where the scars stood. I wouldn’t blame John B if he wanted to cut loses here, and leave me stranded. But I knew him his heart; the good boy inside of him; the boy I loved with every fiber inside of me. “ It’s not about him anymore. I knew who he was; he wasn’t the dad I once laughed with on the beach when I was a little girl, he knew he lied, he knew what he did, and my brother is protecting him. I’m sorry for the pain my family caused you.” The pogues hanging onto my lips. 

Hearing the words; unlimited chances hung in the air. I love you; and I loved him, I wouldn’t let the male get away from me again. Sarah tried her best to master the pain, the smile heated against brims as her hand grasped hold of his fingers. “ I love you.” words spoken as the blonde attempted to sit up using the strength of her elbows to hold her upper frame upright. But she knew staying put wasn’t an option; Ward had his minions surroundings areas; I would gasp through the pain than get caught. An intense stare hinted into my features as I spoke. “ John B.. we have to move. I can handle the pain. This island isn’t safe not with my dad, he has people..” And I knew Ward; he wanted power; to hold an angle, and us staying still didn’t feel safe; for me or the pogues.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I knew Sara was right… We had to move sooner rather than later. We were basically sitting ducks here. Ward had this whole island in his pocket, so it would only be a matter of time before he got wind of the fact that we were here. I’ll be damned if I did all this work to break Sara out of there… And then to get her the help she needed after she got shot, just for that deranged idiot to take her back to the prison he had her encamped in] Okay, if you’re sure you can handle it, we’ll move. [Worried if she busts a stitch she may bleed out though] We need to take it slow though. Be smart about this. We can’t afford you busting any stitches. If you bleed out… [I trailed off. Not even able to finish off the thought of that possibility] Let me tell JJ we’re going to move. [I said as I pressed a kiss to Sara’s forehead; letting my lips linger there for a second or two before I broke away. It was almost like I didn’t want to let her out of my sight; fearful I’d lose her] Be right back. [I promised as I briefly and reluctantly left the table she was resting on in order to find JJ, who was keeping watch just outside] We’re moving. We need to get off of this island. Alert the others. [JJ agreed; immediately pulling out his phone to message the others to get the boat ready for our momentary departure. In seeing JJ got the ball rolling on that, I returned to Sara. Preparing to move her once she gave me the okay. I still felt unsettled about us leaving, but at least night had set in, so that would give us the advantage as we used the darkness, shadows, and any alleyways we could find to our advantage] Just tell me when, and I’ll help you off the table.

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was embarrassed of who her family was now. It used to be a loving home, used to be a place of safety. The countless family dinners outside on the docks by the grills. The countless boat rides we had. The loving embraces from her dad; he used to be a home for her. And now when she thought about Ward all she felt was anger, betrayal. Someone who only cared about greed, he went out of his way to coverup a death, to frame John B, and now he even if it was an accident he shot me. I was stitched up because of him. All that to say; I didn’t want to be stuck on this island for one more minute. I was on edge, my hand touching the bandaged wound, as I felt the pain. We’re sitting ducks; Ward had his minions all over the island; it was possible he’d be hunting me down. This was a lowkey office; and I doubted this bystander of a doctor was on the payroll. 

I was aching, I didn’t want the drugs, but I also had to put the pogues first; John B first. They came to Nassau for her, Sarah didn’t care if she was limbing in pain whimpering as she sped up to walk as long as we ended up on that boat and made our way back to OBX a home, a new safety. We’d find a way to the gold; our rightful place of earnings. Sarah could see the concern written on John B’s face now, but she was okay. A smile of reassurance coming from her now. She laid kept on the metal table now, as she nodded, biting down on her lower lip to hold out on any pain. “ I promise, slow and steady wins the race.” I added with a joke, Sarah found her more humours side with him. The touch of his lips on her forehead, it made her insides turn, the butterflies now. Sarah had waited until John B had stepped outside to inform JJ before she was able to slowly sit back up. Damn the shooting pain that ran up her side. Deep breaths, Sarah was about to move to step down from the table when she heard her boyfriend, A soft brave smile came to her lips. Reaching out her hand to grasp hold of his arm for support. “ We need to move. I’m ready.” Her stitching may not be; but I could rest once we got safety; but until the docks came into view the dirty blonde wouldn’t feel at ease. 

An unsettling feeling at the pit of her stomach.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised the second I offered my help to Sarah once she was ready, she didn’t hesitate to take my hand. Anybody else would be feeling sorry for themselves and their situation, but not Sarah. She was a total bad ass. By far, the bravest person I knew. Thing was though, I hated moving her. She nearly bled out and died after being shot. Her stitches were the only thing keeping her from doing so now, so what she needed more than anything was to rest and heal. Problem was, her deranged father and his entourage of employees that would be on the look out for us. I didn’t like having to move her from here, but it was either this, or get caught by her father’s people. Neither outcome was ideal, which was why I left the final choice up to Sarah. Her answer clear as day when she held out her hand and took a hold of my arm for support] I can carry you. I’ll do the whole slow and steady thing… Taking your word on the winning the race part you joked about. [Flashing her an amused grin. Knowing now wasn’t the time for fun and jokes, but maybe we both needed a little light humor given the shitty circumstances we were facing. I silently told myself as I helped her off the metal table she was lying across and then kept a secure hold on her until she was steady on her feet] You good? [Needing to know she was okay before I made any further movements or plans]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah should’ve been more hesitant to move. Given the amount of stitches her body had to have, the amount of blood she had lost from that gunshot. The one that came from her father. Sarah if she had too much time to dwell on it would start feeling useless a burden to her own family. Because one her dad was willing to lie for Rafe, yet the innocent child like myself was left to scrape by. Pick a side, and my heart was with the pogues, with John B. And my brother was a bit deranged now, but I suppose father like son, Rafe had to get that attitude from somewhere didn’t he? 

I fought the urge to roll my eyes now. As I found that strength to lift my body up to sit and reach my feet the white tennis shoes to the ground. And I did and felt that aching pain on my lower abdomen. Where the stitches were, and as John B came to view I wore a gentle smile as I reached to brace myself for the pain as I put the weight on my feet. Fingers wrapping around his forearm you felt his muscles now as I found my courage to fully stand. “ I don’t want to make it harder for you to run, I’ll try to keep up.” A promise to my heart, but if John B and the others got hung up because of me I’d never forgive myself. The pogues were in a tough spot because of me. And I hated it, I’d rather bleed out on that table than for them to get caught. All that to say, my hand slid into his bigger palm with a squeeze. “ I’m ready, let’s meet the others.” Conviction in my tone as with an easy step started towards the exit doors; to leave, before my dad found us, before we felt in hot waters.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, I don’t want to run the risk of you popping one of your stitches and bleeding out, so we’ll take it slow and steady. Hell, if we have to crawl there to keep your safe, then so be it. [Mind you I didn’t expect either of us to crawl, obviously, but I was just trying to prove a point now. No matter what risk came to me, Sarah’s safety and well-being would always be my top focus. I silently thought to myself as I gave her hand a gentle squeeze] I’m good carrying you if that will be easier and less painful than you having to walk. [Fortunately the pier wasn’t far from here, but the problem was, we couldn’t exactly walk right down main street to get there since Sarah’s father, no doubt, had people out there looking for us. Nah, we needed to take the most discreet way possible in order to keep ourselves from getting noticed before we reach the boat that would hopefully get us the hell out of there] JJ’s right outside waiting for us… He’s already figured out a plan with the best route we should take to get to the pier where the boat’s waiting for us. [I explained as I securely and protectively held her close to me as she got on her feet; giving her a nod in reply as she gave the “okay” that she was ready] Walking or do you want me to carry you? [Knowing Sarah had an independent side to her so I figured I’d leave the decision up to her]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was fierce and strong. She felt the harbor of why us Pogues were on the run now. It was due to my father. Who had once been the apple of my eye, once been a dependable man. Once been someone I counted on, but he was the one who shot that aim. And landed me fighting for my life. Sarah was scared not that she’d say the words. She was scared of popping her own stitches now. Scared of taking a last breath. And John B he was by my side; he was a good person, even if I got angry with him from time to time. 

“ I’m okay.” An insistent of words. I’m fine. I definitely felt the wound, I felt that skin split when I stood up onto my feet. But i figured if i said the words long enough they’d be true. Sarah was a fighter; she tended to jump into the line of fire without care. And in this case; the pier wasn’t far, her idea of the island she knew it from the back of her head now. And Sarah wanted to be a leader; she wanted to feel empowered to get us pogues out of this mess. And as she stood to her feet; she nodded with a smile, genuine and sweet for him, as her hand laced through his own. “ Okay, but are we sure JJ’s plan is the best? He tends to have outcomes that come knocking on his door..” A grossome expression on her features now, as her hand made its way to his arm, as she prepared to jump on his back. “ I would love to walk John B, but my stitches, my pain level is a 10 right now, so carrying me is best..” Assuming the offer stood. I knew John B he wanted me to be comfortable. 

I was independent by nature, I had my own strength but even I felt that lower pain each time I moved, pick battles and right now I just wanted to be off my feet, and in his arms. A smile a batting of eyes now as I slowly hopped on his back legs wrapped around his waist to prepare for our trip, to the docks, to our ride home.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Eh… [I shrugged slightly in response to her question about JJ’s plan. It was a fair question. JJ was one of my best and most trusted friends, so I’d have his back no matter what, but with that aside, even I couldn’t deny that his track record with his plans working out wasn’t the best. In fact, they failed more often than not. This time around, it seemed like our only option, so even if the odds weren’t necessarily in our favor, we had to give it our best shot] It’s not a great plan, but unfortunately our only option currently. [I confessed. Knowing I couldn’t ever lie to Sarah] In his defense, this seems to be one of his better and more thought out plans, so fingers crossed. [No, that answer wasn’t ideal, or even all that convincing, but again, I couldn’t lie to Sarah. That’s how I felt, so it was a run like hell and hope for the best type of plan right now] Okay, I’ve got you. No matter what. [I assured Sarah as I carefully lifted her up from the floor and into my more than capable arms; cradling her protectively close to me as we cautiously exited the warehouse, met up with JJ who was keeping watch for us right around the corner, and then we started toward the dark alleyways and vacant roadways in an effort to go as unnoticed as possible as we raced like hell toward the boat where the rest of our friend group was waiting]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah had leaped into the pogue life. She had leaped into the trust for John B. She was back to stepping outside of the bubble wrap. It was rushed up adrenaline, it was the adventure, but in this point in time Sarah was scared. Her father had shot at her; the man she once thought stood on a pedestal was the man responsible for her injury. The blood stain through her sweater, the man who put gates over her windows to prevent her from leaving. He grew up on the cut, he transformed his life; he had wealth now. I once admired him, but now when I thought of his face I felt this twirling in my stomach as if my stomach was dropping. 

I was achy, my lower abdomen was in pain, the drugs, the stitching was only going to hold for so long. I knew JJ his lack of track record had spoken for themselves, and I saw that not so trusting expression cross the male’s face even for a split second. But as we established out time was limited before the streets would be swarming with guards, with police, as my father as the huntsmen. I had to swallow any doubt I had, and believe in the only option us pogues had. With a short less than confident bob of my head, the blonde had slipped her arms around John B’s neck, leaning her head on his shoulder, the comfort of his hold. And She wrapped her slander legs around his waist once her grip was in solid ground, she braced herself for the race against time. 

Alleyways with the boys, the short cuts and I had pointed ahead to the marina, where I knew our little boat would be waiting. “ Just straight ahead.” I whispered as if I once grew up here; on this soil summer nights at the beach, late nights on the boats enjoying the sun going down, watchful moons. And now we’re running away; to where? Outer Banks which was once paradise on earth. Hearing from the distant alarms rang off in my head. 

Cops? Worrisome laid out on my face. Let’s hope the others had the rope in hand and ready to back into the ocean the second we landed on the boat.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

No matter what, we’ll figure it out. That’s one thing about the Pogues… Are track record and planning aren’t always great, but we always find a way to get our asses out of trouble. [I joked. Not that this was a time for jokes or quips but I figured Sarah wouldn’t mind the a slight break from the stress and obvious worry she was feeling currently] Besides, when plan A doesn’t work, we’ve got like twenty-five other letters to work through. [I said optimistically while a smirk creased my lips. JJ leading the way; pausing briefly to as we came to openers to make sure nobody was around to catch up before he’d signal with his hand for us to continue] We’re close… [I murmured more so to myself in relief as I saw the waterway approaching. I was eerily confident that if we could make it to the boat without getting caught, that’d we’d be home-free to get the hell away from this island. Sure, I knew it wouldn’t be as easy as I was optimistically trying to write it off as, but I wasn’t anything if not hopeful. Besides, I couldn’t let anything happen to Sarah, so I’d do whatever I needed to in order to get her out of here safely]

[ofnotakook]

Which was true. All joking aside, the pogues had a way of wording or acting themselves out of trouble. The amount of times they’ve nearly gotten themselves thrown in jail and survived. Sarah wasn’t worried about the backup plans, nor was she concerned about putting her trust out in John B. Because she’d trust him with her life. 

It was the sirens, it was alerts that kept cycling through her head. Her fingers held tightly onto John B she swore he felt her grip through his shirt. All that to say, Sarah was nervous. She also knows the island, and her father. He didn’t do well with losing, and when he didn’t have the princess Kook on his side; it was safe to say the man got nervous. And the dirty blonde wasn’t a trophy to be tossed around. Sarah was smart, had her own mind. And this game, this idea that he could steal from the pogues, fake his death it rubbed her wrongly. “ I trust you.” Was all the female was able to muster. Before the crashing of waves were heard, the docks in the clear. I spotted our little boat, the pogues, as Kie waved us over. Leaning my head closer into his neck, I pressed a small kiss to his neck as I leaned my face into him, a smile blossoming on my lips. 

Home free, and as our shoes hit the dock, inches away from the rope of our friends, I spotted the police car, a horn sounded to stop. “ Go.” I said as I aired out with urgency, because it was run or flight, and there’s no way my injury was for nothing. 

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I couldn’t help but to smile when I heard Sarah confess that she trusts me. It boded well for me that she did because let’s be honest, our plans were far from successful the majority of the time. Let’s hoped this latest plan wouldn’t be one of those failed missions. Either way, though, I wasn’t going down without a fight. Especially knowing I held Sarah’s life in my hands right now, too] I got you. [I replied reassuringly as I heard her urgency for us to go. At that, I didn’t hesitate to pick up my pace toward the boat where Kie was waving us down. JJ got into the boat first, then offered his help as I carried Sarah and I into the boat. Fortunately for us, Pope had already started up the boat] Everyone lay low… Let’s get out of here without anyone seeing our faces. [I instructed. It was a fifty-fifty shot that someone would recognize Pope, Kie, or JJ, but Sarah and I definitely needed to keep ourselves low and out of notice at all costs. We were close now… About to put some necessary space between us and Sarah’s father, so we couldn’t blow it now. I thought to myself as I grabbed some towels I found on the floor of the boat and covered Sarah and I with them as Pope put the boat into gear and worked to get us out of this harbor as quickly yet subtly as possible. The key now was to avoid bringing any unnecessary attention to us so we had to remain low and act as naturally as we could]

[ofnotakook]

Our relationship may had felt on the edge of late, the split heavily on our minds, a lack of empathy, a lack of care to others feelings. But when push came to shover John B was a protector, he was someone I trusted to keep me safe, that I was in safe hands if I wasn’t able to take care of myself. Her father used to be an important person to her; but every time we spoke now it was like talking to a wall. He only cared about the gold the money he stole from the pogues. Sarah didn’t believe a word Ward said, plus he locked her up like she was a prisoner instead of his own daughter. Not to mention her little sidekick the bandage on her lower hip was a gift from dear old dad. 

Her family wasn’t hers anymore, it was unhinged, unsteady. She was nearly killed by two members of her own family, blood shed it stayed with her, as fear now built inside of her. Sarah wanted safety, and as she heard the reassurance in the male’s voice her arms securely tighten around his neck as he ran like hell to get to the boat. The roared engine of the boat was faith, With her body slowly hitting the deck of the boat, she quickly laid herself down against the floorboards, towels came down on top of John B and herself; eyes pried on us. Yet our friends no attention was drawn upon them. Sirens getting closer as she felt the boat movement, her hand instinctively had reached for John B under the towels, as a deep breathing of exhale came and went. 

Pope behind the wheel as the boat moved from the dock, JJ being JJ you could hear his own amusement as he aired out “ Have a great day.” To the officers I assumed and you could hear Kie swat his arm of disappointing nature. A roll of my eyes under the towels now, as we waited for the call; the indication we were safe. Our boat swayed against the ocean blues, swiftly. All we needed was a sign; ensure the threat was in our rearview mirror.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I flashed JJ an amused smirk and a head shake when I heard his cocky remark to the officers while you could practically hear Pope’s heart pounding rapidly as he pushed firmer on the throttle to get more distance between the boat and the marina. None of that mattered now though. Sarah was safe… At least for now, and I fully intended to keep it that way. Now it was only a matter of reaching a place where we could get Sarah the medical attention she likely needed, but her father and deranged family wouldn’t find out about it. More than anything, I just wanted Sarah and the others safe. Her father knew a lot of people though, so it was going to be a challenge, to say the least. Given all the challenges and hell the pogues have been through over the years, I was confident we had this one too. Let’s hope my confidence would pay off this time around]

[ofnotakook]

The rapid sounds of her beating heart. The worry, the fear that we’d be discovered. The towels were enough to cover when our bodies felt stiff, down low, the hardness of the boards of the flooring of the boat hitting my back. My body was aching, we just ran like hell, Well more like John B did, the champ he was. Sarah felt guilty for the position john B, the man she loved was in, and the pogues her found family. 

Ward, he played the act well. He played the act of a loving father who would bring no harm, and as a little girl I laughed with hm, I hugged him and felt safe. And now as I felt that obvious weakness in my lower abdomen, I felt like I had no idea who he was, the lengths he was willing to go to win. I had vaguely listened on to JJ and his smart remarks, not to mention Pope who obviously was exhaling deeply. Once I had felt the tug at the bottom of layers of towels, Kie had whispered “ Your good, we’re far enough.” And I didn’t know i was holding my breath, that I was a near wreck of fear until the confided space, until the material was lifted off my face and I exhaled. I looked up at the blue skies, and I turned to John B, my hand had reached over to brush against his. “ Thank you, all of you. “ And I knew I had come up short here and there the conflict between the pogues and my family; but I was confident i’d be welcomed back with open arms. 

Slowly sitting up, I had held the bandaged wound as I exhaled to avoid a whine on my lips. “ I’m sorry my dad my family are assholes, but I am on your side, and i’ll do whatever we have to do to get that upper hand again.” As to where this landed us, not a clue. Because the cross was gone, the gold gone, us on a boat my family’s boat might I add, sailing the ocean, and no idea where we go next. A forced smile on bare lips. What else could go wrong?

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Once Kie called that the coast was clear, we peeled the toweled off of us. My eyes immediately drifted to Sarah in concern. Aside from her rapidly beating heartbeat, which at the moment, I could also relate to, she seemed to be okay… Well, “okay” being a vague definition currently since she was just shot a short while ago] Hey, you’re more Pogue than you are Kook, and us Pogues take care of each other. [I reminded her. I knew JJ always bounced back and forth with this one. One minute he was consider Sarah one of us and seemed accepting, and in the next he was reminding me who her family is and I’d be smart to cut her loose. Knowing JJ, he’d weigh in at some point on how he felt about all of this. Sure, I’m guessing he enjoyed the rush of breaking her out, getting shot at, and then running for our lives, but he’d also probably harbor some bitterness since he’d blame Sarah for us having to do that in the first place. No matter where he stood, Sarah was in my life, and as long as she had me, I’d be in hers too, so like it or not, JJ would have to come to terms with that] “We can’t pick our families. Trust me, if we could, I’d choose literally anyone but my own father to be my father.” [JJ said in response and I nodded agreeably. The point being, it wasn’t Sarah’s fault. She couldn’t help that her family was deranged] You’re safe now. We all are. That’s what matters. [Were we though? Would we ever be fully safe knowing Ward was still out there? The man didn’t like to lose, and we just took his daughter from him, so I had a sinking feeling it would only be a matter of time before he struck again]

[ofnotakook]

Fear peeled out at you. Fear was the emotion that controlled you to stay. And Sarah wasn’t scared of her father, she wasn’t scared that he was the one who shot her. She wasn’t scared that Rafe had once attempted to drown her. Her family was deranged because of fear, fear that she’d talk, that she’d turn on her own family. But the guilt the pressure she felt on her chest, was for John B and the pogues. They got caught in the crosshairs because of her; because of her family. 

And even as she found her heartbeat steadying out now; the female was slowly standing to her feet slightly wobbly. Was it from the active moving boat? Maybe or it was because she felt unsteady. As she had her balance now, she smiled to herself; because despite it all, John B still considered her a pogue, and she felt her hand into her pockets, where she felt that sting of his bandana, the one she had gotten back outside her massive house; and she offered a delighted smile to him as she held out the bandana to him; and she asked the obvious “ Want to do the honors, A pogue for life?” It for a second felt as if we were in a bubble, like JJ hadn’t been speaking to me, about our dislike for our families, and I felt like we were frozen in time, and the cards were in John B’s hands now. 

We’re on a boat, no idea if we’re heading back to the outer banks, or if we were gonna wait it out now. And I knew in my heart; I wasn’t the kook princess anymore, I was a pogue, and this was me saying goodbye to that life.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I didn’t know where Pope was taking the boat now, but I had a feeling it was nowhere near Outer Banks. He wouldn’t return there because that would be the first place Ward came to look for Sarah. Nah, Pope was smart, so he’d pick someplace Ward would never think to look for us. I smiled when I saw Sarah pull out the bandana. It meant a lot to me that she kept it after all this time. “You still have it?” Even though I worded it in the form of a question, it was meant more to be a statement mixed with relief and surprise. “A pogue for life.” I repeated her words as I took the bandana from her grasp and wrapped it around her before tying off the end to keep it in place. “There you go, my little pogue.” I added with a slight grin.

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt guilty because it was her dad, her family that was now chasing the pogues off. We found the gold, it was ours but my family, they had greed, they wanted it for themselves, and I suddenly felt as if John B and the others were losing everything in account of me. And I hated it, I hated the pit in my stomach. For a second I glanced at the tides, the ocean as Pope and Jj were taking in the control, of steering the boat, Kiara was besides them probably wanting to give us a moment, space. Sarah felt like she was a pogue blood didn’t matter to her. 

She wanted this made family, she wanted John B, she loved him. He was everything to her. By now her smilt titled up to the male as she felt his fingers brush along the back of her neck, as he tied the bandana, around her neck, it’s rightful spot. Tilting her head back slightly to offer that loving smile of hers, her fingers brushing over the material of his bandana, she said it so clearly. “ Til death do us part.” A pogue, for life; stuck together, Shifting fully to face him. “ You know you’re kinda stuck  with me now..” All the tension that once rose, it was peace in knowing we had each other now.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

“No complaints from me.” I quietly aired out in response to Sarah’s declaration. Pogues were in it for life. Sure, I knew technically speaking, people would argue that Sarah was a kook not a pogue, but that’s not how I saw it. She was one of us. She had been for a long time now, and nobody was going to convince me otherwise. Thing is, her family is deranged, greedy, out for themselves, and they needed to be stopped, but Sarah was nothing like them. She was good, kind, caring, loyal, brave, and I knew she’d always have our backs. It was who she is. As far as I was concerned, it didn’t matter where her house was technically located in our town… She’s a pogue through and through. I thought to myself as I finished tying off the bandana then I tiled my head downward so I could press a tender kiss to her head. “For now, let us take care of getting out of here in one piece and to get us somewhere safe, while you rest and heal.” I couldn’t downplay Sarah’s injury. The blackmarket doctor may have gotten the bullet out, but I knew in my gut Sarah wasn’t out of the woods yet, so even though we were on the run now, I still wanted to make sure she rested and remained as still as possible in an effort to keep her from bleeding out or any other complications she could face in aftermath of her gunshot wound. 

[ofnotakook]

I can always trust in you

@apogueforlife 

I can always trust in you 

Trust; it had to be earned. Love; it had to be developed. For Sarah she always had her guard up. Each time she’d get close to letting someone in the other shoe would drop, she’d freeze up, and run in the other direction. With each boyfriend she ever had she had the urge to run. To distant herself when she felt like she was trapped. When she felt the pressure to feel more than what she did. Topper he liked the idea of her. He loved the idea of being with her; but he wasn’t in love with her. 

There’s only one boy Sarah loved; and that was John B. It happened unexpectedly. It happened on a day she never saw coming. That day stayed with her. The day we went to chapel hill; the day we had fun dressing each other up. The day we pretended to be our alter egos; Val and Vlad. It was nice to be herself. I didn’t feel the pressure to be perfect. I didn’t feel like my family was watching me, I was myself. I felt safe, I felt like John B saw me despite all the flaws I had. He loved me for me, and I loved him. It was a roller coaster of a relationship if you asked me. We had gone from barely knowing each other; to falling completely utterly in love. I gave up my kook card for him. I knew the obsluces we’d be facing now, the pogue’s vs the kook. But nothing made me question my loyalty to him. To the Pogues. It got messy with my dad; him being the reason Big John was gone. The reason why the gold was taken. The reason I was on the run with John B. The gold felt so close yet so far. We managed to clear John B’s name but that’s because Ward decided in his best interest to fake his own death and act like the hero. The guy that claimed to have been a killer in order to protect his own son. Rafe just the thought of being near him made me sick to my stomach. For a second I was upset, I felt like my whole body ached when I witnessed the boat blow up. When I witnessed my father shatter beyond the sea. And that’s when I saw the truth; what led to us being torn apart; what led to John B and I no longer being together. He had been happy to ward dead; and I couldn’t exactly find the words to blame him. He took everything from him. But at the end of the day; he was my dad. I was hurting and I remembered that look all too well; the look of proudnessI felt like I was seeing another person. I was grieving the dad I once looked up to, to the dad that I was once his princess. I needed John B to hold me, to make me feel like it was always going to be okay. But it suddenly felt like us it wasn’t meant to be.. 

Walking away for yourself; was all you could do. It was hard to be near him; to be pulled back into the adventure; to the cross. But for Pope I’d be there; awkwardness assured. Sarah didn’t know if she should make eye contact with him; or just stay silent. Silence seemed better; until that night; we had a plan to get the cross from Rafe; the big truck was parked outside my house. JJ and Pope were hidden behind the bushes. I was determined to walk inside; to get the key to unlock the truck; how we’d get the heavy cross out was a big ass story of it’s own. But I had made two steps to the gates, one glance backwards; I saw him John B was about to get up; and for a second I found myself hopeful; maybe this was the moment of the unknown. What comes next? Dark hues met for a second and I swore the air was taken out of my lungs; but he didn’t budge, didn’t move. Giving me the indication we had nothing left to say. That was the last memory I had of him; of us staring at each other. 

Head leaned against the gated up windows of my room at the barbados house, The house I was locked into. The boat felt like a nightmare; I was drugged by my own family. Rose had put a drug in my tea. Rafe and had helped her execute the plan; to force me here against my will. I remembered telling Ward when he claimed John B only cared about the treasure about the gold that I was just stuck in the cross hair that he was wrong. That John b would find him and come for him once I went missing. How wrong had I been? I wanted to blink back the tears that dared to fall. I was a pogue at heart; I chose it for John B because I loved him, despite our differences he’d always have a permanent place in my heart. It had been weeks since we left on the boat, I had tried to zone out the conversations of my parents; I had pretended to be sleeping at times, but here once I had been pulled into my room I never left. I guess Ward was afraid I’d run, or threaten to tell the cops his own daughter was kidnapped against her will. Give or take. Sarah swallowed the lump in her throat; it had gotten dark. She smelt the tray of food that her sister left her outside the door. Her bed was an inch away; The light pink covers still in place, it had been a day or two since we arrived, and I had slept in my bed because that meant i was okay, that meant that I was adjusting to being here; in this house. When all I wanted was to break free. At the window, on the seat where my back was pressed against the wall. Head tilted towards the window, I could see the water; any boats that passed by. I was alone; and all I could hope was that the Pogue’s were okay that perhaps my dad was right they managed to get the cross and that’s all that mattered for Pope. Eyes moved to the stars; for a moment it was nice to believe we were looking at the same stars; as if John B was on his way; assuming my dad was lying. For now all I could do was hold hope; I’d find a way out; it was a done deal. 

Tomorrow; I’d work out a plan. The Pogues would have me, if I found him. We’d always have each other. A wistful thought as a hint of a smile tainted onto my lips.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Love. Definitely not something I ever believe really existed. I always saw it more as, in life, people come and go. The ones who matter will stick with you, through thick and thin. For me, that was the Pogues: JJ, Kie, and Pope. I don’t remember a time in my life when those three weren’t part of it, and something tells me, I’ll never shake them either. Not that I’d want to, cause they’re everything to me. Then Sarah Cameron busted into my life unexpectedly… One of those surprising moments where I got myself in a sticky situation, and Sarah Cameron, of all people, was the one who bailed me out of it. Even more surprising though was how I felt when I was with her. It was the first time in my life when I found myself wanting to be with a girl exclusively. In time she even made me rethink my original theory about love. Then, well, I guess you could say life happened, and we broke up. Sure, I knew I played a part in our break up. When her father died, I should have been more supportive of the toll that loss would take on Sarah. Yeah, the guy was bad news… A lying crook, which Sarah obviously knew too, but he was still her father. Given the bad blood I had with Ward, and also the fact that he murdered my father, could you really blame me for being relieved that the guy was finally gone? Right or wrong, it’s how I felt. This leading to the end of Sarah’s and my relationship. Still, in my heart I knew this wasn’t the end for us. A love like ours always finds a way back to one another. Naïve or not, I refused to see it any other way…

Then weeks passed and I was starting to wonder if it really had been the end for us. Mind you, I still wasn’t giving up, but instead of dwelling on what may or may not happen between me and Sarah, instead the Pogues and I focused on getting the cross back for Pope. It actually became a, “Kill two birds with one stone” type of adventure for us though, since word got to me that Sarah had been abducted by her family. Them ultimately boarding a ship with Sarah and the cross, allegedly heading to Barbados; knowing that was exactly where we would be going to. This was it… This was our chance to, not only help Pope get the cross back, but also for me to rescue Sarah too…

Given that us Pogues had made some enemies, and also the fact that we didn’t have so much as a pot to piss in, much less money to travel to Barbados, it took some work, a lot of time, and even more creativity on our parts before we finally reached Barbados. Once we did, I knew we needed to devise a plan to get back both Sarah and the cross. Of course JJ, as usual, came up with one of the worst plans I had ever heard. This saying a lot considering JJ’s had some really shitty plans, over the years. This one pretty much topped the other bad plans he’s had though; prompting all of us to shoot down his plan and come up with another one. Knowing it was either come up with a better plan, or go with JJ’s plan which will likely either get us all killed, or at the very least, we’ll end up locked up in some jail cell. In time we did come up with a new plan. Not a great one, but definitely better than JJ’s plan, so it was something, at least. For our part we decided one step at a time…

We’d wait till night, rescue Sarah first, and then once we had her safely out of that house and away from her deranged family, we’d devise a plan to get the cross back. I mean, it’s not like we could just knock on the front door, and request either. Not without being shot, that is. We couldn’t even break in and steal the cross without getting caught, since it was so damn heavy, it was going to take a hell of a lot of brute strength to carry it, so we’d just deal with that plan later. For now, my focus was on Sarah. Sure, I knew there was a chance I’d be the last person she’d want to see tonight, but given me and the Pogue’s rescuing her, or her remaining a hostage with her own family, I figured I was the lesser of the evils, so to speak. I justified as Kie and Pope remained look outs from the ground; keeping hidden to the garden area where they tried to remain unseen, while JJ and I went to the roof. With JJ’s help, he hoisted me down onto the balcony I had scoped out and learned led to the bedroom they were keeping Sarah locked in. Once I approached the balcony window, I peaked inside discreetly; making sure her family was nowhere in sight before I gave a couple of light taps on the window. My way of alerting Sarah that I was here. Of course the window was pad-locked, which just pissed me off more. How could they do this to Sarah? The Cameron’s definition of family was nothing more than a load of bullshit, if you ask me, because this isn’t how you treat family. I thought in building anger as I used the pin I had with me to trigger the lock. Once I heard it click, my eyes shifted up toward JJ. The thumbs up he gave me in reply assuring me he had cut the security system like he confidently told me he could easily handle. This was JJ, so although I’d trust him with my life, and well, I had a few times, I still held my breath as I slowly and gingerly opened the window; expelling a quiet sigh of relief when an alarm didn’t sound as I opened the window] Val…? [I quietly whispered her code name into the dark bedroom. Hoping it would soften any resentment she might have in seeing me here now] Vlad and the crew are here to spring you from here… [I further whispered into the dark bedroom as I waited for her to come over to the window; knowing we didn’t have long before someone would alert the Cameron’s that the security system had been hacked into, so the sooner we got out of there, the better our chances of getting out of here alive]

[ofnotakook]

The pogue plans never went according to plan. Not that Sarah was going to complain now considering. She was able to escape the bars that locked her into her old bedroom. She was tired of starving herself out of spite. She was tired of laying awake at night in fear that she might be dragged out of bed. She was tired of being forced to live the perfect life. Forced to smile for her parents; the only one in her family she liked was her sister Wheezie, she’s who I wanted to protect. But she had young opinions, didn’t see what our family was capable of. And given how much risk John B went through to find me, I had to go with him. Not that I wanted to stay trapped or that I’d risk his life to save my sister. 

I felt torn with myself now. I escaped; I was on the roof; I had survived the lies, I had survived my own father aiming a gun at me; of course to his unknown knowledge Ward did exceed in his aiming and catching fire on one of us. I doubted his attention was to hurt me. Yet again it felt like a toss up considering, he did try to strangle me to death; and drugged me to get onto that stupid boat. But I knew him to know the problem wasn’t my stubbornness, it was John B and the pogues. He was threatened, and right now the Camerons wasn’t my family; it was the pogues. I had chose them a long time ago weather I wanted to admit it or not. 

Safe; is what I felt; despite the pain that was pooling on my side; the white sweater was making it difficult to hide. But I felt his kiss; the graze of his lips on my head, a tenderness of who we were. A love language for us. Seeing as JJ had followed my lead; and started down the ladder; I had stepped forward turning my back to where my hues fell on the male I loved with all my heart. Despite our differences that did come to light when I uttered the words maybe we weren’t meant to be, to work out. 

A soulfulness in my stare as I uttered my words. “ Promise you’ll come down.” I mouthed the words “ I can’t lose you.” As my palm wasn’t already filled with my own blood. Taking my hand from side, I placed them firmly on the handles of the ladder, with one step and than the next. I caught sight of the droplets of blood hitting the ladder as I climbed down, It wasn’t until I reached the bottom, I felt JJ; place his hand on my hip in order to help me off when he wore this stunned expression. “ Sarah.” He mouthed, I knew he felt it; the blood that now covered his hand; I shook my head. “ Don’t say a word.” I had strength I’d be okay until I couldn’t walk anymore; He was about to say something when I hit him in the chest. 

John B would be in earshot; I couldn’t tell him yet; once we were in the clear I’d tell him, but I didn’t want him to worry about me, not after all the risks he took to save me. Pushing myself to the side, I eyed the small area where our feet hit the grass; Kie and Pope had to make it to the gates; where it led to the waterfront it was our get away. Our only glimmer of hope.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I promise. I’ll be right behind you. [I assured Sarah as I watched JJ go down the ladder first, to ensure it was safe for Sarah to follow. Once JJ gave the “all clear” signal, I gave Sarah and nod to begin descending the ladder] You’ll be okay. JJ will meet you at the bottom, and I won’t be far behind. [I reminded her as she started to descend the ladder. I ducked down lower to the roof as I heard the sound of more gunshots looming in the air. Once Sarah was about halfway down the ladder, I started to position myself onto the ladder; getting a good grip on the sides before I slowly began descending the ladder too. It wasn’t long before I could faintly hear Sarah and JJ safely at the bottom on the ground below the ladder, and I was following them moments later. After I reached the bottom, I noticed the concerned look JJ was giving me, but assuming it had something to do with the fact that we were all still in danger on the Cameron’s grounds, I didn’t question JJ on his strange look. Instead, I snaked my arm gently and protectively around Sarah’s shoulder; gently tugging her closer to me before speaking up in a hushed volume] Okay, we made it this far, which is great, but we’re not out of danger yet. Let’s get to Pope and Kie, and then all of us get the hell out of here. [I suggested before nodding my head toward JJ; gesturing for him to lead the way. The sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better our chances would be of us surviving this]

[ofnotakook]

He’d be right behind me. It was a sense of comfort knowing I wasn’t alone.That I was nearly to safety but the question lingered of how long. Because I felt the bleeding on my hip, I felt the lost of blood that peeled from my skin. Not that Sarah was about to utter a word. If she did their plan of escaping would be jeopardized. And JJ and John B had risked it all for her. Kie and Pope were on the lower ground taking cover on her behalf. Sarah wasn’t selfish; she knew when to take one for the team. Her dad; his shots that were fired. It was venages for her; for the Pogues brainwashing her; but the truth was Sarah saw beneath the scars. She saw the truth. The perfect knit family wasn’t real. She had hoped her father would be okay; that he would let her go. Let the pogues go give John B what was rightfully his. 

But instead he saw me as property. I wasn’t a person to him. I was his daughter yes; but I also was my own mind and heard. All that to say I tried not to shake when I heard the gunshots in the distance. I had my hands holding onto the ladder as JJ slowly helped me down. Blood it was obvious at the edge of the ladder; I easily shook my head to JJ; indicating John B didn’t need to know. I was fine. I Swore I caught an edge of concern against his expression. Did JJ care? I asked myself as feet hit the pavement; the edge of the roof as we lowered ourselves down to the ground. His arm was comfort; he was there with me every step of the way. 

Reaching up with my cleared hand; I intertwined my palm with his own. Above my shoulder as I forced a smile. “ almost there.” I whispered as i felt the throbbing on my side; the dripping of redness down my leg; I just hoped it was dark enough to hide. Enough to give us a clear out before I had to say the words. I was shot; a haunting thought as I saw Kie and Pope in sight. 

“ Once we step down one last step, run to the gates, there’s a boat waiting okay. I’ll get the keys.” I told myself it was a solid plan; despite my obvious discomfort to myself. I leaned up to press a kiss to John B’s hand lips against his thumb before I gave the nod to Kie and Pope. 

It was time to run; it was our only chance; even if it meant the Pogues leaving without me; I could handle my injury and my dad; but John B needed an escape or his life was at risk; and right now I cared less about me and more about his safety. “ Run.” Whispered as hands released his own as my body heavily dropped to the ground. Shots being fired; I leaned down enough to swat; to hide under until the walkway cleared.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I gave a nod of relief to Sarah and JJ once our feet finally hit the pavement below. Sure, I knew we still had a challenge ahead of us, even more of one now that Ward knew I had taken Sarah, so I guarantee he wasn’t the only one firing a gun currently. Now we had him, and his whole damn security department firing at us, too. Regardless, we made it this far, which to some, seemed like an impossible feat in and of itself, but we’re still alive, so that’s something. I justified optimistically as Sarah told us the next part of the plan. Good thing we managed to get her out, because JJ nor I had come up with an escape plan. In normal pogue fashion, we planned to wing it once we reached the point… You know, assuming that we made it this far, I should say] Okay, babe. [I said as I heard her instruct us to “run,” and then she released my hand. Given how close I had already come to losing her, I wasn’t about to let her out of my sight; especially in a dangerous situation like this. With that protective thought in mind, I hadn’t run far before realizing she was no longer at my side, or even behind me] Sarah? Sarah, where are you? [I asked in a hushed volume as I started to back track to find her. It didn’t take me long before I nearly tripped over her as she laid down onto the ground] What are you doing? Are you okay? [Assuming maybe she tripped and hurt herself or something, which is why she didn’t get up and continue running with us. Either way, I waited for the latest bout of gun shots to fade out before I helped Sarah up from the ground. This time snaking my arm around her to keep her close as we prepared to catch up with the others] Can you walk? [Prepared to carry her on my back if she was hurt and couldn’t run. Whatever it took to get Sarah safely out of here, I was all for doing it. Sarah’s safety and freedom was my top priority right now]

[ofnotakook]

A getaway plan; honestly Sarah could easily say she had the grounds of the priority mapped out in her head. But the times she’s visited this house she could count on her hand. It was slim; but right now she had to save herself or she risked the chance of Ward getting his hooks not just in her; but it put the pogues in danger. The same people who risked their lives in order to save her. Sarah didn’t take it for granted; she knew she was a mess. She was someone who was torn between love and her family. But she was locked in her own room on more than one occasion. Her father proved he only cared about the gold. It stung; it made Sarah feel like shit; like she wasn’t enough for her own father. 

But now wasn’t the time; the end was near. She felt her knees wobbly, she felt the lost of blood elevate against her frame. Feet planted against the pavement; her eyes scanned the grounds until they reached Kie and Poper who had keys in their hands; they found the keys to the boat under one of my rocks. It was kinda my getaway car back in the day when I wanted to be reckless; I wanted an escape; apparently it was my younger self telling me to be prepared. Because right now our best bet was to run. Run through the pavements; the mountains of trees to get to the edge. I whispered the words. JJ didn’t need any admission; he ran like hell while guns were being fired. Fired at us; which is why I ducked. Not voluntarily; I had fallen to my knees. I had fell right to the ground. I felt my lungs closing off; I felt the air in my body slowly leaving, as I felt my frame hit the ground in a huff. 

I knew John B; he’d never leave without me. I was kinda surprised he hadn’t picked up on the trail of blood I left on the roof; the ladder in my wake. But to my surprise my secret was that a secret. Eyes closed growing heavy that was until I felt his hands roll onto my own palms. Fingers curled around his hands as I slowly pushed myself back onto my feet. “ I’m okay.” A fat lie I screamed at myself. The dirty blonde moved in the threes; in the brushes; her sneakers ran across the lawn until she heard her feet against the pavement. “ John B.. If I fall behind I need you to run like hell okay.” A demand not an ask. The female whispered in a low tone as fingers tighten around his palm. “ I was shot..’ The words stuck on her tongue as she paused; glancing down to her hip; her hip where there was a big ass stain of redness under her sweater; the white sweater now red; she bit down on her lip in fear; and now she’d be the reason they got caught; from running for their lives. 

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what, I would never leave Sarah behind. She was everything to me. Including my favorite pain in the ass that I argued with like we were already a married couple. Point is, I loved Sarah more than life itself, and even though things were a bit up in the open currently between us, that didn’t matter, because I would always come for her. Case and point when I saw her drop down and without a second thought or hesitation, I went back for her and then waited until she was ready to move before we continued our escape. My face turned pale though as I could feel the blood leaving my cheeks when I heard her confession about being shot] What? You were shot? [Quietly repeating the words back to myself, as if trying to process it, but also hoping that I had heard her wrong and she’d correct me now. Judging by the blood I saw that had stained her shirt, I knew I hadn’t imagined it. My worst nightmare was happening now in the fact that Sarah was hurt] It’s going to be okay. I’ll get you out of here and then we’ll get you help. [I assured her. No way in hell of knowing if she was going to be okay or not. I mean, she was shot. With a bullet. She was bleeding, and I had no way of knowing how much blood she’s lost already, because I was just now hearing she was hurt] Let’s get you on my back, and I’ll carry you out of here. [My way of letting her know that, no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her behind, so this way, if we get caught, we’re going to do so together. I silently justified as I squatted down as low as I could, so Sarah didn’t have to strain too much to shift onto my back]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s family was the why the Pogue’s were in this mess. The why we were fighting for our life’s. Namely the finger needed to be pointed towards my father. The man who wanted to be a proud family man, adoring father was willing to aim guns at his own daughter. He chose a hell of a long time ago. I wasn’t the kook anymore; I was a pogue; the family I decided I wanted. My pure love and adoration for John B. He was my everything. The boy I wanted to bicker with day and night. The boy I wanted to run on adventures with. He understood me, I never felt alone with him; I never felt like I had to pretend. I always felt trapped, the need to run from how I felt those strong feelings until I met him. Until we kissed; and fell insanely in love. 

And this island; the gold being unreachable now; was on me. I was the one who believed in my dad; kept opening my mouth and claiming he loves me, he’d never hurt me. I was the fool a disgrace not only had my brother tried to kill me drown me, my own dad wanted me dead. I had nothing but John B and the pogue’s. They were all I needed. 

Each leg of movement was starting to cause a strain on my body. I had no issues running; it was the open wound on my abdomen that was preventing me from moving fast enough. Knees weak, I could barely keep up. I heard the others in a distant reach the boat; the boat that was gassed up; the keys I knew where they were hidden the backup keys I mean. I remembered going out on this boat as a child; for our family trips on the ocean. What an embarrassing moment now considering. Leaning over my frame; eyes staring at the grass that touched my ankles. Head moving to stare between my legs in order to catch my panting breaths. I felt weak, I said the words. And I swore I heard John B stop; he paused in disbelief but the writing was pooling down my legs; the droplets of blood obvious. Tilting my head up I bit down on my lower lip to hold in the whine the pain of my wound. “ John B..” Name lingered on my tongue as tried to find the how I’d get this boy to leave without me. Instead he decided to bend down to the ground. I hesitated, I didn’t want to hold him back. “ I..” I started but I also know this boy; he’d risk it all for me. It didn’t make sense for both of us to risk being caught here, but with last minute thinking I pulled myself onto his back. Arms wrapped loosely around his neck. Legs wrapping around his waist, once I was safely on his back I rested my head on his shoulder. “ You can move now..” I echoed in a nearly teasing retort. Keep it light; until we escaped. 

A death trap of my own making.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what happened, I would never leave Sarah behind. I wasn’t stupid. I knew us breaking into her family’s compound tonight to break her out was a death trap. It was a fool’s errand, but I didn’t care. Sarah was in danger. She might not see how deranged her father and brother are, but I knew. I saw first-hand what her psychotic father was capable of, so I wouldn’t put anything past him now. Including him hurting his own daughter just to ensure he kept her far away from me. The man was a damn lunatic and the sooner I got Sarah away from him, the better off she’d be. The driving reason I broke into her room tonight. Well, “prison” was probably a more fitting word given the bars her father had put on her windows, so she could be kept there as his prisoner. Asshole. I thought in disdain as we ran toward some semblance of safety. I stopped though when I realized Sarah was no longer behind me. Panic setting in since it was dark, which made it difficult to see. Following the sounds of her breaths and rustling through the grass as I back-tracked back toward her. Shock and fear washing over me in hearing she had been shot. A part of me wondering if taking her back to her father was the best course of action, since his ties and pull could have a doctor here in moments. Still, something told me she wouldn’t want to go back there. She’d choose to take the risk to keep moving] I’ve got you. Don’t worry. I’d never leave without you, Sarah. [I assuredly whispered out as I helped her get situated safely on my back; ensuring her arms were wrapped tightly around my neck and her legs secured around my waist before I started through the trees and such in search of JJ and the others] “John B? Where the hell are you?” [I heard the familiar sound of JJ’s voice airing out nearby in a hushed tone. Moving in the direction of his voice, I eventually caught up with them. Keeping Sarah securely on my back as we reached them] “Ready for the next part of the plan? The diversion?” [JJ asked with pride in his voice, which prompted a skeptical look from me. All of us knowing JJ wasn’t the best at plans, but I did feel better when Pope and Kie chimed in to share that they had actually helped with this part of the plan] If it gets us out of here, then hell yeah, do it! [I muttered out as I watched JJ throw a lit flare in the direction of the wooded area we had all just escaped from, before throwing two others in separate directions of the same wooded area. Listening and watching as I saw a small explosion go off, followed by another, and then countless more. Pope and Kie explaining they rigged those while they were waiting for us to break Sarah out. Chuckling in pride and feeling a momentary sense of victory as I realized we temporarily stopped Ward’s guards from catching up; prompting us to continue running the remaining way off of the compounds and then into the city. Now it was just a matter of finding a place to hide out and to get Sarah medical attention] Sarah was shot, so we need to get her to a doctor before we do anything else. [I explained to the others; watching the wheels practically turning in their head on how to work this one out without all of us ending up getting caught]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s greatest fear was her friends, was the boy she loved getting hurt on her behalf. She always believed in the good in her father; that he had made mistakes. But when it came to their family he always held their best interest at heart. But all the evidence was staked against him. He faked his own death; he was okay with putting his arms around my neck. He was okay with shooting a bullet not knowing where it land. And Sarah was caught in that crossfire. She was scared that her now slow pace would hurt the pogues in the end. Her new Family. And she knew better than to fight with John B, than to plead with him to keep going without her. He’d never leave her behind. He was noble, he was the man that loved her more than his own life. 

And she’d risk it all for him too. He was the light in her new darkness. Sarah tried to hide it; the trail of blood she now kept behind her. She held the wound to her hip as tightly as she could; until she fell. She fell forward breathing heavily feeling the impact of loss blood. She was trying to move forward in the deep grass; but her feet stopped. She had hoped the male had moved far enough forward to forget; about her. But his voice was like a compass calling her home. And she had to smile to herself as she pulled herself onto his back. Bitting down on her lip knowing she was in pain; that pain in her side, the pool of blood that was now hitting his shirt. Head slowly came to rest on his shoulder; weakness inside of her. “ I know..” She whispered in a weakened tone. She held on for dear life; she had her arms wrapped around his neck, and her legs slid around his waist; a sense of safety; as we neared the spot where the others were. 

The night was dark; no one noticed her pale face; the weaken state she was in. Another phase to the plan? Her eyes trailed over to the smirks of her friends; the explosions that they had in fact thrown in the direction of each guard growing on their tails. A small smirk tugged at her lips. Severs Ward right, to come for family; and you get burned. The others glanced at her; as the elephant in the room was exposed. She was shot; weak; blood pooling out of her as she spoke. “ I’m fine.” She said as she rested her head back down on his shoulder. She vaguely heard JJ make a plan. “ We run into town. There’s abandoned buildings, maybe we find a doctor office on our way.” It wasn’t settle or optimistic in any form; but maybe if we found supplies; I could stitch up my own wound. I had no desire to see a doctor again; nor could we trust any person wouldn’t go running to Ward. So I had barely said a word; leaving the decision up to John B; he was the fighter; the leader in this mess. I’d trust him; I’d follow him anywhere.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I nodded in response to JJ’s suggestion. No offense to my best friend, or anything, but when he came up with plans, they usually crashed and burned. Then again, his idea to break Sarah out wasn’t his worst plan. Mind you, she did get shot as a result of the escape, but I don’t know if I can necessarily blame JJ’s plan for that, or just pin the blame on Ward for being a deranged and psychotic piece of shit] I think heading toward the town is a good idea, but Sarah definitely needs a doctor. Kai, you still have the fake IDs we had made up for all of us, right? [Kai nodded in response while flashing me a confused look] Okay, so if we go to a doctor’s office or hospital, we can use the fake IDs, so Sarah’s identity doesn’t get back to her father. Either way, we need to get the bullet out of Sarah, and get her stitched up. That’s our first priority once we get off of this property. [I explained. Knowing Sarah was getting weaker from the blood loss, so the sooner we got her gunshot wound tended to, the more at ease I would feel that she’s going to be okay. Honestly, at this point in time, my only concern was Sarah. I kept that thought to myself though, because I knew if I startled to unravel with worry, everyone else would begin unraveling too. Bottom line, we weren’t going to make it out of this situation alive if we didn’t remain level headed and make the right decisions]

[ofnotakook]

Right decisions; was it ever in our nature? To be smart, to not lead on impulse? In the short time Sarah spend with John B and the pogues, she’s learned JJ and John B tended to make decisions on a whim. They tended to come up with a plan and without thinking ran with it. Granted it Sarah owed her life to the poges, she owed the idea that she was released from the bars of her own bedroom due to them. And she appreciated the fact given the limbo state the male and myself were tethered into that they risked it all for me. The wrath from my dad; the Camerons’s who I was learning spelled terrible news. Sarah always believed in her dad; the type of man he was. He was kind, he cared about his family wanted to provide for us. But the money the power it gave a person it tended to steamroll you into a horrible person. Sarah couldn’t believe her eyes; the lengths her dad was willing to go, harming his own daughter, embedding Rafe despite his own crimes. She felt disgusted with her own family. The blonde knew where she belonged; where her heart was. Holding onto dear life to the man she currently had her arms wrapped around. 

The blonde let nimble fingers graze over the thin layer of his shirt; the weak grip she held. Her wound was obvious, the blood pooling down her leg. Ward got her damn good. And Sarah hated her fate was on the edge of a line. Doctors wasn’t an option, she knew this island. She knew Ward was probably on a warpath now for blood. Pogues won by letting my escape happen, and now he’d be paying off any source he could, to get his hands on me. 

The female listened despite her own body was fading, head rested upon his head; the comfort of his scent, she was always safe with him. Eyes blinked open and closed, and she slowly let her weaken vision take in the pogue’s who glanced in every direction Smoke of the explosion was all in the air, intoxicating. “ Go South, we get on the boat, and port half way down the island, there’s a hidden office, our best bets is escaping this house.” A thought for food; a hidden doctors office; one that may get me home sailing. 

Without the risk of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised that, in spite of her condition, Sarah was the one to air out the best and most sensible plan. Giving a nod in response as I looked toward JJ and the others] You heard her. Head south. [I said in agreement as I continued carrying Sarah on my back as we all made route south toward the docks. Knowing our risk was still higher than not of getting caught, but she was right… If we had a chance of getting out of here and to freedom, this was the one with the best odds. More than anything though, I just wanted to get her somewhere safe, so she could get some medical attention. I could hear by how weak her voice was that she was losing a lot of blood. The longer this continues, the worse her chances of survival were. Once we reached the docks, we ducked into the shadows until reaching the boat. I made sure to get Sarah on safely, and then I laid her down across one of the seats to rest, while I helped JJ and Pope to untie the ropes; all the while Kai started up the boat. Knowing we’d all need to work together, and to do so quickly, or else we weren’t getting out of here alive] Okay, Kai, we’re clear. Get us the hell out of here. [I called out to her as me and the other guys pushed the boat away from the dock to give it an oomph and then once the boat was cleared from the sides, I returned to Sarah] How bad is it? [I asked as I grabbed the first aid kit stowed under the one seat. Not that I could do much with my incredibly limited experience and knowledge, but I felt helpless by not doing what I could for her now. Besides, if I could at least slow the bleeding, that would give her the best fighting chance to stay alive until we were able to get her medical attention]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt like she had lost everything. She used to be the girl who would always go to the beck and call of her dad; he used to be the incredible man she grew up with. He used to be the man who read bedtime stories to her. He used to give her a glass of milk each time. She had so many fond memories of him. But now; it felt like those memories were tainted. Sarah had always believed in him, she fought the urges to go against him. Seeing his boat explode it destroyed her; she broke up with John B the man she loved for him, because he was glad the man who took his father away got justice. Was dead. And suddenly it felt like our love wasn’t meant to be. 

And now Sarah was bleeding out because of the man who was supposed to protect her. He shot fire at her; at her friends not caring of the consequences. That was the sadness of the reality. That I was alone. I couldn’t turn to my sister, I couldn’t protect. I had to put myself first, and that was the pogues my made family. We lift each other up, we go to bat for each other. And I knew the high stakes. I knew what my father was capable of. I had to wonder how I had any ounce of love for him after what he’s done. Lying to protect Rafe, letting my brother get away with attempting to drown me, he let me get drugged. He’d rather put harm to me than take accountability. And I had to swallow that truth. With a heavy head I felt like my vision was becoming blur as I spurred the last task at hand. Hands loosen on the grip against John B’s shirt, as my eyes drifted shut. How long had we walked? Before I heard the rustling of feet hitting the docks. And I felt my body being dropped gently into the boat, back pressed against a hard backing on the edge. Slowly eyes lifted seeing blurs. 

Figures moving left and right; the “ Ropes done.” I heard from JJ as both boys plopped themselves down on the boat. Pope was at the wheel with Kie, I heard the soft whispers of nothingness. And I heard his voice, the one that always dragged me home. And I wanted to be honest, as my hand slowly nimbly moved against the dam fabric of my sweater as I lifted it up. And I saw it the blood, it was dark, and it explained why I felt faint. Turning my eyes to the man I loved; John B was preparing to bandage up the wound for a short time. “ It doesn’t look pretty, I’ll have a nasty scar if anything.” I aired out attempting to lighten the mood as I felt the boat move as if it was full of lighten. 

This remembered me of when I saved his ass, when we first started out; on our little adventure. A shy grin turned against my lips as I spoke. “ Last time one of us had to bandage the other up, I was sneaking you into the house, I saved your ass, are we finally repaying the favor?” I asked with a sense of teasing in my voice. Definitely not the time, but I needed a laugh a small brief moment for just us.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Although I knew now wasn’t the time for jokes and quips, I still appreciated the fact that Sarah was trying to keep the mood light between us. Maybe if the circumstances had been reversed, I would have been all for cracking jokes… Hell, I would more than likely be cracking them too. Given that Sarah had been shot and was rapidly losing blood though, I definitely wasn’t in a fun and games kind of mindset. For her sake though, I did flash her a grin as I leaned down to press a tender kiss to her forehead] Well, I figured I owed you so it was high time I stepped up and returned the favor. Maybe next time you want me to save you though, let’s go with something that involves less blood shed and need for panic… Deal? [Giving it my best effort to joke in return. In the meantime I grabbed the first aid kit. My hand shaking slightly as I quickly fished around for some bandaging and things I thought I could use to stop the bleeding] Either way, I’m putting you in charge of keeping an eye on me to make sure I’m doing this right. I mean, doctor stuff is new territory for me so I’ll need the supervision. All that to say, eyes open at all times, okay? [My casual way of requesting to Sarah that I wanted her to keep her eyes open. Afraid that if she closed them and fell asleep, I might lose her. A thought that I couldn’t bear to consider as I started to do what I could to apply pressure to her wound and then applied some gauze and then bandaging too, all in an effort to stop the significant bleeding she was currently experiencing]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was well aware of the bleeding that now wasn’t the time for her humor, for her need to crack a joke open. But Sarah could see how scared he was; it was in his eyes. She was scared herself that she was about to take her last breath, by the hands of her own father. Ward had no idea she was assuming that he had aimed for her; she had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. Her own father pulled the trigger; he was aiming a weapon at her friends, at the man she loved. And now she was facing deaths door; she remembered the last time. 

John B was the one aching in pain as she ran her fingers with a cold rag over his blooded wound; which is why the dirty blonde showed amusement. Or she was going nuts with the lack of blood in her system. Eyes had slowed movement as he spoke; and she knew this was his way of saying “ Stop Sarah.” As if she planned on taking a bullet tonight. But her smile soften knowing feeling the panic under his tone, and her slimmed hand; her hand reached to touch his arm as a soothing of reassurance that she was okay. “ I promise next time, I’ll tell my dad not to shoot.” She echoed with that sarcastic retort of hers. But Sarah was done with the jokes. Not that she had the energy. She felt like her body was giving out; she felt the color had now drained from her face in the dark. She barely felt the boat moving against the water; the ocean seas; the seas that used to bring soothing. That used to make her feel safe; and now she was trembling, she felt his hand on her wound; and she had glanced down the blood was soaking her skin, right through his hand. “ Use the guse to wipe around the wound, and then bandage it gently at least until we arrive.” To a doctor; assuming we had the money to get me treated; or this was the end. Her eyes landed back on his features, and she uttered an “ I love you.” As if it was the last words she’d say. 

Eyes kept fluttering open and shut in a daze, despite the promise to stay with him, to guide him through the process; she hardly felt her hand move down to her side; as if her limbs were jelly now. If only this boat would move any faster..

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I appreciated Sarah’s attempt to crack jokes now. That was kinda our thing, you could say, but at the moment, I felt far from laughing. I was worried and growing even more so with every passing second. Sarah was shot. She was bleeding out currently, and I had no way of knowing if we’d get her medical attention in time to save her] Speed up the boat! Let’s go! [I yelled out to Pope and Kie as I saw Sarah’s eyes close. Judging by the worried look on JJ’s face, I knew he was thinking the same thing I was] Hurry the hell up, JJ, and help me pack her wound. Quick, get those gauze pads from the bag! [My voice shaking in building worry as JJ did as I ordered; grabbing me what I needed as I tossed the now soiled and blood soaked gauze pads to the side as I took the clean ones from JJ’s grasp. My hand shaking as I pressed it against Sarah’s gunshot wound. After what felt like a damn eternity, the boat pulled to a stop. I didn’t exactly know where we were at the moment, but at this point Pope and Kie were tying off the boat to the pier, so it wouldn’t go anywhere, and then they rushed toward us] “Come on. I got word that there’s a surgeon in town who handles cases like this for the right price.” [Pope explained which prompted my brows to furrow in confusion] “Get Sarah, let’s go.” [Kie instructed, which prompted me to tape off the currently gauzed padding I had in place, then JJ helped me to lift Sarah carefully out of the boat and onto the pier. Once JJ and I were on the pier, I cradled Sarah securely in my arms] “Here, take this bag. It should be enough to get her treated. Pope and I will stay with the boat.” [Kie said as JJ grabbed the bag and the address of the warehouse doctor, and then we rushed through the dark night air toward the provided address. A less than ideal situation from all angles given Sarah’s condition and the fact that we were in an unfamiliar place looking for the location of a doctor that we knew nothing about. Talk about a wild card move, at its best] Stay with me, Sarah. We’re going to get you help. Keep fighting. [I called out to her as JJ barked out instructions and I merely kept up with his pace as I carried Sarah in my arms toward our destination]

[ofnotakook]

A scar that might kill me. 

It was a thought for Sarah; she felt like she’d been through the ringer. Her own family was willing to sacrifice her for their own benefits. Sarah once thought the world of her father; of the family. But now she knew the truth they only craved the wealth they’d stomp on anyone who dared to stand in their way. Sarah’s own brother tried to drown her, and now her father was the one who pulled the trigger. Obviously he was aiming for John B, but Sarah knew she’d always end up in the cross fire. 

Not that she cared, she’d rather die than live without him. The words she said that night; on the smaller boat, as John B fought for his life, to escape the death sentence. And I meant it; I loved John B and yeah we fought; we ended up screaming at each other. But i’d do anything to be with him, and now as I was fighting for my own life; I only hoped the pogues survived. Sarah was falling unconscious, she had felt her body shutting off. The last words she spoke were of love, an undenying world of love for him. But she felt the blood lost. She felt her wounds becoming fetel. And she heard the urgent, the eagerness in her man’s voice as she felt the vague packing of her wound. How long had it been? 

She had no idea, because she felt darkness overcome her. She felt like she was falling into limo. She barely felt John B and JJ as they wrapped her sim arms around their shoulders and held her up. Enough to look like Sarah was walking, but she was dragged towards the clinic, and she barely heard the exchange when the surgeon called the three up. And with each step, she felt a slight ache in her body. An ache she wanted to subside. But Sarach knew she had to fight; to live, to open her eyes again. She felt her frame fall to a bedding; as her head hung down as the surgeon whispered. “ It’ll be okay, fight.” And She fel the breathing tube come to her nose, she felt the bleeding that was exposed. The doctor mumbled a few words to her friends. “ Do you have the money? She may not live.” He uttered and I felt my body weak. My own shadow breathing as my eyes slowly woke, for a second to see the unfamiliar surroundings, the walls brown. The tubes connected to me, I was scared. But I couldn’t move before my eyes went shut all over again. 

The doctor took the money and he soon took a tool; to save me, if it did any good, because right now I felt like I was on the brink of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

“Yeah, man. Here.” [JJ aired out in response to the shifty doctor’s request for money, before handing him a bag with money in it. My eyes shifted into a roll watching the doctor count it. So much for a moral code to save a life. Apparently all this asshole cared about what money] Just save her. Please. [I aired out pleadingly as I held Sarah’s hand with my one hand; all the while gently stroking back the hair from her face with my free hand. After a moment or so the doctor seemed satisfied with the amount of money JJ gave him inside that bag, and then he began. Watching as he first put Sarah under with what I assumed to be some kind of anesthesia before he grabbed a questionable looking scalpel so he could begin making the first cut. I knew in my gut that trusting this doctor might be the worst idea we’ve ever had, but at the same point, our hands were tied. It was either this option or we’d lose Sarah. Sure, his “she may not live” statement didn’t leave me with much confidence in his skills, but I had to believe in Sarah now. Sarah was strong. She was brave. If anyone could fight this, it was her] Come on, baby. Fight this. Don’t you dare leave me. Fight, baby. Fight. [I gently pleaded in her ear before pressing a tender kiss to her forehead] “Keep watch.” [I heard the doctor instruct of JJ before giving me a knowing sort of look and then a nod] “Here we go.” [The doctor said in less than a confident tone as he made the first cut; taking the scalpel across Sarah’s skin in order to remove the bullet from her body. It was excruciating to watch, but I promised myself that no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her side] “Grab those gauze pads and some gloves. Pour some of that vial with sanitizing solution directly over the incision spot and then place the gauze pads firmly across the area to slow her bleeding. We don’t want her losing more blood than she already has.” [The doctor instructed; forcing me to release Sarah’s hand, so I could assist in the surgery. After what felt like an eternity, he finished; managing to remove the bullet and then to seemingly successfully repair damage to her wounded organ internally. Once he finished, he stitched her up then covered the wound with a significant amount of gauze pads and medical tape] “It’s a wait and see, at this point, so let’s hope she’s a fighter.” [The doctor said while washing his hands in the sink in the corner of the room] She is. [I flatly said in response before removing my gloves and washing my own hands once the doctor had finished. After ensuring my hands were clean, I returned to the table where Sarah rested and I took her hand in my own] You’re a fighter, Sarah. The strongest person I know, so fight this. I’m not going anywhere. [I had no way of knowing if she could hear me, but I didn’t care. On the off chance that she could, I was going to remind her of her strength and ability to fight this now]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt the screams into darkness. She felt like she was on a cloud in limo. She had no control of her body; she felt like she was paralyzed. She didn’t have the power to move, she barely felt her body being held up. She didn’t want to die, she didn’t want to be traped in her own bedroom. She never asked her own father to shoot bullets at her and her friends. Sarah suddenly felt like her once simply life was a cycle of nightmares. Death on our door steps, the rush of running; being on the med. Sarah knew her getting shot was her fault. If she had just listened to John B weeks ago; that Ward didn’t have my best interest at heart. 

If I had stayed with Pogues instead of trusting my now psychic family. One trying to kill me left and right. Sarah had learned her lesson, the only people she could count on was herself, the pogues, even her sister she just hoped her sister was okay. She knew she was stipid to be thinking about anyone but herself now. But she held sympathy for others. The aching in her body was enough to force her to scream in pain if she wasn’t knocked out. She vaguely heard the way her body gently was placed down on a mental table.  I vaguely felt John B his breath in my ear as he tried to reassure me I was okay, I was a fighter. I was in my own little bubble. The darkness in my lids, the way my body was lifeless, especially as the doctor did insert his tool into my body, if I was awake I’d be screaming. I barely felt it; probably from the anesthesia. I couldn’t move, I had no idea how long I was out. I could vaguely hear the voices as the doctor echoed out it would be touch and go. Would I be surviving? Was I still bleeding out? Sarah felt the stirs in her mind as she laid still. Baby, fight.. Words echoed in my ears. 

John B, he needed me, he needed me to be strong, to fight through the blood lost. I couldn’t let him down. I was groggy when I suddenly felt the strength to open my eyes. The small light above me it flashed my eyes forcing me to squit, and I felt John B’s head on my stomach, not on the wounded skin, but right under. I was aching as I let out a soft wine. My hand pale as I lowered my hand onto his dirty brown locks, fingers slowly combed through his hair. “ John B.” I echoed in a whisper; I couldn’t speak and I noticed JJ was sitting in the chair, eyes closed, even JJ stayed. A made family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Hours passed by and there was no change. Sarah was so still and I had no way of knowing if she’d ever wake up. The doctor didn’t sound hopeful. Made a snide remark about her chances of pulled through as he greedily took our money and then ran like hell like some kind of coward. Clearly it was all about money for him. As more time passed, I found my head resting against Sarah’s side. Near her incision but not close enough to cause any further damage. I just wanted and needed to be close to her now. JJ wasn’t far away. He took a look out to make sure Ward nor any of his men were nearby before he’d return to the private room here and take a seat in the chair adjacent from where Sarah and I rested now. I didn’t know how much more time had passed… Felt like an eternity even though I knew it was probably just a few more hours, but eventually I heard the faint sound of her voice, as well as felt her fingers rustle gingerly through my hair. At that my head immediately shot up and I looked at her. Relief flooding my face and expression currently] You’re awake! Thank God! [I uttered out in evident relief as I pressed a gentle kiss to the back of her hand] How are you feeling? The black market doctor left a few things for pain if you need it. [The guy wasn’t exactly reliable but he did seem to save Sarah’s life, so at the moment, I was thinking a bit more favorably of him. Maybe he wasn’t a total money-hungry quack after all. Jury was still out on that one though] Do you want some water? [I asked as I had already picked up a fresh bottle of water; prepared to give her some if she was thirsty]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt weak, she ha no idea as to how long she’d been laying her. The memory of her father; of how easily he had aimed a gun at her, at her friends because of what? Jealousy? Because he wanted to hold this wild control over her? Sarah had once desired to please her family. She had once idolize her father the memory of us at the docks when I was only a little girl it clouded who I knew he was. 

But a few hours before he was so willing to throw me under the bus. He was so willing to let me bleed out on our yard. Because of his hate for the Pogues. I was hurt, I was feeling betrayed but at the same time, relieved as I felt my body come to life. I felt my eyes lift open as I adjusted to the dim light. I saw JJ in the corner as my eyes peeled over to John B who had his head rested against my palm. And I knew I was lucky, he was here. He loved me, and I had to let my fingers run soothingly through his dirty blonde locks. A small smile peeled at my lips. And I knew I couldn’t move. I felt numb to my core as my body was now healing from the blood lost, Sarah wasn’t going to jump up, the fear of Ward on our tail was aching against my own skin. The blonde had peered up at him; the man she loved so much. 

“ I’m okay.” As okay as I was going to be. The wound had been deep, the stitched up wound was felt as my eyes slowly moved to the man I loved. My hand moved to reach for John B. And I felt a sigh of relief escape my own lips. And I felt my gaze linger on him. “ I’m sorry, I’m sorry my dad is a crazy,” My words could never compare to the pain my family has caused him, the pogues and I wanted to do my part to mend those fences. “ Yes.” I echoed to the option of water my throat felt dry but I wasn’t going to jump forward, I slowly lifted my head up to get to a sitting position. My free hand had moved to my side, knowing the pain; the wound my own family caused.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I felt mounds of relief when I heard Sarah’s voice. She was alive. She was awake, and she was speaking. Lifting her hand to my lips as I pressed a couple of kisses to the back of her hand, then gently lowered her hand back down onto the metal table she was lying on] Hey, don’t apologize. It’s not your fault. All that matters is keeping you safe and away from your deranged family. [No matter what, I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t let Ward harm Sarah again. I thought to myself as I brought a fresh bottle of water to Sarah’s lips, so she could drink as much as she wanted and needed. I knew she needed time to rest and heal, but the sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better I could guarantee her safety from her family. One could hope, at least. I mean the way Ward operated, and the fact that he knew people all over the world, I wasn’t sure exactly how far remote we would need to go, and for how long either for that matter, in order to keep Sarah safe, but no matter what, I’d do what it takes. I came close to losing Sarah this time… Too close for comfort, so I wasn’t willing to take any chances with her safety again. At least not until Ward was no longer a threat to her] Once you’re well enough, we’re going to get you out of here. Pope and Kie are keeping an eye on the boat, and when you’re strong enough, we’re all getting on that boat, and getting as far away as possible. We figure with some distance and preferably some place off the grid, eventually your father will stop looking for you. [Maybe wishful thinking since Ward wasn’t one who took well to losing, but one could hope he’d eventually give up and accept that Sarah was gone]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah kept asking herself the obvious how she’d been blind. How she was capable of still holding a torch of love for her family. With all the crimes all the ways her own brother tried to murder her; sending drug mules her way, being the one that nearly drowned her to death. And now her own father; was so mad at the Pogues so terrified of losing his daughter to the pogues; not wanting to lose the fight that he aimed and shot me. The blood that once covered her fingertips, the blood the redness that ran over her sweater, it was an image Sarah couldn’t erase.  

Her friends, her boyfriend? Cut into the crossfires because of her fucked up  family. And even now as she opened her eyes; said a few words, she felt the aching on her wound, damn that stitch is gonna hurt like hell. But it was comforting to feel his touch, to witness his lips touching her knuckles once again. John B, he was her anchor that kept her whole. A soften expression; a smile curled at the corners of her lips as she saviored his touch; his lips against her skin. “  They drugged me, they forced me here. I feel trapped like no one is safe in that house, but my sister..”  A fear for the little Cameron it rocked me whole now, as I felt the lump forming in my throat. Wheezie she was innocent had no idea who’s roof she was living under. Like myself; I’d been blinded from the truth. But now my father was deranged; he passed off onto Rafe; and Rose was clueless as ever a pond in the game; until she crossed Ward. 

A slight cough was heard; as the blonde felt the wetness hit her tongue, one sip of water turned into half the bottle until she released the top from her lips and she slowly sat herself up, her palms hitting the metal of the table to hold herself up. Nuts insane considering her own wounds she wore. But her eyes ran along John B’s features with ease. “ You know he won’t let that happen. He blames you the pogues for his princess no longer being in his care. I’m a game for him to win..” A sad truth, an ached formed in her chest now.  “ I wouldn’t blame you if you allowed the pogues to leave me here for  dust to get away. I don’t want to bring you down, or put you and pogues in danger..” Not again the words hid  at the tips of her tongue. 

Danger; our names, but Ward he’d kill to end the war..I was terrified the lengths he’d go no matter how safe I felt with John B; he’d get hurt because of me. A pill I needed to swallow now.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, that would never happen. [I flatly replied with a matter of fact sort of shrug. Sure, I knew if this was just about Sarah, maybe JJ and the others would have high-tailed it out of here. Not necessarily Pope since he had a heart to do the right thing, but Kie was what you could say, hot and cold toward Sarah, so it wouldn’t take much for her to bail on Sarah. And well, JJ hated Kooks in general, so he had no loyalties to Sarah either. Thing was though, they all knew I’d literally die to protect Sarah, and the Pogues would always put their lives on the line to protect each other. All that to say, as long as I was staying put at Sarah’s side, the Pogues wouldn’t be going anywhere either because they’d always have my back, just like I’d always have theirs too. We fought fiercely for each other] Even if the others decided to high-tail it out of here, I’d never leave your side. Unless you tell me to go, I’m not going anywhere… [I started to say before an amused smirk followed] And even then, I can’t promise I’d actually leave. You know I’m stubborn when people try to tell me what to do. [I teased even though that was the truth] Either way, once you’re well enough, we’re all getting the hell out of here, and getting to safety together. Until then, just rest and heal. [I said as I gave her hand another gentle squeeze. My way of reassuring her that we were all in this together; no matter what the outcome]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah knew her choices  as of late not only disappointed herself but those around her. Sarah never wanted the wealth, she never wanted to be accepted as the princess Kook. That title had been given to her. People made assumptions about her; her personality; how she followed the kook business, and yes once upon a time she was a kook. Bu from that one day running around with John B at chapel Hill, helping him seek answers to a quest she had no idea how over our heads we were. We were just kids running around aimlessly. But I saw that treasure hunting look in his eyes; the way his eyes lit up at a map, and I mused, I admired who John B. And he made me want more for myself. 

One day; one rain kiss on the docks was all it took for the dirty blonde to feel hooked. He’s who she loved, and even with death upon us; my dad probably having a search squad on our heads. I had let the pogues down; when I had let John B go, I was angry, I was sad when I thought my dad died, and john B was just so glad to see him fall through the cracks. My dad was money hungry, he was awful he killed, he allowed Rafe to get away with Murder, but he was my dad; but now as I groggily came out of my unconscious state; I remembered the cage I felt locked in. I recalled his aim, the gun shot wound that should’ve killed me. My own father aimed the trigger, and right now Sarah knew in her gut she was a pogue, and she appreciated the friendships she made. Eyes glanced over for comfort to the boy that made her heart race. And her pinky found his; a trace of her finger against his own. 

“ I made that mistake once, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for letting you go John B, I was..” Pausing briefly before a sigh could be heard escaping her lips. “ I was hurting, I didn’t want to believe my dad was this monster. I know you said you’ve always got me, but I wouldn’t blame you if you decided no one chances.” Chances to love me, to be together after this horror war my dad had, all the times guns aimed at us because of him, a war he wanted to win on behalf of me. One he already lost. 

Because my heart; who I was, it was a pogue; my known family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I get it, Sarah. Before I came into your life and opened your eyes to who your dad and brother really are, you had a really tight bond with your dad. Naturally you’d want to fight to protect his reputation. It only makes sense that you wouldn’t want to believe your dad was capable of something like that. If the situation was reversed, and it was me in your shoes, I probably would have done the same thing as you. [I admitted honestly. It was the truth. If this was my dad, I would have fought to protect his reputation too. It’s what you do for the people you love. I’d do it for Sarah and the pogues too because I consider them my family. No matter what, I’d always have their backs, just like I know the pogues would have mine] You’ll never run out of chances with me, Sarah. I hate to break it to you, but I love you, so until you say otherwise, you’re stuck with me. [As much truth as there was in my words, I aired out that honesty with a joking tone] Anyway, for now, we just need to get your strong enough that we can move somewhere safer for the duration of your recovery. [I knew where we were would suffice for now, but it would only be a matter of time before Sarah’s dad figures out we’re hiding out here currently. We’d cross that bridge if and when the time comes. For now I wanted Sarah to get a little stronger and heal up a bit before we decide to move her]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah had always been privileged growing up. She knew of the different layers of the island. She never wanted to believe in herself to judge others; the living, how some had to work harder than others. But Sarah was guilty to pulling away when it felt messy and difficult. When someone got too close to her; she was the one guilty of running. The fear of being seen truly. It’s what happened with her friendship with Kie, and it was easy to blame the split on how John B reacted to her father’s then death. But the truth was Sarah was scared. 

Scared of letting go of the shielded life she lived, the ground beneath her gone. Her family shattered into pieces. Her dad wasn’t the man she once admired. He was a monster; he felt threatened he knew I wasn’t under the spell, and he tried to hurt me. My own brother tried to kill me, did I feel safe with my family? No I was shot because of my dad, and now I felt the numbness against my skin. The numbness that tingled the layer of my stomach; where the scars stood. I wouldn’t blame John B if he wanted to cut loses here, and leave me stranded. But I knew him his heart; the good boy inside of him; the boy I loved with every fiber inside of me. “ It’s not about him anymore. I knew who he was; he wasn’t the dad I once laughed with on the beach when I was a little girl, he knew he lied, he knew what he did, and my brother is protecting him. I’m sorry for the pain my family caused you.” The pogues hanging onto my lips. 

Hearing the words; unlimited chances hung in the air. I love you; and I loved him, I wouldn’t let the male get away from me again. Sarah tried her best to master the pain, the smile heated against brims as her hand grasped hold of his fingers. “ I love you.” words spoken as the blonde attempted to sit up using the strength of her elbows to hold her upper frame upright. But she knew staying put wasn’t an option; Ward had his minions surroundings areas; I would gasp through the pain than get caught. An intense stare hinted into my features as I spoke. “ John B.. we have to move. I can handle the pain. This island isn’t safe not with my dad, he has people..” And I knew Ward; he wanted power; to hold an angle, and us staying still didn’t feel safe; for me or the pogues.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I knew Sara was right… We had to move sooner rather than later. We were basically sitting ducks here. Ward had this whole island in his pocket, so it would only be a matter of time before he got wind of the fact that we were here. I’ll be damned if I did all this work to break Sara out of there… And then to get her the help she needed after she got shot, just for that deranged idiot to take her back to the prison he had her encamped in] Okay, if you’re sure you can handle it, we’ll move. [Worried if she busts a stitch she may bleed out though] We need to take it slow though. Be smart about this. We can’t afford you busting any stitches. If you bleed out… [I trailed off. Not even able to finish off the thought of that possibility] Let me tell JJ we’re going to move. [I said as I pressed a kiss to Sara’s forehead; letting my lips linger there for a second or two before I broke away. It was almost like I didn’t want to let her out of my sight; fearful I’d lose her] Be right back. [I promised as I briefly and reluctantly left the table she was resting on in order to find JJ, who was keeping watch just outside] We’re moving. We need to get off of this island. Alert the others. [JJ agreed; immediately pulling out his phone to message the others to get the boat ready for our momentary departure. In seeing JJ got the ball rolling on that, I returned to Sara. Preparing to move her once she gave me the okay. I still felt unsettled about us leaving, but at least night had set in, so that would give us the advantage as we used the darkness, shadows, and any alleyways we could find to our advantage] Just tell me when, and I’ll help you off the table.

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was embarrassed of who her family was now. It used to be a loving home, used to be a place of safety. The countless family dinners outside on the docks by the grills. The countless boat rides we had. The loving embraces from her dad; he used to be a home for her. And now when she thought about Ward all she felt was anger, betrayal. Someone who only cared about greed, he went out of his way to coverup a death, to frame John B, and now he even if it was an accident he shot me. I was stitched up because of him. All that to say; I didn’t want to be stuck on this island for one more minute. I was on edge, my hand touching the bandaged wound, as I felt the pain. We’re sitting ducks; Ward had his minions all over the island; it was possible he’d be hunting me down. This was a lowkey office; and I doubted this bystander of a doctor was on the payroll. 

I was aching, I didn’t want the drugs, but I also had to put the pogues first; John B first. They came to Nassau for her, Sarah didn’t care if she was limbing in pain whimpering as she sped up to walk as long as we ended up on that boat and made our way back to OBX a home, a new safety. We’d find a way to the gold; our rightful place of earnings. Sarah could see the concern written on John B’s face now, but she was okay. A smile of reassurance coming from her now. She laid kept on the metal table now, as she nodded, biting down on her lower lip to hold out on any pain. “ I promise, slow and steady wins the race.” I added with a joke, Sarah found her more humours side with him. The touch of his lips on her forehead, it made her insides turn, the butterflies now. Sarah had waited until John B had stepped outside to inform JJ before she was able to slowly sit back up. Damn the shooting pain that ran up her side. Deep breaths, Sarah was about to move to step down from the table when she heard her boyfriend, A soft brave smile came to her lips. Reaching out her hand to grasp hold of his arm for support. “ We need to move. I’m ready.” Her stitching may not be; but I could rest once we got safety; but until the docks came into view the dirty blonde wouldn’t feel at ease. 

An unsettling feeling at the pit of her stomach.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised the second I offered my help to Sarah once she was ready, she didn’t hesitate to take my hand. Anybody else would be feeling sorry for themselves and their situation, but not Sarah. She was a total bad ass. By far, the bravest person I knew. Thing was though, I hated moving her. She nearly bled out and died after being shot. Her stitches were the only thing keeping her from doing so now, so what she needed more than anything was to rest and heal. Problem was, her deranged father and his entourage of employees that would be on the look out for us. I didn’t like having to move her from here, but it was either this, or get caught by her father’s people. Neither outcome was ideal, which was why I left the final choice up to Sarah. Her answer clear as day when she held out her hand and took a hold of my arm for support] I can carry you. I’ll do the whole slow and steady thing… Taking your word on the winning the race part you joked about. [Flashing her an amused grin. Knowing now wasn’t the time for fun and jokes, but maybe we both needed a little light humor given the shitty circumstances we were facing. I silently told myself as I helped her off the metal table she was lying across and then kept a secure hold on her until she was steady on her feet] You good? [Needing to know she was okay before I made any further movements or plans]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah should’ve been more hesitant to move. Given the amount of stitches her body had to have, the amount of blood she had lost from that gunshot. The one that came from her father. Sarah if she had too much time to dwell on it would start feeling useless a burden to her own family. Because one her dad was willing to lie for Rafe, yet the innocent child like myself was left to scrape by. Pick a side, and my heart was with the pogues, with John B. And my brother was a bit deranged now, but I suppose father like son, Rafe had to get that attitude from somewhere didn’t he? 

I fought the urge to roll my eyes now. As I found that strength to lift my body up to sit and reach my feet the white tennis shoes to the ground. And I did and felt that aching pain on my lower abdomen. Where the stitches were, and as John B came to view I wore a gentle smile as I reached to brace myself for the pain as I put the weight on my feet. Fingers wrapping around his forearm you felt his muscles now as I found my courage to fully stand. “ I don’t want to make it harder for you to run, I’ll try to keep up.” A promise to my heart, but if John B and the others got hung up because of me I’d never forgive myself. The pogues were in a tough spot because of me. And I hated it, I’d rather bleed out on that table than for them to get caught. All that to say, my hand slid into his bigger palm with a squeeze. “ I’m ready, let’s meet the others.” Conviction in my tone as with an easy step started towards the exit doors; to leave, before my dad found us, before we felt in hot waters.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, I don’t want to run the risk of you popping one of your stitches and bleeding out, so we’ll take it slow and steady. Hell, if we have to crawl there to keep your safe, then so be it. [Mind you I didn’t expect either of us to crawl, obviously, but I was just trying to prove a point now. No matter what risk came to me, Sarah’s safety and well-being would always be my top focus. I silently thought to myself as I gave her hand a gentle squeeze] I’m good carrying you if that will be easier and less painful than you having to walk. [Fortunately the pier wasn’t far from here, but the problem was, we couldn’t exactly walk right down main street to get there since Sarah’s father, no doubt, had people out there looking for us. Nah, we needed to take the most discreet way possible in order to keep ourselves from getting noticed before we reach the boat that would hopefully get us the hell out of there] JJ’s right outside waiting for us… He’s already figured out a plan with the best route we should take to get to the pier where the boat’s waiting for us. [I explained as I securely and protectively held her close to me as she got on her feet; giving her a nod in reply as she gave the “okay” that she was ready] Walking or do you want me to carry you? [Knowing Sarah had an independent side to her so I figured I’d leave the decision up to her]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was fierce and strong. She felt the harbor of why us Pogues were on the run now. It was due to my father. Who had once been the apple of my eye, once been a dependable man. Once been someone I counted on, but he was the one who shot that aim. And landed me fighting for my life. Sarah was scared not that she’d say the words. She was scared of popping her own stitches now. Scared of taking a last breath. And John B he was by my side; he was a good person, even if I got angry with him from time to time. 

“ I’m okay.” An insistent of words. I’m fine. I definitely felt the wound, I felt that skin split when I stood up onto my feet. But i figured if i said the words long enough they’d be true. Sarah was a fighter; she tended to jump into the line of fire without care. And in this case; the pier wasn’t far, her idea of the island she knew it from the back of her head now. And Sarah wanted to be a leader; she wanted to feel empowered to get us pogues out of this mess. And as she stood to her feet; she nodded with a smile, genuine and sweet for him, as her hand laced through his own. “ Okay, but are we sure JJ’s plan is the best? He tends to have outcomes that come knocking on his door..” A grossome expression on her features now, as her hand made its way to his arm, as she prepared to jump on his back. “ I would love to walk John B, but my stitches, my pain level is a 10 right now, so carrying me is best..” Assuming the offer stood. I knew John B he wanted me to be comfortable. 

I was independent by nature, I had my own strength but even I felt that lower pain each time I moved, pick battles and right now I just wanted to be off my feet, and in his arms. A smile a batting of eyes now as I slowly hopped on his back legs wrapped around his waist to prepare for our trip, to the docks, to our ride home.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Eh… [I shrugged slightly in response to her question about JJ’s plan. It was a fair question. JJ was one of my best and most trusted friends, so I’d have his back no matter what, but with that aside, even I couldn’t deny that his track record with his plans working out wasn’t the best. In fact, they failed more often than not. This time around, it seemed like our only option, so even if the odds weren’t necessarily in our favor, we had to give it our best shot] It’s not a great plan, but unfortunately our only option currently. [I confessed. Knowing I couldn’t ever lie to Sarah] In his defense, this seems to be one of his better and more thought out plans, so fingers crossed. [No, that answer wasn’t ideal, or even all that convincing, but again, I couldn’t lie to Sarah. That’s how I felt, so it was a run like hell and hope for the best type of plan right now] Okay, I’ve got you. No matter what. [I assured Sarah as I carefully lifted her up from the floor and into my more than capable arms; cradling her protectively close to me as we cautiously exited the warehouse, met up with JJ who was keeping watch for us right around the corner, and then we started toward the dark alleyways and vacant roadways in an effort to go as unnoticed as possible as we raced like hell toward the boat where the rest of our friend group was waiting]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah had leaped into the pogue life. She had leaped into the trust for John B. She was back to stepping outside of the bubble wrap. It was rushed up adrenaline, it was the adventure, but in this point in time Sarah was scared. Her father had shot at her; the man she once thought stood on a pedestal was the man responsible for her injury. The blood stain through her sweater, the man who put gates over her windows to prevent her from leaving. He grew up on the cut, he transformed his life; he had wealth now. I once admired him, but now when I thought of his face I felt this twirling in my stomach as if my stomach was dropping. 

I was achy, my lower abdomen was in pain, the drugs, the stitching was only going to hold for so long. I knew JJ his lack of track record had spoken for themselves, and I saw that not so trusting expression cross the male’s face even for a split second. But as we established out time was limited before the streets would be swarming with guards, with police, as my father as the huntsmen. I had to swallow any doubt I had, and believe in the only option us pogues had. With a short less than confident bob of my head, the blonde had slipped her arms around John B’s neck, leaning her head on his shoulder, the comfort of his hold. And She wrapped her slander legs around his waist once her grip was in solid ground, she braced herself for the race against time. 

Alleyways with the boys, the short cuts and I had pointed ahead to the marina, where I knew our little boat would be waiting. “ Just straight ahead.” I whispered as if I once grew up here; on this soil summer nights at the beach, late nights on the boats enjoying the sun going down, watchful moons. And now we’re running away; to where? Outer Banks which was once paradise on earth. Hearing from the distant alarms rang off in my head. 

Cops? Worrisome laid out on my face. Let’s hope the others had the rope in hand and ready to back into the ocean the second we landed on the boat.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

No matter what, we’ll figure it out. That’s one thing about the Pogues… Are track record and planning aren’t always great, but we always find a way to get our asses out of trouble. [I joked. Not that this was a time for jokes or quips but I figured Sarah wouldn’t mind the a slight break from the stress and obvious worry she was feeling currently] Besides, when plan A doesn’t work, we’ve got like twenty-five other letters to work through. [I said optimistically while a smirk creased my lips. JJ leading the way; pausing briefly to as we came to openers to make sure nobody was around to catch up before he’d signal with his hand for us to continue] We’re close… [I murmured more so to myself in relief as I saw the waterway approaching. I was eerily confident that if we could make it to the boat without getting caught, that’d we’d be home-free to get the hell away from this island. Sure, I knew it wouldn’t be as easy as I was optimistically trying to write it off as, but I wasn’t anything if not hopeful. Besides, I couldn’t let anything happen to Sarah, so I’d do whatever I needed to in order to get her out of here safely]

[ofnotakook]

Which was true. All joking aside, the pogues had a way of wording or acting themselves out of trouble. The amount of times they’ve nearly gotten themselves thrown in jail and survived. Sarah wasn’t worried about the backup plans, nor was she concerned about putting her trust out in John B. Because she’d trust him with her life. 

It was the sirens, it was alerts that kept cycling through her head. Her fingers held tightly onto John B she swore he felt her grip through his shirt. All that to say, Sarah was nervous. She also knows the island, and her father. He didn’t do well with losing, and when he didn’t have the princess Kook on his side; it was safe to say the man got nervous. And the dirty blonde wasn’t a trophy to be tossed around. Sarah was smart, had her own mind. And this game, this idea that he could steal from the pogues, fake his death it rubbed her wrongly. “ I trust you.” Was all the female was able to muster. Before the crashing of waves were heard, the docks in the clear. I spotted our little boat, the pogues, as Kie waved us over. Leaning my head closer into his neck, I pressed a small kiss to his neck as I leaned my face into him, a smile blossoming on my lips. 

Home free, and as our shoes hit the dock, inches away from the rope of our friends, I spotted the police car, a horn sounded to stop. “ Go.” I said as I aired out with urgency, because it was run or flight, and there’s no way my injury was for nothing. 

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I couldn’t help but to smile when I heard Sarah confess that she trusts me. It boded well for me that she did because let’s be honest, our plans were far from successful the majority of the time. Let’s hoped this latest plan wouldn’t be one of those failed missions. Either way, though, I wasn’t going down without a fight. Especially knowing I held Sarah’s life in my hands right now, too] I got you. [I replied reassuringly as I heard her urgency for us to go. At that, I didn’t hesitate to pick up my pace toward the boat where Kie was waving us down. JJ got into the boat first, then offered his help as I carried Sarah and I into the boat. Fortunately for us, Pope had already started up the boat] Everyone lay low… Let’s get out of here without anyone seeing our faces. [I instructed. It was a fifty-fifty shot that someone would recognize Pope, Kie, or JJ, but Sarah and I definitely needed to keep ourselves low and out of notice at all costs. We were close now… About to put some necessary space between us and Sarah’s father, so we couldn’t blow it now. I thought to myself as I grabbed some towels I found on the floor of the boat and covered Sarah and I with them as Pope put the boat into gear and worked to get us out of this harbor as quickly yet subtly as possible. The key now was to avoid bringing any unnecessary attention to us so we had to remain low and act as naturally as we could]

[ofnotakook]

Our relationship may had felt on the edge of late, the split heavily on our minds, a lack of empathy, a lack of care to others feelings. But when push came to shover John B was a protector, he was someone I trusted to keep me safe, that I was in safe hands if I wasn’t able to take care of myself. Her father used to be an important person to her; but every time we spoke now it was like talking to a wall. He only cared about the gold the money he stole from the pogues. Sarah didn’t believe a word Ward said, plus he locked her up like she was a prisoner instead of his own daughter. Not to mention her little sidekick the bandage on her lower hip was a gift from dear old dad. 

Her family wasn’t hers anymore, it was unhinged, unsteady. She was nearly killed by two members of her own family, blood shed it stayed with her, as fear now built inside of her. Sarah wanted safety, and as she heard the reassurance in the male’s voice her arms securely tighten around his neck as he ran like hell to get to the boat. The roared engine of the boat was faith, With her body slowly hitting the deck of the boat, she quickly laid herself down against the floorboards, towels came down on top of John B and herself; eyes pried on us. Yet our friends no attention was drawn upon them. Sirens getting closer as she felt the boat movement, her hand instinctively had reached for John B under the towels, as a deep breathing of exhale came and went. 

Pope behind the wheel as the boat moved from the dock, JJ being JJ you could hear his own amusement as he aired out “ Have a great day.” To the officers I assumed and you could hear Kie swat his arm of disappointing nature. A roll of my eyes under the towels now, as we waited for the call; the indication we were safe. Our boat swayed against the ocean blues, swiftly. All we needed was a sign; ensure the threat was in our rearview mirror.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I flashed JJ an amused smirk and a head shake when I heard his cocky remark to the officers while you could practically hear Pope’s heart pounding rapidly as he pushed firmer on the throttle to get more distance between the boat and the marina. None of that mattered now though. Sarah was safe… At least for now, and I fully intended to keep it that way. Now it was only a matter of reaching a place where we could get Sarah the medical attention she likely needed, but her father and deranged family wouldn’t find out about it. More than anything, I just wanted Sarah and the others safe. Her father knew a lot of people though, so it was going to be a challenge, to say the least. Given all the challenges and hell the pogues have been through over the years, I was confident we had this one too. Let’s hope my confidence would pay off this time around]

[ofnotakook]

The rapid sounds of her beating heart. The worry, the fear that we’d be discovered. The towels were enough to cover when our bodies felt stiff, down low, the hardness of the boards of the flooring of the boat hitting my back. My body was aching, we just ran like hell, Well more like John B did, the champ he was. Sarah felt guilty for the position john B, the man she loved was in, and the pogues her found family. 

Ward, he played the act well. He played the act of a loving father who would bring no harm, and as a little girl I laughed with hm, I hugged him and felt safe. And now as I felt that obvious weakness in my lower abdomen, I felt like I had no idea who he was, the lengths he was willing to go to win. I had vaguely listened on to JJ and his smart remarks, not to mention Pope who obviously was exhaling deeply. Once I had felt the tug at the bottom of layers of towels, Kie had whispered “ Your good, we’re far enough.” And I didn’t know i was holding my breath, that I was a near wreck of fear until the confided space, until the material was lifted off my face and I exhaled. I looked up at the blue skies, and I turned to John B, my hand had reached over to brush against his. “ Thank you, all of you. “ And I knew I had come up short here and there the conflict between the pogues and my family; but I was confident i’d be welcomed back with open arms. 

Slowly sitting up, I had held the bandaged wound as I exhaled to avoid a whine on my lips. “ I’m sorry my dad my family are assholes, but I am on your side, and i’ll do whatever we have to do to get that upper hand again.” As to where this landed us, not a clue. Because the cross was gone, the gold gone, us on a boat my family’s boat might I add, sailing the ocean, and no idea where we go next. A forced smile on bare lips. What else could go wrong?

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Once Kie called that the coast was clear, we peeled the toweled off of us. My eyes immediately drifted to Sarah in concern. Aside from her rapidly beating heartbeat, which at the moment, I could also relate to, she seemed to be okay… Well, “okay” being a vague definition currently since she was just shot a short while ago] Hey, you’re more Pogue than you are Kook, and us Pogues take care of each other. [I reminded her. I knew JJ always bounced back and forth with this one. One minute he was consider Sarah one of us and seemed accepting, and in the next he was reminding me who her family is and I’d be smart to cut her loose. Knowing JJ, he’d weigh in at some point on how he felt about all of this. Sure, I’m guessing he enjoyed the rush of breaking her out, getting shot at, and then running for our lives, but he’d also probably harbor some bitterness since he’d blame Sarah for us having to do that in the first place. No matter where he stood, Sarah was in my life, and as long as she had me, I’d be in hers too, so like it or not, JJ would have to come to terms with that] “We can’t pick our families. Trust me, if we could, I’d choose literally anyone but my own father to be my father.” [JJ said in response and I nodded agreeably. The point being, it wasn’t Sarah’s fault. She couldn’t help that her family was deranged] You’re safe now. We all are. That’s what matters. [Were we though? Would we ever be fully safe knowing Ward was still out there? The man didn’t like to lose, and we just took his daughter from him, so I had a sinking feeling it would only be a matter of time before he struck again]

[ofnotakook]

Fear peeled out at you. Fear was the emotion that controlled you to stay. And Sarah wasn’t scared of her father, she wasn’t scared that he was the one who shot her. She wasn’t scared that Rafe had once attempted to drown her. Her family was deranged because of fear, fear that she’d talk, that she’d turn on her own family. But the guilt the pressure she felt on her chest, was for John B and the pogues. They got caught in the crosshairs because of her; because of her family. 

And even as she found her heartbeat steadying out now; the female was slowly standing to her feet slightly wobbly. Was it from the active moving boat? Maybe or it was because she felt unsteady. As she had her balance now, she smiled to herself; because despite it all, John B still considered her a pogue, and she felt her hand into her pockets, where she felt that sting of his bandana, the one she had gotten back outside her massive house; and she offered a delighted smile to him as she held out the bandana to him; and she asked the obvious “ Want to do the honors, A pogue for life?” It for a second felt as if we were in a bubble, like JJ hadn’t been speaking to me, about our dislike for our families, and I felt like we were frozen in time, and the cards were in John B’s hands now. 

We’re on a boat, no idea if we’re heading back to the outer banks, or if we were gonna wait it out now. And I knew in my heart; I wasn’t the kook princess anymore, I was a pogue, and this was me saying goodbye to that life.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I didn't know where Pope was taking the boat now, but I had a feeling it was nowhere near Outer Banks. He wouldn't return there because that would be the first place Ward came to look for Sarah. Nah, Pope was smart, so he'd pick someplace Ward would never think to look for us. I smiled when I saw Sarah pull out the bandana. It meant a lot to me that she kept it after all this time. "You still have it?" Even though I worded it in the form of a question, it was meant more to be a statement mixed with relief and surprise. "A pogue for life." I repeated her words as I took the bandana from her grasp and wrapped it around her before tying off the end to keep it in place. "There you go, my little pogue." I added with a slight grin.

[ofnotakook]

I can always trust in you

@apogueforlife 

I can always trust in you 

Trust; it had to be earned. Love; it had to be developed. For Sarah she always had her guard up. Each time she’d get close to letting someone in the other shoe would drop, she’d freeze up, and run in the other direction. With each boyfriend she ever had she had the urge to run. To distant herself when she felt like she was trapped. When she felt the pressure to feel more than what she did. Topper he liked the idea of her. He loved the idea of being with her; but he wasn’t in love with her. 

There’s only one boy Sarah loved; and that was John B. It happened unexpectedly. It happened on a day she never saw coming. That day stayed with her. The day we went to chapel hill; the day we had fun dressing each other up. The day we pretended to be our alter egos; Val and Vlad. It was nice to be herself. I didn’t feel the pressure to be perfect. I didn’t feel like my family was watching me, I was myself. I felt safe, I felt like John B saw me despite all the flaws I had. He loved me for me, and I loved him. It was a roller coaster of a relationship if you asked me. We had gone from barely knowing each other; to falling completely utterly in love. I gave up my kook card for him. I knew the obsluces we’d be facing now, the pogue’s vs the kook. But nothing made me question my loyalty to him. To the Pogues. It got messy with my dad; him being the reason Big John was gone. The reason why the gold was taken. The reason I was on the run with John B. The gold felt so close yet so far. We managed to clear John B’s name but that’s because Ward decided in his best interest to fake his own death and act like the hero. The guy that claimed to have been a killer in order to protect his own son. Rafe just the thought of being near him made me sick to my stomach. For a second I was upset, I felt like my whole body ached when I witnessed the boat blow up. When I witnessed my father shatter beyond the sea. And that’s when I saw the truth; what led to us being torn apart; what led to John B and I no longer being together. He had been happy to ward dead; and I couldn’t exactly find the words to blame him. He took everything from him. But at the end of the day; he was my dad. I was hurting and I remembered that look all too well; the look of proudnessI felt like I was seeing another person. I was grieving the dad I once looked up to, to the dad that I was once his princess. I needed John B to hold me, to make me feel like it was always going to be okay. But it suddenly felt like us it wasn’t meant to be.. 

Walking away for yourself; was all you could do. It was hard to be near him; to be pulled back into the adventure; to the cross. But for Pope I’d be there; awkwardness assured. Sarah didn’t know if she should make eye contact with him; or just stay silent. Silence seemed better; until that night; we had a plan to get the cross from Rafe; the big truck was parked outside my house. JJ and Pope were hidden behind the bushes. I was determined to walk inside; to get the key to unlock the truck; how we’d get the heavy cross out was a big ass story of it’s own. But I had made two steps to the gates, one glance backwards; I saw him John B was about to get up; and for a second I found myself hopeful; maybe this was the moment of the unknown. What comes next? Dark hues met for a second and I swore the air was taken out of my lungs; but he didn’t budge, didn’t move. Giving me the indication we had nothing left to say. That was the last memory I had of him; of us staring at each other. 

Head leaned against the gated up windows of my room at the barbados house, The house I was locked into. The boat felt like a nightmare; I was drugged by my own family. Rose had put a drug in my tea. Rafe and had helped her execute the plan; to force me here against my will. I remembered telling Ward when he claimed John B only cared about the treasure about the gold that I was just stuck in the cross hair that he was wrong. That John b would find him and come for him once I went missing. How wrong had I been? I wanted to blink back the tears that dared to fall. I was a pogue at heart; I chose it for John B because I loved him, despite our differences he’d always have a permanent place in my heart. It had been weeks since we left on the boat, I had tried to zone out the conversations of my parents; I had pretended to be sleeping at times, but here once I had been pulled into my room I never left. I guess Ward was afraid I’d run, or threaten to tell the cops his own daughter was kidnapped against her will. Give or take. Sarah swallowed the lump in her throat; it had gotten dark. She smelt the tray of food that her sister left her outside the door. Her bed was an inch away; The light pink covers still in place, it had been a day or two since we arrived, and I had slept in my bed because that meant i was okay, that meant that I was adjusting to being here; in this house. When all I wanted was to break free. At the window, on the seat where my back was pressed against the wall. Head tilted towards the window, I could see the water; any boats that passed by. I was alone; and all I could hope was that the Pogue’s were okay that perhaps my dad was right they managed to get the cross and that’s all that mattered for Pope. Eyes moved to the stars; for a moment it was nice to believe we were looking at the same stars; as if John B was on his way; assuming my dad was lying. For now all I could do was hold hope; I’d find a way out; it was a done deal. 

Tomorrow; I’d work out a plan. The Pogues would have me, if I found him. We’d always have each other. A wistful thought as a hint of a smile tainted onto my lips.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Love. Definitely not something I ever believe really existed. I always saw it more as, in life, people come and go. The ones who matter will stick with you, through thick and thin. For me, that was the Pogues: JJ, Kie, and Pope. I don’t remember a time in my life when those three weren’t part of it, and something tells me, I’ll never shake them either. Not that I’d want to, cause they’re everything to me. Then Sarah Cameron busted into my life unexpectedly… One of those surprising moments where I got myself in a sticky situation, and Sarah Cameron, of all people, was the one who bailed me out of it. Even more surprising though was how I felt when I was with her. It was the first time in my life when I found myself wanting to be with a girl exclusively. In time she even made me rethink my original theory about love. Then, well, I guess you could say life happened, and we broke up. Sure, I knew I played a part in our break up. When her father died, I should have been more supportive of the toll that loss would take on Sarah. Yeah, the guy was bad news… A lying crook, which Sarah obviously knew too, but he was still her father. Given the bad blood I had with Ward, and also the fact that he murdered my father, could you really blame me for being relieved that the guy was finally gone? Right or wrong, it’s how I felt. This leading to the end of Sarah’s and my relationship. Still, in my heart I knew this wasn’t the end for us. A love like ours always finds a way back to one another. Naïve or not, I refused to see it any other way…

Then weeks passed and I was starting to wonder if it really had been the end for us. Mind you, I still wasn’t giving up, but instead of dwelling on what may or may not happen between me and Sarah, instead the Pogues and I focused on getting the cross back for Pope. It actually became a, “Kill two birds with one stone” type of adventure for us though, since word got to me that Sarah had been abducted by her family. Them ultimately boarding a ship with Sarah and the cross, allegedly heading to Barbados; knowing that was exactly where we would be going to. This was it… This was our chance to, not only help Pope get the cross back, but also for me to rescue Sarah too…

Given that us Pogues had made some enemies, and also the fact that we didn’t have so much as a pot to piss in, much less money to travel to Barbados, it took some work, a lot of time, and even more creativity on our parts before we finally reached Barbados. Once we did, I knew we needed to devise a plan to get back both Sarah and the cross. Of course JJ, as usual, came up with one of the worst plans I had ever heard. This saying a lot considering JJ’s had some really shitty plans, over the years. This one pretty much topped the other bad plans he’s had though; prompting all of us to shoot down his plan and come up with another one. Knowing it was either come up with a better plan, or go with JJ’s plan which will likely either get us all killed, or at the very least, we’ll end up locked up in some jail cell. In time we did come up with a new plan. Not a great one, but definitely better than JJ’s plan, so it was something, at least. For our part we decided one step at a time…

We’d wait till night, rescue Sarah first, and then once we had her safely out of that house and away from her deranged family, we’d devise a plan to get the cross back. I mean, it’s not like we could just knock on the front door, and request either. Not without being shot, that is. We couldn’t even break in and steal the cross without getting caught, since it was so damn heavy, it was going to take a hell of a lot of brute strength to carry it, so we’d just deal with that plan later. For now, my focus was on Sarah. Sure, I knew there was a chance I’d be the last person she’d want to see tonight, but given me and the Pogue’s rescuing her, or her remaining a hostage with her own family, I figured I was the lesser of the evils, so to speak. I justified as Kie and Pope remained look outs from the ground; keeping hidden to the garden area where they tried to remain unseen, while JJ and I went to the roof. With JJ’s help, he hoisted me down onto the balcony I had scoped out and learned led to the bedroom they were keeping Sarah locked in. Once I approached the balcony window, I peaked inside discreetly; making sure her family was nowhere in sight before I gave a couple of light taps on the window. My way of alerting Sarah that I was here. Of course the window was pad-locked, which just pissed me off more. How could they do this to Sarah? The Cameron’s definition of family was nothing more than a load of bullshit, if you ask me, because this isn’t how you treat family. I thought in building anger as I used the pin I had with me to trigger the lock. Once I heard it click, my eyes shifted up toward JJ. The thumbs up he gave me in reply assuring me he had cut the security system like he confidently told me he could easily handle. This was JJ, so although I’d trust him with my life, and well, I had a few times, I still held my breath as I slowly and gingerly opened the window; expelling a quiet sigh of relief when an alarm didn’t sound as I opened the window] Val…? [I quietly whispered her code name into the dark bedroom. Hoping it would soften any resentment she might have in seeing me here now] Vlad and the crew are here to spring you from here… [I further whispered into the dark bedroom as I waited for her to come over to the window; knowing we didn’t have long before someone would alert the Cameron’s that the security system had been hacked into, so the sooner we got out of there, the better our chances of getting out of here alive]

[ofnotakook]

The pogue plans never went according to plan. Not that Sarah was going to complain now considering. She was able to escape the bars that locked her into her old bedroom. She was tired of starving herself out of spite. She was tired of laying awake at night in fear that she might be dragged out of bed. She was tired of being forced to live the perfect life. Forced to smile for her parents; the only one in her family she liked was her sister Wheezie, she’s who I wanted to protect. But she had young opinions, didn’t see what our family was capable of. And given how much risk John B went through to find me, I had to go with him. Not that I wanted to stay trapped or that I’d risk his life to save my sister. 

I felt torn with myself now. I escaped; I was on the roof; I had survived the lies, I had survived my own father aiming a gun at me; of course to his unknown knowledge Ward did exceed in his aiming and catching fire on one of us. I doubted his attention was to hurt me. Yet again it felt like a toss up considering, he did try to strangle me to death; and drugged me to get onto that stupid boat. But I knew him to know the problem wasn’t my stubbornness, it was John B and the pogues. He was threatened, and right now the Camerons wasn’t my family; it was the pogues. I had chose them a long time ago weather I wanted to admit it or not. 

Safe; is what I felt; despite the pain that was pooling on my side; the white sweater was making it difficult to hide. But I felt his kiss; the graze of his lips on my head, a tenderness of who we were. A love language for us. Seeing as JJ had followed my lead; and started down the ladder; I had stepped forward turning my back to where my hues fell on the male I loved with all my heart. Despite our differences that did come to light when I uttered the words maybe we weren’t meant to be, to work out. 

A soulfulness in my stare as I uttered my words. “ Promise you’ll come down.” I mouthed the words “ I can’t lose you.” As my palm wasn’t already filled with my own blood. Taking my hand from side, I placed them firmly on the handles of the ladder, with one step and than the next. I caught sight of the droplets of blood hitting the ladder as I climbed down, It wasn’t until I reached the bottom, I felt JJ; place his hand on my hip in order to help me off when he wore this stunned expression. “ Sarah.” He mouthed, I knew he felt it; the blood that now covered his hand; I shook my head. “ Don’t say a word.” I had strength I’d be okay until I couldn’t walk anymore; He was about to say something when I hit him in the chest. 

John B would be in earshot; I couldn’t tell him yet; once we were in the clear I’d tell him, but I didn’t want him to worry about me, not after all the risks he took to save me. Pushing myself to the side, I eyed the small area where our feet hit the grass; Kie and Pope had to make it to the gates; where it led to the waterfront it was our get away. Our only glimmer of hope.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I promise. I’ll be right behind you. [I assured Sarah as I watched JJ go down the ladder first, to ensure it was safe for Sarah to follow. Once JJ gave the “all clear” signal, I gave Sarah and nod to begin descending the ladder] You’ll be okay. JJ will meet you at the bottom, and I won’t be far behind. [I reminded her as she started to descend the ladder. I ducked down lower to the roof as I heard the sound of more gunshots looming in the air. Once Sarah was about halfway down the ladder, I started to position myself onto the ladder; getting a good grip on the sides before I slowly began descending the ladder too. It wasn’t long before I could faintly hear Sarah and JJ safely at the bottom on the ground below the ladder, and I was following them moments later. After I reached the bottom, I noticed the concerned look JJ was giving me, but assuming it had something to do with the fact that we were all still in danger on the Cameron’s grounds, I didn’t question JJ on his strange look. Instead, I snaked my arm gently and protectively around Sarah’s shoulder; gently tugging her closer to me before speaking up in a hushed volume] Okay, we made it this far, which is great, but we’re not out of danger yet. Let’s get to Pope and Kie, and then all of us get the hell out of here. [I suggested before nodding my head toward JJ; gesturing for him to lead the way. The sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better our chances would be of us surviving this]

[ofnotakook]

He’d be right behind me. It was a sense of comfort knowing I wasn’t alone.That I was nearly to safety but the question lingered of how long. Because I felt the bleeding on my hip, I felt the lost of blood that peeled from my skin. Not that Sarah was about to utter a word. If she did their plan of escaping would be jeopardized. And JJ and John B had risked it all for her. Kie and Pope were on the lower ground taking cover on her behalf. Sarah wasn’t selfish; she knew when to take one for the team. Her dad; his shots that were fired. It was venages for her; for the Pogues brainwashing her; but the truth was Sarah saw beneath the scars. She saw the truth. The perfect knit family wasn’t real. She had hoped her father would be okay; that he would let her go. Let the pogues go give John B what was rightfully his. 

But instead he saw me as property. I wasn’t a person to him. I was his daughter yes; but I also was my own mind and heard. All that to say I tried not to shake when I heard the gunshots in the distance. I had my hands holding onto the ladder as JJ slowly helped me down. Blood it was obvious at the edge of the ladder; I easily shook my head to JJ; indicating John B didn’t need to know. I was fine. I Swore I caught an edge of concern against his expression. Did JJ care? I asked myself as feet hit the pavement; the edge of the roof as we lowered ourselves down to the ground. His arm was comfort; he was there with me every step of the way. 

Reaching up with my cleared hand; I intertwined my palm with his own. Above my shoulder as I forced a smile. “ almost there.” I whispered as i felt the throbbing on my side; the dripping of redness down my leg; I just hoped it was dark enough to hide. Enough to give us a clear out before I had to say the words. I was shot; a haunting thought as I saw Kie and Pope in sight. 

“ Once we step down one last step, run to the gates, there’s a boat waiting okay. I’ll get the keys.” I told myself it was a solid plan; despite my obvious discomfort to myself. I leaned up to press a kiss to John B’s hand lips against his thumb before I gave the nod to Kie and Pope. 

It was time to run; it was our only chance; even if it meant the Pogues leaving without me; I could handle my injury and my dad; but John B needed an escape or his life was at risk; and right now I cared less about me and more about his safety. “ Run.” Whispered as hands released his own as my body heavily dropped to the ground. Shots being fired; I leaned down enough to swat; to hide under until the walkway cleared.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I gave a nod of relief to Sarah and JJ once our feet finally hit the pavement below. Sure, I knew we still had a challenge ahead of us, even more of one now that Ward knew I had taken Sarah, so I guarantee he wasn’t the only one firing a gun currently. Now we had him, and his whole damn security department firing at us, too. Regardless, we made it this far, which to some, seemed like an impossible feat in and of itself, but we’re still alive, so that’s something. I justified optimistically as Sarah told us the next part of the plan. Good thing we managed to get her out, because JJ nor I had come up with an escape plan. In normal pogue fashion, we planned to wing it once we reached the point… You know, assuming that we made it this far, I should say] Okay, babe. [I said as I heard her instruct us to “run,” and then she released my hand. Given how close I had already come to losing her, I wasn’t about to let her out of my sight; especially in a dangerous situation like this. With that protective thought in mind, I hadn’t run far before realizing she was no longer at my side, or even behind me] Sarah? Sarah, where are you? [I asked in a hushed volume as I started to back track to find her. It didn’t take me long before I nearly tripped over her as she laid down onto the ground] What are you doing? Are you okay? [Assuming maybe she tripped and hurt herself or something, which is why she didn’t get up and continue running with us. Either way, I waited for the latest bout of gun shots to fade out before I helped Sarah up from the ground. This time snaking my arm around her to keep her close as we prepared to catch up with the others] Can you walk? [Prepared to carry her on my back if she was hurt and couldn’t run. Whatever it took to get Sarah safely out of here, I was all for doing it. Sarah’s safety and freedom was my top priority right now]

[ofnotakook]

A getaway plan; honestly Sarah could easily say she had the grounds of the priority mapped out in her head. But the times she’s visited this house she could count on her hand. It was slim; but right now she had to save herself or she risked the chance of Ward getting his hooks not just in her; but it put the pogues in danger. The same people who risked their lives in order to save her. Sarah didn’t take it for granted; she knew she was a mess. She was someone who was torn between love and her family. But she was locked in her own room on more than one occasion. Her father proved he only cared about the gold. It stung; it made Sarah feel like shit; like she wasn’t enough for her own father. 

But now wasn’t the time; the end was near. She felt her knees wobbly, she felt the lost of blood elevate against her frame. Feet planted against the pavement; her eyes scanned the grounds until they reached Kie and Poper who had keys in their hands; they found the keys to the boat under one of my rocks. It was kinda my getaway car back in the day when I wanted to be reckless; I wanted an escape; apparently it was my younger self telling me to be prepared. Because right now our best bet was to run. Run through the pavements; the mountains of trees to get to the edge. I whispered the words. JJ didn’t need any admission; he ran like hell while guns were being fired. Fired at us; which is why I ducked. Not voluntarily; I had fallen to my knees. I had fell right to the ground. I felt my lungs closing off; I felt the air in my body slowly leaving, as I felt my frame hit the ground in a huff. 

I knew John B; he’d never leave without me. I was kinda surprised he hadn’t picked up on the trail of blood I left on the roof; the ladder in my wake. But to my surprise my secret was that a secret. Eyes closed growing heavy that was until I felt his hands roll onto my own palms. Fingers curled around his hands as I slowly pushed myself back onto my feet. “ I’m okay.” A fat lie I screamed at myself. The dirty blonde moved in the threes; in the brushes; her sneakers ran across the lawn until she heard her feet against the pavement. “ John B.. If I fall behind I need you to run like hell okay.” A demand not an ask. The female whispered in a low tone as fingers tighten around his palm. “ I was shot..’ The words stuck on her tongue as she paused; glancing down to her hip; her hip where there was a big ass stain of redness under her sweater; the white sweater now red; she bit down on her lip in fear; and now she’d be the reason they got caught; from running for their lives. 

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what, I would never leave Sarah behind. She was everything to me. Including my favorite pain in the ass that I argued with like we were already a married couple. Point is, I loved Sarah more than life itself, and even though things were a bit up in the open currently between us, that didn’t matter, because I would always come for her. Case and point when I saw her drop down and without a second thought or hesitation, I went back for her and then waited until she was ready to move before we continued our escape. My face turned pale though as I could feel the blood leaving my cheeks when I heard her confession about being shot] What? You were shot? [Quietly repeating the words back to myself, as if trying to process it, but also hoping that I had heard her wrong and she’d correct me now. Judging by the blood I saw that had stained her shirt, I knew I hadn’t imagined it. My worst nightmare was happening now in the fact that Sarah was hurt] It’s going to be okay. I’ll get you out of here and then we’ll get you help. [I assured her. No way in hell of knowing if she was going to be okay or not. I mean, she was shot. With a bullet. She was bleeding, and I had no way of knowing how much blood she’s lost already, because I was just now hearing she was hurt] Let’s get you on my back, and I’ll carry you out of here. [My way of letting her know that, no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her behind, so this way, if we get caught, we’re going to do so together. I silently justified as I squatted down as low as I could, so Sarah didn’t have to strain too much to shift onto my back]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s family was the why the Pogue’s were in this mess. The why we were fighting for our life’s. Namely the finger needed to be pointed towards my father. The man who wanted to be a proud family man, adoring father was willing to aim guns at his own daughter. He chose a hell of a long time ago. I wasn’t the kook anymore; I was a pogue; the family I decided I wanted. My pure love and adoration for John B. He was my everything. The boy I wanted to bicker with day and night. The boy I wanted to run on adventures with. He understood me, I never felt alone with him; I never felt like I had to pretend. I always felt trapped, the need to run from how I felt those strong feelings until I met him. Until we kissed; and fell insanely in love. 

And this island; the gold being unreachable now; was on me. I was the one who believed in my dad; kept opening my mouth and claiming he loves me, he’d never hurt me. I was the fool a disgrace not only had my brother tried to kill me drown me, my own dad wanted me dead. I had nothing but John B and the pogue’s. They were all I needed. 

Each leg of movement was starting to cause a strain on my body. I had no issues running; it was the open wound on my abdomen that was preventing me from moving fast enough. Knees weak, I could barely keep up. I heard the others in a distant reach the boat; the boat that was gassed up; the keys I knew where they were hidden the backup keys I mean. I remembered going out on this boat as a child; for our family trips on the ocean. What an embarrassing moment now considering. Leaning over my frame; eyes staring at the grass that touched my ankles. Head moving to stare between my legs in order to catch my panting breaths. I felt weak, I said the words. And I swore I heard John B stop; he paused in disbelief but the writing was pooling down my legs; the droplets of blood obvious. Tilting my head up I bit down on my lower lip to hold in the whine the pain of my wound. “ John B..” Name lingered on my tongue as tried to find the how I’d get this boy to leave without me. Instead he decided to bend down to the ground. I hesitated, I didn’t want to hold him back. “ I..” I started but I also know this boy; he’d risk it all for me. It didn’t make sense for both of us to risk being caught here, but with last minute thinking I pulled myself onto his back. Arms wrapped loosely around his neck. Legs wrapping around his waist, once I was safely on his back I rested my head on his shoulder. “ You can move now..” I echoed in a nearly teasing retort. Keep it light; until we escaped. 

A death trap of my own making.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what happened, I would never leave Sarah behind. I wasn’t stupid. I knew us breaking into her family’s compound tonight to break her out was a death trap. It was a fool’s errand, but I didn’t care. Sarah was in danger. She might not see how deranged her father and brother are, but I knew. I saw first-hand what her psychotic father was capable of, so I wouldn’t put anything past him now. Including him hurting his own daughter just to ensure he kept her far away from me. The man was a damn lunatic and the sooner I got Sarah away from him, the better off she’d be. The driving reason I broke into her room tonight. Well, “prison” was probably a more fitting word given the bars her father had put on her windows, so she could be kept there as his prisoner. Asshole. I thought in disdain as we ran toward some semblance of safety. I stopped though when I realized Sarah was no longer behind me. Panic setting in since it was dark, which made it difficult to see. Following the sounds of her breaths and rustling through the grass as I back-tracked back toward her. Shock and fear washing over me in hearing she had been shot. A part of me wondering if taking her back to her father was the best course of action, since his ties and pull could have a doctor here in moments. Still, something told me she wouldn’t want to go back there. She’d choose to take the risk to keep moving] I’ve got you. Don’t worry. I’d never leave without you, Sarah. [I assuredly whispered out as I helped her get situated safely on my back; ensuring her arms were wrapped tightly around my neck and her legs secured around my waist before I started through the trees and such in search of JJ and the others] “John B? Where the hell are you?” [I heard the familiar sound of JJ’s voice airing out nearby in a hushed tone. Moving in the direction of his voice, I eventually caught up with them. Keeping Sarah securely on my back as we reached them] “Ready for the next part of the plan? The diversion?” [JJ asked with pride in his voice, which prompted a skeptical look from me. All of us knowing JJ wasn’t the best at plans, but I did feel better when Pope and Kie chimed in to share that they had actually helped with this part of the plan] If it gets us out of here, then hell yeah, do it! [I muttered out as I watched JJ throw a lit flare in the direction of the wooded area we had all just escaped from, before throwing two others in separate directions of the same wooded area. Listening and watching as I saw a small explosion go off, followed by another, and then countless more. Pope and Kie explaining they rigged those while they were waiting for us to break Sarah out. Chuckling in pride and feeling a momentary sense of victory as I realized we temporarily stopped Ward’s guards from catching up; prompting us to continue running the remaining way off of the compounds and then into the city. Now it was just a matter of finding a place to hide out and to get Sarah medical attention] Sarah was shot, so we need to get her to a doctor before we do anything else. [I explained to the others; watching the wheels practically turning in their head on how to work this one out without all of us ending up getting caught]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s greatest fear was her friends, was the boy she loved getting hurt on her behalf. She always believed in the good in her father; that he had made mistakes. But when it came to their family he always held their best interest at heart. But all the evidence was staked against him. He faked his own death; he was okay with putting his arms around my neck. He was okay with shooting a bullet not knowing where it land. And Sarah was caught in that crossfire. She was scared that her now slow pace would hurt the pogues in the end. Her new Family. And she knew better than to fight with John B, than to plead with him to keep going without her. He’d never leave her behind. He was noble, he was the man that loved her more than his own life. 

And she’d risk it all for him too. He was the light in her new darkness. Sarah tried to hide it; the trail of blood she now kept behind her. She held the wound to her hip as tightly as she could; until she fell. She fell forward breathing heavily feeling the impact of loss blood. She was trying to move forward in the deep grass; but her feet stopped. She had hoped the male had moved far enough forward to forget; about her. But his voice was like a compass calling her home. And she had to smile to herself as she pulled herself onto his back. Bitting down on her lip knowing she was in pain; that pain in her side, the pool of blood that was now hitting his shirt. Head slowly came to rest on his shoulder; weakness inside of her. “ I know..” She whispered in a weakened tone. She held on for dear life; she had her arms wrapped around his neck, and her legs slid around his waist; a sense of safety; as we neared the spot where the others were. 

The night was dark; no one noticed her pale face; the weaken state she was in. Another phase to the plan? Her eyes trailed over to the smirks of her friends; the explosions that they had in fact thrown in the direction of each guard growing on their tails. A small smirk tugged at her lips. Severs Ward right, to come for family; and you get burned. The others glanced at her; as the elephant in the room was exposed. She was shot; weak; blood pooling out of her as she spoke. “ I’m fine.” She said as she rested her head back down on his shoulder. She vaguely heard JJ make a plan. “ We run into town. There’s abandoned buildings, maybe we find a doctor office on our way.” It wasn’t settle or optimistic in any form; but maybe if we found supplies; I could stitch up my own wound. I had no desire to see a doctor again; nor could we trust any person wouldn’t go running to Ward. So I had barely said a word; leaving the decision up to John B; he was the fighter; the leader in this mess. I’d trust him; I’d follow him anywhere.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I nodded in response to JJ’s suggestion. No offense to my best friend, or anything, but when he came up with plans, they usually crashed and burned. Then again, his idea to break Sarah out wasn’t his worst plan. Mind you, she did get shot as a result of the escape, but I don’t know if I can necessarily blame JJ’s plan for that, or just pin the blame on Ward for being a deranged and psychotic piece of shit] I think heading toward the town is a good idea, but Sarah definitely needs a doctor. Kai, you still have the fake IDs we had made up for all of us, right? [Kai nodded in response while flashing me a confused look] Okay, so if we go to a doctor’s office or hospital, we can use the fake IDs, so Sarah’s identity doesn’t get back to her father. Either way, we need to get the bullet out of Sarah, and get her stitched up. That’s our first priority once we get off of this property. [I explained. Knowing Sarah was getting weaker from the blood loss, so the sooner we got her gunshot wound tended to, the more at ease I would feel that she’s going to be okay. Honestly, at this point in time, my only concern was Sarah. I kept that thought to myself though, because I knew if I startled to unravel with worry, everyone else would begin unraveling too. Bottom line, we weren’t going to make it out of this situation alive if we didn’t remain level headed and make the right decisions]

[ofnotakook]

Right decisions; was it ever in our nature? To be smart, to not lead on impulse? In the short time Sarah spend with John B and the pogues, she’s learned JJ and John B tended to make decisions on a whim. They tended to come up with a plan and without thinking ran with it. Granted it Sarah owed her life to the poges, she owed the idea that she was released from the bars of her own bedroom due to them. And she appreciated the fact given the limbo state the male and myself were tethered into that they risked it all for me. The wrath from my dad; the Camerons’s who I was learning spelled terrible news. Sarah always believed in her dad; the type of man he was. He was kind, he cared about his family wanted to provide for us. But the money the power it gave a person it tended to steamroll you into a horrible person. Sarah couldn’t believe her eyes; the lengths her dad was willing to go, harming his own daughter, embedding Rafe despite his own crimes. She felt disgusted with her own family. The blonde knew where she belonged; where her heart was. Holding onto dear life to the man she currently had her arms wrapped around. 

The blonde let nimble fingers graze over the thin layer of his shirt; the weak grip she held. Her wound was obvious, the blood pooling down her leg. Ward got her damn good. And Sarah hated her fate was on the edge of a line. Doctors wasn’t an option, she knew this island. She knew Ward was probably on a warpath now for blood. Pogues won by letting my escape happen, and now he’d be paying off any source he could, to get his hands on me. 

The female listened despite her own body was fading, head rested upon his head; the comfort of his scent, she was always safe with him. Eyes blinked open and closed, and she slowly let her weaken vision take in the pogue’s who glanced in every direction Smoke of the explosion was all in the air, intoxicating. “ Go South, we get on the boat, and port half way down the island, there’s a hidden office, our best bets is escaping this house.” A thought for food; a hidden doctors office; one that may get me home sailing. 

Without the risk of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised that, in spite of her condition, Sarah was the one to air out the best and most sensible plan. Giving a nod in response as I looked toward JJ and the others] You heard her. Head south. [I said in agreement as I continued carrying Sarah on my back as we all made route south toward the docks. Knowing our risk was still higher than not of getting caught, but she was right… If we had a chance of getting out of here and to freedom, this was the one with the best odds. More than anything though, I just wanted to get her somewhere safe, so she could get some medical attention. I could hear by how weak her voice was that she was losing a lot of blood. The longer this continues, the worse her chances of survival were. Once we reached the docks, we ducked into the shadows until reaching the boat. I made sure to get Sarah on safely, and then I laid her down across one of the seats to rest, while I helped JJ and Pope to untie the ropes; all the while Kai started up the boat. Knowing we’d all need to work together, and to do so quickly, or else we weren’t getting out of here alive] Okay, Kai, we’re clear. Get us the hell out of here. [I called out to her as me and the other guys pushed the boat away from the dock to give it an oomph and then once the boat was cleared from the sides, I returned to Sarah] How bad is it? [I asked as I grabbed the first aid kit stowed under the one seat. Not that I could do much with my incredibly limited experience and knowledge, but I felt helpless by not doing what I could for her now. Besides, if I could at least slow the bleeding, that would give her the best fighting chance to stay alive until we were able to get her medical attention]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt like she had lost everything. She used to be the girl who would always go to the beck and call of her dad; he used to be the incredible man she grew up with. He used to be the man who read bedtime stories to her. He used to give her a glass of milk each time. She had so many fond memories of him. But now; it felt like those memories were tainted. Sarah had always believed in him, she fought the urges to go against him. Seeing his boat explode it destroyed her; she broke up with John B the man she loved for him, because he was glad the man who took his father away got justice. Was dead. And suddenly it felt like our love wasn’t meant to be. 

And now Sarah was bleeding out because of the man who was supposed to protect her. He shot fire at her; at her friends not caring of the consequences. That was the sadness of the reality. That I was alone. I couldn’t turn to my sister, I couldn’t protect. I had to put myself first, and that was the pogues my made family. We lift each other up, we go to bat for each other. And I knew the high stakes. I knew what my father was capable of. I had to wonder how I had any ounce of love for him after what he’s done. Lying to protect Rafe, letting my brother get away with attempting to drown me, he let me get drugged. He’d rather put harm to me than take accountability. And I had to swallow that truth. With a heavy head I felt like my vision was becoming blur as I spurred the last task at hand. Hands loosen on the grip against John B’s shirt, as my eyes drifted shut. How long had we walked? Before I heard the rustling of feet hitting the docks. And I felt my body being dropped gently into the boat, back pressed against a hard backing on the edge. Slowly eyes lifted seeing blurs. 

Figures moving left and right; the “ Ropes done.” I heard from JJ as both boys plopped themselves down on the boat. Pope was at the wheel with Kie, I heard the soft whispers of nothingness. And I heard his voice, the one that always dragged me home. And I wanted to be honest, as my hand slowly nimbly moved against the dam fabric of my sweater as I lifted it up. And I saw it the blood, it was dark, and it explained why I felt faint. Turning my eyes to the man I loved; John B was preparing to bandage up the wound for a short time. “ It doesn’t look pretty, I’ll have a nasty scar if anything.” I aired out attempting to lighten the mood as I felt the boat move as if it was full of lighten. 

This remembered me of when I saved his ass, when we first started out; on our little adventure. A shy grin turned against my lips as I spoke. “ Last time one of us had to bandage the other up, I was sneaking you into the house, I saved your ass, are we finally repaying the favor?” I asked with a sense of teasing in my voice. Definitely not the time, but I needed a laugh a small brief moment for just us.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Although I knew now wasn’t the time for jokes and quips, I still appreciated the fact that Sarah was trying to keep the mood light between us. Maybe if the circumstances had been reversed, I would have been all for cracking jokes… Hell, I would more than likely be cracking them too. Given that Sarah had been shot and was rapidly losing blood though, I definitely wasn’t in a fun and games kind of mindset. For her sake though, I did flash her a grin as I leaned down to press a tender kiss to her forehead] Well, I figured I owed you so it was high time I stepped up and returned the favor. Maybe next time you want me to save you though, let’s go with something that involves less blood shed and need for panic… Deal? [Giving it my best effort to joke in return. In the meantime I grabbed the first aid kit. My hand shaking slightly as I quickly fished around for some bandaging and things I thought I could use to stop the bleeding] Either way, I’m putting you in charge of keeping an eye on me to make sure I’m doing this right. I mean, doctor stuff is new territory for me so I’ll need the supervision. All that to say, eyes open at all times, okay? [My casual way of requesting to Sarah that I wanted her to keep her eyes open. Afraid that if she closed them and fell asleep, I might lose her. A thought that I couldn’t bear to consider as I started to do what I could to apply pressure to her wound and then applied some gauze and then bandaging too, all in an effort to stop the significant bleeding she was currently experiencing]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was well aware of the bleeding that now wasn’t the time for her humor, for her need to crack a joke open. But Sarah could see how scared he was; it was in his eyes. She was scared herself that she was about to take her last breath, by the hands of her own father. Ward had no idea she was assuming that he had aimed for her; she had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. Her own father pulled the trigger; he was aiming a weapon at her friends, at the man she loved. And now she was facing deaths door; she remembered the last time. 

John B was the one aching in pain as she ran her fingers with a cold rag over his blooded wound; which is why the dirty blonde showed amusement. Or she was going nuts with the lack of blood in her system. Eyes had slowed movement as he spoke; and she knew this was his way of saying “ Stop Sarah.” As if she planned on taking a bullet tonight. But her smile soften knowing feeling the panic under his tone, and her slimmed hand; her hand reached to touch his arm as a soothing of reassurance that she was okay. “ I promise next time, I’ll tell my dad not to shoot.” She echoed with that sarcastic retort of hers. But Sarah was done with the jokes. Not that she had the energy. She felt like her body was giving out; she felt the color had now drained from her face in the dark. She barely felt the boat moving against the water; the ocean seas; the seas that used to bring soothing. That used to make her feel safe; and now she was trembling, she felt his hand on her wound; and she had glanced down the blood was soaking her skin, right through his hand. “ Use the guse to wipe around the wound, and then bandage it gently at least until we arrive.” To a doctor; assuming we had the money to get me treated; or this was the end. Her eyes landed back on his features, and she uttered an “ I love you.” As if it was the last words she’d say. 

Eyes kept fluttering open and shut in a daze, despite the promise to stay with him, to guide him through the process; she hardly felt her hand move down to her side; as if her limbs were jelly now. If only this boat would move any faster..

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I appreciated Sarah’s attempt to crack jokes now. That was kinda our thing, you could say, but at the moment, I felt far from laughing. I was worried and growing even more so with every passing second. Sarah was shot. She was bleeding out currently, and I had no way of knowing if we’d get her medical attention in time to save her] Speed up the boat! Let’s go! [I yelled out to Pope and Kie as I saw Sarah’s eyes close. Judging by the worried look on JJ’s face, I knew he was thinking the same thing I was] Hurry the hell up, JJ, and help me pack her wound. Quick, get those gauze pads from the bag! [My voice shaking in building worry as JJ did as I ordered; grabbing me what I needed as I tossed the now soiled and blood soaked gauze pads to the side as I took the clean ones from JJ’s grasp. My hand shaking as I pressed it against Sarah’s gunshot wound. After what felt like a damn eternity, the boat pulled to a stop. I didn’t exactly know where we were at the moment, but at this point Pope and Kie were tying off the boat to the pier, so it wouldn’t go anywhere, and then they rushed toward us] “Come on. I got word that there’s a surgeon in town who handles cases like this for the right price.” [Pope explained which prompted my brows to furrow in confusion] “Get Sarah, let’s go.” [Kie instructed, which prompted me to tape off the currently gauzed padding I had in place, then JJ helped me to lift Sarah carefully out of the boat and onto the pier. Once JJ and I were on the pier, I cradled Sarah securely in my arms] “Here, take this bag. It should be enough to get her treated. Pope and I will stay with the boat.” [Kie said as JJ grabbed the bag and the address of the warehouse doctor, and then we rushed through the dark night air toward the provided address. A less than ideal situation from all angles given Sarah’s condition and the fact that we were in an unfamiliar place looking for the location of a doctor that we knew nothing about. Talk about a wild card move, at its best] Stay with me, Sarah. We’re going to get you help. Keep fighting. [I called out to her as JJ barked out instructions and I merely kept up with his pace as I carried Sarah in my arms toward our destination]

[ofnotakook]

A scar that might kill me. 

It was a thought for Sarah; she felt like she’d been through the ringer. Her own family was willing to sacrifice her for their own benefits. Sarah once thought the world of her father; of the family. But now she knew the truth they only craved the wealth they’d stomp on anyone who dared to stand in their way. Sarah’s own brother tried to drown her, and now her father was the one who pulled the trigger. Obviously he was aiming for John B, but Sarah knew she’d always end up in the cross fire. 

Not that she cared, she’d rather die than live without him. The words she said that night; on the smaller boat, as John B fought for his life, to escape the death sentence. And I meant it; I loved John B and yeah we fought; we ended up screaming at each other. But i’d do anything to be with him, and now as I was fighting for my own life; I only hoped the pogues survived. Sarah was falling unconscious, she had felt her body shutting off. The last words she spoke were of love, an undenying world of love for him. But she felt the blood lost. She felt her wounds becoming fetel. And she heard the urgent, the eagerness in her man’s voice as she felt the vague packing of her wound. How long had it been? 

She had no idea, because she felt darkness overcome her. She felt like she was falling into limo. She barely felt John B and JJ as they wrapped her sim arms around their shoulders and held her up. Enough to look like Sarah was walking, but she was dragged towards the clinic, and she barely heard the exchange when the surgeon called the three up. And with each step, she felt a slight ache in her body. An ache she wanted to subside. But Sarach knew she had to fight; to live, to open her eyes again. She felt her frame fall to a bedding; as her head hung down as the surgeon whispered. “ It’ll be okay, fight.” And She fel the breathing tube come to her nose, she felt the bleeding that was exposed. The doctor mumbled a few words to her friends. “ Do you have the money? She may not live.” He uttered and I felt my body weak. My own shadow breathing as my eyes slowly woke, for a second to see the unfamiliar surroundings, the walls brown. The tubes connected to me, I was scared. But I couldn’t move before my eyes went shut all over again. 

The doctor took the money and he soon took a tool; to save me, if it did any good, because right now I felt like I was on the brink of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

“Yeah, man. Here.” [JJ aired out in response to the shifty doctor’s request for money, before handing him a bag with money in it. My eyes shifted into a roll watching the doctor count it. So much for a moral code to save a life. Apparently all this asshole cared about what money] Just save her. Please. [I aired out pleadingly as I held Sarah’s hand with my one hand; all the while gently stroking back the hair from her face with my free hand. After a moment or so the doctor seemed satisfied with the amount of money JJ gave him inside that bag, and then he began. Watching as he first put Sarah under with what I assumed to be some kind of anesthesia before he grabbed a questionable looking scalpel so he could begin making the first cut. I knew in my gut that trusting this doctor might be the worst idea we’ve ever had, but at the same point, our hands were tied. It was either this option or we’d lose Sarah. Sure, his “she may not live” statement didn’t leave me with much confidence in his skills, but I had to believe in Sarah now. Sarah was strong. She was brave. If anyone could fight this, it was her] Come on, baby. Fight this. Don’t you dare leave me. Fight, baby. Fight. [I gently pleaded in her ear before pressing a tender kiss to her forehead] “Keep watch.” [I heard the doctor instruct of JJ before giving me a knowing sort of look and then a nod] “Here we go.” [The doctor said in less than a confident tone as he made the first cut; taking the scalpel across Sarah’s skin in order to remove the bullet from her body. It was excruciating to watch, but I promised myself that no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her side] “Grab those gauze pads and some gloves. Pour some of that vial with sanitizing solution directly over the incision spot and then place the gauze pads firmly across the area to slow her bleeding. We don’t want her losing more blood than she already has.” [The doctor instructed; forcing me to release Sarah’s hand, so I could assist in the surgery. After what felt like an eternity, he finished; managing to remove the bullet and then to seemingly successfully repair damage to her wounded organ internally. Once he finished, he stitched her up then covered the wound with a significant amount of gauze pads and medical tape] “It’s a wait and see, at this point, so let’s hope she’s a fighter.” [The doctor said while washing his hands in the sink in the corner of the room] She is. [I flatly said in response before removing my gloves and washing my own hands once the doctor had finished. After ensuring my hands were clean, I returned to the table where Sarah rested and I took her hand in my own] You’re a fighter, Sarah. The strongest person I know, so fight this. I’m not going anywhere. [I had no way of knowing if she could hear me, but I didn’t care. On the off chance that she could, I was going to remind her of her strength and ability to fight this now]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt the screams into darkness. She felt like she was on a cloud in limo. She had no control of her body; she felt like she was paralyzed. She didn’t have the power to move, she barely felt her body being held up. She didn’t want to die, she didn’t want to be traped in her own bedroom. She never asked her own father to shoot bullets at her and her friends. Sarah suddenly felt like her once simply life was a cycle of nightmares. Death on our door steps, the rush of running; being on the med. Sarah knew her getting shot was her fault. If she had just listened to John B weeks ago; that Ward didn’t have my best interest at heart. 

If I had stayed with Pogues instead of trusting my now psychic family. One trying to kill me left and right. Sarah had learned her lesson, the only people she could count on was herself, the pogues, even her sister she just hoped her sister was okay. She knew she was stipid to be thinking about anyone but herself now. But she held sympathy for others. The aching in her body was enough to force her to scream in pain if she wasn’t knocked out. She vaguely heard the way her body gently was placed down on a mental table.  I vaguely felt John B his breath in my ear as he tried to reassure me I was okay, I was a fighter. I was in my own little bubble. The darkness in my lids, the way my body was lifeless, especially as the doctor did insert his tool into my body, if I was awake I’d be screaming. I barely felt it; probably from the anesthesia. I couldn’t move, I had no idea how long I was out. I could vaguely hear the voices as the doctor echoed out it would be touch and go. Would I be surviving? Was I still bleeding out? Sarah felt the stirs in her mind as she laid still. Baby, fight.. Words echoed in my ears. 

John B, he needed me, he needed me to be strong, to fight through the blood lost. I couldn’t let him down. I was groggy when I suddenly felt the strength to open my eyes. The small light above me it flashed my eyes forcing me to squit, and I felt John B’s head on my stomach, not on the wounded skin, but right under. I was aching as I let out a soft wine. My hand pale as I lowered my hand onto his dirty brown locks, fingers slowly combed through his hair. “ John B.” I echoed in a whisper; I couldn’t speak and I noticed JJ was sitting in the chair, eyes closed, even JJ stayed. A made family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Hours passed by and there was no change. Sarah was so still and I had no way of knowing if she’d ever wake up. The doctor didn’t sound hopeful. Made a snide remark about her chances of pulled through as he greedily took our money and then ran like hell like some kind of coward. Clearly it was all about money for him. As more time passed, I found my head resting against Sarah’s side. Near her incision but not close enough to cause any further damage. I just wanted and needed to be close to her now. JJ wasn’t far away. He took a look out to make sure Ward nor any of his men were nearby before he’d return to the private room here and take a seat in the chair adjacent from where Sarah and I rested now. I didn’t know how much more time had passed… Felt like an eternity even though I knew it was probably just a few more hours, but eventually I heard the faint sound of her voice, as well as felt her fingers rustle gingerly through my hair. At that my head immediately shot up and I looked at her. Relief flooding my face and expression currently] You’re awake! Thank God! [I uttered out in evident relief as I pressed a gentle kiss to the back of her hand] How are you feeling? The black market doctor left a few things for pain if you need it. [The guy wasn’t exactly reliable but he did seem to save Sarah’s life, so at the moment, I was thinking a bit more favorably of him. Maybe he wasn’t a total money-hungry quack after all. Jury was still out on that one though] Do you want some water? [I asked as I had already picked up a fresh bottle of water; prepared to give her some if she was thirsty]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt weak, she ha no idea as to how long she’d been laying her. The memory of her father; of how easily he had aimed a gun at her, at her friends because of what? Jealousy? Because he wanted to hold this wild control over her? Sarah had once desired to please her family. She had once idolize her father the memory of us at the docks when I was only a little girl it clouded who I knew he was. 

But a few hours before he was so willing to throw me under the bus. He was so willing to let me bleed out on our yard. Because of his hate for the Pogues. I was hurt, I was feeling betrayed but at the same time, relieved as I felt my body come to life. I felt my eyes lift open as I adjusted to the dim light. I saw JJ in the corner as my eyes peeled over to John B who had his head rested against my palm. And I knew I was lucky, he was here. He loved me, and I had to let my fingers run soothingly through his dirty blonde locks. A small smile peeled at my lips. And I knew I couldn’t move. I felt numb to my core as my body was now healing from the blood lost, Sarah wasn’t going to jump up, the fear of Ward on our tail was aching against my own skin. The blonde had peered up at him; the man she loved so much. 

“ I’m okay.” As okay as I was going to be. The wound had been deep, the stitched up wound was felt as my eyes slowly moved to the man I loved. My hand moved to reach for John B. And I felt a sigh of relief escape my own lips. And I felt my gaze linger on him. “ I’m sorry, I’m sorry my dad is a crazy,” My words could never compare to the pain my family has caused him, the pogues and I wanted to do my part to mend those fences. “ Yes.” I echoed to the option of water my throat felt dry but I wasn’t going to jump forward, I slowly lifted my head up to get to a sitting position. My free hand had moved to my side, knowing the pain; the wound my own family caused.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I felt mounds of relief when I heard Sarah’s voice. She was alive. She was awake, and she was speaking. Lifting her hand to my lips as I pressed a couple of kisses to the back of her hand, then gently lowered her hand back down onto the metal table she was lying on] Hey, don’t apologize. It’s not your fault. All that matters is keeping you safe and away from your deranged family. [No matter what, I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t let Ward harm Sarah again. I thought to myself as I brought a fresh bottle of water to Sarah’s lips, so she could drink as much as she wanted and needed. I knew she needed time to rest and heal, but the sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better I could guarantee her safety from her family. One could hope, at least. I mean the way Ward operated, and the fact that he knew people all over the world, I wasn’t sure exactly how far remote we would need to go, and for how long either for that matter, in order to keep Sarah safe, but no matter what, I’d do what it takes. I came close to losing Sarah this time… Too close for comfort, so I wasn’t willing to take any chances with her safety again. At least not until Ward was no longer a threat to her] Once you’re well enough, we’re going to get you out of here. Pope and Kie are keeping an eye on the boat, and when you’re strong enough, we’re all getting on that boat, and getting as far away as possible. We figure with some distance and preferably some place off the grid, eventually your father will stop looking for you. [Maybe wishful thinking since Ward wasn’t one who took well to losing, but one could hope he’d eventually give up and accept that Sarah was gone]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah kept asking herself the obvious how she’d been blind. How she was capable of still holding a torch of love for her family. With all the crimes all the ways her own brother tried to murder her; sending drug mules her way, being the one that nearly drowned her to death. And now her own father; was so mad at the Pogues so terrified of losing his daughter to the pogues; not wanting to lose the fight that he aimed and shot me. The blood that once covered her fingertips, the blood the redness that ran over her sweater, it was an image Sarah couldn’t erase.  

Her friends, her boyfriend? Cut into the crossfires because of her fucked up  family. And even now as she opened her eyes; said a few words, she felt the aching on her wound, damn that stitch is gonna hurt like hell. But it was comforting to feel his touch, to witness his lips touching her knuckles once again. John B, he was her anchor that kept her whole. A soften expression; a smile curled at the corners of her lips as she saviored his touch; his lips against her skin. “  They drugged me, they forced me here. I feel trapped like no one is safe in that house, but my sister..”  A fear for the little Cameron it rocked me whole now, as I felt the lump forming in my throat. Wheezie she was innocent had no idea who’s roof she was living under. Like myself; I’d been blinded from the truth. But now my father was deranged; he passed off onto Rafe; and Rose was clueless as ever a pond in the game; until she crossed Ward. 

A slight cough was heard; as the blonde felt the wetness hit her tongue, one sip of water turned into half the bottle until she released the top from her lips and she slowly sat herself up, her palms hitting the metal of the table to hold herself up. Nuts insane considering her own wounds she wore. But her eyes ran along John B’s features with ease. “ You know he won’t let that happen. He blames you the pogues for his princess no longer being in his care. I’m a game for him to win..” A sad truth, an ached formed in her chest now.  “ I wouldn’t blame you if you allowed the pogues to leave me here for  dust to get away. I don’t want to bring you down, or put you and pogues in danger..” Not again the words hid  at the tips of her tongue. 

Danger; our names, but Ward he’d kill to end the war..I was terrified the lengths he’d go no matter how safe I felt with John B; he’d get hurt because of me. A pill I needed to swallow now.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, that would never happen. [I flatly replied with a matter of fact sort of shrug. Sure, I knew if this was just about Sarah, maybe JJ and the others would have high-tailed it out of here. Not necessarily Pope since he had a heart to do the right thing, but Kie was what you could say, hot and cold toward Sarah, so it wouldn’t take much for her to bail on Sarah. And well, JJ hated Kooks in general, so he had no loyalties to Sarah either. Thing was though, they all knew I’d literally die to protect Sarah, and the Pogues would always put their lives on the line to protect each other. All that to say, as long as I was staying put at Sarah’s side, the Pogues wouldn’t be going anywhere either because they’d always have my back, just like I’d always have theirs too. We fought fiercely for each other] Even if the others decided to high-tail it out of here, I’d never leave your side. Unless you tell me to go, I’m not going anywhere… [I started to say before an amused smirk followed] And even then, I can’t promise I’d actually leave. You know I’m stubborn when people try to tell me what to do. [I teased even though that was the truth] Either way, once you’re well enough, we’re all getting the hell out of here, and getting to safety together. Until then, just rest and heal. [I said as I gave her hand another gentle squeeze. My way of reassuring her that we were all in this together; no matter what the outcome]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah knew her choices  as of late not only disappointed herself but those around her. Sarah never wanted the wealth, she never wanted to be accepted as the princess Kook. That title had been given to her. People made assumptions about her; her personality; how she followed the kook business, and yes once upon a time she was a kook. Bu from that one day running around with John B at chapel Hill, helping him seek answers to a quest she had no idea how over our heads we were. We were just kids running around aimlessly. But I saw that treasure hunting look in his eyes; the way his eyes lit up at a map, and I mused, I admired who John B. And he made me want more for myself. 

One day; one rain kiss on the docks was all it took for the dirty blonde to feel hooked. He’s who she loved, and even with death upon us; my dad probably having a search squad on our heads. I had let the pogues down; when I had let John B go, I was angry, I was sad when I thought my dad died, and john B was just so glad to see him fall through the cracks. My dad was money hungry, he was awful he killed, he allowed Rafe to get away with Murder, but he was my dad; but now as I groggily came out of my unconscious state; I remembered the cage I felt locked in. I recalled his aim, the gun shot wound that should’ve killed me. My own father aimed the trigger, and right now Sarah knew in her gut she was a pogue, and she appreciated the friendships she made. Eyes glanced over for comfort to the boy that made her heart race. And her pinky found his; a trace of her finger against his own. 

“ I made that mistake once, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for letting you go John B, I was..” Pausing briefly before a sigh could be heard escaping her lips. “ I was hurting, I didn’t want to believe my dad was this monster. I know you said you’ve always got me, but I wouldn’t blame you if you decided no one chances.” Chances to love me, to be together after this horror war my dad had, all the times guns aimed at us because of him, a war he wanted to win on behalf of me. One he already lost. 

Because my heart; who I was, it was a pogue; my known family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I get it, Sarah. Before I came into your life and opened your eyes to who your dad and brother really are, you had a really tight bond with your dad. Naturally you’d want to fight to protect his reputation. It only makes sense that you wouldn’t want to believe your dad was capable of something like that. If the situation was reversed, and it was me in your shoes, I probably would have done the same thing as you. [I admitted honestly. It was the truth. If this was my dad, I would have fought to protect his reputation too. It’s what you do for the people you love. I’d do it for Sarah and the pogues too because I consider them my family. No matter what, I’d always have their backs, just like I know the pogues would have mine] You’ll never run out of chances with me, Sarah. I hate to break it to you, but I love you, so until you say otherwise, you’re stuck with me. [As much truth as there was in my words, I aired out that honesty with a joking tone] Anyway, for now, we just need to get your strong enough that we can move somewhere safer for the duration of your recovery. [I knew where we were would suffice for now, but it would only be a matter of time before Sarah’s dad figures out we’re hiding out here currently. We’d cross that bridge if and when the time comes. For now I wanted Sarah to get a little stronger and heal up a bit before we decide to move her]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah had always been privileged growing up. She knew of the different layers of the island. She never wanted to believe in herself to judge others; the living, how some had to work harder than others. But Sarah was guilty to pulling away when it felt messy and difficult. When someone got too close to her; she was the one guilty of running. The fear of being seen truly. It’s what happened with her friendship with Kie, and it was easy to blame the split on how John B reacted to her father’s then death. But the truth was Sarah was scared. 

Scared of letting go of the shielded life she lived, the ground beneath her gone. Her family shattered into pieces. Her dad wasn’t the man she once admired. He was a monster; he felt threatened he knew I wasn’t under the spell, and he tried to hurt me. My own brother tried to kill me, did I feel safe with my family? No I was shot because of my dad, and now I felt the numbness against my skin. The numbness that tingled the layer of my stomach; where the scars stood. I wouldn’t blame John B if he wanted to cut loses here, and leave me stranded. But I knew him his heart; the good boy inside of him; the boy I loved with every fiber inside of me. “ It’s not about him anymore. I knew who he was; he wasn’t the dad I once laughed with on the beach when I was a little girl, he knew he lied, he knew what he did, and my brother is protecting him. I’m sorry for the pain my family caused you.” The pogues hanging onto my lips. 

Hearing the words; unlimited chances hung in the air. I love you; and I loved him, I wouldn’t let the male get away from me again. Sarah tried her best to master the pain, the smile heated against brims as her hand grasped hold of his fingers. “ I love you.” words spoken as the blonde attempted to sit up using the strength of her elbows to hold her upper frame upright. But she knew staying put wasn’t an option; Ward had his minions surroundings areas; I would gasp through the pain than get caught. An intense stare hinted into my features as I spoke. “ John B.. we have to move. I can handle the pain. This island isn’t safe not with my dad, he has people..” And I knew Ward; he wanted power; to hold an angle, and us staying still didn’t feel safe; for me or the pogues.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I knew Sara was right… We had to move sooner rather than later. We were basically sitting ducks here. Ward had this whole island in his pocket, so it would only be a matter of time before he got wind of the fact that we were here. I’ll be damned if I did all this work to break Sara out of there… And then to get her the help she needed after she got shot, just for that deranged idiot to take her back to the prison he had her encamped in] Okay, if you’re sure you can handle it, we’ll move. [Worried if she busts a stitch she may bleed out though] We need to take it slow though. Be smart about this. We can’t afford you busting any stitches. If you bleed out… [I trailed off. Not even able to finish off the thought of that possibility] Let me tell JJ we’re going to move. [I said as I pressed a kiss to Sara’s forehead; letting my lips linger there for a second or two before I broke away. It was almost like I didn’t want to let her out of my sight; fearful I’d lose her] Be right back. [I promised as I briefly and reluctantly left the table she was resting on in order to find JJ, who was keeping watch just outside] We’re moving. We need to get off of this island. Alert the others. [JJ agreed; immediately pulling out his phone to message the others to get the boat ready for our momentary departure. In seeing JJ got the ball rolling on that, I returned to Sara. Preparing to move her once she gave me the okay. I still felt unsettled about us leaving, but at least night had set in, so that would give us the advantage as we used the darkness, shadows, and any alleyways we could find to our advantage] Just tell me when, and I’ll help you off the table.

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was embarrassed of who her family was now. It used to be a loving home, used to be a place of safety. The countless family dinners outside on the docks by the grills. The countless boat rides we had. The loving embraces from her dad; he used to be a home for her. And now when she thought about Ward all she felt was anger, betrayal. Someone who only cared about greed, he went out of his way to coverup a death, to frame John B, and now he even if it was an accident he shot me. I was stitched up because of him. All that to say; I didn’t want to be stuck on this island for one more minute. I was on edge, my hand touching the bandaged wound, as I felt the pain. We’re sitting ducks; Ward had his minions all over the island; it was possible he’d be hunting me down. This was a lowkey office; and I doubted this bystander of a doctor was on the payroll. 

I was aching, I didn’t want the drugs, but I also had to put the pogues first; John B first. They came to Nassau for her, Sarah didn’t care if she was limbing in pain whimpering as she sped up to walk as long as we ended up on that boat and made our way back to OBX a home, a new safety. We’d find a way to the gold; our rightful place of earnings. Sarah could see the concern written on John B’s face now, but she was okay. A smile of reassurance coming from her now. She laid kept on the metal table now, as she nodded, biting down on her lower lip to hold out on any pain. “ I promise, slow and steady wins the race.” I added with a joke, Sarah found her more humours side with him. The touch of his lips on her forehead, it made her insides turn, the butterflies now. Sarah had waited until John B had stepped outside to inform JJ before she was able to slowly sit back up. Damn the shooting pain that ran up her side. Deep breaths, Sarah was about to move to step down from the table when she heard her boyfriend, A soft brave smile came to her lips. Reaching out her hand to grasp hold of his arm for support. “ We need to move. I’m ready.” Her stitching may not be; but I could rest once we got safety; but until the docks came into view the dirty blonde wouldn’t feel at ease. 

An unsettling feeling at the pit of her stomach.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised the second I offered my help to Sarah once she was ready, she didn’t hesitate to take my hand. Anybody else would be feeling sorry for themselves and their situation, but not Sarah. She was a total bad ass. By far, the bravest person I knew. Thing was though, I hated moving her. She nearly bled out and died after being shot. Her stitches were the only thing keeping her from doing so now, so what she needed more than anything was to rest and heal. Problem was, her deranged father and his entourage of employees that would be on the look out for us. I didn’t like having to move her from here, but it was either this, or get caught by her father’s people. Neither outcome was ideal, which was why I left the final choice up to Sarah. Her answer clear as day when she held out her hand and took a hold of my arm for support] I can carry you. I’ll do the whole slow and steady thing… Taking your word on the winning the race part you joked about. [Flashing her an amused grin. Knowing now wasn’t the time for fun and jokes, but maybe we both needed a little light humor given the shitty circumstances we were facing. I silently told myself as I helped her off the metal table she was lying across and then kept a secure hold on her until she was steady on her feet] You good? [Needing to know she was okay before I made any further movements or plans]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah should’ve been more hesitant to move. Given the amount of stitches her body had to have, the amount of blood she had lost from that gunshot. The one that came from her father. Sarah if she had too much time to dwell on it would start feeling useless a burden to her own family. Because one her dad was willing to lie for Rafe, yet the innocent child like myself was left to scrape by. Pick a side, and my heart was with the pogues, with John B. And my brother was a bit deranged now, but I suppose father like son, Rafe had to get that attitude from somewhere didn’t he? 

I fought the urge to roll my eyes now. As I found that strength to lift my body up to sit and reach my feet the white tennis shoes to the ground. And I did and felt that aching pain on my lower abdomen. Where the stitches were, and as John B came to view I wore a gentle smile as I reached to brace myself for the pain as I put the weight on my feet. Fingers wrapping around his forearm you felt his muscles now as I found my courage to fully stand. “ I don’t want to make it harder for you to run, I’ll try to keep up.” A promise to my heart, but if John B and the others got hung up because of me I’d never forgive myself. The pogues were in a tough spot because of me. And I hated it, I’d rather bleed out on that table than for them to get caught. All that to say, my hand slid into his bigger palm with a squeeze. “ I’m ready, let’s meet the others.” Conviction in my tone as with an easy step started towards the exit doors; to leave, before my dad found us, before we felt in hot waters.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, I don’t want to run the risk of you popping one of your stitches and bleeding out, so we’ll take it slow and steady. Hell, if we have to crawl there to keep your safe, then so be it. [Mind you I didn’t expect either of us to crawl, obviously, but I was just trying to prove a point now. No matter what risk came to me, Sarah’s safety and well-being would always be my top focus. I silently thought to myself as I gave her hand a gentle squeeze] I’m good carrying you if that will be easier and less painful than you having to walk. [Fortunately the pier wasn’t far from here, but the problem was, we couldn’t exactly walk right down main street to get there since Sarah’s father, no doubt, had people out there looking for us. Nah, we needed to take the most discreet way possible in order to keep ourselves from getting noticed before we reach the boat that would hopefully get us the hell out of there] JJ’s right outside waiting for us… He’s already figured out a plan with the best route we should take to get to the pier where the boat’s waiting for us. [I explained as I securely and protectively held her close to me as she got on her feet; giving her a nod in reply as she gave the “okay” that she was ready] Walking or do you want me to carry you? [Knowing Sarah had an independent side to her so I figured I’d leave the decision up to her]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was fierce and strong. She felt the harbor of why us Pogues were on the run now. It was due to my father. Who had once been the apple of my eye, once been a dependable man. Once been someone I counted on, but he was the one who shot that aim. And landed me fighting for my life. Sarah was scared not that she’d say the words. She was scared of popping her own stitches now. Scared of taking a last breath. And John B he was by my side; he was a good person, even if I got angry with him from time to time. 

“ I’m okay.” An insistent of words. I’m fine. I definitely felt the wound, I felt that skin split when I stood up onto my feet. But i figured if i said the words long enough they’d be true. Sarah was a fighter; she tended to jump into the line of fire without care. And in this case; the pier wasn’t far, her idea of the island she knew it from the back of her head now. And Sarah wanted to be a leader; she wanted to feel empowered to get us pogues out of this mess. And as she stood to her feet; she nodded with a smile, genuine and sweet for him, as her hand laced through his own. “ Okay, but are we sure JJ’s plan is the best? He tends to have outcomes that come knocking on his door..” A grossome expression on her features now, as her hand made its way to his arm, as she prepared to jump on his back. “ I would love to walk John B, but my stitches, my pain level is a 10 right now, so carrying me is best..” Assuming the offer stood. I knew John B he wanted me to be comfortable. 

I was independent by nature, I had my own strength but even I felt that lower pain each time I moved, pick battles and right now I just wanted to be off my feet, and in his arms. A smile a batting of eyes now as I slowly hopped on his back legs wrapped around his waist to prepare for our trip, to the docks, to our ride home.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Eh… [I shrugged slightly in response to her question about JJ’s plan. It was a fair question. JJ was one of my best and most trusted friends, so I’d have his back no matter what, but with that aside, even I couldn’t deny that his track record with his plans working out wasn’t the best. In fact, they failed more often than not. This time around, it seemed like our only option, so even if the odds weren’t necessarily in our favor, we had to give it our best shot] It’s not a great plan, but unfortunately our only option currently. [I confessed. Knowing I couldn’t ever lie to Sarah] In his defense, this seems to be one of his better and more thought out plans, so fingers crossed. [No, that answer wasn’t ideal, or even all that convincing, but again, I couldn’t lie to Sarah. That’s how I felt, so it was a run like hell and hope for the best type of plan right now] Okay, I’ve got you. No matter what. [I assured Sarah as I carefully lifted her up from the floor and into my more than capable arms; cradling her protectively close to me as we cautiously exited the warehouse, met up with JJ who was keeping watch for us right around the corner, and then we started toward the dark alleyways and vacant roadways in an effort to go as unnoticed as possible as we raced like hell toward the boat where the rest of our friend group was waiting]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah had leaped into the pogue life. She had leaped into the trust for John B. She was back to stepping outside of the bubble wrap. It was rushed up adrenaline, it was the adventure, but in this point in time Sarah was scared. Her father had shot at her; the man she once thought stood on a pedestal was the man responsible for her injury. The blood stain through her sweater, the man who put gates over her windows to prevent her from leaving. He grew up on the cut, he transformed his life; he had wealth now. I once admired him, but now when I thought of his face I felt this twirling in my stomach as if my stomach was dropping. 

I was achy, my lower abdomen was in pain, the drugs, the stitching was only going to hold for so long. I knew JJ his lack of track record had spoken for themselves, and I saw that not so trusting expression cross the male’s face even for a split second. But as we established out time was limited before the streets would be swarming with guards, with police, as my father as the huntsmen. I had to swallow any doubt I had, and believe in the only option us pogues had. With a short less than confident bob of my head, the blonde had slipped her arms around John B’s neck, leaning her head on his shoulder, the comfort of his hold. And She wrapped her slander legs around his waist once her grip was in solid ground, she braced herself for the race against time. 

Alleyways with the boys, the short cuts and I had pointed ahead to the marina, where I knew our little boat would be waiting. “ Just straight ahead.” I whispered as if I once grew up here; on this soil summer nights at the beach, late nights on the boats enjoying the sun going down, watchful moons. And now we’re running away; to where? Outer Banks which was once paradise on earth. Hearing from the distant alarms rang off in my head. 

Cops? Worrisome laid out on my face. Let’s hope the others had the rope in hand and ready to back into the ocean the second we landed on the boat.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

No matter what, we’ll figure it out. That’s one thing about the Pogues… Are track record and planning aren’t always great, but we always find a way to get our asses out of trouble. [I joked. Not that this was a time for jokes or quips but I figured Sarah wouldn’t mind the a slight break from the stress and obvious worry she was feeling currently] Besides, when plan A doesn’t work, we’ve got like twenty-five other letters to work through. [I said optimistically while a smirk creased my lips. JJ leading the way; pausing briefly to as we came to openers to make sure nobody was around to catch up before he’d signal with his hand for us to continue] We’re close… [I murmured more so to myself in relief as I saw the waterway approaching. I was eerily confident that if we could make it to the boat without getting caught, that’d we’d be home-free to get the hell away from this island. Sure, I knew it wouldn’t be as easy as I was optimistically trying to write it off as, but I wasn’t anything if not hopeful. Besides, I couldn’t let anything happen to Sarah, so I’d do whatever I needed to in order to get her out of here safely]

[ofnotakook]

Which was true. All joking aside, the pogues had a way of wording or acting themselves out of trouble. The amount of times they’ve nearly gotten themselves thrown in jail and survived. Sarah wasn’t worried about the backup plans, nor was she concerned about putting her trust out in John B. Because she’d trust him with her life. 

It was the sirens, it was alerts that kept cycling through her head. Her fingers held tightly onto John B she swore he felt her grip through his shirt. All that to say, Sarah was nervous. She also knows the island, and her father. He didn’t do well with losing, and when he didn’t have the princess Kook on his side; it was safe to say the man got nervous. And the dirty blonde wasn’t a trophy to be tossed around. Sarah was smart, had her own mind. And this game, this idea that he could steal from the pogues, fake his death it rubbed her wrongly. “ I trust you.” Was all the female was able to muster. Before the crashing of waves were heard, the docks in the clear. I spotted our little boat, the pogues, as Kie waved us over. Leaning my head closer into his neck, I pressed a small kiss to his neck as I leaned my face into him, a smile blossoming on my lips. 

Home free, and as our shoes hit the dock, inches away from the rope of our friends, I spotted the police car, a horn sounded to stop. “ Go.” I said as I aired out with urgency, because it was run or flight, and there’s no way my injury was for nothing. 

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I couldn’t help but to smile when I heard Sarah confess that she trusts me. It boded well for me that she did because let’s be honest, our plans were far from successful the majority of the time. Let’s hoped this latest plan wouldn’t be one of those failed missions. Either way, though, I wasn’t going down without a fight. Especially knowing I held Sarah’s life in my hands right now, too] I got you. [I replied reassuringly as I heard her urgency for us to go. At that, I didn’t hesitate to pick up my pace toward the boat where Kie was waving us down. JJ got into the boat first, then offered his help as I carried Sarah and I into the boat. Fortunately for us, Pope had already started up the boat] Everyone lay low… Let’s get out of here without anyone seeing our faces. [I instructed. It was a fifty-fifty shot that someone would recognize Pope, Kie, or JJ, but Sarah and I definitely needed to keep ourselves low and out of notice at all costs. We were close now… About to put some necessary space between us and Sarah’s father, so we couldn’t blow it now. I thought to myself as I grabbed some towels I found on the floor of the boat and covered Sarah and I with them as Pope put the boat into gear and worked to get us out of this harbor as quickly yet subtly as possible. The key now was to avoid bringing any unnecessary attention to us so we had to remain low and act as naturally as we could]

[ofnotakook]

Our relationship may had felt on the edge of late, the split heavily on our minds, a lack of empathy, a lack of care to others feelings. But when push came to shover John B was a protector, he was someone I trusted to keep me safe, that I was in safe hands if I wasn’t able to take care of myself. Her father used to be an important person to her; but every time we spoke now it was like talking to a wall. He only cared about the gold the money he stole from the pogues. Sarah didn’t believe a word Ward said, plus he locked her up like she was a prisoner instead of his own daughter. Not to mention her little sidekick the bandage on her lower hip was a gift from dear old dad. 

Her family wasn’t hers anymore, it was unhinged, unsteady. She was nearly killed by two members of her own family, blood shed it stayed with her, as fear now built inside of her. Sarah wanted safety, and as she heard the reassurance in the male’s voice her arms securely tighten around his neck as he ran like hell to get to the boat. The roared engine of the boat was faith, With her body slowly hitting the deck of the boat, she quickly laid herself down against the floorboards, towels came down on top of John B and herself; eyes pried on us. Yet our friends no attention was drawn upon them. Sirens getting closer as she felt the boat movement, her hand instinctively had reached for John B under the towels, as a deep breathing of exhale came and went. 

Pope behind the wheel as the boat moved from the dock, JJ being JJ you could hear his own amusement as he aired out “ Have a great day.” To the officers I assumed and you could hear Kie swat his arm of disappointing nature. A roll of my eyes under the towels now, as we waited for the call; the indication we were safe. Our boat swayed against the ocean blues, swiftly. All we needed was a sign; ensure the threat was in our rearview mirror.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I flashed JJ an amused smirk and a head shake when I heard his cocky remark to the officers while you could practically hear Pope’s heart pounding rapidly as he pushed firmer on the throttle to get more distance between the boat and the marina. None of that mattered now though. Sarah was safe… At least for now, and I fully intended to keep it that way. Now it was only a matter of reaching a place where we could get Sarah the medical attention she likely needed, but her father and deranged family wouldn’t find out about it. More than anything, I just wanted Sarah and the others safe. Her father knew a lot of people though, so it was going to be a challenge, to say the least. Given all the challenges and hell the pogues have been through over the years, I was confident we had this one too. Let’s hope my confidence would pay off this time around]

[ofnotakook]

The rapid sounds of her beating heart. The worry, the fear that we’d be discovered. The towels were enough to cover when our bodies felt stiff, down low, the hardness of the boards of the flooring of the boat hitting my back. My body was aching, we just ran like hell, Well more like John B did, the champ he was. Sarah felt guilty for the position john B, the man she loved was in, and the pogues her found family. 

Ward, he played the act well. He played the act of a loving father who would bring no harm, and as a little girl I laughed with hm, I hugged him and felt safe. And now as I felt that obvious weakness in my lower abdomen, I felt like I had no idea who he was, the lengths he was willing to go to win. I had vaguely listened on to JJ and his smart remarks, not to mention Pope who obviously was exhaling deeply. Once I had felt the tug at the bottom of layers of towels, Kie had whispered “ Your good, we’re far enough.” And I didn’t know i was holding my breath, that I was a near wreck of fear until the confided space, until the material was lifted off my face and I exhaled. I looked up at the blue skies, and I turned to John B, my hand had reached over to brush against his. “ Thank you, all of you. “ And I knew I had come up short here and there the conflict between the pogues and my family; but I was confident i’d be welcomed back with open arms. 

Slowly sitting up, I had held the bandaged wound as I exhaled to avoid a whine on my lips. “ I’m sorry my dad my family are assholes, but I am on your side, and i’ll do whatever we have to do to get that upper hand again.” As to where this landed us, not a clue. Because the cross was gone, the gold gone, us on a boat my family’s boat might I add, sailing the ocean, and no idea where we go next. A forced smile on bare lips. What else could go wrong?

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Once Kie called that the coast was clear, we peeled the toweled off of us. My eyes immediately drifted to Sarah in concern. Aside from her rapidly beating heartbeat, which at the moment, I could also relate to, she seemed to be okay... Well, "okay" being a vague definition currently since she was just shot a short while ago] Hey, you're more Pogue than you are Kook, and us Pogues take care of each other. [I reminded her. I knew JJ always bounced back and forth with this one. One minute he was consider Sarah one of us and seemed accepting, and in the next he was reminding me who her family is and I'd be smart to cut her loose. Knowing JJ, he'd weigh in at some point on how he felt about all of this. Sure, I'm guessing he enjoyed the rush of breaking her out, getting shot at, and then running for our lives, but he'd also probably harbor some bitterness since he'd blame Sarah for us having to do that in the first place. No matter where he stood, Sarah was in my life, and as long as she had me, I'd be in hers too, so like it or not, JJ would have to come to terms with that] "We can't pick our families. Trust me, if we could, I'd choose literally anyone but my own father to be my father." [JJ said in response and I nodded agreeably. The point being, it wasn't Sarah's fault. She couldn't help that her family was deranged] You're safe now. We all are. That's what matters. [Were we though? Would we ever be fully safe knowing Ward was still out there? The man didn't like to lose, and we just took his daughter from him, so I had a sinking feeling it would only be a matter of time before he struck again]

[ofnotakook]

I can always trust in you

@apogueforlife 

I can always trust in you 

Trust; it had to be earned. Love; it had to be developed. For Sarah she always had her guard up. Each time she’d get close to letting someone in the other shoe would drop, she’d freeze up, and run in the other direction. With each boyfriend she ever had she had the urge to run. To distant herself when she felt like she was trapped. When she felt the pressure to feel more than what she did. Topper he liked the idea of her. He loved the idea of being with her; but he wasn’t in love with her. 

There’s only one boy Sarah loved; and that was John B. It happened unexpectedly. It happened on a day she never saw coming. That day stayed with her. The day we went to chapel hill; the day we had fun dressing each other up. The day we pretended to be our alter egos; Val and Vlad. It was nice to be herself. I didn’t feel the pressure to be perfect. I didn’t feel like my family was watching me, I was myself. I felt safe, I felt like John B saw me despite all the flaws I had. He loved me for me, and I loved him. It was a roller coaster of a relationship if you asked me. We had gone from barely knowing each other; to falling completely utterly in love. I gave up my kook card for him. I knew the obsluces we’d be facing now, the pogue’s vs the kook. But nothing made me question my loyalty to him. To the Pogues. It got messy with my dad; him being the reason Big John was gone. The reason why the gold was taken. The reason I was on the run with John B. The gold felt so close yet so far. We managed to clear John B’s name but that’s because Ward decided in his best interest to fake his own death and act like the hero. The guy that claimed to have been a killer in order to protect his own son. Rafe just the thought of being near him made me sick to my stomach. For a second I was upset, I felt like my whole body ached when I witnessed the boat blow up. When I witnessed my father shatter beyond the sea. And that’s when I saw the truth; what led to us being torn apart; what led to John B and I no longer being together. He had been happy to ward dead; and I couldn’t exactly find the words to blame him. He took everything from him. But at the end of the day; he was my dad. I was hurting and I remembered that look all too well; the look of proudnessI felt like I was seeing another person. I was grieving the dad I once looked up to, to the dad that I was once his princess. I needed John B to hold me, to make me feel like it was always going to be okay. But it suddenly felt like us it wasn’t meant to be.. 

Walking away for yourself; was all you could do. It was hard to be near him; to be pulled back into the adventure; to the cross. But for Pope I’d be there; awkwardness assured. Sarah didn’t know if she should make eye contact with him; or just stay silent. Silence seemed better; until that night; we had a plan to get the cross from Rafe; the big truck was parked outside my house. JJ and Pope were hidden behind the bushes. I was determined to walk inside; to get the key to unlock the truck; how we’d get the heavy cross out was a big ass story of it’s own. But I had made two steps to the gates, one glance backwards; I saw him John B was about to get up; and for a second I found myself hopeful; maybe this was the moment of the unknown. What comes next? Dark hues met for a second and I swore the air was taken out of my lungs; but he didn’t budge, didn’t move. Giving me the indication we had nothing left to say. That was the last memory I had of him; of us staring at each other. 

Head leaned against the gated up windows of my room at the barbados house, The house I was locked into. The boat felt like a nightmare; I was drugged by my own family. Rose had put a drug in my tea. Rafe and had helped her execute the plan; to force me here against my will. I remembered telling Ward when he claimed John B only cared about the treasure about the gold that I was just stuck in the cross hair that he was wrong. That John b would find him and come for him once I went missing. How wrong had I been? I wanted to blink back the tears that dared to fall. I was a pogue at heart; I chose it for John B because I loved him, despite our differences he’d always have a permanent place in my heart. It had been weeks since we left on the boat, I had tried to zone out the conversations of my parents; I had pretended to be sleeping at times, but here once I had been pulled into my room I never left. I guess Ward was afraid I’d run, or threaten to tell the cops his own daughter was kidnapped against her will. Give or take. Sarah swallowed the lump in her throat; it had gotten dark. She smelt the tray of food that her sister left her outside the door. Her bed was an inch away; The light pink covers still in place, it had been a day or two since we arrived, and I had slept in my bed because that meant i was okay, that meant that I was adjusting to being here; in this house. When all I wanted was to break free. At the window, on the seat where my back was pressed against the wall. Head tilted towards the window, I could see the water; any boats that passed by. I was alone; and all I could hope was that the Pogue’s were okay that perhaps my dad was right they managed to get the cross and that’s all that mattered for Pope. Eyes moved to the stars; for a moment it was nice to believe we were looking at the same stars; as if John B was on his way; assuming my dad was lying. For now all I could do was hold hope; I’d find a way out; it was a done deal. 

Tomorrow; I’d work out a plan. The Pogues would have me, if I found him. We’d always have each other. A wistful thought as a hint of a smile tainted onto my lips.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Love. Definitely not something I ever believe really existed. I always saw it more as, in life, people come and go. The ones who matter will stick with you, through thick and thin. For me, that was the Pogues: JJ, Kie, and Pope. I don’t remember a time in my life when those three weren’t part of it, and something tells me, I’ll never shake them either. Not that I’d want to, cause they’re everything to me. Then Sarah Cameron busted into my life unexpectedly… One of those surprising moments where I got myself in a sticky situation, and Sarah Cameron, of all people, was the one who bailed me out of it. Even more surprising though was how I felt when I was with her. It was the first time in my life when I found myself wanting to be with a girl exclusively. In time she even made me rethink my original theory about love. Then, well, I guess you could say life happened, and we broke up. Sure, I knew I played a part in our break up. When her father died, I should have been more supportive of the toll that loss would take on Sarah. Yeah, the guy was bad news… A lying crook, which Sarah obviously knew too, but he was still her father. Given the bad blood I had with Ward, and also the fact that he murdered my father, could you really blame me for being relieved that the guy was finally gone? Right or wrong, it’s how I felt. This leading to the end of Sarah’s and my relationship. Still, in my heart I knew this wasn’t the end for us. A love like ours always finds a way back to one another. Naïve or not, I refused to see it any other way…

Then weeks passed and I was starting to wonder if it really had been the end for us. Mind you, I still wasn’t giving up, but instead of dwelling on what may or may not happen between me and Sarah, instead the Pogues and I focused on getting the cross back for Pope. It actually became a, “Kill two birds with one stone” type of adventure for us though, since word got to me that Sarah had been abducted by her family. Them ultimately boarding a ship with Sarah and the cross, allegedly heading to Barbados; knowing that was exactly where we would be going to. This was it… This was our chance to, not only help Pope get the cross back, but also for me to rescue Sarah too…

Given that us Pogues had made some enemies, and also the fact that we didn’t have so much as a pot to piss in, much less money to travel to Barbados, it took some work, a lot of time, and even more creativity on our parts before we finally reached Barbados. Once we did, I knew we needed to devise a plan to get back both Sarah and the cross. Of course JJ, as usual, came up with one of the worst plans I had ever heard. This saying a lot considering JJ’s had some really shitty plans, over the years. This one pretty much topped the other bad plans he’s had though; prompting all of us to shoot down his plan and come up with another one. Knowing it was either come up with a better plan, or go with JJ’s plan which will likely either get us all killed, or at the very least, we’ll end up locked up in some jail cell. In time we did come up with a new plan. Not a great one, but definitely better than JJ’s plan, so it was something, at least. For our part we decided one step at a time…

We’d wait till night, rescue Sarah first, and then once we had her safely out of that house and away from her deranged family, we’d devise a plan to get the cross back. I mean, it’s not like we could just knock on the front door, and request either. Not without being shot, that is. We couldn’t even break in and steal the cross without getting caught, since it was so damn heavy, it was going to take a hell of a lot of brute strength to carry it, so we’d just deal with that plan later. For now, my focus was on Sarah. Sure, I knew there was a chance I’d be the last person she’d want to see tonight, but given me and the Pogue’s rescuing her, or her remaining a hostage with her own family, I figured I was the lesser of the evils, so to speak. I justified as Kie and Pope remained look outs from the ground; keeping hidden to the garden area where they tried to remain unseen, while JJ and I went to the roof. With JJ’s help, he hoisted me down onto the balcony I had scoped out and learned led to the bedroom they were keeping Sarah locked in. Once I approached the balcony window, I peaked inside discreetly; making sure her family was nowhere in sight before I gave a couple of light taps on the window. My way of alerting Sarah that I was here. Of course the window was pad-locked, which just pissed me off more. How could they do this to Sarah? The Cameron’s definition of family was nothing more than a load of bullshit, if you ask me, because this isn’t how you treat family. I thought in building anger as I used the pin I had with me to trigger the lock. Once I heard it click, my eyes shifted up toward JJ. The thumbs up he gave me in reply assuring me he had cut the security system like he confidently told me he could easily handle. This was JJ, so although I’d trust him with my life, and well, I had a few times, I still held my breath as I slowly and gingerly opened the window; expelling a quiet sigh of relief when an alarm didn’t sound as I opened the window] Val…? [I quietly whispered her code name into the dark bedroom. Hoping it would soften any resentment she might have in seeing me here now] Vlad and the crew are here to spring you from here… [I further whispered into the dark bedroom as I waited for her to come over to the window; knowing we didn’t have long before someone would alert the Cameron’s that the security system had been hacked into, so the sooner we got out of there, the better our chances of getting out of here alive]

[ofnotakook]

The pogue plans never went according to plan. Not that Sarah was going to complain now considering. She was able to escape the bars that locked her into her old bedroom. She was tired of starving herself out of spite. She was tired of laying awake at night in fear that she might be dragged out of bed. She was tired of being forced to live the perfect life. Forced to smile for her parents; the only one in her family she liked was her sister Wheezie, she’s who I wanted to protect. But she had young opinions, didn’t see what our family was capable of. And given how much risk John B went through to find me, I had to go with him. Not that I wanted to stay trapped or that I’d risk his life to save my sister. 

I felt torn with myself now. I escaped; I was on the roof; I had survived the lies, I had survived my own father aiming a gun at me; of course to his unknown knowledge Ward did exceed in his aiming and catching fire on one of us. I doubted his attention was to hurt me. Yet again it felt like a toss up considering, he did try to strangle me to death; and drugged me to get onto that stupid boat. But I knew him to know the problem wasn’t my stubbornness, it was John B and the pogues. He was threatened, and right now the Camerons wasn’t my family; it was the pogues. I had chose them a long time ago weather I wanted to admit it or not. 

Safe; is what I felt; despite the pain that was pooling on my side; the white sweater was making it difficult to hide. But I felt his kiss; the graze of his lips on my head, a tenderness of who we were. A love language for us. Seeing as JJ had followed my lead; and started down the ladder; I had stepped forward turning my back to where my hues fell on the male I loved with all my heart. Despite our differences that did come to light when I uttered the words maybe we weren’t meant to be, to work out. 

A soulfulness in my stare as I uttered my words. “ Promise you’ll come down.” I mouthed the words “ I can’t lose you.” As my palm wasn’t already filled with my own blood. Taking my hand from side, I placed them firmly on the handles of the ladder, with one step and than the next. I caught sight of the droplets of blood hitting the ladder as I climbed down, It wasn’t until I reached the bottom, I felt JJ; place his hand on my hip in order to help me off when he wore this stunned expression. “ Sarah.” He mouthed, I knew he felt it; the blood that now covered his hand; I shook my head. “ Don’t say a word.” I had strength I’d be okay until I couldn’t walk anymore; He was about to say something when I hit him in the chest. 

John B would be in earshot; I couldn’t tell him yet; once we were in the clear I’d tell him, but I didn’t want him to worry about me, not after all the risks he took to save me. Pushing myself to the side, I eyed the small area where our feet hit the grass; Kie and Pope had to make it to the gates; where it led to the waterfront it was our get away. Our only glimmer of hope.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I promise. I’ll be right behind you. [I assured Sarah as I watched JJ go down the ladder first, to ensure it was safe for Sarah to follow. Once JJ gave the “all clear” signal, I gave Sarah and nod to begin descending the ladder] You’ll be okay. JJ will meet you at the bottom, and I won’t be far behind. [I reminded her as she started to descend the ladder. I ducked down lower to the roof as I heard the sound of more gunshots looming in the air. Once Sarah was about halfway down the ladder, I started to position myself onto the ladder; getting a good grip on the sides before I slowly began descending the ladder too. It wasn’t long before I could faintly hear Sarah and JJ safely at the bottom on the ground below the ladder, and I was following them moments later. After I reached the bottom, I noticed the concerned look JJ was giving me, but assuming it had something to do with the fact that we were all still in danger on the Cameron’s grounds, I didn’t question JJ on his strange look. Instead, I snaked my arm gently and protectively around Sarah’s shoulder; gently tugging her closer to me before speaking up in a hushed volume] Okay, we made it this far, which is great, but we’re not out of danger yet. Let’s get to Pope and Kie, and then all of us get the hell out of here. [I suggested before nodding my head toward JJ; gesturing for him to lead the way. The sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better our chances would be of us surviving this]

[ofnotakook]

He’d be right behind me. It was a sense of comfort knowing I wasn’t alone.That I was nearly to safety but the question lingered of how long. Because I felt the bleeding on my hip, I felt the lost of blood that peeled from my skin. Not that Sarah was about to utter a word. If she did their plan of escaping would be jeopardized. And JJ and John B had risked it all for her. Kie and Pope were on the lower ground taking cover on her behalf. Sarah wasn’t selfish; she knew when to take one for the team. Her dad; his shots that were fired. It was venages for her; for the Pogues brainwashing her; but the truth was Sarah saw beneath the scars. She saw the truth. The perfect knit family wasn’t real. She had hoped her father would be okay; that he would let her go. Let the pogues go give John B what was rightfully his. 

But instead he saw me as property. I wasn’t a person to him. I was his daughter yes; but I also was my own mind and heard. All that to say I tried not to shake when I heard the gunshots in the distance. I had my hands holding onto the ladder as JJ slowly helped me down. Blood it was obvious at the edge of the ladder; I easily shook my head to JJ; indicating John B didn’t need to know. I was fine. I Swore I caught an edge of concern against his expression. Did JJ care? I asked myself as feet hit the pavement; the edge of the roof as we lowered ourselves down to the ground. His arm was comfort; he was there with me every step of the way. 

Reaching up with my cleared hand; I intertwined my palm with his own. Above my shoulder as I forced a smile. “ almost there.” I whispered as i felt the throbbing on my side; the dripping of redness down my leg; I just hoped it was dark enough to hide. Enough to give us a clear out before I had to say the words. I was shot; a haunting thought as I saw Kie and Pope in sight. 

“ Once we step down one last step, run to the gates, there’s a boat waiting okay. I’ll get the keys.” I told myself it was a solid plan; despite my obvious discomfort to myself. I leaned up to press a kiss to John B’s hand lips against his thumb before I gave the nod to Kie and Pope. 

It was time to run; it was our only chance; even if it meant the Pogues leaving without me; I could handle my injury and my dad; but John B needed an escape or his life was at risk; and right now I cared less about me and more about his safety. “ Run.” Whispered as hands released his own as my body heavily dropped to the ground. Shots being fired; I leaned down enough to swat; to hide under until the walkway cleared.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I gave a nod of relief to Sarah and JJ once our feet finally hit the pavement below. Sure, I knew we still had a challenge ahead of us, even more of one now that Ward knew I had taken Sarah, so I guarantee he wasn’t the only one firing a gun currently. Now we had him, and his whole damn security department firing at us, too. Regardless, we made it this far, which to some, seemed like an impossible feat in and of itself, but we’re still alive, so that’s something. I justified optimistically as Sarah told us the next part of the plan. Good thing we managed to get her out, because JJ nor I had come up with an escape plan. In normal pogue fashion, we planned to wing it once we reached the point… You know, assuming that we made it this far, I should say] Okay, babe. [I said as I heard her instruct us to “run,” and then she released my hand. Given how close I had already come to losing her, I wasn’t about to let her out of my sight; especially in a dangerous situation like this. With that protective thought in mind, I hadn’t run far before realizing she was no longer at my side, or even behind me] Sarah? Sarah, where are you? [I asked in a hushed volume as I started to back track to find her. It didn’t take me long before I nearly tripped over her as she laid down onto the ground] What are you doing? Are you okay? [Assuming maybe she tripped and hurt herself or something, which is why she didn’t get up and continue running with us. Either way, I waited for the latest bout of gun shots to fade out before I helped Sarah up from the ground. This time snaking my arm around her to keep her close as we prepared to catch up with the others] Can you walk? [Prepared to carry her on my back if she was hurt and couldn’t run. Whatever it took to get Sarah safely out of here, I was all for doing it. Sarah’s safety and freedom was my top priority right now]

[ofnotakook]

A getaway plan; honestly Sarah could easily say she had the grounds of the priority mapped out in her head. But the times she’s visited this house she could count on her hand. It was slim; but right now she had to save herself or she risked the chance of Ward getting his hooks not just in her; but it put the pogues in danger. The same people who risked their lives in order to save her. Sarah didn’t take it for granted; she knew she was a mess. She was someone who was torn between love and her family. But she was locked in her own room on more than one occasion. Her father proved he only cared about the gold. It stung; it made Sarah feel like shit; like she wasn’t enough for her own father. 

But now wasn’t the time; the end was near. She felt her knees wobbly, she felt the lost of blood elevate against her frame. Feet planted against the pavement; her eyes scanned the grounds until they reached Kie and Poper who had keys in their hands; they found the keys to the boat under one of my rocks. It was kinda my getaway car back in the day when I wanted to be reckless; I wanted an escape; apparently it was my younger self telling me to be prepared. Because right now our best bet was to run. Run through the pavements; the mountains of trees to get to the edge. I whispered the words. JJ didn’t need any admission; he ran like hell while guns were being fired. Fired at us; which is why I ducked. Not voluntarily; I had fallen to my knees. I had fell right to the ground. I felt my lungs closing off; I felt the air in my body slowly leaving, as I felt my frame hit the ground in a huff. 

I knew John B; he’d never leave without me. I was kinda surprised he hadn’t picked up on the trail of blood I left on the roof; the ladder in my wake. But to my surprise my secret was that a secret. Eyes closed growing heavy that was until I felt his hands roll onto my own palms. Fingers curled around his hands as I slowly pushed myself back onto my feet. “ I’m okay.” A fat lie I screamed at myself. The dirty blonde moved in the threes; in the brushes; her sneakers ran across the lawn until she heard her feet against the pavement. “ John B.. If I fall behind I need you to run like hell okay.” A demand not an ask. The female whispered in a low tone as fingers tighten around his palm. “ I was shot..’ The words stuck on her tongue as she paused; glancing down to her hip; her hip where there was a big ass stain of redness under her sweater; the white sweater now red; she bit down on her lip in fear; and now she’d be the reason they got caught; from running for their lives. 

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what, I would never leave Sarah behind. She was everything to me. Including my favorite pain in the ass that I argued with like we were already a married couple. Point is, I loved Sarah more than life itself, and even though things were a bit up in the open currently between us, that didn’t matter, because I would always come for her. Case and point when I saw her drop down and without a second thought or hesitation, I went back for her and then waited until she was ready to move before we continued our escape. My face turned pale though as I could feel the blood leaving my cheeks when I heard her confession about being shot] What? You were shot? [Quietly repeating the words back to myself, as if trying to process it, but also hoping that I had heard her wrong and she’d correct me now. Judging by the blood I saw that had stained her shirt, I knew I hadn’t imagined it. My worst nightmare was happening now in the fact that Sarah was hurt] It’s going to be okay. I’ll get you out of here and then we’ll get you help. [I assured her. No way in hell of knowing if she was going to be okay or not. I mean, she was shot. With a bullet. She was bleeding, and I had no way of knowing how much blood she’s lost already, because I was just now hearing she was hurt] Let’s get you on my back, and I’ll carry you out of here. [My way of letting her know that, no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her behind, so this way, if we get caught, we’re going to do so together. I silently justified as I squatted down as low as I could, so Sarah didn’t have to strain too much to shift onto my back]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s family was the why the Pogue’s were in this mess. The why we were fighting for our life’s. Namely the finger needed to be pointed towards my father. The man who wanted to be a proud family man, adoring father was willing to aim guns at his own daughter. He chose a hell of a long time ago. I wasn’t the kook anymore; I was a pogue; the family I decided I wanted. My pure love and adoration for John B. He was my everything. The boy I wanted to bicker with day and night. The boy I wanted to run on adventures with. He understood me, I never felt alone with him; I never felt like I had to pretend. I always felt trapped, the need to run from how I felt those strong feelings until I met him. Until we kissed; and fell insanely in love. 

And this island; the gold being unreachable now; was on me. I was the one who believed in my dad; kept opening my mouth and claiming he loves me, he’d never hurt me. I was the fool a disgrace not only had my brother tried to kill me drown me, my own dad wanted me dead. I had nothing but John B and the pogue’s. They were all I needed. 

Each leg of movement was starting to cause a strain on my body. I had no issues running; it was the open wound on my abdomen that was preventing me from moving fast enough. Knees weak, I could barely keep up. I heard the others in a distant reach the boat; the boat that was gassed up; the keys I knew where they were hidden the backup keys I mean. I remembered going out on this boat as a child; for our family trips on the ocean. What an embarrassing moment now considering. Leaning over my frame; eyes staring at the grass that touched my ankles. Head moving to stare between my legs in order to catch my panting breaths. I felt weak, I said the words. And I swore I heard John B stop; he paused in disbelief but the writing was pooling down my legs; the droplets of blood obvious. Tilting my head up I bit down on my lower lip to hold in the whine the pain of my wound. “ John B..” Name lingered on my tongue as tried to find the how I’d get this boy to leave without me. Instead he decided to bend down to the ground. I hesitated, I didn’t want to hold him back. “ I..” I started but I also know this boy; he’d risk it all for me. It didn’t make sense for both of us to risk being caught here, but with last minute thinking I pulled myself onto his back. Arms wrapped loosely around his neck. Legs wrapping around his waist, once I was safely on his back I rested my head on his shoulder. “ You can move now..” I echoed in a nearly teasing retort. Keep it light; until we escaped. 

A death trap of my own making.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what happened, I would never leave Sarah behind. I wasn’t stupid. I knew us breaking into her family’s compound tonight to break her out was a death trap. It was a fool’s errand, but I didn’t care. Sarah was in danger. She might not see how deranged her father and brother are, but I knew. I saw first-hand what her psychotic father was capable of, so I wouldn’t put anything past him now. Including him hurting his own daughter just to ensure he kept her far away from me. The man was a damn lunatic and the sooner I got Sarah away from him, the better off she’d be. The driving reason I broke into her room tonight. Well, “prison” was probably a more fitting word given the bars her father had put on her windows, so she could be kept there as his prisoner. Asshole. I thought in disdain as we ran toward some semblance of safety. I stopped though when I realized Sarah was no longer behind me. Panic setting in since it was dark, which made it difficult to see. Following the sounds of her breaths and rustling through the grass as I back-tracked back toward her. Shock and fear washing over me in hearing she had been shot. A part of me wondering if taking her back to her father was the best course of action, since his ties and pull could have a doctor here in moments. Still, something told me she wouldn’t want to go back there. She’d choose to take the risk to keep moving] I’ve got you. Don’t worry. I’d never leave without you, Sarah. [I assuredly whispered out as I helped her get situated safely on my back; ensuring her arms were wrapped tightly around my neck and her legs secured around my waist before I started through the trees and such in search of JJ and the others] “John B? Where the hell are you?” [I heard the familiar sound of JJ’s voice airing out nearby in a hushed tone. Moving in the direction of his voice, I eventually caught up with them. Keeping Sarah securely on my back as we reached them] “Ready for the next part of the plan? The diversion?” [JJ asked with pride in his voice, which prompted a skeptical look from me. All of us knowing JJ wasn’t the best at plans, but I did feel better when Pope and Kie chimed in to share that they had actually helped with this part of the plan] If it gets us out of here, then hell yeah, do it! [I muttered out as I watched JJ throw a lit flare in the direction of the wooded area we had all just escaped from, before throwing two others in separate directions of the same wooded area. Listening and watching as I saw a small explosion go off, followed by another, and then countless more. Pope and Kie explaining they rigged those while they were waiting for us to break Sarah out. Chuckling in pride and feeling a momentary sense of victory as I realized we temporarily stopped Ward’s guards from catching up; prompting us to continue running the remaining way off of the compounds and then into the city. Now it was just a matter of finding a place to hide out and to get Sarah medical attention] Sarah was shot, so we need to get her to a doctor before we do anything else. [I explained to the others; watching the wheels practically turning in their head on how to work this one out without all of us ending up getting caught]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s greatest fear was her friends, was the boy she loved getting hurt on her behalf. She always believed in the good in her father; that he had made mistakes. But when it came to their family he always held their best interest at heart. But all the evidence was staked against him. He faked his own death; he was okay with putting his arms around my neck. He was okay with shooting a bullet not knowing where it land. And Sarah was caught in that crossfire. She was scared that her now slow pace would hurt the pogues in the end. Her new Family. And she knew better than to fight with John B, than to plead with him to keep going without her. He’d never leave her behind. He was noble, he was the man that loved her more than his own life. 

And she’d risk it all for him too. He was the light in her new darkness. Sarah tried to hide it; the trail of blood she now kept behind her. She held the wound to her hip as tightly as she could; until she fell. She fell forward breathing heavily feeling the impact of loss blood. She was trying to move forward in the deep grass; but her feet stopped. She had hoped the male had moved far enough forward to forget; about her. But his voice was like a compass calling her home. And she had to smile to herself as she pulled herself onto his back. Bitting down on her lip knowing she was in pain; that pain in her side, the pool of blood that was now hitting his shirt. Head slowly came to rest on his shoulder; weakness inside of her. “ I know..” She whispered in a weakened tone. She held on for dear life; she had her arms wrapped around his neck, and her legs slid around his waist; a sense of safety; as we neared the spot where the others were. 

The night was dark; no one noticed her pale face; the weaken state she was in. Another phase to the plan? Her eyes trailed over to the smirks of her friends; the explosions that they had in fact thrown in the direction of each guard growing on their tails. A small smirk tugged at her lips. Severs Ward right, to come for family; and you get burned. The others glanced at her; as the elephant in the room was exposed. She was shot; weak; blood pooling out of her as she spoke. “ I’m fine.” She said as she rested her head back down on his shoulder. She vaguely heard JJ make a plan. “ We run into town. There’s abandoned buildings, maybe we find a doctor office on our way.” It wasn’t settle or optimistic in any form; but maybe if we found supplies; I could stitch up my own wound. I had no desire to see a doctor again; nor could we trust any person wouldn’t go running to Ward. So I had barely said a word; leaving the decision up to John B; he was the fighter; the leader in this mess. I’d trust him; I’d follow him anywhere.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I nodded in response to JJ’s suggestion. No offense to my best friend, or anything, but when he came up with plans, they usually crashed and burned. Then again, his idea to break Sarah out wasn’t his worst plan. Mind you, she did get shot as a result of the escape, but I don’t know if I can necessarily blame JJ’s plan for that, or just pin the blame on Ward for being a deranged and psychotic piece of shit] I think heading toward the town is a good idea, but Sarah definitely needs a doctor. Kai, you still have the fake IDs we had made up for all of us, right? [Kai nodded in response while flashing me a confused look] Okay, so if we go to a doctor’s office or hospital, we can use the fake IDs, so Sarah’s identity doesn’t get back to her father. Either way, we need to get the bullet out of Sarah, and get her stitched up. That’s our first priority once we get off of this property. [I explained. Knowing Sarah was getting weaker from the blood loss, so the sooner we got her gunshot wound tended to, the more at ease I would feel that she’s going to be okay. Honestly, at this point in time, my only concern was Sarah. I kept that thought to myself though, because I knew if I startled to unravel with worry, everyone else would begin unraveling too. Bottom line, we weren’t going to make it out of this situation alive if we didn’t remain level headed and make the right decisions]

[ofnotakook]

Right decisions; was it ever in our nature? To be smart, to not lead on impulse? In the short time Sarah spend with John B and the pogues, she’s learned JJ and John B tended to make decisions on a whim. They tended to come up with a plan and without thinking ran with it. Granted it Sarah owed her life to the poges, she owed the idea that she was released from the bars of her own bedroom due to them. And she appreciated the fact given the limbo state the male and myself were tethered into that they risked it all for me. The wrath from my dad; the Camerons’s who I was learning spelled terrible news. Sarah always believed in her dad; the type of man he was. He was kind, he cared about his family wanted to provide for us. But the money the power it gave a person it tended to steamroll you into a horrible person. Sarah couldn’t believe her eyes; the lengths her dad was willing to go, harming his own daughter, embedding Rafe despite his own crimes. She felt disgusted with her own family. The blonde knew where she belonged; where her heart was. Holding onto dear life to the man she currently had her arms wrapped around. 

The blonde let nimble fingers graze over the thin layer of his shirt; the weak grip she held. Her wound was obvious, the blood pooling down her leg. Ward got her damn good. And Sarah hated her fate was on the edge of a line. Doctors wasn’t an option, she knew this island. She knew Ward was probably on a warpath now for blood. Pogues won by letting my escape happen, and now he’d be paying off any source he could, to get his hands on me. 

The female listened despite her own body was fading, head rested upon his head; the comfort of his scent, she was always safe with him. Eyes blinked open and closed, and she slowly let her weaken vision take in the pogue’s who glanced in every direction Smoke of the explosion was all in the air, intoxicating. “ Go South, we get on the boat, and port half way down the island, there’s a hidden office, our best bets is escaping this house.” A thought for food; a hidden doctors office; one that may get me home sailing. 

Without the risk of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised that, in spite of her condition, Sarah was the one to air out the best and most sensible plan. Giving a nod in response as I looked toward JJ and the others] You heard her. Head south. [I said in agreement as I continued carrying Sarah on my back as we all made route south toward the docks. Knowing our risk was still higher than not of getting caught, but she was right… If we had a chance of getting out of here and to freedom, this was the one with the best odds. More than anything though, I just wanted to get her somewhere safe, so she could get some medical attention. I could hear by how weak her voice was that she was losing a lot of blood. The longer this continues, the worse her chances of survival were. Once we reached the docks, we ducked into the shadows until reaching the boat. I made sure to get Sarah on safely, and then I laid her down across one of the seats to rest, while I helped JJ and Pope to untie the ropes; all the while Kai started up the boat. Knowing we’d all need to work together, and to do so quickly, or else we weren’t getting out of here alive] Okay, Kai, we’re clear. Get us the hell out of here. [I called out to her as me and the other guys pushed the boat away from the dock to give it an oomph and then once the boat was cleared from the sides, I returned to Sarah] How bad is it? [I asked as I grabbed the first aid kit stowed under the one seat. Not that I could do much with my incredibly limited experience and knowledge, but I felt helpless by not doing what I could for her now. Besides, if I could at least slow the bleeding, that would give her the best fighting chance to stay alive until we were able to get her medical attention]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt like she had lost everything. She used to be the girl who would always go to the beck and call of her dad; he used to be the incredible man she grew up with. He used to be the man who read bedtime stories to her. He used to give her a glass of milk each time. She had so many fond memories of him. But now; it felt like those memories were tainted. Sarah had always believed in him, she fought the urges to go against him. Seeing his boat explode it destroyed her; she broke up with John B the man she loved for him, because he was glad the man who took his father away got justice. Was dead. And suddenly it felt like our love wasn’t meant to be. 

And now Sarah was bleeding out because of the man who was supposed to protect her. He shot fire at her; at her friends not caring of the consequences. That was the sadness of the reality. That I was alone. I couldn’t turn to my sister, I couldn’t protect. I had to put myself first, and that was the pogues my made family. We lift each other up, we go to bat for each other. And I knew the high stakes. I knew what my father was capable of. I had to wonder how I had any ounce of love for him after what he’s done. Lying to protect Rafe, letting my brother get away with attempting to drown me, he let me get drugged. He’d rather put harm to me than take accountability. And I had to swallow that truth. With a heavy head I felt like my vision was becoming blur as I spurred the last task at hand. Hands loosen on the grip against John B’s shirt, as my eyes drifted shut. How long had we walked? Before I heard the rustling of feet hitting the docks. And I felt my body being dropped gently into the boat, back pressed against a hard backing on the edge. Slowly eyes lifted seeing blurs. 

Figures moving left and right; the “ Ropes done.” I heard from JJ as both boys plopped themselves down on the boat. Pope was at the wheel with Kie, I heard the soft whispers of nothingness. And I heard his voice, the one that always dragged me home. And I wanted to be honest, as my hand slowly nimbly moved against the dam fabric of my sweater as I lifted it up. And I saw it the blood, it was dark, and it explained why I felt faint. Turning my eyes to the man I loved; John B was preparing to bandage up the wound for a short time. “ It doesn’t look pretty, I’ll have a nasty scar if anything.” I aired out attempting to lighten the mood as I felt the boat move as if it was full of lighten. 

This remembered me of when I saved his ass, when we first started out; on our little adventure. A shy grin turned against my lips as I spoke. “ Last time one of us had to bandage the other up, I was sneaking you into the house, I saved your ass, are we finally repaying the favor?” I asked with a sense of teasing in my voice. Definitely not the time, but I needed a laugh a small brief moment for just us.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Although I knew now wasn’t the time for jokes and quips, I still appreciated the fact that Sarah was trying to keep the mood light between us. Maybe if the circumstances had been reversed, I would have been all for cracking jokes… Hell, I would more than likely be cracking them too. Given that Sarah had been shot and was rapidly losing blood though, I definitely wasn’t in a fun and games kind of mindset. For her sake though, I did flash her a grin as I leaned down to press a tender kiss to her forehead] Well, I figured I owed you so it was high time I stepped up and returned the favor. Maybe next time you want me to save you though, let’s go with something that involves less blood shed and need for panic… Deal? [Giving it my best effort to joke in return. In the meantime I grabbed the first aid kit. My hand shaking slightly as I quickly fished around for some bandaging and things I thought I could use to stop the bleeding] Either way, I’m putting you in charge of keeping an eye on me to make sure I’m doing this right. I mean, doctor stuff is new territory for me so I’ll need the supervision. All that to say, eyes open at all times, okay? [My casual way of requesting to Sarah that I wanted her to keep her eyes open. Afraid that if she closed them and fell asleep, I might lose her. A thought that I couldn’t bear to consider as I started to do what I could to apply pressure to her wound and then applied some gauze and then bandaging too, all in an effort to stop the significant bleeding she was currently experiencing]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was well aware of the bleeding that now wasn’t the time for her humor, for her need to crack a joke open. But Sarah could see how scared he was; it was in his eyes. She was scared herself that she was about to take her last breath, by the hands of her own father. Ward had no idea she was assuming that he had aimed for her; she had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. Her own father pulled the trigger; he was aiming a weapon at her friends, at the man she loved. And now she was facing deaths door; she remembered the last time. 

John B was the one aching in pain as she ran her fingers with a cold rag over his blooded wound; which is why the dirty blonde showed amusement. Or she was going nuts with the lack of blood in her system. Eyes had slowed movement as he spoke; and she knew this was his way of saying “ Stop Sarah.” As if she planned on taking a bullet tonight. But her smile soften knowing feeling the panic under his tone, and her slimmed hand; her hand reached to touch his arm as a soothing of reassurance that she was okay. “ I promise next time, I’ll tell my dad not to shoot.” She echoed with that sarcastic retort of hers. But Sarah was done with the jokes. Not that she had the energy. She felt like her body was giving out; she felt the color had now drained from her face in the dark. She barely felt the boat moving against the water; the ocean seas; the seas that used to bring soothing. That used to make her feel safe; and now she was trembling, she felt his hand on her wound; and she had glanced down the blood was soaking her skin, right through his hand. “ Use the guse to wipe around the wound, and then bandage it gently at least until we arrive.” To a doctor; assuming we had the money to get me treated; or this was the end. Her eyes landed back on his features, and she uttered an “ I love you.” As if it was the last words she’d say. 

Eyes kept fluttering open and shut in a daze, despite the promise to stay with him, to guide him through the process; she hardly felt her hand move down to her side; as if her limbs were jelly now. If only this boat would move any faster..

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I appreciated Sarah’s attempt to crack jokes now. That was kinda our thing, you could say, but at the moment, I felt far from laughing. I was worried and growing even more so with every passing second. Sarah was shot. She was bleeding out currently, and I had no way of knowing if we’d get her medical attention in time to save her] Speed up the boat! Let’s go! [I yelled out to Pope and Kie as I saw Sarah’s eyes close. Judging by the worried look on JJ’s face, I knew he was thinking the same thing I was] Hurry the hell up, JJ, and help me pack her wound. Quick, get those gauze pads from the bag! [My voice shaking in building worry as JJ did as I ordered; grabbing me what I needed as I tossed the now soiled and blood soaked gauze pads to the side as I took the clean ones from JJ’s grasp. My hand shaking as I pressed it against Sarah’s gunshot wound. After what felt like a damn eternity, the boat pulled to a stop. I didn’t exactly know where we were at the moment, but at this point Pope and Kie were tying off the boat to the pier, so it wouldn’t go anywhere, and then they rushed toward us] “Come on. I got word that there’s a surgeon in town who handles cases like this for the right price.” [Pope explained which prompted my brows to furrow in confusion] “Get Sarah, let’s go.” [Kie instructed, which prompted me to tape off the currently gauzed padding I had in place, then JJ helped me to lift Sarah carefully out of the boat and onto the pier. Once JJ and I were on the pier, I cradled Sarah securely in my arms] “Here, take this bag. It should be enough to get her treated. Pope and I will stay with the boat.” [Kie said as JJ grabbed the bag and the address of the warehouse doctor, and then we rushed through the dark night air toward the provided address. A less than ideal situation from all angles given Sarah’s condition and the fact that we were in an unfamiliar place looking for the location of a doctor that we knew nothing about. Talk about a wild card move, at its best] Stay with me, Sarah. We’re going to get you help. Keep fighting. [I called out to her as JJ barked out instructions and I merely kept up with his pace as I carried Sarah in my arms toward our destination]

[ofnotakook]

A scar that might kill me. 

It was a thought for Sarah; she felt like she’d been through the ringer. Her own family was willing to sacrifice her for their own benefits. Sarah once thought the world of her father; of the family. But now she knew the truth they only craved the wealth they’d stomp on anyone who dared to stand in their way. Sarah’s own brother tried to drown her, and now her father was the one who pulled the trigger. Obviously he was aiming for John B, but Sarah knew she’d always end up in the cross fire. 

Not that she cared, she’d rather die than live without him. The words she said that night; on the smaller boat, as John B fought for his life, to escape the death sentence. And I meant it; I loved John B and yeah we fought; we ended up screaming at each other. But i’d do anything to be with him, and now as I was fighting for my own life; I only hoped the pogues survived. Sarah was falling unconscious, she had felt her body shutting off. The last words she spoke were of love, an undenying world of love for him. But she felt the blood lost. She felt her wounds becoming fetel. And she heard the urgent, the eagerness in her man’s voice as she felt the vague packing of her wound. How long had it been? 

She had no idea, because she felt darkness overcome her. She felt like she was falling into limo. She barely felt John B and JJ as they wrapped her sim arms around their shoulders and held her up. Enough to look like Sarah was walking, but she was dragged towards the clinic, and she barely heard the exchange when the surgeon called the three up. And with each step, she felt a slight ache in her body. An ache she wanted to subside. But Sarach knew she had to fight; to live, to open her eyes again. She felt her frame fall to a bedding; as her head hung down as the surgeon whispered. “ It’ll be okay, fight.” And She fel the breathing tube come to her nose, she felt the bleeding that was exposed. The doctor mumbled a few words to her friends. “ Do you have the money? She may not live.” He uttered and I felt my body weak. My own shadow breathing as my eyes slowly woke, for a second to see the unfamiliar surroundings, the walls brown. The tubes connected to me, I was scared. But I couldn’t move before my eyes went shut all over again. 

The doctor took the money and he soon took a tool; to save me, if it did any good, because right now I felt like I was on the brink of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

“Yeah, man. Here.” [JJ aired out in response to the shifty doctor’s request for money, before handing him a bag with money in it. My eyes shifted into a roll watching the doctor count it. So much for a moral code to save a life. Apparently all this asshole cared about what money] Just save her. Please. [I aired out pleadingly as I held Sarah’s hand with my one hand; all the while gently stroking back the hair from her face with my free hand. After a moment or so the doctor seemed satisfied with the amount of money JJ gave him inside that bag, and then he began. Watching as he first put Sarah under with what I assumed to be some kind of anesthesia before he grabbed a questionable looking scalpel so he could begin making the first cut. I knew in my gut that trusting this doctor might be the worst idea we’ve ever had, but at the same point, our hands were tied. It was either this option or we’d lose Sarah. Sure, his “she may not live” statement didn’t leave me with much confidence in his skills, but I had to believe in Sarah now. Sarah was strong. She was brave. If anyone could fight this, it was her] Come on, baby. Fight this. Don’t you dare leave me. Fight, baby. Fight. [I gently pleaded in her ear before pressing a tender kiss to her forehead] “Keep watch.” [I heard the doctor instruct of JJ before giving me a knowing sort of look and then a nod] “Here we go.” [The doctor said in less than a confident tone as he made the first cut; taking the scalpel across Sarah’s skin in order to remove the bullet from her body. It was excruciating to watch, but I promised myself that no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her side] “Grab those gauze pads and some gloves. Pour some of that vial with sanitizing solution directly over the incision spot and then place the gauze pads firmly across the area to slow her bleeding. We don’t want her losing more blood than she already has.” [The doctor instructed; forcing me to release Sarah’s hand, so I could assist in the surgery. After what felt like an eternity, he finished; managing to remove the bullet and then to seemingly successfully repair damage to her wounded organ internally. Once he finished, he stitched her up then covered the wound with a significant amount of gauze pads and medical tape] “It’s a wait and see, at this point, so let’s hope she’s a fighter.” [The doctor said while washing his hands in the sink in the corner of the room] She is. [I flatly said in response before removing my gloves and washing my own hands once the doctor had finished. After ensuring my hands were clean, I returned to the table where Sarah rested and I took her hand in my own] You’re a fighter, Sarah. The strongest person I know, so fight this. I’m not going anywhere. [I had no way of knowing if she could hear me, but I didn’t care. On the off chance that she could, I was going to remind her of her strength and ability to fight this now]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt the screams into darkness. She felt like she was on a cloud in limo. She had no control of her body; she felt like she was paralyzed. She didn’t have the power to move, she barely felt her body being held up. She didn’t want to die, she didn’t want to be traped in her own bedroom. She never asked her own father to shoot bullets at her and her friends. Sarah suddenly felt like her once simply life was a cycle of nightmares. Death on our door steps, the rush of running; being on the med. Sarah knew her getting shot was her fault. If she had just listened to John B weeks ago; that Ward didn’t have my best interest at heart. 

If I had stayed with Pogues instead of trusting my now psychic family. One trying to kill me left and right. Sarah had learned her lesson, the only people she could count on was herself, the pogues, even her sister she just hoped her sister was okay. She knew she was stipid to be thinking about anyone but herself now. But she held sympathy for others. The aching in her body was enough to force her to scream in pain if she wasn’t knocked out. She vaguely heard the way her body gently was placed down on a mental table.  I vaguely felt John B his breath in my ear as he tried to reassure me I was okay, I was a fighter. I was in my own little bubble. The darkness in my lids, the way my body was lifeless, especially as the doctor did insert his tool into my body, if I was awake I’d be screaming. I barely felt it; probably from the anesthesia. I couldn’t move, I had no idea how long I was out. I could vaguely hear the voices as the doctor echoed out it would be touch and go. Would I be surviving? Was I still bleeding out? Sarah felt the stirs in her mind as she laid still. Baby, fight.. Words echoed in my ears. 

John B, he needed me, he needed me to be strong, to fight through the blood lost. I couldn’t let him down. I was groggy when I suddenly felt the strength to open my eyes. The small light above me it flashed my eyes forcing me to squit, and I felt John B’s head on my stomach, not on the wounded skin, but right under. I was aching as I let out a soft wine. My hand pale as I lowered my hand onto his dirty brown locks, fingers slowly combed through his hair. “ John B.” I echoed in a whisper; I couldn’t speak and I noticed JJ was sitting in the chair, eyes closed, even JJ stayed. A made family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Hours passed by and there was no change. Sarah was so still and I had no way of knowing if she’d ever wake up. The doctor didn’t sound hopeful. Made a snide remark about her chances of pulled through as he greedily took our money and then ran like hell like some kind of coward. Clearly it was all about money for him. As more time passed, I found my head resting against Sarah’s side. Near her incision but not close enough to cause any further damage. I just wanted and needed to be close to her now. JJ wasn’t far away. He took a look out to make sure Ward nor any of his men were nearby before he’d return to the private room here and take a seat in the chair adjacent from where Sarah and I rested now. I didn’t know how much more time had passed… Felt like an eternity even though I knew it was probably just a few more hours, but eventually I heard the faint sound of her voice, as well as felt her fingers rustle gingerly through my hair. At that my head immediately shot up and I looked at her. Relief flooding my face and expression currently] You’re awake! Thank God! [I uttered out in evident relief as I pressed a gentle kiss to the back of her hand] How are you feeling? The black market doctor left a few things for pain if you need it. [The guy wasn’t exactly reliable but he did seem to save Sarah’s life, so at the moment, I was thinking a bit more favorably of him. Maybe he wasn’t a total money-hungry quack after all. Jury was still out on that one though] Do you want some water? [I asked as I had already picked up a fresh bottle of water; prepared to give her some if she was thirsty]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt weak, she ha no idea as to how long she’d been laying her. The memory of her father; of how easily he had aimed a gun at her, at her friends because of what? Jealousy? Because he wanted to hold this wild control over her? Sarah had once desired to please her family. She had once idolize her father the memory of us at the docks when I was only a little girl it clouded who I knew he was. 

But a few hours before he was so willing to throw me under the bus. He was so willing to let me bleed out on our yard. Because of his hate for the Pogues. I was hurt, I was feeling betrayed but at the same time, relieved as I felt my body come to life. I felt my eyes lift open as I adjusted to the dim light. I saw JJ in the corner as my eyes peeled over to John B who had his head rested against my palm. And I knew I was lucky, he was here. He loved me, and I had to let my fingers run soothingly through his dirty blonde locks. A small smile peeled at my lips. And I knew I couldn’t move. I felt numb to my core as my body was now healing from the blood lost, Sarah wasn’t going to jump up, the fear of Ward on our tail was aching against my own skin. The blonde had peered up at him; the man she loved so much. 

“ I’m okay.” As okay as I was going to be. The wound had been deep, the stitched up wound was felt as my eyes slowly moved to the man I loved. My hand moved to reach for John B. And I felt a sigh of relief escape my own lips. And I felt my gaze linger on him. “ I’m sorry, I’m sorry my dad is a crazy,” My words could never compare to the pain my family has caused him, the pogues and I wanted to do my part to mend those fences. “ Yes.” I echoed to the option of water my throat felt dry but I wasn’t going to jump forward, I slowly lifted my head up to get to a sitting position. My free hand had moved to my side, knowing the pain; the wound my own family caused.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I felt mounds of relief when I heard Sarah’s voice. She was alive. She was awake, and she was speaking. Lifting her hand to my lips as I pressed a couple of kisses to the back of her hand, then gently lowered her hand back down onto the metal table she was lying on] Hey, don’t apologize. It’s not your fault. All that matters is keeping you safe and away from your deranged family. [No matter what, I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t let Ward harm Sarah again. I thought to myself as I brought a fresh bottle of water to Sarah’s lips, so she could drink as much as she wanted and needed. I knew she needed time to rest and heal, but the sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better I could guarantee her safety from her family. One could hope, at least. I mean the way Ward operated, and the fact that he knew people all over the world, I wasn’t sure exactly how far remote we would need to go, and for how long either for that matter, in order to keep Sarah safe, but no matter what, I’d do what it takes. I came close to losing Sarah this time… Too close for comfort, so I wasn’t willing to take any chances with her safety again. At least not until Ward was no longer a threat to her] Once you’re well enough, we’re going to get you out of here. Pope and Kie are keeping an eye on the boat, and when you’re strong enough, we’re all getting on that boat, and getting as far away as possible. We figure with some distance and preferably some place off the grid, eventually your father will stop looking for you. [Maybe wishful thinking since Ward wasn’t one who took well to losing, but one could hope he’d eventually give up and accept that Sarah was gone]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah kept asking herself the obvious how she’d been blind. How she was capable of still holding a torch of love for her family. With all the crimes all the ways her own brother tried to murder her; sending drug mules her way, being the one that nearly drowned her to death. And now her own father; was so mad at the Pogues so terrified of losing his daughter to the pogues; not wanting to lose the fight that he aimed and shot me. The blood that once covered her fingertips, the blood the redness that ran over her sweater, it was an image Sarah couldn’t erase.  

Her friends, her boyfriend? Cut into the crossfires because of her fucked up  family. And even now as she opened her eyes; said a few words, she felt the aching on her wound, damn that stitch is gonna hurt like hell. But it was comforting to feel his touch, to witness his lips touching her knuckles once again. John B, he was her anchor that kept her whole. A soften expression; a smile curled at the corners of her lips as she saviored his touch; his lips against her skin. “  They drugged me, they forced me here. I feel trapped like no one is safe in that house, but my sister..”  A fear for the little Cameron it rocked me whole now, as I felt the lump forming in my throat. Wheezie she was innocent had no idea who’s roof she was living under. Like myself; I’d been blinded from the truth. But now my father was deranged; he passed off onto Rafe; and Rose was clueless as ever a pond in the game; until she crossed Ward. 

A slight cough was heard; as the blonde felt the wetness hit her tongue, one sip of water turned into half the bottle until she released the top from her lips and she slowly sat herself up, her palms hitting the metal of the table to hold herself up. Nuts insane considering her own wounds she wore. But her eyes ran along John B’s features with ease. “ You know he won’t let that happen. He blames you the pogues for his princess no longer being in his care. I’m a game for him to win..” A sad truth, an ached formed in her chest now.  “ I wouldn’t blame you if you allowed the pogues to leave me here for  dust to get away. I don’t want to bring you down, or put you and pogues in danger..” Not again the words hid  at the tips of her tongue. 

Danger; our names, but Ward he’d kill to end the war..I was terrified the lengths he’d go no matter how safe I felt with John B; he’d get hurt because of me. A pill I needed to swallow now.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, that would never happen. [I flatly replied with a matter of fact sort of shrug. Sure, I knew if this was just about Sarah, maybe JJ and the others would have high-tailed it out of here. Not necessarily Pope since he had a heart to do the right thing, but Kie was what you could say, hot and cold toward Sarah, so it wouldn’t take much for her to bail on Sarah. And well, JJ hated Kooks in general, so he had no loyalties to Sarah either. Thing was though, they all knew I’d literally die to protect Sarah, and the Pogues would always put their lives on the line to protect each other. All that to say, as long as I was staying put at Sarah’s side, the Pogues wouldn’t be going anywhere either because they’d always have my back, just like I’d always have theirs too. We fought fiercely for each other] Even if the others decided to high-tail it out of here, I’d never leave your side. Unless you tell me to go, I’m not going anywhere… [I started to say before an amused smirk followed] And even then, I can’t promise I’d actually leave. You know I’m stubborn when people try to tell me what to do. [I teased even though that was the truth] Either way, once you’re well enough, we’re all getting the hell out of here, and getting to safety together. Until then, just rest and heal. [I said as I gave her hand another gentle squeeze. My way of reassuring her that we were all in this together; no matter what the outcome]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah knew her choices  as of late not only disappointed herself but those around her. Sarah never wanted the wealth, she never wanted to be accepted as the princess Kook. That title had been given to her. People made assumptions about her; her personality; how she followed the kook business, and yes once upon a time she was a kook. Bu from that one day running around with John B at chapel Hill, helping him seek answers to a quest she had no idea how over our heads we were. We were just kids running around aimlessly. But I saw that treasure hunting look in his eyes; the way his eyes lit up at a map, and I mused, I admired who John B. And he made me want more for myself. 

One day; one rain kiss on the docks was all it took for the dirty blonde to feel hooked. He’s who she loved, and even with death upon us; my dad probably having a search squad on our heads. I had let the pogues down; when I had let John B go, I was angry, I was sad when I thought my dad died, and john B was just so glad to see him fall through the cracks. My dad was money hungry, he was awful he killed, he allowed Rafe to get away with Murder, but he was my dad; but now as I groggily came out of my unconscious state; I remembered the cage I felt locked in. I recalled his aim, the gun shot wound that should’ve killed me. My own father aimed the trigger, and right now Sarah knew in her gut she was a pogue, and she appreciated the friendships she made. Eyes glanced over for comfort to the boy that made her heart race. And her pinky found his; a trace of her finger against his own. 

“ I made that mistake once, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for letting you go John B, I was..” Pausing briefly before a sigh could be heard escaping her lips. “ I was hurting, I didn’t want to believe my dad was this monster. I know you said you’ve always got me, but I wouldn’t blame you if you decided no one chances.” Chances to love me, to be together after this horror war my dad had, all the times guns aimed at us because of him, a war he wanted to win on behalf of me. One he already lost. 

Because my heart; who I was, it was a pogue; my known family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I get it, Sarah. Before I came into your life and opened your eyes to who your dad and brother really are, you had a really tight bond with your dad. Naturally you’d want to fight to protect his reputation. It only makes sense that you wouldn’t want to believe your dad was capable of something like that. If the situation was reversed, and it was me in your shoes, I probably would have done the same thing as you. [I admitted honestly. It was the truth. If this was my dad, I would have fought to protect his reputation too. It’s what you do for the people you love. I’d do it for Sarah and the pogues too because I consider them my family. No matter what, I’d always have their backs, just like I know the pogues would have mine] You’ll never run out of chances with me, Sarah. I hate to break it to you, but I love you, so until you say otherwise, you’re stuck with me. [As much truth as there was in my words, I aired out that honesty with a joking tone] Anyway, for now, we just need to get your strong enough that we can move somewhere safer for the duration of your recovery. [I knew where we were would suffice for now, but it would only be a matter of time before Sarah’s dad figures out we’re hiding out here currently. We’d cross that bridge if and when the time comes. For now I wanted Sarah to get a little stronger and heal up a bit before we decide to move her]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah had always been privileged growing up. She knew of the different layers of the island. She never wanted to believe in herself to judge others; the living, how some had to work harder than others. But Sarah was guilty to pulling away when it felt messy and difficult. When someone got too close to her; she was the one guilty of running. The fear of being seen truly. It’s what happened with her friendship with Kie, and it was easy to blame the split on how John B reacted to her father’s then death. But the truth was Sarah was scared. 

Scared of letting go of the shielded life she lived, the ground beneath her gone. Her family shattered into pieces. Her dad wasn’t the man she once admired. He was a monster; he felt threatened he knew I wasn’t under the spell, and he tried to hurt me. My own brother tried to kill me, did I feel safe with my family? No I was shot because of my dad, and now I felt the numbness against my skin. The numbness that tingled the layer of my stomach; where the scars stood. I wouldn’t blame John B if he wanted to cut loses here, and leave me stranded. But I knew him his heart; the good boy inside of him; the boy I loved with every fiber inside of me. “ It’s not about him anymore. I knew who he was; he wasn’t the dad I once laughed with on the beach when I was a little girl, he knew he lied, he knew what he did, and my brother is protecting him. I’m sorry for the pain my family caused you.” The pogues hanging onto my lips. 

Hearing the words; unlimited chances hung in the air. I love you; and I loved him, I wouldn’t let the male get away from me again. Sarah tried her best to master the pain, the smile heated against brims as her hand grasped hold of his fingers. “ I love you.” words spoken as the blonde attempted to sit up using the strength of her elbows to hold her upper frame upright. But she knew staying put wasn’t an option; Ward had his minions surroundings areas; I would gasp through the pain than get caught. An intense stare hinted into my features as I spoke. “ John B.. we have to move. I can handle the pain. This island isn’t safe not with my dad, he has people..” And I knew Ward; he wanted power; to hold an angle, and us staying still didn’t feel safe; for me or the pogues.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I knew Sara was right… We had to move sooner rather than later. We were basically sitting ducks here. Ward had this whole island in his pocket, so it would only be a matter of time before he got wind of the fact that we were here. I’ll be damned if I did all this work to break Sara out of there… And then to get her the help she needed after she got shot, just for that deranged idiot to take her back to the prison he had her encamped in] Okay, if you’re sure you can handle it, we’ll move. [Worried if she busts a stitch she may bleed out though] We need to take it slow though. Be smart about this. We can’t afford you busting any stitches. If you bleed out… [I trailed off. Not even able to finish off the thought of that possibility] Let me tell JJ we’re going to move. [I said as I pressed a kiss to Sara’s forehead; letting my lips linger there for a second or two before I broke away. It was almost like I didn’t want to let her out of my sight; fearful I’d lose her] Be right back. [I promised as I briefly and reluctantly left the table she was resting on in order to find JJ, who was keeping watch just outside] We’re moving. We need to get off of this island. Alert the others. [JJ agreed; immediately pulling out his phone to message the others to get the boat ready for our momentary departure. In seeing JJ got the ball rolling on that, I returned to Sara. Preparing to move her once she gave me the okay. I still felt unsettled about us leaving, but at least night had set in, so that would give us the advantage as we used the darkness, shadows, and any alleyways we could find to our advantage] Just tell me when, and I’ll help you off the table.

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was embarrassed of who her family was now. It used to be a loving home, used to be a place of safety. The countless family dinners outside on the docks by the grills. The countless boat rides we had. The loving embraces from her dad; he used to be a home for her. And now when she thought about Ward all she felt was anger, betrayal. Someone who only cared about greed, he went out of his way to coverup a death, to frame John B, and now he even if it was an accident he shot me. I was stitched up because of him. All that to say; I didn’t want to be stuck on this island for one more minute. I was on edge, my hand touching the bandaged wound, as I felt the pain. We’re sitting ducks; Ward had his minions all over the island; it was possible he’d be hunting me down. This was a lowkey office; and I doubted this bystander of a doctor was on the payroll. 

I was aching, I didn’t want the drugs, but I also had to put the pogues first; John B first. They came to Nassau for her, Sarah didn’t care if she was limbing in pain whimpering as she sped up to walk as long as we ended up on that boat and made our way back to OBX a home, a new safety. We’d find a way to the gold; our rightful place of earnings. Sarah could see the concern written on John B’s face now, but she was okay. A smile of reassurance coming from her now. She laid kept on the metal table now, as she nodded, biting down on her lower lip to hold out on any pain. “ I promise, slow and steady wins the race.” I added with a joke, Sarah found her more humours side with him. The touch of his lips on her forehead, it made her insides turn, the butterflies now. Sarah had waited until John B had stepped outside to inform JJ before she was able to slowly sit back up. Damn the shooting pain that ran up her side. Deep breaths, Sarah was about to move to step down from the table when she heard her boyfriend, A soft brave smile came to her lips. Reaching out her hand to grasp hold of his arm for support. “ We need to move. I’m ready.” Her stitching may not be; but I could rest once we got safety; but until the docks came into view the dirty blonde wouldn’t feel at ease. 

An unsettling feeling at the pit of her stomach.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised the second I offered my help to Sarah once she was ready, she didn’t hesitate to take my hand. Anybody else would be feeling sorry for themselves and their situation, but not Sarah. She was a total bad ass. By far, the bravest person I knew. Thing was though, I hated moving her. She nearly bled out and died after being shot. Her stitches were the only thing keeping her from doing so now, so what she needed more than anything was to rest and heal. Problem was, her deranged father and his entourage of employees that would be on the look out for us. I didn’t like having to move her from here, but it was either this, or get caught by her father’s people. Neither outcome was ideal, which was why I left the final choice up to Sarah. Her answer clear as day when she held out her hand and took a hold of my arm for support] I can carry you. I’ll do the whole slow and steady thing… Taking your word on the winning the race part you joked about. [Flashing her an amused grin. Knowing now wasn’t the time for fun and jokes, but maybe we both needed a little light humor given the shitty circumstances we were facing. I silently told myself as I helped her off the metal table she was lying across and then kept a secure hold on her until she was steady on her feet] You good? [Needing to know she was okay before I made any further movements or plans]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah should’ve been more hesitant to move. Given the amount of stitches her body had to have, the amount of blood she had lost from that gunshot. The one that came from her father. Sarah if she had too much time to dwell on it would start feeling useless a burden to her own family. Because one her dad was willing to lie for Rafe, yet the innocent child like myself was left to scrape by. Pick a side, and my heart was with the pogues, with John B. And my brother was a bit deranged now, but I suppose father like son, Rafe had to get that attitude from somewhere didn’t he? 

I fought the urge to roll my eyes now. As I found that strength to lift my body up to sit and reach my feet the white tennis shoes to the ground. And I did and felt that aching pain on my lower abdomen. Where the stitches were, and as John B came to view I wore a gentle smile as I reached to brace myself for the pain as I put the weight on my feet. Fingers wrapping around his forearm you felt his muscles now as I found my courage to fully stand. “ I don’t want to make it harder for you to run, I’ll try to keep up.” A promise to my heart, but if John B and the others got hung up because of me I’d never forgive myself. The pogues were in a tough spot because of me. And I hated it, I’d rather bleed out on that table than for them to get caught. All that to say, my hand slid into his bigger palm with a squeeze. “ I’m ready, let’s meet the others.” Conviction in my tone as with an easy step started towards the exit doors; to leave, before my dad found us, before we felt in hot waters.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, I don’t want to run the risk of you popping one of your stitches and bleeding out, so we’ll take it slow and steady. Hell, if we have to crawl there to keep your safe, then so be it. [Mind you I didn’t expect either of us to crawl, obviously, but I was just trying to prove a point now. No matter what risk came to me, Sarah’s safety and well-being would always be my top focus. I silently thought to myself as I gave her hand a gentle squeeze] I’m good carrying you if that will be easier and less painful than you having to walk. [Fortunately the pier wasn’t far from here, but the problem was, we couldn’t exactly walk right down main street to get there since Sarah’s father, no doubt, had people out there looking for us. Nah, we needed to take the most discreet way possible in order to keep ourselves from getting noticed before we reach the boat that would hopefully get us the hell out of there] JJ’s right outside waiting for us… He’s already figured out a plan with the best route we should take to get to the pier where the boat’s waiting for us. [I explained as I securely and protectively held her close to me as she got on her feet; giving her a nod in reply as she gave the “okay” that she was ready] Walking or do you want me to carry you? [Knowing Sarah had an independent side to her so I figured I’d leave the decision up to her]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was fierce and strong. She felt the harbor of why us Pogues were on the run now. It was due to my father. Who had once been the apple of my eye, once been a dependable man. Once been someone I counted on, but he was the one who shot that aim. And landed me fighting for my life. Sarah was scared not that she’d say the words. She was scared of popping her own stitches now. Scared of taking a last breath. And John B he was by my side; he was a good person, even if I got angry with him from time to time. 

“ I’m okay.” An insistent of words. I’m fine. I definitely felt the wound, I felt that skin split when I stood up onto my feet. But i figured if i said the words long enough they’d be true. Sarah was a fighter; she tended to jump into the line of fire without care. And in this case; the pier wasn’t far, her idea of the island she knew it from the back of her head now. And Sarah wanted to be a leader; she wanted to feel empowered to get us pogues out of this mess. And as she stood to her feet; she nodded with a smile, genuine and sweet for him, as her hand laced through his own. “ Okay, but are we sure JJ’s plan is the best? He tends to have outcomes that come knocking on his door..” A grossome expression on her features now, as her hand made its way to his arm, as she prepared to jump on his back. “ I would love to walk John B, but my stitches, my pain level is a 10 right now, so carrying me is best..” Assuming the offer stood. I knew John B he wanted me to be comfortable. 

I was independent by nature, I had my own strength but even I felt that lower pain each time I moved, pick battles and right now I just wanted to be off my feet, and in his arms. A smile a batting of eyes now as I slowly hopped on his back legs wrapped around his waist to prepare for our trip, to the docks, to our ride home.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Eh… [I shrugged slightly in response to her question about JJ’s plan. It was a fair question. JJ was one of my best and most trusted friends, so I’d have his back no matter what, but with that aside, even I couldn’t deny that his track record with his plans working out wasn’t the best. In fact, they failed more often than not. This time around, it seemed like our only option, so even if the odds weren’t necessarily in our favor, we had to give it our best shot] It’s not a great plan, but unfortunately our only option currently. [I confessed. Knowing I couldn’t ever lie to Sarah] In his defense, this seems to be one of his better and more thought out plans, so fingers crossed. [No, that answer wasn’t ideal, or even all that convincing, but again, I couldn’t lie to Sarah. That’s how I felt, so it was a run like hell and hope for the best type of plan right now] Okay, I’ve got you. No matter what. [I assured Sarah as I carefully lifted her up from the floor and into my more than capable arms; cradling her protectively close to me as we cautiously exited the warehouse, met up with JJ who was keeping watch for us right around the corner, and then we started toward the dark alleyways and vacant roadways in an effort to go as unnoticed as possible as we raced like hell toward the boat where the rest of our friend group was waiting]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah had leaped into the pogue life. She had leaped into the trust for John B. She was back to stepping outside of the bubble wrap. It was rushed up adrenaline, it was the adventure, but in this point in time Sarah was scared. Her father had shot at her; the man she once thought stood on a pedestal was the man responsible for her injury. The blood stain through her sweater, the man who put gates over her windows to prevent her from leaving. He grew up on the cut, he transformed his life; he had wealth now. I once admired him, but now when I thought of his face I felt this twirling in my stomach as if my stomach was dropping. 

I was achy, my lower abdomen was in pain, the drugs, the stitching was only going to hold for so long. I knew JJ his lack of track record had spoken for themselves, and I saw that not so trusting expression cross the male’s face even for a split second. But as we established out time was limited before the streets would be swarming with guards, with police, as my father as the huntsmen. I had to swallow any doubt I had, and believe in the only option us pogues had. With a short less than confident bob of my head, the blonde had slipped her arms around John B’s neck, leaning her head on his shoulder, the comfort of his hold. And She wrapped her slander legs around his waist once her grip was in solid ground, she braced herself for the race against time. 

Alleyways with the boys, the short cuts and I had pointed ahead to the marina, where I knew our little boat would be waiting. “ Just straight ahead.” I whispered as if I once grew up here; on this soil summer nights at the beach, late nights on the boats enjoying the sun going down, watchful moons. And now we’re running away; to where? Outer Banks which was once paradise on earth. Hearing from the distant alarms rang off in my head. 

Cops? Worrisome laid out on my face. Let’s hope the others had the rope in hand and ready to back into the ocean the second we landed on the boat.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

No matter what, we’ll figure it out. That’s one thing about the Pogues… Are track record and planning aren’t always great, but we always find a way to get our asses out of trouble. [I joked. Not that this was a time for jokes or quips but I figured Sarah wouldn’t mind the a slight break from the stress and obvious worry she was feeling currently] Besides, when plan A doesn’t work, we’ve got like twenty-five other letters to work through. [I said optimistically while a smirk creased my lips. JJ leading the way; pausing briefly to as we came to openers to make sure nobody was around to catch up before he’d signal with his hand for us to continue] We’re close… [I murmured more so to myself in relief as I saw the waterway approaching. I was eerily confident that if we could make it to the boat without getting caught, that’d we’d be home-free to get the hell away from this island. Sure, I knew it wouldn’t be as easy as I was optimistically trying to write it off as, but I wasn’t anything if not hopeful. Besides, I couldn’t let anything happen to Sarah, so I’d do whatever I needed to in order to get her out of here safely]

[ofnotakook]

Which was true. All joking aside, the pogues had a way of wording or acting themselves out of trouble. The amount of times they’ve nearly gotten themselves thrown in jail and survived. Sarah wasn’t worried about the backup plans, nor was she concerned about putting her trust out in John B. Because she’d trust him with her life. 

It was the sirens, it was alerts that kept cycling through her head. Her fingers held tightly onto John B she swore he felt her grip through his shirt. All that to say, Sarah was nervous. She also knows the island, and her father. He didn’t do well with losing, and when he didn’t have the princess Kook on his side; it was safe to say the man got nervous. And the dirty blonde wasn’t a trophy to be tossed around. Sarah was smart, had her own mind. And this game, this idea that he could steal from the pogues, fake his death it rubbed her wrongly. “ I trust you.” Was all the female was able to muster. Before the crashing of waves were heard, the docks in the clear. I spotted our little boat, the pogues, as Kie waved us over. Leaning my head closer into his neck, I pressed a small kiss to his neck as I leaned my face into him, a smile blossoming on my lips. 

Home free, and as our shoes hit the dock, inches away from the rope of our friends, I spotted the police car, a horn sounded to stop. “ Go.” I said as I aired out with urgency, because it was run or flight, and there’s no way my injury was for nothing. 

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I couldn’t help but to smile when I heard Sarah confess that she trusts me. It boded well for me that she did because let’s be honest, our plans were far from successful the majority of the time. Let’s hoped this latest plan wouldn’t be one of those failed missions. Either way, though, I wasn’t going down without a fight. Especially knowing I held Sarah’s life in my hands right now, too] I got you. [I replied reassuringly as I heard her urgency for us to go. At that, I didn’t hesitate to pick up my pace toward the boat where Kie was waving us down. JJ got into the boat first, then offered his help as I carried Sarah and I into the boat. Fortunately for us, Pope had already started up the boat] Everyone lay low… Let’s get out of here without anyone seeing our faces. [I instructed. It was a fifty-fifty shot that someone would recognize Pope, Kie, or JJ, but Sarah and I definitely needed to keep ourselves low and out of notice at all costs. We were close now… About to put some necessary space between us and Sarah’s father, so we couldn’t blow it now. I thought to myself as I grabbed some towels I found on the floor of the boat and covered Sarah and I with them as Pope put the boat into gear and worked to get us out of this harbor as quickly yet subtly as possible. The key now was to avoid bringing any unnecessary attention to us so we had to remain low and act as naturally as we could]

[ofnotakook]

Our relationship may had felt on the edge of late, the split heavily on our minds, a lack of empathy, a lack of care to others feelings. But when push came to shover John B was a protector, he was someone I trusted to keep me safe, that I was in safe hands if I wasn’t able to take care of myself. Her father used to be an important person to her; but every time we spoke now it was like talking to a wall. He only cared about the gold the money he stole from the pogues. Sarah didn’t believe a word Ward said, plus he locked her up like she was a prisoner instead of his own daughter. Not to mention her little sidekick the bandage on her lower hip was a gift from dear old dad. 

Her family wasn’t hers anymore, it was unhinged, unsteady. She was nearly killed by two members of her own family, blood shed it stayed with her, as fear now built inside of her. Sarah wanted safety, and as she heard the reassurance in the male’s voice her arms securely tighten around his neck as he ran like hell to get to the boat. The roared engine of the boat was faith, With her body slowly hitting the deck of the boat, she quickly laid herself down against the floorboards, towels came down on top of John B and herself; eyes pried on us. Yet our friends no attention was drawn upon them. Sirens getting closer as she felt the boat movement, her hand instinctively had reached for John B under the towels, as a deep breathing of exhale came and went. 

Pope behind the wheel as the boat moved from the dock, JJ being JJ you could hear his own amusement as he aired out “ Have a great day.” To the officers I assumed and you could hear Kie swat his arm of disappointing nature. A roll of my eyes under the towels now, as we waited for the call; the indication we were safe. Our boat swayed against the ocean blues, swiftly. All we needed was a sign; ensure the threat was in our rearview mirror.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I flashed JJ an amused smirk and a head shake when I heard his cocky remark to the officers while you could practically hear Pope's heart pounding rapidly as he pushed firmer on the throttle to get more distance between the boat and the marina. None of that mattered now though. Sarah was safe... At least for now, and I fully intended to keep it that way. Now it was only a matter of reaching a place where we could get Sarah the medical attention she likely needed, but her father and deranged family wouldn't find out about it. More than anything, I just wanted Sarah and the others safe. Her father knew a lot of people though, so it was going to be a challenge, to say the least. Given all the challenges and hell the pogues have been through over the years, I was confident we had this one too. Let's hope my confidence would pay off this time around]

[ofnotakook]

I can always trust in you

@apogueforlife 

I can always trust in you 

Trust; it had to be earned. Love; it had to be developed. For Sarah she always had her guard up. Each time she’d get close to letting someone in the other shoe would drop, she’d freeze up, and run in the other direction. With each boyfriend she ever had she had the urge to run. To distant herself when she felt like she was trapped. When she felt the pressure to feel more than what she did. Topper he liked the idea of her. He loved the idea of being with her; but he wasn’t in love with her. 

There’s only one boy Sarah loved; and that was John B. It happened unexpectedly. It happened on a day she never saw coming. That day stayed with her. The day we went to chapel hill; the day we had fun dressing each other up. The day we pretended to be our alter egos; Val and Vlad. It was nice to be herself. I didn’t feel the pressure to be perfect. I didn’t feel like my family was watching me, I was myself. I felt safe, I felt like John B saw me despite all the flaws I had. He loved me for me, and I loved him. It was a roller coaster of a relationship if you asked me. We had gone from barely knowing each other; to falling completely utterly in love. I gave up my kook card for him. I knew the obsluces we’d be facing now, the pogue’s vs the kook. But nothing made me question my loyalty to him. To the Pogues. It got messy with my dad; him being the reason Big John was gone. The reason why the gold was taken. The reason I was on the run with John B. The gold felt so close yet so far. We managed to clear John B’s name but that’s because Ward decided in his best interest to fake his own death and act like the hero. The guy that claimed to have been a killer in order to protect his own son. Rafe just the thought of being near him made me sick to my stomach. For a second I was upset, I felt like my whole body ached when I witnessed the boat blow up. When I witnessed my father shatter beyond the sea. And that’s when I saw the truth; what led to us being torn apart; what led to John B and I no longer being together. He had been happy to ward dead; and I couldn’t exactly find the words to blame him. He took everything from him. But at the end of the day; he was my dad. I was hurting and I remembered that look all too well; the look of proudnessI felt like I was seeing another person. I was grieving the dad I once looked up to, to the dad that I was once his princess. I needed John B to hold me, to make me feel like it was always going to be okay. But it suddenly felt like us it wasn’t meant to be.. 

Walking away for yourself; was all you could do. It was hard to be near him; to be pulled back into the adventure; to the cross. But for Pope I’d be there; awkwardness assured. Sarah didn’t know if she should make eye contact with him; or just stay silent. Silence seemed better; until that night; we had a plan to get the cross from Rafe; the big truck was parked outside my house. JJ and Pope were hidden behind the bushes. I was determined to walk inside; to get the key to unlock the truck; how we’d get the heavy cross out was a big ass story of it’s own. But I had made two steps to the gates, one glance backwards; I saw him John B was about to get up; and for a second I found myself hopeful; maybe this was the moment of the unknown. What comes next? Dark hues met for a second and I swore the air was taken out of my lungs; but he didn’t budge, didn’t move. Giving me the indication we had nothing left to say. That was the last memory I had of him; of us staring at each other. 

Head leaned against the gated up windows of my room at the barbados house, The house I was locked into. The boat felt like a nightmare; I was drugged by my own family. Rose had put a drug in my tea. Rafe and had helped her execute the plan; to force me here against my will. I remembered telling Ward when he claimed John B only cared about the treasure about the gold that I was just stuck in the cross hair that he was wrong. That John b would find him and come for him once I went missing. How wrong had I been? I wanted to blink back the tears that dared to fall. I was a pogue at heart; I chose it for John B because I loved him, despite our differences he’d always have a permanent place in my heart. It had been weeks since we left on the boat, I had tried to zone out the conversations of my parents; I had pretended to be sleeping at times, but here once I had been pulled into my room I never left. I guess Ward was afraid I’d run, or threaten to tell the cops his own daughter was kidnapped against her will. Give or take. Sarah swallowed the lump in her throat; it had gotten dark. She smelt the tray of food that her sister left her outside the door. Her bed was an inch away; The light pink covers still in place, it had been a day or two since we arrived, and I had slept in my bed because that meant i was okay, that meant that I was adjusting to being here; in this house. When all I wanted was to break free. At the window, on the seat where my back was pressed against the wall. Head tilted towards the window, I could see the water; any boats that passed by. I was alone; and all I could hope was that the Pogue’s were okay that perhaps my dad was right they managed to get the cross and that’s all that mattered for Pope. Eyes moved to the stars; for a moment it was nice to believe we were looking at the same stars; as if John B was on his way; assuming my dad was lying. For now all I could do was hold hope; I’d find a way out; it was a done deal. 

Tomorrow; I’d work out a plan. The Pogues would have me, if I found him. We’d always have each other. A wistful thought as a hint of a smile tainted onto my lips.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Love. Definitely not something I ever believe really existed. I always saw it more as, in life, people come and go. The ones who matter will stick with you, through thick and thin. For me, that was the Pogues: JJ, Kie, and Pope. I don’t remember a time in my life when those three weren’t part of it, and something tells me, I’ll never shake them either. Not that I’d want to, cause they’re everything to me. Then Sarah Cameron busted into my life unexpectedly… One of those surprising moments where I got myself in a sticky situation, and Sarah Cameron, of all people, was the one who bailed me out of it. Even more surprising though was how I felt when I was with her. It was the first time in my life when I found myself wanting to be with a girl exclusively. In time she even made me rethink my original theory about love. Then, well, I guess you could say life happened, and we broke up. Sure, I knew I played a part in our break up. When her father died, I should have been more supportive of the toll that loss would take on Sarah. Yeah, the guy was bad news… A lying crook, which Sarah obviously knew too, but he was still her father. Given the bad blood I had with Ward, and also the fact that he murdered my father, could you really blame me for being relieved that the guy was finally gone? Right or wrong, it’s how I felt. This leading to the end of Sarah’s and my relationship. Still, in my heart I knew this wasn’t the end for us. A love like ours always finds a way back to one another. Naïve or not, I refused to see it any other way…

Then weeks passed and I was starting to wonder if it really had been the end for us. Mind you, I still wasn’t giving up, but instead of dwelling on what may or may not happen between me and Sarah, instead the Pogues and I focused on getting the cross back for Pope. It actually became a, “Kill two birds with one stone” type of adventure for us though, since word got to me that Sarah had been abducted by her family. Them ultimately boarding a ship with Sarah and the cross, allegedly heading to Barbados; knowing that was exactly where we would be going to. This was it… This was our chance to, not only help Pope get the cross back, but also for me to rescue Sarah too…

Given that us Pogues had made some enemies, and also the fact that we didn’t have so much as a pot to piss in, much less money to travel to Barbados, it took some work, a lot of time, and even more creativity on our parts before we finally reached Barbados. Once we did, I knew we needed to devise a plan to get back both Sarah and the cross. Of course JJ, as usual, came up with one of the worst plans I had ever heard. This saying a lot considering JJ’s had some really shitty plans, over the years. This one pretty much topped the other bad plans he’s had though; prompting all of us to shoot down his plan and come up with another one. Knowing it was either come up with a better plan, or go with JJ’s plan which will likely either get us all killed, or at the very least, we’ll end up locked up in some jail cell. In time we did come up with a new plan. Not a great one, but definitely better than JJ’s plan, so it was something, at least. For our part we decided one step at a time…

We’d wait till night, rescue Sarah first, and then once we had her safely out of that house and away from her deranged family, we’d devise a plan to get the cross back. I mean, it’s not like we could just knock on the front door, and request either. Not without being shot, that is. We couldn’t even break in and steal the cross without getting caught, since it was so damn heavy, it was going to take a hell of a lot of brute strength to carry it, so we’d just deal with that plan later. For now, my focus was on Sarah. Sure, I knew there was a chance I’d be the last person she’d want to see tonight, but given me and the Pogue’s rescuing her, or her remaining a hostage with her own family, I figured I was the lesser of the evils, so to speak. I justified as Kie and Pope remained look outs from the ground; keeping hidden to the garden area where they tried to remain unseen, while JJ and I went to the roof. With JJ’s help, he hoisted me down onto the balcony I had scoped out and learned led to the bedroom they were keeping Sarah locked in. Once I approached the balcony window, I peaked inside discreetly; making sure her family was nowhere in sight before I gave a couple of light taps on the window. My way of alerting Sarah that I was here. Of course the window was pad-locked, which just pissed me off more. How could they do this to Sarah? The Cameron’s definition of family was nothing more than a load of bullshit, if you ask me, because this isn’t how you treat family. I thought in building anger as I used the pin I had with me to trigger the lock. Once I heard it click, my eyes shifted up toward JJ. The thumbs up he gave me in reply assuring me he had cut the security system like he confidently told me he could easily handle. This was JJ, so although I’d trust him with my life, and well, I had a few times, I still held my breath as I slowly and gingerly opened the window; expelling a quiet sigh of relief when an alarm didn’t sound as I opened the window] Val…? [I quietly whispered her code name into the dark bedroom. Hoping it would soften any resentment she might have in seeing me here now] Vlad and the crew are here to spring you from here… [I further whispered into the dark bedroom as I waited for her to come over to the window; knowing we didn’t have long before someone would alert the Cameron’s that the security system had been hacked into, so the sooner we got out of there, the better our chances of getting out of here alive]

[ofnotakook]

The pogue plans never went according to plan. Not that Sarah was going to complain now considering. She was able to escape the bars that locked her into her old bedroom. She was tired of starving herself out of spite. She was tired of laying awake at night in fear that she might be dragged out of bed. She was tired of being forced to live the perfect life. Forced to smile for her parents; the only one in her family she liked was her sister Wheezie, she’s who I wanted to protect. But she had young opinions, didn’t see what our family was capable of. And given how much risk John B went through to find me, I had to go with him. Not that I wanted to stay trapped or that I’d risk his life to save my sister. 

I felt torn with myself now. I escaped; I was on the roof; I had survived the lies, I had survived my own father aiming a gun at me; of course to his unknown knowledge Ward did exceed in his aiming and catching fire on one of us. I doubted his attention was to hurt me. Yet again it felt like a toss up considering, he did try to strangle me to death; and drugged me to get onto that stupid boat. But I knew him to know the problem wasn’t my stubbornness, it was John B and the pogues. He was threatened, and right now the Camerons wasn’t my family; it was the pogues. I had chose them a long time ago weather I wanted to admit it or not. 

Safe; is what I felt; despite the pain that was pooling on my side; the white sweater was making it difficult to hide. But I felt his kiss; the graze of his lips on my head, a tenderness of who we were. A love language for us. Seeing as JJ had followed my lead; and started down the ladder; I had stepped forward turning my back to where my hues fell on the male I loved with all my heart. Despite our differences that did come to light when I uttered the words maybe we weren’t meant to be, to work out. 

A soulfulness in my stare as I uttered my words. “ Promise you’ll come down.” I mouthed the words “ I can’t lose you.” As my palm wasn’t already filled with my own blood. Taking my hand from side, I placed them firmly on the handles of the ladder, with one step and than the next. I caught sight of the droplets of blood hitting the ladder as I climbed down, It wasn’t until I reached the bottom, I felt JJ; place his hand on my hip in order to help me off when he wore this stunned expression. “ Sarah.” He mouthed, I knew he felt it; the blood that now covered his hand; I shook my head. “ Don’t say a word.” I had strength I’d be okay until I couldn’t walk anymore; He was about to say something when I hit him in the chest. 

John B would be in earshot; I couldn’t tell him yet; once we were in the clear I’d tell him, but I didn’t want him to worry about me, not after all the risks he took to save me. Pushing myself to the side, I eyed the small area where our feet hit the grass; Kie and Pope had to make it to the gates; where it led to the waterfront it was our get away. Our only glimmer of hope.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I promise. I’ll be right behind you. [I assured Sarah as I watched JJ go down the ladder first, to ensure it was safe for Sarah to follow. Once JJ gave the “all clear” signal, I gave Sarah and nod to begin descending the ladder] You’ll be okay. JJ will meet you at the bottom, and I won’t be far behind. [I reminded her as she started to descend the ladder. I ducked down lower to the roof as I heard the sound of more gunshots looming in the air. Once Sarah was about halfway down the ladder, I started to position myself onto the ladder; getting a good grip on the sides before I slowly began descending the ladder too. It wasn’t long before I could faintly hear Sarah and JJ safely at the bottom on the ground below the ladder, and I was following them moments later. After I reached the bottom, I noticed the concerned look JJ was giving me, but assuming it had something to do with the fact that we were all still in danger on the Cameron’s grounds, I didn’t question JJ on his strange look. Instead, I snaked my arm gently and protectively around Sarah’s shoulder; gently tugging her closer to me before speaking up in a hushed volume] Okay, we made it this far, which is great, but we’re not out of danger yet. Let’s get to Pope and Kie, and then all of us get the hell out of here. [I suggested before nodding my head toward JJ; gesturing for him to lead the way. The sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better our chances would be of us surviving this]

[ofnotakook]

He’d be right behind me. It was a sense of comfort knowing I wasn’t alone.That I was nearly to safety but the question lingered of how long. Because I felt the bleeding on my hip, I felt the lost of blood that peeled from my skin. Not that Sarah was about to utter a word. If she did their plan of escaping would be jeopardized. And JJ and John B had risked it all for her. Kie and Pope were on the lower ground taking cover on her behalf. Sarah wasn’t selfish; she knew when to take one for the team. Her dad; his shots that were fired. It was venages for her; for the Pogues brainwashing her; but the truth was Sarah saw beneath the scars. She saw the truth. The perfect knit family wasn’t real. She had hoped her father would be okay; that he would let her go. Let the pogues go give John B what was rightfully his. 

But instead he saw me as property. I wasn’t a person to him. I was his daughter yes; but I also was my own mind and heard. All that to say I tried not to shake when I heard the gunshots in the distance. I had my hands holding onto the ladder as JJ slowly helped me down. Blood it was obvious at the edge of the ladder; I easily shook my head to JJ; indicating John B didn’t need to know. I was fine. I Swore I caught an edge of concern against his expression. Did JJ care? I asked myself as feet hit the pavement; the edge of the roof as we lowered ourselves down to the ground. His arm was comfort; he was there with me every step of the way. 

Reaching up with my cleared hand; I intertwined my palm with his own. Above my shoulder as I forced a smile. “ almost there.” I whispered as i felt the throbbing on my side; the dripping of redness down my leg; I just hoped it was dark enough to hide. Enough to give us a clear out before I had to say the words. I was shot; a haunting thought as I saw Kie and Pope in sight. 

“ Once we step down one last step, run to the gates, there’s a boat waiting okay. I’ll get the keys.” I told myself it was a solid plan; despite my obvious discomfort to myself. I leaned up to press a kiss to John B’s hand lips against his thumb before I gave the nod to Kie and Pope. 

It was time to run; it was our only chance; even if it meant the Pogues leaving without me; I could handle my injury and my dad; but John B needed an escape or his life was at risk; and right now I cared less about me and more about his safety. “ Run.” Whispered as hands released his own as my body heavily dropped to the ground. Shots being fired; I leaned down enough to swat; to hide under until the walkway cleared.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I gave a nod of relief to Sarah and JJ once our feet finally hit the pavement below. Sure, I knew we still had a challenge ahead of us, even more of one now that Ward knew I had taken Sarah, so I guarantee he wasn’t the only one firing a gun currently. Now we had him, and his whole damn security department firing at us, too. Regardless, we made it this far, which to some, seemed like an impossible feat in and of itself, but we’re still alive, so that’s something. I justified optimistically as Sarah told us the next part of the plan. Good thing we managed to get her out, because JJ nor I had come up with an escape plan. In normal pogue fashion, we planned to wing it once we reached the point… You know, assuming that we made it this far, I should say] Okay, babe. [I said as I heard her instruct us to “run,” and then she released my hand. Given how close I had already come to losing her, I wasn’t about to let her out of my sight; especially in a dangerous situation like this. With that protective thought in mind, I hadn’t run far before realizing she was no longer at my side, or even behind me] Sarah? Sarah, where are you? [I asked in a hushed volume as I started to back track to find her. It didn’t take me long before I nearly tripped over her as she laid down onto the ground] What are you doing? Are you okay? [Assuming maybe she tripped and hurt herself or something, which is why she didn’t get up and continue running with us. Either way, I waited for the latest bout of gun shots to fade out before I helped Sarah up from the ground. This time snaking my arm around her to keep her close as we prepared to catch up with the others] Can you walk? [Prepared to carry her on my back if she was hurt and couldn’t run. Whatever it took to get Sarah safely out of here, I was all for doing it. Sarah’s safety and freedom was my top priority right now]

[ofnotakook]

A getaway plan; honestly Sarah could easily say she had the grounds of the priority mapped out in her head. But the times she’s visited this house she could count on her hand. It was slim; but right now she had to save herself or she risked the chance of Ward getting his hooks not just in her; but it put the pogues in danger. The same people who risked their lives in order to save her. Sarah didn’t take it for granted; she knew she was a mess. She was someone who was torn between love and her family. But she was locked in her own room on more than one occasion. Her father proved he only cared about the gold. It stung; it made Sarah feel like shit; like she wasn’t enough for her own father. 

But now wasn’t the time; the end was near. She felt her knees wobbly, she felt the lost of blood elevate against her frame. Feet planted against the pavement; her eyes scanned the grounds until they reached Kie and Poper who had keys in their hands; they found the keys to the boat under one of my rocks. It was kinda my getaway car back in the day when I wanted to be reckless; I wanted an escape; apparently it was my younger self telling me to be prepared. Because right now our best bet was to run. Run through the pavements; the mountains of trees to get to the edge. I whispered the words. JJ didn’t need any admission; he ran like hell while guns were being fired. Fired at us; which is why I ducked. Not voluntarily; I had fallen to my knees. I had fell right to the ground. I felt my lungs closing off; I felt the air in my body slowly leaving, as I felt my frame hit the ground in a huff. 

I knew John B; he’d never leave without me. I was kinda surprised he hadn’t picked up on the trail of blood I left on the roof; the ladder in my wake. But to my surprise my secret was that a secret. Eyes closed growing heavy that was until I felt his hands roll onto my own palms. Fingers curled around his hands as I slowly pushed myself back onto my feet. “ I’m okay.” A fat lie I screamed at myself. The dirty blonde moved in the threes; in the brushes; her sneakers ran across the lawn until she heard her feet against the pavement. “ John B.. If I fall behind I need you to run like hell okay.” A demand not an ask. The female whispered in a low tone as fingers tighten around his palm. “ I was shot..’ The words stuck on her tongue as she paused; glancing down to her hip; her hip where there was a big ass stain of redness under her sweater; the white sweater now red; she bit down on her lip in fear; and now she’d be the reason they got caught; from running for their lives. 

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what, I would never leave Sarah behind. She was everything to me. Including my favorite pain in the ass that I argued with like we were already a married couple. Point is, I loved Sarah more than life itself, and even though things were a bit up in the open currently between us, that didn’t matter, because I would always come for her. Case and point when I saw her drop down and without a second thought or hesitation, I went back for her and then waited until she was ready to move before we continued our escape. My face turned pale though as I could feel the blood leaving my cheeks when I heard her confession about being shot] What? You were shot? [Quietly repeating the words back to myself, as if trying to process it, but also hoping that I had heard her wrong and she’d correct me now. Judging by the blood I saw that had stained her shirt, I knew I hadn’t imagined it. My worst nightmare was happening now in the fact that Sarah was hurt] It’s going to be okay. I’ll get you out of here and then we’ll get you help. [I assured her. No way in hell of knowing if she was going to be okay or not. I mean, she was shot. With a bullet. She was bleeding, and I had no way of knowing how much blood she’s lost already, because I was just now hearing she was hurt] Let’s get you on my back, and I’ll carry you out of here. [My way of letting her know that, no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her behind, so this way, if we get caught, we’re going to do so together. I silently justified as I squatted down as low as I could, so Sarah didn’t have to strain too much to shift onto my back]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s family was the why the Pogue’s were in this mess. The why we were fighting for our life’s. Namely the finger needed to be pointed towards my father. The man who wanted to be a proud family man, adoring father was willing to aim guns at his own daughter. He chose a hell of a long time ago. I wasn’t the kook anymore; I was a pogue; the family I decided I wanted. My pure love and adoration for John B. He was my everything. The boy I wanted to bicker with day and night. The boy I wanted to run on adventures with. He understood me, I never felt alone with him; I never felt like I had to pretend. I always felt trapped, the need to run from how I felt those strong feelings until I met him. Until we kissed; and fell insanely in love. 

And this island; the gold being unreachable now; was on me. I was the one who believed in my dad; kept opening my mouth and claiming he loves me, he’d never hurt me. I was the fool a disgrace not only had my brother tried to kill me drown me, my own dad wanted me dead. I had nothing but John B and the pogue’s. They were all I needed. 

Each leg of movement was starting to cause a strain on my body. I had no issues running; it was the open wound on my abdomen that was preventing me from moving fast enough. Knees weak, I could barely keep up. I heard the others in a distant reach the boat; the boat that was gassed up; the keys I knew where they were hidden the backup keys I mean. I remembered going out on this boat as a child; for our family trips on the ocean. What an embarrassing moment now considering. Leaning over my frame; eyes staring at the grass that touched my ankles. Head moving to stare between my legs in order to catch my panting breaths. I felt weak, I said the words. And I swore I heard John B stop; he paused in disbelief but the writing was pooling down my legs; the droplets of blood obvious. Tilting my head up I bit down on my lower lip to hold in the whine the pain of my wound. “ John B..” Name lingered on my tongue as tried to find the how I’d get this boy to leave without me. Instead he decided to bend down to the ground. I hesitated, I didn’t want to hold him back. “ I..” I started but I also know this boy; he’d risk it all for me. It didn’t make sense for both of us to risk being caught here, but with last minute thinking I pulled myself onto his back. Arms wrapped loosely around his neck. Legs wrapping around his waist, once I was safely on his back I rested my head on his shoulder. “ You can move now..” I echoed in a nearly teasing retort. Keep it light; until we escaped. 

A death trap of my own making.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what happened, I would never leave Sarah behind. I wasn’t stupid. I knew us breaking into her family’s compound tonight to break her out was a death trap. It was a fool’s errand, but I didn’t care. Sarah was in danger. She might not see how deranged her father and brother are, but I knew. I saw first-hand what her psychotic father was capable of, so I wouldn’t put anything past him now. Including him hurting his own daughter just to ensure he kept her far away from me. The man was a damn lunatic and the sooner I got Sarah away from him, the better off she’d be. The driving reason I broke into her room tonight. Well, “prison” was probably a more fitting word given the bars her father had put on her windows, so she could be kept there as his prisoner. Asshole. I thought in disdain as we ran toward some semblance of safety. I stopped though when I realized Sarah was no longer behind me. Panic setting in since it was dark, which made it difficult to see. Following the sounds of her breaths and rustling through the grass as I back-tracked back toward her. Shock and fear washing over me in hearing she had been shot. A part of me wondering if taking her back to her father was the best course of action, since his ties and pull could have a doctor here in moments. Still, something told me she wouldn’t want to go back there. She’d choose to take the risk to keep moving] I’ve got you. Don’t worry. I’d never leave without you, Sarah. [I assuredly whispered out as I helped her get situated safely on my back; ensuring her arms were wrapped tightly around my neck and her legs secured around my waist before I started through the trees and such in search of JJ and the others] “John B? Where the hell are you?” [I heard the familiar sound of JJ’s voice airing out nearby in a hushed tone. Moving in the direction of his voice, I eventually caught up with them. Keeping Sarah securely on my back as we reached them] “Ready for the next part of the plan? The diversion?” [JJ asked with pride in his voice, which prompted a skeptical look from me. All of us knowing JJ wasn’t the best at plans, but I did feel better when Pope and Kie chimed in to share that they had actually helped with this part of the plan] If it gets us out of here, then hell yeah, do it! [I muttered out as I watched JJ throw a lit flare in the direction of the wooded area we had all just escaped from, before throwing two others in separate directions of the same wooded area. Listening and watching as I saw a small explosion go off, followed by another, and then countless more. Pope and Kie explaining they rigged those while they were waiting for us to break Sarah out. Chuckling in pride and feeling a momentary sense of victory as I realized we temporarily stopped Ward’s guards from catching up; prompting us to continue running the remaining way off of the compounds and then into the city. Now it was just a matter of finding a place to hide out and to get Sarah medical attention] Sarah was shot, so we need to get her to a doctor before we do anything else. [I explained to the others; watching the wheels practically turning in their head on how to work this one out without all of us ending up getting caught]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s greatest fear was her friends, was the boy she loved getting hurt on her behalf. She always believed in the good in her father; that he had made mistakes. But when it came to their family he always held their best interest at heart. But all the evidence was staked against him. He faked his own death; he was okay with putting his arms around my neck. He was okay with shooting a bullet not knowing where it land. And Sarah was caught in that crossfire. She was scared that her now slow pace would hurt the pogues in the end. Her new Family. And she knew better than to fight with John B, than to plead with him to keep going without her. He’d never leave her behind. He was noble, he was the man that loved her more than his own life. 

And she’d risk it all for him too. He was the light in her new darkness. Sarah tried to hide it; the trail of blood she now kept behind her. She held the wound to her hip as tightly as she could; until she fell. She fell forward breathing heavily feeling the impact of loss blood. She was trying to move forward in the deep grass; but her feet stopped. She had hoped the male had moved far enough forward to forget; about her. But his voice was like a compass calling her home. And she had to smile to herself as she pulled herself onto his back. Bitting down on her lip knowing she was in pain; that pain in her side, the pool of blood that was now hitting his shirt. Head slowly came to rest on his shoulder; weakness inside of her. “ I know..” She whispered in a weakened tone. She held on for dear life; she had her arms wrapped around his neck, and her legs slid around his waist; a sense of safety; as we neared the spot where the others were. 

The night was dark; no one noticed her pale face; the weaken state she was in. Another phase to the plan? Her eyes trailed over to the smirks of her friends; the explosions that they had in fact thrown in the direction of each guard growing on their tails. A small smirk tugged at her lips. Severs Ward right, to come for family; and you get burned. The others glanced at her; as the elephant in the room was exposed. She was shot; weak; blood pooling out of her as she spoke. “ I’m fine.” She said as she rested her head back down on his shoulder. She vaguely heard JJ make a plan. “ We run into town. There’s abandoned buildings, maybe we find a doctor office on our way.” It wasn’t settle or optimistic in any form; but maybe if we found supplies; I could stitch up my own wound. I had no desire to see a doctor again; nor could we trust any person wouldn’t go running to Ward. So I had barely said a word; leaving the decision up to John B; he was the fighter; the leader in this mess. I’d trust him; I’d follow him anywhere.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I nodded in response to JJ’s suggestion. No offense to my best friend, or anything, but when he came up with plans, they usually crashed and burned. Then again, his idea to break Sarah out wasn’t his worst plan. Mind you, she did get shot as a result of the escape, but I don’t know if I can necessarily blame JJ’s plan for that, or just pin the blame on Ward for being a deranged and psychotic piece of shit] I think heading toward the town is a good idea, but Sarah definitely needs a doctor. Kai, you still have the fake IDs we had made up for all of us, right? [Kai nodded in response while flashing me a confused look] Okay, so if we go to a doctor’s office or hospital, we can use the fake IDs, so Sarah’s identity doesn’t get back to her father. Either way, we need to get the bullet out of Sarah, and get her stitched up. That’s our first priority once we get off of this property. [I explained. Knowing Sarah was getting weaker from the blood loss, so the sooner we got her gunshot wound tended to, the more at ease I would feel that she’s going to be okay. Honestly, at this point in time, my only concern was Sarah. I kept that thought to myself though, because I knew if I startled to unravel with worry, everyone else would begin unraveling too. Bottom line, we weren’t going to make it out of this situation alive if we didn’t remain level headed and make the right decisions]

[ofnotakook]

Right decisions; was it ever in our nature? To be smart, to not lead on impulse? In the short time Sarah spend with John B and the pogues, she’s learned JJ and John B tended to make decisions on a whim. They tended to come up with a plan and without thinking ran with it. Granted it Sarah owed her life to the poges, she owed the idea that she was released from the bars of her own bedroom due to them. And she appreciated the fact given the limbo state the male and myself were tethered into that they risked it all for me. The wrath from my dad; the Camerons’s who I was learning spelled terrible news. Sarah always believed in her dad; the type of man he was. He was kind, he cared about his family wanted to provide for us. But the money the power it gave a person it tended to steamroll you into a horrible person. Sarah couldn’t believe her eyes; the lengths her dad was willing to go, harming his own daughter, embedding Rafe despite his own crimes. She felt disgusted with her own family. The blonde knew where she belonged; where her heart was. Holding onto dear life to the man she currently had her arms wrapped around. 

The blonde let nimble fingers graze over the thin layer of his shirt; the weak grip she held. Her wound was obvious, the blood pooling down her leg. Ward got her damn good. And Sarah hated her fate was on the edge of a line. Doctors wasn’t an option, she knew this island. She knew Ward was probably on a warpath now for blood. Pogues won by letting my escape happen, and now he’d be paying off any source he could, to get his hands on me. 

The female listened despite her own body was fading, head rested upon his head; the comfort of his scent, she was always safe with him. Eyes blinked open and closed, and she slowly let her weaken vision take in the pogue’s who glanced in every direction Smoke of the explosion was all in the air, intoxicating. “ Go South, we get on the boat, and port half way down the island, there’s a hidden office, our best bets is escaping this house.” A thought for food; a hidden doctors office; one that may get me home sailing. 

Without the risk of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised that, in spite of her condition, Sarah was the one to air out the best and most sensible plan. Giving a nod in response as I looked toward JJ and the others] You heard her. Head south. [I said in agreement as I continued carrying Sarah on my back as we all made route south toward the docks. Knowing our risk was still higher than not of getting caught, but she was right… If we had a chance of getting out of here and to freedom, this was the one with the best odds. More than anything though, I just wanted to get her somewhere safe, so she could get some medical attention. I could hear by how weak her voice was that she was losing a lot of blood. The longer this continues, the worse her chances of survival were. Once we reached the docks, we ducked into the shadows until reaching the boat. I made sure to get Sarah on safely, and then I laid her down across one of the seats to rest, while I helped JJ and Pope to untie the ropes; all the while Kai started up the boat. Knowing we’d all need to work together, and to do so quickly, or else we weren’t getting out of here alive] Okay, Kai, we’re clear. Get us the hell out of here. [I called out to her as me and the other guys pushed the boat away from the dock to give it an oomph and then once the boat was cleared from the sides, I returned to Sarah] How bad is it? [I asked as I grabbed the first aid kit stowed under the one seat. Not that I could do much with my incredibly limited experience and knowledge, but I felt helpless by not doing what I could for her now. Besides, if I could at least slow the bleeding, that would give her the best fighting chance to stay alive until we were able to get her medical attention]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt like she had lost everything. She used to be the girl who would always go to the beck and call of her dad; he used to be the incredible man she grew up with. He used to be the man who read bedtime stories to her. He used to give her a glass of milk each time. She had so many fond memories of him. But now; it felt like those memories were tainted. Sarah had always believed in him, she fought the urges to go against him. Seeing his boat explode it destroyed her; she broke up with John B the man she loved for him, because he was glad the man who took his father away got justice. Was dead. And suddenly it felt like our love wasn’t meant to be. 

And now Sarah was bleeding out because of the man who was supposed to protect her. He shot fire at her; at her friends not caring of the consequences. That was the sadness of the reality. That I was alone. I couldn’t turn to my sister, I couldn’t protect. I had to put myself first, and that was the pogues my made family. We lift each other up, we go to bat for each other. And I knew the high stakes. I knew what my father was capable of. I had to wonder how I had any ounce of love for him after what he’s done. Lying to protect Rafe, letting my brother get away with attempting to drown me, he let me get drugged. He’d rather put harm to me than take accountability. And I had to swallow that truth. With a heavy head I felt like my vision was becoming blur as I spurred the last task at hand. Hands loosen on the grip against John B’s shirt, as my eyes drifted shut. How long had we walked? Before I heard the rustling of feet hitting the docks. And I felt my body being dropped gently into the boat, back pressed against a hard backing on the edge. Slowly eyes lifted seeing blurs. 

Figures moving left and right; the “ Ropes done.” I heard from JJ as both boys plopped themselves down on the boat. Pope was at the wheel with Kie, I heard the soft whispers of nothingness. And I heard his voice, the one that always dragged me home. And I wanted to be honest, as my hand slowly nimbly moved against the dam fabric of my sweater as I lifted it up. And I saw it the blood, it was dark, and it explained why I felt faint. Turning my eyes to the man I loved; John B was preparing to bandage up the wound for a short time. “ It doesn’t look pretty, I’ll have a nasty scar if anything.” I aired out attempting to lighten the mood as I felt the boat move as if it was full of lighten. 

This remembered me of when I saved his ass, when we first started out; on our little adventure. A shy grin turned against my lips as I spoke. “ Last time one of us had to bandage the other up, I was sneaking you into the house, I saved your ass, are we finally repaying the favor?” I asked with a sense of teasing in my voice. Definitely not the time, but I needed a laugh a small brief moment for just us.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Although I knew now wasn’t the time for jokes and quips, I still appreciated the fact that Sarah was trying to keep the mood light between us. Maybe if the circumstances had been reversed, I would have been all for cracking jokes… Hell, I would more than likely be cracking them too. Given that Sarah had been shot and was rapidly losing blood though, I definitely wasn’t in a fun and games kind of mindset. For her sake though, I did flash her a grin as I leaned down to press a tender kiss to her forehead] Well, I figured I owed you so it was high time I stepped up and returned the favor. Maybe next time you want me to save you though, let’s go with something that involves less blood shed and need for panic… Deal? [Giving it my best effort to joke in return. In the meantime I grabbed the first aid kit. My hand shaking slightly as I quickly fished around for some bandaging and things I thought I could use to stop the bleeding] Either way, I’m putting you in charge of keeping an eye on me to make sure I’m doing this right. I mean, doctor stuff is new territory for me so I’ll need the supervision. All that to say, eyes open at all times, okay? [My casual way of requesting to Sarah that I wanted her to keep her eyes open. Afraid that if she closed them and fell asleep, I might lose her. A thought that I couldn’t bear to consider as I started to do what I could to apply pressure to her wound and then applied some gauze and then bandaging too, all in an effort to stop the significant bleeding she was currently experiencing]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was well aware of the bleeding that now wasn’t the time for her humor, for her need to crack a joke open. But Sarah could see how scared he was; it was in his eyes. She was scared herself that she was about to take her last breath, by the hands of her own father. Ward had no idea she was assuming that he had aimed for her; she had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. Her own father pulled the trigger; he was aiming a weapon at her friends, at the man she loved. And now she was facing deaths door; she remembered the last time. 

John B was the one aching in pain as she ran her fingers with a cold rag over his blooded wound; which is why the dirty blonde showed amusement. Or she was going nuts with the lack of blood in her system. Eyes had slowed movement as he spoke; and she knew this was his way of saying “ Stop Sarah.” As if she planned on taking a bullet tonight. But her smile soften knowing feeling the panic under his tone, and her slimmed hand; her hand reached to touch his arm as a soothing of reassurance that she was okay. “ I promise next time, I’ll tell my dad not to shoot.” She echoed with that sarcastic retort of hers. But Sarah was done with the jokes. Not that she had the energy. She felt like her body was giving out; she felt the color had now drained from her face in the dark. She barely felt the boat moving against the water; the ocean seas; the seas that used to bring soothing. That used to make her feel safe; and now she was trembling, she felt his hand on her wound; and she had glanced down the blood was soaking her skin, right through his hand. “ Use the guse to wipe around the wound, and then bandage it gently at least until we arrive.” To a doctor; assuming we had the money to get me treated; or this was the end. Her eyes landed back on his features, and she uttered an “ I love you.” As if it was the last words she’d say. 

Eyes kept fluttering open and shut in a daze, despite the promise to stay with him, to guide him through the process; she hardly felt her hand move down to her side; as if her limbs were jelly now. If only this boat would move any faster..

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I appreciated Sarah’s attempt to crack jokes now. That was kinda our thing, you could say, but at the moment, I felt far from laughing. I was worried and growing even more so with every passing second. Sarah was shot. She was bleeding out currently, and I had no way of knowing if we’d get her medical attention in time to save her] Speed up the boat! Let’s go! [I yelled out to Pope and Kie as I saw Sarah’s eyes close. Judging by the worried look on JJ’s face, I knew he was thinking the same thing I was] Hurry the hell up, JJ, and help me pack her wound. Quick, get those gauze pads from the bag! [My voice shaking in building worry as JJ did as I ordered; grabbing me what I needed as I tossed the now soiled and blood soaked gauze pads to the side as I took the clean ones from JJ’s grasp. My hand shaking as I pressed it against Sarah’s gunshot wound. After what felt like a damn eternity, the boat pulled to a stop. I didn’t exactly know where we were at the moment, but at this point Pope and Kie were tying off the boat to the pier, so it wouldn’t go anywhere, and then they rushed toward us] “Come on. I got word that there’s a surgeon in town who handles cases like this for the right price.” [Pope explained which prompted my brows to furrow in confusion] “Get Sarah, let’s go.” [Kie instructed, which prompted me to tape off the currently gauzed padding I had in place, then JJ helped me to lift Sarah carefully out of the boat and onto the pier. Once JJ and I were on the pier, I cradled Sarah securely in my arms] “Here, take this bag. It should be enough to get her treated. Pope and I will stay with the boat.” [Kie said as JJ grabbed the bag and the address of the warehouse doctor, and then we rushed through the dark night air toward the provided address. A less than ideal situation from all angles given Sarah’s condition and the fact that we were in an unfamiliar place looking for the location of a doctor that we knew nothing about. Talk about a wild card move, at its best] Stay with me, Sarah. We’re going to get you help. Keep fighting. [I called out to her as JJ barked out instructions and I merely kept up with his pace as I carried Sarah in my arms toward our destination]

[ofnotakook]

A scar that might kill me. 

It was a thought for Sarah; she felt like she’d been through the ringer. Her own family was willing to sacrifice her for their own benefits. Sarah once thought the world of her father; of the family. But now she knew the truth they only craved the wealth they’d stomp on anyone who dared to stand in their way. Sarah’s own brother tried to drown her, and now her father was the one who pulled the trigger. Obviously he was aiming for John B, but Sarah knew she’d always end up in the cross fire. 

Not that she cared, she’d rather die than live without him. The words she said that night; on the smaller boat, as John B fought for his life, to escape the death sentence. And I meant it; I loved John B and yeah we fought; we ended up screaming at each other. But i’d do anything to be with him, and now as I was fighting for my own life; I only hoped the pogues survived. Sarah was falling unconscious, she had felt her body shutting off. The last words she spoke were of love, an undenying world of love for him. But she felt the blood lost. She felt her wounds becoming fetel. And she heard the urgent, the eagerness in her man’s voice as she felt the vague packing of her wound. How long had it been? 

She had no idea, because she felt darkness overcome her. She felt like she was falling into limo. She barely felt John B and JJ as they wrapped her sim arms around their shoulders and held her up. Enough to look like Sarah was walking, but she was dragged towards the clinic, and she barely heard the exchange when the surgeon called the three up. And with each step, she felt a slight ache in her body. An ache she wanted to subside. But Sarach knew she had to fight; to live, to open her eyes again. She felt her frame fall to a bedding; as her head hung down as the surgeon whispered. “ It’ll be okay, fight.” And She fel the breathing tube come to her nose, she felt the bleeding that was exposed. The doctor mumbled a few words to her friends. “ Do you have the money? She may not live.” He uttered and I felt my body weak. My own shadow breathing as my eyes slowly woke, for a second to see the unfamiliar surroundings, the walls brown. The tubes connected to me, I was scared. But I couldn’t move before my eyes went shut all over again. 

The doctor took the money and he soon took a tool; to save me, if it did any good, because right now I felt like I was on the brink of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

“Yeah, man. Here.” [JJ aired out in response to the shifty doctor’s request for money, before handing him a bag with money in it. My eyes shifted into a roll watching the doctor count it. So much for a moral code to save a life. Apparently all this asshole cared about what money] Just save her. Please. [I aired out pleadingly as I held Sarah’s hand with my one hand; all the while gently stroking back the hair from her face with my free hand. After a moment or so the doctor seemed satisfied with the amount of money JJ gave him inside that bag, and then he began. Watching as he first put Sarah under with what I assumed to be some kind of anesthesia before he grabbed a questionable looking scalpel so he could begin making the first cut. I knew in my gut that trusting this doctor might be the worst idea we’ve ever had, but at the same point, our hands were tied. It was either this option or we’d lose Sarah. Sure, his “she may not live” statement didn’t leave me with much confidence in his skills, but I had to believe in Sarah now. Sarah was strong. She was brave. If anyone could fight this, it was her] Come on, baby. Fight this. Don’t you dare leave me. Fight, baby. Fight. [I gently pleaded in her ear before pressing a tender kiss to her forehead] “Keep watch.” [I heard the doctor instruct of JJ before giving me a knowing sort of look and then a nod] “Here we go.” [The doctor said in less than a confident tone as he made the first cut; taking the scalpel across Sarah’s skin in order to remove the bullet from her body. It was excruciating to watch, but I promised myself that no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her side] “Grab those gauze pads and some gloves. Pour some of that vial with sanitizing solution directly over the incision spot and then place the gauze pads firmly across the area to slow her bleeding. We don’t want her losing more blood than she already has.” [The doctor instructed; forcing me to release Sarah’s hand, so I could assist in the surgery. After what felt like an eternity, he finished; managing to remove the bullet and then to seemingly successfully repair damage to her wounded organ internally. Once he finished, he stitched her up then covered the wound with a significant amount of gauze pads and medical tape] “It’s a wait and see, at this point, so let’s hope she’s a fighter.” [The doctor said while washing his hands in the sink in the corner of the room] She is. [I flatly said in response before removing my gloves and washing my own hands once the doctor had finished. After ensuring my hands were clean, I returned to the table where Sarah rested and I took her hand in my own] You’re a fighter, Sarah. The strongest person I know, so fight this. I’m not going anywhere. [I had no way of knowing if she could hear me, but I didn’t care. On the off chance that she could, I was going to remind her of her strength and ability to fight this now]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt the screams into darkness. She felt like she was on a cloud in limo. She had no control of her body; she felt like she was paralyzed. She didn’t have the power to move, she barely felt her body being held up. She didn’t want to die, she didn’t want to be traped in her own bedroom. She never asked her own father to shoot bullets at her and her friends. Sarah suddenly felt like her once simply life was a cycle of nightmares. Death on our door steps, the rush of running; being on the med. Sarah knew her getting shot was her fault. If she had just listened to John B weeks ago; that Ward didn’t have my best interest at heart. 

If I had stayed with Pogues instead of trusting my now psychic family. One trying to kill me left and right. Sarah had learned her lesson, the only people she could count on was herself, the pogues, even her sister she just hoped her sister was okay. She knew she was stipid to be thinking about anyone but herself now. But she held sympathy for others. The aching in her body was enough to force her to scream in pain if she wasn’t knocked out. She vaguely heard the way her body gently was placed down on a mental table.  I vaguely felt John B his breath in my ear as he tried to reassure me I was okay, I was a fighter. I was in my own little bubble. The darkness in my lids, the way my body was lifeless, especially as the doctor did insert his tool into my body, if I was awake I’d be screaming. I barely felt it; probably from the anesthesia. I couldn’t move, I had no idea how long I was out. I could vaguely hear the voices as the doctor echoed out it would be touch and go. Would I be surviving? Was I still bleeding out? Sarah felt the stirs in her mind as she laid still. Baby, fight.. Words echoed in my ears. 

John B, he needed me, he needed me to be strong, to fight through the blood lost. I couldn’t let him down. I was groggy when I suddenly felt the strength to open my eyes. The small light above me it flashed my eyes forcing me to squit, and I felt John B’s head on my stomach, not on the wounded skin, but right under. I was aching as I let out a soft wine. My hand pale as I lowered my hand onto his dirty brown locks, fingers slowly combed through his hair. “ John B.” I echoed in a whisper; I couldn’t speak and I noticed JJ was sitting in the chair, eyes closed, even JJ stayed. A made family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Hours passed by and there was no change. Sarah was so still and I had no way of knowing if she’d ever wake up. The doctor didn’t sound hopeful. Made a snide remark about her chances of pulled through as he greedily took our money and then ran like hell like some kind of coward. Clearly it was all about money for him. As more time passed, I found my head resting against Sarah’s side. Near her incision but not close enough to cause any further damage. I just wanted and needed to be close to her now. JJ wasn’t far away. He took a look out to make sure Ward nor any of his men were nearby before he’d return to the private room here and take a seat in the chair adjacent from where Sarah and I rested now. I didn’t know how much more time had passed… Felt like an eternity even though I knew it was probably just a few more hours, but eventually I heard the faint sound of her voice, as well as felt her fingers rustle gingerly through my hair. At that my head immediately shot up and I looked at her. Relief flooding my face and expression currently] You’re awake! Thank God! [I uttered out in evident relief as I pressed a gentle kiss to the back of her hand] How are you feeling? The black market doctor left a few things for pain if you need it. [The guy wasn’t exactly reliable but he did seem to save Sarah’s life, so at the moment, I was thinking a bit more favorably of him. Maybe he wasn’t a total money-hungry quack after all. Jury was still out on that one though] Do you want some water? [I asked as I had already picked up a fresh bottle of water; prepared to give her some if she was thirsty]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt weak, she ha no idea as to how long she’d been laying her. The memory of her father; of how easily he had aimed a gun at her, at her friends because of what? Jealousy? Because he wanted to hold this wild control over her? Sarah had once desired to please her family. She had once idolize her father the memory of us at the docks when I was only a little girl it clouded who I knew he was. 

But a few hours before he was so willing to throw me under the bus. He was so willing to let me bleed out on our yard. Because of his hate for the Pogues. I was hurt, I was feeling betrayed but at the same time, relieved as I felt my body come to life. I felt my eyes lift open as I adjusted to the dim light. I saw JJ in the corner as my eyes peeled over to John B who had his head rested against my palm. And I knew I was lucky, he was here. He loved me, and I had to let my fingers run soothingly through his dirty blonde locks. A small smile peeled at my lips. And I knew I couldn’t move. I felt numb to my core as my body was now healing from the blood lost, Sarah wasn’t going to jump up, the fear of Ward on our tail was aching against my own skin. The blonde had peered up at him; the man she loved so much. 

“ I’m okay.” As okay as I was going to be. The wound had been deep, the stitched up wound was felt as my eyes slowly moved to the man I loved. My hand moved to reach for John B. And I felt a sigh of relief escape my own lips. And I felt my gaze linger on him. “ I’m sorry, I’m sorry my dad is a crazy,” My words could never compare to the pain my family has caused him, the pogues and I wanted to do my part to mend those fences. “ Yes.” I echoed to the option of water my throat felt dry but I wasn’t going to jump forward, I slowly lifted my head up to get to a sitting position. My free hand had moved to my side, knowing the pain; the wound my own family caused.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I felt mounds of relief when I heard Sarah’s voice. She was alive. She was awake, and she was speaking. Lifting her hand to my lips as I pressed a couple of kisses to the back of her hand, then gently lowered her hand back down onto the metal table she was lying on] Hey, don’t apologize. It’s not your fault. All that matters is keeping you safe and away from your deranged family. [No matter what, I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t let Ward harm Sarah again. I thought to myself as I brought a fresh bottle of water to Sarah’s lips, so she could drink as much as she wanted and needed. I knew she needed time to rest and heal, but the sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better I could guarantee her safety from her family. One could hope, at least. I mean the way Ward operated, and the fact that he knew people all over the world, I wasn’t sure exactly how far remote we would need to go, and for how long either for that matter, in order to keep Sarah safe, but no matter what, I’d do what it takes. I came close to losing Sarah this time… Too close for comfort, so I wasn’t willing to take any chances with her safety again. At least not until Ward was no longer a threat to her] Once you’re well enough, we’re going to get you out of here. Pope and Kie are keeping an eye on the boat, and when you’re strong enough, we’re all getting on that boat, and getting as far away as possible. We figure with some distance and preferably some place off the grid, eventually your father will stop looking for you. [Maybe wishful thinking since Ward wasn’t one who took well to losing, but one could hope he’d eventually give up and accept that Sarah was gone]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah kept asking herself the obvious how she’d been blind. How she was capable of still holding a torch of love for her family. With all the crimes all the ways her own brother tried to murder her; sending drug mules her way, being the one that nearly drowned her to death. And now her own father; was so mad at the Pogues so terrified of losing his daughter to the pogues; not wanting to lose the fight that he aimed and shot me. The blood that once covered her fingertips, the blood the redness that ran over her sweater, it was an image Sarah couldn’t erase.  

Her friends, her boyfriend? Cut into the crossfires because of her fucked up  family. And even now as she opened her eyes; said a few words, she felt the aching on her wound, damn that stitch is gonna hurt like hell. But it was comforting to feel his touch, to witness his lips touching her knuckles once again. John B, he was her anchor that kept her whole. A soften expression; a smile curled at the corners of her lips as she saviored his touch; his lips against her skin. “  They drugged me, they forced me here. I feel trapped like no one is safe in that house, but my sister..”  A fear for the little Cameron it rocked me whole now, as I felt the lump forming in my throat. Wheezie she was innocent had no idea who’s roof she was living under. Like myself; I’d been blinded from the truth. But now my father was deranged; he passed off onto Rafe; and Rose was clueless as ever a pond in the game; until she crossed Ward. 

A slight cough was heard; as the blonde felt the wetness hit her tongue, one sip of water turned into half the bottle until she released the top from her lips and she slowly sat herself up, her palms hitting the metal of the table to hold herself up. Nuts insane considering her own wounds she wore. But her eyes ran along John B’s features with ease. “ You know he won’t let that happen. He blames you the pogues for his princess no longer being in his care. I’m a game for him to win..” A sad truth, an ached formed in her chest now.  “ I wouldn’t blame you if you allowed the pogues to leave me here for  dust to get away. I don’t want to bring you down, or put you and pogues in danger..” Not again the words hid  at the tips of her tongue. 

Danger; our names, but Ward he’d kill to end the war..I was terrified the lengths he’d go no matter how safe I felt with John B; he’d get hurt because of me. A pill I needed to swallow now.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, that would never happen. [I flatly replied with a matter of fact sort of shrug. Sure, I knew if this was just about Sarah, maybe JJ and the others would have high-tailed it out of here. Not necessarily Pope since he had a heart to do the right thing, but Kie was what you could say, hot and cold toward Sarah, so it wouldn’t take much for her to bail on Sarah. And well, JJ hated Kooks in general, so he had no loyalties to Sarah either. Thing was though, they all knew I’d literally die to protect Sarah, and the Pogues would always put their lives on the line to protect each other. All that to say, as long as I was staying put at Sarah’s side, the Pogues wouldn’t be going anywhere either because they’d always have my back, just like I’d always have theirs too. We fought fiercely for each other] Even if the others decided to high-tail it out of here, I’d never leave your side. Unless you tell me to go, I’m not going anywhere… [I started to say before an amused smirk followed] And even then, I can’t promise I’d actually leave. You know I’m stubborn when people try to tell me what to do. [I teased even though that was the truth] Either way, once you’re well enough, we’re all getting the hell out of here, and getting to safety together. Until then, just rest and heal. [I said as I gave her hand another gentle squeeze. My way of reassuring her that we were all in this together; no matter what the outcome]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah knew her choices  as of late not only disappointed herself but those around her. Sarah never wanted the wealth, she never wanted to be accepted as the princess Kook. That title had been given to her. People made assumptions about her; her personality; how she followed the kook business, and yes once upon a time she was a kook. Bu from that one day running around with John B at chapel Hill, helping him seek answers to a quest she had no idea how over our heads we were. We were just kids running around aimlessly. But I saw that treasure hunting look in his eyes; the way his eyes lit up at a map, and I mused, I admired who John B. And he made me want more for myself. 

One day; one rain kiss on the docks was all it took for the dirty blonde to feel hooked. He’s who she loved, and even with death upon us; my dad probably having a search squad on our heads. I had let the pogues down; when I had let John B go, I was angry, I was sad when I thought my dad died, and john B was just so glad to see him fall through the cracks. My dad was money hungry, he was awful he killed, he allowed Rafe to get away with Murder, but he was my dad; but now as I groggily came out of my unconscious state; I remembered the cage I felt locked in. I recalled his aim, the gun shot wound that should’ve killed me. My own father aimed the trigger, and right now Sarah knew in her gut she was a pogue, and she appreciated the friendships she made. Eyes glanced over for comfort to the boy that made her heart race. And her pinky found his; a trace of her finger against his own. 

“ I made that mistake once, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for letting you go John B, I was..” Pausing briefly before a sigh could be heard escaping her lips. “ I was hurting, I didn’t want to believe my dad was this monster. I know you said you’ve always got me, but I wouldn’t blame you if you decided no one chances.” Chances to love me, to be together after this horror war my dad had, all the times guns aimed at us because of him, a war he wanted to win on behalf of me. One he already lost. 

Because my heart; who I was, it was a pogue; my known family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I get it, Sarah. Before I came into your life and opened your eyes to who your dad and brother really are, you had a really tight bond with your dad. Naturally you’d want to fight to protect his reputation. It only makes sense that you wouldn’t want to believe your dad was capable of something like that. If the situation was reversed, and it was me in your shoes, I probably would have done the same thing as you. [I admitted honestly. It was the truth. If this was my dad, I would have fought to protect his reputation too. It’s what you do for the people you love. I’d do it for Sarah and the pogues too because I consider them my family. No matter what, I’d always have their backs, just like I know the pogues would have mine] You’ll never run out of chances with me, Sarah. I hate to break it to you, but I love you, so until you say otherwise, you’re stuck with me. [As much truth as there was in my words, I aired out that honesty with a joking tone] Anyway, for now, we just need to get your strong enough that we can move somewhere safer for the duration of your recovery. [I knew where we were would suffice for now, but it would only be a matter of time before Sarah’s dad figures out we’re hiding out here currently. We’d cross that bridge if and when the time comes. For now I wanted Sarah to get a little stronger and heal up a bit before we decide to move her]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah had always been privileged growing up. She knew of the different layers of the island. She never wanted to believe in herself to judge others; the living, how some had to work harder than others. But Sarah was guilty to pulling away when it felt messy and difficult. When someone got too close to her; she was the one guilty of running. The fear of being seen truly. It’s what happened with her friendship with Kie, and it was easy to blame the split on how John B reacted to her father’s then death. But the truth was Sarah was scared. 

Scared of letting go of the shielded life she lived, the ground beneath her gone. Her family shattered into pieces. Her dad wasn’t the man she once admired. He was a monster; he felt threatened he knew I wasn’t under the spell, and he tried to hurt me. My own brother tried to kill me, did I feel safe with my family? No I was shot because of my dad, and now I felt the numbness against my skin. The numbness that tingled the layer of my stomach; where the scars stood. I wouldn’t blame John B if he wanted to cut loses here, and leave me stranded. But I knew him his heart; the good boy inside of him; the boy I loved with every fiber inside of me. “ It’s not about him anymore. I knew who he was; he wasn’t the dad I once laughed with on the beach when I was a little girl, he knew he lied, he knew what he did, and my brother is protecting him. I’m sorry for the pain my family caused you.” The pogues hanging onto my lips. 

Hearing the words; unlimited chances hung in the air. I love you; and I loved him, I wouldn’t let the male get away from me again. Sarah tried her best to master the pain, the smile heated against brims as her hand grasped hold of his fingers. “ I love you.” words spoken as the blonde attempted to sit up using the strength of her elbows to hold her upper frame upright. But she knew staying put wasn’t an option; Ward had his minions surroundings areas; I would gasp through the pain than get caught. An intense stare hinted into my features as I spoke. “ John B.. we have to move. I can handle the pain. This island isn’t safe not with my dad, he has people..” And I knew Ward; he wanted power; to hold an angle, and us staying still didn’t feel safe; for me or the pogues.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I knew Sara was right… We had to move sooner rather than later. We were basically sitting ducks here. Ward had this whole island in his pocket, so it would only be a matter of time before he got wind of the fact that we were here. I’ll be damned if I did all this work to break Sara out of there… And then to get her the help she needed after she got shot, just for that deranged idiot to take her back to the prison he had her encamped in] Okay, if you’re sure you can handle it, we’ll move. [Worried if she busts a stitch she may bleed out though] We need to take it slow though. Be smart about this. We can’t afford you busting any stitches. If you bleed out… [I trailed off. Not even able to finish off the thought of that possibility] Let me tell JJ we’re going to move. [I said as I pressed a kiss to Sara’s forehead; letting my lips linger there for a second or two before I broke away. It was almost like I didn’t want to let her out of my sight; fearful I’d lose her] Be right back. [I promised as I briefly and reluctantly left the table she was resting on in order to find JJ, who was keeping watch just outside] We’re moving. We need to get off of this island. Alert the others. [JJ agreed; immediately pulling out his phone to message the others to get the boat ready for our momentary departure. In seeing JJ got the ball rolling on that, I returned to Sara. Preparing to move her once she gave me the okay. I still felt unsettled about us leaving, but at least night had set in, so that would give us the advantage as we used the darkness, shadows, and any alleyways we could find to our advantage] Just tell me when, and I’ll help you off the table.

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was embarrassed of who her family was now. It used to be a loving home, used to be a place of safety. The countless family dinners outside on the docks by the grills. The countless boat rides we had. The loving embraces from her dad; he used to be a home for her. And now when she thought about Ward all she felt was anger, betrayal. Someone who only cared about greed, he went out of his way to coverup a death, to frame John B, and now he even if it was an accident he shot me. I was stitched up because of him. All that to say; I didn’t want to be stuck on this island for one more minute. I was on edge, my hand touching the bandaged wound, as I felt the pain. We’re sitting ducks; Ward had his minions all over the island; it was possible he’d be hunting me down. This was a lowkey office; and I doubted this bystander of a doctor was on the payroll. 

I was aching, I didn’t want the drugs, but I also had to put the pogues first; John B first. They came to Nassau for her, Sarah didn’t care if she was limbing in pain whimpering as she sped up to walk as long as we ended up on that boat and made our way back to OBX a home, a new safety. We’d find a way to the gold; our rightful place of earnings. Sarah could see the concern written on John B’s face now, but she was okay. A smile of reassurance coming from her now. She laid kept on the metal table now, as she nodded, biting down on her lower lip to hold out on any pain. “ I promise, slow and steady wins the race.” I added with a joke, Sarah found her more humours side with him. The touch of his lips on her forehead, it made her insides turn, the butterflies now. Sarah had waited until John B had stepped outside to inform JJ before she was able to slowly sit back up. Damn the shooting pain that ran up her side. Deep breaths, Sarah was about to move to step down from the table when she heard her boyfriend, A soft brave smile came to her lips. Reaching out her hand to grasp hold of his arm for support. “ We need to move. I’m ready.” Her stitching may not be; but I could rest once we got safety; but until the docks came into view the dirty blonde wouldn’t feel at ease. 

An unsettling feeling at the pit of her stomach.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised the second I offered my help to Sarah once she was ready, she didn’t hesitate to take my hand. Anybody else would be feeling sorry for themselves and their situation, but not Sarah. She was a total bad ass. By far, the bravest person I knew. Thing was though, I hated moving her. She nearly bled out and died after being shot. Her stitches were the only thing keeping her from doing so now, so what she needed more than anything was to rest and heal. Problem was, her deranged father and his entourage of employees that would be on the look out for us. I didn’t like having to move her from here, but it was either this, or get caught by her father’s people. Neither outcome was ideal, which was why I left the final choice up to Sarah. Her answer clear as day when she held out her hand and took a hold of my arm for support] I can carry you. I’ll do the whole slow and steady thing… Taking your word on the winning the race part you joked about. [Flashing her an amused grin. Knowing now wasn’t the time for fun and jokes, but maybe we both needed a little light humor given the shitty circumstances we were facing. I silently told myself as I helped her off the metal table she was lying across and then kept a secure hold on her until she was steady on her feet] You good? [Needing to know she was okay before I made any further movements or plans]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah should’ve been more hesitant to move. Given the amount of stitches her body had to have, the amount of blood she had lost from that gunshot. The one that came from her father. Sarah if she had too much time to dwell on it would start feeling useless a burden to her own family. Because one her dad was willing to lie for Rafe, yet the innocent child like myself was left to scrape by. Pick a side, and my heart was with the pogues, with John B. And my brother was a bit deranged now, but I suppose father like son, Rafe had to get that attitude from somewhere didn’t he? 

I fought the urge to roll my eyes now. As I found that strength to lift my body up to sit and reach my feet the white tennis shoes to the ground. And I did and felt that aching pain on my lower abdomen. Where the stitches were, and as John B came to view I wore a gentle smile as I reached to brace myself for the pain as I put the weight on my feet. Fingers wrapping around his forearm you felt his muscles now as I found my courage to fully stand. “ I don’t want to make it harder for you to run, I’ll try to keep up.” A promise to my heart, but if John B and the others got hung up because of me I’d never forgive myself. The pogues were in a tough spot because of me. And I hated it, I’d rather bleed out on that table than for them to get caught. All that to say, my hand slid into his bigger palm with a squeeze. “ I’m ready, let’s meet the others.” Conviction in my tone as with an easy step started towards the exit doors; to leave, before my dad found us, before we felt in hot waters.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, I don’t want to run the risk of you popping one of your stitches and bleeding out, so we’ll take it slow and steady. Hell, if we have to crawl there to keep your safe, then so be it. [Mind you I didn’t expect either of us to crawl, obviously, but I was just trying to prove a point now. No matter what risk came to me, Sarah’s safety and well-being would always be my top focus. I silently thought to myself as I gave her hand a gentle squeeze] I’m good carrying you if that will be easier and less painful than you having to walk. [Fortunately the pier wasn’t far from here, but the problem was, we couldn’t exactly walk right down main street to get there since Sarah’s father, no doubt, had people out there looking for us. Nah, we needed to take the most discreet way possible in order to keep ourselves from getting noticed before we reach the boat that would hopefully get us the hell out of there] JJ’s right outside waiting for us… He’s already figured out a plan with the best route we should take to get to the pier where the boat’s waiting for us. [I explained as I securely and protectively held her close to me as she got on her feet; giving her a nod in reply as she gave the “okay” that she was ready] Walking or do you want me to carry you? [Knowing Sarah had an independent side to her so I figured I’d leave the decision up to her]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was fierce and strong. She felt the harbor of why us Pogues were on the run now. It was due to my father. Who had once been the apple of my eye, once been a dependable man. Once been someone I counted on, but he was the one who shot that aim. And landed me fighting for my life. Sarah was scared not that she’d say the words. She was scared of popping her own stitches now. Scared of taking a last breath. And John B he was by my side; he was a good person, even if I got angry with him from time to time. 

“ I’m okay.” An insistent of words. I’m fine. I definitely felt the wound, I felt that skin split when I stood up onto my feet. But i figured if i said the words long enough they’d be true. Sarah was a fighter; she tended to jump into the line of fire without care. And in this case; the pier wasn’t far, her idea of the island she knew it from the back of her head now. And Sarah wanted to be a leader; she wanted to feel empowered to get us pogues out of this mess. And as she stood to her feet; she nodded with a smile, genuine and sweet for him, as her hand laced through his own. “ Okay, but are we sure JJ’s plan is the best? He tends to have outcomes that come knocking on his door..” A grossome expression on her features now, as her hand made its way to his arm, as she prepared to jump on his back. “ I would love to walk John B, but my stitches, my pain level is a 10 right now, so carrying me is best..” Assuming the offer stood. I knew John B he wanted me to be comfortable. 

I was independent by nature, I had my own strength but even I felt that lower pain each time I moved, pick battles and right now I just wanted to be off my feet, and in his arms. A smile a batting of eyes now as I slowly hopped on his back legs wrapped around his waist to prepare for our trip, to the docks, to our ride home.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Eh… [I shrugged slightly in response to her question about JJ’s plan. It was a fair question. JJ was one of my best and most trusted friends, so I’d have his back no matter what, but with that aside, even I couldn’t deny that his track record with his plans working out wasn’t the best. In fact, they failed more often than not. This time around, it seemed like our only option, so even if the odds weren’t necessarily in our favor, we had to give it our best shot] It’s not a great plan, but unfortunately our only option currently. [I confessed. Knowing I couldn’t ever lie to Sarah] In his defense, this seems to be one of his better and more thought out plans, so fingers crossed. [No, that answer wasn’t ideal, or even all that convincing, but again, I couldn’t lie to Sarah. That’s how I felt, so it was a run like hell and hope for the best type of plan right now] Okay, I’ve got you. No matter what. [I assured Sarah as I carefully lifted her up from the floor and into my more than capable arms; cradling her protectively close to me as we cautiously exited the warehouse, met up with JJ who was keeping watch for us right around the corner, and then we started toward the dark alleyways and vacant roadways in an effort to go as unnoticed as possible as we raced like hell toward the boat where the rest of our friend group was waiting]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah had leaped into the pogue life. She had leaped into the trust for John B. She was back to stepping outside of the bubble wrap. It was rushed up adrenaline, it was the adventure, but in this point in time Sarah was scared. Her father had shot at her; the man she once thought stood on a pedestal was the man responsible for her injury. The blood stain through her sweater, the man who put gates over her windows to prevent her from leaving. He grew up on the cut, he transformed his life; he had wealth now. I once admired him, but now when I thought of his face I felt this twirling in my stomach as if my stomach was dropping. 

I was achy, my lower abdomen was in pain, the drugs, the stitching was only going to hold for so long. I knew JJ his lack of track record had spoken for themselves, and I saw that not so trusting expression cross the male’s face even for a split second. But as we established out time was limited before the streets would be swarming with guards, with police, as my father as the huntsmen. I had to swallow any doubt I had, and believe in the only option us pogues had. With a short less than confident bob of my head, the blonde had slipped her arms around John B’s neck, leaning her head on his shoulder, the comfort of his hold. And She wrapped her slander legs around his waist once her grip was in solid ground, she braced herself for the race against time. 

Alleyways with the boys, the short cuts and I had pointed ahead to the marina, where I knew our little boat would be waiting. “ Just straight ahead.” I whispered as if I once grew up here; on this soil summer nights at the beach, late nights on the boats enjoying the sun going down, watchful moons. And now we’re running away; to where? Outer Banks which was once paradise on earth. Hearing from the distant alarms rang off in my head. 

Cops? Worrisome laid out on my face. Let’s hope the others had the rope in hand and ready to back into the ocean the second we landed on the boat.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

No matter what, we’ll figure it out. That’s one thing about the Pogues… Are track record and planning aren’t always great, but we always find a way to get our asses out of trouble. [I joked. Not that this was a time for jokes or quips but I figured Sarah wouldn’t mind the a slight break from the stress and obvious worry she was feeling currently] Besides, when plan A doesn’t work, we’ve got like twenty-five other letters to work through. [I said optimistically while a smirk creased my lips. JJ leading the way; pausing briefly to as we came to openers to make sure nobody was around to catch up before he’d signal with his hand for us to continue] We’re close… [I murmured more so to myself in relief as I saw the waterway approaching. I was eerily confident that if we could make it to the boat without getting caught, that’d we’d be home-free to get the hell away from this island. Sure, I knew it wouldn’t be as easy as I was optimistically trying to write it off as, but I wasn’t anything if not hopeful. Besides, I couldn’t let anything happen to Sarah, so I’d do whatever I needed to in order to get her out of here safely]

[ofnotakook]

Which was true. All joking aside, the pogues had a way of wording or acting themselves out of trouble. The amount of times they’ve nearly gotten themselves thrown in jail and survived. Sarah wasn’t worried about the backup plans, nor was she concerned about putting her trust out in John B. Because she’d trust him with her life. 

It was the sirens, it was alerts that kept cycling through her head. Her fingers held tightly onto John B she swore he felt her grip through his shirt. All that to say, Sarah was nervous. She also knows the island, and her father. He didn’t do well with losing, and when he didn’t have the princess Kook on his side; it was safe to say the man got nervous. And the dirty blonde wasn’t a trophy to be tossed around. Sarah was smart, had her own mind. And this game, this idea that he could steal from the pogues, fake his death it rubbed her wrongly. “ I trust you.” Was all the female was able to muster. Before the crashing of waves were heard, the docks in the clear. I spotted our little boat, the pogues, as Kie waved us over. Leaning my head closer into his neck, I pressed a small kiss to his neck as I leaned my face into him, a smile blossoming on my lips. 

Home free, and as our shoes hit the dock, inches away from the rope of our friends, I spotted the police car, a horn sounded to stop. “ Go.” I said as I aired out with urgency, because it was run or flight, and there’s no way my injury was for nothing. 

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I couldn't help but to smile when I heard Sarah confess that she trusts me. It boded well for me that she did because let's be honest, our plans were far from successful the majority of the time. Let's hoped this latest plan wouldn't be one of those failed missions. Either way, though, I wasn't going down without a fight. Especially knowing I held Sarah's life in my hands right now, too] I got you. [I replied reassuringly as I heard her urgency for us to go. At that, I didn't hesitate to pick up my pace toward the boat where Kie was waving us down. JJ got into the boat first, then offered his help as I carried Sarah and I into the boat. Fortunately for us, Pope had already started up the boat] Everyone lay low... Let's get out of here without anyone seeing our faces. [I instructed. It was a fifty-fifty shot that someone would recognize Pope, Kie, or JJ, but Sarah and I definitely needed to keep ourselves low and out of notice at all costs. We were close now... About to put some necessary space between us and Sarah's father, so we couldn't blow it now. I thought to myself as I grabbed some towels I found on the floor of the boat and covered Sarah and I with them as Pope put the boat into gear and worked to get us out of this harbor as quickly yet subtly as possible. The key now was to avoid bringing any unnecessary attention to us so we had to remain low and act as naturally as we could]

[ofnotakook]

I can always trust in you

@apogueforlife 

I can always trust in you 

Trust; it had to be earned. Love; it had to be developed. For Sarah she always had her guard up. Each time she’d get close to letting someone in the other shoe would drop, she’d freeze up, and run in the other direction. With each boyfriend she ever had she had the urge to run. To distant herself when she felt like she was trapped. When she felt the pressure to feel more than what she did. Topper he liked the idea of her. He loved the idea of being with her; but he wasn’t in love with her. 

There’s only one boy Sarah loved; and that was John B. It happened unexpectedly. It happened on a day she never saw coming. That day stayed with her. The day we went to chapel hill; the day we had fun dressing each other up. The day we pretended to be our alter egos; Val and Vlad. It was nice to be herself. I didn’t feel the pressure to be perfect. I didn’t feel like my family was watching me, I was myself. I felt safe, I felt like John B saw me despite all the flaws I had. He loved me for me, and I loved him. It was a roller coaster of a relationship if you asked me. We had gone from barely knowing each other; to falling completely utterly in love. I gave up my kook card for him. I knew the obsluces we’d be facing now, the pogue’s vs the kook. But nothing made me question my loyalty to him. To the Pogues. It got messy with my dad; him being the reason Big John was gone. The reason why the gold was taken. The reason I was on the run with John B. The gold felt so close yet so far. We managed to clear John B’s name but that’s because Ward decided in his best interest to fake his own death and act like the hero. The guy that claimed to have been a killer in order to protect his own son. Rafe just the thought of being near him made me sick to my stomach. For a second I was upset, I felt like my whole body ached when I witnessed the boat blow up. When I witnessed my father shatter beyond the sea. And that’s when I saw the truth; what led to us being torn apart; what led to John B and I no longer being together. He had been happy to ward dead; and I couldn’t exactly find the words to blame him. He took everything from him. But at the end of the day; he was my dad. I was hurting and I remembered that look all too well; the look of proudnessI felt like I was seeing another person. I was grieving the dad I once looked up to, to the dad that I was once his princess. I needed John B to hold me, to make me feel like it was always going to be okay. But it suddenly felt like us it wasn’t meant to be.. 

Walking away for yourself; was all you could do. It was hard to be near him; to be pulled back into the adventure; to the cross. But for Pope I’d be there; awkwardness assured. Sarah didn’t know if she should make eye contact with him; or just stay silent. Silence seemed better; until that night; we had a plan to get the cross from Rafe; the big truck was parked outside my house. JJ and Pope were hidden behind the bushes. I was determined to walk inside; to get the key to unlock the truck; how we’d get the heavy cross out was a big ass story of it’s own. But I had made two steps to the gates, one glance backwards; I saw him John B was about to get up; and for a second I found myself hopeful; maybe this was the moment of the unknown. What comes next? Dark hues met for a second and I swore the air was taken out of my lungs; but he didn’t budge, didn’t move. Giving me the indication we had nothing left to say. That was the last memory I had of him; of us staring at each other. 

Head leaned against the gated up windows of my room at the barbados house, The house I was locked into. The boat felt like a nightmare; I was drugged by my own family. Rose had put a drug in my tea. Rafe and had helped her execute the plan; to force me here against my will. I remembered telling Ward when he claimed John B only cared about the treasure about the gold that I was just stuck in the cross hair that he was wrong. That John b would find him and come for him once I went missing. How wrong had I been? I wanted to blink back the tears that dared to fall. I was a pogue at heart; I chose it for John B because I loved him, despite our differences he’d always have a permanent place in my heart. It had been weeks since we left on the boat, I had tried to zone out the conversations of my parents; I had pretended to be sleeping at times, but here once I had been pulled into my room I never left. I guess Ward was afraid I’d run, or threaten to tell the cops his own daughter was kidnapped against her will. Give or take. Sarah swallowed the lump in her throat; it had gotten dark. She smelt the tray of food that her sister left her outside the door. Her bed was an inch away; The light pink covers still in place, it had been a day or two since we arrived, and I had slept in my bed because that meant i was okay, that meant that I was adjusting to being here; in this house. When all I wanted was to break free. At the window, on the seat where my back was pressed against the wall. Head tilted towards the window, I could see the water; any boats that passed by. I was alone; and all I could hope was that the Pogue’s were okay that perhaps my dad was right they managed to get the cross and that’s all that mattered for Pope. Eyes moved to the stars; for a moment it was nice to believe we were looking at the same stars; as if John B was on his way; assuming my dad was lying. For now all I could do was hold hope; I’d find a way out; it was a done deal. 

Tomorrow; I’d work out a plan. The Pogues would have me, if I found him. We’d always have each other. A wistful thought as a hint of a smile tainted onto my lips.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Love. Definitely not something I ever believe really existed. I always saw it more as, in life, people come and go. The ones who matter will stick with you, through thick and thin. For me, that was the Pogues: JJ, Kie, and Pope. I don’t remember a time in my life when those three weren’t part of it, and something tells me, I’ll never shake them either. Not that I’d want to, cause they’re everything to me. Then Sarah Cameron busted into my life unexpectedly… One of those surprising moments where I got myself in a sticky situation, and Sarah Cameron, of all people, was the one who bailed me out of it. Even more surprising though was how I felt when I was with her. It was the first time in my life when I found myself wanting to be with a girl exclusively. In time she even made me rethink my original theory about love. Then, well, I guess you could say life happened, and we broke up. Sure, I knew I played a part in our break up. When her father died, I should have been more supportive of the toll that loss would take on Sarah. Yeah, the guy was bad news… A lying crook, which Sarah obviously knew too, but he was still her father. Given the bad blood I had with Ward, and also the fact that he murdered my father, could you really blame me for being relieved that the guy was finally gone? Right or wrong, it’s how I felt. This leading to the end of Sarah’s and my relationship. Still, in my heart I knew this wasn’t the end for us. A love like ours always finds a way back to one another. Naïve or not, I refused to see it any other way…

Then weeks passed and I was starting to wonder if it really had been the end for us. Mind you, I still wasn’t giving up, but instead of dwelling on what may or may not happen between me and Sarah, instead the Pogues and I focused on getting the cross back for Pope. It actually became a, “Kill two birds with one stone” type of adventure for us though, since word got to me that Sarah had been abducted by her family. Them ultimately boarding a ship with Sarah and the cross, allegedly heading to Barbados; knowing that was exactly where we would be going to. This was it… This was our chance to, not only help Pope get the cross back, but also for me to rescue Sarah too…

Given that us Pogues had made some enemies, and also the fact that we didn’t have so much as a pot to piss in, much less money to travel to Barbados, it took some work, a lot of time, and even more creativity on our parts before we finally reached Barbados. Once we did, I knew we needed to devise a plan to get back both Sarah and the cross. Of course JJ, as usual, came up with one of the worst plans I had ever heard. This saying a lot considering JJ’s had some really shitty plans, over the years. This one pretty much topped the other bad plans he’s had though; prompting all of us to shoot down his plan and come up with another one. Knowing it was either come up with a better plan, or go with JJ’s plan which will likely either get us all killed, or at the very least, we’ll end up locked up in some jail cell. In time we did come up with a new plan. Not a great one, but definitely better than JJ’s plan, so it was something, at least. For our part we decided one step at a time…

We’d wait till night, rescue Sarah first, and then once we had her safely out of that house and away from her deranged family, we’d devise a plan to get the cross back. I mean, it’s not like we could just knock on the front door, and request either. Not without being shot, that is. We couldn’t even break in and steal the cross without getting caught, since it was so damn heavy, it was going to take a hell of a lot of brute strength to carry it, so we’d just deal with that plan later. For now, my focus was on Sarah. Sure, I knew there was a chance I’d be the last person she’d want to see tonight, but given me and the Pogue’s rescuing her, or her remaining a hostage with her own family, I figured I was the lesser of the evils, so to speak. I justified as Kie and Pope remained look outs from the ground; keeping hidden to the garden area where they tried to remain unseen, while JJ and I went to the roof. With JJ’s help, he hoisted me down onto the balcony I had scoped out and learned led to the bedroom they were keeping Sarah locked in. Once I approached the balcony window, I peaked inside discreetly; making sure her family was nowhere in sight before I gave a couple of light taps on the window. My way of alerting Sarah that I was here. Of course the window was pad-locked, which just pissed me off more. How could they do this to Sarah? The Cameron’s definition of family was nothing more than a load of bullshit, if you ask me, because this isn’t how you treat family. I thought in building anger as I used the pin I had with me to trigger the lock. Once I heard it click, my eyes shifted up toward JJ. The thumbs up he gave me in reply assuring me he had cut the security system like he confidently told me he could easily handle. This was JJ, so although I’d trust him with my life, and well, I had a few times, I still held my breath as I slowly and gingerly opened the window; expelling a quiet sigh of relief when an alarm didn’t sound as I opened the window] Val…? [I quietly whispered her code name into the dark bedroom. Hoping it would soften any resentment she might have in seeing me here now] Vlad and the crew are here to spring you from here… [I further whispered into the dark bedroom as I waited for her to come over to the window; knowing we didn’t have long before someone would alert the Cameron’s that the security system had been hacked into, so the sooner we got out of there, the better our chances of getting out of here alive]

[ofnotakook]

The pogue plans never went according to plan. Not that Sarah was going to complain now considering. She was able to escape the bars that locked her into her old bedroom. She was tired of starving herself out of spite. She was tired of laying awake at night in fear that she might be dragged out of bed. She was tired of being forced to live the perfect life. Forced to smile for her parents; the only one in her family she liked was her sister Wheezie, she’s who I wanted to protect. But she had young opinions, didn’t see what our family was capable of. And given how much risk John B went through to find me, I had to go with him. Not that I wanted to stay trapped or that I’d risk his life to save my sister. 

I felt torn with myself now. I escaped; I was on the roof; I had survived the lies, I had survived my own father aiming a gun at me; of course to his unknown knowledge Ward did exceed in his aiming and catching fire on one of us. I doubted his attention was to hurt me. Yet again it felt like a toss up considering, he did try to strangle me to death; and drugged me to get onto that stupid boat. But I knew him to know the problem wasn’t my stubbornness, it was John B and the pogues. He was threatened, and right now the Camerons wasn’t my family; it was the pogues. I had chose them a long time ago weather I wanted to admit it or not. 

Safe; is what I felt; despite the pain that was pooling on my side; the white sweater was making it difficult to hide. But I felt his kiss; the graze of his lips on my head, a tenderness of who we were. A love language for us. Seeing as JJ had followed my lead; and started down the ladder; I had stepped forward turning my back to where my hues fell on the male I loved with all my heart. Despite our differences that did come to light when I uttered the words maybe we weren’t meant to be, to work out. 

A soulfulness in my stare as I uttered my words. “ Promise you’ll come down.” I mouthed the words “ I can’t lose you.” As my palm wasn’t already filled with my own blood. Taking my hand from side, I placed them firmly on the handles of the ladder, with one step and than the next. I caught sight of the droplets of blood hitting the ladder as I climbed down, It wasn’t until I reached the bottom, I felt JJ; place his hand on my hip in order to help me off when he wore this stunned expression. “ Sarah.” He mouthed, I knew he felt it; the blood that now covered his hand; I shook my head. “ Don’t say a word.” I had strength I’d be okay until I couldn’t walk anymore; He was about to say something when I hit him in the chest. 

John B would be in earshot; I couldn’t tell him yet; once we were in the clear I’d tell him, but I didn’t want him to worry about me, not after all the risks he took to save me. Pushing myself to the side, I eyed the small area where our feet hit the grass; Kie and Pope had to make it to the gates; where it led to the waterfront it was our get away. Our only glimmer of hope.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I promise. I’ll be right behind you. [I assured Sarah as I watched JJ go down the ladder first, to ensure it was safe for Sarah to follow. Once JJ gave the “all clear” signal, I gave Sarah and nod to begin descending the ladder] You’ll be okay. JJ will meet you at the bottom, and I won’t be far behind. [I reminded her as she started to descend the ladder. I ducked down lower to the roof as I heard the sound of more gunshots looming in the air. Once Sarah was about halfway down the ladder, I started to position myself onto the ladder; getting a good grip on the sides before I slowly began descending the ladder too. It wasn’t long before I could faintly hear Sarah and JJ safely at the bottom on the ground below the ladder, and I was following them moments later. After I reached the bottom, I noticed the concerned look JJ was giving me, but assuming it had something to do with the fact that we were all still in danger on the Cameron’s grounds, I didn’t question JJ on his strange look. Instead, I snaked my arm gently and protectively around Sarah’s shoulder; gently tugging her closer to me before speaking up in a hushed volume] Okay, we made it this far, which is great, but we’re not out of danger yet. Let’s get to Pope and Kie, and then all of us get the hell out of here. [I suggested before nodding my head toward JJ; gesturing for him to lead the way. The sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better our chances would be of us surviving this]

[ofnotakook]

He’d be right behind me. It was a sense of comfort knowing I wasn’t alone.That I was nearly to safety but the question lingered of how long. Because I felt the bleeding on my hip, I felt the lost of blood that peeled from my skin. Not that Sarah was about to utter a word. If she did their plan of escaping would be jeopardized. And JJ and John B had risked it all for her. Kie and Pope were on the lower ground taking cover on her behalf. Sarah wasn’t selfish; she knew when to take one for the team. Her dad; his shots that were fired. It was venages for her; for the Pogues brainwashing her; but the truth was Sarah saw beneath the scars. She saw the truth. The perfect knit family wasn’t real. She had hoped her father would be okay; that he would let her go. Let the pogues go give John B what was rightfully his. 

But instead he saw me as property. I wasn’t a person to him. I was his daughter yes; but I also was my own mind and heard. All that to say I tried not to shake when I heard the gunshots in the distance. I had my hands holding onto the ladder as JJ slowly helped me down. Blood it was obvious at the edge of the ladder; I easily shook my head to JJ; indicating John B didn’t need to know. I was fine. I Swore I caught an edge of concern against his expression. Did JJ care? I asked myself as feet hit the pavement; the edge of the roof as we lowered ourselves down to the ground. His arm was comfort; he was there with me every step of the way. 

Reaching up with my cleared hand; I intertwined my palm with his own. Above my shoulder as I forced a smile. “ almost there.” I whispered as i felt the throbbing on my side; the dripping of redness down my leg; I just hoped it was dark enough to hide. Enough to give us a clear out before I had to say the words. I was shot; a haunting thought as I saw Kie and Pope in sight. 

“ Once we step down one last step, run to the gates, there’s a boat waiting okay. I’ll get the keys.” I told myself it was a solid plan; despite my obvious discomfort to myself. I leaned up to press a kiss to John B’s hand lips against his thumb before I gave the nod to Kie and Pope. 

It was time to run; it was our only chance; even if it meant the Pogues leaving without me; I could handle my injury and my dad; but John B needed an escape or his life was at risk; and right now I cared less about me and more about his safety. “ Run.” Whispered as hands released his own as my body heavily dropped to the ground. Shots being fired; I leaned down enough to swat; to hide under until the walkway cleared.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I gave a nod of relief to Sarah and JJ once our feet finally hit the pavement below. Sure, I knew we still had a challenge ahead of us, even more of one now that Ward knew I had taken Sarah, so I guarantee he wasn’t the only one firing a gun currently. Now we had him, and his whole damn security department firing at us, too. Regardless, we made it this far, which to some, seemed like an impossible feat in and of itself, but we’re still alive, so that’s something. I justified optimistically as Sarah told us the next part of the plan. Good thing we managed to get her out, because JJ nor I had come up with an escape plan. In normal pogue fashion, we planned to wing it once we reached the point… You know, assuming that we made it this far, I should say] Okay, babe. [I said as I heard her instruct us to “run,” and then she released my hand. Given how close I had already come to losing her, I wasn’t about to let her out of my sight; especially in a dangerous situation like this. With that protective thought in mind, I hadn’t run far before realizing she was no longer at my side, or even behind me] Sarah? Sarah, where are you? [I asked in a hushed volume as I started to back track to find her. It didn’t take me long before I nearly tripped over her as she laid down onto the ground] What are you doing? Are you okay? [Assuming maybe she tripped and hurt herself or something, which is why she didn’t get up and continue running with us. Either way, I waited for the latest bout of gun shots to fade out before I helped Sarah up from the ground. This time snaking my arm around her to keep her close as we prepared to catch up with the others] Can you walk? [Prepared to carry her on my back if she was hurt and couldn’t run. Whatever it took to get Sarah safely out of here, I was all for doing it. Sarah’s safety and freedom was my top priority right now]

[ofnotakook]

A getaway plan; honestly Sarah could easily say she had the grounds of the priority mapped out in her head. But the times she’s visited this house she could count on her hand. It was slim; but right now she had to save herself or she risked the chance of Ward getting his hooks not just in her; but it put the pogues in danger. The same people who risked their lives in order to save her. Sarah didn’t take it for granted; she knew she was a mess. She was someone who was torn between love and her family. But she was locked in her own room on more than one occasion. Her father proved he only cared about the gold. It stung; it made Sarah feel like shit; like she wasn’t enough for her own father. 

But now wasn’t the time; the end was near. She felt her knees wobbly, she felt the lost of blood elevate against her frame. Feet planted against the pavement; her eyes scanned the grounds until they reached Kie and Poper who had keys in their hands; they found the keys to the boat under one of my rocks. It was kinda my getaway car back in the day when I wanted to be reckless; I wanted an escape; apparently it was my younger self telling me to be prepared. Because right now our best bet was to run. Run through the pavements; the mountains of trees to get to the edge. I whispered the words. JJ didn’t need any admission; he ran like hell while guns were being fired. Fired at us; which is why I ducked. Not voluntarily; I had fallen to my knees. I had fell right to the ground. I felt my lungs closing off; I felt the air in my body slowly leaving, as I felt my frame hit the ground in a huff. 

I knew John B; he’d never leave without me. I was kinda surprised he hadn’t picked up on the trail of blood I left on the roof; the ladder in my wake. But to my surprise my secret was that a secret. Eyes closed growing heavy that was until I felt his hands roll onto my own palms. Fingers curled around his hands as I slowly pushed myself back onto my feet. “ I’m okay.” A fat lie I screamed at myself. The dirty blonde moved in the threes; in the brushes; her sneakers ran across the lawn until she heard her feet against the pavement. “ John B.. If I fall behind I need you to run like hell okay.” A demand not an ask. The female whispered in a low tone as fingers tighten around his palm. “ I was shot..’ The words stuck on her tongue as she paused; glancing down to her hip; her hip where there was a big ass stain of redness under her sweater; the white sweater now red; she bit down on her lip in fear; and now she’d be the reason they got caught; from running for their lives. 

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what, I would never leave Sarah behind. She was everything to me. Including my favorite pain in the ass that I argued with like we were already a married couple. Point is, I loved Sarah more than life itself, and even though things were a bit up in the open currently between us, that didn’t matter, because I would always come for her. Case and point when I saw her drop down and without a second thought or hesitation, I went back for her and then waited until she was ready to move before we continued our escape. My face turned pale though as I could feel the blood leaving my cheeks when I heard her confession about being shot] What? You were shot? [Quietly repeating the words back to myself, as if trying to process it, but also hoping that I had heard her wrong and she’d correct me now. Judging by the blood I saw that had stained her shirt, I knew I hadn’t imagined it. My worst nightmare was happening now in the fact that Sarah was hurt] It’s going to be okay. I’ll get you out of here and then we’ll get you help. [I assured her. No way in hell of knowing if she was going to be okay or not. I mean, she was shot. With a bullet. She was bleeding, and I had no way of knowing how much blood she’s lost already, because I was just now hearing she was hurt] Let’s get you on my back, and I’ll carry you out of here. [My way of letting her know that, no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her behind, so this way, if we get caught, we’re going to do so together. I silently justified as I squatted down as low as I could, so Sarah didn’t have to strain too much to shift onto my back]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s family was the why the Pogue’s were in this mess. The why we were fighting for our life’s. Namely the finger needed to be pointed towards my father. The man who wanted to be a proud family man, adoring father was willing to aim guns at his own daughter. He chose a hell of a long time ago. I wasn’t the kook anymore; I was a pogue; the family I decided I wanted. My pure love and adoration for John B. He was my everything. The boy I wanted to bicker with day and night. The boy I wanted to run on adventures with. He understood me, I never felt alone with him; I never felt like I had to pretend. I always felt trapped, the need to run from how I felt those strong feelings until I met him. Until we kissed; and fell insanely in love. 

And this island; the gold being unreachable now; was on me. I was the one who believed in my dad; kept opening my mouth and claiming he loves me, he’d never hurt me. I was the fool a disgrace not only had my brother tried to kill me drown me, my own dad wanted me dead. I had nothing but John B and the pogue’s. They were all I needed. 

Each leg of movement was starting to cause a strain on my body. I had no issues running; it was the open wound on my abdomen that was preventing me from moving fast enough. Knees weak, I could barely keep up. I heard the others in a distant reach the boat; the boat that was gassed up; the keys I knew where they were hidden the backup keys I mean. I remembered going out on this boat as a child; for our family trips on the ocean. What an embarrassing moment now considering. Leaning over my frame; eyes staring at the grass that touched my ankles. Head moving to stare between my legs in order to catch my panting breaths. I felt weak, I said the words. And I swore I heard John B stop; he paused in disbelief but the writing was pooling down my legs; the droplets of blood obvious. Tilting my head up I bit down on my lower lip to hold in the whine the pain of my wound. “ John B..” Name lingered on my tongue as tried to find the how I’d get this boy to leave without me. Instead he decided to bend down to the ground. I hesitated, I didn’t want to hold him back. “ I..” I started but I also know this boy; he’d risk it all for me. It didn’t make sense for both of us to risk being caught here, but with last minute thinking I pulled myself onto his back. Arms wrapped loosely around his neck. Legs wrapping around his waist, once I was safely on his back I rested my head on his shoulder. “ You can move now..” I echoed in a nearly teasing retort. Keep it light; until we escaped. 

A death trap of my own making.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what happened, I would never leave Sarah behind. I wasn’t stupid. I knew us breaking into her family’s compound tonight to break her out was a death trap. It was a fool’s errand, but I didn’t care. Sarah was in danger. She might not see how deranged her father and brother are, but I knew. I saw first-hand what her psychotic father was capable of, so I wouldn’t put anything past him now. Including him hurting his own daughter just to ensure he kept her far away from me. The man was a damn lunatic and the sooner I got Sarah away from him, the better off she’d be. The driving reason I broke into her room tonight. Well, “prison” was probably a more fitting word given the bars her father had put on her windows, so she could be kept there as his prisoner. Asshole. I thought in disdain as we ran toward some semblance of safety. I stopped though when I realized Sarah was no longer behind me. Panic setting in since it was dark, which made it difficult to see. Following the sounds of her breaths and rustling through the grass as I back-tracked back toward her. Shock and fear washing over me in hearing she had been shot. A part of me wondering if taking her back to her father was the best course of action, since his ties and pull could have a doctor here in moments. Still, something told me she wouldn’t want to go back there. She’d choose to take the risk to keep moving] I’ve got you. Don’t worry. I’d never leave without you, Sarah. [I assuredly whispered out as I helped her get situated safely on my back; ensuring her arms were wrapped tightly around my neck and her legs secured around my waist before I started through the trees and such in search of JJ and the others] “John B? Where the hell are you?” [I heard the familiar sound of JJ’s voice airing out nearby in a hushed tone. Moving in the direction of his voice, I eventually caught up with them. Keeping Sarah securely on my back as we reached them] “Ready for the next part of the plan? The diversion?” [JJ asked with pride in his voice, which prompted a skeptical look from me. All of us knowing JJ wasn’t the best at plans, but I did feel better when Pope and Kie chimed in to share that they had actually helped with this part of the plan] If it gets us out of here, then hell yeah, do it! [I muttered out as I watched JJ throw a lit flare in the direction of the wooded area we had all just escaped from, before throwing two others in separate directions of the same wooded area. Listening and watching as I saw a small explosion go off, followed by another, and then countless more. Pope and Kie explaining they rigged those while they were waiting for us to break Sarah out. Chuckling in pride and feeling a momentary sense of victory as I realized we temporarily stopped Ward’s guards from catching up; prompting us to continue running the remaining way off of the compounds and then into the city. Now it was just a matter of finding a place to hide out and to get Sarah medical attention] Sarah was shot, so we need to get her to a doctor before we do anything else. [I explained to the others; watching the wheels practically turning in their head on how to work this one out without all of us ending up getting caught]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s greatest fear was her friends, was the boy she loved getting hurt on her behalf. She always believed in the good in her father; that he had made mistakes. But when it came to their family he always held their best interest at heart. But all the evidence was staked against him. He faked his own death; he was okay with putting his arms around my neck. He was okay with shooting a bullet not knowing where it land. And Sarah was caught in that crossfire. She was scared that her now slow pace would hurt the pogues in the end. Her new Family. And she knew better than to fight with John B, than to plead with him to keep going without her. He’d never leave her behind. He was noble, he was the man that loved her more than his own life. 

And she’d risk it all for him too. He was the light in her new darkness. Sarah tried to hide it; the trail of blood she now kept behind her. She held the wound to her hip as tightly as she could; until she fell. She fell forward breathing heavily feeling the impact of loss blood. She was trying to move forward in the deep grass; but her feet stopped. She had hoped the male had moved far enough forward to forget; about her. But his voice was like a compass calling her home. And she had to smile to herself as she pulled herself onto his back. Bitting down on her lip knowing she was in pain; that pain in her side, the pool of blood that was now hitting his shirt. Head slowly came to rest on his shoulder; weakness inside of her. “ I know..” She whispered in a weakened tone. She held on for dear life; she had her arms wrapped around his neck, and her legs slid around his waist; a sense of safety; as we neared the spot where the others were. 

The night was dark; no one noticed her pale face; the weaken state she was in. Another phase to the plan? Her eyes trailed over to the smirks of her friends; the explosions that they had in fact thrown in the direction of each guard growing on their tails. A small smirk tugged at her lips. Severs Ward right, to come for family; and you get burned. The others glanced at her; as the elephant in the room was exposed. She was shot; weak; blood pooling out of her as she spoke. “ I’m fine.” She said as she rested her head back down on his shoulder. She vaguely heard JJ make a plan. “ We run into town. There’s abandoned buildings, maybe we find a doctor office on our way.” It wasn’t settle or optimistic in any form; but maybe if we found supplies; I could stitch up my own wound. I had no desire to see a doctor again; nor could we trust any person wouldn’t go running to Ward. So I had barely said a word; leaving the decision up to John B; he was the fighter; the leader in this mess. I’d trust him; I’d follow him anywhere.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I nodded in response to JJ’s suggestion. No offense to my best friend, or anything, but when he came up with plans, they usually crashed and burned. Then again, his idea to break Sarah out wasn’t his worst plan. Mind you, she did get shot as a result of the escape, but I don’t know if I can necessarily blame JJ’s plan for that, or just pin the blame on Ward for being a deranged and psychotic piece of shit] I think heading toward the town is a good idea, but Sarah definitely needs a doctor. Kai, you still have the fake IDs we had made up for all of us, right? [Kai nodded in response while flashing me a confused look] Okay, so if we go to a doctor’s office or hospital, we can use the fake IDs, so Sarah’s identity doesn’t get back to her father. Either way, we need to get the bullet out of Sarah, and get her stitched up. That’s our first priority once we get off of this property. [I explained. Knowing Sarah was getting weaker from the blood loss, so the sooner we got her gunshot wound tended to, the more at ease I would feel that she’s going to be okay. Honestly, at this point in time, my only concern was Sarah. I kept that thought to myself though, because I knew if I startled to unravel with worry, everyone else would begin unraveling too. Bottom line, we weren’t going to make it out of this situation alive if we didn’t remain level headed and make the right decisions]

[ofnotakook]

Right decisions; was it ever in our nature? To be smart, to not lead on impulse? In the short time Sarah spend with John B and the pogues, she’s learned JJ and John B tended to make decisions on a whim. They tended to come up with a plan and without thinking ran with it. Granted it Sarah owed her life to the poges, she owed the idea that she was released from the bars of her own bedroom due to them. And she appreciated the fact given the limbo state the male and myself were tethered into that they risked it all for me. The wrath from my dad; the Camerons’s who I was learning spelled terrible news. Sarah always believed in her dad; the type of man he was. He was kind, he cared about his family wanted to provide for us. But the money the power it gave a person it tended to steamroll you into a horrible person. Sarah couldn’t believe her eyes; the lengths her dad was willing to go, harming his own daughter, embedding Rafe despite his own crimes. She felt disgusted with her own family. The blonde knew where she belonged; where her heart was. Holding onto dear life to the man she currently had her arms wrapped around. 

The blonde let nimble fingers graze over the thin layer of his shirt; the weak grip she held. Her wound was obvious, the blood pooling down her leg. Ward got her damn good. And Sarah hated her fate was on the edge of a line. Doctors wasn’t an option, she knew this island. She knew Ward was probably on a warpath now for blood. Pogues won by letting my escape happen, and now he’d be paying off any source he could, to get his hands on me. 

The female listened despite her own body was fading, head rested upon his head; the comfort of his scent, she was always safe with him. Eyes blinked open and closed, and she slowly let her weaken vision take in the pogue’s who glanced in every direction Smoke of the explosion was all in the air, intoxicating. “ Go South, we get on the boat, and port half way down the island, there’s a hidden office, our best bets is escaping this house.” A thought for food; a hidden doctors office; one that may get me home sailing. 

Without the risk of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised that, in spite of her condition, Sarah was the one to air out the best and most sensible plan. Giving a nod in response as I looked toward JJ and the others] You heard her. Head south. [I said in agreement as I continued carrying Sarah on my back as we all made route south toward the docks. Knowing our risk was still higher than not of getting caught, but she was right… If we had a chance of getting out of here and to freedom, this was the one with the best odds. More than anything though, I just wanted to get her somewhere safe, so she could get some medical attention. I could hear by how weak her voice was that she was losing a lot of blood. The longer this continues, the worse her chances of survival were. Once we reached the docks, we ducked into the shadows until reaching the boat. I made sure to get Sarah on safely, and then I laid her down across one of the seats to rest, while I helped JJ and Pope to untie the ropes; all the while Kai started up the boat. Knowing we’d all need to work together, and to do so quickly, or else we weren’t getting out of here alive] Okay, Kai, we’re clear. Get us the hell out of here. [I called out to her as me and the other guys pushed the boat away from the dock to give it an oomph and then once the boat was cleared from the sides, I returned to Sarah] How bad is it? [I asked as I grabbed the first aid kit stowed under the one seat. Not that I could do much with my incredibly limited experience and knowledge, but I felt helpless by not doing what I could for her now. Besides, if I could at least slow the bleeding, that would give her the best fighting chance to stay alive until we were able to get her medical attention]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt like she had lost everything. She used to be the girl who would always go to the beck and call of her dad; he used to be the incredible man she grew up with. He used to be the man who read bedtime stories to her. He used to give her a glass of milk each time. She had so many fond memories of him. But now; it felt like those memories were tainted. Sarah had always believed in him, she fought the urges to go against him. Seeing his boat explode it destroyed her; she broke up with John B the man she loved for him, because he was glad the man who took his father away got justice. Was dead. And suddenly it felt like our love wasn’t meant to be. 

And now Sarah was bleeding out because of the man who was supposed to protect her. He shot fire at her; at her friends not caring of the consequences. That was the sadness of the reality. That I was alone. I couldn’t turn to my sister, I couldn’t protect. I had to put myself first, and that was the pogues my made family. We lift each other up, we go to bat for each other. And I knew the high stakes. I knew what my father was capable of. I had to wonder how I had any ounce of love for him after what he’s done. Lying to protect Rafe, letting my brother get away with attempting to drown me, he let me get drugged. He’d rather put harm to me than take accountability. And I had to swallow that truth. With a heavy head I felt like my vision was becoming blur as I spurred the last task at hand. Hands loosen on the grip against John B’s shirt, as my eyes drifted shut. How long had we walked? Before I heard the rustling of feet hitting the docks. And I felt my body being dropped gently into the boat, back pressed against a hard backing on the edge. Slowly eyes lifted seeing blurs. 

Figures moving left and right; the “ Ropes done.” I heard from JJ as both boys plopped themselves down on the boat. Pope was at the wheel with Kie, I heard the soft whispers of nothingness. And I heard his voice, the one that always dragged me home. And I wanted to be honest, as my hand slowly nimbly moved against the dam fabric of my sweater as I lifted it up. And I saw it the blood, it was dark, and it explained why I felt faint. Turning my eyes to the man I loved; John B was preparing to bandage up the wound for a short time. “ It doesn’t look pretty, I’ll have a nasty scar if anything.” I aired out attempting to lighten the mood as I felt the boat move as if it was full of lighten. 

This remembered me of when I saved his ass, when we first started out; on our little adventure. A shy grin turned against my lips as I spoke. “ Last time one of us had to bandage the other up, I was sneaking you into the house, I saved your ass, are we finally repaying the favor?” I asked with a sense of teasing in my voice. Definitely not the time, but I needed a laugh a small brief moment for just us.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Although I knew now wasn’t the time for jokes and quips, I still appreciated the fact that Sarah was trying to keep the mood light between us. Maybe if the circumstances had been reversed, I would have been all for cracking jokes… Hell, I would more than likely be cracking them too. Given that Sarah had been shot and was rapidly losing blood though, I definitely wasn’t in a fun and games kind of mindset. For her sake though, I did flash her a grin as I leaned down to press a tender kiss to her forehead] Well, I figured I owed you so it was high time I stepped up and returned the favor. Maybe next time you want me to save you though, let’s go with something that involves less blood shed and need for panic… Deal? [Giving it my best effort to joke in return. In the meantime I grabbed the first aid kit. My hand shaking slightly as I quickly fished around for some bandaging and things I thought I could use to stop the bleeding] Either way, I’m putting you in charge of keeping an eye on me to make sure I’m doing this right. I mean, doctor stuff is new territory for me so I’ll need the supervision. All that to say, eyes open at all times, okay? [My casual way of requesting to Sarah that I wanted her to keep her eyes open. Afraid that if she closed them and fell asleep, I might lose her. A thought that I couldn’t bear to consider as I started to do what I could to apply pressure to her wound and then applied some gauze and then bandaging too, all in an effort to stop the significant bleeding she was currently experiencing]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was well aware of the bleeding that now wasn’t the time for her humor, for her need to crack a joke open. But Sarah could see how scared he was; it was in his eyes. She was scared herself that she was about to take her last breath, by the hands of her own father. Ward had no idea she was assuming that he had aimed for her; she had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. Her own father pulled the trigger; he was aiming a weapon at her friends, at the man she loved. And now she was facing deaths door; she remembered the last time. 

John B was the one aching in pain as she ran her fingers with a cold rag over his blooded wound; which is why the dirty blonde showed amusement. Or she was going nuts with the lack of blood in her system. Eyes had slowed movement as he spoke; and she knew this was his way of saying “ Stop Sarah.” As if she planned on taking a bullet tonight. But her smile soften knowing feeling the panic under his tone, and her slimmed hand; her hand reached to touch his arm as a soothing of reassurance that she was okay. “ I promise next time, I’ll tell my dad not to shoot.” She echoed with that sarcastic retort of hers. But Sarah was done with the jokes. Not that she had the energy. She felt like her body was giving out; she felt the color had now drained from her face in the dark. She barely felt the boat moving against the water; the ocean seas; the seas that used to bring soothing. That used to make her feel safe; and now she was trembling, she felt his hand on her wound; and she had glanced down the blood was soaking her skin, right through his hand. “ Use the guse to wipe around the wound, and then bandage it gently at least until we arrive.” To a doctor; assuming we had the money to get me treated; or this was the end. Her eyes landed back on his features, and she uttered an “ I love you.” As if it was the last words she’d say. 

Eyes kept fluttering open and shut in a daze, despite the promise to stay with him, to guide him through the process; she hardly felt her hand move down to her side; as if her limbs were jelly now. If only this boat would move any faster..

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I appreciated Sarah’s attempt to crack jokes now. That was kinda our thing, you could say, but at the moment, I felt far from laughing. I was worried and growing even more so with every passing second. Sarah was shot. She was bleeding out currently, and I had no way of knowing if we’d get her medical attention in time to save her] Speed up the boat! Let’s go! [I yelled out to Pope and Kie as I saw Sarah’s eyes close. Judging by the worried look on JJ’s face, I knew he was thinking the same thing I was] Hurry the hell up, JJ, and help me pack her wound. Quick, get those gauze pads from the bag! [My voice shaking in building worry as JJ did as I ordered; grabbing me what I needed as I tossed the now soiled and blood soaked gauze pads to the side as I took the clean ones from JJ’s grasp. My hand shaking as I pressed it against Sarah’s gunshot wound. After what felt like a damn eternity, the boat pulled to a stop. I didn’t exactly know where we were at the moment, but at this point Pope and Kie were tying off the boat to the pier, so it wouldn’t go anywhere, and then they rushed toward us] “Come on. I got word that there’s a surgeon in town who handles cases like this for the right price.” [Pope explained which prompted my brows to furrow in confusion] “Get Sarah, let’s go.” [Kie instructed, which prompted me to tape off the currently gauzed padding I had in place, then JJ helped me to lift Sarah carefully out of the boat and onto the pier. Once JJ and I were on the pier, I cradled Sarah securely in my arms] “Here, take this bag. It should be enough to get her treated. Pope and I will stay with the boat.” [Kie said as JJ grabbed the bag and the address of the warehouse doctor, and then we rushed through the dark night air toward the provided address. A less than ideal situation from all angles given Sarah’s condition and the fact that we were in an unfamiliar place looking for the location of a doctor that we knew nothing about. Talk about a wild card move, at its best] Stay with me, Sarah. We’re going to get you help. Keep fighting. [I called out to her as JJ barked out instructions and I merely kept up with his pace as I carried Sarah in my arms toward our destination]

[ofnotakook]

A scar that might kill me. 

It was a thought for Sarah; she felt like she’d been through the ringer. Her own family was willing to sacrifice her for their own benefits. Sarah once thought the world of her father; of the family. But now she knew the truth they only craved the wealth they’d stomp on anyone who dared to stand in their way. Sarah’s own brother tried to drown her, and now her father was the one who pulled the trigger. Obviously he was aiming for John B, but Sarah knew she’d always end up in the cross fire. 

Not that she cared, she’d rather die than live without him. The words she said that night; on the smaller boat, as John B fought for his life, to escape the death sentence. And I meant it; I loved John B and yeah we fought; we ended up screaming at each other. But i’d do anything to be with him, and now as I was fighting for my own life; I only hoped the pogues survived. Sarah was falling unconscious, she had felt her body shutting off. The last words she spoke were of love, an undenying world of love for him. But she felt the blood lost. She felt her wounds becoming fetel. And she heard the urgent, the eagerness in her man’s voice as she felt the vague packing of her wound. How long had it been? 

She had no idea, because she felt darkness overcome her. She felt like she was falling into limo. She barely felt John B and JJ as they wrapped her sim arms around their shoulders and held her up. Enough to look like Sarah was walking, but she was dragged towards the clinic, and she barely heard the exchange when the surgeon called the three up. And with each step, she felt a slight ache in her body. An ache she wanted to subside. But Sarach knew she had to fight; to live, to open her eyes again. She felt her frame fall to a bedding; as her head hung down as the surgeon whispered. “ It’ll be okay, fight.” And She fel the breathing tube come to her nose, she felt the bleeding that was exposed. The doctor mumbled a few words to her friends. “ Do you have the money? She may not live.” He uttered and I felt my body weak. My own shadow breathing as my eyes slowly woke, for a second to see the unfamiliar surroundings, the walls brown. The tubes connected to me, I was scared. But I couldn’t move before my eyes went shut all over again. 

The doctor took the money and he soon took a tool; to save me, if it did any good, because right now I felt like I was on the brink of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

“Yeah, man. Here.” [JJ aired out in response to the shifty doctor’s request for money, before handing him a bag with money in it. My eyes shifted into a roll watching the doctor count it. So much for a moral code to save a life. Apparently all this asshole cared about what money] Just save her. Please. [I aired out pleadingly as I held Sarah’s hand with my one hand; all the while gently stroking back the hair from her face with my free hand. After a moment or so the doctor seemed satisfied with the amount of money JJ gave him inside that bag, and then he began. Watching as he first put Sarah under with what I assumed to be some kind of anesthesia before he grabbed a questionable looking scalpel so he could begin making the first cut. I knew in my gut that trusting this doctor might be the worst idea we’ve ever had, but at the same point, our hands were tied. It was either this option or we’d lose Sarah. Sure, his “she may not live” statement didn’t leave me with much confidence in his skills, but I had to believe in Sarah now. Sarah was strong. She was brave. If anyone could fight this, it was her] Come on, baby. Fight this. Don’t you dare leave me. Fight, baby. Fight. [I gently pleaded in her ear before pressing a tender kiss to her forehead] “Keep watch.” [I heard the doctor instruct of JJ before giving me a knowing sort of look and then a nod] “Here we go.” [The doctor said in less than a confident tone as he made the first cut; taking the scalpel across Sarah’s skin in order to remove the bullet from her body. It was excruciating to watch, but I promised myself that no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her side] “Grab those gauze pads and some gloves. Pour some of that vial with sanitizing solution directly over the incision spot and then place the gauze pads firmly across the area to slow her bleeding. We don’t want her losing more blood than she already has.” [The doctor instructed; forcing me to release Sarah’s hand, so I could assist in the surgery. After what felt like an eternity, he finished; managing to remove the bullet and then to seemingly successfully repair damage to her wounded organ internally. Once he finished, he stitched her up then covered the wound with a significant amount of gauze pads and medical tape] “It’s a wait and see, at this point, so let’s hope she’s a fighter.” [The doctor said while washing his hands in the sink in the corner of the room] She is. [I flatly said in response before removing my gloves and washing my own hands once the doctor had finished. After ensuring my hands were clean, I returned to the table where Sarah rested and I took her hand in my own] You’re a fighter, Sarah. The strongest person I know, so fight this. I’m not going anywhere. [I had no way of knowing if she could hear me, but I didn’t care. On the off chance that she could, I was going to remind her of her strength and ability to fight this now]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt the screams into darkness. She felt like she was on a cloud in limo. She had no control of her body; she felt like she was paralyzed. She didn’t have the power to move, she barely felt her body being held up. She didn’t want to die, she didn’t want to be traped in her own bedroom. She never asked her own father to shoot bullets at her and her friends. Sarah suddenly felt like her once simply life was a cycle of nightmares. Death on our door steps, the rush of running; being on the med. Sarah knew her getting shot was her fault. If she had just listened to John B weeks ago; that Ward didn’t have my best interest at heart. 

If I had stayed with Pogues instead of trusting my now psychic family. One trying to kill me left and right. Sarah had learned her lesson, the only people she could count on was herself, the pogues, even her sister she just hoped her sister was okay. She knew she was stipid to be thinking about anyone but herself now. But she held sympathy for others. The aching in her body was enough to force her to scream in pain if she wasn’t knocked out. She vaguely heard the way her body gently was placed down on a mental table.  I vaguely felt John B his breath in my ear as he tried to reassure me I was okay, I was a fighter. I was in my own little bubble. The darkness in my lids, the way my body was lifeless, especially as the doctor did insert his tool into my body, if I was awake I’d be screaming. I barely felt it; probably from the anesthesia. I couldn’t move, I had no idea how long I was out. I could vaguely hear the voices as the doctor echoed out it would be touch and go. Would I be surviving? Was I still bleeding out? Sarah felt the stirs in her mind as she laid still. Baby, fight.. Words echoed in my ears. 

John B, he needed me, he needed me to be strong, to fight through the blood lost. I couldn’t let him down. I was groggy when I suddenly felt the strength to open my eyes. The small light above me it flashed my eyes forcing me to squit, and I felt John B’s head on my stomach, not on the wounded skin, but right under. I was aching as I let out a soft wine. My hand pale as I lowered my hand onto his dirty brown locks, fingers slowly combed through his hair. “ John B.” I echoed in a whisper; I couldn’t speak and I noticed JJ was sitting in the chair, eyes closed, even JJ stayed. A made family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Hours passed by and there was no change. Sarah was so still and I had no way of knowing if she’d ever wake up. The doctor didn’t sound hopeful. Made a snide remark about her chances of pulled through as he greedily took our money and then ran like hell like some kind of coward. Clearly it was all about money for him. As more time passed, I found my head resting against Sarah’s side. Near her incision but not close enough to cause any further damage. I just wanted and needed to be close to her now. JJ wasn’t far away. He took a look out to make sure Ward nor any of his men were nearby before he’d return to the private room here and take a seat in the chair adjacent from where Sarah and I rested now. I didn’t know how much more time had passed… Felt like an eternity even though I knew it was probably just a few more hours, but eventually I heard the faint sound of her voice, as well as felt her fingers rustle gingerly through my hair. At that my head immediately shot up and I looked at her. Relief flooding my face and expression currently] You’re awake! Thank God! [I uttered out in evident relief as I pressed a gentle kiss to the back of her hand] How are you feeling? The black market doctor left a few things for pain if you need it. [The guy wasn’t exactly reliable but he did seem to save Sarah’s life, so at the moment, I was thinking a bit more favorably of him. Maybe he wasn’t a total money-hungry quack after all. Jury was still out on that one though] Do you want some water? [I asked as I had already picked up a fresh bottle of water; prepared to give her some if she was thirsty]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt weak, she ha no idea as to how long she’d been laying her. The memory of her father; of how easily he had aimed a gun at her, at her friends because of what? Jealousy? Because he wanted to hold this wild control over her? Sarah had once desired to please her family. She had once idolize her father the memory of us at the docks when I was only a little girl it clouded who I knew he was. 

But a few hours before he was so willing to throw me under the bus. He was so willing to let me bleed out on our yard. Because of his hate for the Pogues. I was hurt, I was feeling betrayed but at the same time, relieved as I felt my body come to life. I felt my eyes lift open as I adjusted to the dim light. I saw JJ in the corner as my eyes peeled over to John B who had his head rested against my palm. And I knew I was lucky, he was here. He loved me, and I had to let my fingers run soothingly through his dirty blonde locks. A small smile peeled at my lips. And I knew I couldn’t move. I felt numb to my core as my body was now healing from the blood lost, Sarah wasn’t going to jump up, the fear of Ward on our tail was aching against my own skin. The blonde had peered up at him; the man she loved so much. 

“ I’m okay.” As okay as I was going to be. The wound had been deep, the stitched up wound was felt as my eyes slowly moved to the man I loved. My hand moved to reach for John B. And I felt a sigh of relief escape my own lips. And I felt my gaze linger on him. “ I’m sorry, I’m sorry my dad is a crazy,” My words could never compare to the pain my family has caused him, the pogues and I wanted to do my part to mend those fences. “ Yes.” I echoed to the option of water my throat felt dry but I wasn’t going to jump forward, I slowly lifted my head up to get to a sitting position. My free hand had moved to my side, knowing the pain; the wound my own family caused.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I felt mounds of relief when I heard Sarah’s voice. She was alive. She was awake, and she was speaking. Lifting her hand to my lips as I pressed a couple of kisses to the back of her hand, then gently lowered her hand back down onto the metal table she was lying on] Hey, don’t apologize. It’s not your fault. All that matters is keeping you safe and away from your deranged family. [No matter what, I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t let Ward harm Sarah again. I thought to myself as I brought a fresh bottle of water to Sarah’s lips, so she could drink as much as she wanted and needed. I knew she needed time to rest and heal, but the sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better I could guarantee her safety from her family. One could hope, at least. I mean the way Ward operated, and the fact that he knew people all over the world, I wasn’t sure exactly how far remote we would need to go, and for how long either for that matter, in order to keep Sarah safe, but no matter what, I’d do what it takes. I came close to losing Sarah this time… Too close for comfort, so I wasn’t willing to take any chances with her safety again. At least not until Ward was no longer a threat to her] Once you’re well enough, we’re going to get you out of here. Pope and Kie are keeping an eye on the boat, and when you’re strong enough, we’re all getting on that boat, and getting as far away as possible. We figure with some distance and preferably some place off the grid, eventually your father will stop looking for you. [Maybe wishful thinking since Ward wasn’t one who took well to losing, but one could hope he’d eventually give up and accept that Sarah was gone]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah kept asking herself the obvious how she’d been blind. How she was capable of still holding a torch of love for her family. With all the crimes all the ways her own brother tried to murder her; sending drug mules her way, being the one that nearly drowned her to death. And now her own father; was so mad at the Pogues so terrified of losing his daughter to the pogues; not wanting to lose the fight that he aimed and shot me. The blood that once covered her fingertips, the blood the redness that ran over her sweater, it was an image Sarah couldn’t erase.  

Her friends, her boyfriend? Cut into the crossfires because of her fucked up  family. And even now as she opened her eyes; said a few words, she felt the aching on her wound, damn that stitch is gonna hurt like hell. But it was comforting to feel his touch, to witness his lips touching her knuckles once again. John B, he was her anchor that kept her whole. A soften expression; a smile curled at the corners of her lips as she saviored his touch; his lips against her skin. “  They drugged me, they forced me here. I feel trapped like no one is safe in that house, but my sister..”  A fear for the little Cameron it rocked me whole now, as I felt the lump forming in my throat. Wheezie she was innocent had no idea who’s roof she was living under. Like myself; I’d been blinded from the truth. But now my father was deranged; he passed off onto Rafe; and Rose was clueless as ever a pond in the game; until she crossed Ward. 

A slight cough was heard; as the blonde felt the wetness hit her tongue, one sip of water turned into half the bottle until she released the top from her lips and she slowly sat herself up, her palms hitting the metal of the table to hold herself up. Nuts insane considering her own wounds she wore. But her eyes ran along John B’s features with ease. “ You know he won’t let that happen. He blames you the pogues for his princess no longer being in his care. I’m a game for him to win..” A sad truth, an ached formed in her chest now.  “ I wouldn’t blame you if you allowed the pogues to leave me here for  dust to get away. I don’t want to bring you down, or put you and pogues in danger..” Not again the words hid  at the tips of her tongue. 

Danger; our names, but Ward he’d kill to end the war..I was terrified the lengths he’d go no matter how safe I felt with John B; he’d get hurt because of me. A pill I needed to swallow now.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, that would never happen. [I flatly replied with a matter of fact sort of shrug. Sure, I knew if this was just about Sarah, maybe JJ and the others would have high-tailed it out of here. Not necessarily Pope since he had a heart to do the right thing, but Kie was what you could say, hot and cold toward Sarah, so it wouldn’t take much for her to bail on Sarah. And well, JJ hated Kooks in general, so he had no loyalties to Sarah either. Thing was though, they all knew I’d literally die to protect Sarah, and the Pogues would always put their lives on the line to protect each other. All that to say, as long as I was staying put at Sarah’s side, the Pogues wouldn’t be going anywhere either because they’d always have my back, just like I’d always have theirs too. We fought fiercely for each other] Even if the others decided to high-tail it out of here, I’d never leave your side. Unless you tell me to go, I’m not going anywhere… [I started to say before an amused smirk followed] And even then, I can’t promise I’d actually leave. You know I’m stubborn when people try to tell me what to do. [I teased even though that was the truth] Either way, once you’re well enough, we’re all getting the hell out of here, and getting to safety together. Until then, just rest and heal. [I said as I gave her hand another gentle squeeze. My way of reassuring her that we were all in this together; no matter what the outcome]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah knew her choices  as of late not only disappointed herself but those around her. Sarah never wanted the wealth, she never wanted to be accepted as the princess Kook. That title had been given to her. People made assumptions about her; her personality; how she followed the kook business, and yes once upon a time she was a kook. Bu from that one day running around with John B at chapel Hill, helping him seek answers to a quest she had no idea how over our heads we were. We were just kids running around aimlessly. But I saw that treasure hunting look in his eyes; the way his eyes lit up at a map, and I mused, I admired who John B. And he made me want more for myself. 

One day; one rain kiss on the docks was all it took for the dirty blonde to feel hooked. He’s who she loved, and even with death upon us; my dad probably having a search squad on our heads. I had let the pogues down; when I had let John B go, I was angry, I was sad when I thought my dad died, and john B was just so glad to see him fall through the cracks. My dad was money hungry, he was awful he killed, he allowed Rafe to get away with Murder, but he was my dad; but now as I groggily came out of my unconscious state; I remembered the cage I felt locked in. I recalled his aim, the gun shot wound that should’ve killed me. My own father aimed the trigger, and right now Sarah knew in her gut she was a pogue, and she appreciated the friendships she made. Eyes glanced over for comfort to the boy that made her heart race. And her pinky found his; a trace of her finger against his own. 

“ I made that mistake once, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for letting you go John B, I was..” Pausing briefly before a sigh could be heard escaping her lips. “ I was hurting, I didn’t want to believe my dad was this monster. I know you said you’ve always got me, but I wouldn’t blame you if you decided no one chances.” Chances to love me, to be together after this horror war my dad had, all the times guns aimed at us because of him, a war he wanted to win on behalf of me. One he already lost. 

Because my heart; who I was, it was a pogue; my known family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I get it, Sarah. Before I came into your life and opened your eyes to who your dad and brother really are, you had a really tight bond with your dad. Naturally you’d want to fight to protect his reputation. It only makes sense that you wouldn’t want to believe your dad was capable of something like that. If the situation was reversed, and it was me in your shoes, I probably would have done the same thing as you. [I admitted honestly. It was the truth. If this was my dad, I would have fought to protect his reputation too. It’s what you do for the people you love. I’d do it for Sarah and the pogues too because I consider them my family. No matter what, I’d always have their backs, just like I know the pogues would have mine] You’ll never run out of chances with me, Sarah. I hate to break it to you, but I love you, so until you say otherwise, you’re stuck with me. [As much truth as there was in my words, I aired out that honesty with a joking tone] Anyway, for now, we just need to get your strong enough that we can move somewhere safer for the duration of your recovery. [I knew where we were would suffice for now, but it would only be a matter of time before Sarah’s dad figures out we’re hiding out here currently. We’d cross that bridge if and when the time comes. For now I wanted Sarah to get a little stronger and heal up a bit before we decide to move her]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah had always been privileged growing up. She knew of the different layers of the island. She never wanted to believe in herself to judge others; the living, how some had to work harder than others. But Sarah was guilty to pulling away when it felt messy and difficult. When someone got too close to her; she was the one guilty of running. The fear of being seen truly. It’s what happened with her friendship with Kie, and it was easy to blame the split on how John B reacted to her father’s then death. But the truth was Sarah was scared. 

Scared of letting go of the shielded life she lived, the ground beneath her gone. Her family shattered into pieces. Her dad wasn’t the man she once admired. He was a monster; he felt threatened he knew I wasn’t under the spell, and he tried to hurt me. My own brother tried to kill me, did I feel safe with my family? No I was shot because of my dad, and now I felt the numbness against my skin. The numbness that tingled the layer of my stomach; where the scars stood. I wouldn’t blame John B if he wanted to cut loses here, and leave me stranded. But I knew him his heart; the good boy inside of him; the boy I loved with every fiber inside of me. “ It’s not about him anymore. I knew who he was; he wasn’t the dad I once laughed with on the beach when I was a little girl, he knew he lied, he knew what he did, and my brother is protecting him. I’m sorry for the pain my family caused you.” The pogues hanging onto my lips. 

Hearing the words; unlimited chances hung in the air. I love you; and I loved him, I wouldn’t let the male get away from me again. Sarah tried her best to master the pain, the smile heated against brims as her hand grasped hold of his fingers. “ I love you.” words spoken as the blonde attempted to sit up using the strength of her elbows to hold her upper frame upright. But she knew staying put wasn’t an option; Ward had his minions surroundings areas; I would gasp through the pain than get caught. An intense stare hinted into my features as I spoke. “ John B.. we have to move. I can handle the pain. This island isn’t safe not with my dad, he has people..” And I knew Ward; he wanted power; to hold an angle, and us staying still didn’t feel safe; for me or the pogues.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I knew Sara was right… We had to move sooner rather than later. We were basically sitting ducks here. Ward had this whole island in his pocket, so it would only be a matter of time before he got wind of the fact that we were here. I’ll be damned if I did all this work to break Sara out of there… And then to get her the help she needed after she got shot, just for that deranged idiot to take her back to the prison he had her encamped in] Okay, if you’re sure you can handle it, we’ll move. [Worried if she busts a stitch she may bleed out though] We need to take it slow though. Be smart about this. We can’t afford you busting any stitches. If you bleed out… [I trailed off. Not even able to finish off the thought of that possibility] Let me tell JJ we’re going to move. [I said as I pressed a kiss to Sara’s forehead; letting my lips linger there for a second or two before I broke away. It was almost like I didn’t want to let her out of my sight; fearful I’d lose her] Be right back. [I promised as I briefly and reluctantly left the table she was resting on in order to find JJ, who was keeping watch just outside] We’re moving. We need to get off of this island. Alert the others. [JJ agreed; immediately pulling out his phone to message the others to get the boat ready for our momentary departure. In seeing JJ got the ball rolling on that, I returned to Sara. Preparing to move her once she gave me the okay. I still felt unsettled about us leaving, but at least night had set in, so that would give us the advantage as we used the darkness, shadows, and any alleyways we could find to our advantage] Just tell me when, and I’ll help you off the table.

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was embarrassed of who her family was now. It used to be a loving home, used to be a place of safety. The countless family dinners outside on the docks by the grills. The countless boat rides we had. The loving embraces from her dad; he used to be a home for her. And now when she thought about Ward all she felt was anger, betrayal. Someone who only cared about greed, he went out of his way to coverup a death, to frame John B, and now he even if it was an accident he shot me. I was stitched up because of him. All that to say; I didn’t want to be stuck on this island for one more minute. I was on edge, my hand touching the bandaged wound, as I felt the pain. We’re sitting ducks; Ward had his minions all over the island; it was possible he’d be hunting me down. This was a lowkey office; and I doubted this bystander of a doctor was on the payroll. 

I was aching, I didn’t want the drugs, but I also had to put the pogues first; John B first. They came to Nassau for her, Sarah didn’t care if she was limbing in pain whimpering as she sped up to walk as long as we ended up on that boat and made our way back to OBX a home, a new safety. We’d find a way to the gold; our rightful place of earnings. Sarah could see the concern written on John B’s face now, but she was okay. A smile of reassurance coming from her now. She laid kept on the metal table now, as she nodded, biting down on her lower lip to hold out on any pain. “ I promise, slow and steady wins the race.” I added with a joke, Sarah found her more humours side with him. The touch of his lips on her forehead, it made her insides turn, the butterflies now. Sarah had waited until John B had stepped outside to inform JJ before she was able to slowly sit back up. Damn the shooting pain that ran up her side. Deep breaths, Sarah was about to move to step down from the table when she heard her boyfriend, A soft brave smile came to her lips. Reaching out her hand to grasp hold of his arm for support. “ We need to move. I’m ready.” Her stitching may not be; but I could rest once we got safety; but until the docks came into view the dirty blonde wouldn’t feel at ease. 

An unsettling feeling at the pit of her stomach.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised the second I offered my help to Sarah once she was ready, she didn’t hesitate to take my hand. Anybody else would be feeling sorry for themselves and their situation, but not Sarah. She was a total bad ass. By far, the bravest person I knew. Thing was though, I hated moving her. She nearly bled out and died after being shot. Her stitches were the only thing keeping her from doing so now, so what she needed more than anything was to rest and heal. Problem was, her deranged father and his entourage of employees that would be on the look out for us. I didn’t like having to move her from here, but it was either this, or get caught by her father’s people. Neither outcome was ideal, which was why I left the final choice up to Sarah. Her answer clear as day when she held out her hand and took a hold of my arm for support] I can carry you. I’ll do the whole slow and steady thing… Taking your word on the winning the race part you joked about. [Flashing her an amused grin. Knowing now wasn’t the time for fun and jokes, but maybe we both needed a little light humor given the shitty circumstances we were facing. I silently told myself as I helped her off the metal table she was lying across and then kept a secure hold on her until she was steady on her feet] You good? [Needing to know she was okay before I made any further movements or plans]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah should’ve been more hesitant to move. Given the amount of stitches her body had to have, the amount of blood she had lost from that gunshot. The one that came from her father. Sarah if she had too much time to dwell on it would start feeling useless a burden to her own family. Because one her dad was willing to lie for Rafe, yet the innocent child like myself was left to scrape by. Pick a side, and my heart was with the pogues, with John B. And my brother was a bit deranged now, but I suppose father like son, Rafe had to get that attitude from somewhere didn’t he? 

I fought the urge to roll my eyes now. As I found that strength to lift my body up to sit and reach my feet the white tennis shoes to the ground. And I did and felt that aching pain on my lower abdomen. Where the stitches were, and as John B came to view I wore a gentle smile as I reached to brace myself for the pain as I put the weight on my feet. Fingers wrapping around his forearm you felt his muscles now as I found my courage to fully stand. “ I don’t want to make it harder for you to run, I’ll try to keep up.” A promise to my heart, but if John B and the others got hung up because of me I’d never forgive myself. The pogues were in a tough spot because of me. And I hated it, I’d rather bleed out on that table than for them to get caught. All that to say, my hand slid into his bigger palm with a squeeze. “ I’m ready, let’s meet the others.” Conviction in my tone as with an easy step started towards the exit doors; to leave, before my dad found us, before we felt in hot waters.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, I don’t want to run the risk of you popping one of your stitches and bleeding out, so we’ll take it slow and steady. Hell, if we have to crawl there to keep your safe, then so be it. [Mind you I didn’t expect either of us to crawl, obviously, but I was just trying to prove a point now. No matter what risk came to me, Sarah’s safety and well-being would always be my top focus. I silently thought to myself as I gave her hand a gentle squeeze] I’m good carrying you if that will be easier and less painful than you having to walk. [Fortunately the pier wasn’t far from here, but the problem was, we couldn’t exactly walk right down main street to get there since Sarah’s father, no doubt, had people out there looking for us. Nah, we needed to take the most discreet way possible in order to keep ourselves from getting noticed before we reach the boat that would hopefully get us the hell out of there] JJ’s right outside waiting for us… He’s already figured out a plan with the best route we should take to get to the pier where the boat’s waiting for us. [I explained as I securely and protectively held her close to me as she got on her feet; giving her a nod in reply as she gave the “okay” that she was ready] Walking or do you want me to carry you? [Knowing Sarah had an independent side to her so I figured I’d leave the decision up to her]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was fierce and strong. She felt the harbor of why us Pogues were on the run now. It was due to my father. Who had once been the apple of my eye, once been a dependable man. Once been someone I counted on, but he was the one who shot that aim. And landed me fighting for my life. Sarah was scared not that she’d say the words. She was scared of popping her own stitches now. Scared of taking a last breath. And John B he was by my side; he was a good person, even if I got angry with him from time to time. 

“ I’m okay.” An insistent of words. I’m fine. I definitely felt the wound, I felt that skin split when I stood up onto my feet. But i figured if i said the words long enough they’d be true. Sarah was a fighter; she tended to jump into the line of fire without care. And in this case; the pier wasn’t far, her idea of the island she knew it from the back of her head now. And Sarah wanted to be a leader; she wanted to feel empowered to get us pogues out of this mess. And as she stood to her feet; she nodded with a smile, genuine and sweet for him, as her hand laced through his own. “ Okay, but are we sure JJ’s plan is the best? He tends to have outcomes that come knocking on his door..” A grossome expression on her features now, as her hand made its way to his arm, as she prepared to jump on his back. “ I would love to walk John B, but my stitches, my pain level is a 10 right now, so carrying me is best..” Assuming the offer stood. I knew John B he wanted me to be comfortable. 

I was independent by nature, I had my own strength but even I felt that lower pain each time I moved, pick battles and right now I just wanted to be off my feet, and in his arms. A smile a batting of eyes now as I slowly hopped on his back legs wrapped around his waist to prepare for our trip, to the docks, to our ride home.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Eh… [I shrugged slightly in response to her question about JJ’s plan. It was a fair question. JJ was one of my best and most trusted friends, so I’d have his back no matter what, but with that aside, even I couldn’t deny that his track record with his plans working out wasn’t the best. In fact, they failed more often than not. This time around, it seemed like our only option, so even if the odds weren’t necessarily in our favor, we had to give it our best shot] It’s not a great plan, but unfortunately our only option currently. [I confessed. Knowing I couldn’t ever lie to Sarah] In his defense, this seems to be one of his better and more thought out plans, so fingers crossed. [No, that answer wasn’t ideal, or even all that convincing, but again, I couldn’t lie to Sarah. That’s how I felt, so it was a run like hell and hope for the best type of plan right now] Okay, I’ve got you. No matter what. [I assured Sarah as I carefully lifted her up from the floor and into my more than capable arms; cradling her protectively close to me as we cautiously exited the warehouse, met up with JJ who was keeping watch for us right around the corner, and then we started toward the dark alleyways and vacant roadways in an effort to go as unnoticed as possible as we raced like hell toward the boat where the rest of our friend group was waiting]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah had leaped into the pogue life. She had leaped into the trust for John B. She was back to stepping outside of the bubble wrap. It was rushed up adrenaline, it was the adventure, but in this point in time Sarah was scared. Her father had shot at her; the man she once thought stood on a pedestal was the man responsible for her injury. The blood stain through her sweater, the man who put gates over her windows to prevent her from leaving. He grew up on the cut, he transformed his life; he had wealth now. I once admired him, but now when I thought of his face I felt this twirling in my stomach as if my stomach was dropping. 

I was achy, my lower abdomen was in pain, the drugs, the stitching was only going to hold for so long. I knew JJ his lack of track record had spoken for themselves, and I saw that not so trusting expression cross the male’s face even for a split second. But as we established out time was limited before the streets would be swarming with guards, with police, as my father as the huntsmen. I had to swallow any doubt I had, and believe in the only option us pogues had. With a short less than confident bob of my head, the blonde had slipped her arms around John B’s neck, leaning her head on his shoulder, the comfort of his hold. And She wrapped her slander legs around his waist once her grip was in solid ground, she braced herself for the race against time. 

Alleyways with the boys, the short cuts and I had pointed ahead to the marina, where I knew our little boat would be waiting. “ Just straight ahead.” I whispered as if I once grew up here; on this soil summer nights at the beach, late nights on the boats enjoying the sun going down, watchful moons. And now we’re running away; to where? Outer Banks which was once paradise on earth. Hearing from the distant alarms rang off in my head. 

Cops? Worrisome laid out on my face. Let’s hope the others had the rope in hand and ready to back into the ocean the second we landed on the boat.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

No matter what, we'll figure it out. That's one thing about the Pogues... Are track record and planning aren't always great, but we always find a way to get our asses out of trouble. [I joked. Not that this was a time for jokes or quips but I figured Sarah wouldn't mind the a slight break from the stress and obvious worry she was feeling currently] Besides, when plan A doesn't work, we've got like twenty-five other letters to work through. [I said optimistically while a smirk creased my lips. JJ leading the way; pausing briefly to as we came to openers to make sure nobody was around to catch up before he'd signal with his hand for us to continue] We're close... [I murmured more so to myself in relief as I saw the waterway approaching. I was eerily confident that if we could make it to the boat without getting caught, that'd we'd be home-free to get the hell away from this island. Sure, I knew it wouldn't be as easy as I was optimistically trying to write it off as, but I wasn't anything if not hopeful. Besides, I couldn't let anything happen to Sarah, so I'd do whatever I needed to in order to get her out of here safely]

[ofnotakook]

I can always trust in you

@apogueforlife 

I can always trust in you 

Trust; it had to be earned. Love; it had to be developed. For Sarah she always had her guard up. Each time she’d get close to letting someone in the other shoe would drop, she’d freeze up, and run in the other direction. With each boyfriend she ever had she had the urge to run. To distant herself when she felt like she was trapped. When she felt the pressure to feel more than what she did. Topper he liked the idea of her. He loved the idea of being with her; but he wasn’t in love with her. 

There’s only one boy Sarah loved; and that was John B. It happened unexpectedly. It happened on a day she never saw coming. That day stayed with her. The day we went to chapel hill; the day we had fun dressing each other up. The day we pretended to be our alter egos; Val and Vlad. It was nice to be herself. I didn’t feel the pressure to be perfect. I didn’t feel like my family was watching me, I was myself. I felt safe, I felt like John B saw me despite all the flaws I had. He loved me for me, and I loved him. It was a roller coaster of a relationship if you asked me. We had gone from barely knowing each other; to falling completely utterly in love. I gave up my kook card for him. I knew the obsluces we’d be facing now, the pogue’s vs the kook. But nothing made me question my loyalty to him. To the Pogues. It got messy with my dad; him being the reason Big John was gone. The reason why the gold was taken. The reason I was on the run with John B. The gold felt so close yet so far. We managed to clear John B’s name but that’s because Ward decided in his best interest to fake his own death and act like the hero. The guy that claimed to have been a killer in order to protect his own son. Rafe just the thought of being near him made me sick to my stomach. For a second I was upset, I felt like my whole body ached when I witnessed the boat blow up. When I witnessed my father shatter beyond the sea. And that’s when I saw the truth; what led to us being torn apart; what led to John B and I no longer being together. He had been happy to ward dead; and I couldn’t exactly find the words to blame him. He took everything from him. But at the end of the day; he was my dad. I was hurting and I remembered that look all too well; the look of proudnessI felt like I was seeing another person. I was grieving the dad I once looked up to, to the dad that I was once his princess. I needed John B to hold me, to make me feel like it was always going to be okay. But it suddenly felt like us it wasn’t meant to be.. 

Walking away for yourself; was all you could do. It was hard to be near him; to be pulled back into the adventure; to the cross. But for Pope I’d be there; awkwardness assured. Sarah didn’t know if she should make eye contact with him; or just stay silent. Silence seemed better; until that night; we had a plan to get the cross from Rafe; the big truck was parked outside my house. JJ and Pope were hidden behind the bushes. I was determined to walk inside; to get the key to unlock the truck; how we’d get the heavy cross out was a big ass story of it’s own. But I had made two steps to the gates, one glance backwards; I saw him John B was about to get up; and for a second I found myself hopeful; maybe this was the moment of the unknown. What comes next? Dark hues met for a second and I swore the air was taken out of my lungs; but he didn’t budge, didn’t move. Giving me the indication we had nothing left to say. That was the last memory I had of him; of us staring at each other. 

Head leaned against the gated up windows of my room at the barbados house, The house I was locked into. The boat felt like a nightmare; I was drugged by my own family. Rose had put a drug in my tea. Rafe and had helped her execute the plan; to force me here against my will. I remembered telling Ward when he claimed John B only cared about the treasure about the gold that I was just stuck in the cross hair that he was wrong. That John b would find him and come for him once I went missing. How wrong had I been? I wanted to blink back the tears that dared to fall. I was a pogue at heart; I chose it for John B because I loved him, despite our differences he’d always have a permanent place in my heart. It had been weeks since we left on the boat, I had tried to zone out the conversations of my parents; I had pretended to be sleeping at times, but here once I had been pulled into my room I never left. I guess Ward was afraid I’d run, or threaten to tell the cops his own daughter was kidnapped against her will. Give or take. Sarah swallowed the lump in her throat; it had gotten dark. She smelt the tray of food that her sister left her outside the door. Her bed was an inch away; The light pink covers still in place, it had been a day or two since we arrived, and I had slept in my bed because that meant i was okay, that meant that I was adjusting to being here; in this house. When all I wanted was to break free. At the window, on the seat where my back was pressed against the wall. Head tilted towards the window, I could see the water; any boats that passed by. I was alone; and all I could hope was that the Pogue’s were okay that perhaps my dad was right they managed to get the cross and that’s all that mattered for Pope. Eyes moved to the stars; for a moment it was nice to believe we were looking at the same stars; as if John B was on his way; assuming my dad was lying. For now all I could do was hold hope; I’d find a way out; it was a done deal. 

Tomorrow; I’d work out a plan. The Pogues would have me, if I found him. We’d always have each other. A wistful thought as a hint of a smile tainted onto my lips.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Love. Definitely not something I ever believe really existed. I always saw it more as, in life, people come and go. The ones who matter will stick with you, through thick and thin. For me, that was the Pogues: JJ, Kie, and Pope. I don’t remember a time in my life when those three weren’t part of it, and something tells me, I’ll never shake them either. Not that I’d want to, cause they’re everything to me. Then Sarah Cameron busted into my life unexpectedly… One of those surprising moments where I got myself in a sticky situation, and Sarah Cameron, of all people, was the one who bailed me out of it. Even more surprising though was how I felt when I was with her. It was the first time in my life when I found myself wanting to be with a girl exclusively. In time she even made me rethink my original theory about love. Then, well, I guess you could say life happened, and we broke up. Sure, I knew I played a part in our break up. When her father died, I should have been more supportive of the toll that loss would take on Sarah. Yeah, the guy was bad news… A lying crook, which Sarah obviously knew too, but he was still her father. Given the bad blood I had with Ward, and also the fact that he murdered my father, could you really blame me for being relieved that the guy was finally gone? Right or wrong, it’s how I felt. This leading to the end of Sarah’s and my relationship. Still, in my heart I knew this wasn’t the end for us. A love like ours always finds a way back to one another. Naïve or not, I refused to see it any other way…

Then weeks passed and I was starting to wonder if it really had been the end for us. Mind you, I still wasn’t giving up, but instead of dwelling on what may or may not happen between me and Sarah, instead the Pogues and I focused on getting the cross back for Pope. It actually became a, “Kill two birds with one stone” type of adventure for us though, since word got to me that Sarah had been abducted by her family. Them ultimately boarding a ship with Sarah and the cross, allegedly heading to Barbados; knowing that was exactly where we would be going to. This was it… This was our chance to, not only help Pope get the cross back, but also for me to rescue Sarah too…

Given that us Pogues had made some enemies, and also the fact that we didn’t have so much as a pot to piss in, much less money to travel to Barbados, it took some work, a lot of time, and even more creativity on our parts before we finally reached Barbados. Once we did, I knew we needed to devise a plan to get back both Sarah and the cross. Of course JJ, as usual, came up with one of the worst plans I had ever heard. This saying a lot considering JJ’s had some really shitty plans, over the years. This one pretty much topped the other bad plans he’s had though; prompting all of us to shoot down his plan and come up with another one. Knowing it was either come up with a better plan, or go with JJ’s plan which will likely either get us all killed, or at the very least, we’ll end up locked up in some jail cell. In time we did come up with a new plan. Not a great one, but definitely better than JJ’s plan, so it was something, at least. For our part we decided one step at a time…

We’d wait till night, rescue Sarah first, and then once we had her safely out of that house and away from her deranged family, we’d devise a plan to get the cross back. I mean, it’s not like we could just knock on the front door, and request either. Not without being shot, that is. We couldn’t even break in and steal the cross without getting caught, since it was so damn heavy, it was going to take a hell of a lot of brute strength to carry it, so we’d just deal with that plan later. For now, my focus was on Sarah. Sure, I knew there was a chance I’d be the last person she’d want to see tonight, but given me and the Pogue’s rescuing her, or her remaining a hostage with her own family, I figured I was the lesser of the evils, so to speak. I justified as Kie and Pope remained look outs from the ground; keeping hidden to the garden area where they tried to remain unseen, while JJ and I went to the roof. With JJ’s help, he hoisted me down onto the balcony I had scoped out and learned led to the bedroom they were keeping Sarah locked in. Once I approached the balcony window, I peaked inside discreetly; making sure her family was nowhere in sight before I gave a couple of light taps on the window. My way of alerting Sarah that I was here. Of course the window was pad-locked, which just pissed me off more. How could they do this to Sarah? The Cameron’s definition of family was nothing more than a load of bullshit, if you ask me, because this isn’t how you treat family. I thought in building anger as I used the pin I had with me to trigger the lock. Once I heard it click, my eyes shifted up toward JJ. The thumbs up he gave me in reply assuring me he had cut the security system like he confidently told me he could easily handle. This was JJ, so although I’d trust him with my life, and well, I had a few times, I still held my breath as I slowly and gingerly opened the window; expelling a quiet sigh of relief when an alarm didn’t sound as I opened the window] Val…? [I quietly whispered her code name into the dark bedroom. Hoping it would soften any resentment she might have in seeing me here now] Vlad and the crew are here to spring you from here… [I further whispered into the dark bedroom as I waited for her to come over to the window; knowing we didn’t have long before someone would alert the Cameron’s that the security system had been hacked into, so the sooner we got out of there, the better our chances of getting out of here alive]

[ofnotakook]

The pogue plans never went according to plan. Not that Sarah was going to complain now considering. She was able to escape the bars that locked her into her old bedroom. She was tired of starving herself out of spite. She was tired of laying awake at night in fear that she might be dragged out of bed. She was tired of being forced to live the perfect life. Forced to smile for her parents; the only one in her family she liked was her sister Wheezie, she’s who I wanted to protect. But she had young opinions, didn’t see what our family was capable of. And given how much risk John B went through to find me, I had to go with him. Not that I wanted to stay trapped or that I’d risk his life to save my sister. 

I felt torn with myself now. I escaped; I was on the roof; I had survived the lies, I had survived my own father aiming a gun at me; of course to his unknown knowledge Ward did exceed in his aiming and catching fire on one of us. I doubted his attention was to hurt me. Yet again it felt like a toss up considering, he did try to strangle me to death; and drugged me to get onto that stupid boat. But I knew him to know the problem wasn’t my stubbornness, it was John B and the pogues. He was threatened, and right now the Camerons wasn’t my family; it was the pogues. I had chose them a long time ago weather I wanted to admit it or not. 

Safe; is what I felt; despite the pain that was pooling on my side; the white sweater was making it difficult to hide. But I felt his kiss; the graze of his lips on my head, a tenderness of who we were. A love language for us. Seeing as JJ had followed my lead; and started down the ladder; I had stepped forward turning my back to where my hues fell on the male I loved with all my heart. Despite our differences that did come to light when I uttered the words maybe we weren’t meant to be, to work out. 

A soulfulness in my stare as I uttered my words. “ Promise you’ll come down.” I mouthed the words “ I can’t lose you.” As my palm wasn’t already filled with my own blood. Taking my hand from side, I placed them firmly on the handles of the ladder, with one step and than the next. I caught sight of the droplets of blood hitting the ladder as I climbed down, It wasn’t until I reached the bottom, I felt JJ; place his hand on my hip in order to help me off when he wore this stunned expression. “ Sarah.” He mouthed, I knew he felt it; the blood that now covered his hand; I shook my head. “ Don’t say a word.” I had strength I’d be okay until I couldn’t walk anymore; He was about to say something when I hit him in the chest. 

John B would be in earshot; I couldn’t tell him yet; once we were in the clear I’d tell him, but I didn’t want him to worry about me, not after all the risks he took to save me. Pushing myself to the side, I eyed the small area where our feet hit the grass; Kie and Pope had to make it to the gates; where it led to the waterfront it was our get away. Our only glimmer of hope.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I promise. I’ll be right behind you. [I assured Sarah as I watched JJ go down the ladder first, to ensure it was safe for Sarah to follow. Once JJ gave the “all clear” signal, I gave Sarah and nod to begin descending the ladder] You’ll be okay. JJ will meet you at the bottom, and I won’t be far behind. [I reminded her as she started to descend the ladder. I ducked down lower to the roof as I heard the sound of more gunshots looming in the air. Once Sarah was about halfway down the ladder, I started to position myself onto the ladder; getting a good grip on the sides before I slowly began descending the ladder too. It wasn’t long before I could faintly hear Sarah and JJ safely at the bottom on the ground below the ladder, and I was following them moments later. After I reached the bottom, I noticed the concerned look JJ was giving me, but assuming it had something to do with the fact that we were all still in danger on the Cameron’s grounds, I didn’t question JJ on his strange look. Instead, I snaked my arm gently and protectively around Sarah’s shoulder; gently tugging her closer to me before speaking up in a hushed volume] Okay, we made it this far, which is great, but we’re not out of danger yet. Let’s get to Pope and Kie, and then all of us get the hell out of here. [I suggested before nodding my head toward JJ; gesturing for him to lead the way. The sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better our chances would be of us surviving this]

[ofnotakook]

He’d be right behind me. It was a sense of comfort knowing I wasn’t alone.That I was nearly to safety but the question lingered of how long. Because I felt the bleeding on my hip, I felt the lost of blood that peeled from my skin. Not that Sarah was about to utter a word. If she did their plan of escaping would be jeopardized. And JJ and John B had risked it all for her. Kie and Pope were on the lower ground taking cover on her behalf. Sarah wasn’t selfish; she knew when to take one for the team. Her dad; his shots that were fired. It was venages for her; for the Pogues brainwashing her; but the truth was Sarah saw beneath the scars. She saw the truth. The perfect knit family wasn’t real. She had hoped her father would be okay; that he would let her go. Let the pogues go give John B what was rightfully his. 

But instead he saw me as property. I wasn’t a person to him. I was his daughter yes; but I also was my own mind and heard. All that to say I tried not to shake when I heard the gunshots in the distance. I had my hands holding onto the ladder as JJ slowly helped me down. Blood it was obvious at the edge of the ladder; I easily shook my head to JJ; indicating John B didn’t need to know. I was fine. I Swore I caught an edge of concern against his expression. Did JJ care? I asked myself as feet hit the pavement; the edge of the roof as we lowered ourselves down to the ground. His arm was comfort; he was there with me every step of the way. 

Reaching up with my cleared hand; I intertwined my palm with his own. Above my shoulder as I forced a smile. “ almost there.” I whispered as i felt the throbbing on my side; the dripping of redness down my leg; I just hoped it was dark enough to hide. Enough to give us a clear out before I had to say the words. I was shot; a haunting thought as I saw Kie and Pope in sight. 

“ Once we step down one last step, run to the gates, there’s a boat waiting okay. I’ll get the keys.” I told myself it was a solid plan; despite my obvious discomfort to myself. I leaned up to press a kiss to John B’s hand lips against his thumb before I gave the nod to Kie and Pope. 

It was time to run; it was our only chance; even if it meant the Pogues leaving without me; I could handle my injury and my dad; but John B needed an escape or his life was at risk; and right now I cared less about me and more about his safety. “ Run.” Whispered as hands released his own as my body heavily dropped to the ground. Shots being fired; I leaned down enough to swat; to hide under until the walkway cleared.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I gave a nod of relief to Sarah and JJ once our feet finally hit the pavement below. Sure, I knew we still had a challenge ahead of us, even more of one now that Ward knew I had taken Sarah, so I guarantee he wasn’t the only one firing a gun currently. Now we had him, and his whole damn security department firing at us, too. Regardless, we made it this far, which to some, seemed like an impossible feat in and of itself, but we’re still alive, so that’s something. I justified optimistically as Sarah told us the next part of the plan. Good thing we managed to get her out, because JJ nor I had come up with an escape plan. In normal pogue fashion, we planned to wing it once we reached the point… You know, assuming that we made it this far, I should say] Okay, babe. [I said as I heard her instruct us to “run,” and then she released my hand. Given how close I had already come to losing her, I wasn’t about to let her out of my sight; especially in a dangerous situation like this. With that protective thought in mind, I hadn’t run far before realizing she was no longer at my side, or even behind me] Sarah? Sarah, where are you? [I asked in a hushed volume as I started to back track to find her. It didn’t take me long before I nearly tripped over her as she laid down onto the ground] What are you doing? Are you okay? [Assuming maybe she tripped and hurt herself or something, which is why she didn’t get up and continue running with us. Either way, I waited for the latest bout of gun shots to fade out before I helped Sarah up from the ground. This time snaking my arm around her to keep her close as we prepared to catch up with the others] Can you walk? [Prepared to carry her on my back if she was hurt and couldn’t run. Whatever it took to get Sarah safely out of here, I was all for doing it. Sarah’s safety and freedom was my top priority right now]

[ofnotakook]

A getaway plan; honestly Sarah could easily say she had the grounds of the priority mapped out in her head. But the times she’s visited this house she could count on her hand. It was slim; but right now she had to save herself or she risked the chance of Ward getting his hooks not just in her; but it put the pogues in danger. The same people who risked their lives in order to save her. Sarah didn’t take it for granted; she knew she was a mess. She was someone who was torn between love and her family. But she was locked in her own room on more than one occasion. Her father proved he only cared about the gold. It stung; it made Sarah feel like shit; like she wasn’t enough for her own father. 

But now wasn’t the time; the end was near. She felt her knees wobbly, she felt the lost of blood elevate against her frame. Feet planted against the pavement; her eyes scanned the grounds until they reached Kie and Poper who had keys in their hands; they found the keys to the boat under one of my rocks. It was kinda my getaway car back in the day when I wanted to be reckless; I wanted an escape; apparently it was my younger self telling me to be prepared. Because right now our best bet was to run. Run through the pavements; the mountains of trees to get to the edge. I whispered the words. JJ didn’t need any admission; he ran like hell while guns were being fired. Fired at us; which is why I ducked. Not voluntarily; I had fallen to my knees. I had fell right to the ground. I felt my lungs closing off; I felt the air in my body slowly leaving, as I felt my frame hit the ground in a huff. 

I knew John B; he’d never leave without me. I was kinda surprised he hadn’t picked up on the trail of blood I left on the roof; the ladder in my wake. But to my surprise my secret was that a secret. Eyes closed growing heavy that was until I felt his hands roll onto my own palms. Fingers curled around his hands as I slowly pushed myself back onto my feet. “ I’m okay.” A fat lie I screamed at myself. The dirty blonde moved in the threes; in the brushes; her sneakers ran across the lawn until she heard her feet against the pavement. “ John B.. If I fall behind I need you to run like hell okay.” A demand not an ask. The female whispered in a low tone as fingers tighten around his palm. “ I was shot..’ The words stuck on her tongue as she paused; glancing down to her hip; her hip where there was a big ass stain of redness under her sweater; the white sweater now red; she bit down on her lip in fear; and now she’d be the reason they got caught; from running for their lives. 

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what, I would never leave Sarah behind. She was everything to me. Including my favorite pain in the ass that I argued with like we were already a married couple. Point is, I loved Sarah more than life itself, and even though things were a bit up in the open currently between us, that didn’t matter, because I would always come for her. Case and point when I saw her drop down and without a second thought or hesitation, I went back for her and then waited until she was ready to move before we continued our escape. My face turned pale though as I could feel the blood leaving my cheeks when I heard her confession about being shot] What? You were shot? [Quietly repeating the words back to myself, as if trying to process it, but also hoping that I had heard her wrong and she’d correct me now. Judging by the blood I saw that had stained her shirt, I knew I hadn’t imagined it. My worst nightmare was happening now in the fact that Sarah was hurt] It’s going to be okay. I’ll get you out of here and then we’ll get you help. [I assured her. No way in hell of knowing if she was going to be okay or not. I mean, she was shot. With a bullet. She was bleeding, and I had no way of knowing how much blood she’s lost already, because I was just now hearing she was hurt] Let’s get you on my back, and I’ll carry you out of here. [My way of letting her know that, no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her behind, so this way, if we get caught, we’re going to do so together. I silently justified as I squatted down as low as I could, so Sarah didn’t have to strain too much to shift onto my back]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s family was the why the Pogue’s were in this mess. The why we were fighting for our life’s. Namely the finger needed to be pointed towards my father. The man who wanted to be a proud family man, adoring father was willing to aim guns at his own daughter. He chose a hell of a long time ago. I wasn’t the kook anymore; I was a pogue; the family I decided I wanted. My pure love and adoration for John B. He was my everything. The boy I wanted to bicker with day and night. The boy I wanted to run on adventures with. He understood me, I never felt alone with him; I never felt like I had to pretend. I always felt trapped, the need to run from how I felt those strong feelings until I met him. Until we kissed; and fell insanely in love. 

And this island; the gold being unreachable now; was on me. I was the one who believed in my dad; kept opening my mouth and claiming he loves me, he’d never hurt me. I was the fool a disgrace not only had my brother tried to kill me drown me, my own dad wanted me dead. I had nothing but John B and the pogue’s. They were all I needed. 

Each leg of movement was starting to cause a strain on my body. I had no issues running; it was the open wound on my abdomen that was preventing me from moving fast enough. Knees weak, I could barely keep up. I heard the others in a distant reach the boat; the boat that was gassed up; the keys I knew where they were hidden the backup keys I mean. I remembered going out on this boat as a child; for our family trips on the ocean. What an embarrassing moment now considering. Leaning over my frame; eyes staring at the grass that touched my ankles. Head moving to stare between my legs in order to catch my panting breaths. I felt weak, I said the words. And I swore I heard John B stop; he paused in disbelief but the writing was pooling down my legs; the droplets of blood obvious. Tilting my head up I bit down on my lower lip to hold in the whine the pain of my wound. “ John B..” Name lingered on my tongue as tried to find the how I’d get this boy to leave without me. Instead he decided to bend down to the ground. I hesitated, I didn’t want to hold him back. “ I..” I started but I also know this boy; he’d risk it all for me. It didn’t make sense for both of us to risk being caught here, but with last minute thinking I pulled myself onto his back. Arms wrapped loosely around his neck. Legs wrapping around his waist, once I was safely on his back I rested my head on his shoulder. “ You can move now..” I echoed in a nearly teasing retort. Keep it light; until we escaped. 

A death trap of my own making.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what happened, I would never leave Sarah behind. I wasn’t stupid. I knew us breaking into her family’s compound tonight to break her out was a death trap. It was a fool’s errand, but I didn’t care. Sarah was in danger. She might not see how deranged her father and brother are, but I knew. I saw first-hand what her psychotic father was capable of, so I wouldn’t put anything past him now. Including him hurting his own daughter just to ensure he kept her far away from me. The man was a damn lunatic and the sooner I got Sarah away from him, the better off she’d be. The driving reason I broke into her room tonight. Well, “prison” was probably a more fitting word given the bars her father had put on her windows, so she could be kept there as his prisoner. Asshole. I thought in disdain as we ran toward some semblance of safety. I stopped though when I realized Sarah was no longer behind me. Panic setting in since it was dark, which made it difficult to see. Following the sounds of her breaths and rustling through the grass as I back-tracked back toward her. Shock and fear washing over me in hearing she had been shot. A part of me wondering if taking her back to her father was the best course of action, since his ties and pull could have a doctor here in moments. Still, something told me she wouldn’t want to go back there. She’d choose to take the risk to keep moving] I’ve got you. Don’t worry. I’d never leave without you, Sarah. [I assuredly whispered out as I helped her get situated safely on my back; ensuring her arms were wrapped tightly around my neck and her legs secured around my waist before I started through the trees and such in search of JJ and the others] “John B? Where the hell are you?” [I heard the familiar sound of JJ’s voice airing out nearby in a hushed tone. Moving in the direction of his voice, I eventually caught up with them. Keeping Sarah securely on my back as we reached them] “Ready for the next part of the plan? The diversion?” [JJ asked with pride in his voice, which prompted a skeptical look from me. All of us knowing JJ wasn’t the best at plans, but I did feel better when Pope and Kie chimed in to share that they had actually helped with this part of the plan] If it gets us out of here, then hell yeah, do it! [I muttered out as I watched JJ throw a lit flare in the direction of the wooded area we had all just escaped from, before throwing two others in separate directions of the same wooded area. Listening and watching as I saw a small explosion go off, followed by another, and then countless more. Pope and Kie explaining they rigged those while they were waiting for us to break Sarah out. Chuckling in pride and feeling a momentary sense of victory as I realized we temporarily stopped Ward’s guards from catching up; prompting us to continue running the remaining way off of the compounds and then into the city. Now it was just a matter of finding a place to hide out and to get Sarah medical attention] Sarah was shot, so we need to get her to a doctor before we do anything else. [I explained to the others; watching the wheels practically turning in their head on how to work this one out without all of us ending up getting caught]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s greatest fear was her friends, was the boy she loved getting hurt on her behalf. She always believed in the good in her father; that he had made mistakes. But when it came to their family he always held their best interest at heart. But all the evidence was staked against him. He faked his own death; he was okay with putting his arms around my neck. He was okay with shooting a bullet not knowing where it land. And Sarah was caught in that crossfire. She was scared that her now slow pace would hurt the pogues in the end. Her new Family. And she knew better than to fight with John B, than to plead with him to keep going without her. He’d never leave her behind. He was noble, he was the man that loved her more than his own life. 

And she’d risk it all for him too. He was the light in her new darkness. Sarah tried to hide it; the trail of blood she now kept behind her. She held the wound to her hip as tightly as she could; until she fell. She fell forward breathing heavily feeling the impact of loss blood. She was trying to move forward in the deep grass; but her feet stopped. She had hoped the male had moved far enough forward to forget; about her. But his voice was like a compass calling her home. And she had to smile to herself as she pulled herself onto his back. Bitting down on her lip knowing she was in pain; that pain in her side, the pool of blood that was now hitting his shirt. Head slowly came to rest on his shoulder; weakness inside of her. “ I know..” She whispered in a weakened tone. She held on for dear life; she had her arms wrapped around his neck, and her legs slid around his waist; a sense of safety; as we neared the spot where the others were. 

The night was dark; no one noticed her pale face; the weaken state she was in. Another phase to the plan? Her eyes trailed over to the smirks of her friends; the explosions that they had in fact thrown in the direction of each guard growing on their tails. A small smirk tugged at her lips. Severs Ward right, to come for family; and you get burned. The others glanced at her; as the elephant in the room was exposed. She was shot; weak; blood pooling out of her as she spoke. “ I’m fine.” She said as she rested her head back down on his shoulder. She vaguely heard JJ make a plan. “ We run into town. There’s abandoned buildings, maybe we find a doctor office on our way.” It wasn’t settle or optimistic in any form; but maybe if we found supplies; I could stitch up my own wound. I had no desire to see a doctor again; nor could we trust any person wouldn’t go running to Ward. So I had barely said a word; leaving the decision up to John B; he was the fighter; the leader in this mess. I’d trust him; I’d follow him anywhere.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I nodded in response to JJ’s suggestion. No offense to my best friend, or anything, but when he came up with plans, they usually crashed and burned. Then again, his idea to break Sarah out wasn’t his worst plan. Mind you, she did get shot as a result of the escape, but I don’t know if I can necessarily blame JJ’s plan for that, or just pin the blame on Ward for being a deranged and psychotic piece of shit] I think heading toward the town is a good idea, but Sarah definitely needs a doctor. Kai, you still have the fake IDs we had made up for all of us, right? [Kai nodded in response while flashing me a confused look] Okay, so if we go to a doctor’s office or hospital, we can use the fake IDs, so Sarah’s identity doesn’t get back to her father. Either way, we need to get the bullet out of Sarah, and get her stitched up. That’s our first priority once we get off of this property. [I explained. Knowing Sarah was getting weaker from the blood loss, so the sooner we got her gunshot wound tended to, the more at ease I would feel that she’s going to be okay. Honestly, at this point in time, my only concern was Sarah. I kept that thought to myself though, because I knew if I startled to unravel with worry, everyone else would begin unraveling too. Bottom line, we weren’t going to make it out of this situation alive if we didn’t remain level headed and make the right decisions]

[ofnotakook]

Right decisions; was it ever in our nature? To be smart, to not lead on impulse? In the short time Sarah spend with John B and the pogues, she’s learned JJ and John B tended to make decisions on a whim. They tended to come up with a plan and without thinking ran with it. Granted it Sarah owed her life to the poges, she owed the idea that she was released from the bars of her own bedroom due to them. And she appreciated the fact given the limbo state the male and myself were tethered into that they risked it all for me. The wrath from my dad; the Camerons’s who I was learning spelled terrible news. Sarah always believed in her dad; the type of man he was. He was kind, he cared about his family wanted to provide for us. But the money the power it gave a person it tended to steamroll you into a horrible person. Sarah couldn’t believe her eyes; the lengths her dad was willing to go, harming his own daughter, embedding Rafe despite his own crimes. She felt disgusted with her own family. The blonde knew where she belonged; where her heart was. Holding onto dear life to the man she currently had her arms wrapped around. 

The blonde let nimble fingers graze over the thin layer of his shirt; the weak grip she held. Her wound was obvious, the blood pooling down her leg. Ward got her damn good. And Sarah hated her fate was on the edge of a line. Doctors wasn’t an option, she knew this island. She knew Ward was probably on a warpath now for blood. Pogues won by letting my escape happen, and now he’d be paying off any source he could, to get his hands on me. 

The female listened despite her own body was fading, head rested upon his head; the comfort of his scent, she was always safe with him. Eyes blinked open and closed, and she slowly let her weaken vision take in the pogue’s who glanced in every direction Smoke of the explosion was all in the air, intoxicating. “ Go South, we get on the boat, and port half way down the island, there’s a hidden office, our best bets is escaping this house.” A thought for food; a hidden doctors office; one that may get me home sailing. 

Without the risk of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised that, in spite of her condition, Sarah was the one to air out the best and most sensible plan. Giving a nod in response as I looked toward JJ and the others] You heard her. Head south. [I said in agreement as I continued carrying Sarah on my back as we all made route south toward the docks. Knowing our risk was still higher than not of getting caught, but she was right… If we had a chance of getting out of here and to freedom, this was the one with the best odds. More than anything though, I just wanted to get her somewhere safe, so she could get some medical attention. I could hear by how weak her voice was that she was losing a lot of blood. The longer this continues, the worse her chances of survival were. Once we reached the docks, we ducked into the shadows until reaching the boat. I made sure to get Sarah on safely, and then I laid her down across one of the seats to rest, while I helped JJ and Pope to untie the ropes; all the while Kai started up the boat. Knowing we’d all need to work together, and to do so quickly, or else we weren’t getting out of here alive] Okay, Kai, we’re clear. Get us the hell out of here. [I called out to her as me and the other guys pushed the boat away from the dock to give it an oomph and then once the boat was cleared from the sides, I returned to Sarah] How bad is it? [I asked as I grabbed the first aid kit stowed under the one seat. Not that I could do much with my incredibly limited experience and knowledge, but I felt helpless by not doing what I could for her now. Besides, if I could at least slow the bleeding, that would give her the best fighting chance to stay alive until we were able to get her medical attention]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt like she had lost everything. She used to be the girl who would always go to the beck and call of her dad; he used to be the incredible man she grew up with. He used to be the man who read bedtime stories to her. He used to give her a glass of milk each time. She had so many fond memories of him. But now; it felt like those memories were tainted. Sarah had always believed in him, she fought the urges to go against him. Seeing his boat explode it destroyed her; she broke up with John B the man she loved for him, because he was glad the man who took his father away got justice. Was dead. And suddenly it felt like our love wasn’t meant to be. 

And now Sarah was bleeding out because of the man who was supposed to protect her. He shot fire at her; at her friends not caring of the consequences. That was the sadness of the reality. That I was alone. I couldn’t turn to my sister, I couldn’t protect. I had to put myself first, and that was the pogues my made family. We lift each other up, we go to bat for each other. And I knew the high stakes. I knew what my father was capable of. I had to wonder how I had any ounce of love for him after what he’s done. Lying to protect Rafe, letting my brother get away with attempting to drown me, he let me get drugged. He’d rather put harm to me than take accountability. And I had to swallow that truth. With a heavy head I felt like my vision was becoming blur as I spurred the last task at hand. Hands loosen on the grip against John B’s shirt, as my eyes drifted shut. How long had we walked? Before I heard the rustling of feet hitting the docks. And I felt my body being dropped gently into the boat, back pressed against a hard backing on the edge. Slowly eyes lifted seeing blurs. 

Figures moving left and right; the “ Ropes done.” I heard from JJ as both boys plopped themselves down on the boat. Pope was at the wheel with Kie, I heard the soft whispers of nothingness. And I heard his voice, the one that always dragged me home. And I wanted to be honest, as my hand slowly nimbly moved against the dam fabric of my sweater as I lifted it up. And I saw it the blood, it was dark, and it explained why I felt faint. Turning my eyes to the man I loved; John B was preparing to bandage up the wound for a short time. “ It doesn’t look pretty, I’ll have a nasty scar if anything.” I aired out attempting to lighten the mood as I felt the boat move as if it was full of lighten. 

This remembered me of when I saved his ass, when we first started out; on our little adventure. A shy grin turned against my lips as I spoke. “ Last time one of us had to bandage the other up, I was sneaking you into the house, I saved your ass, are we finally repaying the favor?” I asked with a sense of teasing in my voice. Definitely not the time, but I needed a laugh a small brief moment for just us.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Although I knew now wasn’t the time for jokes and quips, I still appreciated the fact that Sarah was trying to keep the mood light between us. Maybe if the circumstances had been reversed, I would have been all for cracking jokes… Hell, I would more than likely be cracking them too. Given that Sarah had been shot and was rapidly losing blood though, I definitely wasn’t in a fun and games kind of mindset. For her sake though, I did flash her a grin as I leaned down to press a tender kiss to her forehead] Well, I figured I owed you so it was high time I stepped up and returned the favor. Maybe next time you want me to save you though, let’s go with something that involves less blood shed and need for panic… Deal? [Giving it my best effort to joke in return. In the meantime I grabbed the first aid kit. My hand shaking slightly as I quickly fished around for some bandaging and things I thought I could use to stop the bleeding] Either way, I’m putting you in charge of keeping an eye on me to make sure I’m doing this right. I mean, doctor stuff is new territory for me so I’ll need the supervision. All that to say, eyes open at all times, okay? [My casual way of requesting to Sarah that I wanted her to keep her eyes open. Afraid that if she closed them and fell asleep, I might lose her. A thought that I couldn’t bear to consider as I started to do what I could to apply pressure to her wound and then applied some gauze and then bandaging too, all in an effort to stop the significant bleeding she was currently experiencing]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was well aware of the bleeding that now wasn’t the time for her humor, for her need to crack a joke open. But Sarah could see how scared he was; it was in his eyes. She was scared herself that she was about to take her last breath, by the hands of her own father. Ward had no idea she was assuming that he had aimed for her; she had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. Her own father pulled the trigger; he was aiming a weapon at her friends, at the man she loved. And now she was facing deaths door; she remembered the last time. 

John B was the one aching in pain as she ran her fingers with a cold rag over his blooded wound; which is why the dirty blonde showed amusement. Or she was going nuts with the lack of blood in her system. Eyes had slowed movement as he spoke; and she knew this was his way of saying “ Stop Sarah.” As if she planned on taking a bullet tonight. But her smile soften knowing feeling the panic under his tone, and her slimmed hand; her hand reached to touch his arm as a soothing of reassurance that she was okay. “ I promise next time, I’ll tell my dad not to shoot.” She echoed with that sarcastic retort of hers. But Sarah was done with the jokes. Not that she had the energy. She felt like her body was giving out; she felt the color had now drained from her face in the dark. She barely felt the boat moving against the water; the ocean seas; the seas that used to bring soothing. That used to make her feel safe; and now she was trembling, she felt his hand on her wound; and she had glanced down the blood was soaking her skin, right through his hand. “ Use the guse to wipe around the wound, and then bandage it gently at least until we arrive.” To a doctor; assuming we had the money to get me treated; or this was the end. Her eyes landed back on his features, and she uttered an “ I love you.” As if it was the last words she’d say. 

Eyes kept fluttering open and shut in a daze, despite the promise to stay with him, to guide him through the process; she hardly felt her hand move down to her side; as if her limbs were jelly now. If only this boat would move any faster..

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I appreciated Sarah’s attempt to crack jokes now. That was kinda our thing, you could say, but at the moment, I felt far from laughing. I was worried and growing even more so with every passing second. Sarah was shot. She was bleeding out currently, and I had no way of knowing if we’d get her medical attention in time to save her] Speed up the boat! Let’s go! [I yelled out to Pope and Kie as I saw Sarah’s eyes close. Judging by the worried look on JJ’s face, I knew he was thinking the same thing I was] Hurry the hell up, JJ, and help me pack her wound. Quick, get those gauze pads from the bag! [My voice shaking in building worry as JJ did as I ordered; grabbing me what I needed as I tossed the now soiled and blood soaked gauze pads to the side as I took the clean ones from JJ’s grasp. My hand shaking as I pressed it against Sarah’s gunshot wound. After what felt like a damn eternity, the boat pulled to a stop. I didn’t exactly know where we were at the moment, but at this point Pope and Kie were tying off the boat to the pier, so it wouldn’t go anywhere, and then they rushed toward us] “Come on. I got word that there’s a surgeon in town who handles cases like this for the right price.” [Pope explained which prompted my brows to furrow in confusion] “Get Sarah, let’s go.” [Kie instructed, which prompted me to tape off the currently gauzed padding I had in place, then JJ helped me to lift Sarah carefully out of the boat and onto the pier. Once JJ and I were on the pier, I cradled Sarah securely in my arms] “Here, take this bag. It should be enough to get her treated. Pope and I will stay with the boat.” [Kie said as JJ grabbed the bag and the address of the warehouse doctor, and then we rushed through the dark night air toward the provided address. A less than ideal situation from all angles given Sarah’s condition and the fact that we were in an unfamiliar place looking for the location of a doctor that we knew nothing about. Talk about a wild card move, at its best] Stay with me, Sarah. We’re going to get you help. Keep fighting. [I called out to her as JJ barked out instructions and I merely kept up with his pace as I carried Sarah in my arms toward our destination]

[ofnotakook]

A scar that might kill me. 

It was a thought for Sarah; she felt like she’d been through the ringer. Her own family was willing to sacrifice her for their own benefits. Sarah once thought the world of her father; of the family. But now she knew the truth they only craved the wealth they’d stomp on anyone who dared to stand in their way. Sarah’s own brother tried to drown her, and now her father was the one who pulled the trigger. Obviously he was aiming for John B, but Sarah knew she’d always end up in the cross fire. 

Not that she cared, she’d rather die than live without him. The words she said that night; on the smaller boat, as John B fought for his life, to escape the death sentence. And I meant it; I loved John B and yeah we fought; we ended up screaming at each other. But i’d do anything to be with him, and now as I was fighting for my own life; I only hoped the pogues survived. Sarah was falling unconscious, she had felt her body shutting off. The last words she spoke were of love, an undenying world of love for him. But she felt the blood lost. She felt her wounds becoming fetel. And she heard the urgent, the eagerness in her man’s voice as she felt the vague packing of her wound. How long had it been? 

She had no idea, because she felt darkness overcome her. She felt like she was falling into limo. She barely felt John B and JJ as they wrapped her sim arms around their shoulders and held her up. Enough to look like Sarah was walking, but she was dragged towards the clinic, and she barely heard the exchange when the surgeon called the three up. And with each step, she felt a slight ache in her body. An ache she wanted to subside. But Sarach knew she had to fight; to live, to open her eyes again. She felt her frame fall to a bedding; as her head hung down as the surgeon whispered. “ It’ll be okay, fight.” And She fel the breathing tube come to her nose, she felt the bleeding that was exposed. The doctor mumbled a few words to her friends. “ Do you have the money? She may not live.” He uttered and I felt my body weak. My own shadow breathing as my eyes slowly woke, for a second to see the unfamiliar surroundings, the walls brown. The tubes connected to me, I was scared. But I couldn’t move before my eyes went shut all over again. 

The doctor took the money and he soon took a tool; to save me, if it did any good, because right now I felt like I was on the brink of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

“Yeah, man. Here.” [JJ aired out in response to the shifty doctor’s request for money, before handing him a bag with money in it. My eyes shifted into a roll watching the doctor count it. So much for a moral code to save a life. Apparently all this asshole cared about what money] Just save her. Please. [I aired out pleadingly as I held Sarah’s hand with my one hand; all the while gently stroking back the hair from her face with my free hand. After a moment or so the doctor seemed satisfied with the amount of money JJ gave him inside that bag, and then he began. Watching as he first put Sarah under with what I assumed to be some kind of anesthesia before he grabbed a questionable looking scalpel so he could begin making the first cut. I knew in my gut that trusting this doctor might be the worst idea we’ve ever had, but at the same point, our hands were tied. It was either this option or we’d lose Sarah. Sure, his “she may not live” statement didn’t leave me with much confidence in his skills, but I had to believe in Sarah now. Sarah was strong. She was brave. If anyone could fight this, it was her] Come on, baby. Fight this. Don’t you dare leave me. Fight, baby. Fight. [I gently pleaded in her ear before pressing a tender kiss to her forehead] “Keep watch.” [I heard the doctor instruct of JJ before giving me a knowing sort of look and then a nod] “Here we go.” [The doctor said in less than a confident tone as he made the first cut; taking the scalpel across Sarah’s skin in order to remove the bullet from her body. It was excruciating to watch, but I promised myself that no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her side] “Grab those gauze pads and some gloves. Pour some of that vial with sanitizing solution directly over the incision spot and then place the gauze pads firmly across the area to slow her bleeding. We don’t want her losing more blood than she already has.” [The doctor instructed; forcing me to release Sarah’s hand, so I could assist in the surgery. After what felt like an eternity, he finished; managing to remove the bullet and then to seemingly successfully repair damage to her wounded organ internally. Once he finished, he stitched her up then covered the wound with a significant amount of gauze pads and medical tape] “It’s a wait and see, at this point, so let’s hope she’s a fighter.” [The doctor said while washing his hands in the sink in the corner of the room] She is. [I flatly said in response before removing my gloves and washing my own hands once the doctor had finished. After ensuring my hands were clean, I returned to the table where Sarah rested and I took her hand in my own] You’re a fighter, Sarah. The strongest person I know, so fight this. I’m not going anywhere. [I had no way of knowing if she could hear me, but I didn’t care. On the off chance that she could, I was going to remind her of her strength and ability to fight this now]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt the screams into darkness. She felt like she was on a cloud in limo. She had no control of her body; she felt like she was paralyzed. She didn’t have the power to move, she barely felt her body being held up. She didn’t want to die, she didn’t want to be traped in her own bedroom. She never asked her own father to shoot bullets at her and her friends. Sarah suddenly felt like her once simply life was a cycle of nightmares. Death on our door steps, the rush of running; being on the med. Sarah knew her getting shot was her fault. If she had just listened to John B weeks ago; that Ward didn’t have my best interest at heart. 

If I had stayed with Pogues instead of trusting my now psychic family. One trying to kill me left and right. Sarah had learned her lesson, the only people she could count on was herself, the pogues, even her sister she just hoped her sister was okay. She knew she was stipid to be thinking about anyone but herself now. But she held sympathy for others. The aching in her body was enough to force her to scream in pain if she wasn’t knocked out. She vaguely heard the way her body gently was placed down on a mental table.  I vaguely felt John B his breath in my ear as he tried to reassure me I was okay, I was a fighter. I was in my own little bubble. The darkness in my lids, the way my body was lifeless, especially as the doctor did insert his tool into my body, if I was awake I’d be screaming. I barely felt it; probably from the anesthesia. I couldn’t move, I had no idea how long I was out. I could vaguely hear the voices as the doctor echoed out it would be touch and go. Would I be surviving? Was I still bleeding out? Sarah felt the stirs in her mind as she laid still. Baby, fight.. Words echoed in my ears. 

John B, he needed me, he needed me to be strong, to fight through the blood lost. I couldn’t let him down. I was groggy when I suddenly felt the strength to open my eyes. The small light above me it flashed my eyes forcing me to squit, and I felt John B’s head on my stomach, not on the wounded skin, but right under. I was aching as I let out a soft wine. My hand pale as I lowered my hand onto his dirty brown locks, fingers slowly combed through his hair. “ John B.” I echoed in a whisper; I couldn’t speak and I noticed JJ was sitting in the chair, eyes closed, even JJ stayed. A made family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Hours passed by and there was no change. Sarah was so still and I had no way of knowing if she’d ever wake up. The doctor didn’t sound hopeful. Made a snide remark about her chances of pulled through as he greedily took our money and then ran like hell like some kind of coward. Clearly it was all about money for him. As more time passed, I found my head resting against Sarah’s side. Near her incision but not close enough to cause any further damage. I just wanted and needed to be close to her now. JJ wasn’t far away. He took a look out to make sure Ward nor any of his men were nearby before he’d return to the private room here and take a seat in the chair adjacent from where Sarah and I rested now. I didn’t know how much more time had passed… Felt like an eternity even though I knew it was probably just a few more hours, but eventually I heard the faint sound of her voice, as well as felt her fingers rustle gingerly through my hair. At that my head immediately shot up and I looked at her. Relief flooding my face and expression currently] You’re awake! Thank God! [I uttered out in evident relief as I pressed a gentle kiss to the back of her hand] How are you feeling? The black market doctor left a few things for pain if you need it. [The guy wasn’t exactly reliable but he did seem to save Sarah’s life, so at the moment, I was thinking a bit more favorably of him. Maybe he wasn’t a total money-hungry quack after all. Jury was still out on that one though] Do you want some water? [I asked as I had already picked up a fresh bottle of water; prepared to give her some if she was thirsty]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt weak, she ha no idea as to how long she’d been laying her. The memory of her father; of how easily he had aimed a gun at her, at her friends because of what? Jealousy? Because he wanted to hold this wild control over her? Sarah had once desired to please her family. She had once idolize her father the memory of us at the docks when I was only a little girl it clouded who I knew he was. 

But a few hours before he was so willing to throw me under the bus. He was so willing to let me bleed out on our yard. Because of his hate for the Pogues. I was hurt, I was feeling betrayed but at the same time, relieved as I felt my body come to life. I felt my eyes lift open as I adjusted to the dim light. I saw JJ in the corner as my eyes peeled over to John B who had his head rested against my palm. And I knew I was lucky, he was here. He loved me, and I had to let my fingers run soothingly through his dirty blonde locks. A small smile peeled at my lips. And I knew I couldn’t move. I felt numb to my core as my body was now healing from the blood lost, Sarah wasn’t going to jump up, the fear of Ward on our tail was aching against my own skin. The blonde had peered up at him; the man she loved so much. 

“ I’m okay.” As okay as I was going to be. The wound had been deep, the stitched up wound was felt as my eyes slowly moved to the man I loved. My hand moved to reach for John B. And I felt a sigh of relief escape my own lips. And I felt my gaze linger on him. “ I’m sorry, I’m sorry my dad is a crazy,” My words could never compare to the pain my family has caused him, the pogues and I wanted to do my part to mend those fences. “ Yes.” I echoed to the option of water my throat felt dry but I wasn’t going to jump forward, I slowly lifted my head up to get to a sitting position. My free hand had moved to my side, knowing the pain; the wound my own family caused.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I felt mounds of relief when I heard Sarah’s voice. She was alive. She was awake, and she was speaking. Lifting her hand to my lips as I pressed a couple of kisses to the back of her hand, then gently lowered her hand back down onto the metal table she was lying on] Hey, don’t apologize. It’s not your fault. All that matters is keeping you safe and away from your deranged family. [No matter what, I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t let Ward harm Sarah again. I thought to myself as I brought a fresh bottle of water to Sarah’s lips, so she could drink as much as she wanted and needed. I knew she needed time to rest and heal, but the sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better I could guarantee her safety from her family. One could hope, at least. I mean the way Ward operated, and the fact that he knew people all over the world, I wasn’t sure exactly how far remote we would need to go, and for how long either for that matter, in order to keep Sarah safe, but no matter what, I’d do what it takes. I came close to losing Sarah this time… Too close for comfort, so I wasn’t willing to take any chances with her safety again. At least not until Ward was no longer a threat to her] Once you’re well enough, we’re going to get you out of here. Pope and Kie are keeping an eye on the boat, and when you’re strong enough, we’re all getting on that boat, and getting as far away as possible. We figure with some distance and preferably some place off the grid, eventually your father will stop looking for you. [Maybe wishful thinking since Ward wasn’t one who took well to losing, but one could hope he’d eventually give up and accept that Sarah was gone]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah kept asking herself the obvious how she’d been blind. How she was capable of still holding a torch of love for her family. With all the crimes all the ways her own brother tried to murder her; sending drug mules her way, being the one that nearly drowned her to death. And now her own father; was so mad at the Pogues so terrified of losing his daughter to the pogues; not wanting to lose the fight that he aimed and shot me. The blood that once covered her fingertips, the blood the redness that ran over her sweater, it was an image Sarah couldn’t erase.  

Her friends, her boyfriend? Cut into the crossfires because of her fucked up  family. And even now as she opened her eyes; said a few words, she felt the aching on her wound, damn that stitch is gonna hurt like hell. But it was comforting to feel his touch, to witness his lips touching her knuckles once again. John B, he was her anchor that kept her whole. A soften expression; a smile curled at the corners of her lips as she saviored his touch; his lips against her skin. “  They drugged me, they forced me here. I feel trapped like no one is safe in that house, but my sister..”  A fear for the little Cameron it rocked me whole now, as I felt the lump forming in my throat. Wheezie she was innocent had no idea who’s roof she was living under. Like myself; I’d been blinded from the truth. But now my father was deranged; he passed off onto Rafe; and Rose was clueless as ever a pond in the game; until she crossed Ward. 

A slight cough was heard; as the blonde felt the wetness hit her tongue, one sip of water turned into half the bottle until she released the top from her lips and she slowly sat herself up, her palms hitting the metal of the table to hold herself up. Nuts insane considering her own wounds she wore. But her eyes ran along John B’s features with ease. “ You know he won’t let that happen. He blames you the pogues for his princess no longer being in his care. I’m a game for him to win..” A sad truth, an ached formed in her chest now.  “ I wouldn’t blame you if you allowed the pogues to leave me here for  dust to get away. I don’t want to bring you down, or put you and pogues in danger..” Not again the words hid  at the tips of her tongue. 

Danger; our names, but Ward he’d kill to end the war..I was terrified the lengths he’d go no matter how safe I felt with John B; he’d get hurt because of me. A pill I needed to swallow now.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, that would never happen. [I flatly replied with a matter of fact sort of shrug. Sure, I knew if this was just about Sarah, maybe JJ and the others would have high-tailed it out of here. Not necessarily Pope since he had a heart to do the right thing, but Kie was what you could say, hot and cold toward Sarah, so it wouldn’t take much for her to bail on Sarah. And well, JJ hated Kooks in general, so he had no loyalties to Sarah either. Thing was though, they all knew I’d literally die to protect Sarah, and the Pogues would always put their lives on the line to protect each other. All that to say, as long as I was staying put at Sarah’s side, the Pogues wouldn’t be going anywhere either because they’d always have my back, just like I’d always have theirs too. We fought fiercely for each other] Even if the others decided to high-tail it out of here, I’d never leave your side. Unless you tell me to go, I’m not going anywhere… [I started to say before an amused smirk followed] And even then, I can’t promise I’d actually leave. You know I’m stubborn when people try to tell me what to do. [I teased even though that was the truth] Either way, once you’re well enough, we’re all getting the hell out of here, and getting to safety together. Until then, just rest and heal. [I said as I gave her hand another gentle squeeze. My way of reassuring her that we were all in this together; no matter what the outcome]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah knew her choices  as of late not only disappointed herself but those around her. Sarah never wanted the wealth, she never wanted to be accepted as the princess Kook. That title had been given to her. People made assumptions about her; her personality; how she followed the kook business, and yes once upon a time she was a kook. Bu from that one day running around with John B at chapel Hill, helping him seek answers to a quest she had no idea how over our heads we were. We were just kids running around aimlessly. But I saw that treasure hunting look in his eyes; the way his eyes lit up at a map, and I mused, I admired who John B. And he made me want more for myself. 

One day; one rain kiss on the docks was all it took for the dirty blonde to feel hooked. He’s who she loved, and even with death upon us; my dad probably having a search squad on our heads. I had let the pogues down; when I had let John B go, I was angry, I was sad when I thought my dad died, and john B was just so glad to see him fall through the cracks. My dad was money hungry, he was awful he killed, he allowed Rafe to get away with Murder, but he was my dad; but now as I groggily came out of my unconscious state; I remembered the cage I felt locked in. I recalled his aim, the gun shot wound that should’ve killed me. My own father aimed the trigger, and right now Sarah knew in her gut she was a pogue, and she appreciated the friendships she made. Eyes glanced over for comfort to the boy that made her heart race. And her pinky found his; a trace of her finger against his own. 

“ I made that mistake once, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for letting you go John B, I was..” Pausing briefly before a sigh could be heard escaping her lips. “ I was hurting, I didn’t want to believe my dad was this monster. I know you said you’ve always got me, but I wouldn’t blame you if you decided no one chances.” Chances to love me, to be together after this horror war my dad had, all the times guns aimed at us because of him, a war he wanted to win on behalf of me. One he already lost. 

Because my heart; who I was, it was a pogue; my known family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I get it, Sarah. Before I came into your life and opened your eyes to who your dad and brother really are, you had a really tight bond with your dad. Naturally you’d want to fight to protect his reputation. It only makes sense that you wouldn’t want to believe your dad was capable of something like that. If the situation was reversed, and it was me in your shoes, I probably would have done the same thing as you. [I admitted honestly. It was the truth. If this was my dad, I would have fought to protect his reputation too. It’s what you do for the people you love. I’d do it for Sarah and the pogues too because I consider them my family. No matter what, I’d always have their backs, just like I know the pogues would have mine] You’ll never run out of chances with me, Sarah. I hate to break it to you, but I love you, so until you say otherwise, you’re stuck with me. [As much truth as there was in my words, I aired out that honesty with a joking tone] Anyway, for now, we just need to get your strong enough that we can move somewhere safer for the duration of your recovery. [I knew where we were would suffice for now, but it would only be a matter of time before Sarah’s dad figures out we’re hiding out here currently. We’d cross that bridge if and when the time comes. For now I wanted Sarah to get a little stronger and heal up a bit before we decide to move her]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah had always been privileged growing up. She knew of the different layers of the island. She never wanted to believe in herself to judge others; the living, how some had to work harder than others. But Sarah was guilty to pulling away when it felt messy and difficult. When someone got too close to her; she was the one guilty of running. The fear of being seen truly. It’s what happened with her friendship with Kie, and it was easy to blame the split on how John B reacted to her father’s then death. But the truth was Sarah was scared. 

Scared of letting go of the shielded life she lived, the ground beneath her gone. Her family shattered into pieces. Her dad wasn’t the man she once admired. He was a monster; he felt threatened he knew I wasn’t under the spell, and he tried to hurt me. My own brother tried to kill me, did I feel safe with my family? No I was shot because of my dad, and now I felt the numbness against my skin. The numbness that tingled the layer of my stomach; where the scars stood. I wouldn’t blame John B if he wanted to cut loses here, and leave me stranded. But I knew him his heart; the good boy inside of him; the boy I loved with every fiber inside of me. “ It’s not about him anymore. I knew who he was; he wasn’t the dad I once laughed with on the beach when I was a little girl, he knew he lied, he knew what he did, and my brother is protecting him. I’m sorry for the pain my family caused you.” The pogues hanging onto my lips. 

Hearing the words; unlimited chances hung in the air. I love you; and I loved him, I wouldn’t let the male get away from me again. Sarah tried her best to master the pain, the smile heated against brims as her hand grasped hold of his fingers. “ I love you.” words spoken as the blonde attempted to sit up using the strength of her elbows to hold her upper frame upright. But she knew staying put wasn’t an option; Ward had his minions surroundings areas; I would gasp through the pain than get caught. An intense stare hinted into my features as I spoke. “ John B.. we have to move. I can handle the pain. This island isn’t safe not with my dad, he has people..” And I knew Ward; he wanted power; to hold an angle, and us staying still didn’t feel safe; for me or the pogues.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I knew Sara was right… We had to move sooner rather than later. We were basically sitting ducks here. Ward had this whole island in his pocket, so it would only be a matter of time before he got wind of the fact that we were here. I’ll be damned if I did all this work to break Sara out of there… And then to get her the help she needed after she got shot, just for that deranged idiot to take her back to the prison he had her encamped in] Okay, if you’re sure you can handle it, we’ll move. [Worried if she busts a stitch she may bleed out though] We need to take it slow though. Be smart about this. We can’t afford you busting any stitches. If you bleed out… [I trailed off. Not even able to finish off the thought of that possibility] Let me tell JJ we’re going to move. [I said as I pressed a kiss to Sara’s forehead; letting my lips linger there for a second or two before I broke away. It was almost like I didn’t want to let her out of my sight; fearful I’d lose her] Be right back. [I promised as I briefly and reluctantly left the table she was resting on in order to find JJ, who was keeping watch just outside] We’re moving. We need to get off of this island. Alert the others. [JJ agreed; immediately pulling out his phone to message the others to get the boat ready for our momentary departure. In seeing JJ got the ball rolling on that, I returned to Sara. Preparing to move her once she gave me the okay. I still felt unsettled about us leaving, but at least night had set in, so that would give us the advantage as we used the darkness, shadows, and any alleyways we could find to our advantage] Just tell me when, and I’ll help you off the table.

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was embarrassed of who her family was now. It used to be a loving home, used to be a place of safety. The countless family dinners outside on the docks by the grills. The countless boat rides we had. The loving embraces from her dad; he used to be a home for her. And now when she thought about Ward all she felt was anger, betrayal. Someone who only cared about greed, he went out of his way to coverup a death, to frame John B, and now he even if it was an accident he shot me. I was stitched up because of him. All that to say; I didn’t want to be stuck on this island for one more minute. I was on edge, my hand touching the bandaged wound, as I felt the pain. We’re sitting ducks; Ward had his minions all over the island; it was possible he’d be hunting me down. This was a lowkey office; and I doubted this bystander of a doctor was on the payroll. 

I was aching, I didn’t want the drugs, but I also had to put the pogues first; John B first. They came to Nassau for her, Sarah didn’t care if she was limbing in pain whimpering as she sped up to walk as long as we ended up on that boat and made our way back to OBX a home, a new safety. We’d find a way to the gold; our rightful place of earnings. Sarah could see the concern written on John B’s face now, but she was okay. A smile of reassurance coming from her now. She laid kept on the metal table now, as she nodded, biting down on her lower lip to hold out on any pain. “ I promise, slow and steady wins the race.” I added with a joke, Sarah found her more humours side with him. The touch of his lips on her forehead, it made her insides turn, the butterflies now. Sarah had waited until John B had stepped outside to inform JJ before she was able to slowly sit back up. Damn the shooting pain that ran up her side. Deep breaths, Sarah was about to move to step down from the table when she heard her boyfriend, A soft brave smile came to her lips. Reaching out her hand to grasp hold of his arm for support. “ We need to move. I’m ready.” Her stitching may not be; but I could rest once we got safety; but until the docks came into view the dirty blonde wouldn’t feel at ease. 

An unsettling feeling at the pit of her stomach.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised the second I offered my help to Sarah once she was ready, she didn’t hesitate to take my hand. Anybody else would be feeling sorry for themselves and their situation, but not Sarah. She was a total bad ass. By far, the bravest person I knew. Thing was though, I hated moving her. She nearly bled out and died after being shot. Her stitches were the only thing keeping her from doing so now, so what she needed more than anything was to rest and heal. Problem was, her deranged father and his entourage of employees that would be on the look out for us. I didn’t like having to move her from here, but it was either this, or get caught by her father’s people. Neither outcome was ideal, which was why I left the final choice up to Sarah. Her answer clear as day when she held out her hand and took a hold of my arm for support] I can carry you. I’ll do the whole slow and steady thing… Taking your word on the winning the race part you joked about. [Flashing her an amused grin. Knowing now wasn’t the time for fun and jokes, but maybe we both needed a little light humor given the shitty circumstances we were facing. I silently told myself as I helped her off the metal table she was lying across and then kept a secure hold on her until she was steady on her feet] You good? [Needing to know she was okay before I made any further movements or plans]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah should’ve been more hesitant to move. Given the amount of stitches her body had to have, the amount of blood she had lost from that gunshot. The one that came from her father. Sarah if she had too much time to dwell on it would start feeling useless a burden to her own family. Because one her dad was willing to lie for Rafe, yet the innocent child like myself was left to scrape by. Pick a side, and my heart was with the pogues, with John B. And my brother was a bit deranged now, but I suppose father like son, Rafe had to get that attitude from somewhere didn’t he? 

I fought the urge to roll my eyes now. As I found that strength to lift my body up to sit and reach my feet the white tennis shoes to the ground. And I did and felt that aching pain on my lower abdomen. Where the stitches were, and as John B came to view I wore a gentle smile as I reached to brace myself for the pain as I put the weight on my feet. Fingers wrapping around his forearm you felt his muscles now as I found my courage to fully stand. “ I don’t want to make it harder for you to run, I’ll try to keep up.” A promise to my heart, but if John B and the others got hung up because of me I’d never forgive myself. The pogues were in a tough spot because of me. And I hated it, I’d rather bleed out on that table than for them to get caught. All that to say, my hand slid into his bigger palm with a squeeze. “ I’m ready, let’s meet the others.” Conviction in my tone as with an easy step started towards the exit doors; to leave, before my dad found us, before we felt in hot waters.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, I don’t want to run the risk of you popping one of your stitches and bleeding out, so we’ll take it slow and steady. Hell, if we have to crawl there to keep your safe, then so be it. [Mind you I didn’t expect either of us to crawl, obviously, but I was just trying to prove a point now. No matter what risk came to me, Sarah’s safety and well-being would always be my top focus. I silently thought to myself as I gave her hand a gentle squeeze] I’m good carrying you if that will be easier and less painful than you having to walk. [Fortunately the pier wasn’t far from here, but the problem was, we couldn’t exactly walk right down main street to get there since Sarah’s father, no doubt, had people out there looking for us. Nah, we needed to take the most discreet way possible in order to keep ourselves from getting noticed before we reach the boat that would hopefully get us the hell out of there] JJ’s right outside waiting for us… He’s already figured out a plan with the best route we should take to get to the pier where the boat’s waiting for us. [I explained as I securely and protectively held her close to me as she got on her feet; giving her a nod in reply as she gave the “okay” that she was ready] Walking or do you want me to carry you? [Knowing Sarah had an independent side to her so I figured I’d leave the decision up to her]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was fierce and strong. She felt the harbor of why us Pogues were on the run now. It was due to my father. Who had once been the apple of my eye, once been a dependable man. Once been someone I counted on, but he was the one who shot that aim. And landed me fighting for my life. Sarah was scared not that she’d say the words. She was scared of popping her own stitches now. Scared of taking a last breath. And John B he was by my side; he was a good person, even if I got angry with him from time to time. 

“ I’m okay.” An insistent of words. I’m fine. I definitely felt the wound, I felt that skin split when I stood up onto my feet. But i figured if i said the words long enough they’d be true. Sarah was a fighter; she tended to jump into the line of fire without care. And in this case; the pier wasn’t far, her idea of the island she knew it from the back of her head now. And Sarah wanted to be a leader; she wanted to feel empowered to get us pogues out of this mess. And as she stood to her feet; she nodded with a smile, genuine and sweet for him, as her hand laced through his own. “ Okay, but are we sure JJ’s plan is the best? He tends to have outcomes that come knocking on his door..” A grossome expression on her features now, as her hand made its way to his arm, as she prepared to jump on his back. “ I would love to walk John B, but my stitches, my pain level is a 10 right now, so carrying me is best..” Assuming the offer stood. I knew John B he wanted me to be comfortable. 

I was independent by nature, I had my own strength but even I felt that lower pain each time I moved, pick battles and right now I just wanted to be off my feet, and in his arms. A smile a batting of eyes now as I slowly hopped on his back legs wrapped around his waist to prepare for our trip, to the docks, to our ride home.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Eh... [I shrugged slightly in response to her question about JJ's plan. It was a fair question. JJ was one of my best and most trusted friends, so I'd have his back no matter what, but with that aside, even I couldn't deny that his track record with his plans working out wasn't the best. In fact, they failed more often than not. This time around, it seemed like our only option, so even if the odds weren't necessarily in our favor, we had to give it our best shot] It's not a great plan, but unfortunately our only option currently. [I confessed. Knowing I couldn't ever lie to Sarah] In his defense, this seems to be one of his better and more thought out plans, so fingers crossed. [No, that answer wasn't ideal, or even all that convincing, but again, I couldn't lie to Sarah. That's how I felt, so it was a run like hell and hope for the best type of plan right now] Okay, I've got you. No matter what. [I assured Sarah as I carefully lifted her up from the floor and into my more than capable arms; cradling her protectively close to me as we cautiously exited the warehouse, met up with JJ who was keeping watch for us right around the corner, and then we started toward the dark alleyways and vacant roadways in an effort to go as unnoticed as possible as we raced like hell toward the boat where the rest of our friend group was waiting]

[ofnotakook]

I can always trust in you

@apogueforlife 

I can always trust in you 

Trust; it had to be earned. Love; it had to be developed. For Sarah she always had her guard up. Each time she’d get close to letting someone in the other shoe would drop, she’d freeze up, and run in the other direction. With each boyfriend she ever had she had the urge to run. To distant herself when she felt like she was trapped. When she felt the pressure to feel more than what she did. Topper he liked the idea of her. He loved the idea of being with her; but he wasn’t in love with her. 

There’s only one boy Sarah loved; and that was John B. It happened unexpectedly. It happened on a day she never saw coming. That day stayed with her. The day we went to chapel hill; the day we had fun dressing each other up. The day we pretended to be our alter egos; Val and Vlad. It was nice to be herself. I didn’t feel the pressure to be perfect. I didn’t feel like my family was watching me, I was myself. I felt safe, I felt like John B saw me despite all the flaws I had. He loved me for me, and I loved him. It was a roller coaster of a relationship if you asked me. We had gone from barely knowing each other; to falling completely utterly in love. I gave up my kook card for him. I knew the obsluces we’d be facing now, the pogue’s vs the kook. But nothing made me question my loyalty to him. To the Pogues. It got messy with my dad; him being the reason Big John was gone. The reason why the gold was taken. The reason I was on the run with John B. The gold felt so close yet so far. We managed to clear John B’s name but that’s because Ward decided in his best interest to fake his own death and act like the hero. The guy that claimed to have been a killer in order to protect his own son. Rafe just the thought of being near him made me sick to my stomach. For a second I was upset, I felt like my whole body ached when I witnessed the boat blow up. When I witnessed my father shatter beyond the sea. And that’s when I saw the truth; what led to us being torn apart; what led to John B and I no longer being together. He had been happy to ward dead; and I couldn’t exactly find the words to blame him. He took everything from him. But at the end of the day; he was my dad. I was hurting and I remembered that look all too well; the look of proudnessI felt like I was seeing another person. I was grieving the dad I once looked up to, to the dad that I was once his princess. I needed John B to hold me, to make me feel like it was always going to be okay. But it suddenly felt like us it wasn’t meant to be.. 

Walking away for yourself; was all you could do. It was hard to be near him; to be pulled back into the adventure; to the cross. But for Pope I’d be there; awkwardness assured. Sarah didn’t know if she should make eye contact with him; or just stay silent. Silence seemed better; until that night; we had a plan to get the cross from Rafe; the big truck was parked outside my house. JJ and Pope were hidden behind the bushes. I was determined to walk inside; to get the key to unlock the truck; how we’d get the heavy cross out was a big ass story of it’s own. But I had made two steps to the gates, one glance backwards; I saw him John B was about to get up; and for a second I found myself hopeful; maybe this was the moment of the unknown. What comes next? Dark hues met for a second and I swore the air was taken out of my lungs; but he didn’t budge, didn’t move. Giving me the indication we had nothing left to say. That was the last memory I had of him; of us staring at each other. 

Head leaned against the gated up windows of my room at the barbados house, The house I was locked into. The boat felt like a nightmare; I was drugged by my own family. Rose had put a drug in my tea. Rafe and had helped her execute the plan; to force me here against my will. I remembered telling Ward when he claimed John B only cared about the treasure about the gold that I was just stuck in the cross hair that he was wrong. That John b would find him and come for him once I went missing. How wrong had I been? I wanted to blink back the tears that dared to fall. I was a pogue at heart; I chose it for John B because I loved him, despite our differences he’d always have a permanent place in my heart. It had been weeks since we left on the boat, I had tried to zone out the conversations of my parents; I had pretended to be sleeping at times, but here once I had been pulled into my room I never left. I guess Ward was afraid I’d run, or threaten to tell the cops his own daughter was kidnapped against her will. Give or take. Sarah swallowed the lump in her throat; it had gotten dark. She smelt the tray of food that her sister left her outside the door. Her bed was an inch away; The light pink covers still in place, it had been a day or two since we arrived, and I had slept in my bed because that meant i was okay, that meant that I was adjusting to being here; in this house. When all I wanted was to break free. At the window, on the seat where my back was pressed against the wall. Head tilted towards the window, I could see the water; any boats that passed by. I was alone; and all I could hope was that the Pogue’s were okay that perhaps my dad was right they managed to get the cross and that’s all that mattered for Pope. Eyes moved to the stars; for a moment it was nice to believe we were looking at the same stars; as if John B was on his way; assuming my dad was lying. For now all I could do was hold hope; I’d find a way out; it was a done deal. 

Tomorrow; I’d work out a plan. The Pogues would have me, if I found him. We’d always have each other. A wistful thought as a hint of a smile tainted onto my lips.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Love. Definitely not something I ever believe really existed. I always saw it more as, in life, people come and go. The ones who matter will stick with you, through thick and thin. For me, that was the Pogues: JJ, Kie, and Pope. I don’t remember a time in my life when those three weren’t part of it, and something tells me, I’ll never shake them either. Not that I’d want to, cause they’re everything to me. Then Sarah Cameron busted into my life unexpectedly… One of those surprising moments where I got myself in a sticky situation, and Sarah Cameron, of all people, was the one who bailed me out of it. Even more surprising though was how I felt when I was with her. It was the first time in my life when I found myself wanting to be with a girl exclusively. In time she even made me rethink my original theory about love. Then, well, I guess you could say life happened, and we broke up. Sure, I knew I played a part in our break up. When her father died, I should have been more supportive of the toll that loss would take on Sarah. Yeah, the guy was bad news… A lying crook, which Sarah obviously knew too, but he was still her father. Given the bad blood I had with Ward, and also the fact that he murdered my father, could you really blame me for being relieved that the guy was finally gone? Right or wrong, it’s how I felt. This leading to the end of Sarah’s and my relationship. Still, in my heart I knew this wasn’t the end for us. A love like ours always finds a way back to one another. Naïve or not, I refused to see it any other way…

Then weeks passed and I was starting to wonder if it really had been the end for us. Mind you, I still wasn’t giving up, but instead of dwelling on what may or may not happen between me and Sarah, instead the Pogues and I focused on getting the cross back for Pope. It actually became a, “Kill two birds with one stone” type of adventure for us though, since word got to me that Sarah had been abducted by her family. Them ultimately boarding a ship with Sarah and the cross, allegedly heading to Barbados; knowing that was exactly where we would be going to. This was it… This was our chance to, not only help Pope get the cross back, but also for me to rescue Sarah too…

Given that us Pogues had made some enemies, and also the fact that we didn’t have so much as a pot to piss in, much less money to travel to Barbados, it took some work, a lot of time, and even more creativity on our parts before we finally reached Barbados. Once we did, I knew we needed to devise a plan to get back both Sarah and the cross. Of course JJ, as usual, came up with one of the worst plans I had ever heard. This saying a lot considering JJ’s had some really shitty plans, over the years. This one pretty much topped the other bad plans he’s had though; prompting all of us to shoot down his plan and come up with another one. Knowing it was either come up with a better plan, or go with JJ’s plan which will likely either get us all killed, or at the very least, we’ll end up locked up in some jail cell. In time we did come up with a new plan. Not a great one, but definitely better than JJ’s plan, so it was something, at least. For our part we decided one step at a time…

We’d wait till night, rescue Sarah first, and then once we had her safely out of that house and away from her deranged family, we’d devise a plan to get the cross back. I mean, it’s not like we could just knock on the front door, and request either. Not without being shot, that is. We couldn’t even break in and steal the cross without getting caught, since it was so damn heavy, it was going to take a hell of a lot of brute strength to carry it, so we’d just deal with that plan later. For now, my focus was on Sarah. Sure, I knew there was a chance I’d be the last person she’d want to see tonight, but given me and the Pogue’s rescuing her, or her remaining a hostage with her own family, I figured I was the lesser of the evils, so to speak. I justified as Kie and Pope remained look outs from the ground; keeping hidden to the garden area where they tried to remain unseen, while JJ and I went to the roof. With JJ’s help, he hoisted me down onto the balcony I had scoped out and learned led to the bedroom they were keeping Sarah locked in. Once I approached the balcony window, I peaked inside discreetly; making sure her family was nowhere in sight before I gave a couple of light taps on the window. My way of alerting Sarah that I was here. Of course the window was pad-locked, which just pissed me off more. How could they do this to Sarah? The Cameron’s definition of family was nothing more than a load of bullshit, if you ask me, because this isn’t how you treat family. I thought in building anger as I used the pin I had with me to trigger the lock. Once I heard it click, my eyes shifted up toward JJ. The thumbs up he gave me in reply assuring me he had cut the security system like he confidently told me he could easily handle. This was JJ, so although I’d trust him with my life, and well, I had a few times, I still held my breath as I slowly and gingerly opened the window; expelling a quiet sigh of relief when an alarm didn’t sound as I opened the window] Val…? [I quietly whispered her code name into the dark bedroom. Hoping it would soften any resentment she might have in seeing me here now] Vlad and the crew are here to spring you from here… [I further whispered into the dark bedroom as I waited for her to come over to the window; knowing we didn’t have long before someone would alert the Cameron’s that the security system had been hacked into, so the sooner we got out of there, the better our chances of getting out of here alive]

[ofnotakook]

The pogue plans never went according to plan. Not that Sarah was going to complain now considering. She was able to escape the bars that locked her into her old bedroom. She was tired of starving herself out of spite. She was tired of laying awake at night in fear that she might be dragged out of bed. She was tired of being forced to live the perfect life. Forced to smile for her parents; the only one in her family she liked was her sister Wheezie, she’s who I wanted to protect. But she had young opinions, didn’t see what our family was capable of. And given how much risk John B went through to find me, I had to go with him. Not that I wanted to stay trapped or that I’d risk his life to save my sister. 

I felt torn with myself now. I escaped; I was on the roof; I had survived the lies, I had survived my own father aiming a gun at me; of course to his unknown knowledge Ward did exceed in his aiming and catching fire on one of us. I doubted his attention was to hurt me. Yet again it felt like a toss up considering, he did try to strangle me to death; and drugged me to get onto that stupid boat. But I knew him to know the problem wasn’t my stubbornness, it was John B and the pogues. He was threatened, and right now the Camerons wasn’t my family; it was the pogues. I had chose them a long time ago weather I wanted to admit it or not. 

Safe; is what I felt; despite the pain that was pooling on my side; the white sweater was making it difficult to hide. But I felt his kiss; the graze of his lips on my head, a tenderness of who we were. A love language for us. Seeing as JJ had followed my lead; and started down the ladder; I had stepped forward turning my back to where my hues fell on the male I loved with all my heart. Despite our differences that did come to light when I uttered the words maybe we weren’t meant to be, to work out. 

A soulfulness in my stare as I uttered my words. “ Promise you’ll come down.” I mouthed the words “ I can’t lose you.” As my palm wasn’t already filled with my own blood. Taking my hand from side, I placed them firmly on the handles of the ladder, with one step and than the next. I caught sight of the droplets of blood hitting the ladder as I climbed down, It wasn’t until I reached the bottom, I felt JJ; place his hand on my hip in order to help me off when he wore this stunned expression. “ Sarah.” He mouthed, I knew he felt it; the blood that now covered his hand; I shook my head. “ Don’t say a word.” I had strength I’d be okay until I couldn’t walk anymore; He was about to say something when I hit him in the chest. 

John B would be in earshot; I couldn’t tell him yet; once we were in the clear I’d tell him, but I didn’t want him to worry about me, not after all the risks he took to save me. Pushing myself to the side, I eyed the small area where our feet hit the grass; Kie and Pope had to make it to the gates; where it led to the waterfront it was our get away. Our only glimmer of hope.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I promise. I’ll be right behind you. [I assured Sarah as I watched JJ go down the ladder first, to ensure it was safe for Sarah to follow. Once JJ gave the “all clear” signal, I gave Sarah and nod to begin descending the ladder] You’ll be okay. JJ will meet you at the bottom, and I won’t be far behind. [I reminded her as she started to descend the ladder. I ducked down lower to the roof as I heard the sound of more gunshots looming in the air. Once Sarah was about halfway down the ladder, I started to position myself onto the ladder; getting a good grip on the sides before I slowly began descending the ladder too. It wasn’t long before I could faintly hear Sarah and JJ safely at the bottom on the ground below the ladder, and I was following them moments later. After I reached the bottom, I noticed the concerned look JJ was giving me, but assuming it had something to do with the fact that we were all still in danger on the Cameron’s grounds, I didn’t question JJ on his strange look. Instead, I snaked my arm gently and protectively around Sarah’s shoulder; gently tugging her closer to me before speaking up in a hushed volume] Okay, we made it this far, which is great, but we’re not out of danger yet. Let’s get to Pope and Kie, and then all of us get the hell out of here. [I suggested before nodding my head toward JJ; gesturing for him to lead the way. The sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better our chances would be of us surviving this]

[ofnotakook]

He’d be right behind me. It was a sense of comfort knowing I wasn’t alone.That I was nearly to safety but the question lingered of how long. Because I felt the bleeding on my hip, I felt the lost of blood that peeled from my skin. Not that Sarah was about to utter a word. If she did their plan of escaping would be jeopardized. And JJ and John B had risked it all for her. Kie and Pope were on the lower ground taking cover on her behalf. Sarah wasn’t selfish; she knew when to take one for the team. Her dad; his shots that were fired. It was venages for her; for the Pogues brainwashing her; but the truth was Sarah saw beneath the scars. She saw the truth. The perfect knit family wasn’t real. She had hoped her father would be okay; that he would let her go. Let the pogues go give John B what was rightfully his. 

But instead he saw me as property. I wasn’t a person to him. I was his daughter yes; but I also was my own mind and heard. All that to say I tried not to shake when I heard the gunshots in the distance. I had my hands holding onto the ladder as JJ slowly helped me down. Blood it was obvious at the edge of the ladder; I easily shook my head to JJ; indicating John B didn’t need to know. I was fine. I Swore I caught an edge of concern against his expression. Did JJ care? I asked myself as feet hit the pavement; the edge of the roof as we lowered ourselves down to the ground. His arm was comfort; he was there with me every step of the way. 

Reaching up with my cleared hand; I intertwined my palm with his own. Above my shoulder as I forced a smile. “ almost there.” I whispered as i felt the throbbing on my side; the dripping of redness down my leg; I just hoped it was dark enough to hide. Enough to give us a clear out before I had to say the words. I was shot; a haunting thought as I saw Kie and Pope in sight. 

“ Once we step down one last step, run to the gates, there’s a boat waiting okay. I’ll get the keys.” I told myself it was a solid plan; despite my obvious discomfort to myself. I leaned up to press a kiss to John B’s hand lips against his thumb before I gave the nod to Kie and Pope. 

It was time to run; it was our only chance; even if it meant the Pogues leaving without me; I could handle my injury and my dad; but John B needed an escape or his life was at risk; and right now I cared less about me and more about his safety. “ Run.” Whispered as hands released his own as my body heavily dropped to the ground. Shots being fired; I leaned down enough to swat; to hide under until the walkway cleared.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I gave a nod of relief to Sarah and JJ once our feet finally hit the pavement below. Sure, I knew we still had a challenge ahead of us, even more of one now that Ward knew I had taken Sarah, so I guarantee he wasn’t the only one firing a gun currently. Now we had him, and his whole damn security department firing at us, too. Regardless, we made it this far, which to some, seemed like an impossible feat in and of itself, but we’re still alive, so that’s something. I justified optimistically as Sarah told us the next part of the plan. Good thing we managed to get her out, because JJ nor I had come up with an escape plan. In normal pogue fashion, we planned to wing it once we reached the point… You know, assuming that we made it this far, I should say] Okay, babe. [I said as I heard her instruct us to “run,” and then she released my hand. Given how close I had already come to losing her, I wasn’t about to let her out of my sight; especially in a dangerous situation like this. With that protective thought in mind, I hadn’t run far before realizing she was no longer at my side, or even behind me] Sarah? Sarah, where are you? [I asked in a hushed volume as I started to back track to find her. It didn’t take me long before I nearly tripped over her as she laid down onto the ground] What are you doing? Are you okay? [Assuming maybe she tripped and hurt herself or something, which is why she didn’t get up and continue running with us. Either way, I waited for the latest bout of gun shots to fade out before I helped Sarah up from the ground. This time snaking my arm around her to keep her close as we prepared to catch up with the others] Can you walk? [Prepared to carry her on my back if she was hurt and couldn’t run. Whatever it took to get Sarah safely out of here, I was all for doing it. Sarah’s safety and freedom was my top priority right now]

[ofnotakook]

A getaway plan; honestly Sarah could easily say she had the grounds of the priority mapped out in her head. But the times she’s visited this house she could count on her hand. It was slim; but right now she had to save herself or she risked the chance of Ward getting his hooks not just in her; but it put the pogues in danger. The same people who risked their lives in order to save her. Sarah didn’t take it for granted; she knew she was a mess. She was someone who was torn between love and her family. But she was locked in her own room on more than one occasion. Her father proved he only cared about the gold. It stung; it made Sarah feel like shit; like she wasn’t enough for her own father. 

But now wasn’t the time; the end was near. She felt her knees wobbly, she felt the lost of blood elevate against her frame. Feet planted against the pavement; her eyes scanned the grounds until they reached Kie and Poper who had keys in their hands; they found the keys to the boat under one of my rocks. It was kinda my getaway car back in the day when I wanted to be reckless; I wanted an escape; apparently it was my younger self telling me to be prepared. Because right now our best bet was to run. Run through the pavements; the mountains of trees to get to the edge. I whispered the words. JJ didn’t need any admission; he ran like hell while guns were being fired. Fired at us; which is why I ducked. Not voluntarily; I had fallen to my knees. I had fell right to the ground. I felt my lungs closing off; I felt the air in my body slowly leaving, as I felt my frame hit the ground in a huff. 

I knew John B; he’d never leave without me. I was kinda surprised he hadn’t picked up on the trail of blood I left on the roof; the ladder in my wake. But to my surprise my secret was that a secret. Eyes closed growing heavy that was until I felt his hands roll onto my own palms. Fingers curled around his hands as I slowly pushed myself back onto my feet. “ I’m okay.” A fat lie I screamed at myself. The dirty blonde moved in the threes; in the brushes; her sneakers ran across the lawn until she heard her feet against the pavement. “ John B.. If I fall behind I need you to run like hell okay.” A demand not an ask. The female whispered in a low tone as fingers tighten around his palm. “ I was shot..’ The words stuck on her tongue as she paused; glancing down to her hip; her hip where there was a big ass stain of redness under her sweater; the white sweater now red; she bit down on her lip in fear; and now she’d be the reason they got caught; from running for their lives. 

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what, I would never leave Sarah behind. She was everything to me. Including my favorite pain in the ass that I argued with like we were already a married couple. Point is, I loved Sarah more than life itself, and even though things were a bit up in the open currently between us, that didn’t matter, because I would always come for her. Case and point when I saw her drop down and without a second thought or hesitation, I went back for her and then waited until she was ready to move before we continued our escape. My face turned pale though as I could feel the blood leaving my cheeks when I heard her confession about being shot] What? You were shot? [Quietly repeating the words back to myself, as if trying to process it, but also hoping that I had heard her wrong and she’d correct me now. Judging by the blood I saw that had stained her shirt, I knew I hadn’t imagined it. My worst nightmare was happening now in the fact that Sarah was hurt] It’s going to be okay. I’ll get you out of here and then we’ll get you help. [I assured her. No way in hell of knowing if she was going to be okay or not. I mean, she was shot. With a bullet. She was bleeding, and I had no way of knowing how much blood she’s lost already, because I was just now hearing she was hurt] Let’s get you on my back, and I’ll carry you out of here. [My way of letting her know that, no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her behind, so this way, if we get caught, we’re going to do so together. I silently justified as I squatted down as low as I could, so Sarah didn’t have to strain too much to shift onto my back]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s family was the why the Pogue’s were in this mess. The why we were fighting for our life’s. Namely the finger needed to be pointed towards my father. The man who wanted to be a proud family man, adoring father was willing to aim guns at his own daughter. He chose a hell of a long time ago. I wasn’t the kook anymore; I was a pogue; the family I decided I wanted. My pure love and adoration for John B. He was my everything. The boy I wanted to bicker with day and night. The boy I wanted to run on adventures with. He understood me, I never felt alone with him; I never felt like I had to pretend. I always felt trapped, the need to run from how I felt those strong feelings until I met him. Until we kissed; and fell insanely in love. 

And this island; the gold being unreachable now; was on me. I was the one who believed in my dad; kept opening my mouth and claiming he loves me, he’d never hurt me. I was the fool a disgrace not only had my brother tried to kill me drown me, my own dad wanted me dead. I had nothing but John B and the pogue’s. They were all I needed. 

Each leg of movement was starting to cause a strain on my body. I had no issues running; it was the open wound on my abdomen that was preventing me from moving fast enough. Knees weak, I could barely keep up. I heard the others in a distant reach the boat; the boat that was gassed up; the keys I knew where they were hidden the backup keys I mean. I remembered going out on this boat as a child; for our family trips on the ocean. What an embarrassing moment now considering. Leaning over my frame; eyes staring at the grass that touched my ankles. Head moving to stare between my legs in order to catch my panting breaths. I felt weak, I said the words. And I swore I heard John B stop; he paused in disbelief but the writing was pooling down my legs; the droplets of blood obvious. Tilting my head up I bit down on my lower lip to hold in the whine the pain of my wound. “ John B..” Name lingered on my tongue as tried to find the how I’d get this boy to leave without me. Instead he decided to bend down to the ground. I hesitated, I didn’t want to hold him back. “ I..” I started but I also know this boy; he’d risk it all for me. It didn’t make sense for both of us to risk being caught here, but with last minute thinking I pulled myself onto his back. Arms wrapped loosely around his neck. Legs wrapping around his waist, once I was safely on his back I rested my head on his shoulder. “ You can move now..” I echoed in a nearly teasing retort. Keep it light; until we escaped. 

A death trap of my own making.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what happened, I would never leave Sarah behind. I wasn’t stupid. I knew us breaking into her family’s compound tonight to break her out was a death trap. It was a fool’s errand, but I didn’t care. Sarah was in danger. She might not see how deranged her father and brother are, but I knew. I saw first-hand what her psychotic father was capable of, so I wouldn’t put anything past him now. Including him hurting his own daughter just to ensure he kept her far away from me. The man was a damn lunatic and the sooner I got Sarah away from him, the better off she’d be. The driving reason I broke into her room tonight. Well, “prison” was probably a more fitting word given the bars her father had put on her windows, so she could be kept there as his prisoner. Asshole. I thought in disdain as we ran toward some semblance of safety. I stopped though when I realized Sarah was no longer behind me. Panic setting in since it was dark, which made it difficult to see. Following the sounds of her breaths and rustling through the grass as I back-tracked back toward her. Shock and fear washing over me in hearing she had been shot. A part of me wondering if taking her back to her father was the best course of action, since his ties and pull could have a doctor here in moments. Still, something told me she wouldn’t want to go back there. She’d choose to take the risk to keep moving] I’ve got you. Don’t worry. I’d never leave without you, Sarah. [I assuredly whispered out as I helped her get situated safely on my back; ensuring her arms were wrapped tightly around my neck and her legs secured around my waist before I started through the trees and such in search of JJ and the others] “John B? Where the hell are you?” [I heard the familiar sound of JJ’s voice airing out nearby in a hushed tone. Moving in the direction of his voice, I eventually caught up with them. Keeping Sarah securely on my back as we reached them] “Ready for the next part of the plan? The diversion?” [JJ asked with pride in his voice, which prompted a skeptical look from me. All of us knowing JJ wasn’t the best at plans, but I did feel better when Pope and Kie chimed in to share that they had actually helped with this part of the plan] If it gets us out of here, then hell yeah, do it! [I muttered out as I watched JJ throw a lit flare in the direction of the wooded area we had all just escaped from, before throwing two others in separate directions of the same wooded area. Listening and watching as I saw a small explosion go off, followed by another, and then countless more. Pope and Kie explaining they rigged those while they were waiting for us to break Sarah out. Chuckling in pride and feeling a momentary sense of victory as I realized we temporarily stopped Ward’s guards from catching up; prompting us to continue running the remaining way off of the compounds and then into the city. Now it was just a matter of finding a place to hide out and to get Sarah medical attention] Sarah was shot, so we need to get her to a doctor before we do anything else. [I explained to the others; watching the wheels practically turning in their head on how to work this one out without all of us ending up getting caught]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s greatest fear was her friends, was the boy she loved getting hurt on her behalf. She always believed in the good in her father; that he had made mistakes. But when it came to their family he always held their best interest at heart. But all the evidence was staked against him. He faked his own death; he was okay with putting his arms around my neck. He was okay with shooting a bullet not knowing where it land. And Sarah was caught in that crossfire. She was scared that her now slow pace would hurt the pogues in the end. Her new Family. And she knew better than to fight with John B, than to plead with him to keep going without her. He’d never leave her behind. He was noble, he was the man that loved her more than his own life. 

And she’d risk it all for him too. He was the light in her new darkness. Sarah tried to hide it; the trail of blood she now kept behind her. She held the wound to her hip as tightly as she could; until she fell. She fell forward breathing heavily feeling the impact of loss blood. She was trying to move forward in the deep grass; but her feet stopped. She had hoped the male had moved far enough forward to forget; about her. But his voice was like a compass calling her home. And she had to smile to herself as she pulled herself onto his back. Bitting down on her lip knowing she was in pain; that pain in her side, the pool of blood that was now hitting his shirt. Head slowly came to rest on his shoulder; weakness inside of her. “ I know..” She whispered in a weakened tone. She held on for dear life; she had her arms wrapped around his neck, and her legs slid around his waist; a sense of safety; as we neared the spot where the others were. 

The night was dark; no one noticed her pale face; the weaken state she was in. Another phase to the plan? Her eyes trailed over to the smirks of her friends; the explosions that they had in fact thrown in the direction of each guard growing on their tails. A small smirk tugged at her lips. Severs Ward right, to come for family; and you get burned. The others glanced at her; as the elephant in the room was exposed. She was shot; weak; blood pooling out of her as she spoke. “ I’m fine.” She said as she rested her head back down on his shoulder. She vaguely heard JJ make a plan. “ We run into town. There’s abandoned buildings, maybe we find a doctor office on our way.” It wasn’t settle or optimistic in any form; but maybe if we found supplies; I could stitch up my own wound. I had no desire to see a doctor again; nor could we trust any person wouldn’t go running to Ward. So I had barely said a word; leaving the decision up to John B; he was the fighter; the leader in this mess. I’d trust him; I’d follow him anywhere.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I nodded in response to JJ’s suggestion. No offense to my best friend, or anything, but when he came up with plans, they usually crashed and burned. Then again, his idea to break Sarah out wasn’t his worst plan. Mind you, she did get shot as a result of the escape, but I don’t know if I can necessarily blame JJ’s plan for that, or just pin the blame on Ward for being a deranged and psychotic piece of shit] I think heading toward the town is a good idea, but Sarah definitely needs a doctor. Kai, you still have the fake IDs we had made up for all of us, right? [Kai nodded in response while flashing me a confused look] Okay, so if we go to a doctor’s office or hospital, we can use the fake IDs, so Sarah’s identity doesn’t get back to her father. Either way, we need to get the bullet out of Sarah, and get her stitched up. That’s our first priority once we get off of this property. [I explained. Knowing Sarah was getting weaker from the blood loss, so the sooner we got her gunshot wound tended to, the more at ease I would feel that she’s going to be okay. Honestly, at this point in time, my only concern was Sarah. I kept that thought to myself though, because I knew if I startled to unravel with worry, everyone else would begin unraveling too. Bottom line, we weren’t going to make it out of this situation alive if we didn’t remain level headed and make the right decisions]

[ofnotakook]

Right decisions; was it ever in our nature? To be smart, to not lead on impulse? In the short time Sarah spend with John B and the pogues, she’s learned JJ and John B tended to make decisions on a whim. They tended to come up with a plan and without thinking ran with it. Granted it Sarah owed her life to the poges, she owed the idea that she was released from the bars of her own bedroom due to them. And she appreciated the fact given the limbo state the male and myself were tethered into that they risked it all for me. The wrath from my dad; the Camerons’s who I was learning spelled terrible news. Sarah always believed in her dad; the type of man he was. He was kind, he cared about his family wanted to provide for us. But the money the power it gave a person it tended to steamroll you into a horrible person. Sarah couldn’t believe her eyes; the lengths her dad was willing to go, harming his own daughter, embedding Rafe despite his own crimes. She felt disgusted with her own family. The blonde knew where she belonged; where her heart was. Holding onto dear life to the man she currently had her arms wrapped around. 

The blonde let nimble fingers graze over the thin layer of his shirt; the weak grip she held. Her wound was obvious, the blood pooling down her leg. Ward got her damn good. And Sarah hated her fate was on the edge of a line. Doctors wasn’t an option, she knew this island. She knew Ward was probably on a warpath now for blood. Pogues won by letting my escape happen, and now he’d be paying off any source he could, to get his hands on me. 

The female listened despite her own body was fading, head rested upon his head; the comfort of his scent, she was always safe with him. Eyes blinked open and closed, and she slowly let her weaken vision take in the pogue’s who glanced in every direction Smoke of the explosion was all in the air, intoxicating. “ Go South, we get on the boat, and port half way down the island, there’s a hidden office, our best bets is escaping this house.” A thought for food; a hidden doctors office; one that may get me home sailing. 

Without the risk of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised that, in spite of her condition, Sarah was the one to air out the best and most sensible plan. Giving a nod in response as I looked toward JJ and the others] You heard her. Head south. [I said in agreement as I continued carrying Sarah on my back as we all made route south toward the docks. Knowing our risk was still higher than not of getting caught, but she was right… If we had a chance of getting out of here and to freedom, this was the one with the best odds. More than anything though, I just wanted to get her somewhere safe, so she could get some medical attention. I could hear by how weak her voice was that she was losing a lot of blood. The longer this continues, the worse her chances of survival were. Once we reached the docks, we ducked into the shadows until reaching the boat. I made sure to get Sarah on safely, and then I laid her down across one of the seats to rest, while I helped JJ and Pope to untie the ropes; all the while Kai started up the boat. Knowing we’d all need to work together, and to do so quickly, or else we weren’t getting out of here alive] Okay, Kai, we’re clear. Get us the hell out of here. [I called out to her as me and the other guys pushed the boat away from the dock to give it an oomph and then once the boat was cleared from the sides, I returned to Sarah] How bad is it? [I asked as I grabbed the first aid kit stowed under the one seat. Not that I could do much with my incredibly limited experience and knowledge, but I felt helpless by not doing what I could for her now. Besides, if I could at least slow the bleeding, that would give her the best fighting chance to stay alive until we were able to get her medical attention]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt like she had lost everything. She used to be the girl who would always go to the beck and call of her dad; he used to be the incredible man she grew up with. He used to be the man who read bedtime stories to her. He used to give her a glass of milk each time. She had so many fond memories of him. But now; it felt like those memories were tainted. Sarah had always believed in him, she fought the urges to go against him. Seeing his boat explode it destroyed her; she broke up with John B the man she loved for him, because he was glad the man who took his father away got justice. Was dead. And suddenly it felt like our love wasn’t meant to be. 

And now Sarah was bleeding out because of the man who was supposed to protect her. He shot fire at her; at her friends not caring of the consequences. That was the sadness of the reality. That I was alone. I couldn’t turn to my sister, I couldn’t protect. I had to put myself first, and that was the pogues my made family. We lift each other up, we go to bat for each other. And I knew the high stakes. I knew what my father was capable of. I had to wonder how I had any ounce of love for him after what he’s done. Lying to protect Rafe, letting my brother get away with attempting to drown me, he let me get drugged. He’d rather put harm to me than take accountability. And I had to swallow that truth. With a heavy head I felt like my vision was becoming blur as I spurred the last task at hand. Hands loosen on the grip against John B’s shirt, as my eyes drifted shut. How long had we walked? Before I heard the rustling of feet hitting the docks. And I felt my body being dropped gently into the boat, back pressed against a hard backing on the edge. Slowly eyes lifted seeing blurs. 

Figures moving left and right; the “ Ropes done.” I heard from JJ as both boys plopped themselves down on the boat. Pope was at the wheel with Kie, I heard the soft whispers of nothingness. And I heard his voice, the one that always dragged me home. And I wanted to be honest, as my hand slowly nimbly moved against the dam fabric of my sweater as I lifted it up. And I saw it the blood, it was dark, and it explained why I felt faint. Turning my eyes to the man I loved; John B was preparing to bandage up the wound for a short time. “ It doesn’t look pretty, I’ll have a nasty scar if anything.” I aired out attempting to lighten the mood as I felt the boat move as if it was full of lighten. 

This remembered me of when I saved his ass, when we first started out; on our little adventure. A shy grin turned against my lips as I spoke. “ Last time one of us had to bandage the other up, I was sneaking you into the house, I saved your ass, are we finally repaying the favor?” I asked with a sense of teasing in my voice. Definitely not the time, but I needed a laugh a small brief moment for just us.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Although I knew now wasn’t the time for jokes and quips, I still appreciated the fact that Sarah was trying to keep the mood light between us. Maybe if the circumstances had been reversed, I would have been all for cracking jokes… Hell, I would more than likely be cracking them too. Given that Sarah had been shot and was rapidly losing blood though, I definitely wasn’t in a fun and games kind of mindset. For her sake though, I did flash her a grin as I leaned down to press a tender kiss to her forehead] Well, I figured I owed you so it was high time I stepped up and returned the favor. Maybe next time you want me to save you though, let’s go with something that involves less blood shed and need for panic… Deal? [Giving it my best effort to joke in return. In the meantime I grabbed the first aid kit. My hand shaking slightly as I quickly fished around for some bandaging and things I thought I could use to stop the bleeding] Either way, I’m putting you in charge of keeping an eye on me to make sure I’m doing this right. I mean, doctor stuff is new territory for me so I’ll need the supervision. All that to say, eyes open at all times, okay? [My casual way of requesting to Sarah that I wanted her to keep her eyes open. Afraid that if she closed them and fell asleep, I might lose her. A thought that I couldn’t bear to consider as I started to do what I could to apply pressure to her wound and then applied some gauze and then bandaging too, all in an effort to stop the significant bleeding she was currently experiencing]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was well aware of the bleeding that now wasn’t the time for her humor, for her need to crack a joke open. But Sarah could see how scared he was; it was in his eyes. She was scared herself that she was about to take her last breath, by the hands of her own father. Ward had no idea she was assuming that he had aimed for her; she had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. Her own father pulled the trigger; he was aiming a weapon at her friends, at the man she loved. And now she was facing deaths door; she remembered the last time. 

John B was the one aching in pain as she ran her fingers with a cold rag over his blooded wound; which is why the dirty blonde showed amusement. Or she was going nuts with the lack of blood in her system. Eyes had slowed movement as he spoke; and she knew this was his way of saying “ Stop Sarah.” As if she planned on taking a bullet tonight. But her smile soften knowing feeling the panic under his tone, and her slimmed hand; her hand reached to touch his arm as a soothing of reassurance that she was okay. “ I promise next time, I’ll tell my dad not to shoot.” She echoed with that sarcastic retort of hers. But Sarah was done with the jokes. Not that she had the energy. She felt like her body was giving out; she felt the color had now drained from her face in the dark. She barely felt the boat moving against the water; the ocean seas; the seas that used to bring soothing. That used to make her feel safe; and now she was trembling, she felt his hand on her wound; and she had glanced down the blood was soaking her skin, right through his hand. “ Use the guse to wipe around the wound, and then bandage it gently at least until we arrive.” To a doctor; assuming we had the money to get me treated; or this was the end. Her eyes landed back on his features, and she uttered an “ I love you.” As if it was the last words she’d say. 

Eyes kept fluttering open and shut in a daze, despite the promise to stay with him, to guide him through the process; she hardly felt her hand move down to her side; as if her limbs were jelly now. If only this boat would move any faster..

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I appreciated Sarah’s attempt to crack jokes now. That was kinda our thing, you could say, but at the moment, I felt far from laughing. I was worried and growing even more so with every passing second. Sarah was shot. She was bleeding out currently, and I had no way of knowing if we’d get her medical attention in time to save her] Speed up the boat! Let’s go! [I yelled out to Pope and Kie as I saw Sarah’s eyes close. Judging by the worried look on JJ’s face, I knew he was thinking the same thing I was] Hurry the hell up, JJ, and help me pack her wound. Quick, get those gauze pads from the bag! [My voice shaking in building worry as JJ did as I ordered; grabbing me what I needed as I tossed the now soiled and blood soaked gauze pads to the side as I took the clean ones from JJ’s grasp. My hand shaking as I pressed it against Sarah’s gunshot wound. After what felt like a damn eternity, the boat pulled to a stop. I didn’t exactly know where we were at the moment, but at this point Pope and Kie were tying off the boat to the pier, so it wouldn’t go anywhere, and then they rushed toward us] “Come on. I got word that there’s a surgeon in town who handles cases like this for the right price.” [Pope explained which prompted my brows to furrow in confusion] “Get Sarah, let’s go.” [Kie instructed, which prompted me to tape off the currently gauzed padding I had in place, then JJ helped me to lift Sarah carefully out of the boat and onto the pier. Once JJ and I were on the pier, I cradled Sarah securely in my arms] “Here, take this bag. It should be enough to get her treated. Pope and I will stay with the boat.” [Kie said as JJ grabbed the bag and the address of the warehouse doctor, and then we rushed through the dark night air toward the provided address. A less than ideal situation from all angles given Sarah’s condition and the fact that we were in an unfamiliar place looking for the location of a doctor that we knew nothing about. Talk about a wild card move, at its best] Stay with me, Sarah. We’re going to get you help. Keep fighting. [I called out to her as JJ barked out instructions and I merely kept up with his pace as I carried Sarah in my arms toward our destination]

[ofnotakook]

A scar that might kill me. 

It was a thought for Sarah; she felt like she’d been through the ringer. Her own family was willing to sacrifice her for their own benefits. Sarah once thought the world of her father; of the family. But now she knew the truth they only craved the wealth they’d stomp on anyone who dared to stand in their way. Sarah’s own brother tried to drown her, and now her father was the one who pulled the trigger. Obviously he was aiming for John B, but Sarah knew she’d always end up in the cross fire. 

Not that she cared, she’d rather die than live without him. The words she said that night; on the smaller boat, as John B fought for his life, to escape the death sentence. And I meant it; I loved John B and yeah we fought; we ended up screaming at each other. But i’d do anything to be with him, and now as I was fighting for my own life; I only hoped the pogues survived. Sarah was falling unconscious, she had felt her body shutting off. The last words she spoke were of love, an undenying world of love for him. But she felt the blood lost. She felt her wounds becoming fetel. And she heard the urgent, the eagerness in her man’s voice as she felt the vague packing of her wound. How long had it been? 

She had no idea, because she felt darkness overcome her. She felt like she was falling into limo. She barely felt John B and JJ as they wrapped her sim arms around their shoulders and held her up. Enough to look like Sarah was walking, but she was dragged towards the clinic, and she barely heard the exchange when the surgeon called the three up. And with each step, she felt a slight ache in her body. An ache she wanted to subside. But Sarach knew she had to fight; to live, to open her eyes again. She felt her frame fall to a bedding; as her head hung down as the surgeon whispered. “ It’ll be okay, fight.” And She fel the breathing tube come to her nose, she felt the bleeding that was exposed. The doctor mumbled a few words to her friends. “ Do you have the money? She may not live.” He uttered and I felt my body weak. My own shadow breathing as my eyes slowly woke, for a second to see the unfamiliar surroundings, the walls brown. The tubes connected to me, I was scared. But I couldn’t move before my eyes went shut all over again. 

The doctor took the money and he soon took a tool; to save me, if it did any good, because right now I felt like I was on the brink of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

“Yeah, man. Here.” [JJ aired out in response to the shifty doctor’s request for money, before handing him a bag with money in it. My eyes shifted into a roll watching the doctor count it. So much for a moral code to save a life. Apparently all this asshole cared about what money] Just save her. Please. [I aired out pleadingly as I held Sarah’s hand with my one hand; all the while gently stroking back the hair from her face with my free hand. After a moment or so the doctor seemed satisfied with the amount of money JJ gave him inside that bag, and then he began. Watching as he first put Sarah under with what I assumed to be some kind of anesthesia before he grabbed a questionable looking scalpel so he could begin making the first cut. I knew in my gut that trusting this doctor might be the worst idea we’ve ever had, but at the same point, our hands were tied. It was either this option or we’d lose Sarah. Sure, his “she may not live” statement didn’t leave me with much confidence in his skills, but I had to believe in Sarah now. Sarah was strong. She was brave. If anyone could fight this, it was her] Come on, baby. Fight this. Don’t you dare leave me. Fight, baby. Fight. [I gently pleaded in her ear before pressing a tender kiss to her forehead] “Keep watch.” [I heard the doctor instruct of JJ before giving me a knowing sort of look and then a nod] “Here we go.” [The doctor said in less than a confident tone as he made the first cut; taking the scalpel across Sarah’s skin in order to remove the bullet from her body. It was excruciating to watch, but I promised myself that no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her side] “Grab those gauze pads and some gloves. Pour some of that vial with sanitizing solution directly over the incision spot and then place the gauze pads firmly across the area to slow her bleeding. We don’t want her losing more blood than she already has.” [The doctor instructed; forcing me to release Sarah’s hand, so I could assist in the surgery. After what felt like an eternity, he finished; managing to remove the bullet and then to seemingly successfully repair damage to her wounded organ internally. Once he finished, he stitched her up then covered the wound with a significant amount of gauze pads and medical tape] “It’s a wait and see, at this point, so let’s hope she’s a fighter.” [The doctor said while washing his hands in the sink in the corner of the room] She is. [I flatly said in response before removing my gloves and washing my own hands once the doctor had finished. After ensuring my hands were clean, I returned to the table where Sarah rested and I took her hand in my own] You’re a fighter, Sarah. The strongest person I know, so fight this. I’m not going anywhere. [I had no way of knowing if she could hear me, but I didn’t care. On the off chance that she could, I was going to remind her of her strength and ability to fight this now]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt the screams into darkness. She felt like she was on a cloud in limo. She had no control of her body; she felt like she was paralyzed. She didn’t have the power to move, she barely felt her body being held up. She didn’t want to die, she didn’t want to be traped in her own bedroom. She never asked her own father to shoot bullets at her and her friends. Sarah suddenly felt like her once simply life was a cycle of nightmares. Death on our door steps, the rush of running; being on the med. Sarah knew her getting shot was her fault. If she had just listened to John B weeks ago; that Ward didn’t have my best interest at heart. 

If I had stayed with Pogues instead of trusting my now psychic family. One trying to kill me left and right. Sarah had learned her lesson, the only people she could count on was herself, the pogues, even her sister she just hoped her sister was okay. She knew she was stipid to be thinking about anyone but herself now. But she held sympathy for others. The aching in her body was enough to force her to scream in pain if she wasn’t knocked out. She vaguely heard the way her body gently was placed down on a mental table.  I vaguely felt John B his breath in my ear as he tried to reassure me I was okay, I was a fighter. I was in my own little bubble. The darkness in my lids, the way my body was lifeless, especially as the doctor did insert his tool into my body, if I was awake I’d be screaming. I barely felt it; probably from the anesthesia. I couldn’t move, I had no idea how long I was out. I could vaguely hear the voices as the doctor echoed out it would be touch and go. Would I be surviving? Was I still bleeding out? Sarah felt the stirs in her mind as she laid still. Baby, fight.. Words echoed in my ears. 

John B, he needed me, he needed me to be strong, to fight through the blood lost. I couldn’t let him down. I was groggy when I suddenly felt the strength to open my eyes. The small light above me it flashed my eyes forcing me to squit, and I felt John B’s head on my stomach, not on the wounded skin, but right under. I was aching as I let out a soft wine. My hand pale as I lowered my hand onto his dirty brown locks, fingers slowly combed through his hair. “ John B.” I echoed in a whisper; I couldn’t speak and I noticed JJ was sitting in the chair, eyes closed, even JJ stayed. A made family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Hours passed by and there was no change. Sarah was so still and I had no way of knowing if she’d ever wake up. The doctor didn’t sound hopeful. Made a snide remark about her chances of pulled through as he greedily took our money and then ran like hell like some kind of coward. Clearly it was all about money for him. As more time passed, I found my head resting against Sarah’s side. Near her incision but not close enough to cause any further damage. I just wanted and needed to be close to her now. JJ wasn’t far away. He took a look out to make sure Ward nor any of his men were nearby before he’d return to the private room here and take a seat in the chair adjacent from where Sarah and I rested now. I didn’t know how much more time had passed… Felt like an eternity even though I knew it was probably just a few more hours, but eventually I heard the faint sound of her voice, as well as felt her fingers rustle gingerly through my hair. At that my head immediately shot up and I looked at her. Relief flooding my face and expression currently] You’re awake! Thank God! [I uttered out in evident relief as I pressed a gentle kiss to the back of her hand] How are you feeling? The black market doctor left a few things for pain if you need it. [The guy wasn’t exactly reliable but he did seem to save Sarah’s life, so at the moment, I was thinking a bit more favorably of him. Maybe he wasn’t a total money-hungry quack after all. Jury was still out on that one though] Do you want some water? [I asked as I had already picked up a fresh bottle of water; prepared to give her some if she was thirsty]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt weak, she ha no idea as to how long she’d been laying her. The memory of her father; of how easily he had aimed a gun at her, at her friends because of what? Jealousy? Because he wanted to hold this wild control over her? Sarah had once desired to please her family. She had once idolize her father the memory of us at the docks when I was only a little girl it clouded who I knew he was. 

But a few hours before he was so willing to throw me under the bus. He was so willing to let me bleed out on our yard. Because of his hate for the Pogues. I was hurt, I was feeling betrayed but at the same time, relieved as I felt my body come to life. I felt my eyes lift open as I adjusted to the dim light. I saw JJ in the corner as my eyes peeled over to John B who had his head rested against my palm. And I knew I was lucky, he was here. He loved me, and I had to let my fingers run soothingly through his dirty blonde locks. A small smile peeled at my lips. And I knew I couldn’t move. I felt numb to my core as my body was now healing from the blood lost, Sarah wasn’t going to jump up, the fear of Ward on our tail was aching against my own skin. The blonde had peered up at him; the man she loved so much. 

“ I’m okay.” As okay as I was going to be. The wound had been deep, the stitched up wound was felt as my eyes slowly moved to the man I loved. My hand moved to reach for John B. And I felt a sigh of relief escape my own lips. And I felt my gaze linger on him. “ I’m sorry, I’m sorry my dad is a crazy,” My words could never compare to the pain my family has caused him, the pogues and I wanted to do my part to mend those fences. “ Yes.” I echoed to the option of water my throat felt dry but I wasn’t going to jump forward, I slowly lifted my head up to get to a sitting position. My free hand had moved to my side, knowing the pain; the wound my own family caused.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I felt mounds of relief when I heard Sarah’s voice. She was alive. She was awake, and she was speaking. Lifting her hand to my lips as I pressed a couple of kisses to the back of her hand, then gently lowered her hand back down onto the metal table she was lying on] Hey, don’t apologize. It’s not your fault. All that matters is keeping you safe and away from your deranged family. [No matter what, I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t let Ward harm Sarah again. I thought to myself as I brought a fresh bottle of water to Sarah’s lips, so she could drink as much as she wanted and needed. I knew she needed time to rest and heal, but the sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better I could guarantee her safety from her family. One could hope, at least. I mean the way Ward operated, and the fact that he knew people all over the world, I wasn’t sure exactly how far remote we would need to go, and for how long either for that matter, in order to keep Sarah safe, but no matter what, I’d do what it takes. I came close to losing Sarah this time… Too close for comfort, so I wasn’t willing to take any chances with her safety again. At least not until Ward was no longer a threat to her] Once you’re well enough, we’re going to get you out of here. Pope and Kie are keeping an eye on the boat, and when you’re strong enough, we’re all getting on that boat, and getting as far away as possible. We figure with some distance and preferably some place off the grid, eventually your father will stop looking for you. [Maybe wishful thinking since Ward wasn’t one who took well to losing, but one could hope he’d eventually give up and accept that Sarah was gone]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah kept asking herself the obvious how she’d been blind. How she was capable of still holding a torch of love for her family. With all the crimes all the ways her own brother tried to murder her; sending drug mules her way, being the one that nearly drowned her to death. And now her own father; was so mad at the Pogues so terrified of losing his daughter to the pogues; not wanting to lose the fight that he aimed and shot me. The blood that once covered her fingertips, the blood the redness that ran over her sweater, it was an image Sarah couldn’t erase.  

Her friends, her boyfriend? Cut into the crossfires because of her fucked up  family. And even now as she opened her eyes; said a few words, she felt the aching on her wound, damn that stitch is gonna hurt like hell. But it was comforting to feel his touch, to witness his lips touching her knuckles once again. John B, he was her anchor that kept her whole. A soften expression; a smile curled at the corners of her lips as she saviored his touch; his lips against her skin. “  They drugged me, they forced me here. I feel trapped like no one is safe in that house, but my sister..”  A fear for the little Cameron it rocked me whole now, as I felt the lump forming in my throat. Wheezie she was innocent had no idea who’s roof she was living under. Like myself; I’d been blinded from the truth. But now my father was deranged; he passed off onto Rafe; and Rose was clueless as ever a pond in the game; until she crossed Ward. 

A slight cough was heard; as the blonde felt the wetness hit her tongue, one sip of water turned into half the bottle until she released the top from her lips and she slowly sat herself up, her palms hitting the metal of the table to hold herself up. Nuts insane considering her own wounds she wore. But her eyes ran along John B’s features with ease. “ You know he won’t let that happen. He blames you the pogues for his princess no longer being in his care. I’m a game for him to win..” A sad truth, an ached formed in her chest now.  “ I wouldn’t blame you if you allowed the pogues to leave me here for  dust to get away. I don’t want to bring you down, or put you and pogues in danger..” Not again the words hid  at the tips of her tongue. 

Danger; our names, but Ward he’d kill to end the war..I was terrified the lengths he’d go no matter how safe I felt with John B; he’d get hurt because of me. A pill I needed to swallow now.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, that would never happen. [I flatly replied with a matter of fact sort of shrug. Sure, I knew if this was just about Sarah, maybe JJ and the others would have high-tailed it out of here. Not necessarily Pope since he had a heart to do the right thing, but Kie was what you could say, hot and cold toward Sarah, so it wouldn’t take much for her to bail on Sarah. And well, JJ hated Kooks in general, so he had no loyalties to Sarah either. Thing was though, they all knew I’d literally die to protect Sarah, and the Pogues would always put their lives on the line to protect each other. All that to say, as long as I was staying put at Sarah’s side, the Pogues wouldn’t be going anywhere either because they’d always have my back, just like I’d always have theirs too. We fought fiercely for each other] Even if the others decided to high-tail it out of here, I’d never leave your side. Unless you tell me to go, I’m not going anywhere… [I started to say before an amused smirk followed] And even then, I can’t promise I’d actually leave. You know I’m stubborn when people try to tell me what to do. [I teased even though that was the truth] Either way, once you’re well enough, we’re all getting the hell out of here, and getting to safety together. Until then, just rest and heal. [I said as I gave her hand another gentle squeeze. My way of reassuring her that we were all in this together; no matter what the outcome]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah knew her choices  as of late not only disappointed herself but those around her. Sarah never wanted the wealth, she never wanted to be accepted as the princess Kook. That title had been given to her. People made assumptions about her; her personality; how she followed the kook business, and yes once upon a time she was a kook. Bu from that one day running around with John B at chapel Hill, helping him seek answers to a quest she had no idea how over our heads we were. We were just kids running around aimlessly. But I saw that treasure hunting look in his eyes; the way his eyes lit up at a map, and I mused, I admired who John B. And he made me want more for myself. 

One day; one rain kiss on the docks was all it took for the dirty blonde to feel hooked. He’s who she loved, and even with death upon us; my dad probably having a search squad on our heads. I had let the pogues down; when I had let John B go, I was angry, I was sad when I thought my dad died, and john B was just so glad to see him fall through the cracks. My dad was money hungry, he was awful he killed, he allowed Rafe to get away with Murder, but he was my dad; but now as I groggily came out of my unconscious state; I remembered the cage I felt locked in. I recalled his aim, the gun shot wound that should’ve killed me. My own father aimed the trigger, and right now Sarah knew in her gut she was a pogue, and she appreciated the friendships she made. Eyes glanced over for comfort to the boy that made her heart race. And her pinky found his; a trace of her finger against his own. 

“ I made that mistake once, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for letting you go John B, I was..” Pausing briefly before a sigh could be heard escaping her lips. “ I was hurting, I didn’t want to believe my dad was this monster. I know you said you’ve always got me, but I wouldn’t blame you if you decided no one chances.” Chances to love me, to be together after this horror war my dad had, all the times guns aimed at us because of him, a war he wanted to win on behalf of me. One he already lost. 

Because my heart; who I was, it was a pogue; my known family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I get it, Sarah. Before I came into your life and opened your eyes to who your dad and brother really are, you had a really tight bond with your dad. Naturally you’d want to fight to protect his reputation. It only makes sense that you wouldn’t want to believe your dad was capable of something like that. If the situation was reversed, and it was me in your shoes, I probably would have done the same thing as you. [I admitted honestly. It was the truth. If this was my dad, I would have fought to protect his reputation too. It’s what you do for the people you love. I’d do it for Sarah and the pogues too because I consider them my family. No matter what, I’d always have their backs, just like I know the pogues would have mine] You’ll never run out of chances with me, Sarah. I hate to break it to you, but I love you, so until you say otherwise, you’re stuck with me. [As much truth as there was in my words, I aired out that honesty with a joking tone] Anyway, for now, we just need to get your strong enough that we can move somewhere safer for the duration of your recovery. [I knew where we were would suffice for now, but it would only be a matter of time before Sarah’s dad figures out we’re hiding out here currently. We’d cross that bridge if and when the time comes. For now I wanted Sarah to get a little stronger and heal up a bit before we decide to move her]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah had always been privileged growing up. She knew of the different layers of the island. She never wanted to believe in herself to judge others; the living, how some had to work harder than others. But Sarah was guilty to pulling away when it felt messy and difficult. When someone got too close to her; she was the one guilty of running. The fear of being seen truly. It’s what happened with her friendship with Kie, and it was easy to blame the split on how John B reacted to her father’s then death. But the truth was Sarah was scared. 

Scared of letting go of the shielded life she lived, the ground beneath her gone. Her family shattered into pieces. Her dad wasn’t the man she once admired. He was a monster; he felt threatened he knew I wasn’t under the spell, and he tried to hurt me. My own brother tried to kill me, did I feel safe with my family? No I was shot because of my dad, and now I felt the numbness against my skin. The numbness that tingled the layer of my stomach; where the scars stood. I wouldn’t blame John B if he wanted to cut loses here, and leave me stranded. But I knew him his heart; the good boy inside of him; the boy I loved with every fiber inside of me. “ It’s not about him anymore. I knew who he was; he wasn’t the dad I once laughed with on the beach when I was a little girl, he knew he lied, he knew what he did, and my brother is protecting him. I’m sorry for the pain my family caused you.” The pogues hanging onto my lips. 

Hearing the words; unlimited chances hung in the air. I love you; and I loved him, I wouldn’t let the male get away from me again. Sarah tried her best to master the pain, the smile heated against brims as her hand grasped hold of his fingers. “ I love you.” words spoken as the blonde attempted to sit up using the strength of her elbows to hold her upper frame upright. But she knew staying put wasn’t an option; Ward had his minions surroundings areas; I would gasp through the pain than get caught. An intense stare hinted into my features as I spoke. “ John B.. we have to move. I can handle the pain. This island isn’t safe not with my dad, he has people..” And I knew Ward; he wanted power; to hold an angle, and us staying still didn’t feel safe; for me or the pogues.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I knew Sara was right… We had to move sooner rather than later. We were basically sitting ducks here. Ward had this whole island in his pocket, so it would only be a matter of time before he got wind of the fact that we were here. I’ll be damned if I did all this work to break Sara out of there… And then to get her the help she needed after she got shot, just for that deranged idiot to take her back to the prison he had her encamped in] Okay, if you’re sure you can handle it, we’ll move. [Worried if she busts a stitch she may bleed out though] We need to take it slow though. Be smart about this. We can’t afford you busting any stitches. If you bleed out… [I trailed off. Not even able to finish off the thought of that possibility] Let me tell JJ we’re going to move. [I said as I pressed a kiss to Sara’s forehead; letting my lips linger there for a second or two before I broke away. It was almost like I didn’t want to let her out of my sight; fearful I’d lose her] Be right back. [I promised as I briefly and reluctantly left the table she was resting on in order to find JJ, who was keeping watch just outside] We’re moving. We need to get off of this island. Alert the others. [JJ agreed; immediately pulling out his phone to message the others to get the boat ready for our momentary departure. In seeing JJ got the ball rolling on that, I returned to Sara. Preparing to move her once she gave me the okay. I still felt unsettled about us leaving, but at least night had set in, so that would give us the advantage as we used the darkness, shadows, and any alleyways we could find to our advantage] Just tell me when, and I’ll help you off the table.

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was embarrassed of who her family was now. It used to be a loving home, used to be a place of safety. The countless family dinners outside on the docks by the grills. The countless boat rides we had. The loving embraces from her dad; he used to be a home for her. And now when she thought about Ward all she felt was anger, betrayal. Someone who only cared about greed, he went out of his way to coverup a death, to frame John B, and now he even if it was an accident he shot me. I was stitched up because of him. All that to say; I didn’t want to be stuck on this island for one more minute. I was on edge, my hand touching the bandaged wound, as I felt the pain. We’re sitting ducks; Ward had his minions all over the island; it was possible he’d be hunting me down. This was a lowkey office; and I doubted this bystander of a doctor was on the payroll. 

I was aching, I didn’t want the drugs, but I also had to put the pogues first; John B first. They came to Nassau for her, Sarah didn’t care if she was limbing in pain whimpering as she sped up to walk as long as we ended up on that boat and made our way back to OBX a home, a new safety. We’d find a way to the gold; our rightful place of earnings. Sarah could see the concern written on John B’s face now, but she was okay. A smile of reassurance coming from her now. She laid kept on the metal table now, as she nodded, biting down on her lower lip to hold out on any pain. “ I promise, slow and steady wins the race.” I added with a joke, Sarah found her more humours side with him. The touch of his lips on her forehead, it made her insides turn, the butterflies now. Sarah had waited until John B had stepped outside to inform JJ before she was able to slowly sit back up. Damn the shooting pain that ran up her side. Deep breaths, Sarah was about to move to step down from the table when she heard her boyfriend, A soft brave smile came to her lips. Reaching out her hand to grasp hold of his arm for support. “ We need to move. I’m ready.” Her stitching may not be; but I could rest once we got safety; but until the docks came into view the dirty blonde wouldn’t feel at ease. 

An unsettling feeling at the pit of her stomach.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised the second I offered my help to Sarah once she was ready, she didn’t hesitate to take my hand. Anybody else would be feeling sorry for themselves and their situation, but not Sarah. She was a total bad ass. By far, the bravest person I knew. Thing was though, I hated moving her. She nearly bled out and died after being shot. Her stitches were the only thing keeping her from doing so now, so what she needed more than anything was to rest and heal. Problem was, her deranged father and his entourage of employees that would be on the look out for us. I didn’t like having to move her from here, but it was either this, or get caught by her father’s people. Neither outcome was ideal, which was why I left the final choice up to Sarah. Her answer clear as day when she held out her hand and took a hold of my arm for support] I can carry you. I’ll do the whole slow and steady thing… Taking your word on the winning the race part you joked about. [Flashing her an amused grin. Knowing now wasn’t the time for fun and jokes, but maybe we both needed a little light humor given the shitty circumstances we were facing. I silently told myself as I helped her off the metal table she was lying across and then kept a secure hold on her until she was steady on her feet] You good? [Needing to know she was okay before I made any further movements or plans]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah should’ve been more hesitant to move. Given the amount of stitches her body had to have, the amount of blood she had lost from that gunshot. The one that came from her father. Sarah if she had too much time to dwell on it would start feeling useless a burden to her own family. Because one her dad was willing to lie for Rafe, yet the innocent child like myself was left to scrape by. Pick a side, and my heart was with the pogues, with John B. And my brother was a bit deranged now, but I suppose father like son, Rafe had to get that attitude from somewhere didn’t he? 

I fought the urge to roll my eyes now. As I found that strength to lift my body up to sit and reach my feet the white tennis shoes to the ground. And I did and felt that aching pain on my lower abdomen. Where the stitches were, and as John B came to view I wore a gentle smile as I reached to brace myself for the pain as I put the weight on my feet. Fingers wrapping around his forearm you felt his muscles now as I found my courage to fully stand. “ I don’t want to make it harder for you to run, I’ll try to keep up.” A promise to my heart, but if John B and the others got hung up because of me I’d never forgive myself. The pogues were in a tough spot because of me. And I hated it, I’d rather bleed out on that table than for them to get caught. All that to say, my hand slid into his bigger palm with a squeeze. “ I’m ready, let’s meet the others.” Conviction in my tone as with an easy step started towards the exit doors; to leave, before my dad found us, before we felt in hot waters.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, I don't want to run the risk of you popping one of your stitches and bleeding out, so we'll take it slow and steady. Hell, if we have to crawl there to keep your safe, then so be it. [Mind you I didn't expect either of us to crawl, obviously, but I was just trying to prove a point now. No matter what risk came to me, Sarah's safety and well-being would always be my top focus. I silently thought to myself as I gave her hand a gentle squeeze] I'm good carrying you if that will be easier and less painful than you having to walk. [Fortunately the pier wasn't far from here, but the problem was, we couldn't exactly walk right down main street to get there since Sarah's father, no doubt, had people out there looking for us. Nah, we needed to take the most discreet way possible in order to keep ourselves from getting noticed before we reach the boat that would hopefully get us the hell out of there] JJ's right outside waiting for us... He's already figured out a plan with the best route we should take to get to the pier where the boat's waiting for us. [I explained as I securely and protectively held her close to me as she got on her feet; giving her a nod in reply as she gave the "okay" that she was ready] Walking or do you want me to carry you? [Knowing Sarah had an independent side to her so I figured I'd leave the decision up to her]

[ofnotakook]

I can always trust in you

@apogueforlife 

I can always trust in you 

Trust; it had to be earned. Love; it had to be developed. For Sarah she always had her guard up. Each time she’d get close to letting someone in the other shoe would drop, she’d freeze up, and run in the other direction. With each boyfriend she ever had she had the urge to run. To distant herself when she felt like she was trapped. When she felt the pressure to feel more than what she did. Topper he liked the idea of her. He loved the idea of being with her; but he wasn’t in love with her. 

There’s only one boy Sarah loved; and that was John B. It happened unexpectedly. It happened on a day she never saw coming. That day stayed with her. The day we went to chapel hill; the day we had fun dressing each other up. The day we pretended to be our alter egos; Val and Vlad. It was nice to be herself. I didn’t feel the pressure to be perfect. I didn’t feel like my family was watching me, I was myself. I felt safe, I felt like John B saw me despite all the flaws I had. He loved me for me, and I loved him. It was a roller coaster of a relationship if you asked me. We had gone from barely knowing each other; to falling completely utterly in love. I gave up my kook card for him. I knew the obsluces we’d be facing now, the pogue’s vs the kook. But nothing made me question my loyalty to him. To the Pogues. It got messy with my dad; him being the reason Big John was gone. The reason why the gold was taken. The reason I was on the run with John B. The gold felt so close yet so far. We managed to clear John B’s name but that’s because Ward decided in his best interest to fake his own death and act like the hero. The guy that claimed to have been a killer in order to protect his own son. Rafe just the thought of being near him made me sick to my stomach. For a second I was upset, I felt like my whole body ached when I witnessed the boat blow up. When I witnessed my father shatter beyond the sea. And that’s when I saw the truth; what led to us being torn apart; what led to John B and I no longer being together. He had been happy to ward dead; and I couldn’t exactly find the words to blame him. He took everything from him. But at the end of the day; he was my dad. I was hurting and I remembered that look all too well; the look of proudnessI felt like I was seeing another person. I was grieving the dad I once looked up to, to the dad that I was once his princess. I needed John B to hold me, to make me feel like it was always going to be okay. But it suddenly felt like us it wasn’t meant to be.. 

Walking away for yourself; was all you could do. It was hard to be near him; to be pulled back into the adventure; to the cross. But for Pope I’d be there; awkwardness assured. Sarah didn’t know if she should make eye contact with him; or just stay silent. Silence seemed better; until that night; we had a plan to get the cross from Rafe; the big truck was parked outside my house. JJ and Pope were hidden behind the bushes. I was determined to walk inside; to get the key to unlock the truck; how we’d get the heavy cross out was a big ass story of it’s own. But I had made two steps to the gates, one glance backwards; I saw him John B was about to get up; and for a second I found myself hopeful; maybe this was the moment of the unknown. What comes next? Dark hues met for a second and I swore the air was taken out of my lungs; but he didn’t budge, didn’t move. Giving me the indication we had nothing left to say. That was the last memory I had of him; of us staring at each other. 

Head leaned against the gated up windows of my room at the barbados house, The house I was locked into. The boat felt like a nightmare; I was drugged by my own family. Rose had put a drug in my tea. Rafe and had helped her execute the plan; to force me here against my will. I remembered telling Ward when he claimed John B only cared about the treasure about the gold that I was just stuck in the cross hair that he was wrong. That John b would find him and come for him once I went missing. How wrong had I been? I wanted to blink back the tears that dared to fall. I was a pogue at heart; I chose it for John B because I loved him, despite our differences he’d always have a permanent place in my heart. It had been weeks since we left on the boat, I had tried to zone out the conversations of my parents; I had pretended to be sleeping at times, but here once I had been pulled into my room I never left. I guess Ward was afraid I’d run, or threaten to tell the cops his own daughter was kidnapped against her will. Give or take. Sarah swallowed the lump in her throat; it had gotten dark. She smelt the tray of food that her sister left her outside the door. Her bed was an inch away; The light pink covers still in place, it had been a day or two since we arrived, and I had slept in my bed because that meant i was okay, that meant that I was adjusting to being here; in this house. When all I wanted was to break free. At the window, on the seat where my back was pressed against the wall. Head tilted towards the window, I could see the water; any boats that passed by. I was alone; and all I could hope was that the Pogue’s were okay that perhaps my dad was right they managed to get the cross and that’s all that mattered for Pope. Eyes moved to the stars; for a moment it was nice to believe we were looking at the same stars; as if John B was on his way; assuming my dad was lying. For now all I could do was hold hope; I’d find a way out; it was a done deal. 

Tomorrow; I’d work out a plan. The Pogues would have me, if I found him. We’d always have each other. A wistful thought as a hint of a smile tainted onto my lips.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Love. Definitely not something I ever believe really existed. I always saw it more as, in life, people come and go. The ones who matter will stick with you, through thick and thin. For me, that was the Pogues: JJ, Kie, and Pope. I don’t remember a time in my life when those three weren’t part of it, and something tells me, I’ll never shake them either. Not that I’d want to, cause they’re everything to me. Then Sarah Cameron busted into my life unexpectedly… One of those surprising moments where I got myself in a sticky situation, and Sarah Cameron, of all people, was the one who bailed me out of it. Even more surprising though was how I felt when I was with her. It was the first time in my life when I found myself wanting to be with a girl exclusively. In time she even made me rethink my original theory about love. Then, well, I guess you could say life happened, and we broke up. Sure, I knew I played a part in our break up. When her father died, I should have been more supportive of the toll that loss would take on Sarah. Yeah, the guy was bad news… A lying crook, which Sarah obviously knew too, but he was still her father. Given the bad blood I had with Ward, and also the fact that he murdered my father, could you really blame me for being relieved that the guy was finally gone? Right or wrong, it’s how I felt. This leading to the end of Sarah’s and my relationship. Still, in my heart I knew this wasn’t the end for us. A love like ours always finds a way back to one another. Naïve or not, I refused to see it any other way…

Then weeks passed and I was starting to wonder if it really had been the end for us. Mind you, I still wasn’t giving up, but instead of dwelling on what may or may not happen between me and Sarah, instead the Pogues and I focused on getting the cross back for Pope. It actually became a, “Kill two birds with one stone” type of adventure for us though, since word got to me that Sarah had been abducted by her family. Them ultimately boarding a ship with Sarah and the cross, allegedly heading to Barbados; knowing that was exactly where we would be going to. This was it… This was our chance to, not only help Pope get the cross back, but also for me to rescue Sarah too…

Given that us Pogues had made some enemies, and also the fact that we didn’t have so much as a pot to piss in, much less money to travel to Barbados, it took some work, a lot of time, and even more creativity on our parts before we finally reached Barbados. Once we did, I knew we needed to devise a plan to get back both Sarah and the cross. Of course JJ, as usual, came up with one of the worst plans I had ever heard. This saying a lot considering JJ’s had some really shitty plans, over the years. This one pretty much topped the other bad plans he’s had though; prompting all of us to shoot down his plan and come up with another one. Knowing it was either come up with a better plan, or go with JJ’s plan which will likely either get us all killed, or at the very least, we’ll end up locked up in some jail cell. In time we did come up with a new plan. Not a great one, but definitely better than JJ’s plan, so it was something, at least. For our part we decided one step at a time…

We’d wait till night, rescue Sarah first, and then once we had her safely out of that house and away from her deranged family, we’d devise a plan to get the cross back. I mean, it’s not like we could just knock on the front door, and request either. Not without being shot, that is. We couldn’t even break in and steal the cross without getting caught, since it was so damn heavy, it was going to take a hell of a lot of brute strength to carry it, so we’d just deal with that plan later. For now, my focus was on Sarah. Sure, I knew there was a chance I’d be the last person she’d want to see tonight, but given me and the Pogue’s rescuing her, or her remaining a hostage with her own family, I figured I was the lesser of the evils, so to speak. I justified as Kie and Pope remained look outs from the ground; keeping hidden to the garden area where they tried to remain unseen, while JJ and I went to the roof. With JJ’s help, he hoisted me down onto the balcony I had scoped out and learned led to the bedroom they were keeping Sarah locked in. Once I approached the balcony window, I peaked inside discreetly; making sure her family was nowhere in sight before I gave a couple of light taps on the window. My way of alerting Sarah that I was here. Of course the window was pad-locked, which just pissed me off more. How could they do this to Sarah? The Cameron’s definition of family was nothing more than a load of bullshit, if you ask me, because this isn’t how you treat family. I thought in building anger as I used the pin I had with me to trigger the lock. Once I heard it click, my eyes shifted up toward JJ. The thumbs up he gave me in reply assuring me he had cut the security system like he confidently told me he could easily handle. This was JJ, so although I’d trust him with my life, and well, I had a few times, I still held my breath as I slowly and gingerly opened the window; expelling a quiet sigh of relief when an alarm didn’t sound as I opened the window] Val…? [I quietly whispered her code name into the dark bedroom. Hoping it would soften any resentment she might have in seeing me here now] Vlad and the crew are here to spring you from here… [I further whispered into the dark bedroom as I waited for her to come over to the window; knowing we didn’t have long before someone would alert the Cameron’s that the security system had been hacked into, so the sooner we got out of there, the better our chances of getting out of here alive]

[ofnotakook]

The pogue plans never went according to plan. Not that Sarah was going to complain now considering. She was able to escape the bars that locked her into her old bedroom. She was tired of starving herself out of spite. She was tired of laying awake at night in fear that she might be dragged out of bed. She was tired of being forced to live the perfect life. Forced to smile for her parents; the only one in her family she liked was her sister Wheezie, she’s who I wanted to protect. But she had young opinions, didn’t see what our family was capable of. And given how much risk John B went through to find me, I had to go with him. Not that I wanted to stay trapped or that I’d risk his life to save my sister. 

I felt torn with myself now. I escaped; I was on the roof; I had survived the lies, I had survived my own father aiming a gun at me; of course to his unknown knowledge Ward did exceed in his aiming and catching fire on one of us. I doubted his attention was to hurt me. Yet again it felt like a toss up considering, he did try to strangle me to death; and drugged me to get onto that stupid boat. But I knew him to know the problem wasn’t my stubbornness, it was John B and the pogues. He was threatened, and right now the Camerons wasn’t my family; it was the pogues. I had chose them a long time ago weather I wanted to admit it or not. 

Safe; is what I felt; despite the pain that was pooling on my side; the white sweater was making it difficult to hide. But I felt his kiss; the graze of his lips on my head, a tenderness of who we were. A love language for us. Seeing as JJ had followed my lead; and started down the ladder; I had stepped forward turning my back to where my hues fell on the male I loved with all my heart. Despite our differences that did come to light when I uttered the words maybe we weren’t meant to be, to work out. 

A soulfulness in my stare as I uttered my words. “ Promise you’ll come down.” I mouthed the words “ I can’t lose you.” As my palm wasn’t already filled with my own blood. Taking my hand from side, I placed them firmly on the handles of the ladder, with one step and than the next. I caught sight of the droplets of blood hitting the ladder as I climbed down, It wasn’t until I reached the bottom, I felt JJ; place his hand on my hip in order to help me off when he wore this stunned expression. “ Sarah.” He mouthed, I knew he felt it; the blood that now covered his hand; I shook my head. “ Don’t say a word.” I had strength I’d be okay until I couldn’t walk anymore; He was about to say something when I hit him in the chest. 

John B would be in earshot; I couldn’t tell him yet; once we were in the clear I’d tell him, but I didn’t want him to worry about me, not after all the risks he took to save me. Pushing myself to the side, I eyed the small area where our feet hit the grass; Kie and Pope had to make it to the gates; where it led to the waterfront it was our get away. Our only glimmer of hope.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I promise. I’ll be right behind you. [I assured Sarah as I watched JJ go down the ladder first, to ensure it was safe for Sarah to follow. Once JJ gave the “all clear” signal, I gave Sarah and nod to begin descending the ladder] You’ll be okay. JJ will meet you at the bottom, and I won’t be far behind. [I reminded her as she started to descend the ladder. I ducked down lower to the roof as I heard the sound of more gunshots looming in the air. Once Sarah was about halfway down the ladder, I started to position myself onto the ladder; getting a good grip on the sides before I slowly began descending the ladder too. It wasn’t long before I could faintly hear Sarah and JJ safely at the bottom on the ground below the ladder, and I was following them moments later. After I reached the bottom, I noticed the concerned look JJ was giving me, but assuming it had something to do with the fact that we were all still in danger on the Cameron’s grounds, I didn’t question JJ on his strange look. Instead, I snaked my arm gently and protectively around Sarah’s shoulder; gently tugging her closer to me before speaking up in a hushed volume] Okay, we made it this far, which is great, but we’re not out of danger yet. Let’s get to Pope and Kie, and then all of us get the hell out of here. [I suggested before nodding my head toward JJ; gesturing for him to lead the way. The sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better our chances would be of us surviving this]

[ofnotakook]

He’d be right behind me. It was a sense of comfort knowing I wasn’t alone.That I was nearly to safety but the question lingered of how long. Because I felt the bleeding on my hip, I felt the lost of blood that peeled from my skin. Not that Sarah was about to utter a word. If she did their plan of escaping would be jeopardized. And JJ and John B had risked it all for her. Kie and Pope were on the lower ground taking cover on her behalf. Sarah wasn’t selfish; she knew when to take one for the team. Her dad; his shots that were fired. It was venages for her; for the Pogues brainwashing her; but the truth was Sarah saw beneath the scars. She saw the truth. The perfect knit family wasn’t real. She had hoped her father would be okay; that he would let her go. Let the pogues go give John B what was rightfully his. 

But instead he saw me as property. I wasn’t a person to him. I was his daughter yes; but I also was my own mind and heard. All that to say I tried not to shake when I heard the gunshots in the distance. I had my hands holding onto the ladder as JJ slowly helped me down. Blood it was obvious at the edge of the ladder; I easily shook my head to JJ; indicating John B didn’t need to know. I was fine. I Swore I caught an edge of concern against his expression. Did JJ care? I asked myself as feet hit the pavement; the edge of the roof as we lowered ourselves down to the ground. His arm was comfort; he was there with me every step of the way. 

Reaching up with my cleared hand; I intertwined my palm with his own. Above my shoulder as I forced a smile. “ almost there.” I whispered as i felt the throbbing on my side; the dripping of redness down my leg; I just hoped it was dark enough to hide. Enough to give us a clear out before I had to say the words. I was shot; a haunting thought as I saw Kie and Pope in sight. 

“ Once we step down one last step, run to the gates, there’s a boat waiting okay. I’ll get the keys.” I told myself it was a solid plan; despite my obvious discomfort to myself. I leaned up to press a kiss to John B’s hand lips against his thumb before I gave the nod to Kie and Pope. 

It was time to run; it was our only chance; even if it meant the Pogues leaving without me; I could handle my injury and my dad; but John B needed an escape or his life was at risk; and right now I cared less about me and more about his safety. “ Run.” Whispered as hands released his own as my body heavily dropped to the ground. Shots being fired; I leaned down enough to swat; to hide under until the walkway cleared.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I gave a nod of relief to Sarah and JJ once our feet finally hit the pavement below. Sure, I knew we still had a challenge ahead of us, even more of one now that Ward knew I had taken Sarah, so I guarantee he wasn’t the only one firing a gun currently. Now we had him, and his whole damn security department firing at us, too. Regardless, we made it this far, which to some, seemed like an impossible feat in and of itself, but we’re still alive, so that’s something. I justified optimistically as Sarah told us the next part of the plan. Good thing we managed to get her out, because JJ nor I had come up with an escape plan. In normal pogue fashion, we planned to wing it once we reached the point… You know, assuming that we made it this far, I should say] Okay, babe. [I said as I heard her instruct us to “run,” and then she released my hand. Given how close I had already come to losing her, I wasn’t about to let her out of my sight; especially in a dangerous situation like this. With that protective thought in mind, I hadn’t run far before realizing she was no longer at my side, or even behind me] Sarah? Sarah, where are you? [I asked in a hushed volume as I started to back track to find her. It didn’t take me long before I nearly tripped over her as she laid down onto the ground] What are you doing? Are you okay? [Assuming maybe she tripped and hurt herself or something, which is why she didn’t get up and continue running with us. Either way, I waited for the latest bout of gun shots to fade out before I helped Sarah up from the ground. This time snaking my arm around her to keep her close as we prepared to catch up with the others] Can you walk? [Prepared to carry her on my back if she was hurt and couldn’t run. Whatever it took to get Sarah safely out of here, I was all for doing it. Sarah’s safety and freedom was my top priority right now]

[ofnotakook]

A getaway plan; honestly Sarah could easily say she had the grounds of the priority mapped out in her head. But the times she’s visited this house she could count on her hand. It was slim; but right now she had to save herself or she risked the chance of Ward getting his hooks not just in her; but it put the pogues in danger. The same people who risked their lives in order to save her. Sarah didn’t take it for granted; she knew she was a mess. She was someone who was torn between love and her family. But she was locked in her own room on more than one occasion. Her father proved he only cared about the gold. It stung; it made Sarah feel like shit; like she wasn’t enough for her own father. 

But now wasn’t the time; the end was near. She felt her knees wobbly, she felt the lost of blood elevate against her frame. Feet planted against the pavement; her eyes scanned the grounds until they reached Kie and Poper who had keys in their hands; they found the keys to the boat under one of my rocks. It was kinda my getaway car back in the day when I wanted to be reckless; I wanted an escape; apparently it was my younger self telling me to be prepared. Because right now our best bet was to run. Run through the pavements; the mountains of trees to get to the edge. I whispered the words. JJ didn’t need any admission; he ran like hell while guns were being fired. Fired at us; which is why I ducked. Not voluntarily; I had fallen to my knees. I had fell right to the ground. I felt my lungs closing off; I felt the air in my body slowly leaving, as I felt my frame hit the ground in a huff. 

I knew John B; he’d never leave without me. I was kinda surprised he hadn’t picked up on the trail of blood I left on the roof; the ladder in my wake. But to my surprise my secret was that a secret. Eyes closed growing heavy that was until I felt his hands roll onto my own palms. Fingers curled around his hands as I slowly pushed myself back onto my feet. “ I’m okay.” A fat lie I screamed at myself. The dirty blonde moved in the threes; in the brushes; her sneakers ran across the lawn until she heard her feet against the pavement. “ John B.. If I fall behind I need you to run like hell okay.” A demand not an ask. The female whispered in a low tone as fingers tighten around his palm. “ I was shot..’ The words stuck on her tongue as she paused; glancing down to her hip; her hip where there was a big ass stain of redness under her sweater; the white sweater now red; she bit down on her lip in fear; and now she’d be the reason they got caught; from running for their lives. 

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what, I would never leave Sarah behind. She was everything to me. Including my favorite pain in the ass that I argued with like we were already a married couple. Point is, I loved Sarah more than life itself, and even though things were a bit up in the open currently between us, that didn’t matter, because I would always come for her. Case and point when I saw her drop down and without a second thought or hesitation, I went back for her and then waited until she was ready to move before we continued our escape. My face turned pale though as I could feel the blood leaving my cheeks when I heard her confession about being shot] What? You were shot? [Quietly repeating the words back to myself, as if trying to process it, but also hoping that I had heard her wrong and she’d correct me now. Judging by the blood I saw that had stained her shirt, I knew I hadn’t imagined it. My worst nightmare was happening now in the fact that Sarah was hurt] It’s going to be okay. I’ll get you out of here and then we’ll get you help. [I assured her. No way in hell of knowing if she was going to be okay or not. I mean, she was shot. With a bullet. She was bleeding, and I had no way of knowing how much blood she’s lost already, because I was just now hearing she was hurt] Let’s get you on my back, and I’ll carry you out of here. [My way of letting her know that, no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her behind, so this way, if we get caught, we’re going to do so together. I silently justified as I squatted down as low as I could, so Sarah didn’t have to strain too much to shift onto my back]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s family was the why the Pogue’s were in this mess. The why we were fighting for our life’s. Namely the finger needed to be pointed towards my father. The man who wanted to be a proud family man, adoring father was willing to aim guns at his own daughter. He chose a hell of a long time ago. I wasn’t the kook anymore; I was a pogue; the family I decided I wanted. My pure love and adoration for John B. He was my everything. The boy I wanted to bicker with day and night. The boy I wanted to run on adventures with. He understood me, I never felt alone with him; I never felt like I had to pretend. I always felt trapped, the need to run from how I felt those strong feelings until I met him. Until we kissed; and fell insanely in love. 

And this island; the gold being unreachable now; was on me. I was the one who believed in my dad; kept opening my mouth and claiming he loves me, he’d never hurt me. I was the fool a disgrace not only had my brother tried to kill me drown me, my own dad wanted me dead. I had nothing but John B and the pogue’s. They were all I needed. 

Each leg of movement was starting to cause a strain on my body. I had no issues running; it was the open wound on my abdomen that was preventing me from moving fast enough. Knees weak, I could barely keep up. I heard the others in a distant reach the boat; the boat that was gassed up; the keys I knew where they were hidden the backup keys I mean. I remembered going out on this boat as a child; for our family trips on the ocean. What an embarrassing moment now considering. Leaning over my frame; eyes staring at the grass that touched my ankles. Head moving to stare between my legs in order to catch my panting breaths. I felt weak, I said the words. And I swore I heard John B stop; he paused in disbelief but the writing was pooling down my legs; the droplets of blood obvious. Tilting my head up I bit down on my lower lip to hold in the whine the pain of my wound. “ John B..” Name lingered on my tongue as tried to find the how I’d get this boy to leave without me. Instead he decided to bend down to the ground. I hesitated, I didn’t want to hold him back. “ I..” I started but I also know this boy; he’d risk it all for me. It didn’t make sense for both of us to risk being caught here, but with last minute thinking I pulled myself onto his back. Arms wrapped loosely around his neck. Legs wrapping around his waist, once I was safely on his back I rested my head on his shoulder. “ You can move now..” I echoed in a nearly teasing retort. Keep it light; until we escaped. 

A death trap of my own making.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what happened, I would never leave Sarah behind. I wasn’t stupid. I knew us breaking into her family’s compound tonight to break her out was a death trap. It was a fool’s errand, but I didn’t care. Sarah was in danger. She might not see how deranged her father and brother are, but I knew. I saw first-hand what her psychotic father was capable of, so I wouldn’t put anything past him now. Including him hurting his own daughter just to ensure he kept her far away from me. The man was a damn lunatic and the sooner I got Sarah away from him, the better off she’d be. The driving reason I broke into her room tonight. Well, “prison” was probably a more fitting word given the bars her father had put on her windows, so she could be kept there as his prisoner. Asshole. I thought in disdain as we ran toward some semblance of safety. I stopped though when I realized Sarah was no longer behind me. Panic setting in since it was dark, which made it difficult to see. Following the sounds of her breaths and rustling through the grass as I back-tracked back toward her. Shock and fear washing over me in hearing she had been shot. A part of me wondering if taking her back to her father was the best course of action, since his ties and pull could have a doctor here in moments. Still, something told me she wouldn’t want to go back there. She’d choose to take the risk to keep moving] I’ve got you. Don’t worry. I’d never leave without you, Sarah. [I assuredly whispered out as I helped her get situated safely on my back; ensuring her arms were wrapped tightly around my neck and her legs secured around my waist before I started through the trees and such in search of JJ and the others] “John B? Where the hell are you?” [I heard the familiar sound of JJ’s voice airing out nearby in a hushed tone. Moving in the direction of his voice, I eventually caught up with them. Keeping Sarah securely on my back as we reached them] “Ready for the next part of the plan? The diversion?” [JJ asked with pride in his voice, which prompted a skeptical look from me. All of us knowing JJ wasn’t the best at plans, but I did feel better when Pope and Kie chimed in to share that they had actually helped with this part of the plan] If it gets us out of here, then hell yeah, do it! [I muttered out as I watched JJ throw a lit flare in the direction of the wooded area we had all just escaped from, before throwing two others in separate directions of the same wooded area. Listening and watching as I saw a small explosion go off, followed by another, and then countless more. Pope and Kie explaining they rigged those while they were waiting for us to break Sarah out. Chuckling in pride and feeling a momentary sense of victory as I realized we temporarily stopped Ward’s guards from catching up; prompting us to continue running the remaining way off of the compounds and then into the city. Now it was just a matter of finding a place to hide out and to get Sarah medical attention] Sarah was shot, so we need to get her to a doctor before we do anything else. [I explained to the others; watching the wheels practically turning in their head on how to work this one out without all of us ending up getting caught]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s greatest fear was her friends, was the boy she loved getting hurt on her behalf. She always believed in the good in her father; that he had made mistakes. But when it came to their family he always held their best interest at heart. But all the evidence was staked against him. He faked his own death; he was okay with putting his arms around my neck. He was okay with shooting a bullet not knowing where it land. And Sarah was caught in that crossfire. She was scared that her now slow pace would hurt the pogues in the end. Her new Family. And she knew better than to fight with John B, than to plead with him to keep going without her. He’d never leave her behind. He was noble, he was the man that loved her more than his own life. 

And she’d risk it all for him too. He was the light in her new darkness. Sarah tried to hide it; the trail of blood she now kept behind her. She held the wound to her hip as tightly as she could; until she fell. She fell forward breathing heavily feeling the impact of loss blood. She was trying to move forward in the deep grass; but her feet stopped. She had hoped the male had moved far enough forward to forget; about her. But his voice was like a compass calling her home. And she had to smile to herself as she pulled herself onto his back. Bitting down on her lip knowing she was in pain; that pain in her side, the pool of blood that was now hitting his shirt. Head slowly came to rest on his shoulder; weakness inside of her. “ I know..” She whispered in a weakened tone. She held on for dear life; she had her arms wrapped around his neck, and her legs slid around his waist; a sense of safety; as we neared the spot where the others were. 

The night was dark; no one noticed her pale face; the weaken state she was in. Another phase to the plan? Her eyes trailed over to the smirks of her friends; the explosions that they had in fact thrown in the direction of each guard growing on their tails. A small smirk tugged at her lips. Severs Ward right, to come for family; and you get burned. The others glanced at her; as the elephant in the room was exposed. She was shot; weak; blood pooling out of her as she spoke. “ I’m fine.” She said as she rested her head back down on his shoulder. She vaguely heard JJ make a plan. “ We run into town. There’s abandoned buildings, maybe we find a doctor office on our way.” It wasn’t settle or optimistic in any form; but maybe if we found supplies; I could stitch up my own wound. I had no desire to see a doctor again; nor could we trust any person wouldn’t go running to Ward. So I had barely said a word; leaving the decision up to John B; he was the fighter; the leader in this mess. I’d trust him; I’d follow him anywhere.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I nodded in response to JJ’s suggestion. No offense to my best friend, or anything, but when he came up with plans, they usually crashed and burned. Then again, his idea to break Sarah out wasn’t his worst plan. Mind you, she did get shot as a result of the escape, but I don’t know if I can necessarily blame JJ’s plan for that, or just pin the blame on Ward for being a deranged and psychotic piece of shit] I think heading toward the town is a good idea, but Sarah definitely needs a doctor. Kai, you still have the fake IDs we had made up for all of us, right? [Kai nodded in response while flashing me a confused look] Okay, so if we go to a doctor’s office or hospital, we can use the fake IDs, so Sarah’s identity doesn’t get back to her father. Either way, we need to get the bullet out of Sarah, and get her stitched up. That’s our first priority once we get off of this property. [I explained. Knowing Sarah was getting weaker from the blood loss, so the sooner we got her gunshot wound tended to, the more at ease I would feel that she’s going to be okay. Honestly, at this point in time, my only concern was Sarah. I kept that thought to myself though, because I knew if I startled to unravel with worry, everyone else would begin unraveling too. Bottom line, we weren’t going to make it out of this situation alive if we didn’t remain level headed and make the right decisions]

[ofnotakook]

Right decisions; was it ever in our nature? To be smart, to not lead on impulse? In the short time Sarah spend with John B and the pogues, she’s learned JJ and John B tended to make decisions on a whim. They tended to come up with a plan and without thinking ran with it. Granted it Sarah owed her life to the poges, she owed the idea that she was released from the bars of her own bedroom due to them. And she appreciated the fact given the limbo state the male and myself were tethered into that they risked it all for me. The wrath from my dad; the Camerons’s who I was learning spelled terrible news. Sarah always believed in her dad; the type of man he was. He was kind, he cared about his family wanted to provide for us. But the money the power it gave a person it tended to steamroll you into a horrible person. Sarah couldn’t believe her eyes; the lengths her dad was willing to go, harming his own daughter, embedding Rafe despite his own crimes. She felt disgusted with her own family. The blonde knew where she belonged; where her heart was. Holding onto dear life to the man she currently had her arms wrapped around. 

The blonde let nimble fingers graze over the thin layer of his shirt; the weak grip she held. Her wound was obvious, the blood pooling down her leg. Ward got her damn good. And Sarah hated her fate was on the edge of a line. Doctors wasn’t an option, she knew this island. She knew Ward was probably on a warpath now for blood. Pogues won by letting my escape happen, and now he’d be paying off any source he could, to get his hands on me. 

The female listened despite her own body was fading, head rested upon his head; the comfort of his scent, she was always safe with him. Eyes blinked open and closed, and she slowly let her weaken vision take in the pogue’s who glanced in every direction Smoke of the explosion was all in the air, intoxicating. “ Go South, we get on the boat, and port half way down the island, there’s a hidden office, our best bets is escaping this house.” A thought for food; a hidden doctors office; one that may get me home sailing. 

Without the risk of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised that, in spite of her condition, Sarah was the one to air out the best and most sensible plan. Giving a nod in response as I looked toward JJ and the others] You heard her. Head south. [I said in agreement as I continued carrying Sarah on my back as we all made route south toward the docks. Knowing our risk was still higher than not of getting caught, but she was right… If we had a chance of getting out of here and to freedom, this was the one with the best odds. More than anything though, I just wanted to get her somewhere safe, so she could get some medical attention. I could hear by how weak her voice was that she was losing a lot of blood. The longer this continues, the worse her chances of survival were. Once we reached the docks, we ducked into the shadows until reaching the boat. I made sure to get Sarah on safely, and then I laid her down across one of the seats to rest, while I helped JJ and Pope to untie the ropes; all the while Kai started up the boat. Knowing we’d all need to work together, and to do so quickly, or else we weren’t getting out of here alive] Okay, Kai, we’re clear. Get us the hell out of here. [I called out to her as me and the other guys pushed the boat away from the dock to give it an oomph and then once the boat was cleared from the sides, I returned to Sarah] How bad is it? [I asked as I grabbed the first aid kit stowed under the one seat. Not that I could do much with my incredibly limited experience and knowledge, but I felt helpless by not doing what I could for her now. Besides, if I could at least slow the bleeding, that would give her the best fighting chance to stay alive until we were able to get her medical attention]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt like she had lost everything. She used to be the girl who would always go to the beck and call of her dad; he used to be the incredible man she grew up with. He used to be the man who read bedtime stories to her. He used to give her a glass of milk each time. She had so many fond memories of him. But now; it felt like those memories were tainted. Sarah had always believed in him, she fought the urges to go against him. Seeing his boat explode it destroyed her; she broke up with John B the man she loved for him, because he was glad the man who took his father away got justice. Was dead. And suddenly it felt like our love wasn’t meant to be. 

And now Sarah was bleeding out because of the man who was supposed to protect her. He shot fire at her; at her friends not caring of the consequences. That was the sadness of the reality. That I was alone. I couldn’t turn to my sister, I couldn’t protect. I had to put myself first, and that was the pogues my made family. We lift each other up, we go to bat for each other. And I knew the high stakes. I knew what my father was capable of. I had to wonder how I had any ounce of love for him after what he’s done. Lying to protect Rafe, letting my brother get away with attempting to drown me, he let me get drugged. He’d rather put harm to me than take accountability. And I had to swallow that truth. With a heavy head I felt like my vision was becoming blur as I spurred the last task at hand. Hands loosen on the grip against John B’s shirt, as my eyes drifted shut. How long had we walked? Before I heard the rustling of feet hitting the docks. And I felt my body being dropped gently into the boat, back pressed against a hard backing on the edge. Slowly eyes lifted seeing blurs. 

Figures moving left and right; the “ Ropes done.” I heard from JJ as both boys plopped themselves down on the boat. Pope was at the wheel with Kie, I heard the soft whispers of nothingness. And I heard his voice, the one that always dragged me home. And I wanted to be honest, as my hand slowly nimbly moved against the dam fabric of my sweater as I lifted it up. And I saw it the blood, it was dark, and it explained why I felt faint. Turning my eyes to the man I loved; John B was preparing to bandage up the wound for a short time. “ It doesn’t look pretty, I’ll have a nasty scar if anything.” I aired out attempting to lighten the mood as I felt the boat move as if it was full of lighten. 

This remembered me of when I saved his ass, when we first started out; on our little adventure. A shy grin turned against my lips as I spoke. “ Last time one of us had to bandage the other up, I was sneaking you into the house, I saved your ass, are we finally repaying the favor?” I asked with a sense of teasing in my voice. Definitely not the time, but I needed a laugh a small brief moment for just us.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Although I knew now wasn’t the time for jokes and quips, I still appreciated the fact that Sarah was trying to keep the mood light between us. Maybe if the circumstances had been reversed, I would have been all for cracking jokes… Hell, I would more than likely be cracking them too. Given that Sarah had been shot and was rapidly losing blood though, I definitely wasn’t in a fun and games kind of mindset. For her sake though, I did flash her a grin as I leaned down to press a tender kiss to her forehead] Well, I figured I owed you so it was high time I stepped up and returned the favor. Maybe next time you want me to save you though, let’s go with something that involves less blood shed and need for panic… Deal? [Giving it my best effort to joke in return. In the meantime I grabbed the first aid kit. My hand shaking slightly as I quickly fished around for some bandaging and things I thought I could use to stop the bleeding] Either way, I’m putting you in charge of keeping an eye on me to make sure I’m doing this right. I mean, doctor stuff is new territory for me so I’ll need the supervision. All that to say, eyes open at all times, okay? [My casual way of requesting to Sarah that I wanted her to keep her eyes open. Afraid that if she closed them and fell asleep, I might lose her. A thought that I couldn’t bear to consider as I started to do what I could to apply pressure to her wound and then applied some gauze and then bandaging too, all in an effort to stop the significant bleeding she was currently experiencing]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was well aware of the bleeding that now wasn’t the time for her humor, for her need to crack a joke open. But Sarah could see how scared he was; it was in his eyes. She was scared herself that she was about to take her last breath, by the hands of her own father. Ward had no idea she was assuming that he had aimed for her; she had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. Her own father pulled the trigger; he was aiming a weapon at her friends, at the man she loved. And now she was facing deaths door; she remembered the last time. 

John B was the one aching in pain as she ran her fingers with a cold rag over his blooded wound; which is why the dirty blonde showed amusement. Or she was going nuts with the lack of blood in her system. Eyes had slowed movement as he spoke; and she knew this was his way of saying “ Stop Sarah.” As if she planned on taking a bullet tonight. But her smile soften knowing feeling the panic under his tone, and her slimmed hand; her hand reached to touch his arm as a soothing of reassurance that she was okay. “ I promise next time, I’ll tell my dad not to shoot.” She echoed with that sarcastic retort of hers. But Sarah was done with the jokes. Not that she had the energy. She felt like her body was giving out; she felt the color had now drained from her face in the dark. She barely felt the boat moving against the water; the ocean seas; the seas that used to bring soothing. That used to make her feel safe; and now she was trembling, she felt his hand on her wound; and she had glanced down the blood was soaking her skin, right through his hand. “ Use the guse to wipe around the wound, and then bandage it gently at least until we arrive.” To a doctor; assuming we had the money to get me treated; or this was the end. Her eyes landed back on his features, and she uttered an “ I love you.” As if it was the last words she’d say. 

Eyes kept fluttering open and shut in a daze, despite the promise to stay with him, to guide him through the process; she hardly felt her hand move down to her side; as if her limbs were jelly now. If only this boat would move any faster..

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I appreciated Sarah’s attempt to crack jokes now. That was kinda our thing, you could say, but at the moment, I felt far from laughing. I was worried and growing even more so with every passing second. Sarah was shot. She was bleeding out currently, and I had no way of knowing if we’d get her medical attention in time to save her] Speed up the boat! Let’s go! [I yelled out to Pope and Kie as I saw Sarah’s eyes close. Judging by the worried look on JJ’s face, I knew he was thinking the same thing I was] Hurry the hell up, JJ, and help me pack her wound. Quick, get those gauze pads from the bag! [My voice shaking in building worry as JJ did as I ordered; grabbing me what I needed as I tossed the now soiled and blood soaked gauze pads to the side as I took the clean ones from JJ’s grasp. My hand shaking as I pressed it against Sarah’s gunshot wound. After what felt like a damn eternity, the boat pulled to a stop. I didn’t exactly know where we were at the moment, but at this point Pope and Kie were tying off the boat to the pier, so it wouldn’t go anywhere, and then they rushed toward us] “Come on. I got word that there’s a surgeon in town who handles cases like this for the right price.” [Pope explained which prompted my brows to furrow in confusion] “Get Sarah, let’s go.” [Kie instructed, which prompted me to tape off the currently gauzed padding I had in place, then JJ helped me to lift Sarah carefully out of the boat and onto the pier. Once JJ and I were on the pier, I cradled Sarah securely in my arms] “Here, take this bag. It should be enough to get her treated. Pope and I will stay with the boat.” [Kie said as JJ grabbed the bag and the address of the warehouse doctor, and then we rushed through the dark night air toward the provided address. A less than ideal situation from all angles given Sarah’s condition and the fact that we were in an unfamiliar place looking for the location of a doctor that we knew nothing about. Talk about a wild card move, at its best] Stay with me, Sarah. We’re going to get you help. Keep fighting. [I called out to her as JJ barked out instructions and I merely kept up with his pace as I carried Sarah in my arms toward our destination]

[ofnotakook]

A scar that might kill me. 

It was a thought for Sarah; she felt like she’d been through the ringer. Her own family was willing to sacrifice her for their own benefits. Sarah once thought the world of her father; of the family. But now she knew the truth they only craved the wealth they’d stomp on anyone who dared to stand in their way. Sarah’s own brother tried to drown her, and now her father was the one who pulled the trigger. Obviously he was aiming for John B, but Sarah knew she’d always end up in the cross fire. 

Not that she cared, she’d rather die than live without him. The words she said that night; on the smaller boat, as John B fought for his life, to escape the death sentence. And I meant it; I loved John B and yeah we fought; we ended up screaming at each other. But i’d do anything to be with him, and now as I was fighting for my own life; I only hoped the pogues survived. Sarah was falling unconscious, she had felt her body shutting off. The last words she spoke were of love, an undenying world of love for him. But she felt the blood lost. She felt her wounds becoming fetel. And she heard the urgent, the eagerness in her man’s voice as she felt the vague packing of her wound. How long had it been? 

She had no idea, because she felt darkness overcome her. She felt like she was falling into limo. She barely felt John B and JJ as they wrapped her sim arms around their shoulders and held her up. Enough to look like Sarah was walking, but she was dragged towards the clinic, and she barely heard the exchange when the surgeon called the three up. And with each step, she felt a slight ache in her body. An ache she wanted to subside. But Sarach knew she had to fight; to live, to open her eyes again. She felt her frame fall to a bedding; as her head hung down as the surgeon whispered. “ It’ll be okay, fight.” And She fel the breathing tube come to her nose, she felt the bleeding that was exposed. The doctor mumbled a few words to her friends. “ Do you have the money? She may not live.” He uttered and I felt my body weak. My own shadow breathing as my eyes slowly woke, for a second to see the unfamiliar surroundings, the walls brown. The tubes connected to me, I was scared. But I couldn’t move before my eyes went shut all over again. 

The doctor took the money and he soon took a tool; to save me, if it did any good, because right now I felt like I was on the brink of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

“Yeah, man. Here.” [JJ aired out in response to the shifty doctor’s request for money, before handing him a bag with money in it. My eyes shifted into a roll watching the doctor count it. So much for a moral code to save a life. Apparently all this asshole cared about what money] Just save her. Please. [I aired out pleadingly as I held Sarah’s hand with my one hand; all the while gently stroking back the hair from her face with my free hand. After a moment or so the doctor seemed satisfied with the amount of money JJ gave him inside that bag, and then he began. Watching as he first put Sarah under with what I assumed to be some kind of anesthesia before he grabbed a questionable looking scalpel so he could begin making the first cut. I knew in my gut that trusting this doctor might be the worst idea we’ve ever had, but at the same point, our hands were tied. It was either this option or we’d lose Sarah. Sure, his “she may not live” statement didn’t leave me with much confidence in his skills, but I had to believe in Sarah now. Sarah was strong. She was brave. If anyone could fight this, it was her] Come on, baby. Fight this. Don’t you dare leave me. Fight, baby. Fight. [I gently pleaded in her ear before pressing a tender kiss to her forehead] “Keep watch.” [I heard the doctor instruct of JJ before giving me a knowing sort of look and then a nod] “Here we go.” [The doctor said in less than a confident tone as he made the first cut; taking the scalpel across Sarah’s skin in order to remove the bullet from her body. It was excruciating to watch, but I promised myself that no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her side] “Grab those gauze pads and some gloves. Pour some of that vial with sanitizing solution directly over the incision spot and then place the gauze pads firmly across the area to slow her bleeding. We don’t want her losing more blood than she already has.” [The doctor instructed; forcing me to release Sarah’s hand, so I could assist in the surgery. After what felt like an eternity, he finished; managing to remove the bullet and then to seemingly successfully repair damage to her wounded organ internally. Once he finished, he stitched her up then covered the wound with a significant amount of gauze pads and medical tape] “It’s a wait and see, at this point, so let’s hope she’s a fighter.” [The doctor said while washing his hands in the sink in the corner of the room] She is. [I flatly said in response before removing my gloves and washing my own hands once the doctor had finished. After ensuring my hands were clean, I returned to the table where Sarah rested and I took her hand in my own] You’re a fighter, Sarah. The strongest person I know, so fight this. I’m not going anywhere. [I had no way of knowing if she could hear me, but I didn’t care. On the off chance that she could, I was going to remind her of her strength and ability to fight this now]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt the screams into darkness. She felt like she was on a cloud in limo. She had no control of her body; she felt like she was paralyzed. She didn’t have the power to move, she barely felt her body being held up. She didn’t want to die, she didn’t want to be traped in her own bedroom. She never asked her own father to shoot bullets at her and her friends. Sarah suddenly felt like her once simply life was a cycle of nightmares. Death on our door steps, the rush of running; being on the med. Sarah knew her getting shot was her fault. If she had just listened to John B weeks ago; that Ward didn’t have my best interest at heart. 

If I had stayed with Pogues instead of trusting my now psychic family. One trying to kill me left and right. Sarah had learned her lesson, the only people she could count on was herself, the pogues, even her sister she just hoped her sister was okay. She knew she was stipid to be thinking about anyone but herself now. But she held sympathy for others. The aching in her body was enough to force her to scream in pain if she wasn’t knocked out. She vaguely heard the way her body gently was placed down on a mental table.  I vaguely felt John B his breath in my ear as he tried to reassure me I was okay, I was a fighter. I was in my own little bubble. The darkness in my lids, the way my body was lifeless, especially as the doctor did insert his tool into my body, if I was awake I’d be screaming. I barely felt it; probably from the anesthesia. I couldn’t move, I had no idea how long I was out. I could vaguely hear the voices as the doctor echoed out it would be touch and go. Would I be surviving? Was I still bleeding out? Sarah felt the stirs in her mind as she laid still. Baby, fight.. Words echoed in my ears. 

John B, he needed me, he needed me to be strong, to fight through the blood lost. I couldn’t let him down. I was groggy when I suddenly felt the strength to open my eyes. The small light above me it flashed my eyes forcing me to squit, and I felt John B’s head on my stomach, not on the wounded skin, but right under. I was aching as I let out a soft wine. My hand pale as I lowered my hand onto his dirty brown locks, fingers slowly combed through his hair. “ John B.” I echoed in a whisper; I couldn’t speak and I noticed JJ was sitting in the chair, eyes closed, even JJ stayed. A made family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Hours passed by and there was no change. Sarah was so still and I had no way of knowing if she’d ever wake up. The doctor didn’t sound hopeful. Made a snide remark about her chances of pulled through as he greedily took our money and then ran like hell like some kind of coward. Clearly it was all about money for him. As more time passed, I found my head resting against Sarah’s side. Near her incision but not close enough to cause any further damage. I just wanted and needed to be close to her now. JJ wasn’t far away. He took a look out to make sure Ward nor any of his men were nearby before he’d return to the private room here and take a seat in the chair adjacent from where Sarah and I rested now. I didn’t know how much more time had passed… Felt like an eternity even though I knew it was probably just a few more hours, but eventually I heard the faint sound of her voice, as well as felt her fingers rustle gingerly through my hair. At that my head immediately shot up and I looked at her. Relief flooding my face and expression currently] You’re awake! Thank God! [I uttered out in evident relief as I pressed a gentle kiss to the back of her hand] How are you feeling? The black market doctor left a few things for pain if you need it. [The guy wasn’t exactly reliable but he did seem to save Sarah’s life, so at the moment, I was thinking a bit more favorably of him. Maybe he wasn’t a total money-hungry quack after all. Jury was still out on that one though] Do you want some water? [I asked as I had already picked up a fresh bottle of water; prepared to give her some if she was thirsty]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt weak, she ha no idea as to how long she’d been laying her. The memory of her father; of how easily he had aimed a gun at her, at her friends because of what? Jealousy? Because he wanted to hold this wild control over her? Sarah had once desired to please her family. She had once idolize her father the memory of us at the docks when I was only a little girl it clouded who I knew he was. 

But a few hours before he was so willing to throw me under the bus. He was so willing to let me bleed out on our yard. Because of his hate for the Pogues. I was hurt, I was feeling betrayed but at the same time, relieved as I felt my body come to life. I felt my eyes lift open as I adjusted to the dim light. I saw JJ in the corner as my eyes peeled over to John B who had his head rested against my palm. And I knew I was lucky, he was here. He loved me, and I had to let my fingers run soothingly through his dirty blonde locks. A small smile peeled at my lips. And I knew I couldn’t move. I felt numb to my core as my body was now healing from the blood lost, Sarah wasn’t going to jump up, the fear of Ward on our tail was aching against my own skin. The blonde had peered up at him; the man she loved so much. 

“ I’m okay.” As okay as I was going to be. The wound had been deep, the stitched up wound was felt as my eyes slowly moved to the man I loved. My hand moved to reach for John B. And I felt a sigh of relief escape my own lips. And I felt my gaze linger on him. “ I’m sorry, I’m sorry my dad is a crazy,” My words could never compare to the pain my family has caused him, the pogues and I wanted to do my part to mend those fences. “ Yes.” I echoed to the option of water my throat felt dry but I wasn’t going to jump forward, I slowly lifted my head up to get to a sitting position. My free hand had moved to my side, knowing the pain; the wound my own family caused.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I felt mounds of relief when I heard Sarah’s voice. She was alive. She was awake, and she was speaking. Lifting her hand to my lips as I pressed a couple of kisses to the back of her hand, then gently lowered her hand back down onto the metal table she was lying on] Hey, don’t apologize. It’s not your fault. All that matters is keeping you safe and away from your deranged family. [No matter what, I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t let Ward harm Sarah again. I thought to myself as I brought a fresh bottle of water to Sarah’s lips, so she could drink as much as she wanted and needed. I knew she needed time to rest and heal, but the sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better I could guarantee her safety from her family. One could hope, at least. I mean the way Ward operated, and the fact that he knew people all over the world, I wasn’t sure exactly how far remote we would need to go, and for how long either for that matter, in order to keep Sarah safe, but no matter what, I’d do what it takes. I came close to losing Sarah this time… Too close for comfort, so I wasn’t willing to take any chances with her safety again. At least not until Ward was no longer a threat to her] Once you’re well enough, we’re going to get you out of here. Pope and Kie are keeping an eye on the boat, and when you’re strong enough, we’re all getting on that boat, and getting as far away as possible. We figure with some distance and preferably some place off the grid, eventually your father will stop looking for you. [Maybe wishful thinking since Ward wasn’t one who took well to losing, but one could hope he’d eventually give up and accept that Sarah was gone]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah kept asking herself the obvious how she’d been blind. How she was capable of still holding a torch of love for her family. With all the crimes all the ways her own brother tried to murder her; sending drug mules her way, being the one that nearly drowned her to death. And now her own father; was so mad at the Pogues so terrified of losing his daughter to the pogues; not wanting to lose the fight that he aimed and shot me. The blood that once covered her fingertips, the blood the redness that ran over her sweater, it was an image Sarah couldn’t erase.  

Her friends, her boyfriend? Cut into the crossfires because of her fucked up  family. And even now as she opened her eyes; said a few words, she felt the aching on her wound, damn that stitch is gonna hurt like hell. But it was comforting to feel his touch, to witness his lips touching her knuckles once again. John B, he was her anchor that kept her whole. A soften expression; a smile curled at the corners of her lips as she saviored his touch; his lips against her skin. “  They drugged me, they forced me here. I feel trapped like no one is safe in that house, but my sister..”  A fear for the little Cameron it rocked me whole now, as I felt the lump forming in my throat. Wheezie she was innocent had no idea who’s roof she was living under. Like myself; I’d been blinded from the truth. But now my father was deranged; he passed off onto Rafe; and Rose was clueless as ever a pond in the game; until she crossed Ward. 

A slight cough was heard; as the blonde felt the wetness hit her tongue, one sip of water turned into half the bottle until she released the top from her lips and she slowly sat herself up, her palms hitting the metal of the table to hold herself up. Nuts insane considering her own wounds she wore. But her eyes ran along John B’s features with ease. “ You know he won’t let that happen. He blames you the pogues for his princess no longer being in his care. I’m a game for him to win..” A sad truth, an ached formed in her chest now.  “ I wouldn’t blame you if you allowed the pogues to leave me here for  dust to get away. I don’t want to bring you down, or put you and pogues in danger..” Not again the words hid  at the tips of her tongue. 

Danger; our names, but Ward he’d kill to end the war..I was terrified the lengths he’d go no matter how safe I felt with John B; he’d get hurt because of me. A pill I needed to swallow now.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, that would never happen. [I flatly replied with a matter of fact sort of shrug. Sure, I knew if this was just about Sarah, maybe JJ and the others would have high-tailed it out of here. Not necessarily Pope since he had a heart to do the right thing, but Kie was what you could say, hot and cold toward Sarah, so it wouldn’t take much for her to bail on Sarah. And well, JJ hated Kooks in general, so he had no loyalties to Sarah either. Thing was though, they all knew I’d literally die to protect Sarah, and the Pogues would always put their lives on the line to protect each other. All that to say, as long as I was staying put at Sarah’s side, the Pogues wouldn’t be going anywhere either because they’d always have my back, just like I’d always have theirs too. We fought fiercely for each other] Even if the others decided to high-tail it out of here, I’d never leave your side. Unless you tell me to go, I’m not going anywhere… [I started to say before an amused smirk followed] And even then, I can’t promise I’d actually leave. You know I’m stubborn when people try to tell me what to do. [I teased even though that was the truth] Either way, once you’re well enough, we’re all getting the hell out of here, and getting to safety together. Until then, just rest and heal. [I said as I gave her hand another gentle squeeze. My way of reassuring her that we were all in this together; no matter what the outcome]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah knew her choices  as of late not only disappointed herself but those around her. Sarah never wanted the wealth, she never wanted to be accepted as the princess Kook. That title had been given to her. People made assumptions about her; her personality; how she followed the kook business, and yes once upon a time she was a kook. Bu from that one day running around with John B at chapel Hill, helping him seek answers to a quest she had no idea how over our heads we were. We were just kids running around aimlessly. But I saw that treasure hunting look in his eyes; the way his eyes lit up at a map, and I mused, I admired who John B. And he made me want more for myself. 

One day; one rain kiss on the docks was all it took for the dirty blonde to feel hooked. He’s who she loved, and even with death upon us; my dad probably having a search squad on our heads. I had let the pogues down; when I had let John B go, I was angry, I was sad when I thought my dad died, and john B was just so glad to see him fall through the cracks. My dad was money hungry, he was awful he killed, he allowed Rafe to get away with Murder, but he was my dad; but now as I groggily came out of my unconscious state; I remembered the cage I felt locked in. I recalled his aim, the gun shot wound that should’ve killed me. My own father aimed the trigger, and right now Sarah knew in her gut she was a pogue, and she appreciated the friendships she made. Eyes glanced over for comfort to the boy that made her heart race. And her pinky found his; a trace of her finger against his own. 

“ I made that mistake once, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for letting you go John B, I was..” Pausing briefly before a sigh could be heard escaping her lips. “ I was hurting, I didn’t want to believe my dad was this monster. I know you said you’ve always got me, but I wouldn’t blame you if you decided no one chances.” Chances to love me, to be together after this horror war my dad had, all the times guns aimed at us because of him, a war he wanted to win on behalf of me. One he already lost. 

Because my heart; who I was, it was a pogue; my known family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I get it, Sarah. Before I came into your life and opened your eyes to who your dad and brother really are, you had a really tight bond with your dad. Naturally you’d want to fight to protect his reputation. It only makes sense that you wouldn’t want to believe your dad was capable of something like that. If the situation was reversed, and it was me in your shoes, I probably would have done the same thing as you. [I admitted honestly. It was the truth. If this was my dad, I would have fought to protect his reputation too. It’s what you do for the people you love. I’d do it for Sarah and the pogues too because I consider them my family. No matter what, I’d always have their backs, just like I know the pogues would have mine] You’ll never run out of chances with me, Sarah. I hate to break it to you, but I love you, so until you say otherwise, you’re stuck with me. [As much truth as there was in my words, I aired out that honesty with a joking tone] Anyway, for now, we just need to get your strong enough that we can move somewhere safer for the duration of your recovery. [I knew where we were would suffice for now, but it would only be a matter of time before Sarah’s dad figures out we’re hiding out here currently. We’d cross that bridge if and when the time comes. For now I wanted Sarah to get a little stronger and heal up a bit before we decide to move her]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah had always been privileged growing up. She knew of the different layers of the island. She never wanted to believe in herself to judge others; the living, how some had to work harder than others. But Sarah was guilty to pulling away when it felt messy and difficult. When someone got too close to her; she was the one guilty of running. The fear of being seen truly. It’s what happened with her friendship with Kie, and it was easy to blame the split on how John B reacted to her father’s then death. But the truth was Sarah was scared. 

Scared of letting go of the shielded life she lived, the ground beneath her gone. Her family shattered into pieces. Her dad wasn’t the man she once admired. He was a monster; he felt threatened he knew I wasn’t under the spell, and he tried to hurt me. My own brother tried to kill me, did I feel safe with my family? No I was shot because of my dad, and now I felt the numbness against my skin. The numbness that tingled the layer of my stomach; where the scars stood. I wouldn’t blame John B if he wanted to cut loses here, and leave me stranded. But I knew him his heart; the good boy inside of him; the boy I loved with every fiber inside of me. “ It’s not about him anymore. I knew who he was; he wasn’t the dad I once laughed with on the beach when I was a little girl, he knew he lied, he knew what he did, and my brother is protecting him. I’m sorry for the pain my family caused you.” The pogues hanging onto my lips. 

Hearing the words; unlimited chances hung in the air. I love you; and I loved him, I wouldn’t let the male get away from me again. Sarah tried her best to master the pain, the smile heated against brims as her hand grasped hold of his fingers. “ I love you.” words spoken as the blonde attempted to sit up using the strength of her elbows to hold her upper frame upright. But she knew staying put wasn’t an option; Ward had his minions surroundings areas; I would gasp through the pain than get caught. An intense stare hinted into my features as I spoke. “ John B.. we have to move. I can handle the pain. This island isn’t safe not with my dad, he has people..” And I knew Ward; he wanted power; to hold an angle, and us staying still didn’t feel safe; for me or the pogues.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I knew Sara was right… We had to move sooner rather than later. We were basically sitting ducks here. Ward had this whole island in his pocket, so it would only be a matter of time before he got wind of the fact that we were here. I’ll be damned if I did all this work to break Sara out of there… And then to get her the help she needed after she got shot, just for that deranged idiot to take her back to the prison he had her encamped in] Okay, if you’re sure you can handle it, we’ll move. [Worried if she busts a stitch she may bleed out though] We need to take it slow though. Be smart about this. We can’t afford you busting any stitches. If you bleed out… [I trailed off. Not even able to finish off the thought of that possibility] Let me tell JJ we’re going to move. [I said as I pressed a kiss to Sara’s forehead; letting my lips linger there for a second or two before I broke away. It was almost like I didn’t want to let her out of my sight; fearful I’d lose her] Be right back. [I promised as I briefly and reluctantly left the table she was resting on in order to find JJ, who was keeping watch just outside] We’re moving. We need to get off of this island. Alert the others. [JJ agreed; immediately pulling out his phone to message the others to get the boat ready for our momentary departure. In seeing JJ got the ball rolling on that, I returned to Sara. Preparing to move her once she gave me the okay. I still felt unsettled about us leaving, but at least night had set in, so that would give us the advantage as we used the darkness, shadows, and any alleyways we could find to our advantage] Just tell me when, and I’ll help you off the table.

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was embarrassed of who her family was now. It used to be a loving home, used to be a place of safety. The countless family dinners outside on the docks by the grills. The countless boat rides we had. The loving embraces from her dad; he used to be a home for her. And now when she thought about Ward all she felt was anger, betrayal. Someone who only cared about greed, he went out of his way to coverup a death, to frame John B, and now he even if it was an accident he shot me. I was stitched up because of him. All that to say; I didn’t want to be stuck on this island for one more minute. I was on edge, my hand touching the bandaged wound, as I felt the pain. We’re sitting ducks; Ward had his minions all over the island; it was possible he’d be hunting me down. This was a lowkey office; and I doubted this bystander of a doctor was on the payroll. 

I was aching, I didn’t want the drugs, but I also had to put the pogues first; John B first. They came to Nassau for her, Sarah didn’t care if she was limbing in pain whimpering as she sped up to walk as long as we ended up on that boat and made our way back to OBX a home, a new safety. We’d find a way to the gold; our rightful place of earnings. Sarah could see the concern written on John B’s face now, but she was okay. A smile of reassurance coming from her now. She laid kept on the metal table now, as she nodded, biting down on her lower lip to hold out on any pain. “ I promise, slow and steady wins the race.” I added with a joke, Sarah found her more humours side with him. The touch of his lips on her forehead, it made her insides turn, the butterflies now. Sarah had waited until John B had stepped outside to inform JJ before she was able to slowly sit back up. Damn the shooting pain that ran up her side. Deep breaths, Sarah was about to move to step down from the table when she heard her boyfriend, A soft brave smile came to her lips. Reaching out her hand to grasp hold of his arm for support. “ We need to move. I’m ready.” Her stitching may not be; but I could rest once we got safety; but until the docks came into view the dirty blonde wouldn’t feel at ease. 

An unsettling feeling at the pit of her stomach.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn't at all surprised the second I offered my help to Sarah once she was ready, she didn't hesitate to take my hand. Anybody else would be feeling sorry for themselves and their situation, but not Sarah. She was a total bad ass. By far, the bravest person I knew. Thing was though, I hated moving her. She nearly bled out and died after being shot. Her stitches were the only thing keeping her from doing so now, so what she needed more than anything was to rest and heal. Problem was, her deranged father and his entourage of employees that would be on the look out for us. I didn't like having to move her from here, but it was either this, or get caught by her father's people. Neither outcome was ideal, which was why I left the final choice up to Sarah. Her answer clear as day when she held out her hand and took a hold of my arm for support] I can carry you. I'll do the whole slow and steady thing... Taking your word on the winning the race part you joked about. [Flashing her an amused grin. Knowing now wasn't the time for fun and jokes, but maybe we both needed a little light humor given the shitty circumstances we were facing. I silently told myself as I helped her off the metal table she was lying across and then kept a secure hold on her until she was steady on her feet] You good? [Needing to know she was okay before I made any further movements or plans]

[ofnotakook]

I can always trust in you

@apogueforlife 

I can always trust in you 

Trust; it had to be earned. Love; it had to be developed. For Sarah she always had her guard up. Each time she’d get close to letting someone in the other shoe would drop, she’d freeze up, and run in the other direction. With each boyfriend she ever had she had the urge to run. To distant herself when she felt like she was trapped. When she felt the pressure to feel more than what she did. Topper he liked the idea of her. He loved the idea of being with her; but he wasn’t in love with her. 

There’s only one boy Sarah loved; and that was John B. It happened unexpectedly. It happened on a day she never saw coming. That day stayed with her. The day we went to chapel hill; the day we had fun dressing each other up. The day we pretended to be our alter egos; Val and Vlad. It was nice to be herself. I didn’t feel the pressure to be perfect. I didn’t feel like my family was watching me, I was myself. I felt safe, I felt like John B saw me despite all the flaws I had. He loved me for me, and I loved him. It was a roller coaster of a relationship if you asked me. We had gone from barely knowing each other; to falling completely utterly in love. I gave up my kook card for him. I knew the obsluces we’d be facing now, the pogue’s vs the kook. But nothing made me question my loyalty to him. To the Pogues. It got messy with my dad; him being the reason Big John was gone. The reason why the gold was taken. The reason I was on the run with John B. The gold felt so close yet so far. We managed to clear John B’s name but that’s because Ward decided in his best interest to fake his own death and act like the hero. The guy that claimed to have been a killer in order to protect his own son. Rafe just the thought of being near him made me sick to my stomach. For a second I was upset, I felt like my whole body ached when I witnessed the boat blow up. When I witnessed my father shatter beyond the sea. And that’s when I saw the truth; what led to us being torn apart; what led to John B and I no longer being together. He had been happy to ward dead; and I couldn’t exactly find the words to blame him. He took everything from him. But at the end of the day; he was my dad. I was hurting and I remembered that look all too well; the look of proudnessI felt like I was seeing another person. I was grieving the dad I once looked up to, to the dad that I was once his princess. I needed John B to hold me, to make me feel like it was always going to be okay. But it suddenly felt like us it wasn’t meant to be.. 

Walking away for yourself; was all you could do. It was hard to be near him; to be pulled back into the adventure; to the cross. But for Pope I’d be there; awkwardness assured. Sarah didn’t know if she should make eye contact with him; or just stay silent. Silence seemed better; until that night; we had a plan to get the cross from Rafe; the big truck was parked outside my house. JJ and Pope were hidden behind the bushes. I was determined to walk inside; to get the key to unlock the truck; how we’d get the heavy cross out was a big ass story of it’s own. But I had made two steps to the gates, one glance backwards; I saw him John B was about to get up; and for a second I found myself hopeful; maybe this was the moment of the unknown. What comes next? Dark hues met for a second and I swore the air was taken out of my lungs; but he didn’t budge, didn’t move. Giving me the indication we had nothing left to say. That was the last memory I had of him; of us staring at each other. 

Head leaned against the gated up windows of my room at the barbados house, The house I was locked into. The boat felt like a nightmare; I was drugged by my own family. Rose had put a drug in my tea. Rafe and had helped her execute the plan; to force me here against my will. I remembered telling Ward when he claimed John B only cared about the treasure about the gold that I was just stuck in the cross hair that he was wrong. That John b would find him and come for him once I went missing. How wrong had I been? I wanted to blink back the tears that dared to fall. I was a pogue at heart; I chose it for John B because I loved him, despite our differences he’d always have a permanent place in my heart. It had been weeks since we left on the boat, I had tried to zone out the conversations of my parents; I had pretended to be sleeping at times, but here once I had been pulled into my room I never left. I guess Ward was afraid I’d run, or threaten to tell the cops his own daughter was kidnapped against her will. Give or take. Sarah swallowed the lump in her throat; it had gotten dark. She smelt the tray of food that her sister left her outside the door. Her bed was an inch away; The light pink covers still in place, it had been a day or two since we arrived, and I had slept in my bed because that meant i was okay, that meant that I was adjusting to being here; in this house. When all I wanted was to break free. At the window, on the seat where my back was pressed against the wall. Head tilted towards the window, I could see the water; any boats that passed by. I was alone; and all I could hope was that the Pogue’s were okay that perhaps my dad was right they managed to get the cross and that’s all that mattered for Pope. Eyes moved to the stars; for a moment it was nice to believe we were looking at the same stars; as if John B was on his way; assuming my dad was lying. For now all I could do was hold hope; I’d find a way out; it was a done deal. 

Tomorrow; I’d work out a plan. The Pogues would have me, if I found him. We’d always have each other. A wistful thought as a hint of a smile tainted onto my lips.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Love. Definitely not something I ever believe really existed. I always saw it more as, in life, people come and go. The ones who matter will stick with you, through thick and thin. For me, that was the Pogues: JJ, Kie, and Pope. I don’t remember a time in my life when those three weren’t part of it, and something tells me, I’ll never shake them either. Not that I’d want to, cause they’re everything to me. Then Sarah Cameron busted into my life unexpectedly… One of those surprising moments where I got myself in a sticky situation, and Sarah Cameron, of all people, was the one who bailed me out of it. Even more surprising though was how I felt when I was with her. It was the first time in my life when I found myself wanting to be with a girl exclusively. In time she even made me rethink my original theory about love. Then, well, I guess you could say life happened, and we broke up. Sure, I knew I played a part in our break up. When her father died, I should have been more supportive of the toll that loss would take on Sarah. Yeah, the guy was bad news… A lying crook, which Sarah obviously knew too, but he was still her father. Given the bad blood I had with Ward, and also the fact that he murdered my father, could you really blame me for being relieved that the guy was finally gone? Right or wrong, it’s how I felt. This leading to the end of Sarah’s and my relationship. Still, in my heart I knew this wasn’t the end for us. A love like ours always finds a way back to one another. Naïve or not, I refused to see it any other way…

Then weeks passed and I was starting to wonder if it really had been the end for us. Mind you, I still wasn’t giving up, but instead of dwelling on what may or may not happen between me and Sarah, instead the Pogues and I focused on getting the cross back for Pope. It actually became a, “Kill two birds with one stone” type of adventure for us though, since word got to me that Sarah had been abducted by her family. Them ultimately boarding a ship with Sarah and the cross, allegedly heading to Barbados; knowing that was exactly where we would be going to. This was it… This was our chance to, not only help Pope get the cross back, but also for me to rescue Sarah too…

Given that us Pogues had made some enemies, and also the fact that we didn’t have so much as a pot to piss in, much less money to travel to Barbados, it took some work, a lot of time, and even more creativity on our parts before we finally reached Barbados. Once we did, I knew we needed to devise a plan to get back both Sarah and the cross. Of course JJ, as usual, came up with one of the worst plans I had ever heard. This saying a lot considering JJ’s had some really shitty plans, over the years. This one pretty much topped the other bad plans he’s had though; prompting all of us to shoot down his plan and come up with another one. Knowing it was either come up with a better plan, or go with JJ’s plan which will likely either get us all killed, or at the very least, we’ll end up locked up in some jail cell. In time we did come up with a new plan. Not a great one, but definitely better than JJ’s plan, so it was something, at least. For our part we decided one step at a time…

We’d wait till night, rescue Sarah first, and then once we had her safely out of that house and away from her deranged family, we’d devise a plan to get the cross back. I mean, it’s not like we could just knock on the front door, and request either. Not without being shot, that is. We couldn’t even break in and steal the cross without getting caught, since it was so damn heavy, it was going to take a hell of a lot of brute strength to carry it, so we’d just deal with that plan later. For now, my focus was on Sarah. Sure, I knew there was a chance I’d be the last person she’d want to see tonight, but given me and the Pogue’s rescuing her, or her remaining a hostage with her own family, I figured I was the lesser of the evils, so to speak. I justified as Kie and Pope remained look outs from the ground; keeping hidden to the garden area where they tried to remain unseen, while JJ and I went to the roof. With JJ’s help, he hoisted me down onto the balcony I had scoped out and learned led to the bedroom they were keeping Sarah locked in. Once I approached the balcony window, I peaked inside discreetly; making sure her family was nowhere in sight before I gave a couple of light taps on the window. My way of alerting Sarah that I was here. Of course the window was pad-locked, which just pissed me off more. How could they do this to Sarah? The Cameron’s definition of family was nothing more than a load of bullshit, if you ask me, because this isn’t how you treat family. I thought in building anger as I used the pin I had with me to trigger the lock. Once I heard it click, my eyes shifted up toward JJ. The thumbs up he gave me in reply assuring me he had cut the security system like he confidently told me he could easily handle. This was JJ, so although I’d trust him with my life, and well, I had a few times, I still held my breath as I slowly and gingerly opened the window; expelling a quiet sigh of relief when an alarm didn’t sound as I opened the window] Val…? [I quietly whispered her code name into the dark bedroom. Hoping it would soften any resentment she might have in seeing me here now] Vlad and the crew are here to spring you from here… [I further whispered into the dark bedroom as I waited for her to come over to the window; knowing we didn’t have long before someone would alert the Cameron’s that the security system had been hacked into, so the sooner we got out of there, the better our chances of getting out of here alive]

[ofnotakook]

The pogue plans never went according to plan. Not that Sarah was going to complain now considering. She was able to escape the bars that locked her into her old bedroom. She was tired of starving herself out of spite. She was tired of laying awake at night in fear that she might be dragged out of bed. She was tired of being forced to live the perfect life. Forced to smile for her parents; the only one in her family she liked was her sister Wheezie, she’s who I wanted to protect. But she had young opinions, didn’t see what our family was capable of. And given how much risk John B went through to find me, I had to go with him. Not that I wanted to stay trapped or that I’d risk his life to save my sister. 

I felt torn with myself now. I escaped; I was on the roof; I had survived the lies, I had survived my own father aiming a gun at me; of course to his unknown knowledge Ward did exceed in his aiming and catching fire on one of us. I doubted his attention was to hurt me. Yet again it felt like a toss up considering, he did try to strangle me to death; and drugged me to get onto that stupid boat. But I knew him to know the problem wasn’t my stubbornness, it was John B and the pogues. He was threatened, and right now the Camerons wasn’t my family; it was the pogues. I had chose them a long time ago weather I wanted to admit it or not. 

Safe; is what I felt; despite the pain that was pooling on my side; the white sweater was making it difficult to hide. But I felt his kiss; the graze of his lips on my head, a tenderness of who we were. A love language for us. Seeing as JJ had followed my lead; and started down the ladder; I had stepped forward turning my back to where my hues fell on the male I loved with all my heart. Despite our differences that did come to light when I uttered the words maybe we weren’t meant to be, to work out. 

A soulfulness in my stare as I uttered my words. “ Promise you’ll come down.” I mouthed the words “ I can’t lose you.” As my palm wasn’t already filled with my own blood. Taking my hand from side, I placed them firmly on the handles of the ladder, with one step and than the next. I caught sight of the droplets of blood hitting the ladder as I climbed down, It wasn’t until I reached the bottom, I felt JJ; place his hand on my hip in order to help me off when he wore this stunned expression. “ Sarah.” He mouthed, I knew he felt it; the blood that now covered his hand; I shook my head. “ Don’t say a word.” I had strength I’d be okay until I couldn’t walk anymore; He was about to say something when I hit him in the chest. 

John B would be in earshot; I couldn’t tell him yet; once we were in the clear I’d tell him, but I didn’t want him to worry about me, not after all the risks he took to save me. Pushing myself to the side, I eyed the small area where our feet hit the grass; Kie and Pope had to make it to the gates; where it led to the waterfront it was our get away. Our only glimmer of hope.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I promise. I’ll be right behind you. [I assured Sarah as I watched JJ go down the ladder first, to ensure it was safe for Sarah to follow. Once JJ gave the “all clear” signal, I gave Sarah and nod to begin descending the ladder] You’ll be okay. JJ will meet you at the bottom, and I won’t be far behind. [I reminded her as she started to descend the ladder. I ducked down lower to the roof as I heard the sound of more gunshots looming in the air. Once Sarah was about halfway down the ladder, I started to position myself onto the ladder; getting a good grip on the sides before I slowly began descending the ladder too. It wasn’t long before I could faintly hear Sarah and JJ safely at the bottom on the ground below the ladder, and I was following them moments later. After I reached the bottom, I noticed the concerned look JJ was giving me, but assuming it had something to do with the fact that we were all still in danger on the Cameron’s grounds, I didn’t question JJ on his strange look. Instead, I snaked my arm gently and protectively around Sarah’s shoulder; gently tugging her closer to me before speaking up in a hushed volume] Okay, we made it this far, which is great, but we’re not out of danger yet. Let’s get to Pope and Kie, and then all of us get the hell out of here. [I suggested before nodding my head toward JJ; gesturing for him to lead the way. The sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better our chances would be of us surviving this]

[ofnotakook]

He’d be right behind me. It was a sense of comfort knowing I wasn’t alone.That I was nearly to safety but the question lingered of how long. Because I felt the bleeding on my hip, I felt the lost of blood that peeled from my skin. Not that Sarah was about to utter a word. If she did their plan of escaping would be jeopardized. And JJ and John B had risked it all for her. Kie and Pope were on the lower ground taking cover on her behalf. Sarah wasn’t selfish; she knew when to take one for the team. Her dad; his shots that were fired. It was venages for her; for the Pogues brainwashing her; but the truth was Sarah saw beneath the scars. She saw the truth. The perfect knit family wasn’t real. She had hoped her father would be okay; that he would let her go. Let the pogues go give John B what was rightfully his. 

But instead he saw me as property. I wasn’t a person to him. I was his daughter yes; but I also was my own mind and heard. All that to say I tried not to shake when I heard the gunshots in the distance. I had my hands holding onto the ladder as JJ slowly helped me down. Blood it was obvious at the edge of the ladder; I easily shook my head to JJ; indicating John B didn’t need to know. I was fine. I Swore I caught an edge of concern against his expression. Did JJ care? I asked myself as feet hit the pavement; the edge of the roof as we lowered ourselves down to the ground. His arm was comfort; he was there with me every step of the way. 

Reaching up with my cleared hand; I intertwined my palm with his own. Above my shoulder as I forced a smile. “ almost there.” I whispered as i felt the throbbing on my side; the dripping of redness down my leg; I just hoped it was dark enough to hide. Enough to give us a clear out before I had to say the words. I was shot; a haunting thought as I saw Kie and Pope in sight. 

“ Once we step down one last step, run to the gates, there’s a boat waiting okay. I’ll get the keys.” I told myself it was a solid plan; despite my obvious discomfort to myself. I leaned up to press a kiss to John B’s hand lips against his thumb before I gave the nod to Kie and Pope. 

It was time to run; it was our only chance; even if it meant the Pogues leaving without me; I could handle my injury and my dad; but John B needed an escape or his life was at risk; and right now I cared less about me and more about his safety. “ Run.” Whispered as hands released his own as my body heavily dropped to the ground. Shots being fired; I leaned down enough to swat; to hide under until the walkway cleared.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I gave a nod of relief to Sarah and JJ once our feet finally hit the pavement below. Sure, I knew we still had a challenge ahead of us, even more of one now that Ward knew I had taken Sarah, so I guarantee he wasn’t the only one firing a gun currently. Now we had him, and his whole damn security department firing at us, too. Regardless, we made it this far, which to some, seemed like an impossible feat in and of itself, but we’re still alive, so that’s something. I justified optimistically as Sarah told us the next part of the plan. Good thing we managed to get her out, because JJ nor I had come up with an escape plan. In normal pogue fashion, we planned to wing it once we reached the point… You know, assuming that we made it this far, I should say] Okay, babe. [I said as I heard her instruct us to “run,” and then she released my hand. Given how close I had already come to losing her, I wasn’t about to let her out of my sight; especially in a dangerous situation like this. With that protective thought in mind, I hadn’t run far before realizing she was no longer at my side, or even behind me] Sarah? Sarah, where are you? [I asked in a hushed volume as I started to back track to find her. It didn’t take me long before I nearly tripped over her as she laid down onto the ground] What are you doing? Are you okay? [Assuming maybe she tripped and hurt herself or something, which is why she didn’t get up and continue running with us. Either way, I waited for the latest bout of gun shots to fade out before I helped Sarah up from the ground. This time snaking my arm around her to keep her close as we prepared to catch up with the others] Can you walk? [Prepared to carry her on my back if she was hurt and couldn’t run. Whatever it took to get Sarah safely out of here, I was all for doing it. Sarah’s safety and freedom was my top priority right now]

[ofnotakook]

A getaway plan; honestly Sarah could easily say she had the grounds of the priority mapped out in her head. But the times she’s visited this house she could count on her hand. It was slim; but right now she had to save herself or she risked the chance of Ward getting his hooks not just in her; but it put the pogues in danger. The same people who risked their lives in order to save her. Sarah didn’t take it for granted; she knew she was a mess. She was someone who was torn between love and her family. But she was locked in her own room on more than one occasion. Her father proved he only cared about the gold. It stung; it made Sarah feel like shit; like she wasn’t enough for her own father. 

But now wasn’t the time; the end was near. She felt her knees wobbly, she felt the lost of blood elevate against her frame. Feet planted against the pavement; her eyes scanned the grounds until they reached Kie and Poper who had keys in their hands; they found the keys to the boat under one of my rocks. It was kinda my getaway car back in the day when I wanted to be reckless; I wanted an escape; apparently it was my younger self telling me to be prepared. Because right now our best bet was to run. Run through the pavements; the mountains of trees to get to the edge. I whispered the words. JJ didn’t need any admission; he ran like hell while guns were being fired. Fired at us; which is why I ducked. Not voluntarily; I had fallen to my knees. I had fell right to the ground. I felt my lungs closing off; I felt the air in my body slowly leaving, as I felt my frame hit the ground in a huff. 

I knew John B; he’d never leave without me. I was kinda surprised he hadn’t picked up on the trail of blood I left on the roof; the ladder in my wake. But to my surprise my secret was that a secret. Eyes closed growing heavy that was until I felt his hands roll onto my own palms. Fingers curled around his hands as I slowly pushed myself back onto my feet. “ I’m okay.” A fat lie I screamed at myself. The dirty blonde moved in the threes; in the brushes; her sneakers ran across the lawn until she heard her feet against the pavement. “ John B.. If I fall behind I need you to run like hell okay.” A demand not an ask. The female whispered in a low tone as fingers tighten around his palm. “ I was shot..’ The words stuck on her tongue as she paused; glancing down to her hip; her hip where there was a big ass stain of redness under her sweater; the white sweater now red; she bit down on her lip in fear; and now she’d be the reason they got caught; from running for their lives. 

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what, I would never leave Sarah behind. She was everything to me. Including my favorite pain in the ass that I argued with like we were already a married couple. Point is, I loved Sarah more than life itself, and even though things were a bit up in the open currently between us, that didn’t matter, because I would always come for her. Case and point when I saw her drop down and without a second thought or hesitation, I went back for her and then waited until she was ready to move before we continued our escape. My face turned pale though as I could feel the blood leaving my cheeks when I heard her confession about being shot] What? You were shot? [Quietly repeating the words back to myself, as if trying to process it, but also hoping that I had heard her wrong and she’d correct me now. Judging by the blood I saw that had stained her shirt, I knew I hadn’t imagined it. My worst nightmare was happening now in the fact that Sarah was hurt] It’s going to be okay. I’ll get you out of here and then we’ll get you help. [I assured her. No way in hell of knowing if she was going to be okay or not. I mean, she was shot. With a bullet. She was bleeding, and I had no way of knowing how much blood she’s lost already, because I was just now hearing she was hurt] Let’s get you on my back, and I’ll carry you out of here. [My way of letting her know that, no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her behind, so this way, if we get caught, we’re going to do so together. I silently justified as I squatted down as low as I could, so Sarah didn’t have to strain too much to shift onto my back]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s family was the why the Pogue’s were in this mess. The why we were fighting for our life’s. Namely the finger needed to be pointed towards my father. The man who wanted to be a proud family man, adoring father was willing to aim guns at his own daughter. He chose a hell of a long time ago. I wasn’t the kook anymore; I was a pogue; the family I decided I wanted. My pure love and adoration for John B. He was my everything. The boy I wanted to bicker with day and night. The boy I wanted to run on adventures with. He understood me, I never felt alone with him; I never felt like I had to pretend. I always felt trapped, the need to run from how I felt those strong feelings until I met him. Until we kissed; and fell insanely in love. 

And this island; the gold being unreachable now; was on me. I was the one who believed in my dad; kept opening my mouth and claiming he loves me, he’d never hurt me. I was the fool a disgrace not only had my brother tried to kill me drown me, my own dad wanted me dead. I had nothing but John B and the pogue’s. They were all I needed. 

Each leg of movement was starting to cause a strain on my body. I had no issues running; it was the open wound on my abdomen that was preventing me from moving fast enough. Knees weak, I could barely keep up. I heard the others in a distant reach the boat; the boat that was gassed up; the keys I knew where they were hidden the backup keys I mean. I remembered going out on this boat as a child; for our family trips on the ocean. What an embarrassing moment now considering. Leaning over my frame; eyes staring at the grass that touched my ankles. Head moving to stare between my legs in order to catch my panting breaths. I felt weak, I said the words. And I swore I heard John B stop; he paused in disbelief but the writing was pooling down my legs; the droplets of blood obvious. Tilting my head up I bit down on my lower lip to hold in the whine the pain of my wound. “ John B..” Name lingered on my tongue as tried to find the how I’d get this boy to leave without me. Instead he decided to bend down to the ground. I hesitated, I didn’t want to hold him back. “ I..” I started but I also know this boy; he’d risk it all for me. It didn’t make sense for both of us to risk being caught here, but with last minute thinking I pulled myself onto his back. Arms wrapped loosely around his neck. Legs wrapping around his waist, once I was safely on his back I rested my head on his shoulder. “ You can move now..” I echoed in a nearly teasing retort. Keep it light; until we escaped. 

A death trap of my own making.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what happened, I would never leave Sarah behind. I wasn’t stupid. I knew us breaking into her family’s compound tonight to break her out was a death trap. It was a fool’s errand, but I didn’t care. Sarah was in danger. She might not see how deranged her father and brother are, but I knew. I saw first-hand what her psychotic father was capable of, so I wouldn’t put anything past him now. Including him hurting his own daughter just to ensure he kept her far away from me. The man was a damn lunatic and the sooner I got Sarah away from him, the better off she’d be. The driving reason I broke into her room tonight. Well, “prison” was probably a more fitting word given the bars her father had put on her windows, so she could be kept there as his prisoner. Asshole. I thought in disdain as we ran toward some semblance of safety. I stopped though when I realized Sarah was no longer behind me. Panic setting in since it was dark, which made it difficult to see. Following the sounds of her breaths and rustling through the grass as I back-tracked back toward her. Shock and fear washing over me in hearing she had been shot. A part of me wondering if taking her back to her father was the best course of action, since his ties and pull could have a doctor here in moments. Still, something told me she wouldn’t want to go back there. She’d choose to take the risk to keep moving] I’ve got you. Don’t worry. I’d never leave without you, Sarah. [I assuredly whispered out as I helped her get situated safely on my back; ensuring her arms were wrapped tightly around my neck and her legs secured around my waist before I started through the trees and such in search of JJ and the others] “John B? Where the hell are you?” [I heard the familiar sound of JJ’s voice airing out nearby in a hushed tone. Moving in the direction of his voice, I eventually caught up with them. Keeping Sarah securely on my back as we reached them] “Ready for the next part of the plan? The diversion?” [JJ asked with pride in his voice, which prompted a skeptical look from me. All of us knowing JJ wasn’t the best at plans, but I did feel better when Pope and Kie chimed in to share that they had actually helped with this part of the plan] If it gets us out of here, then hell yeah, do it! [I muttered out as I watched JJ throw a lit flare in the direction of the wooded area we had all just escaped from, before throwing two others in separate directions of the same wooded area. Listening and watching as I saw a small explosion go off, followed by another, and then countless more. Pope and Kie explaining they rigged those while they were waiting for us to break Sarah out. Chuckling in pride and feeling a momentary sense of victory as I realized we temporarily stopped Ward’s guards from catching up; prompting us to continue running the remaining way off of the compounds and then into the city. Now it was just a matter of finding a place to hide out and to get Sarah medical attention] Sarah was shot, so we need to get her to a doctor before we do anything else. [I explained to the others; watching the wheels practically turning in their head on how to work this one out without all of us ending up getting caught]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s greatest fear was her friends, was the boy she loved getting hurt on her behalf. She always believed in the good in her father; that he had made mistakes. But when it came to their family he always held their best interest at heart. But all the evidence was staked against him. He faked his own death; he was okay with putting his arms around my neck. He was okay with shooting a bullet not knowing where it land. And Sarah was caught in that crossfire. She was scared that her now slow pace would hurt the pogues in the end. Her new Family. And she knew better than to fight with John B, than to plead with him to keep going without her. He’d never leave her behind. He was noble, he was the man that loved her more than his own life. 

And she’d risk it all for him too. He was the light in her new darkness. Sarah tried to hide it; the trail of blood she now kept behind her. She held the wound to her hip as tightly as she could; until she fell. She fell forward breathing heavily feeling the impact of loss blood. She was trying to move forward in the deep grass; but her feet stopped. She had hoped the male had moved far enough forward to forget; about her. But his voice was like a compass calling her home. And she had to smile to herself as she pulled herself onto his back. Bitting down on her lip knowing she was in pain; that pain in her side, the pool of blood that was now hitting his shirt. Head slowly came to rest on his shoulder; weakness inside of her. “ I know..” She whispered in a weakened tone. She held on for dear life; she had her arms wrapped around his neck, and her legs slid around his waist; a sense of safety; as we neared the spot where the others were. 

The night was dark; no one noticed her pale face; the weaken state she was in. Another phase to the plan? Her eyes trailed over to the smirks of her friends; the explosions that they had in fact thrown in the direction of each guard growing on their tails. A small smirk tugged at her lips. Severs Ward right, to come for family; and you get burned. The others glanced at her; as the elephant in the room was exposed. She was shot; weak; blood pooling out of her as she spoke. “ I’m fine.” She said as she rested her head back down on his shoulder. She vaguely heard JJ make a plan. “ We run into town. There’s abandoned buildings, maybe we find a doctor office on our way.” It wasn’t settle or optimistic in any form; but maybe if we found supplies; I could stitch up my own wound. I had no desire to see a doctor again; nor could we trust any person wouldn’t go running to Ward. So I had barely said a word; leaving the decision up to John B; he was the fighter; the leader in this mess. I’d trust him; I’d follow him anywhere.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I nodded in response to JJ’s suggestion. No offense to my best friend, or anything, but when he came up with plans, they usually crashed and burned. Then again, his idea to break Sarah out wasn’t his worst plan. Mind you, she did get shot as a result of the escape, but I don’t know if I can necessarily blame JJ’s plan for that, or just pin the blame on Ward for being a deranged and psychotic piece of shit] I think heading toward the town is a good idea, but Sarah definitely needs a doctor. Kai, you still have the fake IDs we had made up for all of us, right? [Kai nodded in response while flashing me a confused look] Okay, so if we go to a doctor’s office or hospital, we can use the fake IDs, so Sarah’s identity doesn’t get back to her father. Either way, we need to get the bullet out of Sarah, and get her stitched up. That’s our first priority once we get off of this property. [I explained. Knowing Sarah was getting weaker from the blood loss, so the sooner we got her gunshot wound tended to, the more at ease I would feel that she’s going to be okay. Honestly, at this point in time, my only concern was Sarah. I kept that thought to myself though, because I knew if I startled to unravel with worry, everyone else would begin unraveling too. Bottom line, we weren’t going to make it out of this situation alive if we didn’t remain level headed and make the right decisions]

[ofnotakook]

Right decisions; was it ever in our nature? To be smart, to not lead on impulse? In the short time Sarah spend with John B and the pogues, she’s learned JJ and John B tended to make decisions on a whim. They tended to come up with a plan and without thinking ran with it. Granted it Sarah owed her life to the poges, she owed the idea that she was released from the bars of her own bedroom due to them. And she appreciated the fact given the limbo state the male and myself were tethered into that they risked it all for me. The wrath from my dad; the Camerons’s who I was learning spelled terrible news. Sarah always believed in her dad; the type of man he was. He was kind, he cared about his family wanted to provide for us. But the money the power it gave a person it tended to steamroll you into a horrible person. Sarah couldn’t believe her eyes; the lengths her dad was willing to go, harming his own daughter, embedding Rafe despite his own crimes. She felt disgusted with her own family. The blonde knew where she belonged; where her heart was. Holding onto dear life to the man she currently had her arms wrapped around. 

The blonde let nimble fingers graze over the thin layer of his shirt; the weak grip she held. Her wound was obvious, the blood pooling down her leg. Ward got her damn good. And Sarah hated her fate was on the edge of a line. Doctors wasn’t an option, she knew this island. She knew Ward was probably on a warpath now for blood. Pogues won by letting my escape happen, and now he’d be paying off any source he could, to get his hands on me. 

The female listened despite her own body was fading, head rested upon his head; the comfort of his scent, she was always safe with him. Eyes blinked open and closed, and she slowly let her weaken vision take in the pogue’s who glanced in every direction Smoke of the explosion was all in the air, intoxicating. “ Go South, we get on the boat, and port half way down the island, there’s a hidden office, our best bets is escaping this house.” A thought for food; a hidden doctors office; one that may get me home sailing. 

Without the risk of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised that, in spite of her condition, Sarah was the one to air out the best and most sensible plan. Giving a nod in response as I looked toward JJ and the others] You heard her. Head south. [I said in agreement as I continued carrying Sarah on my back as we all made route south toward the docks. Knowing our risk was still higher than not of getting caught, but she was right… If we had a chance of getting out of here and to freedom, this was the one with the best odds. More than anything though, I just wanted to get her somewhere safe, so she could get some medical attention. I could hear by how weak her voice was that she was losing a lot of blood. The longer this continues, the worse her chances of survival were. Once we reached the docks, we ducked into the shadows until reaching the boat. I made sure to get Sarah on safely, and then I laid her down across one of the seats to rest, while I helped JJ and Pope to untie the ropes; all the while Kai started up the boat. Knowing we’d all need to work together, and to do so quickly, or else we weren’t getting out of here alive] Okay, Kai, we’re clear. Get us the hell out of here. [I called out to her as me and the other guys pushed the boat away from the dock to give it an oomph and then once the boat was cleared from the sides, I returned to Sarah] How bad is it? [I asked as I grabbed the first aid kit stowed under the one seat. Not that I could do much with my incredibly limited experience and knowledge, but I felt helpless by not doing what I could for her now. Besides, if I could at least slow the bleeding, that would give her the best fighting chance to stay alive until we were able to get her medical attention]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt like she had lost everything. She used to be the girl who would always go to the beck and call of her dad; he used to be the incredible man she grew up with. He used to be the man who read bedtime stories to her. He used to give her a glass of milk each time. She had so many fond memories of him. But now; it felt like those memories were tainted. Sarah had always believed in him, she fought the urges to go against him. Seeing his boat explode it destroyed her; she broke up with John B the man she loved for him, because he was glad the man who took his father away got justice. Was dead. And suddenly it felt like our love wasn’t meant to be. 

And now Sarah was bleeding out because of the man who was supposed to protect her. He shot fire at her; at her friends not caring of the consequences. That was the sadness of the reality. That I was alone. I couldn’t turn to my sister, I couldn’t protect. I had to put myself first, and that was the pogues my made family. We lift each other up, we go to bat for each other. And I knew the high stakes. I knew what my father was capable of. I had to wonder how I had any ounce of love for him after what he’s done. Lying to protect Rafe, letting my brother get away with attempting to drown me, he let me get drugged. He’d rather put harm to me than take accountability. And I had to swallow that truth. With a heavy head I felt like my vision was becoming blur as I spurred the last task at hand. Hands loosen on the grip against John B’s shirt, as my eyes drifted shut. How long had we walked? Before I heard the rustling of feet hitting the docks. And I felt my body being dropped gently into the boat, back pressed against a hard backing on the edge. Slowly eyes lifted seeing blurs. 

Figures moving left and right; the “ Ropes done.” I heard from JJ as both boys plopped themselves down on the boat. Pope was at the wheel with Kie, I heard the soft whispers of nothingness. And I heard his voice, the one that always dragged me home. And I wanted to be honest, as my hand slowly nimbly moved against the dam fabric of my sweater as I lifted it up. And I saw it the blood, it was dark, and it explained why I felt faint. Turning my eyes to the man I loved; John B was preparing to bandage up the wound for a short time. “ It doesn’t look pretty, I’ll have a nasty scar if anything.” I aired out attempting to lighten the mood as I felt the boat move as if it was full of lighten. 

This remembered me of when I saved his ass, when we first started out; on our little adventure. A shy grin turned against my lips as I spoke. “ Last time one of us had to bandage the other up, I was sneaking you into the house, I saved your ass, are we finally repaying the favor?” I asked with a sense of teasing in my voice. Definitely not the time, but I needed a laugh a small brief moment for just us.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Although I knew now wasn’t the time for jokes and quips, I still appreciated the fact that Sarah was trying to keep the mood light between us. Maybe if the circumstances had been reversed, I would have been all for cracking jokes… Hell, I would more than likely be cracking them too. Given that Sarah had been shot and was rapidly losing blood though, I definitely wasn’t in a fun and games kind of mindset. For her sake though, I did flash her a grin as I leaned down to press a tender kiss to her forehead] Well, I figured I owed you so it was high time I stepped up and returned the favor. Maybe next time you want me to save you though, let’s go with something that involves less blood shed and need for panic… Deal? [Giving it my best effort to joke in return. In the meantime I grabbed the first aid kit. My hand shaking slightly as I quickly fished around for some bandaging and things I thought I could use to stop the bleeding] Either way, I’m putting you in charge of keeping an eye on me to make sure I’m doing this right. I mean, doctor stuff is new territory for me so I’ll need the supervision. All that to say, eyes open at all times, okay? [My casual way of requesting to Sarah that I wanted her to keep her eyes open. Afraid that if she closed them and fell asleep, I might lose her. A thought that I couldn’t bear to consider as I started to do what I could to apply pressure to her wound and then applied some gauze and then bandaging too, all in an effort to stop the significant bleeding she was currently experiencing]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was well aware of the bleeding that now wasn’t the time for her humor, for her need to crack a joke open. But Sarah could see how scared he was; it was in his eyes. She was scared herself that she was about to take her last breath, by the hands of her own father. Ward had no idea she was assuming that he had aimed for her; she had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. Her own father pulled the trigger; he was aiming a weapon at her friends, at the man she loved. And now she was facing deaths door; she remembered the last time. 

John B was the one aching in pain as she ran her fingers with a cold rag over his blooded wound; which is why the dirty blonde showed amusement. Or she was going nuts with the lack of blood in her system. Eyes had slowed movement as he spoke; and she knew this was his way of saying “ Stop Sarah.” As if she planned on taking a bullet tonight. But her smile soften knowing feeling the panic under his tone, and her slimmed hand; her hand reached to touch his arm as a soothing of reassurance that she was okay. “ I promise next time, I’ll tell my dad not to shoot.” She echoed with that sarcastic retort of hers. But Sarah was done with the jokes. Not that she had the energy. She felt like her body was giving out; she felt the color had now drained from her face in the dark. She barely felt the boat moving against the water; the ocean seas; the seas that used to bring soothing. That used to make her feel safe; and now she was trembling, she felt his hand on her wound; and she had glanced down the blood was soaking her skin, right through his hand. “ Use the guse to wipe around the wound, and then bandage it gently at least until we arrive.” To a doctor; assuming we had the money to get me treated; or this was the end. Her eyes landed back on his features, and she uttered an “ I love you.” As if it was the last words she’d say. 

Eyes kept fluttering open and shut in a daze, despite the promise to stay with him, to guide him through the process; she hardly felt her hand move down to her side; as if her limbs were jelly now. If only this boat would move any faster..

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I appreciated Sarah’s attempt to crack jokes now. That was kinda our thing, you could say, but at the moment, I felt far from laughing. I was worried and growing even more so with every passing second. Sarah was shot. She was bleeding out currently, and I had no way of knowing if we’d get her medical attention in time to save her] Speed up the boat! Let’s go! [I yelled out to Pope and Kie as I saw Sarah’s eyes close. Judging by the worried look on JJ’s face, I knew he was thinking the same thing I was] Hurry the hell up, JJ, and help me pack her wound. Quick, get those gauze pads from the bag! [My voice shaking in building worry as JJ did as I ordered; grabbing me what I needed as I tossed the now soiled and blood soaked gauze pads to the side as I took the clean ones from JJ’s grasp. My hand shaking as I pressed it against Sarah’s gunshot wound. After what felt like a damn eternity, the boat pulled to a stop. I didn’t exactly know where we were at the moment, but at this point Pope and Kie were tying off the boat to the pier, so it wouldn’t go anywhere, and then they rushed toward us] “Come on. I got word that there’s a surgeon in town who handles cases like this for the right price.” [Pope explained which prompted my brows to furrow in confusion] “Get Sarah, let’s go.” [Kie instructed, which prompted me to tape off the currently gauzed padding I had in place, then JJ helped me to lift Sarah carefully out of the boat and onto the pier. Once JJ and I were on the pier, I cradled Sarah securely in my arms] “Here, take this bag. It should be enough to get her treated. Pope and I will stay with the boat.” [Kie said as JJ grabbed the bag and the address of the warehouse doctor, and then we rushed through the dark night air toward the provided address. A less than ideal situation from all angles given Sarah’s condition and the fact that we were in an unfamiliar place looking for the location of a doctor that we knew nothing about. Talk about a wild card move, at its best] Stay with me, Sarah. We’re going to get you help. Keep fighting. [I called out to her as JJ barked out instructions and I merely kept up with his pace as I carried Sarah in my arms toward our destination]

[ofnotakook]

A scar that might kill me. 

It was a thought for Sarah; she felt like she’d been through the ringer. Her own family was willing to sacrifice her for their own benefits. Sarah once thought the world of her father; of the family. But now she knew the truth they only craved the wealth they’d stomp on anyone who dared to stand in their way. Sarah’s own brother tried to drown her, and now her father was the one who pulled the trigger. Obviously he was aiming for John B, but Sarah knew she’d always end up in the cross fire. 

Not that she cared, she’d rather die than live without him. The words she said that night; on the smaller boat, as John B fought for his life, to escape the death sentence. And I meant it; I loved John B and yeah we fought; we ended up screaming at each other. But i’d do anything to be with him, and now as I was fighting for my own life; I only hoped the pogues survived. Sarah was falling unconscious, she had felt her body shutting off. The last words she spoke were of love, an undenying world of love for him. But she felt the blood lost. She felt her wounds becoming fetel. And she heard the urgent, the eagerness in her man’s voice as she felt the vague packing of her wound. How long had it been? 

She had no idea, because she felt darkness overcome her. She felt like she was falling into limo. She barely felt John B and JJ as they wrapped her sim arms around their shoulders and held her up. Enough to look like Sarah was walking, but she was dragged towards the clinic, and she barely heard the exchange when the surgeon called the three up. And with each step, she felt a slight ache in her body. An ache she wanted to subside. But Sarach knew she had to fight; to live, to open her eyes again. She felt her frame fall to a bedding; as her head hung down as the surgeon whispered. “ It’ll be okay, fight.” And She fel the breathing tube come to her nose, she felt the bleeding that was exposed. The doctor mumbled a few words to her friends. “ Do you have the money? She may not live.” He uttered and I felt my body weak. My own shadow breathing as my eyes slowly woke, for a second to see the unfamiliar surroundings, the walls brown. The tubes connected to me, I was scared. But I couldn’t move before my eyes went shut all over again. 

The doctor took the money and he soon took a tool; to save me, if it did any good, because right now I felt like I was on the brink of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

“Yeah, man. Here.” [JJ aired out in response to the shifty doctor’s request for money, before handing him a bag with money in it. My eyes shifted into a roll watching the doctor count it. So much for a moral code to save a life. Apparently all this asshole cared about what money] Just save her. Please. [I aired out pleadingly as I held Sarah’s hand with my one hand; all the while gently stroking back the hair from her face with my free hand. After a moment or so the doctor seemed satisfied with the amount of money JJ gave him inside that bag, and then he began. Watching as he first put Sarah under with what I assumed to be some kind of anesthesia before he grabbed a questionable looking scalpel so he could begin making the first cut. I knew in my gut that trusting this doctor might be the worst idea we’ve ever had, but at the same point, our hands were tied. It was either this option or we’d lose Sarah. Sure, his “she may not live” statement didn’t leave me with much confidence in his skills, but I had to believe in Sarah now. Sarah was strong. She was brave. If anyone could fight this, it was her] Come on, baby. Fight this. Don’t you dare leave me. Fight, baby. Fight. [I gently pleaded in her ear before pressing a tender kiss to her forehead] “Keep watch.” [I heard the doctor instruct of JJ before giving me a knowing sort of look and then a nod] “Here we go.” [The doctor said in less than a confident tone as he made the first cut; taking the scalpel across Sarah’s skin in order to remove the bullet from her body. It was excruciating to watch, but I promised myself that no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her side] “Grab those gauze pads and some gloves. Pour some of that vial with sanitizing solution directly over the incision spot and then place the gauze pads firmly across the area to slow her bleeding. We don’t want her losing more blood than she already has.” [The doctor instructed; forcing me to release Sarah’s hand, so I could assist in the surgery. After what felt like an eternity, he finished; managing to remove the bullet and then to seemingly successfully repair damage to her wounded organ internally. Once he finished, he stitched her up then covered the wound with a significant amount of gauze pads and medical tape] “It’s a wait and see, at this point, so let’s hope she’s a fighter.” [The doctor said while washing his hands in the sink in the corner of the room] She is. [I flatly said in response before removing my gloves and washing my own hands once the doctor had finished. After ensuring my hands were clean, I returned to the table where Sarah rested and I took her hand in my own] You’re a fighter, Sarah. The strongest person I know, so fight this. I’m not going anywhere. [I had no way of knowing if she could hear me, but I didn’t care. On the off chance that she could, I was going to remind her of her strength and ability to fight this now]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt the screams into darkness. She felt like she was on a cloud in limo. She had no control of her body; she felt like she was paralyzed. She didn’t have the power to move, she barely felt her body being held up. She didn’t want to die, she didn’t want to be traped in her own bedroom. She never asked her own father to shoot bullets at her and her friends. Sarah suddenly felt like her once simply life was a cycle of nightmares. Death on our door steps, the rush of running; being on the med. Sarah knew her getting shot was her fault. If she had just listened to John B weeks ago; that Ward didn’t have my best interest at heart. 

If I had stayed with Pogues instead of trusting my now psychic family. One trying to kill me left and right. Sarah had learned her lesson, the only people she could count on was herself, the pogues, even her sister she just hoped her sister was okay. She knew she was stipid to be thinking about anyone but herself now. But she held sympathy for others. The aching in her body was enough to force her to scream in pain if she wasn’t knocked out. She vaguely heard the way her body gently was placed down on a mental table.  I vaguely felt John B his breath in my ear as he tried to reassure me I was okay, I was a fighter. I was in my own little bubble. The darkness in my lids, the way my body was lifeless, especially as the doctor did insert his tool into my body, if I was awake I’d be screaming. I barely felt it; probably from the anesthesia. I couldn’t move, I had no idea how long I was out. I could vaguely hear the voices as the doctor echoed out it would be touch and go. Would I be surviving? Was I still bleeding out? Sarah felt the stirs in her mind as she laid still. Baby, fight.. Words echoed in my ears. 

John B, he needed me, he needed me to be strong, to fight through the blood lost. I couldn’t let him down. I was groggy when I suddenly felt the strength to open my eyes. The small light above me it flashed my eyes forcing me to squit, and I felt John B’s head on my stomach, not on the wounded skin, but right under. I was aching as I let out a soft wine. My hand pale as I lowered my hand onto his dirty brown locks, fingers slowly combed through his hair. “ John B.” I echoed in a whisper; I couldn’t speak and I noticed JJ was sitting in the chair, eyes closed, even JJ stayed. A made family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Hours passed by and there was no change. Sarah was so still and I had no way of knowing if she’d ever wake up. The doctor didn’t sound hopeful. Made a snide remark about her chances of pulled through as he greedily took our money and then ran like hell like some kind of coward. Clearly it was all about money for him. As more time passed, I found my head resting against Sarah’s side. Near her incision but not close enough to cause any further damage. I just wanted and needed to be close to her now. JJ wasn’t far away. He took a look out to make sure Ward nor any of his men were nearby before he’d return to the private room here and take a seat in the chair adjacent from where Sarah and I rested now. I didn’t know how much more time had passed… Felt like an eternity even though I knew it was probably just a few more hours, but eventually I heard the faint sound of her voice, as well as felt her fingers rustle gingerly through my hair. At that my head immediately shot up and I looked at her. Relief flooding my face and expression currently] You’re awake! Thank God! [I uttered out in evident relief as I pressed a gentle kiss to the back of her hand] How are you feeling? The black market doctor left a few things for pain if you need it. [The guy wasn’t exactly reliable but he did seem to save Sarah’s life, so at the moment, I was thinking a bit more favorably of him. Maybe he wasn’t a total money-hungry quack after all. Jury was still out on that one though] Do you want some water? [I asked as I had already picked up a fresh bottle of water; prepared to give her some if she was thirsty]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt weak, she ha no idea as to how long she’d been laying her. The memory of her father; of how easily he had aimed a gun at her, at her friends because of what? Jealousy? Because he wanted to hold this wild control over her? Sarah had once desired to please her family. She had once idolize her father the memory of us at the docks when I was only a little girl it clouded who I knew he was. 

But a few hours before he was so willing to throw me under the bus. He was so willing to let me bleed out on our yard. Because of his hate for the Pogues. I was hurt, I was feeling betrayed but at the same time, relieved as I felt my body come to life. I felt my eyes lift open as I adjusted to the dim light. I saw JJ in the corner as my eyes peeled over to John B who had his head rested against my palm. And I knew I was lucky, he was here. He loved me, and I had to let my fingers run soothingly through his dirty blonde locks. A small smile peeled at my lips. And I knew I couldn’t move. I felt numb to my core as my body was now healing from the blood lost, Sarah wasn’t going to jump up, the fear of Ward on our tail was aching against my own skin. The blonde had peered up at him; the man she loved so much. 

“ I’m okay.” As okay as I was going to be. The wound had been deep, the stitched up wound was felt as my eyes slowly moved to the man I loved. My hand moved to reach for John B. And I felt a sigh of relief escape my own lips. And I felt my gaze linger on him. “ I’m sorry, I’m sorry my dad is a crazy,” My words could never compare to the pain my family has caused him, the pogues and I wanted to do my part to mend those fences. “ Yes.” I echoed to the option of water my throat felt dry but I wasn’t going to jump forward, I slowly lifted my head up to get to a sitting position. My free hand had moved to my side, knowing the pain; the wound my own family caused.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I felt mounds of relief when I heard Sarah’s voice. She was alive. She was awake, and she was speaking. Lifting her hand to my lips as I pressed a couple of kisses to the back of her hand, then gently lowered her hand back down onto the metal table she was lying on] Hey, don’t apologize. It’s not your fault. All that matters is keeping you safe and away from your deranged family. [No matter what, I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t let Ward harm Sarah again. I thought to myself as I brought a fresh bottle of water to Sarah’s lips, so she could drink as much as she wanted and needed. I knew she needed time to rest and heal, but the sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better I could guarantee her safety from her family. One could hope, at least. I mean the way Ward operated, and the fact that he knew people all over the world, I wasn’t sure exactly how far remote we would need to go, and for how long either for that matter, in order to keep Sarah safe, but no matter what, I’d do what it takes. I came close to losing Sarah this time… Too close for comfort, so I wasn’t willing to take any chances with her safety again. At least not until Ward was no longer a threat to her] Once you’re well enough, we’re going to get you out of here. Pope and Kie are keeping an eye on the boat, and when you’re strong enough, we’re all getting on that boat, and getting as far away as possible. We figure with some distance and preferably some place off the grid, eventually your father will stop looking for you. [Maybe wishful thinking since Ward wasn’t one who took well to losing, but one could hope he’d eventually give up and accept that Sarah was gone]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah kept asking herself the obvious how she’d been blind. How she was capable of still holding a torch of love for her family. With all the crimes all the ways her own brother tried to murder her; sending drug mules her way, being the one that nearly drowned her to death. And now her own father; was so mad at the Pogues so terrified of losing his daughter to the pogues; not wanting to lose the fight that he aimed and shot me. The blood that once covered her fingertips, the blood the redness that ran over her sweater, it was an image Sarah couldn’t erase.  

Her friends, her boyfriend? Cut into the crossfires because of her fucked up  family. And even now as she opened her eyes; said a few words, she felt the aching on her wound, damn that stitch is gonna hurt like hell. But it was comforting to feel his touch, to witness his lips touching her knuckles once again. John B, he was her anchor that kept her whole. A soften expression; a smile curled at the corners of her lips as she saviored his touch; his lips against her skin. “  They drugged me, they forced me here. I feel trapped like no one is safe in that house, but my sister..”  A fear for the little Cameron it rocked me whole now, as I felt the lump forming in my throat. Wheezie she was innocent had no idea who’s roof she was living under. Like myself; I’d been blinded from the truth. But now my father was deranged; he passed off onto Rafe; and Rose was clueless as ever a pond in the game; until she crossed Ward. 

A slight cough was heard; as the blonde felt the wetness hit her tongue, one sip of water turned into half the bottle until she released the top from her lips and she slowly sat herself up, her palms hitting the metal of the table to hold herself up. Nuts insane considering her own wounds she wore. But her eyes ran along John B’s features with ease. “ You know he won’t let that happen. He blames you the pogues for his princess no longer being in his care. I’m a game for him to win..” A sad truth, an ached formed in her chest now.  “ I wouldn’t blame you if you allowed the pogues to leave me here for  dust to get away. I don’t want to bring you down, or put you and pogues in danger..” Not again the words hid  at the tips of her tongue. 

Danger; our names, but Ward he’d kill to end the war..I was terrified the lengths he’d go no matter how safe I felt with John B; he’d get hurt because of me. A pill I needed to swallow now.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, that would never happen. [I flatly replied with a matter of fact sort of shrug. Sure, I knew if this was just about Sarah, maybe JJ and the others would have high-tailed it out of here. Not necessarily Pope since he had a heart to do the right thing, but Kie was what you could say, hot and cold toward Sarah, so it wouldn’t take much for her to bail on Sarah. And well, JJ hated Kooks in general, so he had no loyalties to Sarah either. Thing was though, they all knew I’d literally die to protect Sarah, and the Pogues would always put their lives on the line to protect each other. All that to say, as long as I was staying put at Sarah’s side, the Pogues wouldn’t be going anywhere either because they’d always have my back, just like I’d always have theirs too. We fought fiercely for each other] Even if the others decided to high-tail it out of here, I’d never leave your side. Unless you tell me to go, I’m not going anywhere… [I started to say before an amused smirk followed] And even then, I can’t promise I’d actually leave. You know I’m stubborn when people try to tell me what to do. [I teased even though that was the truth] Either way, once you’re well enough, we’re all getting the hell out of here, and getting to safety together. Until then, just rest and heal. [I said as I gave her hand another gentle squeeze. My way of reassuring her that we were all in this together; no matter what the outcome]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah knew her choices  as of late not only disappointed herself but those around her. Sarah never wanted the wealth, she never wanted to be accepted as the princess Kook. That title had been given to her. People made assumptions about her; her personality; how she followed the kook business, and yes once upon a time she was a kook. Bu from that one day running around with John B at chapel Hill, helping him seek answers to a quest she had no idea how over our heads we were. We were just kids running around aimlessly. But I saw that treasure hunting look in his eyes; the way his eyes lit up at a map, and I mused, I admired who John B. And he made me want more for myself. 

One day; one rain kiss on the docks was all it took for the dirty blonde to feel hooked. He’s who she loved, and even with death upon us; my dad probably having a search squad on our heads. I had let the pogues down; when I had let John B go, I was angry, I was sad when I thought my dad died, and john B was just so glad to see him fall through the cracks. My dad was money hungry, he was awful he killed, he allowed Rafe to get away with Murder, but he was my dad; but now as I groggily came out of my unconscious state; I remembered the cage I felt locked in. I recalled his aim, the gun shot wound that should’ve killed me. My own father aimed the trigger, and right now Sarah knew in her gut she was a pogue, and she appreciated the friendships she made. Eyes glanced over for comfort to the boy that made her heart race. And her pinky found his; a trace of her finger against his own. 

“ I made that mistake once, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for letting you go John B, I was..” Pausing briefly before a sigh could be heard escaping her lips. “ I was hurting, I didn’t want to believe my dad was this monster. I know you said you’ve always got me, but I wouldn’t blame you if you decided no one chances.” Chances to love me, to be together after this horror war my dad had, all the times guns aimed at us because of him, a war he wanted to win on behalf of me. One he already lost. 

Because my heart; who I was, it was a pogue; my known family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I get it, Sarah. Before I came into your life and opened your eyes to who your dad and brother really are, you had a really tight bond with your dad. Naturally you’d want to fight to protect his reputation. It only makes sense that you wouldn’t want to believe your dad was capable of something like that. If the situation was reversed, and it was me in your shoes, I probably would have done the same thing as you. [I admitted honestly. It was the truth. If this was my dad, I would have fought to protect his reputation too. It’s what you do for the people you love. I’d do it for Sarah and the pogues too because I consider them my family. No matter what, I’d always have their backs, just like I know the pogues would have mine] You’ll never run out of chances with me, Sarah. I hate to break it to you, but I love you, so until you say otherwise, you’re stuck with me. [As much truth as there was in my words, I aired out that honesty with a joking tone] Anyway, for now, we just need to get your strong enough that we can move somewhere safer for the duration of your recovery. [I knew where we were would suffice for now, but it would only be a matter of time before Sarah’s dad figures out we’re hiding out here currently. We’d cross that bridge if and when the time comes. For now I wanted Sarah to get a little stronger and heal up a bit before we decide to move her]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah had always been privileged growing up. She knew of the different layers of the island. She never wanted to believe in herself to judge others; the living, how some had to work harder than others. But Sarah was guilty to pulling away when it felt messy and difficult. When someone got too close to her; she was the one guilty of running. The fear of being seen truly. It’s what happened with her friendship with Kie, and it was easy to blame the split on how John B reacted to her father’s then death. But the truth was Sarah was scared. 

Scared of letting go of the shielded life she lived, the ground beneath her gone. Her family shattered into pieces. Her dad wasn’t the man she once admired. He was a monster; he felt threatened he knew I wasn’t under the spell, and he tried to hurt me. My own brother tried to kill me, did I feel safe with my family? No I was shot because of my dad, and now I felt the numbness against my skin. The numbness that tingled the layer of my stomach; where the scars stood. I wouldn’t blame John B if he wanted to cut loses here, and leave me stranded. But I knew him his heart; the good boy inside of him; the boy I loved with every fiber inside of me. “ It’s not about him anymore. I knew who he was; he wasn’t the dad I once laughed with on the beach when I was a little girl, he knew he lied, he knew what he did, and my brother is protecting him. I’m sorry for the pain my family caused you.” The pogues hanging onto my lips. 

Hearing the words; unlimited chances hung in the air. I love you; and I loved him, I wouldn’t let the male get away from me again. Sarah tried her best to master the pain, the smile heated against brims as her hand grasped hold of his fingers. “ I love you.” words spoken as the blonde attempted to sit up using the strength of her elbows to hold her upper frame upright. But she knew staying put wasn’t an option; Ward had his minions surroundings areas; I would gasp through the pain than get caught. An intense stare hinted into my features as I spoke. “ John B.. we have to move. I can handle the pain. This island isn’t safe not with my dad, he has people..” And I knew Ward; he wanted power; to hold an angle, and us staying still didn’t feel safe; for me or the pogues.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I knew Sara was right... We had to move sooner rather than later. We were basically sitting ducks here. Ward had this whole island in his pocket, so it would only be a matter of time before he got wind of the fact that we were here. I'll be damned if I did all this work to break Sara out of there... And then to get her the help she needed after she got shot, just for that deranged idiot to take her back to the prison he had her encamped in] Okay, if you're sure you can handle it, we'll move. [Worried if she busts a stitch she may bleed out though] We need to take it slow though. Be smart about this. We can't afford you busting any stitches. If you bleed out... [I trailed off. Not even able to finish off the thought of that possibility] Let me tell JJ we're going to move. [I said as I pressed a kiss to Sara's forehead; letting my lips linger there for a second or two before I broke away. It was almost like I didn't want to let her out of my sight; fearful I'd lose her] Be right back. [I promised as I briefly and reluctantly left the table she was resting on in order to find JJ, who was keeping watch just outside] We're moving. We need to get off of this island. Alert the others. [JJ agreed; immediately pulling out his phone to message the others to get the boat ready for our momentary departure. In seeing JJ got the ball rolling on that, I returned to Sara. Preparing to move her once she gave me the okay. I still felt unsettled about us leaving, but at least night had set in, so that would give us the advantage as we used the darkness, shadows, and any alleyways we could find to our advantage] Just tell me when, and I'll help you off the table.

[ofnotakook]

I can always trust in you

@apogueforlife 

I can always trust in you 

Trust; it had to be earned. Love; it had to be developed. For Sarah she always had her guard up. Each time she’d get close to letting someone in the other shoe would drop, she’d freeze up, and run in the other direction. With each boyfriend she ever had she had the urge to run. To distant herself when she felt like she was trapped. When she felt the pressure to feel more than what she did. Topper he liked the idea of her. He loved the idea of being with her; but he wasn’t in love with her. 

There’s only one boy Sarah loved; and that was John B. It happened unexpectedly. It happened on a day she never saw coming. That day stayed with her. The day we went to chapel hill; the day we had fun dressing each other up. The day we pretended to be our alter egos; Val and Vlad. It was nice to be herself. I didn’t feel the pressure to be perfect. I didn’t feel like my family was watching me, I was myself. I felt safe, I felt like John B saw me despite all the flaws I had. He loved me for me, and I loved him. It was a roller coaster of a relationship if you asked me. We had gone from barely knowing each other; to falling completely utterly in love. I gave up my kook card for him. I knew the obsluces we’d be facing now, the pogue’s vs the kook. But nothing made me question my loyalty to him. To the Pogues. It got messy with my dad; him being the reason Big John was gone. The reason why the gold was taken. The reason I was on the run with John B. The gold felt so close yet so far. We managed to clear John B’s name but that’s because Ward decided in his best interest to fake his own death and act like the hero. The guy that claimed to have been a killer in order to protect his own son. Rafe just the thought of being near him made me sick to my stomach. For a second I was upset, I felt like my whole body ached when I witnessed the boat blow up. When I witnessed my father shatter beyond the sea. And that’s when I saw the truth; what led to us being torn apart; what led to John B and I no longer being together. He had been happy to ward dead; and I couldn’t exactly find the words to blame him. He took everything from him. But at the end of the day; he was my dad. I was hurting and I remembered that look all too well; the look of proudnessI felt like I was seeing another person. I was grieving the dad I once looked up to, to the dad that I was once his princess. I needed John B to hold me, to make me feel like it was always going to be okay. But it suddenly felt like us it wasn’t meant to be.. 

Walking away for yourself; was all you could do. It was hard to be near him; to be pulled back into the adventure; to the cross. But for Pope I’d be there; awkwardness assured. Sarah didn’t know if she should make eye contact with him; or just stay silent. Silence seemed better; until that night; we had a plan to get the cross from Rafe; the big truck was parked outside my house. JJ and Pope were hidden behind the bushes. I was determined to walk inside; to get the key to unlock the truck; how we’d get the heavy cross out was a big ass story of it’s own. But I had made two steps to the gates, one glance backwards; I saw him John B was about to get up; and for a second I found myself hopeful; maybe this was the moment of the unknown. What comes next? Dark hues met for a second and I swore the air was taken out of my lungs; but he didn’t budge, didn’t move. Giving me the indication we had nothing left to say. That was the last memory I had of him; of us staring at each other. 

Head leaned against the gated up windows of my room at the barbados house, The house I was locked into. The boat felt like a nightmare; I was drugged by my own family. Rose had put a drug in my tea. Rafe and had helped her execute the plan; to force me here against my will. I remembered telling Ward when he claimed John B only cared about the treasure about the gold that I was just stuck in the cross hair that he was wrong. That John b would find him and come for him once I went missing. How wrong had I been? I wanted to blink back the tears that dared to fall. I was a pogue at heart; I chose it for John B because I loved him, despite our differences he’d always have a permanent place in my heart. It had been weeks since we left on the boat, I had tried to zone out the conversations of my parents; I had pretended to be sleeping at times, but here once I had been pulled into my room I never left. I guess Ward was afraid I’d run, or threaten to tell the cops his own daughter was kidnapped against her will. Give or take. Sarah swallowed the lump in her throat; it had gotten dark. She smelt the tray of food that her sister left her outside the door. Her bed was an inch away; The light pink covers still in place, it had been a day or two since we arrived, and I had slept in my bed because that meant i was okay, that meant that I was adjusting to being here; in this house. When all I wanted was to break free. At the window, on the seat where my back was pressed against the wall. Head tilted towards the window, I could see the water; any boats that passed by. I was alone; and all I could hope was that the Pogue’s were okay that perhaps my dad was right they managed to get the cross and that’s all that mattered for Pope. Eyes moved to the stars; for a moment it was nice to believe we were looking at the same stars; as if John B was on his way; assuming my dad was lying. For now all I could do was hold hope; I’d find a way out; it was a done deal. 

Tomorrow; I’d work out a plan. The Pogues would have me, if I found him. We’d always have each other. A wistful thought as a hint of a smile tainted onto my lips.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Love. Definitely not something I ever believe really existed. I always saw it more as, in life, people come and go. The ones who matter will stick with you, through thick and thin. For me, that was the Pogues: JJ, Kie, and Pope. I don’t remember a time in my life when those three weren’t part of it, and something tells me, I’ll never shake them either. Not that I’d want to, cause they’re everything to me. Then Sarah Cameron busted into my life unexpectedly… One of those surprising moments where I got myself in a sticky situation, and Sarah Cameron, of all people, was the one who bailed me out of it. Even more surprising though was how I felt when I was with her. It was the first time in my life when I found myself wanting to be with a girl exclusively. In time she even made me rethink my original theory about love. Then, well, I guess you could say life happened, and we broke up. Sure, I knew I played a part in our break up. When her father died, I should have been more supportive of the toll that loss would take on Sarah. Yeah, the guy was bad news… A lying crook, which Sarah obviously knew too, but he was still her father. Given the bad blood I had with Ward, and also the fact that he murdered my father, could you really blame me for being relieved that the guy was finally gone? Right or wrong, it’s how I felt. This leading to the end of Sarah’s and my relationship. Still, in my heart I knew this wasn’t the end for us. A love like ours always finds a way back to one another. Naïve or not, I refused to see it any other way…

Then weeks passed and I was starting to wonder if it really had been the end for us. Mind you, I still wasn’t giving up, but instead of dwelling on what may or may not happen between me and Sarah, instead the Pogues and I focused on getting the cross back for Pope. It actually became a, “Kill two birds with one stone” type of adventure for us though, since word got to me that Sarah had been abducted by her family. Them ultimately boarding a ship with Sarah and the cross, allegedly heading to Barbados; knowing that was exactly where we would be going to. This was it… This was our chance to, not only help Pope get the cross back, but also for me to rescue Sarah too…

Given that us Pogues had made some enemies, and also the fact that we didn’t have so much as a pot to piss in, much less money to travel to Barbados, it took some work, a lot of time, and even more creativity on our parts before we finally reached Barbados. Once we did, I knew we needed to devise a plan to get back both Sarah and the cross. Of course JJ, as usual, came up with one of the worst plans I had ever heard. This saying a lot considering JJ’s had some really shitty plans, over the years. This one pretty much topped the other bad plans he’s had though; prompting all of us to shoot down his plan and come up with another one. Knowing it was either come up with a better plan, or go with JJ’s plan which will likely either get us all killed, or at the very least, we’ll end up locked up in some jail cell. In time we did come up with a new plan. Not a great one, but definitely better than JJ’s plan, so it was something, at least. For our part we decided one step at a time…

We’d wait till night, rescue Sarah first, and then once we had her safely out of that house and away from her deranged family, we’d devise a plan to get the cross back. I mean, it’s not like we could just knock on the front door, and request either. Not without being shot, that is. We couldn’t even break in and steal the cross without getting caught, since it was so damn heavy, it was going to take a hell of a lot of brute strength to carry it, so we’d just deal with that plan later. For now, my focus was on Sarah. Sure, I knew there was a chance I’d be the last person she’d want to see tonight, but given me and the Pogue’s rescuing her, or her remaining a hostage with her own family, I figured I was the lesser of the evils, so to speak. I justified as Kie and Pope remained look outs from the ground; keeping hidden to the garden area where they tried to remain unseen, while JJ and I went to the roof. With JJ’s help, he hoisted me down onto the balcony I had scoped out and learned led to the bedroom they were keeping Sarah locked in. Once I approached the balcony window, I peaked inside discreetly; making sure her family was nowhere in sight before I gave a couple of light taps on the window. My way of alerting Sarah that I was here. Of course the window was pad-locked, which just pissed me off more. How could they do this to Sarah? The Cameron’s definition of family was nothing more than a load of bullshit, if you ask me, because this isn’t how you treat family. I thought in building anger as I used the pin I had with me to trigger the lock. Once I heard it click, my eyes shifted up toward JJ. The thumbs up he gave me in reply assuring me he had cut the security system like he confidently told me he could easily handle. This was JJ, so although I’d trust him with my life, and well, I had a few times, I still held my breath as I slowly and gingerly opened the window; expelling a quiet sigh of relief when an alarm didn’t sound as I opened the window] Val…? [I quietly whispered her code name into the dark bedroom. Hoping it would soften any resentment she might have in seeing me here now] Vlad and the crew are here to spring you from here… [I further whispered into the dark bedroom as I waited for her to come over to the window; knowing we didn’t have long before someone would alert the Cameron’s that the security system had been hacked into, so the sooner we got out of there, the better our chances of getting out of here alive]

[ofnotakook]

The pogue plans never went according to plan. Not that Sarah was going to complain now considering. She was able to escape the bars that locked her into her old bedroom. She was tired of starving herself out of spite. She was tired of laying awake at night in fear that she might be dragged out of bed. She was tired of being forced to live the perfect life. Forced to smile for her parents; the only one in her family she liked was her sister Wheezie, she’s who I wanted to protect. But she had young opinions, didn’t see what our family was capable of. And given how much risk John B went through to find me, I had to go with him. Not that I wanted to stay trapped or that I’d risk his life to save my sister. 

I felt torn with myself now. I escaped; I was on the roof; I had survived the lies, I had survived my own father aiming a gun at me; of course to his unknown knowledge Ward did exceed in his aiming and catching fire on one of us. I doubted his attention was to hurt me. Yet again it felt like a toss up considering, he did try to strangle me to death; and drugged me to get onto that stupid boat. But I knew him to know the problem wasn’t my stubbornness, it was John B and the pogues. He was threatened, and right now the Camerons wasn’t my family; it was the pogues. I had chose them a long time ago weather I wanted to admit it or not. 

Safe; is what I felt; despite the pain that was pooling on my side; the white sweater was making it difficult to hide. But I felt his kiss; the graze of his lips on my head, a tenderness of who we were. A love language for us. Seeing as JJ had followed my lead; and started down the ladder; I had stepped forward turning my back to where my hues fell on the male I loved with all my heart. Despite our differences that did come to light when I uttered the words maybe we weren’t meant to be, to work out. 

A soulfulness in my stare as I uttered my words. “ Promise you’ll come down.” I mouthed the words “ I can’t lose you.” As my palm wasn’t already filled with my own blood. Taking my hand from side, I placed them firmly on the handles of the ladder, with one step and than the next. I caught sight of the droplets of blood hitting the ladder as I climbed down, It wasn’t until I reached the bottom, I felt JJ; place his hand on my hip in order to help me off when he wore this stunned expression. “ Sarah.” He mouthed, I knew he felt it; the blood that now covered his hand; I shook my head. “ Don’t say a word.” I had strength I’d be okay until I couldn’t walk anymore; He was about to say something when I hit him in the chest. 

John B would be in earshot; I couldn’t tell him yet; once we were in the clear I’d tell him, but I didn’t want him to worry about me, not after all the risks he took to save me. Pushing myself to the side, I eyed the small area where our feet hit the grass; Kie and Pope had to make it to the gates; where it led to the waterfront it was our get away. Our only glimmer of hope.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I promise. I’ll be right behind you. [I assured Sarah as I watched JJ go down the ladder first, to ensure it was safe for Sarah to follow. Once JJ gave the “all clear” signal, I gave Sarah and nod to begin descending the ladder] You’ll be okay. JJ will meet you at the bottom, and I won’t be far behind. [I reminded her as she started to descend the ladder. I ducked down lower to the roof as I heard the sound of more gunshots looming in the air. Once Sarah was about halfway down the ladder, I started to position myself onto the ladder; getting a good grip on the sides before I slowly began descending the ladder too. It wasn’t long before I could faintly hear Sarah and JJ safely at the bottom on the ground below the ladder, and I was following them moments later. After I reached the bottom, I noticed the concerned look JJ was giving me, but assuming it had something to do with the fact that we were all still in danger on the Cameron’s grounds, I didn’t question JJ on his strange look. Instead, I snaked my arm gently and protectively around Sarah’s shoulder; gently tugging her closer to me before speaking up in a hushed volume] Okay, we made it this far, which is great, but we’re not out of danger yet. Let’s get to Pope and Kie, and then all of us get the hell out of here. [I suggested before nodding my head toward JJ; gesturing for him to lead the way. The sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better our chances would be of us surviving this]

[ofnotakook]

He’d be right behind me. It was a sense of comfort knowing I wasn’t alone.That I was nearly to safety but the question lingered of how long. Because I felt the bleeding on my hip, I felt the lost of blood that peeled from my skin. Not that Sarah was about to utter a word. If she did their plan of escaping would be jeopardized. And JJ and John B had risked it all for her. Kie and Pope were on the lower ground taking cover on her behalf. Sarah wasn’t selfish; she knew when to take one for the team. Her dad; his shots that were fired. It was venages for her; for the Pogues brainwashing her; but the truth was Sarah saw beneath the scars. She saw the truth. The perfect knit family wasn’t real. She had hoped her father would be okay; that he would let her go. Let the pogues go give John B what was rightfully his. 

But instead he saw me as property. I wasn’t a person to him. I was his daughter yes; but I also was my own mind and heard. All that to say I tried not to shake when I heard the gunshots in the distance. I had my hands holding onto the ladder as JJ slowly helped me down. Blood it was obvious at the edge of the ladder; I easily shook my head to JJ; indicating John B didn’t need to know. I was fine. I Swore I caught an edge of concern against his expression. Did JJ care? I asked myself as feet hit the pavement; the edge of the roof as we lowered ourselves down to the ground. His arm was comfort; he was there with me every step of the way. 

Reaching up with my cleared hand; I intertwined my palm with his own. Above my shoulder as I forced a smile. “ almost there.” I whispered as i felt the throbbing on my side; the dripping of redness down my leg; I just hoped it was dark enough to hide. Enough to give us a clear out before I had to say the words. I was shot; a haunting thought as I saw Kie and Pope in sight. 

“ Once we step down one last step, run to the gates, there’s a boat waiting okay. I’ll get the keys.” I told myself it was a solid plan; despite my obvious discomfort to myself. I leaned up to press a kiss to John B’s hand lips against his thumb before I gave the nod to Kie and Pope. 

It was time to run; it was our only chance; even if it meant the Pogues leaving without me; I could handle my injury and my dad; but John B needed an escape or his life was at risk; and right now I cared less about me and more about his safety. “ Run.” Whispered as hands released his own as my body heavily dropped to the ground. Shots being fired; I leaned down enough to swat; to hide under until the walkway cleared.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I gave a nod of relief to Sarah and JJ once our feet finally hit the pavement below. Sure, I knew we still had a challenge ahead of us, even more of one now that Ward knew I had taken Sarah, so I guarantee he wasn’t the only one firing a gun currently. Now we had him, and his whole damn security department firing at us, too. Regardless, we made it this far, which to some, seemed like an impossible feat in and of itself, but we’re still alive, so that’s something. I justified optimistically as Sarah told us the next part of the plan. Good thing we managed to get her out, because JJ nor I had come up with an escape plan. In normal pogue fashion, we planned to wing it once we reached the point… You know, assuming that we made it this far, I should say] Okay, babe. [I said as I heard her instruct us to “run,” and then she released my hand. Given how close I had already come to losing her, I wasn’t about to let her out of my sight; especially in a dangerous situation like this. With that protective thought in mind, I hadn’t run far before realizing she was no longer at my side, or even behind me] Sarah? Sarah, where are you? [I asked in a hushed volume as I started to back track to find her. It didn’t take me long before I nearly tripped over her as she laid down onto the ground] What are you doing? Are you okay? [Assuming maybe she tripped and hurt herself or something, which is why she didn’t get up and continue running with us. Either way, I waited for the latest bout of gun shots to fade out before I helped Sarah up from the ground. This time snaking my arm around her to keep her close as we prepared to catch up with the others] Can you walk? [Prepared to carry her on my back if she was hurt and couldn’t run. Whatever it took to get Sarah safely out of here, I was all for doing it. Sarah’s safety and freedom was my top priority right now]

[ofnotakook]

A getaway plan; honestly Sarah could easily say she had the grounds of the priority mapped out in her head. But the times she’s visited this house she could count on her hand. It was slim; but right now she had to save herself or she risked the chance of Ward getting his hooks not just in her; but it put the pogues in danger. The same people who risked their lives in order to save her. Sarah didn’t take it for granted; she knew she was a mess. She was someone who was torn between love and her family. But she was locked in her own room on more than one occasion. Her father proved he only cared about the gold. It stung; it made Sarah feel like shit; like she wasn’t enough for her own father. 

But now wasn’t the time; the end was near. She felt her knees wobbly, she felt the lost of blood elevate against her frame. Feet planted against the pavement; her eyes scanned the grounds until they reached Kie and Poper who had keys in their hands; they found the keys to the boat under one of my rocks. It was kinda my getaway car back in the day when I wanted to be reckless; I wanted an escape; apparently it was my younger self telling me to be prepared. Because right now our best bet was to run. Run through the pavements; the mountains of trees to get to the edge. I whispered the words. JJ didn’t need any admission; he ran like hell while guns were being fired. Fired at us; which is why I ducked. Not voluntarily; I had fallen to my knees. I had fell right to the ground. I felt my lungs closing off; I felt the air in my body slowly leaving, as I felt my frame hit the ground in a huff. 

I knew John B; he’d never leave without me. I was kinda surprised he hadn’t picked up on the trail of blood I left on the roof; the ladder in my wake. But to my surprise my secret was that a secret. Eyes closed growing heavy that was until I felt his hands roll onto my own palms. Fingers curled around his hands as I slowly pushed myself back onto my feet. “ I’m okay.” A fat lie I screamed at myself. The dirty blonde moved in the threes; in the brushes; her sneakers ran across the lawn until she heard her feet against the pavement. “ John B.. If I fall behind I need you to run like hell okay.” A demand not an ask. The female whispered in a low tone as fingers tighten around his palm. “ I was shot..’ The words stuck on her tongue as she paused; glancing down to her hip; her hip where there was a big ass stain of redness under her sweater; the white sweater now red; she bit down on her lip in fear; and now she’d be the reason they got caught; from running for their lives. 

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what, I would never leave Sarah behind. She was everything to me. Including my favorite pain in the ass that I argued with like we were already a married couple. Point is, I loved Sarah more than life itself, and even though things were a bit up in the open currently between us, that didn’t matter, because I would always come for her. Case and point when I saw her drop down and without a second thought or hesitation, I went back for her and then waited until she was ready to move before we continued our escape. My face turned pale though as I could feel the blood leaving my cheeks when I heard her confession about being shot] What? You were shot? [Quietly repeating the words back to myself, as if trying to process it, but also hoping that I had heard her wrong and she’d correct me now. Judging by the blood I saw that had stained her shirt, I knew I hadn’t imagined it. My worst nightmare was happening now in the fact that Sarah was hurt] It’s going to be okay. I’ll get you out of here and then we’ll get you help. [I assured her. No way in hell of knowing if she was going to be okay or not. I mean, she was shot. With a bullet. She was bleeding, and I had no way of knowing how much blood she’s lost already, because I was just now hearing she was hurt] Let’s get you on my back, and I’ll carry you out of here. [My way of letting her know that, no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her behind, so this way, if we get caught, we’re going to do so together. I silently justified as I squatted down as low as I could, so Sarah didn’t have to strain too much to shift onto my back]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s family was the why the Pogue’s were in this mess. The why we were fighting for our life’s. Namely the finger needed to be pointed towards my father. The man who wanted to be a proud family man, adoring father was willing to aim guns at his own daughter. He chose a hell of a long time ago. I wasn’t the kook anymore; I was a pogue; the family I decided I wanted. My pure love and adoration for John B. He was my everything. The boy I wanted to bicker with day and night. The boy I wanted to run on adventures with. He understood me, I never felt alone with him; I never felt like I had to pretend. I always felt trapped, the need to run from how I felt those strong feelings until I met him. Until we kissed; and fell insanely in love. 

And this island; the gold being unreachable now; was on me. I was the one who believed in my dad; kept opening my mouth and claiming he loves me, he’d never hurt me. I was the fool a disgrace not only had my brother tried to kill me drown me, my own dad wanted me dead. I had nothing but John B and the pogue’s. They were all I needed. 

Each leg of movement was starting to cause a strain on my body. I had no issues running; it was the open wound on my abdomen that was preventing me from moving fast enough. Knees weak, I could barely keep up. I heard the others in a distant reach the boat; the boat that was gassed up; the keys I knew where they were hidden the backup keys I mean. I remembered going out on this boat as a child; for our family trips on the ocean. What an embarrassing moment now considering. Leaning over my frame; eyes staring at the grass that touched my ankles. Head moving to stare between my legs in order to catch my panting breaths. I felt weak, I said the words. And I swore I heard John B stop; he paused in disbelief but the writing was pooling down my legs; the droplets of blood obvious. Tilting my head up I bit down on my lower lip to hold in the whine the pain of my wound. “ John B..” Name lingered on my tongue as tried to find the how I’d get this boy to leave without me. Instead he decided to bend down to the ground. I hesitated, I didn’t want to hold him back. “ I..” I started but I also know this boy; he’d risk it all for me. It didn’t make sense for both of us to risk being caught here, but with last minute thinking I pulled myself onto his back. Arms wrapped loosely around his neck. Legs wrapping around his waist, once I was safely on his back I rested my head on his shoulder. “ You can move now..” I echoed in a nearly teasing retort. Keep it light; until we escaped. 

A death trap of my own making.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what happened, I would never leave Sarah behind. I wasn’t stupid. I knew us breaking into her family’s compound tonight to break her out was a death trap. It was a fool’s errand, but I didn’t care. Sarah was in danger. She might not see how deranged her father and brother are, but I knew. I saw first-hand what her psychotic father was capable of, so I wouldn’t put anything past him now. Including him hurting his own daughter just to ensure he kept her far away from me. The man was a damn lunatic and the sooner I got Sarah away from him, the better off she’d be. The driving reason I broke into her room tonight. Well, “prison” was probably a more fitting word given the bars her father had put on her windows, so she could be kept there as his prisoner. Asshole. I thought in disdain as we ran toward some semblance of safety. I stopped though when I realized Sarah was no longer behind me. Panic setting in since it was dark, which made it difficult to see. Following the sounds of her breaths and rustling through the grass as I back-tracked back toward her. Shock and fear washing over me in hearing she had been shot. A part of me wondering if taking her back to her father was the best course of action, since his ties and pull could have a doctor here in moments. Still, something told me she wouldn’t want to go back there. She’d choose to take the risk to keep moving] I’ve got you. Don’t worry. I’d never leave without you, Sarah. [I assuredly whispered out as I helped her get situated safely on my back; ensuring her arms were wrapped tightly around my neck and her legs secured around my waist before I started through the trees and such in search of JJ and the others] “John B? Where the hell are you?” [I heard the familiar sound of JJ’s voice airing out nearby in a hushed tone. Moving in the direction of his voice, I eventually caught up with them. Keeping Sarah securely on my back as we reached them] “Ready for the next part of the plan? The diversion?” [JJ asked with pride in his voice, which prompted a skeptical look from me. All of us knowing JJ wasn’t the best at plans, but I did feel better when Pope and Kie chimed in to share that they had actually helped with this part of the plan] If it gets us out of here, then hell yeah, do it! [I muttered out as I watched JJ throw a lit flare in the direction of the wooded area we had all just escaped from, before throwing two others in separate directions of the same wooded area. Listening and watching as I saw a small explosion go off, followed by another, and then countless more. Pope and Kie explaining they rigged those while they were waiting for us to break Sarah out. Chuckling in pride and feeling a momentary sense of victory as I realized we temporarily stopped Ward’s guards from catching up; prompting us to continue running the remaining way off of the compounds and then into the city. Now it was just a matter of finding a place to hide out and to get Sarah medical attention] Sarah was shot, so we need to get her to a doctor before we do anything else. [I explained to the others; watching the wheels practically turning in their head on how to work this one out without all of us ending up getting caught]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s greatest fear was her friends, was the boy she loved getting hurt on her behalf. She always believed in the good in her father; that he had made mistakes. But when it came to their family he always held their best interest at heart. But all the evidence was staked against him. He faked his own death; he was okay with putting his arms around my neck. He was okay with shooting a bullet not knowing where it land. And Sarah was caught in that crossfire. She was scared that her now slow pace would hurt the pogues in the end. Her new Family. And she knew better than to fight with John B, than to plead with him to keep going without her. He’d never leave her behind. He was noble, he was the man that loved her more than his own life. 

And she’d risk it all for him too. He was the light in her new darkness. Sarah tried to hide it; the trail of blood she now kept behind her. She held the wound to her hip as tightly as she could; until she fell. She fell forward breathing heavily feeling the impact of loss blood. She was trying to move forward in the deep grass; but her feet stopped. She had hoped the male had moved far enough forward to forget; about her. But his voice was like a compass calling her home. And she had to smile to herself as she pulled herself onto his back. Bitting down on her lip knowing she was in pain; that pain in her side, the pool of blood that was now hitting his shirt. Head slowly came to rest on his shoulder; weakness inside of her. “ I know..” She whispered in a weakened tone. She held on for dear life; she had her arms wrapped around his neck, and her legs slid around his waist; a sense of safety; as we neared the spot where the others were. 

The night was dark; no one noticed her pale face; the weaken state she was in. Another phase to the plan? Her eyes trailed over to the smirks of her friends; the explosions that they had in fact thrown in the direction of each guard growing on their tails. A small smirk tugged at her lips. Severs Ward right, to come for family; and you get burned. The others glanced at her; as the elephant in the room was exposed. She was shot; weak; blood pooling out of her as she spoke. “ I’m fine.” She said as she rested her head back down on his shoulder. She vaguely heard JJ make a plan. “ We run into town. There’s abandoned buildings, maybe we find a doctor office on our way.” It wasn’t settle or optimistic in any form; but maybe if we found supplies; I could stitch up my own wound. I had no desire to see a doctor again; nor could we trust any person wouldn’t go running to Ward. So I had barely said a word; leaving the decision up to John B; he was the fighter; the leader in this mess. I’d trust him; I’d follow him anywhere.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I nodded in response to JJ’s suggestion. No offense to my best friend, or anything, but when he came up with plans, they usually crashed and burned. Then again, his idea to break Sarah out wasn’t his worst plan. Mind you, she did get shot as a result of the escape, but I don’t know if I can necessarily blame JJ’s plan for that, or just pin the blame on Ward for being a deranged and psychotic piece of shit] I think heading toward the town is a good idea, but Sarah definitely needs a doctor. Kai, you still have the fake IDs we had made up for all of us, right? [Kai nodded in response while flashing me a confused look] Okay, so if we go to a doctor’s office or hospital, we can use the fake IDs, so Sarah’s identity doesn’t get back to her father. Either way, we need to get the bullet out of Sarah, and get her stitched up. That’s our first priority once we get off of this property. [I explained. Knowing Sarah was getting weaker from the blood loss, so the sooner we got her gunshot wound tended to, the more at ease I would feel that she’s going to be okay. Honestly, at this point in time, my only concern was Sarah. I kept that thought to myself though, because I knew if I startled to unravel with worry, everyone else would begin unraveling too. Bottom line, we weren’t going to make it out of this situation alive if we didn’t remain level headed and make the right decisions]

[ofnotakook]

Right decisions; was it ever in our nature? To be smart, to not lead on impulse? In the short time Sarah spend with John B and the pogues, she’s learned JJ and John B tended to make decisions on a whim. They tended to come up with a plan and without thinking ran with it. Granted it Sarah owed her life to the poges, she owed the idea that she was released from the bars of her own bedroom due to them. And she appreciated the fact given the limbo state the male and myself were tethered into that they risked it all for me. The wrath from my dad; the Camerons’s who I was learning spelled terrible news. Sarah always believed in her dad; the type of man he was. He was kind, he cared about his family wanted to provide for us. But the money the power it gave a person it tended to steamroll you into a horrible person. Sarah couldn’t believe her eyes; the lengths her dad was willing to go, harming his own daughter, embedding Rafe despite his own crimes. She felt disgusted with her own family. The blonde knew where she belonged; where her heart was. Holding onto dear life to the man she currently had her arms wrapped around. 

The blonde let nimble fingers graze over the thin layer of his shirt; the weak grip she held. Her wound was obvious, the blood pooling down her leg. Ward got her damn good. And Sarah hated her fate was on the edge of a line. Doctors wasn’t an option, she knew this island. She knew Ward was probably on a warpath now for blood. Pogues won by letting my escape happen, and now he’d be paying off any source he could, to get his hands on me. 

The female listened despite her own body was fading, head rested upon his head; the comfort of his scent, she was always safe with him. Eyes blinked open and closed, and she slowly let her weaken vision take in the pogue’s who glanced in every direction Smoke of the explosion was all in the air, intoxicating. “ Go South, we get on the boat, and port half way down the island, there’s a hidden office, our best bets is escaping this house.” A thought for food; a hidden doctors office; one that may get me home sailing. 

Without the risk of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised that, in spite of her condition, Sarah was the one to air out the best and most sensible plan. Giving a nod in response as I looked toward JJ and the others] You heard her. Head south. [I said in agreement as I continued carrying Sarah on my back as we all made route south toward the docks. Knowing our risk was still higher than not of getting caught, but she was right… If we had a chance of getting out of here and to freedom, this was the one with the best odds. More than anything though, I just wanted to get her somewhere safe, so she could get some medical attention. I could hear by how weak her voice was that she was losing a lot of blood. The longer this continues, the worse her chances of survival were. Once we reached the docks, we ducked into the shadows until reaching the boat. I made sure to get Sarah on safely, and then I laid her down across one of the seats to rest, while I helped JJ and Pope to untie the ropes; all the while Kai started up the boat. Knowing we’d all need to work together, and to do so quickly, or else we weren’t getting out of here alive] Okay, Kai, we’re clear. Get us the hell out of here. [I called out to her as me and the other guys pushed the boat away from the dock to give it an oomph and then once the boat was cleared from the sides, I returned to Sarah] How bad is it? [I asked as I grabbed the first aid kit stowed under the one seat. Not that I could do much with my incredibly limited experience and knowledge, but I felt helpless by not doing what I could for her now. Besides, if I could at least slow the bleeding, that would give her the best fighting chance to stay alive until we were able to get her medical attention]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt like she had lost everything. She used to be the girl who would always go to the beck and call of her dad; he used to be the incredible man she grew up with. He used to be the man who read bedtime stories to her. He used to give her a glass of milk each time. She had so many fond memories of him. But now; it felt like those memories were tainted. Sarah had always believed in him, she fought the urges to go against him. Seeing his boat explode it destroyed her; she broke up with John B the man she loved for him, because he was glad the man who took his father away got justice. Was dead. And suddenly it felt like our love wasn’t meant to be. 

And now Sarah was bleeding out because of the man who was supposed to protect her. He shot fire at her; at her friends not caring of the consequences. That was the sadness of the reality. That I was alone. I couldn’t turn to my sister, I couldn’t protect. I had to put myself first, and that was the pogues my made family. We lift each other up, we go to bat for each other. And I knew the high stakes. I knew what my father was capable of. I had to wonder how I had any ounce of love for him after what he’s done. Lying to protect Rafe, letting my brother get away with attempting to drown me, he let me get drugged. He’d rather put harm to me than take accountability. And I had to swallow that truth. With a heavy head I felt like my vision was becoming blur as I spurred the last task at hand. Hands loosen on the grip against John B’s shirt, as my eyes drifted shut. How long had we walked? Before I heard the rustling of feet hitting the docks. And I felt my body being dropped gently into the boat, back pressed against a hard backing on the edge. Slowly eyes lifted seeing blurs. 

Figures moving left and right; the “ Ropes done.” I heard from JJ as both boys plopped themselves down on the boat. Pope was at the wheel with Kie, I heard the soft whispers of nothingness. And I heard his voice, the one that always dragged me home. And I wanted to be honest, as my hand slowly nimbly moved against the dam fabric of my sweater as I lifted it up. And I saw it the blood, it was dark, and it explained why I felt faint. Turning my eyes to the man I loved; John B was preparing to bandage up the wound for a short time. “ It doesn’t look pretty, I’ll have a nasty scar if anything.” I aired out attempting to lighten the mood as I felt the boat move as if it was full of lighten. 

This remembered me of when I saved his ass, when we first started out; on our little adventure. A shy grin turned against my lips as I spoke. “ Last time one of us had to bandage the other up, I was sneaking you into the house, I saved your ass, are we finally repaying the favor?” I asked with a sense of teasing in my voice. Definitely not the time, but I needed a laugh a small brief moment for just us.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Although I knew now wasn’t the time for jokes and quips, I still appreciated the fact that Sarah was trying to keep the mood light between us. Maybe if the circumstances had been reversed, I would have been all for cracking jokes… Hell, I would more than likely be cracking them too. Given that Sarah had been shot and was rapidly losing blood though, I definitely wasn’t in a fun and games kind of mindset. For her sake though, I did flash her a grin as I leaned down to press a tender kiss to her forehead] Well, I figured I owed you so it was high time I stepped up and returned the favor. Maybe next time you want me to save you though, let’s go with something that involves less blood shed and need for panic… Deal? [Giving it my best effort to joke in return. In the meantime I grabbed the first aid kit. My hand shaking slightly as I quickly fished around for some bandaging and things I thought I could use to stop the bleeding] Either way, I’m putting you in charge of keeping an eye on me to make sure I’m doing this right. I mean, doctor stuff is new territory for me so I’ll need the supervision. All that to say, eyes open at all times, okay? [My casual way of requesting to Sarah that I wanted her to keep her eyes open. Afraid that if she closed them and fell asleep, I might lose her. A thought that I couldn’t bear to consider as I started to do what I could to apply pressure to her wound and then applied some gauze and then bandaging too, all in an effort to stop the significant bleeding she was currently experiencing]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was well aware of the bleeding that now wasn’t the time for her humor, for her need to crack a joke open. But Sarah could see how scared he was; it was in his eyes. She was scared herself that she was about to take her last breath, by the hands of her own father. Ward had no idea she was assuming that he had aimed for her; she had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. Her own father pulled the trigger; he was aiming a weapon at her friends, at the man she loved. And now she was facing deaths door; she remembered the last time. 

John B was the one aching in pain as she ran her fingers with a cold rag over his blooded wound; which is why the dirty blonde showed amusement. Or she was going nuts with the lack of blood in her system. Eyes had slowed movement as he spoke; and she knew this was his way of saying “ Stop Sarah.” As if she planned on taking a bullet tonight. But her smile soften knowing feeling the panic under his tone, and her slimmed hand; her hand reached to touch his arm as a soothing of reassurance that she was okay. “ I promise next time, I’ll tell my dad not to shoot.” She echoed with that sarcastic retort of hers. But Sarah was done with the jokes. Not that she had the energy. She felt like her body was giving out; she felt the color had now drained from her face in the dark. She barely felt the boat moving against the water; the ocean seas; the seas that used to bring soothing. That used to make her feel safe; and now she was trembling, she felt his hand on her wound; and she had glanced down the blood was soaking her skin, right through his hand. “ Use the guse to wipe around the wound, and then bandage it gently at least until we arrive.” To a doctor; assuming we had the money to get me treated; or this was the end. Her eyes landed back on his features, and she uttered an “ I love you.” As if it was the last words she’d say. 

Eyes kept fluttering open and shut in a daze, despite the promise to stay with him, to guide him through the process; she hardly felt her hand move down to her side; as if her limbs were jelly now. If only this boat would move any faster..

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I appreciated Sarah’s attempt to crack jokes now. That was kinda our thing, you could say, but at the moment, I felt far from laughing. I was worried and growing even more so with every passing second. Sarah was shot. She was bleeding out currently, and I had no way of knowing if we’d get her medical attention in time to save her] Speed up the boat! Let’s go! [I yelled out to Pope and Kie as I saw Sarah’s eyes close. Judging by the worried look on JJ’s face, I knew he was thinking the same thing I was] Hurry the hell up, JJ, and help me pack her wound. Quick, get those gauze pads from the bag! [My voice shaking in building worry as JJ did as I ordered; grabbing me what I needed as I tossed the now soiled and blood soaked gauze pads to the side as I took the clean ones from JJ’s grasp. My hand shaking as I pressed it against Sarah’s gunshot wound. After what felt like a damn eternity, the boat pulled to a stop. I didn’t exactly know where we were at the moment, but at this point Pope and Kie were tying off the boat to the pier, so it wouldn’t go anywhere, and then they rushed toward us] “Come on. I got word that there’s a surgeon in town who handles cases like this for the right price.” [Pope explained which prompted my brows to furrow in confusion] “Get Sarah, let’s go.” [Kie instructed, which prompted me to tape off the currently gauzed padding I had in place, then JJ helped me to lift Sarah carefully out of the boat and onto the pier. Once JJ and I were on the pier, I cradled Sarah securely in my arms] “Here, take this bag. It should be enough to get her treated. Pope and I will stay with the boat.” [Kie said as JJ grabbed the bag and the address of the warehouse doctor, and then we rushed through the dark night air toward the provided address. A less than ideal situation from all angles given Sarah’s condition and the fact that we were in an unfamiliar place looking for the location of a doctor that we knew nothing about. Talk about a wild card move, at its best] Stay with me, Sarah. We’re going to get you help. Keep fighting. [I called out to her as JJ barked out instructions and I merely kept up with his pace as I carried Sarah in my arms toward our destination]

[ofnotakook]

A scar that might kill me. 

It was a thought for Sarah; she felt like she’d been through the ringer. Her own family was willing to sacrifice her for their own benefits. Sarah once thought the world of her father; of the family. But now she knew the truth they only craved the wealth they’d stomp on anyone who dared to stand in their way. Sarah’s own brother tried to drown her, and now her father was the one who pulled the trigger. Obviously he was aiming for John B, but Sarah knew she’d always end up in the cross fire. 

Not that she cared, she’d rather die than live without him. The words she said that night; on the smaller boat, as John B fought for his life, to escape the death sentence. And I meant it; I loved John B and yeah we fought; we ended up screaming at each other. But i’d do anything to be with him, and now as I was fighting for my own life; I only hoped the pogues survived. Sarah was falling unconscious, she had felt her body shutting off. The last words she spoke were of love, an undenying world of love for him. But she felt the blood lost. She felt her wounds becoming fetel. And she heard the urgent, the eagerness in her man’s voice as she felt the vague packing of her wound. How long had it been? 

She had no idea, because she felt darkness overcome her. She felt like she was falling into limo. She barely felt John B and JJ as they wrapped her sim arms around their shoulders and held her up. Enough to look like Sarah was walking, but she was dragged towards the clinic, and she barely heard the exchange when the surgeon called the three up. And with each step, she felt a slight ache in her body. An ache she wanted to subside. But Sarach knew she had to fight; to live, to open her eyes again. She felt her frame fall to a bedding; as her head hung down as the surgeon whispered. “ It’ll be okay, fight.” And She fel the breathing tube come to her nose, she felt the bleeding that was exposed. The doctor mumbled a few words to her friends. “ Do you have the money? She may not live.” He uttered and I felt my body weak. My own shadow breathing as my eyes slowly woke, for a second to see the unfamiliar surroundings, the walls brown. The tubes connected to me, I was scared. But I couldn’t move before my eyes went shut all over again. 

The doctor took the money and he soon took a tool; to save me, if it did any good, because right now I felt like I was on the brink of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

“Yeah, man. Here.” [JJ aired out in response to the shifty doctor’s request for money, before handing him a bag with money in it. My eyes shifted into a roll watching the doctor count it. So much for a moral code to save a life. Apparently all this asshole cared about what money] Just save her. Please. [I aired out pleadingly as I held Sarah’s hand with my one hand; all the while gently stroking back the hair from her face with my free hand. After a moment or so the doctor seemed satisfied with the amount of money JJ gave him inside that bag, and then he began. Watching as he first put Sarah under with what I assumed to be some kind of anesthesia before he grabbed a questionable looking scalpel so he could begin making the first cut. I knew in my gut that trusting this doctor might be the worst idea we’ve ever had, but at the same point, our hands were tied. It was either this option or we’d lose Sarah. Sure, his “she may not live” statement didn’t leave me with much confidence in his skills, but I had to believe in Sarah now. Sarah was strong. She was brave. If anyone could fight this, it was her] Come on, baby. Fight this. Don’t you dare leave me. Fight, baby. Fight. [I gently pleaded in her ear before pressing a tender kiss to her forehead] “Keep watch.” [I heard the doctor instruct of JJ before giving me a knowing sort of look and then a nod] “Here we go.” [The doctor said in less than a confident tone as he made the first cut; taking the scalpel across Sarah’s skin in order to remove the bullet from her body. It was excruciating to watch, but I promised myself that no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her side] “Grab those gauze pads and some gloves. Pour some of that vial with sanitizing solution directly over the incision spot and then place the gauze pads firmly across the area to slow her bleeding. We don’t want her losing more blood than she already has.” [The doctor instructed; forcing me to release Sarah’s hand, so I could assist in the surgery. After what felt like an eternity, he finished; managing to remove the bullet and then to seemingly successfully repair damage to her wounded organ internally. Once he finished, he stitched her up then covered the wound with a significant amount of gauze pads and medical tape] “It’s a wait and see, at this point, so let’s hope she’s a fighter.” [The doctor said while washing his hands in the sink in the corner of the room] She is. [I flatly said in response before removing my gloves and washing my own hands once the doctor had finished. After ensuring my hands were clean, I returned to the table where Sarah rested and I took her hand in my own] You’re a fighter, Sarah. The strongest person I know, so fight this. I’m not going anywhere. [I had no way of knowing if she could hear me, but I didn’t care. On the off chance that she could, I was going to remind her of her strength and ability to fight this now]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt the screams into darkness. She felt like she was on a cloud in limo. She had no control of her body; she felt like she was paralyzed. She didn’t have the power to move, she barely felt her body being held up. She didn’t want to die, she didn’t want to be traped in her own bedroom. She never asked her own father to shoot bullets at her and her friends. Sarah suddenly felt like her once simply life was a cycle of nightmares. Death on our door steps, the rush of running; being on the med. Sarah knew her getting shot was her fault. If she had just listened to John B weeks ago; that Ward didn’t have my best interest at heart. 

If I had stayed with Pogues instead of trusting my now psychic family. One trying to kill me left and right. Sarah had learned her lesson, the only people she could count on was herself, the pogues, even her sister she just hoped her sister was okay. She knew she was stipid to be thinking about anyone but herself now. But she held sympathy for others. The aching in her body was enough to force her to scream in pain if she wasn’t knocked out. She vaguely heard the way her body gently was placed down on a mental table.  I vaguely felt John B his breath in my ear as he tried to reassure me I was okay, I was a fighter. I was in my own little bubble. The darkness in my lids, the way my body was lifeless, especially as the doctor did insert his tool into my body, if I was awake I’d be screaming. I barely felt it; probably from the anesthesia. I couldn’t move, I had no idea how long I was out. I could vaguely hear the voices as the doctor echoed out it would be touch and go. Would I be surviving? Was I still bleeding out? Sarah felt the stirs in her mind as she laid still. Baby, fight.. Words echoed in my ears. 

John B, he needed me, he needed me to be strong, to fight through the blood lost. I couldn’t let him down. I was groggy when I suddenly felt the strength to open my eyes. The small light above me it flashed my eyes forcing me to squit, and I felt John B’s head on my stomach, not on the wounded skin, but right under. I was aching as I let out a soft wine. My hand pale as I lowered my hand onto his dirty brown locks, fingers slowly combed through his hair. “ John B.” I echoed in a whisper; I couldn’t speak and I noticed JJ was sitting in the chair, eyes closed, even JJ stayed. A made family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Hours passed by and there was no change. Sarah was so still and I had no way of knowing if she’d ever wake up. The doctor didn’t sound hopeful. Made a snide remark about her chances of pulled through as he greedily took our money and then ran like hell like some kind of coward. Clearly it was all about money for him. As more time passed, I found my head resting against Sarah’s side. Near her incision but not close enough to cause any further damage. I just wanted and needed to be close to her now. JJ wasn’t far away. He took a look out to make sure Ward nor any of his men were nearby before he’d return to the private room here and take a seat in the chair adjacent from where Sarah and I rested now. I didn’t know how much more time had passed… Felt like an eternity even though I knew it was probably just a few more hours, but eventually I heard the faint sound of her voice, as well as felt her fingers rustle gingerly through my hair. At that my head immediately shot up and I looked at her. Relief flooding my face and expression currently] You’re awake! Thank God! [I uttered out in evident relief as I pressed a gentle kiss to the back of her hand] How are you feeling? The black market doctor left a few things for pain if you need it. [The guy wasn’t exactly reliable but he did seem to save Sarah’s life, so at the moment, I was thinking a bit more favorably of him. Maybe he wasn’t a total money-hungry quack after all. Jury was still out on that one though] Do you want some water? [I asked as I had already picked up a fresh bottle of water; prepared to give her some if she was thirsty]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt weak, she ha no idea as to how long she’d been laying her. The memory of her father; of how easily he had aimed a gun at her, at her friends because of what? Jealousy? Because he wanted to hold this wild control over her? Sarah had once desired to please her family. She had once idolize her father the memory of us at the docks when I was only a little girl it clouded who I knew he was. 

But a few hours before he was so willing to throw me under the bus. He was so willing to let me bleed out on our yard. Because of his hate for the Pogues. I was hurt, I was feeling betrayed but at the same time, relieved as I felt my body come to life. I felt my eyes lift open as I adjusted to the dim light. I saw JJ in the corner as my eyes peeled over to John B who had his head rested against my palm. And I knew I was lucky, he was here. He loved me, and I had to let my fingers run soothingly through his dirty blonde locks. A small smile peeled at my lips. And I knew I couldn’t move. I felt numb to my core as my body was now healing from the blood lost, Sarah wasn’t going to jump up, the fear of Ward on our tail was aching against my own skin. The blonde had peered up at him; the man she loved so much. 

“ I’m okay.” As okay as I was going to be. The wound had been deep, the stitched up wound was felt as my eyes slowly moved to the man I loved. My hand moved to reach for John B. And I felt a sigh of relief escape my own lips. And I felt my gaze linger on him. “ I’m sorry, I’m sorry my dad is a crazy,” My words could never compare to the pain my family has caused him, the pogues and I wanted to do my part to mend those fences. “ Yes.” I echoed to the option of water my throat felt dry but I wasn’t going to jump forward, I slowly lifted my head up to get to a sitting position. My free hand had moved to my side, knowing the pain; the wound my own family caused.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I felt mounds of relief when I heard Sarah’s voice. She was alive. She was awake, and she was speaking. Lifting her hand to my lips as I pressed a couple of kisses to the back of her hand, then gently lowered her hand back down onto the metal table she was lying on] Hey, don’t apologize. It’s not your fault. All that matters is keeping you safe and away from your deranged family. [No matter what, I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t let Ward harm Sarah again. I thought to myself as I brought a fresh bottle of water to Sarah’s lips, so she could drink as much as she wanted and needed. I knew she needed time to rest and heal, but the sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better I could guarantee her safety from her family. One could hope, at least. I mean the way Ward operated, and the fact that he knew people all over the world, I wasn’t sure exactly how far remote we would need to go, and for how long either for that matter, in order to keep Sarah safe, but no matter what, I’d do what it takes. I came close to losing Sarah this time… Too close for comfort, so I wasn’t willing to take any chances with her safety again. At least not until Ward was no longer a threat to her] Once you’re well enough, we’re going to get you out of here. Pope and Kie are keeping an eye on the boat, and when you’re strong enough, we’re all getting on that boat, and getting as far away as possible. We figure with some distance and preferably some place off the grid, eventually your father will stop looking for you. [Maybe wishful thinking since Ward wasn’t one who took well to losing, but one could hope he’d eventually give up and accept that Sarah was gone]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah kept asking herself the obvious how she’d been blind. How she was capable of still holding a torch of love for her family. With all the crimes all the ways her own brother tried to murder her; sending drug mules her way, being the one that nearly drowned her to death. And now her own father; was so mad at the Pogues so terrified of losing his daughter to the pogues; not wanting to lose the fight that he aimed and shot me. The blood that once covered her fingertips, the blood the redness that ran over her sweater, it was an image Sarah couldn’t erase.  

Her friends, her boyfriend? Cut into the crossfires because of her fucked up  family. And even now as she opened her eyes; said a few words, she felt the aching on her wound, damn that stitch is gonna hurt like hell. But it was comforting to feel his touch, to witness his lips touching her knuckles once again. John B, he was her anchor that kept her whole. A soften expression; a smile curled at the corners of her lips as she saviored his touch; his lips against her skin. “  They drugged me, they forced me here. I feel trapped like no one is safe in that house, but my sister..”  A fear for the little Cameron it rocked me whole now, as I felt the lump forming in my throat. Wheezie she was innocent had no idea who’s roof she was living under. Like myself; I’d been blinded from the truth. But now my father was deranged; he passed off onto Rafe; and Rose was clueless as ever a pond in the game; until she crossed Ward. 

A slight cough was heard; as the blonde felt the wetness hit her tongue, one sip of water turned into half the bottle until she released the top from her lips and she slowly sat herself up, her palms hitting the metal of the table to hold herself up. Nuts insane considering her own wounds she wore. But her eyes ran along John B’s features with ease. “ You know he won’t let that happen. He blames you the pogues for his princess no longer being in his care. I’m a game for him to win..” A sad truth, an ached formed in her chest now.  “ I wouldn’t blame you if you allowed the pogues to leave me here for  dust to get away. I don’t want to bring you down, or put you and pogues in danger..” Not again the words hid  at the tips of her tongue. 

Danger; our names, but Ward he’d kill to end the war..I was terrified the lengths he’d go no matter how safe I felt with John B; he’d get hurt because of me. A pill I needed to swallow now.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, that would never happen. [I flatly replied with a matter of fact sort of shrug. Sure, I knew if this was just about Sarah, maybe JJ and the others would have high-tailed it out of here. Not necessarily Pope since he had a heart to do the right thing, but Kie was what you could say, hot and cold toward Sarah, so it wouldn’t take much for her to bail on Sarah. And well, JJ hated Kooks in general, so he had no loyalties to Sarah either. Thing was though, they all knew I’d literally die to protect Sarah, and the Pogues would always put their lives on the line to protect each other. All that to say, as long as I was staying put at Sarah’s side, the Pogues wouldn’t be going anywhere either because they’d always have my back, just like I’d always have theirs too. We fought fiercely for each other] Even if the others decided to high-tail it out of here, I’d never leave your side. Unless you tell me to go, I’m not going anywhere… [I started to say before an amused smirk followed] And even then, I can’t promise I’d actually leave. You know I’m stubborn when people try to tell me what to do. [I teased even though that was the truth] Either way, once you’re well enough, we’re all getting the hell out of here, and getting to safety together. Until then, just rest and heal. [I said as I gave her hand another gentle squeeze. My way of reassuring her that we were all in this together; no matter what the outcome]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah knew her choices  as of late not only disappointed herself but those around her. Sarah never wanted the wealth, she never wanted to be accepted as the princess Kook. That title had been given to her. People made assumptions about her; her personality; how she followed the kook business, and yes once upon a time she was a kook. Bu from that one day running around with John B at chapel Hill, helping him seek answers to a quest she had no idea how over our heads we were. We were just kids running around aimlessly. But I saw that treasure hunting look in his eyes; the way his eyes lit up at a map, and I mused, I admired who John B. And he made me want more for myself. 

One day; one rain kiss on the docks was all it took for the dirty blonde to feel hooked. He’s who she loved, and even with death upon us; my dad probably having a search squad on our heads. I had let the pogues down; when I had let John B go, I was angry, I was sad when I thought my dad died, and john B was just so glad to see him fall through the cracks. My dad was money hungry, he was awful he killed, he allowed Rafe to get away with Murder, but he was my dad; but now as I groggily came out of my unconscious state; I remembered the cage I felt locked in. I recalled his aim, the gun shot wound that should’ve killed me. My own father aimed the trigger, and right now Sarah knew in her gut she was a pogue, and she appreciated the friendships she made. Eyes glanced over for comfort to the boy that made her heart race. And her pinky found his; a trace of her finger against his own. 

“ I made that mistake once, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for letting you go John B, I was..” Pausing briefly before a sigh could be heard escaping her lips. “ I was hurting, I didn’t want to believe my dad was this monster. I know you said you’ve always got me, but I wouldn’t blame you if you decided no one chances.” Chances to love me, to be together after this horror war my dad had, all the times guns aimed at us because of him, a war he wanted to win on behalf of me. One he already lost. 

Because my heart; who I was, it was a pogue; my known family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I get it, Sarah. Before I came into your life and opened your eyes to who your dad and brother really are, you had a really tight bond with your dad. Naturally you'd want to fight to protect his reputation. It only makes sense that you wouldn't want to believe your dad was capable of something like that. If the situation was reversed, and it was me in your shoes, I probably would have done the same thing as you. [I admitted honestly. It was the truth. If this was my dad, I would have fought to protect his reputation too. It's what you do for the people you love. I'd do it for Sarah and the pogues too because I consider them my family. No matter what, I'd always have their backs, just like I know the pogues would have mine] You'll never run out of chances with me, Sarah. I hate to break it to you, but I love you, so until you say otherwise, you're stuck with me. [As much truth as there was in my words, I aired out that honesty with a joking tone] Anyway, for now, we just need to get your strong enough that we can move somewhere safer for the duration of your recovery. [I knew where we were would suffice for now, but it would only be a matter of time before Sarah's dad figures out we're hiding out here currently. We'd cross that bridge if and when the time comes. For now I wanted Sarah to get a little stronger and heal up a bit before we decide to move her]

[ofnotakook]

I can always trust in you

@apogueforlife 

I can always trust in you 

Trust; it had to be earned. Love; it had to be developed. For Sarah she always had her guard up. Each time she’d get close to letting someone in the other shoe would drop, she’d freeze up, and run in the other direction. With each boyfriend she ever had she had the urge to run. To distant herself when she felt like she was trapped. When she felt the pressure to feel more than what she did. Topper he liked the idea of her. He loved the idea of being with her; but he wasn’t in love with her. 

There’s only one boy Sarah loved; and that was John B. It happened unexpectedly. It happened on a day she never saw coming. That day stayed with her. The day we went to chapel hill; the day we had fun dressing each other up. The day we pretended to be our alter egos; Val and Vlad. It was nice to be herself. I didn’t feel the pressure to be perfect. I didn’t feel like my family was watching me, I was myself. I felt safe, I felt like John B saw me despite all the flaws I had. He loved me for me, and I loved him. It was a roller coaster of a relationship if you asked me. We had gone from barely knowing each other; to falling completely utterly in love. I gave up my kook card for him. I knew the obsluces we’d be facing now, the pogue’s vs the kook. But nothing made me question my loyalty to him. To the Pogues. It got messy with my dad; him being the reason Big John was gone. The reason why the gold was taken. The reason I was on the run with John B. The gold felt so close yet so far. We managed to clear John B’s name but that’s because Ward decided in his best interest to fake his own death and act like the hero. The guy that claimed to have been a killer in order to protect his own son. Rafe just the thought of being near him made me sick to my stomach. For a second I was upset, I felt like my whole body ached when I witnessed the boat blow up. When I witnessed my father shatter beyond the sea. And that’s when I saw the truth; what led to us being torn apart; what led to John B and I no longer being together. He had been happy to ward dead; and I couldn’t exactly find the words to blame him. He took everything from him. But at the end of the day; he was my dad. I was hurting and I remembered that look all too well; the look of proudnessI felt like I was seeing another person. I was grieving the dad I once looked up to, to the dad that I was once his princess. I needed John B to hold me, to make me feel like it was always going to be okay. But it suddenly felt like us it wasn’t meant to be.. 

Walking away for yourself; was all you could do. It was hard to be near him; to be pulled back into the adventure; to the cross. But for Pope I’d be there; awkwardness assured. Sarah didn’t know if she should make eye contact with him; or just stay silent. Silence seemed better; until that night; we had a plan to get the cross from Rafe; the big truck was parked outside my house. JJ and Pope were hidden behind the bushes. I was determined to walk inside; to get the key to unlock the truck; how we’d get the heavy cross out was a big ass story of it’s own. But I had made two steps to the gates, one glance backwards; I saw him John B was about to get up; and for a second I found myself hopeful; maybe this was the moment of the unknown. What comes next? Dark hues met for a second and I swore the air was taken out of my lungs; but he didn’t budge, didn’t move. Giving me the indication we had nothing left to say. That was the last memory I had of him; of us staring at each other. 

Head leaned against the gated up windows of my room at the barbados house, The house I was locked into. The boat felt like a nightmare; I was drugged by my own family. Rose had put a drug in my tea. Rafe and had helped her execute the plan; to force me here against my will. I remembered telling Ward when he claimed John B only cared about the treasure about the gold that I was just stuck in the cross hair that he was wrong. That John b would find him and come for him once I went missing. How wrong had I been? I wanted to blink back the tears that dared to fall. I was a pogue at heart; I chose it for John B because I loved him, despite our differences he’d always have a permanent place in my heart. It had been weeks since we left on the boat, I had tried to zone out the conversations of my parents; I had pretended to be sleeping at times, but here once I had been pulled into my room I never left. I guess Ward was afraid I’d run, or threaten to tell the cops his own daughter was kidnapped against her will. Give or take. Sarah swallowed the lump in her throat; it had gotten dark. She smelt the tray of food that her sister left her outside the door. Her bed was an inch away; The light pink covers still in place, it had been a day or two since we arrived, and I had slept in my bed because that meant i was okay, that meant that I was adjusting to being here; in this house. When all I wanted was to break free. At the window, on the seat where my back was pressed against the wall. Head tilted towards the window, I could see the water; any boats that passed by. I was alone; and all I could hope was that the Pogue’s were okay that perhaps my dad was right they managed to get the cross and that’s all that mattered for Pope. Eyes moved to the stars; for a moment it was nice to believe we were looking at the same stars; as if John B was on his way; assuming my dad was lying. For now all I could do was hold hope; I’d find a way out; it was a done deal. 

Tomorrow; I’d work out a plan. The Pogues would have me, if I found him. We’d always have each other. A wistful thought as a hint of a smile tainted onto my lips.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Love. Definitely not something I ever believe really existed. I always saw it more as, in life, people come and go. The ones who matter will stick with you, through thick and thin. For me, that was the Pogues: JJ, Kie, and Pope. I don’t remember a time in my life when those three weren’t part of it, and something tells me, I’ll never shake them either. Not that I’d want to, cause they’re everything to me. Then Sarah Cameron busted into my life unexpectedly… One of those surprising moments where I got myself in a sticky situation, and Sarah Cameron, of all people, was the one who bailed me out of it. Even more surprising though was how I felt when I was with her. It was the first time in my life when I found myself wanting to be with a girl exclusively. In time she even made me rethink my original theory about love. Then, well, I guess you could say life happened, and we broke up. Sure, I knew I played a part in our break up. When her father died, I should have been more supportive of the toll that loss would take on Sarah. Yeah, the guy was bad news… A lying crook, which Sarah obviously knew too, but he was still her father. Given the bad blood I had with Ward, and also the fact that he murdered my father, could you really blame me for being relieved that the guy was finally gone? Right or wrong, it’s how I felt. This leading to the end of Sarah’s and my relationship. Still, in my heart I knew this wasn’t the end for us. A love like ours always finds a way back to one another. Naïve or not, I refused to see it any other way…

Then weeks passed and I was starting to wonder if it really had been the end for us. Mind you, I still wasn’t giving up, but instead of dwelling on what may or may not happen between me and Sarah, instead the Pogues and I focused on getting the cross back for Pope. It actually became a, “Kill two birds with one stone” type of adventure for us though, since word got to me that Sarah had been abducted by her family. Them ultimately boarding a ship with Sarah and the cross, allegedly heading to Barbados; knowing that was exactly where we would be going to. This was it… This was our chance to, not only help Pope get the cross back, but also for me to rescue Sarah too…

Given that us Pogues had made some enemies, and also the fact that we didn’t have so much as a pot to piss in, much less money to travel to Barbados, it took some work, a lot of time, and even more creativity on our parts before we finally reached Barbados. Once we did, I knew we needed to devise a plan to get back both Sarah and the cross. Of course JJ, as usual, came up with one of the worst plans I had ever heard. This saying a lot considering JJ’s had some really shitty plans, over the years. This one pretty much topped the other bad plans he’s had though; prompting all of us to shoot down his plan and come up with another one. Knowing it was either come up with a better plan, or go with JJ’s plan which will likely either get us all killed, or at the very least, we’ll end up locked up in some jail cell. In time we did come up with a new plan. Not a great one, but definitely better than JJ’s plan, so it was something, at least. For our part we decided one step at a time…

We’d wait till night, rescue Sarah first, and then once we had her safely out of that house and away from her deranged family, we’d devise a plan to get the cross back. I mean, it’s not like we could just knock on the front door, and request either. Not without being shot, that is. We couldn’t even break in and steal the cross without getting caught, since it was so damn heavy, it was going to take a hell of a lot of brute strength to carry it, so we’d just deal with that plan later. For now, my focus was on Sarah. Sure, I knew there was a chance I’d be the last person she’d want to see tonight, but given me and the Pogue’s rescuing her, or her remaining a hostage with her own family, I figured I was the lesser of the evils, so to speak. I justified as Kie and Pope remained look outs from the ground; keeping hidden to the garden area where they tried to remain unseen, while JJ and I went to the roof. With JJ’s help, he hoisted me down onto the balcony I had scoped out and learned led to the bedroom they were keeping Sarah locked in. Once I approached the balcony window, I peaked inside discreetly; making sure her family was nowhere in sight before I gave a couple of light taps on the window. My way of alerting Sarah that I was here. Of course the window was pad-locked, which just pissed me off more. How could they do this to Sarah? The Cameron’s definition of family was nothing more than a load of bullshit, if you ask me, because this isn’t how you treat family. I thought in building anger as I used the pin I had with me to trigger the lock. Once I heard it click, my eyes shifted up toward JJ. The thumbs up he gave me in reply assuring me he had cut the security system like he confidently told me he could easily handle. This was JJ, so although I’d trust him with my life, and well, I had a few times, I still held my breath as I slowly and gingerly opened the window; expelling a quiet sigh of relief when an alarm didn’t sound as I opened the window] Val…? [I quietly whispered her code name into the dark bedroom. Hoping it would soften any resentment she might have in seeing me here now] Vlad and the crew are here to spring you from here… [I further whispered into the dark bedroom as I waited for her to come over to the window; knowing we didn’t have long before someone would alert the Cameron’s that the security system had been hacked into, so the sooner we got out of there, the better our chances of getting out of here alive]

[ofnotakook]

The pogue plans never went according to plan. Not that Sarah was going to complain now considering. She was able to escape the bars that locked her into her old bedroom. She was tired of starving herself out of spite. She was tired of laying awake at night in fear that she might be dragged out of bed. She was tired of being forced to live the perfect life. Forced to smile for her parents; the only one in her family she liked was her sister Wheezie, she’s who I wanted to protect. But she had young opinions, didn’t see what our family was capable of. And given how much risk John B went through to find me, I had to go with him. Not that I wanted to stay trapped or that I’d risk his life to save my sister. 

I felt torn with myself now. I escaped; I was on the roof; I had survived the lies, I had survived my own father aiming a gun at me; of course to his unknown knowledge Ward did exceed in his aiming and catching fire on one of us. I doubted his attention was to hurt me. Yet again it felt like a toss up considering, he did try to strangle me to death; and drugged me to get onto that stupid boat. But I knew him to know the problem wasn’t my stubbornness, it was John B and the pogues. He was threatened, and right now the Camerons wasn’t my family; it was the pogues. I had chose them a long time ago weather I wanted to admit it or not. 

Safe; is what I felt; despite the pain that was pooling on my side; the white sweater was making it difficult to hide. But I felt his kiss; the graze of his lips on my head, a tenderness of who we were. A love language for us. Seeing as JJ had followed my lead; and started down the ladder; I had stepped forward turning my back to where my hues fell on the male I loved with all my heart. Despite our differences that did come to light when I uttered the words maybe we weren’t meant to be, to work out. 

A soulfulness in my stare as I uttered my words. “ Promise you’ll come down.” I mouthed the words “ I can’t lose you.” As my palm wasn’t already filled with my own blood. Taking my hand from side, I placed them firmly on the handles of the ladder, with one step and than the next. I caught sight of the droplets of blood hitting the ladder as I climbed down, It wasn’t until I reached the bottom, I felt JJ; place his hand on my hip in order to help me off when he wore this stunned expression. “ Sarah.” He mouthed, I knew he felt it; the blood that now covered his hand; I shook my head. “ Don’t say a word.” I had strength I’d be okay until I couldn’t walk anymore; He was about to say something when I hit him in the chest. 

John B would be in earshot; I couldn’t tell him yet; once we were in the clear I’d tell him, but I didn’t want him to worry about me, not after all the risks he took to save me. Pushing myself to the side, I eyed the small area where our feet hit the grass; Kie and Pope had to make it to the gates; where it led to the waterfront it was our get away. Our only glimmer of hope.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I promise. I’ll be right behind you. [I assured Sarah as I watched JJ go down the ladder first, to ensure it was safe for Sarah to follow. Once JJ gave the “all clear” signal, I gave Sarah and nod to begin descending the ladder] You’ll be okay. JJ will meet you at the bottom, and I won’t be far behind. [I reminded her as she started to descend the ladder. I ducked down lower to the roof as I heard the sound of more gunshots looming in the air. Once Sarah was about halfway down the ladder, I started to position myself onto the ladder; getting a good grip on the sides before I slowly began descending the ladder too. It wasn’t long before I could faintly hear Sarah and JJ safely at the bottom on the ground below the ladder, and I was following them moments later. After I reached the bottom, I noticed the concerned look JJ was giving me, but assuming it had something to do with the fact that we were all still in danger on the Cameron’s grounds, I didn’t question JJ on his strange look. Instead, I snaked my arm gently and protectively around Sarah’s shoulder; gently tugging her closer to me before speaking up in a hushed volume] Okay, we made it this far, which is great, but we’re not out of danger yet. Let’s get to Pope and Kie, and then all of us get the hell out of here. [I suggested before nodding my head toward JJ; gesturing for him to lead the way. The sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better our chances would be of us surviving this]

[ofnotakook]

He’d be right behind me. It was a sense of comfort knowing I wasn’t alone.That I was nearly to safety but the question lingered of how long. Because I felt the bleeding on my hip, I felt the lost of blood that peeled from my skin. Not that Sarah was about to utter a word. If she did their plan of escaping would be jeopardized. And JJ and John B had risked it all for her. Kie and Pope were on the lower ground taking cover on her behalf. Sarah wasn’t selfish; she knew when to take one for the team. Her dad; his shots that were fired. It was venages for her; for the Pogues brainwashing her; but the truth was Sarah saw beneath the scars. She saw the truth. The perfect knit family wasn’t real. She had hoped her father would be okay; that he would let her go. Let the pogues go give John B what was rightfully his. 

But instead he saw me as property. I wasn’t a person to him. I was his daughter yes; but I also was my own mind and heard. All that to say I tried not to shake when I heard the gunshots in the distance. I had my hands holding onto the ladder as JJ slowly helped me down. Blood it was obvious at the edge of the ladder; I easily shook my head to JJ; indicating John B didn’t need to know. I was fine. I Swore I caught an edge of concern against his expression. Did JJ care? I asked myself as feet hit the pavement; the edge of the roof as we lowered ourselves down to the ground. His arm was comfort; he was there with me every step of the way. 

Reaching up with my cleared hand; I intertwined my palm with his own. Above my shoulder as I forced a smile. “ almost there.” I whispered as i felt the throbbing on my side; the dripping of redness down my leg; I just hoped it was dark enough to hide. Enough to give us a clear out before I had to say the words. I was shot; a haunting thought as I saw Kie and Pope in sight. 

“ Once we step down one last step, run to the gates, there’s a boat waiting okay. I’ll get the keys.” I told myself it was a solid plan; despite my obvious discomfort to myself. I leaned up to press a kiss to John B’s hand lips against his thumb before I gave the nod to Kie and Pope. 

It was time to run; it was our only chance; even if it meant the Pogues leaving without me; I could handle my injury and my dad; but John B needed an escape or his life was at risk; and right now I cared less about me and more about his safety. “ Run.” Whispered as hands released his own as my body heavily dropped to the ground. Shots being fired; I leaned down enough to swat; to hide under until the walkway cleared.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I gave a nod of relief to Sarah and JJ once our feet finally hit the pavement below. Sure, I knew we still had a challenge ahead of us, even more of one now that Ward knew I had taken Sarah, so I guarantee he wasn’t the only one firing a gun currently. Now we had him, and his whole damn security department firing at us, too. Regardless, we made it this far, which to some, seemed like an impossible feat in and of itself, but we’re still alive, so that’s something. I justified optimistically as Sarah told us the next part of the plan. Good thing we managed to get her out, because JJ nor I had come up with an escape plan. In normal pogue fashion, we planned to wing it once we reached the point… You know, assuming that we made it this far, I should say] Okay, babe. [I said as I heard her instruct us to “run,” and then she released my hand. Given how close I had already come to losing her, I wasn’t about to let her out of my sight; especially in a dangerous situation like this. With that protective thought in mind, I hadn’t run far before realizing she was no longer at my side, or even behind me] Sarah? Sarah, where are you? [I asked in a hushed volume as I started to back track to find her. It didn’t take me long before I nearly tripped over her as she laid down onto the ground] What are you doing? Are you okay? [Assuming maybe she tripped and hurt herself or something, which is why she didn’t get up and continue running with us. Either way, I waited for the latest bout of gun shots to fade out before I helped Sarah up from the ground. This time snaking my arm around her to keep her close as we prepared to catch up with the others] Can you walk? [Prepared to carry her on my back if she was hurt and couldn’t run. Whatever it took to get Sarah safely out of here, I was all for doing it. Sarah’s safety and freedom was my top priority right now]

[ofnotakook]

A getaway plan; honestly Sarah could easily say she had the grounds of the priority mapped out in her head. But the times she’s visited this house she could count on her hand. It was slim; but right now she had to save herself or she risked the chance of Ward getting his hooks not just in her; but it put the pogues in danger. The same people who risked their lives in order to save her. Sarah didn’t take it for granted; she knew she was a mess. She was someone who was torn between love and her family. But she was locked in her own room on more than one occasion. Her father proved he only cared about the gold. It stung; it made Sarah feel like shit; like she wasn’t enough for her own father. 

But now wasn’t the time; the end was near. She felt her knees wobbly, she felt the lost of blood elevate against her frame. Feet planted against the pavement; her eyes scanned the grounds until they reached Kie and Poper who had keys in their hands; they found the keys to the boat under one of my rocks. It was kinda my getaway car back in the day when I wanted to be reckless; I wanted an escape; apparently it was my younger self telling me to be prepared. Because right now our best bet was to run. Run through the pavements; the mountains of trees to get to the edge. I whispered the words. JJ didn’t need any admission; he ran like hell while guns were being fired. Fired at us; which is why I ducked. Not voluntarily; I had fallen to my knees. I had fell right to the ground. I felt my lungs closing off; I felt the air in my body slowly leaving, as I felt my frame hit the ground in a huff. 

I knew John B; he’d never leave without me. I was kinda surprised he hadn’t picked up on the trail of blood I left on the roof; the ladder in my wake. But to my surprise my secret was that a secret. Eyes closed growing heavy that was until I felt his hands roll onto my own palms. Fingers curled around his hands as I slowly pushed myself back onto my feet. “ I’m okay.” A fat lie I screamed at myself. The dirty blonde moved in the threes; in the brushes; her sneakers ran across the lawn until she heard her feet against the pavement. “ John B.. If I fall behind I need you to run like hell okay.” A demand not an ask. The female whispered in a low tone as fingers tighten around his palm. “ I was shot..’ The words stuck on her tongue as she paused; glancing down to her hip; her hip where there was a big ass stain of redness under her sweater; the white sweater now red; she bit down on her lip in fear; and now she’d be the reason they got caught; from running for their lives. 

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what, I would never leave Sarah behind. She was everything to me. Including my favorite pain in the ass that I argued with like we were already a married couple. Point is, I loved Sarah more than life itself, and even though things were a bit up in the open currently between us, that didn’t matter, because I would always come for her. Case and point when I saw her drop down and without a second thought or hesitation, I went back for her and then waited until she was ready to move before we continued our escape. My face turned pale though as I could feel the blood leaving my cheeks when I heard her confession about being shot] What? You were shot? [Quietly repeating the words back to myself, as if trying to process it, but also hoping that I had heard her wrong and she’d correct me now. Judging by the blood I saw that had stained her shirt, I knew I hadn’t imagined it. My worst nightmare was happening now in the fact that Sarah was hurt] It’s going to be okay. I’ll get you out of here and then we’ll get you help. [I assured her. No way in hell of knowing if she was going to be okay or not. I mean, she was shot. With a bullet. She was bleeding, and I had no way of knowing how much blood she’s lost already, because I was just now hearing she was hurt] Let’s get you on my back, and I’ll carry you out of here. [My way of letting her know that, no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her behind, so this way, if we get caught, we’re going to do so together. I silently justified as I squatted down as low as I could, so Sarah didn’t have to strain too much to shift onto my back]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s family was the why the Pogue’s were in this mess. The why we were fighting for our life’s. Namely the finger needed to be pointed towards my father. The man who wanted to be a proud family man, adoring father was willing to aim guns at his own daughter. He chose a hell of a long time ago. I wasn’t the kook anymore; I was a pogue; the family I decided I wanted. My pure love and adoration for John B. He was my everything. The boy I wanted to bicker with day and night. The boy I wanted to run on adventures with. He understood me, I never felt alone with him; I never felt like I had to pretend. I always felt trapped, the need to run from how I felt those strong feelings until I met him. Until we kissed; and fell insanely in love. 

And this island; the gold being unreachable now; was on me. I was the one who believed in my dad; kept opening my mouth and claiming he loves me, he’d never hurt me. I was the fool a disgrace not only had my brother tried to kill me drown me, my own dad wanted me dead. I had nothing but John B and the pogue’s. They were all I needed. 

Each leg of movement was starting to cause a strain on my body. I had no issues running; it was the open wound on my abdomen that was preventing me from moving fast enough. Knees weak, I could barely keep up. I heard the others in a distant reach the boat; the boat that was gassed up; the keys I knew where they were hidden the backup keys I mean. I remembered going out on this boat as a child; for our family trips on the ocean. What an embarrassing moment now considering. Leaning over my frame; eyes staring at the grass that touched my ankles. Head moving to stare between my legs in order to catch my panting breaths. I felt weak, I said the words. And I swore I heard John B stop; he paused in disbelief but the writing was pooling down my legs; the droplets of blood obvious. Tilting my head up I bit down on my lower lip to hold in the whine the pain of my wound. “ John B..” Name lingered on my tongue as tried to find the how I’d get this boy to leave without me. Instead he decided to bend down to the ground. I hesitated, I didn’t want to hold him back. “ I..” I started but I also know this boy; he’d risk it all for me. It didn’t make sense for both of us to risk being caught here, but with last minute thinking I pulled myself onto his back. Arms wrapped loosely around his neck. Legs wrapping around his waist, once I was safely on his back I rested my head on his shoulder. “ You can move now..” I echoed in a nearly teasing retort. Keep it light; until we escaped. 

A death trap of my own making.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what happened, I would never leave Sarah behind. I wasn’t stupid. I knew us breaking into her family’s compound tonight to break her out was a death trap. It was a fool’s errand, but I didn’t care. Sarah was in danger. She might not see how deranged her father and brother are, but I knew. I saw first-hand what her psychotic father was capable of, so I wouldn’t put anything past him now. Including him hurting his own daughter just to ensure he kept her far away from me. The man was a damn lunatic and the sooner I got Sarah away from him, the better off she’d be. The driving reason I broke into her room tonight. Well, “prison” was probably a more fitting word given the bars her father had put on her windows, so she could be kept there as his prisoner. Asshole. I thought in disdain as we ran toward some semblance of safety. I stopped though when I realized Sarah was no longer behind me. Panic setting in since it was dark, which made it difficult to see. Following the sounds of her breaths and rustling through the grass as I back-tracked back toward her. Shock and fear washing over me in hearing she had been shot. A part of me wondering if taking her back to her father was the best course of action, since his ties and pull could have a doctor here in moments. Still, something told me she wouldn’t want to go back there. She’d choose to take the risk to keep moving] I’ve got you. Don’t worry. I’d never leave without you, Sarah. [I assuredly whispered out as I helped her get situated safely on my back; ensuring her arms were wrapped tightly around my neck and her legs secured around my waist before I started through the trees and such in search of JJ and the others] “John B? Where the hell are you?” [I heard the familiar sound of JJ’s voice airing out nearby in a hushed tone. Moving in the direction of his voice, I eventually caught up with them. Keeping Sarah securely on my back as we reached them] “Ready for the next part of the plan? The diversion?” [JJ asked with pride in his voice, which prompted a skeptical look from me. All of us knowing JJ wasn’t the best at plans, but I did feel better when Pope and Kie chimed in to share that they had actually helped with this part of the plan] If it gets us out of here, then hell yeah, do it! [I muttered out as I watched JJ throw a lit flare in the direction of the wooded area we had all just escaped from, before throwing two others in separate directions of the same wooded area. Listening and watching as I saw a small explosion go off, followed by another, and then countless more. Pope and Kie explaining they rigged those while they were waiting for us to break Sarah out. Chuckling in pride and feeling a momentary sense of victory as I realized we temporarily stopped Ward’s guards from catching up; prompting us to continue running the remaining way off of the compounds and then into the city. Now it was just a matter of finding a place to hide out and to get Sarah medical attention] Sarah was shot, so we need to get her to a doctor before we do anything else. [I explained to the others; watching the wheels practically turning in their head on how to work this one out without all of us ending up getting caught]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s greatest fear was her friends, was the boy she loved getting hurt on her behalf. She always believed in the good in her father; that he had made mistakes. But when it came to their family he always held their best interest at heart. But all the evidence was staked against him. He faked his own death; he was okay with putting his arms around my neck. He was okay with shooting a bullet not knowing where it land. And Sarah was caught in that crossfire. She was scared that her now slow pace would hurt the pogues in the end. Her new Family. And she knew better than to fight with John B, than to plead with him to keep going without her. He’d never leave her behind. He was noble, he was the man that loved her more than his own life. 

And she’d risk it all for him too. He was the light in her new darkness. Sarah tried to hide it; the trail of blood she now kept behind her. She held the wound to her hip as tightly as she could; until she fell. She fell forward breathing heavily feeling the impact of loss blood. She was trying to move forward in the deep grass; but her feet stopped. She had hoped the male had moved far enough forward to forget; about her. But his voice was like a compass calling her home. And she had to smile to herself as she pulled herself onto his back. Bitting down on her lip knowing she was in pain; that pain in her side, the pool of blood that was now hitting his shirt. Head slowly came to rest on his shoulder; weakness inside of her. “ I know..” She whispered in a weakened tone. She held on for dear life; she had her arms wrapped around his neck, and her legs slid around his waist; a sense of safety; as we neared the spot where the others were. 

The night was dark; no one noticed her pale face; the weaken state she was in. Another phase to the plan? Her eyes trailed over to the smirks of her friends; the explosions that they had in fact thrown in the direction of each guard growing on their tails. A small smirk tugged at her lips. Severs Ward right, to come for family; and you get burned. The others glanced at her; as the elephant in the room was exposed. She was shot; weak; blood pooling out of her as she spoke. “ I’m fine.” She said as she rested her head back down on his shoulder. She vaguely heard JJ make a plan. “ We run into town. There’s abandoned buildings, maybe we find a doctor office on our way.” It wasn’t settle or optimistic in any form; but maybe if we found supplies; I could stitch up my own wound. I had no desire to see a doctor again; nor could we trust any person wouldn’t go running to Ward. So I had barely said a word; leaving the decision up to John B; he was the fighter; the leader in this mess. I’d trust him; I’d follow him anywhere.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I nodded in response to JJ’s suggestion. No offense to my best friend, or anything, but when he came up with plans, they usually crashed and burned. Then again, his idea to break Sarah out wasn’t his worst plan. Mind you, she did get shot as a result of the escape, but I don’t know if I can necessarily blame JJ’s plan for that, or just pin the blame on Ward for being a deranged and psychotic piece of shit] I think heading toward the town is a good idea, but Sarah definitely needs a doctor. Kai, you still have the fake IDs we had made up for all of us, right? [Kai nodded in response while flashing me a confused look] Okay, so if we go to a doctor’s office or hospital, we can use the fake IDs, so Sarah’s identity doesn’t get back to her father. Either way, we need to get the bullet out of Sarah, and get her stitched up. That’s our first priority once we get off of this property. [I explained. Knowing Sarah was getting weaker from the blood loss, so the sooner we got her gunshot wound tended to, the more at ease I would feel that she’s going to be okay. Honestly, at this point in time, my only concern was Sarah. I kept that thought to myself though, because I knew if I startled to unravel with worry, everyone else would begin unraveling too. Bottom line, we weren’t going to make it out of this situation alive if we didn’t remain level headed and make the right decisions]

[ofnotakook]

Right decisions; was it ever in our nature? To be smart, to not lead on impulse? In the short time Sarah spend with John B and the pogues, she’s learned JJ and John B tended to make decisions on a whim. They tended to come up with a plan and without thinking ran with it. Granted it Sarah owed her life to the poges, she owed the idea that she was released from the bars of her own bedroom due to them. And she appreciated the fact given the limbo state the male and myself were tethered into that they risked it all for me. The wrath from my dad; the Camerons’s who I was learning spelled terrible news. Sarah always believed in her dad; the type of man he was. He was kind, he cared about his family wanted to provide for us. But the money the power it gave a person it tended to steamroll you into a horrible person. Sarah couldn’t believe her eyes; the lengths her dad was willing to go, harming his own daughter, embedding Rafe despite his own crimes. She felt disgusted with her own family. The blonde knew where she belonged; where her heart was. Holding onto dear life to the man she currently had her arms wrapped around. 

The blonde let nimble fingers graze over the thin layer of his shirt; the weak grip she held. Her wound was obvious, the blood pooling down her leg. Ward got her damn good. And Sarah hated her fate was on the edge of a line. Doctors wasn’t an option, she knew this island. She knew Ward was probably on a warpath now for blood. Pogues won by letting my escape happen, and now he’d be paying off any source he could, to get his hands on me. 

The female listened despite her own body was fading, head rested upon his head; the comfort of his scent, she was always safe with him. Eyes blinked open and closed, and she slowly let her weaken vision take in the pogue’s who glanced in every direction Smoke of the explosion was all in the air, intoxicating. “ Go South, we get on the boat, and port half way down the island, there’s a hidden office, our best bets is escaping this house.” A thought for food; a hidden doctors office; one that may get me home sailing. 

Without the risk of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised that, in spite of her condition, Sarah was the one to air out the best and most sensible plan. Giving a nod in response as I looked toward JJ and the others] You heard her. Head south. [I said in agreement as I continued carrying Sarah on my back as we all made route south toward the docks. Knowing our risk was still higher than not of getting caught, but she was right… If we had a chance of getting out of here and to freedom, this was the one with the best odds. More than anything though, I just wanted to get her somewhere safe, so she could get some medical attention. I could hear by how weak her voice was that she was losing a lot of blood. The longer this continues, the worse her chances of survival were. Once we reached the docks, we ducked into the shadows until reaching the boat. I made sure to get Sarah on safely, and then I laid her down across one of the seats to rest, while I helped JJ and Pope to untie the ropes; all the while Kai started up the boat. Knowing we’d all need to work together, and to do so quickly, or else we weren’t getting out of here alive] Okay, Kai, we’re clear. Get us the hell out of here. [I called out to her as me and the other guys pushed the boat away from the dock to give it an oomph and then once the boat was cleared from the sides, I returned to Sarah] How bad is it? [I asked as I grabbed the first aid kit stowed under the one seat. Not that I could do much with my incredibly limited experience and knowledge, but I felt helpless by not doing what I could for her now. Besides, if I could at least slow the bleeding, that would give her the best fighting chance to stay alive until we were able to get her medical attention]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt like she had lost everything. She used to be the girl who would always go to the beck and call of her dad; he used to be the incredible man she grew up with. He used to be the man who read bedtime stories to her. He used to give her a glass of milk each time. She had so many fond memories of him. But now; it felt like those memories were tainted. Sarah had always believed in him, she fought the urges to go against him. Seeing his boat explode it destroyed her; she broke up with John B the man she loved for him, because he was glad the man who took his father away got justice. Was dead. And suddenly it felt like our love wasn’t meant to be. 

And now Sarah was bleeding out because of the man who was supposed to protect her. He shot fire at her; at her friends not caring of the consequences. That was the sadness of the reality. That I was alone. I couldn’t turn to my sister, I couldn’t protect. I had to put myself first, and that was the pogues my made family. We lift each other up, we go to bat for each other. And I knew the high stakes. I knew what my father was capable of. I had to wonder how I had any ounce of love for him after what he’s done. Lying to protect Rafe, letting my brother get away with attempting to drown me, he let me get drugged. He’d rather put harm to me than take accountability. And I had to swallow that truth. With a heavy head I felt like my vision was becoming blur as I spurred the last task at hand. Hands loosen on the grip against John B’s shirt, as my eyes drifted shut. How long had we walked? Before I heard the rustling of feet hitting the docks. And I felt my body being dropped gently into the boat, back pressed against a hard backing on the edge. Slowly eyes lifted seeing blurs. 

Figures moving left and right; the “ Ropes done.” I heard from JJ as both boys plopped themselves down on the boat. Pope was at the wheel with Kie, I heard the soft whispers of nothingness. And I heard his voice, the one that always dragged me home. And I wanted to be honest, as my hand slowly nimbly moved against the dam fabric of my sweater as I lifted it up. And I saw it the blood, it was dark, and it explained why I felt faint. Turning my eyes to the man I loved; John B was preparing to bandage up the wound for a short time. “ It doesn’t look pretty, I’ll have a nasty scar if anything.” I aired out attempting to lighten the mood as I felt the boat move as if it was full of lighten. 

This remembered me of when I saved his ass, when we first started out; on our little adventure. A shy grin turned against my lips as I spoke. “ Last time one of us had to bandage the other up, I was sneaking you into the house, I saved your ass, are we finally repaying the favor?” I asked with a sense of teasing in my voice. Definitely not the time, but I needed a laugh a small brief moment for just us.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Although I knew now wasn’t the time for jokes and quips, I still appreciated the fact that Sarah was trying to keep the mood light between us. Maybe if the circumstances had been reversed, I would have been all for cracking jokes… Hell, I would more than likely be cracking them too. Given that Sarah had been shot and was rapidly losing blood though, I definitely wasn’t in a fun and games kind of mindset. For her sake though, I did flash her a grin as I leaned down to press a tender kiss to her forehead] Well, I figured I owed you so it was high time I stepped up and returned the favor. Maybe next time you want me to save you though, let’s go with something that involves less blood shed and need for panic… Deal? [Giving it my best effort to joke in return. In the meantime I grabbed the first aid kit. My hand shaking slightly as I quickly fished around for some bandaging and things I thought I could use to stop the bleeding] Either way, I’m putting you in charge of keeping an eye on me to make sure I’m doing this right. I mean, doctor stuff is new territory for me so I’ll need the supervision. All that to say, eyes open at all times, okay? [My casual way of requesting to Sarah that I wanted her to keep her eyes open. Afraid that if she closed them and fell asleep, I might lose her. A thought that I couldn’t bear to consider as I started to do what I could to apply pressure to her wound and then applied some gauze and then bandaging too, all in an effort to stop the significant bleeding she was currently experiencing]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was well aware of the bleeding that now wasn’t the time for her humor, for her need to crack a joke open. But Sarah could see how scared he was; it was in his eyes. She was scared herself that she was about to take her last breath, by the hands of her own father. Ward had no idea she was assuming that he had aimed for her; she had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. Her own father pulled the trigger; he was aiming a weapon at her friends, at the man she loved. And now she was facing deaths door; she remembered the last time. 

John B was the one aching in pain as she ran her fingers with a cold rag over his blooded wound; which is why the dirty blonde showed amusement. Or she was going nuts with the lack of blood in her system. Eyes had slowed movement as he spoke; and she knew this was his way of saying “ Stop Sarah.” As if she planned on taking a bullet tonight. But her smile soften knowing feeling the panic under his tone, and her slimmed hand; her hand reached to touch his arm as a soothing of reassurance that she was okay. “ I promise next time, I’ll tell my dad not to shoot.” She echoed with that sarcastic retort of hers. But Sarah was done with the jokes. Not that she had the energy. She felt like her body was giving out; she felt the color had now drained from her face in the dark. She barely felt the boat moving against the water; the ocean seas; the seas that used to bring soothing. That used to make her feel safe; and now she was trembling, she felt his hand on her wound; and she had glanced down the blood was soaking her skin, right through his hand. “ Use the guse to wipe around the wound, and then bandage it gently at least until we arrive.” To a doctor; assuming we had the money to get me treated; or this was the end. Her eyes landed back on his features, and she uttered an “ I love you.” As if it was the last words she’d say. 

Eyes kept fluttering open and shut in a daze, despite the promise to stay with him, to guide him through the process; she hardly felt her hand move down to her side; as if her limbs were jelly now. If only this boat would move any faster..

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I appreciated Sarah’s attempt to crack jokes now. That was kinda our thing, you could say, but at the moment, I felt far from laughing. I was worried and growing even more so with every passing second. Sarah was shot. She was bleeding out currently, and I had no way of knowing if we’d get her medical attention in time to save her] Speed up the boat! Let’s go! [I yelled out to Pope and Kie as I saw Sarah’s eyes close. Judging by the worried look on JJ’s face, I knew he was thinking the same thing I was] Hurry the hell up, JJ, and help me pack her wound. Quick, get those gauze pads from the bag! [My voice shaking in building worry as JJ did as I ordered; grabbing me what I needed as I tossed the now soiled and blood soaked gauze pads to the side as I took the clean ones from JJ’s grasp. My hand shaking as I pressed it against Sarah’s gunshot wound. After what felt like a damn eternity, the boat pulled to a stop. I didn’t exactly know where we were at the moment, but at this point Pope and Kie were tying off the boat to the pier, so it wouldn’t go anywhere, and then they rushed toward us] “Come on. I got word that there’s a surgeon in town who handles cases like this for the right price.” [Pope explained which prompted my brows to furrow in confusion] “Get Sarah, let’s go.” [Kie instructed, which prompted me to tape off the currently gauzed padding I had in place, then JJ helped me to lift Sarah carefully out of the boat and onto the pier. Once JJ and I were on the pier, I cradled Sarah securely in my arms] “Here, take this bag. It should be enough to get her treated. Pope and I will stay with the boat.” [Kie said as JJ grabbed the bag and the address of the warehouse doctor, and then we rushed through the dark night air toward the provided address. A less than ideal situation from all angles given Sarah’s condition and the fact that we were in an unfamiliar place looking for the location of a doctor that we knew nothing about. Talk about a wild card move, at its best] Stay with me, Sarah. We’re going to get you help. Keep fighting. [I called out to her as JJ barked out instructions and I merely kept up with his pace as I carried Sarah in my arms toward our destination]

[ofnotakook]

A scar that might kill me. 

It was a thought for Sarah; she felt like she’d been through the ringer. Her own family was willing to sacrifice her for their own benefits. Sarah once thought the world of her father; of the family. But now she knew the truth they only craved the wealth they’d stomp on anyone who dared to stand in their way. Sarah’s own brother tried to drown her, and now her father was the one who pulled the trigger. Obviously he was aiming for John B, but Sarah knew she’d always end up in the cross fire. 

Not that she cared, she’d rather die than live without him. The words she said that night; on the smaller boat, as John B fought for his life, to escape the death sentence. And I meant it; I loved John B and yeah we fought; we ended up screaming at each other. But i’d do anything to be with him, and now as I was fighting for my own life; I only hoped the pogues survived. Sarah was falling unconscious, she had felt her body shutting off. The last words she spoke were of love, an undenying world of love for him. But she felt the blood lost. She felt her wounds becoming fetel. And she heard the urgent, the eagerness in her man’s voice as she felt the vague packing of her wound. How long had it been? 

She had no idea, because she felt darkness overcome her. She felt like she was falling into limo. She barely felt John B and JJ as they wrapped her sim arms around their shoulders and held her up. Enough to look like Sarah was walking, but she was dragged towards the clinic, and she barely heard the exchange when the surgeon called the three up. And with each step, she felt a slight ache in her body. An ache she wanted to subside. But Sarach knew she had to fight; to live, to open her eyes again. She felt her frame fall to a bedding; as her head hung down as the surgeon whispered. “ It’ll be okay, fight.” And She fel the breathing tube come to her nose, she felt the bleeding that was exposed. The doctor mumbled a few words to her friends. “ Do you have the money? She may not live.” He uttered and I felt my body weak. My own shadow breathing as my eyes slowly woke, for a second to see the unfamiliar surroundings, the walls brown. The tubes connected to me, I was scared. But I couldn’t move before my eyes went shut all over again. 

The doctor took the money and he soon took a tool; to save me, if it did any good, because right now I felt like I was on the brink of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

“Yeah, man. Here.” [JJ aired out in response to the shifty doctor’s request for money, before handing him a bag with money in it. My eyes shifted into a roll watching the doctor count it. So much for a moral code to save a life. Apparently all this asshole cared about what money] Just save her. Please. [I aired out pleadingly as I held Sarah’s hand with my one hand; all the while gently stroking back the hair from her face with my free hand. After a moment or so the doctor seemed satisfied with the amount of money JJ gave him inside that bag, and then he began. Watching as he first put Sarah under with what I assumed to be some kind of anesthesia before he grabbed a questionable looking scalpel so he could begin making the first cut. I knew in my gut that trusting this doctor might be the worst idea we’ve ever had, but at the same point, our hands were tied. It was either this option or we’d lose Sarah. Sure, his “she may not live” statement didn’t leave me with much confidence in his skills, but I had to believe in Sarah now. Sarah was strong. She was brave. If anyone could fight this, it was her] Come on, baby. Fight this. Don’t you dare leave me. Fight, baby. Fight. [I gently pleaded in her ear before pressing a tender kiss to her forehead] “Keep watch.” [I heard the doctor instruct of JJ before giving me a knowing sort of look and then a nod] “Here we go.” [The doctor said in less than a confident tone as he made the first cut; taking the scalpel across Sarah’s skin in order to remove the bullet from her body. It was excruciating to watch, but I promised myself that no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her side] “Grab those gauze pads and some gloves. Pour some of that vial with sanitizing solution directly over the incision spot and then place the gauze pads firmly across the area to slow her bleeding. We don’t want her losing more blood than she already has.” [The doctor instructed; forcing me to release Sarah’s hand, so I could assist in the surgery. After what felt like an eternity, he finished; managing to remove the bullet and then to seemingly successfully repair damage to her wounded organ internally. Once he finished, he stitched her up then covered the wound with a significant amount of gauze pads and medical tape] “It’s a wait and see, at this point, so let’s hope she’s a fighter.” [The doctor said while washing his hands in the sink in the corner of the room] She is. [I flatly said in response before removing my gloves and washing my own hands once the doctor had finished. After ensuring my hands were clean, I returned to the table where Sarah rested and I took her hand in my own] You’re a fighter, Sarah. The strongest person I know, so fight this. I’m not going anywhere. [I had no way of knowing if she could hear me, but I didn’t care. On the off chance that she could, I was going to remind her of her strength and ability to fight this now]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt the screams into darkness. She felt like she was on a cloud in limo. She had no control of her body; she felt like she was paralyzed. She didn’t have the power to move, she barely felt her body being held up. She didn’t want to die, she didn’t want to be traped in her own bedroom. She never asked her own father to shoot bullets at her and her friends. Sarah suddenly felt like her once simply life was a cycle of nightmares. Death on our door steps, the rush of running; being on the med. Sarah knew her getting shot was her fault. If she had just listened to John B weeks ago; that Ward didn’t have my best interest at heart. 

If I had stayed with Pogues instead of trusting my now psychic family. One trying to kill me left and right. Sarah had learned her lesson, the only people she could count on was herself, the pogues, even her sister she just hoped her sister was okay. She knew she was stipid to be thinking about anyone but herself now. But she held sympathy for others. The aching in her body was enough to force her to scream in pain if she wasn’t knocked out. She vaguely heard the way her body gently was placed down on a mental table.  I vaguely felt John B his breath in my ear as he tried to reassure me I was okay, I was a fighter. I was in my own little bubble. The darkness in my lids, the way my body was lifeless, especially as the doctor did insert his tool into my body, if I was awake I’d be screaming. I barely felt it; probably from the anesthesia. I couldn’t move, I had no idea how long I was out. I could vaguely hear the voices as the doctor echoed out it would be touch and go. Would I be surviving? Was I still bleeding out? Sarah felt the stirs in her mind as she laid still. Baby, fight.. Words echoed in my ears. 

John B, he needed me, he needed me to be strong, to fight through the blood lost. I couldn’t let him down. I was groggy when I suddenly felt the strength to open my eyes. The small light above me it flashed my eyes forcing me to squit, and I felt John B’s head on my stomach, not on the wounded skin, but right under. I was aching as I let out a soft wine. My hand pale as I lowered my hand onto his dirty brown locks, fingers slowly combed through his hair. “ John B.” I echoed in a whisper; I couldn’t speak and I noticed JJ was sitting in the chair, eyes closed, even JJ stayed. A made family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Hours passed by and there was no change. Sarah was so still and I had no way of knowing if she’d ever wake up. The doctor didn’t sound hopeful. Made a snide remark about her chances of pulled through as he greedily took our money and then ran like hell like some kind of coward. Clearly it was all about money for him. As more time passed, I found my head resting against Sarah’s side. Near her incision but not close enough to cause any further damage. I just wanted and needed to be close to her now. JJ wasn’t far away. He took a look out to make sure Ward nor any of his men were nearby before he’d return to the private room here and take a seat in the chair adjacent from where Sarah and I rested now. I didn’t know how much more time had passed… Felt like an eternity even though I knew it was probably just a few more hours, but eventually I heard the faint sound of her voice, as well as felt her fingers rustle gingerly through my hair. At that my head immediately shot up and I looked at her. Relief flooding my face and expression currently] You’re awake! Thank God! [I uttered out in evident relief as I pressed a gentle kiss to the back of her hand] How are you feeling? The black market doctor left a few things for pain if you need it. [The guy wasn’t exactly reliable but he did seem to save Sarah’s life, so at the moment, I was thinking a bit more favorably of him. Maybe he wasn’t a total money-hungry quack after all. Jury was still out on that one though] Do you want some water? [I asked as I had already picked up a fresh bottle of water; prepared to give her some if she was thirsty]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt weak, she ha no idea as to how long she’d been laying her. The memory of her father; of how easily he had aimed a gun at her, at her friends because of what? Jealousy? Because he wanted to hold this wild control over her? Sarah had once desired to please her family. She had once idolize her father the memory of us at the docks when I was only a little girl it clouded who I knew he was. 

But a few hours before he was so willing to throw me under the bus. He was so willing to let me bleed out on our yard. Because of his hate for the Pogues. I was hurt, I was feeling betrayed but at the same time, relieved as I felt my body come to life. I felt my eyes lift open as I adjusted to the dim light. I saw JJ in the corner as my eyes peeled over to John B who had his head rested against my palm. And I knew I was lucky, he was here. He loved me, and I had to let my fingers run soothingly through his dirty blonde locks. A small smile peeled at my lips. And I knew I couldn’t move. I felt numb to my core as my body was now healing from the blood lost, Sarah wasn’t going to jump up, the fear of Ward on our tail was aching against my own skin. The blonde had peered up at him; the man she loved so much. 

“ I’m okay.” As okay as I was going to be. The wound had been deep, the stitched up wound was felt as my eyes slowly moved to the man I loved. My hand moved to reach for John B. And I felt a sigh of relief escape my own lips. And I felt my gaze linger on him. “ I’m sorry, I’m sorry my dad is a crazy,” My words could never compare to the pain my family has caused him, the pogues and I wanted to do my part to mend those fences. “ Yes.” I echoed to the option of water my throat felt dry but I wasn’t going to jump forward, I slowly lifted my head up to get to a sitting position. My free hand had moved to my side, knowing the pain; the wound my own family caused.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I felt mounds of relief when I heard Sarah’s voice. She was alive. She was awake, and she was speaking. Lifting her hand to my lips as I pressed a couple of kisses to the back of her hand, then gently lowered her hand back down onto the metal table she was lying on] Hey, don’t apologize. It’s not your fault. All that matters is keeping you safe and away from your deranged family. [No matter what, I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t let Ward harm Sarah again. I thought to myself as I brought a fresh bottle of water to Sarah’s lips, so she could drink as much as she wanted and needed. I knew she needed time to rest and heal, but the sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better I could guarantee her safety from her family. One could hope, at least. I mean the way Ward operated, and the fact that he knew people all over the world, I wasn’t sure exactly how far remote we would need to go, and for how long either for that matter, in order to keep Sarah safe, but no matter what, I’d do what it takes. I came close to losing Sarah this time… Too close for comfort, so I wasn’t willing to take any chances with her safety again. At least not until Ward was no longer a threat to her] Once you’re well enough, we’re going to get you out of here. Pope and Kie are keeping an eye on the boat, and when you’re strong enough, we’re all getting on that boat, and getting as far away as possible. We figure with some distance and preferably some place off the grid, eventually your father will stop looking for you. [Maybe wishful thinking since Ward wasn’t one who took well to losing, but one could hope he’d eventually give up and accept that Sarah was gone]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah kept asking herself the obvious how she’d been blind. How she was capable of still holding a torch of love for her family. With all the crimes all the ways her own brother tried to murder her; sending drug mules her way, being the one that nearly drowned her to death. And now her own father; was so mad at the Pogues so terrified of losing his daughter to the pogues; not wanting to lose the fight that he aimed and shot me. The blood that once covered her fingertips, the blood the redness that ran over her sweater, it was an image Sarah couldn’t erase.  

Her friends, her boyfriend? Cut into the crossfires because of her fucked up  family. And even now as she opened her eyes; said a few words, she felt the aching on her wound, damn that stitch is gonna hurt like hell. But it was comforting to feel his touch, to witness his lips touching her knuckles once again. John B, he was her anchor that kept her whole. A soften expression; a smile curled at the corners of her lips as she saviored his touch; his lips against her skin. “  They drugged me, they forced me here. I feel trapped like no one is safe in that house, but my sister..”  A fear for the little Cameron it rocked me whole now, as I felt the lump forming in my throat. Wheezie she was innocent had no idea who’s roof she was living under. Like myself; I’d been blinded from the truth. But now my father was deranged; he passed off onto Rafe; and Rose was clueless as ever a pond in the game; until she crossed Ward. 

A slight cough was heard; as the blonde felt the wetness hit her tongue, one sip of water turned into half the bottle until she released the top from her lips and she slowly sat herself up, her palms hitting the metal of the table to hold herself up. Nuts insane considering her own wounds she wore. But her eyes ran along John B’s features with ease. “ You know he won’t let that happen. He blames you the pogues for his princess no longer being in his care. I’m a game for him to win..” A sad truth, an ached formed in her chest now.  “ I wouldn’t blame you if you allowed the pogues to leave me here for  dust to get away. I don’t want to bring you down, or put you and pogues in danger..” Not again the words hid  at the tips of her tongue. 

Danger; our names, but Ward he’d kill to end the war..I was terrified the lengths he’d go no matter how safe I felt with John B; he’d get hurt because of me. A pill I needed to swallow now.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

Sarah, that would never happen. [I flatly replied with a matter of fact sort of shrug. Sure, I knew if this was just about Sarah, maybe JJ and the others would have high-tailed it out of here. Not necessarily Pope since he had a heart to do the right thing, but Kie was what you could say, hot and cold toward Sarah, so it wouldn't take much for her to bail on Sarah. And well, JJ hated Kooks in general, so he had no loyalties to Sarah either. Thing was though, they all knew I'd literally die to protect Sarah, and the Pogues would always put their lives on the line to protect each other. All that to say, as long as I was staying put at Sarah's side, the Pogues wouldn't be going anywhere either because they'd always have my back, just like I'd always have theirs too. We fought fiercely for each other] Even if the others decided to high-tail it out of here, I'd never leave your side. Unless you tell me to go, I'm not going anywhere... [I started to say before an amused smirk followed] And even then, I can't promise I'd actually leave. You know I'm stubborn when people try to tell me what to do. [I teased even though that was the truth] Either way, once you're well enough, we're all getting the hell out of here, and getting to safety together. Until then, just rest and heal. [I said as I gave her hand another gentle squeeze. My way of reassuring her that we were all in this together; no matter what the outcome]

[ofnotakook]

I can always trust in you

@apogueforlife 

I can always trust in you 

Trust; it had to be earned. Love; it had to be developed. For Sarah she always had her guard up. Each time she’d get close to letting someone in the other shoe would drop, she’d freeze up, and run in the other direction. With each boyfriend she ever had she had the urge to run. To distant herself when she felt like she was trapped. When she felt the pressure to feel more than what she did. Topper he liked the idea of her. He loved the idea of being with her; but he wasn’t in love with her. 

There’s only one boy Sarah loved; and that was John B. It happened unexpectedly. It happened on a day she never saw coming. That day stayed with her. The day we went to chapel hill; the day we had fun dressing each other up. The day we pretended to be our alter egos; Val and Vlad. It was nice to be herself. I didn’t feel the pressure to be perfect. I didn’t feel like my family was watching me, I was myself. I felt safe, I felt like John B saw me despite all the flaws I had. He loved me for me, and I loved him. It was a roller coaster of a relationship if you asked me. We had gone from barely knowing each other; to falling completely utterly in love. I gave up my kook card for him. I knew the obsluces we’d be facing now, the pogue’s vs the kook. But nothing made me question my loyalty to him. To the Pogues. It got messy with my dad; him being the reason Big John was gone. The reason why the gold was taken. The reason I was on the run with John B. The gold felt so close yet so far. We managed to clear John B’s name but that’s because Ward decided in his best interest to fake his own death and act like the hero. The guy that claimed to have been a killer in order to protect his own son. Rafe just the thought of being near him made me sick to my stomach. For a second I was upset, I felt like my whole body ached when I witnessed the boat blow up. When I witnessed my father shatter beyond the sea. And that’s when I saw the truth; what led to us being torn apart; what led to John B and I no longer being together. He had been happy to ward dead; and I couldn’t exactly find the words to blame him. He took everything from him. But at the end of the day; he was my dad. I was hurting and I remembered that look all too well; the look of proudnessI felt like I was seeing another person. I was grieving the dad I once looked up to, to the dad that I was once his princess. I needed John B to hold me, to make me feel like it was always going to be okay. But it suddenly felt like us it wasn’t meant to be.. 

Walking away for yourself; was all you could do. It was hard to be near him; to be pulled back into the adventure; to the cross. But for Pope I’d be there; awkwardness assured. Sarah didn’t know if she should make eye contact with him; or just stay silent. Silence seemed better; until that night; we had a plan to get the cross from Rafe; the big truck was parked outside my house. JJ and Pope were hidden behind the bushes. I was determined to walk inside; to get the key to unlock the truck; how we’d get the heavy cross out was a big ass story of it’s own. But I had made two steps to the gates, one glance backwards; I saw him John B was about to get up; and for a second I found myself hopeful; maybe this was the moment of the unknown. What comes next? Dark hues met for a second and I swore the air was taken out of my lungs; but he didn’t budge, didn’t move. Giving me the indication we had nothing left to say. That was the last memory I had of him; of us staring at each other. 

Head leaned against the gated up windows of my room at the barbados house, The house I was locked into. The boat felt like a nightmare; I was drugged by my own family. Rose had put a drug in my tea. Rafe and had helped her execute the plan; to force me here against my will. I remembered telling Ward when he claimed John B only cared about the treasure about the gold that I was just stuck in the cross hair that he was wrong. That John b would find him and come for him once I went missing. How wrong had I been? I wanted to blink back the tears that dared to fall. I was a pogue at heart; I chose it for John B because I loved him, despite our differences he’d always have a permanent place in my heart. It had been weeks since we left on the boat, I had tried to zone out the conversations of my parents; I had pretended to be sleeping at times, but here once I had been pulled into my room I never left. I guess Ward was afraid I’d run, or threaten to tell the cops his own daughter was kidnapped against her will. Give or take. Sarah swallowed the lump in her throat; it had gotten dark. She smelt the tray of food that her sister left her outside the door. Her bed was an inch away; The light pink covers still in place, it had been a day or two since we arrived, and I had slept in my bed because that meant i was okay, that meant that I was adjusting to being here; in this house. When all I wanted was to break free. At the window, on the seat where my back was pressed against the wall. Head tilted towards the window, I could see the water; any boats that passed by. I was alone; and all I could hope was that the Pogue’s were okay that perhaps my dad was right they managed to get the cross and that’s all that mattered for Pope. Eyes moved to the stars; for a moment it was nice to believe we were looking at the same stars; as if John B was on his way; assuming my dad was lying. For now all I could do was hold hope; I’d find a way out; it was a done deal. 

Tomorrow; I’d work out a plan. The Pogues would have me, if I found him. We’d always have each other. A wistful thought as a hint of a smile tainted onto my lips.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Love. Definitely not something I ever believe really existed. I always saw it more as, in life, people come and go. The ones who matter will stick with you, through thick and thin. For me, that was the Pogues: JJ, Kie, and Pope. I don’t remember a time in my life when those three weren’t part of it, and something tells me, I’ll never shake them either. Not that I’d want to, cause they’re everything to me. Then Sarah Cameron busted into my life unexpectedly… One of those surprising moments where I got myself in a sticky situation, and Sarah Cameron, of all people, was the one who bailed me out of it. Even more surprising though was how I felt when I was with her. It was the first time in my life when I found myself wanting to be with a girl exclusively. In time she even made me rethink my original theory about love. Then, well, I guess you could say life happened, and we broke up. Sure, I knew I played a part in our break up. When her father died, I should have been more supportive of the toll that loss would take on Sarah. Yeah, the guy was bad news… A lying crook, which Sarah obviously knew too, but he was still her father. Given the bad blood I had with Ward, and also the fact that he murdered my father, could you really blame me for being relieved that the guy was finally gone? Right or wrong, it’s how I felt. This leading to the end of Sarah’s and my relationship. Still, in my heart I knew this wasn’t the end for us. A love like ours always finds a way back to one another. Naïve or not, I refused to see it any other way…

Then weeks passed and I was starting to wonder if it really had been the end for us. Mind you, I still wasn’t giving up, but instead of dwelling on what may or may not happen between me and Sarah, instead the Pogues and I focused on getting the cross back for Pope. It actually became a, “Kill two birds with one stone” type of adventure for us though, since word got to me that Sarah had been abducted by her family. Them ultimately boarding a ship with Sarah and the cross, allegedly heading to Barbados; knowing that was exactly where we would be going to. This was it… This was our chance to, not only help Pope get the cross back, but also for me to rescue Sarah too…

Given that us Pogues had made some enemies, and also the fact that we didn’t have so much as a pot to piss in, much less money to travel to Barbados, it took some work, a lot of time, and even more creativity on our parts before we finally reached Barbados. Once we did, I knew we needed to devise a plan to get back both Sarah and the cross. Of course JJ, as usual, came up with one of the worst plans I had ever heard. This saying a lot considering JJ’s had some really shitty plans, over the years. This one pretty much topped the other bad plans he’s had though; prompting all of us to shoot down his plan and come up with another one. Knowing it was either come up with a better plan, or go with JJ’s plan which will likely either get us all killed, or at the very least, we’ll end up locked up in some jail cell. In time we did come up with a new plan. Not a great one, but definitely better than JJ’s plan, so it was something, at least. For our part we decided one step at a time…

We’d wait till night, rescue Sarah first, and then once we had her safely out of that house and away from her deranged family, we’d devise a plan to get the cross back. I mean, it’s not like we could just knock on the front door, and request either. Not without being shot, that is. We couldn’t even break in and steal the cross without getting caught, since it was so damn heavy, it was going to take a hell of a lot of brute strength to carry it, so we’d just deal with that plan later. For now, my focus was on Sarah. Sure, I knew there was a chance I’d be the last person she’d want to see tonight, but given me and the Pogue’s rescuing her, or her remaining a hostage with her own family, I figured I was the lesser of the evils, so to speak. I justified as Kie and Pope remained look outs from the ground; keeping hidden to the garden area where they tried to remain unseen, while JJ and I went to the roof. With JJ’s help, he hoisted me down onto the balcony I had scoped out and learned led to the bedroom they were keeping Sarah locked in. Once I approached the balcony window, I peaked inside discreetly; making sure her family was nowhere in sight before I gave a couple of light taps on the window. My way of alerting Sarah that I was here. Of course the window was pad-locked, which just pissed me off more. How could they do this to Sarah? The Cameron’s definition of family was nothing more than a load of bullshit, if you ask me, because this isn’t how you treat family. I thought in building anger as I used the pin I had with me to trigger the lock. Once I heard it click, my eyes shifted up toward JJ. The thumbs up he gave me in reply assuring me he had cut the security system like he confidently told me he could easily handle. This was JJ, so although I’d trust him with my life, and well, I had a few times, I still held my breath as I slowly and gingerly opened the window; expelling a quiet sigh of relief when an alarm didn’t sound as I opened the window] Val…? [I quietly whispered her code name into the dark bedroom. Hoping it would soften any resentment she might have in seeing me here now] Vlad and the crew are here to spring you from here… [I further whispered into the dark bedroom as I waited for her to come over to the window; knowing we didn’t have long before someone would alert the Cameron’s that the security system had been hacked into, so the sooner we got out of there, the better our chances of getting out of here alive]

[ofnotakook]

The pogue plans never went according to plan. Not that Sarah was going to complain now considering. She was able to escape the bars that locked her into her old bedroom. She was tired of starving herself out of spite. She was tired of laying awake at night in fear that she might be dragged out of bed. She was tired of being forced to live the perfect life. Forced to smile for her parents; the only one in her family she liked was her sister Wheezie, she’s who I wanted to protect. But she had young opinions, didn’t see what our family was capable of. And given how much risk John B went through to find me, I had to go with him. Not that I wanted to stay trapped or that I’d risk his life to save my sister. 

I felt torn with myself now. I escaped; I was on the roof; I had survived the lies, I had survived my own father aiming a gun at me; of course to his unknown knowledge Ward did exceed in his aiming and catching fire on one of us. I doubted his attention was to hurt me. Yet again it felt like a toss up considering, he did try to strangle me to death; and drugged me to get onto that stupid boat. But I knew him to know the problem wasn’t my stubbornness, it was John B and the pogues. He was threatened, and right now the Camerons wasn’t my family; it was the pogues. I had chose them a long time ago weather I wanted to admit it or not. 

Safe; is what I felt; despite the pain that was pooling on my side; the white sweater was making it difficult to hide. But I felt his kiss; the graze of his lips on my head, a tenderness of who we were. A love language for us. Seeing as JJ had followed my lead; and started down the ladder; I had stepped forward turning my back to where my hues fell on the male I loved with all my heart. Despite our differences that did come to light when I uttered the words maybe we weren’t meant to be, to work out. 

A soulfulness in my stare as I uttered my words. “ Promise you’ll come down.” I mouthed the words “ I can’t lose you.” As my palm wasn’t already filled with my own blood. Taking my hand from side, I placed them firmly on the handles of the ladder, with one step and than the next. I caught sight of the droplets of blood hitting the ladder as I climbed down, It wasn’t until I reached the bottom, I felt JJ; place his hand on my hip in order to help me off when he wore this stunned expression. “ Sarah.” He mouthed, I knew he felt it; the blood that now covered his hand; I shook my head. “ Don’t say a word.” I had strength I’d be okay until I couldn’t walk anymore; He was about to say something when I hit him in the chest. 

John B would be in earshot; I couldn’t tell him yet; once we were in the clear I’d tell him, but I didn’t want him to worry about me, not after all the risks he took to save me. Pushing myself to the side, I eyed the small area where our feet hit the grass; Kie and Pope had to make it to the gates; where it led to the waterfront it was our get away. Our only glimmer of hope.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I promise. I’ll be right behind you. [I assured Sarah as I watched JJ go down the ladder first, to ensure it was safe for Sarah to follow. Once JJ gave the “all clear” signal, I gave Sarah and nod to begin descending the ladder] You’ll be okay. JJ will meet you at the bottom, and I won’t be far behind. [I reminded her as she started to descend the ladder. I ducked down lower to the roof as I heard the sound of more gunshots looming in the air. Once Sarah was about halfway down the ladder, I started to position myself onto the ladder; getting a good grip on the sides before I slowly began descending the ladder too. It wasn’t long before I could faintly hear Sarah and JJ safely at the bottom on the ground below the ladder, and I was following them moments later. After I reached the bottom, I noticed the concerned look JJ was giving me, but assuming it had something to do with the fact that we were all still in danger on the Cameron’s grounds, I didn’t question JJ on his strange look. Instead, I snaked my arm gently and protectively around Sarah’s shoulder; gently tugging her closer to me before speaking up in a hushed volume] Okay, we made it this far, which is great, but we’re not out of danger yet. Let’s get to Pope and Kie, and then all of us get the hell out of here. [I suggested before nodding my head toward JJ; gesturing for him to lead the way. The sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better our chances would be of us surviving this]

[ofnotakook]

He’d be right behind me. It was a sense of comfort knowing I wasn’t alone.That I was nearly to safety but the question lingered of how long. Because I felt the bleeding on my hip, I felt the lost of blood that peeled from my skin. Not that Sarah was about to utter a word. If she did their plan of escaping would be jeopardized. And JJ and John B had risked it all for her. Kie and Pope were on the lower ground taking cover on her behalf. Sarah wasn’t selfish; she knew when to take one for the team. Her dad; his shots that were fired. It was venages for her; for the Pogues brainwashing her; but the truth was Sarah saw beneath the scars. She saw the truth. The perfect knit family wasn’t real. She had hoped her father would be okay; that he would let her go. Let the pogues go give John B what was rightfully his. 

But instead he saw me as property. I wasn’t a person to him. I was his daughter yes; but I also was my own mind and heard. All that to say I tried not to shake when I heard the gunshots in the distance. I had my hands holding onto the ladder as JJ slowly helped me down. Blood it was obvious at the edge of the ladder; I easily shook my head to JJ; indicating John B didn’t need to know. I was fine. I Swore I caught an edge of concern against his expression. Did JJ care? I asked myself as feet hit the pavement; the edge of the roof as we lowered ourselves down to the ground. His arm was comfort; he was there with me every step of the way. 

Reaching up with my cleared hand; I intertwined my palm with his own. Above my shoulder as I forced a smile. “ almost there.” I whispered as i felt the throbbing on my side; the dripping of redness down my leg; I just hoped it was dark enough to hide. Enough to give us a clear out before I had to say the words. I was shot; a haunting thought as I saw Kie and Pope in sight. 

“ Once we step down one last step, run to the gates, there’s a boat waiting okay. I’ll get the keys.” I told myself it was a solid plan; despite my obvious discomfort to myself. I leaned up to press a kiss to John B’s hand lips against his thumb before I gave the nod to Kie and Pope. 

It was time to run; it was our only chance; even if it meant the Pogues leaving without me; I could handle my injury and my dad; but John B needed an escape or his life was at risk; and right now I cared less about me and more about his safety. “ Run.” Whispered as hands released his own as my body heavily dropped to the ground. Shots being fired; I leaned down enough to swat; to hide under until the walkway cleared.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I gave a nod of relief to Sarah and JJ once our feet finally hit the pavement below. Sure, I knew we still had a challenge ahead of us, even more of one now that Ward knew I had taken Sarah, so I guarantee he wasn’t the only one firing a gun currently. Now we had him, and his whole damn security department firing at us, too. Regardless, we made it this far, which to some, seemed like an impossible feat in and of itself, but we’re still alive, so that’s something. I justified optimistically as Sarah told us the next part of the plan. Good thing we managed to get her out, because JJ nor I had come up with an escape plan. In normal pogue fashion, we planned to wing it once we reached the point… You know, assuming that we made it this far, I should say] Okay, babe. [I said as I heard her instruct us to “run,” and then she released my hand. Given how close I had already come to losing her, I wasn’t about to let her out of my sight; especially in a dangerous situation like this. With that protective thought in mind, I hadn’t run far before realizing she was no longer at my side, or even behind me] Sarah? Sarah, where are you? [I asked in a hushed volume as I started to back track to find her. It didn’t take me long before I nearly tripped over her as she laid down onto the ground] What are you doing? Are you okay? [Assuming maybe she tripped and hurt herself or something, which is why she didn’t get up and continue running with us. Either way, I waited for the latest bout of gun shots to fade out before I helped Sarah up from the ground. This time snaking my arm around her to keep her close as we prepared to catch up with the others] Can you walk? [Prepared to carry her on my back if she was hurt and couldn’t run. Whatever it took to get Sarah safely out of here, I was all for doing it. Sarah’s safety and freedom was my top priority right now]

[ofnotakook]

A getaway plan; honestly Sarah could easily say she had the grounds of the priority mapped out in her head. But the times she’s visited this house she could count on her hand. It was slim; but right now she had to save herself or she risked the chance of Ward getting his hooks not just in her; but it put the pogues in danger. The same people who risked their lives in order to save her. Sarah didn’t take it for granted; she knew she was a mess. She was someone who was torn between love and her family. But she was locked in her own room on more than one occasion. Her father proved he only cared about the gold. It stung; it made Sarah feel like shit; like she wasn’t enough for her own father. 

But now wasn’t the time; the end was near. She felt her knees wobbly, she felt the lost of blood elevate against her frame. Feet planted against the pavement; her eyes scanned the grounds until they reached Kie and Poper who had keys in their hands; they found the keys to the boat under one of my rocks. It was kinda my getaway car back in the day when I wanted to be reckless; I wanted an escape; apparently it was my younger self telling me to be prepared. Because right now our best bet was to run. Run through the pavements; the mountains of trees to get to the edge. I whispered the words. JJ didn’t need any admission; he ran like hell while guns were being fired. Fired at us; which is why I ducked. Not voluntarily; I had fallen to my knees. I had fell right to the ground. I felt my lungs closing off; I felt the air in my body slowly leaving, as I felt my frame hit the ground in a huff. 

I knew John B; he’d never leave without me. I was kinda surprised he hadn’t picked up on the trail of blood I left on the roof; the ladder in my wake. But to my surprise my secret was that a secret. Eyes closed growing heavy that was until I felt his hands roll onto my own palms. Fingers curled around his hands as I slowly pushed myself back onto my feet. “ I’m okay.” A fat lie I screamed at myself. The dirty blonde moved in the threes; in the brushes; her sneakers ran across the lawn until she heard her feet against the pavement. “ John B.. If I fall behind I need you to run like hell okay.” A demand not an ask. The female whispered in a low tone as fingers tighten around his palm. “ I was shot..’ The words stuck on her tongue as she paused; glancing down to her hip; her hip where there was a big ass stain of redness under her sweater; the white sweater now red; she bit down on her lip in fear; and now she’d be the reason they got caught; from running for their lives. 

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what, I would never leave Sarah behind. She was everything to me. Including my favorite pain in the ass that I argued with like we were already a married couple. Point is, I loved Sarah more than life itself, and even though things were a bit up in the open currently between us, that didn’t matter, because I would always come for her. Case and point when I saw her drop down and without a second thought or hesitation, I went back for her and then waited until she was ready to move before we continued our escape. My face turned pale though as I could feel the blood leaving my cheeks when I heard her confession about being shot] What? You were shot? [Quietly repeating the words back to myself, as if trying to process it, but also hoping that I had heard her wrong and she’d correct me now. Judging by the blood I saw that had stained her shirt, I knew I hadn’t imagined it. My worst nightmare was happening now in the fact that Sarah was hurt] It’s going to be okay. I’ll get you out of here and then we’ll get you help. [I assured her. No way in hell of knowing if she was going to be okay or not. I mean, she was shot. With a bullet. She was bleeding, and I had no way of knowing how much blood she’s lost already, because I was just now hearing she was hurt] Let’s get you on my back, and I’ll carry you out of here. [My way of letting her know that, no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her behind, so this way, if we get caught, we’re going to do so together. I silently justified as I squatted down as low as I could, so Sarah didn’t have to strain too much to shift onto my back]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s family was the why the Pogue’s were in this mess. The why we were fighting for our life’s. Namely the finger needed to be pointed towards my father. The man who wanted to be a proud family man, adoring father was willing to aim guns at his own daughter. He chose a hell of a long time ago. I wasn’t the kook anymore; I was a pogue; the family I decided I wanted. My pure love and adoration for John B. He was my everything. The boy I wanted to bicker with day and night. The boy I wanted to run on adventures with. He understood me, I never felt alone with him; I never felt like I had to pretend. I always felt trapped, the need to run from how I felt those strong feelings until I met him. Until we kissed; and fell insanely in love. 

And this island; the gold being unreachable now; was on me. I was the one who believed in my dad; kept opening my mouth and claiming he loves me, he’d never hurt me. I was the fool a disgrace not only had my brother tried to kill me drown me, my own dad wanted me dead. I had nothing but John B and the pogue’s. They were all I needed. 

Each leg of movement was starting to cause a strain on my body. I had no issues running; it was the open wound on my abdomen that was preventing me from moving fast enough. Knees weak, I could barely keep up. I heard the others in a distant reach the boat; the boat that was gassed up; the keys I knew where they were hidden the backup keys I mean. I remembered going out on this boat as a child; for our family trips on the ocean. What an embarrassing moment now considering. Leaning over my frame; eyes staring at the grass that touched my ankles. Head moving to stare between my legs in order to catch my panting breaths. I felt weak, I said the words. And I swore I heard John B stop; he paused in disbelief but the writing was pooling down my legs; the droplets of blood obvious. Tilting my head up I bit down on my lower lip to hold in the whine the pain of my wound. “ John B..” Name lingered on my tongue as tried to find the how I’d get this boy to leave without me. Instead he decided to bend down to the ground. I hesitated, I didn’t want to hold him back. “ I..” I started but I also know this boy; he’d risk it all for me. It didn’t make sense for both of us to risk being caught here, but with last minute thinking I pulled myself onto his back. Arms wrapped loosely around his neck. Legs wrapping around his waist, once I was safely on his back I rested my head on his shoulder. “ You can move now..” I echoed in a nearly teasing retort. Keep it light; until we escaped. 

A death trap of my own making.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what happened, I would never leave Sarah behind. I wasn’t stupid. I knew us breaking into her family’s compound tonight to break her out was a death trap. It was a fool’s errand, but I didn’t care. Sarah was in danger. She might not see how deranged her father and brother are, but I knew. I saw first-hand what her psychotic father was capable of, so I wouldn’t put anything past him now. Including him hurting his own daughter just to ensure he kept her far away from me. The man was a damn lunatic and the sooner I got Sarah away from him, the better off she’d be. The driving reason I broke into her room tonight. Well, “prison” was probably a more fitting word given the bars her father had put on her windows, so she could be kept there as his prisoner. Asshole. I thought in disdain as we ran toward some semblance of safety. I stopped though when I realized Sarah was no longer behind me. Panic setting in since it was dark, which made it difficult to see. Following the sounds of her breaths and rustling through the grass as I back-tracked back toward her. Shock and fear washing over me in hearing she had been shot. A part of me wondering if taking her back to her father was the best course of action, since his ties and pull could have a doctor here in moments. Still, something told me she wouldn’t want to go back there. She’d choose to take the risk to keep moving] I’ve got you. Don’t worry. I’d never leave without you, Sarah. [I assuredly whispered out as I helped her get situated safely on my back; ensuring her arms were wrapped tightly around my neck and her legs secured around my waist before I started through the trees and such in search of JJ and the others] “John B? Where the hell are you?” [I heard the familiar sound of JJ’s voice airing out nearby in a hushed tone. Moving in the direction of his voice, I eventually caught up with them. Keeping Sarah securely on my back as we reached them] “Ready for the next part of the plan? The diversion?” [JJ asked with pride in his voice, which prompted a skeptical look from me. All of us knowing JJ wasn’t the best at plans, but I did feel better when Pope and Kie chimed in to share that they had actually helped with this part of the plan] If it gets us out of here, then hell yeah, do it! [I muttered out as I watched JJ throw a lit flare in the direction of the wooded area we had all just escaped from, before throwing two others in separate directions of the same wooded area. Listening and watching as I saw a small explosion go off, followed by another, and then countless more. Pope and Kie explaining they rigged those while they were waiting for us to break Sarah out. Chuckling in pride and feeling a momentary sense of victory as I realized we temporarily stopped Ward’s guards from catching up; prompting us to continue running the remaining way off of the compounds and then into the city. Now it was just a matter of finding a place to hide out and to get Sarah medical attention] Sarah was shot, so we need to get her to a doctor before we do anything else. [I explained to the others; watching the wheels practically turning in their head on how to work this one out without all of us ending up getting caught]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s greatest fear was her friends, was the boy she loved getting hurt on her behalf. She always believed in the good in her father; that he had made mistakes. But when it came to their family he always held their best interest at heart. But all the evidence was staked against him. He faked his own death; he was okay with putting his arms around my neck. He was okay with shooting a bullet not knowing where it land. And Sarah was caught in that crossfire. She was scared that her now slow pace would hurt the pogues in the end. Her new Family. And she knew better than to fight with John B, than to plead with him to keep going without her. He’d never leave her behind. He was noble, he was the man that loved her more than his own life. 

And she’d risk it all for him too. He was the light in her new darkness. Sarah tried to hide it; the trail of blood she now kept behind her. She held the wound to her hip as tightly as she could; until she fell. She fell forward breathing heavily feeling the impact of loss blood. She was trying to move forward in the deep grass; but her feet stopped. She had hoped the male had moved far enough forward to forget; about her. But his voice was like a compass calling her home. And she had to smile to herself as she pulled herself onto his back. Bitting down on her lip knowing she was in pain; that pain in her side, the pool of blood that was now hitting his shirt. Head slowly came to rest on his shoulder; weakness inside of her. “ I know..” She whispered in a weakened tone. She held on for dear life; she had her arms wrapped around his neck, and her legs slid around his waist; a sense of safety; as we neared the spot where the others were. 

The night was dark; no one noticed her pale face; the weaken state she was in. Another phase to the plan? Her eyes trailed over to the smirks of her friends; the explosions that they had in fact thrown in the direction of each guard growing on their tails. A small smirk tugged at her lips. Severs Ward right, to come for family; and you get burned. The others glanced at her; as the elephant in the room was exposed. She was shot; weak; blood pooling out of her as she spoke. “ I’m fine.” She said as she rested her head back down on his shoulder. She vaguely heard JJ make a plan. “ We run into town. There’s abandoned buildings, maybe we find a doctor office on our way.” It wasn’t settle or optimistic in any form; but maybe if we found supplies; I could stitch up my own wound. I had no desire to see a doctor again; nor could we trust any person wouldn’t go running to Ward. So I had barely said a word; leaving the decision up to John B; he was the fighter; the leader in this mess. I’d trust him; I’d follow him anywhere.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I nodded in response to JJ’s suggestion. No offense to my best friend, or anything, but when he came up with plans, they usually crashed and burned. Then again, his idea to break Sarah out wasn’t his worst plan. Mind you, she did get shot as a result of the escape, but I don’t know if I can necessarily blame JJ’s plan for that, or just pin the blame on Ward for being a deranged and psychotic piece of shit] I think heading toward the town is a good idea, but Sarah definitely needs a doctor. Kai, you still have the fake IDs we had made up for all of us, right? [Kai nodded in response while flashing me a confused look] Okay, so if we go to a doctor’s office or hospital, we can use the fake IDs, so Sarah’s identity doesn’t get back to her father. Either way, we need to get the bullet out of Sarah, and get her stitched up. That’s our first priority once we get off of this property. [I explained. Knowing Sarah was getting weaker from the blood loss, so the sooner we got her gunshot wound tended to, the more at ease I would feel that she’s going to be okay. Honestly, at this point in time, my only concern was Sarah. I kept that thought to myself though, because I knew if I startled to unravel with worry, everyone else would begin unraveling too. Bottom line, we weren’t going to make it out of this situation alive if we didn’t remain level headed and make the right decisions]

[ofnotakook]

Right decisions; was it ever in our nature? To be smart, to not lead on impulse? In the short time Sarah spend with John B and the pogues, she’s learned JJ and John B tended to make decisions on a whim. They tended to come up with a plan and without thinking ran with it. Granted it Sarah owed her life to the poges, she owed the idea that she was released from the bars of her own bedroom due to them. And she appreciated the fact given the limbo state the male and myself were tethered into that they risked it all for me. The wrath from my dad; the Camerons’s who I was learning spelled terrible news. Sarah always believed in her dad; the type of man he was. He was kind, he cared about his family wanted to provide for us. But the money the power it gave a person it tended to steamroll you into a horrible person. Sarah couldn’t believe her eyes; the lengths her dad was willing to go, harming his own daughter, embedding Rafe despite his own crimes. She felt disgusted with her own family. The blonde knew where she belonged; where her heart was. Holding onto dear life to the man she currently had her arms wrapped around. 

The blonde let nimble fingers graze over the thin layer of his shirt; the weak grip she held. Her wound was obvious, the blood pooling down her leg. Ward got her damn good. And Sarah hated her fate was on the edge of a line. Doctors wasn’t an option, she knew this island. She knew Ward was probably on a warpath now for blood. Pogues won by letting my escape happen, and now he’d be paying off any source he could, to get his hands on me. 

The female listened despite her own body was fading, head rested upon his head; the comfort of his scent, she was always safe with him. Eyes blinked open and closed, and she slowly let her weaken vision take in the pogue’s who glanced in every direction Smoke of the explosion was all in the air, intoxicating. “ Go South, we get on the boat, and port half way down the island, there’s a hidden office, our best bets is escaping this house.” A thought for food; a hidden doctors office; one that may get me home sailing. 

Without the risk of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised that, in spite of her condition, Sarah was the one to air out the best and most sensible plan. Giving a nod in response as I looked toward JJ and the others] You heard her. Head south. [I said in agreement as I continued carrying Sarah on my back as we all made route south toward the docks. Knowing our risk was still higher than not of getting caught, but she was right… If we had a chance of getting out of here and to freedom, this was the one with the best odds. More than anything though, I just wanted to get her somewhere safe, so she could get some medical attention. I could hear by how weak her voice was that she was losing a lot of blood. The longer this continues, the worse her chances of survival were. Once we reached the docks, we ducked into the shadows until reaching the boat. I made sure to get Sarah on safely, and then I laid her down across one of the seats to rest, while I helped JJ and Pope to untie the ropes; all the while Kai started up the boat. Knowing we’d all need to work together, and to do so quickly, or else we weren’t getting out of here alive] Okay, Kai, we’re clear. Get us the hell out of here. [I called out to her as me and the other guys pushed the boat away from the dock to give it an oomph and then once the boat was cleared from the sides, I returned to Sarah] How bad is it? [I asked as I grabbed the first aid kit stowed under the one seat. Not that I could do much with my incredibly limited experience and knowledge, but I felt helpless by not doing what I could for her now. Besides, if I could at least slow the bleeding, that would give her the best fighting chance to stay alive until we were able to get her medical attention]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt like she had lost everything. She used to be the girl who would always go to the beck and call of her dad; he used to be the incredible man she grew up with. He used to be the man who read bedtime stories to her. He used to give her a glass of milk each time. She had so many fond memories of him. But now; it felt like those memories were tainted. Sarah had always believed in him, she fought the urges to go against him. Seeing his boat explode it destroyed her; she broke up with John B the man she loved for him, because he was glad the man who took his father away got justice. Was dead. And suddenly it felt like our love wasn’t meant to be. 

And now Sarah was bleeding out because of the man who was supposed to protect her. He shot fire at her; at her friends not caring of the consequences. That was the sadness of the reality. That I was alone. I couldn’t turn to my sister, I couldn’t protect. I had to put myself first, and that was the pogues my made family. We lift each other up, we go to bat for each other. And I knew the high stakes. I knew what my father was capable of. I had to wonder how I had any ounce of love for him after what he’s done. Lying to protect Rafe, letting my brother get away with attempting to drown me, he let me get drugged. He’d rather put harm to me than take accountability. And I had to swallow that truth. With a heavy head I felt like my vision was becoming blur as I spurred the last task at hand. Hands loosen on the grip against John B’s shirt, as my eyes drifted shut. How long had we walked? Before I heard the rustling of feet hitting the docks. And I felt my body being dropped gently into the boat, back pressed against a hard backing on the edge. Slowly eyes lifted seeing blurs. 

Figures moving left and right; the “ Ropes done.” I heard from JJ as both boys plopped themselves down on the boat. Pope was at the wheel with Kie, I heard the soft whispers of nothingness. And I heard his voice, the one that always dragged me home. And I wanted to be honest, as my hand slowly nimbly moved against the dam fabric of my sweater as I lifted it up. And I saw it the blood, it was dark, and it explained why I felt faint. Turning my eyes to the man I loved; John B was preparing to bandage up the wound for a short time. “ It doesn’t look pretty, I’ll have a nasty scar if anything.” I aired out attempting to lighten the mood as I felt the boat move as if it was full of lighten. 

This remembered me of when I saved his ass, when we first started out; on our little adventure. A shy grin turned against my lips as I spoke. “ Last time one of us had to bandage the other up, I was sneaking you into the house, I saved your ass, are we finally repaying the favor?” I asked with a sense of teasing in my voice. Definitely not the time, but I needed a laugh a small brief moment for just us.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Although I knew now wasn’t the time for jokes and quips, I still appreciated the fact that Sarah was trying to keep the mood light between us. Maybe if the circumstances had been reversed, I would have been all for cracking jokes… Hell, I would more than likely be cracking them too. Given that Sarah had been shot and was rapidly losing blood though, I definitely wasn’t in a fun and games kind of mindset. For her sake though, I did flash her a grin as I leaned down to press a tender kiss to her forehead] Well, I figured I owed you so it was high time I stepped up and returned the favor. Maybe next time you want me to save you though, let’s go with something that involves less blood shed and need for panic… Deal? [Giving it my best effort to joke in return. In the meantime I grabbed the first aid kit. My hand shaking slightly as I quickly fished around for some bandaging and things I thought I could use to stop the bleeding] Either way, I’m putting you in charge of keeping an eye on me to make sure I’m doing this right. I mean, doctor stuff is new territory for me so I’ll need the supervision. All that to say, eyes open at all times, okay? [My casual way of requesting to Sarah that I wanted her to keep her eyes open. Afraid that if she closed them and fell asleep, I might lose her. A thought that I couldn’t bear to consider as I started to do what I could to apply pressure to her wound and then applied some gauze and then bandaging too, all in an effort to stop the significant bleeding she was currently experiencing]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was well aware of the bleeding that now wasn’t the time for her humor, for her need to crack a joke open. But Sarah could see how scared he was; it was in his eyes. She was scared herself that she was about to take her last breath, by the hands of her own father. Ward had no idea she was assuming that he had aimed for her; she had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. Her own father pulled the trigger; he was aiming a weapon at her friends, at the man she loved. And now she was facing deaths door; she remembered the last time. 

John B was the one aching in pain as she ran her fingers with a cold rag over his blooded wound; which is why the dirty blonde showed amusement. Or she was going nuts with the lack of blood in her system. Eyes had slowed movement as he spoke; and she knew this was his way of saying “ Stop Sarah.” As if she planned on taking a bullet tonight. But her smile soften knowing feeling the panic under his tone, and her slimmed hand; her hand reached to touch his arm as a soothing of reassurance that she was okay. “ I promise next time, I’ll tell my dad not to shoot.” She echoed with that sarcastic retort of hers. But Sarah was done with the jokes. Not that she had the energy. She felt like her body was giving out; she felt the color had now drained from her face in the dark. She barely felt the boat moving against the water; the ocean seas; the seas that used to bring soothing. That used to make her feel safe; and now she was trembling, she felt his hand on her wound; and she had glanced down the blood was soaking her skin, right through his hand. “ Use the guse to wipe around the wound, and then bandage it gently at least until we arrive.” To a doctor; assuming we had the money to get me treated; or this was the end. Her eyes landed back on his features, and she uttered an “ I love you.” As if it was the last words she’d say. 

Eyes kept fluttering open and shut in a daze, despite the promise to stay with him, to guide him through the process; she hardly felt her hand move down to her side; as if her limbs were jelly now. If only this boat would move any faster..

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I appreciated Sarah’s attempt to crack jokes now. That was kinda our thing, you could say, but at the moment, I felt far from laughing. I was worried and growing even more so with every passing second. Sarah was shot. She was bleeding out currently, and I had no way of knowing if we’d get her medical attention in time to save her] Speed up the boat! Let’s go! [I yelled out to Pope and Kie as I saw Sarah’s eyes close. Judging by the worried look on JJ’s face, I knew he was thinking the same thing I was] Hurry the hell up, JJ, and help me pack her wound. Quick, get those gauze pads from the bag! [My voice shaking in building worry as JJ did as I ordered; grabbing me what I needed as I tossed the now soiled and blood soaked gauze pads to the side as I took the clean ones from JJ’s grasp. My hand shaking as I pressed it against Sarah’s gunshot wound. After what felt like a damn eternity, the boat pulled to a stop. I didn’t exactly know where we were at the moment, but at this point Pope and Kie were tying off the boat to the pier, so it wouldn’t go anywhere, and then they rushed toward us] “Come on. I got word that there’s a surgeon in town who handles cases like this for the right price.” [Pope explained which prompted my brows to furrow in confusion] “Get Sarah, let’s go.” [Kie instructed, which prompted me to tape off the currently gauzed padding I had in place, then JJ helped me to lift Sarah carefully out of the boat and onto the pier. Once JJ and I were on the pier, I cradled Sarah securely in my arms] “Here, take this bag. It should be enough to get her treated. Pope and I will stay with the boat.” [Kie said as JJ grabbed the bag and the address of the warehouse doctor, and then we rushed through the dark night air toward the provided address. A less than ideal situation from all angles given Sarah’s condition and the fact that we were in an unfamiliar place looking for the location of a doctor that we knew nothing about. Talk about a wild card move, at its best] Stay with me, Sarah. We’re going to get you help. Keep fighting. [I called out to her as JJ barked out instructions and I merely kept up with his pace as I carried Sarah in my arms toward our destination]

[ofnotakook]

A scar that might kill me. 

It was a thought for Sarah; she felt like she’d been through the ringer. Her own family was willing to sacrifice her for their own benefits. Sarah once thought the world of her father; of the family. But now she knew the truth they only craved the wealth they’d stomp on anyone who dared to stand in their way. Sarah’s own brother tried to drown her, and now her father was the one who pulled the trigger. Obviously he was aiming for John B, but Sarah knew she’d always end up in the cross fire. 

Not that she cared, she’d rather die than live without him. The words she said that night; on the smaller boat, as John B fought for his life, to escape the death sentence. And I meant it; I loved John B and yeah we fought; we ended up screaming at each other. But i’d do anything to be with him, and now as I was fighting for my own life; I only hoped the pogues survived. Sarah was falling unconscious, she had felt her body shutting off. The last words she spoke were of love, an undenying world of love for him. But she felt the blood lost. She felt her wounds becoming fetel. And she heard the urgent, the eagerness in her man’s voice as she felt the vague packing of her wound. How long had it been? 

She had no idea, because she felt darkness overcome her. She felt like she was falling into limo. She barely felt John B and JJ as they wrapped her sim arms around their shoulders and held her up. Enough to look like Sarah was walking, but she was dragged towards the clinic, and she barely heard the exchange when the surgeon called the three up. And with each step, she felt a slight ache in her body. An ache she wanted to subside. But Sarach knew she had to fight; to live, to open her eyes again. She felt her frame fall to a bedding; as her head hung down as the surgeon whispered. “ It’ll be okay, fight.” And She fel the breathing tube come to her nose, she felt the bleeding that was exposed. The doctor mumbled a few words to her friends. “ Do you have the money? She may not live.” He uttered and I felt my body weak. My own shadow breathing as my eyes slowly woke, for a second to see the unfamiliar surroundings, the walls brown. The tubes connected to me, I was scared. But I couldn’t move before my eyes went shut all over again. 

The doctor took the money and he soon took a tool; to save me, if it did any good, because right now I felt like I was on the brink of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

“Yeah, man. Here.” [JJ aired out in response to the shifty doctor’s request for money, before handing him a bag with money in it. My eyes shifted into a roll watching the doctor count it. So much for a moral code to save a life. Apparently all this asshole cared about what money] Just save her. Please. [I aired out pleadingly as I held Sarah’s hand with my one hand; all the while gently stroking back the hair from her face with my free hand. After a moment or so the doctor seemed satisfied with the amount of money JJ gave him inside that bag, and then he began. Watching as he first put Sarah under with what I assumed to be some kind of anesthesia before he grabbed a questionable looking scalpel so he could begin making the first cut. I knew in my gut that trusting this doctor might be the worst idea we’ve ever had, but at the same point, our hands were tied. It was either this option or we’d lose Sarah. Sure, his “she may not live” statement didn’t leave me with much confidence in his skills, but I had to believe in Sarah now. Sarah was strong. She was brave. If anyone could fight this, it was her] Come on, baby. Fight this. Don’t you dare leave me. Fight, baby. Fight. [I gently pleaded in her ear before pressing a tender kiss to her forehead] “Keep watch.” [I heard the doctor instruct of JJ before giving me a knowing sort of look and then a nod] “Here we go.” [The doctor said in less than a confident tone as he made the first cut; taking the scalpel across Sarah’s skin in order to remove the bullet from her body. It was excruciating to watch, but I promised myself that no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her side] “Grab those gauze pads and some gloves. Pour some of that vial with sanitizing solution directly over the incision spot and then place the gauze pads firmly across the area to slow her bleeding. We don’t want her losing more blood than she already has.” [The doctor instructed; forcing me to release Sarah’s hand, so I could assist in the surgery. After what felt like an eternity, he finished; managing to remove the bullet and then to seemingly successfully repair damage to her wounded organ internally. Once he finished, he stitched her up then covered the wound with a significant amount of gauze pads and medical tape] “It’s a wait and see, at this point, so let’s hope she’s a fighter.” [The doctor said while washing his hands in the sink in the corner of the room] She is. [I flatly said in response before removing my gloves and washing my own hands once the doctor had finished. After ensuring my hands were clean, I returned to the table where Sarah rested and I took her hand in my own] You’re a fighter, Sarah. The strongest person I know, so fight this. I’m not going anywhere. [I had no way of knowing if she could hear me, but I didn’t care. On the off chance that she could, I was going to remind her of her strength and ability to fight this now]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt the screams into darkness. She felt like she was on a cloud in limo. She had no control of her body; she felt like she was paralyzed. She didn’t have the power to move, she barely felt her body being held up. She didn’t want to die, she didn’t want to be traped in her own bedroom. She never asked her own father to shoot bullets at her and her friends. Sarah suddenly felt like her once simply life was a cycle of nightmares. Death on our door steps, the rush of running; being on the med. Sarah knew her getting shot was her fault. If she had just listened to John B weeks ago; that Ward didn’t have my best interest at heart. 

If I had stayed with Pogues instead of trusting my now psychic family. One trying to kill me left and right. Sarah had learned her lesson, the only people she could count on was herself, the pogues, even her sister she just hoped her sister was okay. She knew she was stipid to be thinking about anyone but herself now. But she held sympathy for others. The aching in her body was enough to force her to scream in pain if she wasn’t knocked out. She vaguely heard the way her body gently was placed down on a mental table.  I vaguely felt John B his breath in my ear as he tried to reassure me I was okay, I was a fighter. I was in my own little bubble. The darkness in my lids, the way my body was lifeless, especially as the doctor did insert his tool into my body, if I was awake I’d be screaming. I barely felt it; probably from the anesthesia. I couldn’t move, I had no idea how long I was out. I could vaguely hear the voices as the doctor echoed out it would be touch and go. Would I be surviving? Was I still bleeding out? Sarah felt the stirs in her mind as she laid still. Baby, fight.. Words echoed in my ears. 

John B, he needed me, he needed me to be strong, to fight through the blood lost. I couldn’t let him down. I was groggy when I suddenly felt the strength to open my eyes. The small light above me it flashed my eyes forcing me to squit, and I felt John B’s head on my stomach, not on the wounded skin, but right under. I was aching as I let out a soft wine. My hand pale as I lowered my hand onto his dirty brown locks, fingers slowly combed through his hair. “ John B.” I echoed in a whisper; I couldn’t speak and I noticed JJ was sitting in the chair, eyes closed, even JJ stayed. A made family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Hours passed by and there was no change. Sarah was so still and I had no way of knowing if she’d ever wake up. The doctor didn’t sound hopeful. Made a snide remark about her chances of pulled through as he greedily took our money and then ran like hell like some kind of coward. Clearly it was all about money for him. As more time passed, I found my head resting against Sarah’s side. Near her incision but not close enough to cause any further damage. I just wanted and needed to be close to her now. JJ wasn’t far away. He took a look out to make sure Ward nor any of his men were nearby before he’d return to the private room here and take a seat in the chair adjacent from where Sarah and I rested now. I didn’t know how much more time had passed… Felt like an eternity even though I knew it was probably just a few more hours, but eventually I heard the faint sound of her voice, as well as felt her fingers rustle gingerly through my hair. At that my head immediately shot up and I looked at her. Relief flooding my face and expression currently] You’re awake! Thank God! [I uttered out in evident relief as I pressed a gentle kiss to the back of her hand] How are you feeling? The black market doctor left a few things for pain if you need it. [The guy wasn’t exactly reliable but he did seem to save Sarah’s life, so at the moment, I was thinking a bit more favorably of him. Maybe he wasn’t a total money-hungry quack after all. Jury was still out on that one though] Do you want some water? [I asked as I had already picked up a fresh bottle of water; prepared to give her some if she was thirsty]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt weak, she ha no idea as to how long she’d been laying her. The memory of her father; of how easily he had aimed a gun at her, at her friends because of what? Jealousy? Because he wanted to hold this wild control over her? Sarah had once desired to please her family. She had once idolize her father the memory of us at the docks when I was only a little girl it clouded who I knew he was. 

But a few hours before he was so willing to throw me under the bus. He was so willing to let me bleed out on our yard. Because of his hate for the Pogues. I was hurt, I was feeling betrayed but at the same time, relieved as I felt my body come to life. I felt my eyes lift open as I adjusted to the dim light. I saw JJ in the corner as my eyes peeled over to John B who had his head rested against my palm. And I knew I was lucky, he was here. He loved me, and I had to let my fingers run soothingly through his dirty blonde locks. A small smile peeled at my lips. And I knew I couldn’t move. I felt numb to my core as my body was now healing from the blood lost, Sarah wasn’t going to jump up, the fear of Ward on our tail was aching against my own skin. The blonde had peered up at him; the man she loved so much. 

“ I’m okay.” As okay as I was going to be. The wound had been deep, the stitched up wound was felt as my eyes slowly moved to the man I loved. My hand moved to reach for John B. And I felt a sigh of relief escape my own lips. And I felt my gaze linger on him. “ I’m sorry, I’m sorry my dad is a crazy,” My words could never compare to the pain my family has caused him, the pogues and I wanted to do my part to mend those fences. “ Yes.” I echoed to the option of water my throat felt dry but I wasn’t going to jump forward, I slowly lifted my head up to get to a sitting position. My free hand had moved to my side, knowing the pain; the wound my own family caused.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I felt mounds of relief when I heard Sarah's voice. She was alive. She was awake, and she was speaking. Lifting her hand to my lips as I pressed a couple of kisses to the back of her hand, then gently lowered her hand back down onto the metal table she was lying on] Hey, don't apologize. It's not your fault. All that matters is keeping you safe and away from your deranged family. [No matter what, I made a promise to myself that I wouldn't let Ward harm Sarah again. I thought to myself as I brought a fresh bottle of water to Sarah's lips, so she could drink as much as she wanted and needed. I knew she needed time to rest and heal, but the sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better I could guarantee her safety from her family. One could hope, at least. I mean the way Ward operated, and the fact that he knew people all over the world, I wasn't sure exactly how far remote we would need to go, and for how long either for that matter, in order to keep Sarah safe, but no matter what, I'd do what it takes. I came close to losing Sarah this time... Too close for comfort, so I wasn't willing to take any chances with her safety again. At least not until Ward was no longer a threat to her] Once you're well enough, we're going to get you out of here. Pope and Kie are keeping an eye on the boat, and when you're strong enough, we're all getting on that boat, and getting as far away as possible. We figure with some distance and preferably some place off the grid, eventually your father will stop looking for you. [Maybe wishful thinking since Ward wasn't one who took well to losing, but one could hope he'd eventually give up and accept that Sarah was gone]

[ofnotakook]

I can always trust in you

@apogueforlife 

I can always trust in you 

Trust; it had to be earned. Love; it had to be developed. For Sarah she always had her guard up. Each time she’d get close to letting someone in the other shoe would drop, she’d freeze up, and run in the other direction. With each boyfriend she ever had she had the urge to run. To distant herself when she felt like she was trapped. When she felt the pressure to feel more than what she did. Topper he liked the idea of her. He loved the idea of being with her; but he wasn’t in love with her. 

There’s only one boy Sarah loved; and that was John B. It happened unexpectedly. It happened on a day she never saw coming. That day stayed with her. The day we went to chapel hill; the day we had fun dressing each other up. The day we pretended to be our alter egos; Val and Vlad. It was nice to be herself. I didn’t feel the pressure to be perfect. I didn’t feel like my family was watching me, I was myself. I felt safe, I felt like John B saw me despite all the flaws I had. He loved me for me, and I loved him. It was a roller coaster of a relationship if you asked me. We had gone from barely knowing each other; to falling completely utterly in love. I gave up my kook card for him. I knew the obsluces we’d be facing now, the pogue’s vs the kook. But nothing made me question my loyalty to him. To the Pogues. It got messy with my dad; him being the reason Big John was gone. The reason why the gold was taken. The reason I was on the run with John B. The gold felt so close yet so far. We managed to clear John B’s name but that’s because Ward decided in his best interest to fake his own death and act like the hero. The guy that claimed to have been a killer in order to protect his own son. Rafe just the thought of being near him made me sick to my stomach. For a second I was upset, I felt like my whole body ached when I witnessed the boat blow up. When I witnessed my father shatter beyond the sea. And that’s when I saw the truth; what led to us being torn apart; what led to John B and I no longer being together. He had been happy to ward dead; and I couldn’t exactly find the words to blame him. He took everything from him. But at the end of the day; he was my dad. I was hurting and I remembered that look all too well; the look of proudnessI felt like I was seeing another person. I was grieving the dad I once looked up to, to the dad that I was once his princess. I needed John B to hold me, to make me feel like it was always going to be okay. But it suddenly felt like us it wasn’t meant to be.. 

Walking away for yourself; was all you could do. It was hard to be near him; to be pulled back into the adventure; to the cross. But for Pope I’d be there; awkwardness assured. Sarah didn’t know if she should make eye contact with him; or just stay silent. Silence seemed better; until that night; we had a plan to get the cross from Rafe; the big truck was parked outside my house. JJ and Pope were hidden behind the bushes. I was determined to walk inside; to get the key to unlock the truck; how we’d get the heavy cross out was a big ass story of it’s own. But I had made two steps to the gates, one glance backwards; I saw him John B was about to get up; and for a second I found myself hopeful; maybe this was the moment of the unknown. What comes next? Dark hues met for a second and I swore the air was taken out of my lungs; but he didn’t budge, didn’t move. Giving me the indication we had nothing left to say. That was the last memory I had of him; of us staring at each other. 

Head leaned against the gated up windows of my room at the barbados house, The house I was locked into. The boat felt like a nightmare; I was drugged by my own family. Rose had put a drug in my tea. Rafe and had helped her execute the plan; to force me here against my will. I remembered telling Ward when he claimed John B only cared about the treasure about the gold that I was just stuck in the cross hair that he was wrong. That John b would find him and come for him once I went missing. How wrong had I been? I wanted to blink back the tears that dared to fall. I was a pogue at heart; I chose it for John B because I loved him, despite our differences he’d always have a permanent place in my heart. It had been weeks since we left on the boat, I had tried to zone out the conversations of my parents; I had pretended to be sleeping at times, but here once I had been pulled into my room I never left. I guess Ward was afraid I’d run, or threaten to tell the cops his own daughter was kidnapped against her will. Give or take. Sarah swallowed the lump in her throat; it had gotten dark. She smelt the tray of food that her sister left her outside the door. Her bed was an inch away; The light pink covers still in place, it had been a day or two since we arrived, and I had slept in my bed because that meant i was okay, that meant that I was adjusting to being here; in this house. When all I wanted was to break free. At the window, on the seat where my back was pressed against the wall. Head tilted towards the window, I could see the water; any boats that passed by. I was alone; and all I could hope was that the Pogue’s were okay that perhaps my dad was right they managed to get the cross and that’s all that mattered for Pope. Eyes moved to the stars; for a moment it was nice to believe we were looking at the same stars; as if John B was on his way; assuming my dad was lying. For now all I could do was hold hope; I’d find a way out; it was a done deal. 

Tomorrow; I’d work out a plan. The Pogues would have me, if I found him. We’d always have each other. A wistful thought as a hint of a smile tainted onto my lips.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Love. Definitely not something I ever believe really existed. I always saw it more as, in life, people come and go. The ones who matter will stick with you, through thick and thin. For me, that was the Pogues: JJ, Kie, and Pope. I don’t remember a time in my life when those three weren’t part of it, and something tells me, I’ll never shake them either. Not that I’d want to, cause they’re everything to me. Then Sarah Cameron busted into my life unexpectedly… One of those surprising moments where I got myself in a sticky situation, and Sarah Cameron, of all people, was the one who bailed me out of it. Even more surprising though was how I felt when I was with her. It was the first time in my life when I found myself wanting to be with a girl exclusively. In time she even made me rethink my original theory about love. Then, well, I guess you could say life happened, and we broke up. Sure, I knew I played a part in our break up. When her father died, I should have been more supportive of the toll that loss would take on Sarah. Yeah, the guy was bad news… A lying crook, which Sarah obviously knew too, but he was still her father. Given the bad blood I had with Ward, and also the fact that he murdered my father, could you really blame me for being relieved that the guy was finally gone? Right or wrong, it’s how I felt. This leading to the end of Sarah’s and my relationship. Still, in my heart I knew this wasn’t the end for us. A love like ours always finds a way back to one another. Naïve or not, I refused to see it any other way…

Then weeks passed and I was starting to wonder if it really had been the end for us. Mind you, I still wasn’t giving up, but instead of dwelling on what may or may not happen between me and Sarah, instead the Pogues and I focused on getting the cross back for Pope. It actually became a, “Kill two birds with one stone” type of adventure for us though, since word got to me that Sarah had been abducted by her family. Them ultimately boarding a ship with Sarah and the cross, allegedly heading to Barbados; knowing that was exactly where we would be going to. This was it… This was our chance to, not only help Pope get the cross back, but also for me to rescue Sarah too…

Given that us Pogues had made some enemies, and also the fact that we didn’t have so much as a pot to piss in, much less money to travel to Barbados, it took some work, a lot of time, and even more creativity on our parts before we finally reached Barbados. Once we did, I knew we needed to devise a plan to get back both Sarah and the cross. Of course JJ, as usual, came up with one of the worst plans I had ever heard. This saying a lot considering JJ’s had some really shitty plans, over the years. This one pretty much topped the other bad plans he’s had though; prompting all of us to shoot down his plan and come up with another one. Knowing it was either come up with a better plan, or go with JJ’s plan which will likely either get us all killed, or at the very least, we’ll end up locked up in some jail cell. In time we did come up with a new plan. Not a great one, but definitely better than JJ’s plan, so it was something, at least. For our part we decided one step at a time…

We’d wait till night, rescue Sarah first, and then once we had her safely out of that house and away from her deranged family, we’d devise a plan to get the cross back. I mean, it’s not like we could just knock on the front door, and request either. Not without being shot, that is. We couldn’t even break in and steal the cross without getting caught, since it was so damn heavy, it was going to take a hell of a lot of brute strength to carry it, so we’d just deal with that plan later. For now, my focus was on Sarah. Sure, I knew there was a chance I’d be the last person she’d want to see tonight, but given me and the Pogue’s rescuing her, or her remaining a hostage with her own family, I figured I was the lesser of the evils, so to speak. I justified as Kie and Pope remained look outs from the ground; keeping hidden to the garden area where they tried to remain unseen, while JJ and I went to the roof. With JJ’s help, he hoisted me down onto the balcony I had scoped out and learned led to the bedroom they were keeping Sarah locked in. Once I approached the balcony window, I peaked inside discreetly; making sure her family was nowhere in sight before I gave a couple of light taps on the window. My way of alerting Sarah that I was here. Of course the window was pad-locked, which just pissed me off more. How could they do this to Sarah? The Cameron’s definition of family was nothing more than a load of bullshit, if you ask me, because this isn’t how you treat family. I thought in building anger as I used the pin I had with me to trigger the lock. Once I heard it click, my eyes shifted up toward JJ. The thumbs up he gave me in reply assuring me he had cut the security system like he confidently told me he could easily handle. This was JJ, so although I’d trust him with my life, and well, I had a few times, I still held my breath as I slowly and gingerly opened the window; expelling a quiet sigh of relief when an alarm didn’t sound as I opened the window] Val…? [I quietly whispered her code name into the dark bedroom. Hoping it would soften any resentment she might have in seeing me here now] Vlad and the crew are here to spring you from here… [I further whispered into the dark bedroom as I waited for her to come over to the window; knowing we didn’t have long before someone would alert the Cameron’s that the security system had been hacked into, so the sooner we got out of there, the better our chances of getting out of here alive]

[ofnotakook]

The pogue plans never went according to plan. Not that Sarah was going to complain now considering. She was able to escape the bars that locked her into her old bedroom. She was tired of starving herself out of spite. She was tired of laying awake at night in fear that she might be dragged out of bed. She was tired of being forced to live the perfect life. Forced to smile for her parents; the only one in her family she liked was her sister Wheezie, she’s who I wanted to protect. But she had young opinions, didn’t see what our family was capable of. And given how much risk John B went through to find me, I had to go with him. Not that I wanted to stay trapped or that I’d risk his life to save my sister. 

I felt torn with myself now. I escaped; I was on the roof; I had survived the lies, I had survived my own father aiming a gun at me; of course to his unknown knowledge Ward did exceed in his aiming and catching fire on one of us. I doubted his attention was to hurt me. Yet again it felt like a toss up considering, he did try to strangle me to death; and drugged me to get onto that stupid boat. But I knew him to know the problem wasn’t my stubbornness, it was John B and the pogues. He was threatened, and right now the Camerons wasn’t my family; it was the pogues. I had chose them a long time ago weather I wanted to admit it or not. 

Safe; is what I felt; despite the pain that was pooling on my side; the white sweater was making it difficult to hide. But I felt his kiss; the graze of his lips on my head, a tenderness of who we were. A love language for us. Seeing as JJ had followed my lead; and started down the ladder; I had stepped forward turning my back to where my hues fell on the male I loved with all my heart. Despite our differences that did come to light when I uttered the words maybe we weren’t meant to be, to work out. 

A soulfulness in my stare as I uttered my words. “ Promise you’ll come down.” I mouthed the words “ I can’t lose you.” As my palm wasn’t already filled with my own blood. Taking my hand from side, I placed them firmly on the handles of the ladder, with one step and than the next. I caught sight of the droplets of blood hitting the ladder as I climbed down, It wasn’t until I reached the bottom, I felt JJ; place his hand on my hip in order to help me off when he wore this stunned expression. “ Sarah.” He mouthed, I knew he felt it; the blood that now covered his hand; I shook my head. “ Don’t say a word.” I had strength I’d be okay until I couldn’t walk anymore; He was about to say something when I hit him in the chest. 

John B would be in earshot; I couldn’t tell him yet; once we were in the clear I’d tell him, but I didn’t want him to worry about me, not after all the risks he took to save me. Pushing myself to the side, I eyed the small area where our feet hit the grass; Kie and Pope had to make it to the gates; where it led to the waterfront it was our get away. Our only glimmer of hope.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

I promise. I’ll be right behind you. [I assured Sarah as I watched JJ go down the ladder first, to ensure it was safe for Sarah to follow. Once JJ gave the “all clear” signal, I gave Sarah and nod to begin descending the ladder] You’ll be okay. JJ will meet you at the bottom, and I won’t be far behind. [I reminded her as she started to descend the ladder. I ducked down lower to the roof as I heard the sound of more gunshots looming in the air. Once Sarah was about halfway down the ladder, I started to position myself onto the ladder; getting a good grip on the sides before I slowly began descending the ladder too. It wasn’t long before I could faintly hear Sarah and JJ safely at the bottom on the ground below the ladder, and I was following them moments later. After I reached the bottom, I noticed the concerned look JJ was giving me, but assuming it had something to do with the fact that we were all still in danger on the Cameron’s grounds, I didn’t question JJ on his strange look. Instead, I snaked my arm gently and protectively around Sarah’s shoulder; gently tugging her closer to me before speaking up in a hushed volume] Okay, we made it this far, which is great, but we’re not out of danger yet. Let’s get to Pope and Kie, and then all of us get the hell out of here. [I suggested before nodding my head toward JJ; gesturing for him to lead the way. The sooner we all got the hell out of here, the better our chances would be of us surviving this]

[ofnotakook]

He’d be right behind me. It was a sense of comfort knowing I wasn’t alone.That I was nearly to safety but the question lingered of how long. Because I felt the bleeding on my hip, I felt the lost of blood that peeled from my skin. Not that Sarah was about to utter a word. If she did their plan of escaping would be jeopardized. And JJ and John B had risked it all for her. Kie and Pope were on the lower ground taking cover on her behalf. Sarah wasn’t selfish; she knew when to take one for the team. Her dad; his shots that were fired. It was venages for her; for the Pogues brainwashing her; but the truth was Sarah saw beneath the scars. She saw the truth. The perfect knit family wasn’t real. She had hoped her father would be okay; that he would let her go. Let the pogues go give John B what was rightfully his. 

But instead he saw me as property. I wasn’t a person to him. I was his daughter yes; but I also was my own mind and heard. All that to say I tried not to shake when I heard the gunshots in the distance. I had my hands holding onto the ladder as JJ slowly helped me down. Blood it was obvious at the edge of the ladder; I easily shook my head to JJ; indicating John B didn’t need to know. I was fine. I Swore I caught an edge of concern against his expression. Did JJ care? I asked myself as feet hit the pavement; the edge of the roof as we lowered ourselves down to the ground. His arm was comfort; he was there with me every step of the way. 

Reaching up with my cleared hand; I intertwined my palm with his own. Above my shoulder as I forced a smile. “ almost there.” I whispered as i felt the throbbing on my side; the dripping of redness down my leg; I just hoped it was dark enough to hide. Enough to give us a clear out before I had to say the words. I was shot; a haunting thought as I saw Kie and Pope in sight. 

“ Once we step down one last step, run to the gates, there’s a boat waiting okay. I’ll get the keys.” I told myself it was a solid plan; despite my obvious discomfort to myself. I leaned up to press a kiss to John B’s hand lips against his thumb before I gave the nod to Kie and Pope. 

It was time to run; it was our only chance; even if it meant the Pogues leaving without me; I could handle my injury and my dad; but John B needed an escape or his life was at risk; and right now I cared less about me and more about his safety. “ Run.” Whispered as hands released his own as my body heavily dropped to the ground. Shots being fired; I leaned down enough to swat; to hide under until the walkway cleared.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I gave a nod of relief to Sarah and JJ once our feet finally hit the pavement below. Sure, I knew we still had a challenge ahead of us, even more of one now that Ward knew I had taken Sarah, so I guarantee he wasn’t the only one firing a gun currently. Now we had him, and his whole damn security department firing at us, too. Regardless, we made it this far, which to some, seemed like an impossible feat in and of itself, but we’re still alive, so that’s something. I justified optimistically as Sarah told us the next part of the plan. Good thing we managed to get her out, because JJ nor I had come up with an escape plan. In normal pogue fashion, we planned to wing it once we reached the point… You know, assuming that we made it this far, I should say] Okay, babe. [I said as I heard her instruct us to “run,” and then she released my hand. Given how close I had already come to losing her, I wasn’t about to let her out of my sight; especially in a dangerous situation like this. With that protective thought in mind, I hadn’t run far before realizing she was no longer at my side, or even behind me] Sarah? Sarah, where are you? [I asked in a hushed volume as I started to back track to find her. It didn’t take me long before I nearly tripped over her as she laid down onto the ground] What are you doing? Are you okay? [Assuming maybe she tripped and hurt herself or something, which is why she didn’t get up and continue running with us. Either way, I waited for the latest bout of gun shots to fade out before I helped Sarah up from the ground. This time snaking my arm around her to keep her close as we prepared to catch up with the others] Can you walk? [Prepared to carry her on my back if she was hurt and couldn’t run. Whatever it took to get Sarah safely out of here, I was all for doing it. Sarah’s safety and freedom was my top priority right now]

[ofnotakook]

A getaway plan; honestly Sarah could easily say she had the grounds of the priority mapped out in her head. But the times she’s visited this house she could count on her hand. It was slim; but right now she had to save herself or she risked the chance of Ward getting his hooks not just in her; but it put the pogues in danger. The same people who risked their lives in order to save her. Sarah didn’t take it for granted; she knew she was a mess. She was someone who was torn between love and her family. But she was locked in her own room on more than one occasion. Her father proved he only cared about the gold. It stung; it made Sarah feel like shit; like she wasn’t enough for her own father. 

But now wasn’t the time; the end was near. She felt her knees wobbly, she felt the lost of blood elevate against her frame. Feet planted against the pavement; her eyes scanned the grounds until they reached Kie and Poper who had keys in their hands; they found the keys to the boat under one of my rocks. It was kinda my getaway car back in the day when I wanted to be reckless; I wanted an escape; apparently it was my younger self telling me to be prepared. Because right now our best bet was to run. Run through the pavements; the mountains of trees to get to the edge. I whispered the words. JJ didn’t need any admission; he ran like hell while guns were being fired. Fired at us; which is why I ducked. Not voluntarily; I had fallen to my knees. I had fell right to the ground. I felt my lungs closing off; I felt the air in my body slowly leaving, as I felt my frame hit the ground in a huff. 

I knew John B; he’d never leave without me. I was kinda surprised he hadn’t picked up on the trail of blood I left on the roof; the ladder in my wake. But to my surprise my secret was that a secret. Eyes closed growing heavy that was until I felt his hands roll onto my own palms. Fingers curled around his hands as I slowly pushed myself back onto my feet. “ I’m okay.” A fat lie I screamed at myself. The dirty blonde moved in the threes; in the brushes; her sneakers ran across the lawn until she heard her feet against the pavement. “ John B.. If I fall behind I need you to run like hell okay.” A demand not an ask. The female whispered in a low tone as fingers tighten around his palm. “ I was shot..’ The words stuck on her tongue as she paused; glancing down to her hip; her hip where there was a big ass stain of redness under her sweater; the white sweater now red; she bit down on her lip in fear; and now she’d be the reason they got caught; from running for their lives. 

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what, I would never leave Sarah behind. She was everything to me. Including my favorite pain in the ass that I argued with like we were already a married couple. Point is, I loved Sarah more than life itself, and even though things were a bit up in the open currently between us, that didn’t matter, because I would always come for her. Case and point when I saw her drop down and without a second thought or hesitation, I went back for her and then waited until she was ready to move before we continued our escape. My face turned pale though as I could feel the blood leaving my cheeks when I heard her confession about being shot] What? You were shot? [Quietly repeating the words back to myself, as if trying to process it, but also hoping that I had heard her wrong and she’d correct me now. Judging by the blood I saw that had stained her shirt, I knew I hadn’t imagined it. My worst nightmare was happening now in the fact that Sarah was hurt] It’s going to be okay. I’ll get you out of here and then we’ll get you help. [I assured her. No way in hell of knowing if she was going to be okay or not. I mean, she was shot. With a bullet. She was bleeding, and I had no way of knowing how much blood she’s lost already, because I was just now hearing she was hurt] Let’s get you on my back, and I’ll carry you out of here. [My way of letting her know that, no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her behind, so this way, if we get caught, we’re going to do so together. I silently justified as I squatted down as low as I could, so Sarah didn’t have to strain too much to shift onto my back]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s family was the why the Pogue’s were in this mess. The why we were fighting for our life’s. Namely the finger needed to be pointed towards my father. The man who wanted to be a proud family man, adoring father was willing to aim guns at his own daughter. He chose a hell of a long time ago. I wasn’t the kook anymore; I was a pogue; the family I decided I wanted. My pure love and adoration for John B. He was my everything. The boy I wanted to bicker with day and night. The boy I wanted to run on adventures with. He understood me, I never felt alone with him; I never felt like I had to pretend. I always felt trapped, the need to run from how I felt those strong feelings until I met him. Until we kissed; and fell insanely in love. 

And this island; the gold being unreachable now; was on me. I was the one who believed in my dad; kept opening my mouth and claiming he loves me, he’d never hurt me. I was the fool a disgrace not only had my brother tried to kill me drown me, my own dad wanted me dead. I had nothing but John B and the pogue’s. They were all I needed. 

Each leg of movement was starting to cause a strain on my body. I had no issues running; it was the open wound on my abdomen that was preventing me from moving fast enough. Knees weak, I could barely keep up. I heard the others in a distant reach the boat; the boat that was gassed up; the keys I knew where they were hidden the backup keys I mean. I remembered going out on this boat as a child; for our family trips on the ocean. What an embarrassing moment now considering. Leaning over my frame; eyes staring at the grass that touched my ankles. Head moving to stare between my legs in order to catch my panting breaths. I felt weak, I said the words. And I swore I heard John B stop; he paused in disbelief but the writing was pooling down my legs; the droplets of blood obvious. Tilting my head up I bit down on my lower lip to hold in the whine the pain of my wound. “ John B..” Name lingered on my tongue as tried to find the how I’d get this boy to leave without me. Instead he decided to bend down to the ground. I hesitated, I didn’t want to hold him back. “ I..” I started but I also know this boy; he’d risk it all for me. It didn’t make sense for both of us to risk being caught here, but with last minute thinking I pulled myself onto his back. Arms wrapped loosely around his neck. Legs wrapping around his waist, once I was safely on his back I rested my head on his shoulder. “ You can move now..” I echoed in a nearly teasing retort. Keep it light; until we escaped. 

A death trap of my own making.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[No matter what happened, I would never leave Sarah behind. I wasn’t stupid. I knew us breaking into her family’s compound tonight to break her out was a death trap. It was a fool’s errand, but I didn’t care. Sarah was in danger. She might not see how deranged her father and brother are, but I knew. I saw first-hand what her psychotic father was capable of, so I wouldn’t put anything past him now. Including him hurting his own daughter just to ensure he kept her far away from me. The man was a damn lunatic and the sooner I got Sarah away from him, the better off she’d be. The driving reason I broke into her room tonight. Well, “prison” was probably a more fitting word given the bars her father had put on her windows, so she could be kept there as his prisoner. Asshole. I thought in disdain as we ran toward some semblance of safety. I stopped though when I realized Sarah was no longer behind me. Panic setting in since it was dark, which made it difficult to see. Following the sounds of her breaths and rustling through the grass as I back-tracked back toward her. Shock and fear washing over me in hearing she had been shot. A part of me wondering if taking her back to her father was the best course of action, since his ties and pull could have a doctor here in moments. Still, something told me she wouldn’t want to go back there. She’d choose to take the risk to keep moving] I’ve got you. Don’t worry. I’d never leave without you, Sarah. [I assuredly whispered out as I helped her get situated safely on my back; ensuring her arms were wrapped tightly around my neck and her legs secured around my waist before I started through the trees and such in search of JJ and the others] “John B? Where the hell are you?” [I heard the familiar sound of JJ’s voice airing out nearby in a hushed tone. Moving in the direction of his voice, I eventually caught up with them. Keeping Sarah securely on my back as we reached them] “Ready for the next part of the plan? The diversion?” [JJ asked with pride in his voice, which prompted a skeptical look from me. All of us knowing JJ wasn’t the best at plans, but I did feel better when Pope and Kie chimed in to share that they had actually helped with this part of the plan] If it gets us out of here, then hell yeah, do it! [I muttered out as I watched JJ throw a lit flare in the direction of the wooded area we had all just escaped from, before throwing two others in separate directions of the same wooded area. Listening and watching as I saw a small explosion go off, followed by another, and then countless more. Pope and Kie explaining they rigged those while they were waiting for us to break Sarah out. Chuckling in pride and feeling a momentary sense of victory as I realized we temporarily stopped Ward’s guards from catching up; prompting us to continue running the remaining way off of the compounds and then into the city. Now it was just a matter of finding a place to hide out and to get Sarah medical attention] Sarah was shot, so we need to get her to a doctor before we do anything else. [I explained to the others; watching the wheels practically turning in their head on how to work this one out without all of us ending up getting caught]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah’s greatest fear was her friends, was the boy she loved getting hurt on her behalf. She always believed in the good in her father; that he had made mistakes. But when it came to their family he always held their best interest at heart. But all the evidence was staked against him. He faked his own death; he was okay with putting his arms around my neck. He was okay with shooting a bullet not knowing where it land. And Sarah was caught in that crossfire. She was scared that her now slow pace would hurt the pogues in the end. Her new Family. And she knew better than to fight with John B, than to plead with him to keep going without her. He’d never leave her behind. He was noble, he was the man that loved her more than his own life. 

And she’d risk it all for him too. He was the light in her new darkness. Sarah tried to hide it; the trail of blood she now kept behind her. She held the wound to her hip as tightly as she could; until she fell. She fell forward breathing heavily feeling the impact of loss blood. She was trying to move forward in the deep grass; but her feet stopped. She had hoped the male had moved far enough forward to forget; about her. But his voice was like a compass calling her home. And she had to smile to herself as she pulled herself onto his back. Bitting down on her lip knowing she was in pain; that pain in her side, the pool of blood that was now hitting his shirt. Head slowly came to rest on his shoulder; weakness inside of her. “ I know..” She whispered in a weakened tone. She held on for dear life; she had her arms wrapped around his neck, and her legs slid around his waist; a sense of safety; as we neared the spot where the others were. 

The night was dark; no one noticed her pale face; the weaken state she was in. Another phase to the plan? Her eyes trailed over to the smirks of her friends; the explosions that they had in fact thrown in the direction of each guard growing on their tails. A small smirk tugged at her lips. Severs Ward right, to come for family; and you get burned. The others glanced at her; as the elephant in the room was exposed. She was shot; weak; blood pooling out of her as she spoke. “ I’m fine.” She said as she rested her head back down on his shoulder. She vaguely heard JJ make a plan. “ We run into town. There’s abandoned buildings, maybe we find a doctor office on our way.” It wasn’t settle or optimistic in any form; but maybe if we found supplies; I could stitch up my own wound. I had no desire to see a doctor again; nor could we trust any person wouldn’t go running to Ward. So I had barely said a word; leaving the decision up to John B; he was the fighter; the leader in this mess. I’d trust him; I’d follow him anywhere.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I nodded in response to JJ’s suggestion. No offense to my best friend, or anything, but when he came up with plans, they usually crashed and burned. Then again, his idea to break Sarah out wasn’t his worst plan. Mind you, she did get shot as a result of the escape, but I don’t know if I can necessarily blame JJ’s plan for that, or just pin the blame on Ward for being a deranged and psychotic piece of shit] I think heading toward the town is a good idea, but Sarah definitely needs a doctor. Kai, you still have the fake IDs we had made up for all of us, right? [Kai nodded in response while flashing me a confused look] Okay, so if we go to a doctor’s office or hospital, we can use the fake IDs, so Sarah’s identity doesn’t get back to her father. Either way, we need to get the bullet out of Sarah, and get her stitched up. That’s our first priority once we get off of this property. [I explained. Knowing Sarah was getting weaker from the blood loss, so the sooner we got her gunshot wound tended to, the more at ease I would feel that she’s going to be okay. Honestly, at this point in time, my only concern was Sarah. I kept that thought to myself though, because I knew if I startled to unravel with worry, everyone else would begin unraveling too. Bottom line, we weren’t going to make it out of this situation alive if we didn’t remain level headed and make the right decisions]

[ofnotakook]

Right decisions; was it ever in our nature? To be smart, to not lead on impulse? In the short time Sarah spend with John B and the pogues, she’s learned JJ and John B tended to make decisions on a whim. They tended to come up with a plan and without thinking ran with it. Granted it Sarah owed her life to the poges, she owed the idea that she was released from the bars of her own bedroom due to them. And she appreciated the fact given the limbo state the male and myself were tethered into that they risked it all for me. The wrath from my dad; the Camerons’s who I was learning spelled terrible news. Sarah always believed in her dad; the type of man he was. He was kind, he cared about his family wanted to provide for us. But the money the power it gave a person it tended to steamroll you into a horrible person. Sarah couldn’t believe her eyes; the lengths her dad was willing to go, harming his own daughter, embedding Rafe despite his own crimes. She felt disgusted with her own family. The blonde knew where she belonged; where her heart was. Holding onto dear life to the man she currently had her arms wrapped around. 

The blonde let nimble fingers graze over the thin layer of his shirt; the weak grip she held. Her wound was obvious, the blood pooling down her leg. Ward got her damn good. And Sarah hated her fate was on the edge of a line. Doctors wasn’t an option, she knew this island. She knew Ward was probably on a warpath now for blood. Pogues won by letting my escape happen, and now he’d be paying off any source he could, to get his hands on me. 

The female listened despite her own body was fading, head rested upon his head; the comfort of his scent, she was always safe with him. Eyes blinked open and closed, and she slowly let her weaken vision take in the pogue’s who glanced in every direction Smoke of the explosion was all in the air, intoxicating. “ Go South, we get on the boat, and port half way down the island, there’s a hidden office, our best bets is escaping this house.” A thought for food; a hidden doctors office; one that may get me home sailing. 

Without the risk of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I wasn’t at all surprised that, in spite of her condition, Sarah was the one to air out the best and most sensible plan. Giving a nod in response as I looked toward JJ and the others] You heard her. Head south. [I said in agreement as I continued carrying Sarah on my back as we all made route south toward the docks. Knowing our risk was still higher than not of getting caught, but she was right… If we had a chance of getting out of here and to freedom, this was the one with the best odds. More than anything though, I just wanted to get her somewhere safe, so she could get some medical attention. I could hear by how weak her voice was that she was losing a lot of blood. The longer this continues, the worse her chances of survival were. Once we reached the docks, we ducked into the shadows until reaching the boat. I made sure to get Sarah on safely, and then I laid her down across one of the seats to rest, while I helped JJ and Pope to untie the ropes; all the while Kai started up the boat. Knowing we’d all need to work together, and to do so quickly, or else we weren’t getting out of here alive] Okay, Kai, we’re clear. Get us the hell out of here. [I called out to her as me and the other guys pushed the boat away from the dock to give it an oomph and then once the boat was cleared from the sides, I returned to Sarah] How bad is it? [I asked as I grabbed the first aid kit stowed under the one seat. Not that I could do much with my incredibly limited experience and knowledge, but I felt helpless by not doing what I could for her now. Besides, if I could at least slow the bleeding, that would give her the best fighting chance to stay alive until we were able to get her medical attention]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt like she had lost everything. She used to be the girl who would always go to the beck and call of her dad; he used to be the incredible man she grew up with. He used to be the man who read bedtime stories to her. He used to give her a glass of milk each time. She had so many fond memories of him. But now; it felt like those memories were tainted. Sarah had always believed in him, she fought the urges to go against him. Seeing his boat explode it destroyed her; she broke up with John B the man she loved for him, because he was glad the man who took his father away got justice. Was dead. And suddenly it felt like our love wasn’t meant to be. 

And now Sarah was bleeding out because of the man who was supposed to protect her. He shot fire at her; at her friends not caring of the consequences. That was the sadness of the reality. That I was alone. I couldn’t turn to my sister, I couldn’t protect. I had to put myself first, and that was the pogues my made family. We lift each other up, we go to bat for each other. And I knew the high stakes. I knew what my father was capable of. I had to wonder how I had any ounce of love for him after what he’s done. Lying to protect Rafe, letting my brother get away with attempting to drown me, he let me get drugged. He’d rather put harm to me than take accountability. And I had to swallow that truth. With a heavy head I felt like my vision was becoming blur as I spurred the last task at hand. Hands loosen on the grip against John B’s shirt, as my eyes drifted shut. How long had we walked? Before I heard the rustling of feet hitting the docks. And I felt my body being dropped gently into the boat, back pressed against a hard backing on the edge. Slowly eyes lifted seeing blurs. 

Figures moving left and right; the “ Ropes done.” I heard from JJ as both boys plopped themselves down on the boat. Pope was at the wheel with Kie, I heard the soft whispers of nothingness. And I heard his voice, the one that always dragged me home. And I wanted to be honest, as my hand slowly nimbly moved against the dam fabric of my sweater as I lifted it up. And I saw it the blood, it was dark, and it explained why I felt faint. Turning my eyes to the man I loved; John B was preparing to bandage up the wound for a short time. “ It doesn’t look pretty, I’ll have a nasty scar if anything.” I aired out attempting to lighten the mood as I felt the boat move as if it was full of lighten. 

This remembered me of when I saved his ass, when we first started out; on our little adventure. A shy grin turned against my lips as I spoke. “ Last time one of us had to bandage the other up, I was sneaking you into the house, I saved your ass, are we finally repaying the favor?” I asked with a sense of teasing in my voice. Definitely not the time, but I needed a laugh a small brief moment for just us.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Although I knew now wasn’t the time for jokes and quips, I still appreciated the fact that Sarah was trying to keep the mood light between us. Maybe if the circumstances had been reversed, I would have been all for cracking jokes… Hell, I would more than likely be cracking them too. Given that Sarah had been shot and was rapidly losing blood though, I definitely wasn’t in a fun and games kind of mindset. For her sake though, I did flash her a grin as I leaned down to press a tender kiss to her forehead] Well, I figured I owed you so it was high time I stepped up and returned the favor. Maybe next time you want me to save you though, let’s go with something that involves less blood shed and need for panic… Deal? [Giving it my best effort to joke in return. In the meantime I grabbed the first aid kit. My hand shaking slightly as I quickly fished around for some bandaging and things I thought I could use to stop the bleeding] Either way, I’m putting you in charge of keeping an eye on me to make sure I’m doing this right. I mean, doctor stuff is new territory for me so I’ll need the supervision. All that to say, eyes open at all times, okay? [My casual way of requesting to Sarah that I wanted her to keep her eyes open. Afraid that if she closed them and fell asleep, I might lose her. A thought that I couldn’t bear to consider as I started to do what I could to apply pressure to her wound and then applied some gauze and then bandaging too, all in an effort to stop the significant bleeding she was currently experiencing]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah was well aware of the bleeding that now wasn’t the time for her humor, for her need to crack a joke open. But Sarah could see how scared he was; it was in his eyes. She was scared herself that she was about to take her last breath, by the hands of her own father. Ward had no idea she was assuming that he had aimed for her; she had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. Her own father pulled the trigger; he was aiming a weapon at her friends, at the man she loved. And now she was facing deaths door; she remembered the last time. 

John B was the one aching in pain as she ran her fingers with a cold rag over his blooded wound; which is why the dirty blonde showed amusement. Or she was going nuts with the lack of blood in her system. Eyes had slowed movement as he spoke; and she knew this was his way of saying “ Stop Sarah.” As if she planned on taking a bullet tonight. But her smile soften knowing feeling the panic under his tone, and her slimmed hand; her hand reached to touch his arm as a soothing of reassurance that she was okay. “ I promise next time, I’ll tell my dad not to shoot.” She echoed with that sarcastic retort of hers. But Sarah was done with the jokes. Not that she had the energy. She felt like her body was giving out; she felt the color had now drained from her face in the dark. She barely felt the boat moving against the water; the ocean seas; the seas that used to bring soothing. That used to make her feel safe; and now she was trembling, she felt his hand on her wound; and she had glanced down the blood was soaking her skin, right through his hand. “ Use the guse to wipe around the wound, and then bandage it gently at least until we arrive.” To a doctor; assuming we had the money to get me treated; or this was the end. Her eyes landed back on his features, and she uttered an “ I love you.” As if it was the last words she’d say. 

Eyes kept fluttering open and shut in a daze, despite the promise to stay with him, to guide him through the process; she hardly felt her hand move down to her side; as if her limbs were jelly now. If only this boat would move any faster..

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[I appreciated Sarah’s attempt to crack jokes now. That was kinda our thing, you could say, but at the moment, I felt far from laughing. I was worried and growing even more so with every passing second. Sarah was shot. She was bleeding out currently, and I had no way of knowing if we’d get her medical attention in time to save her] Speed up the boat! Let’s go! [I yelled out to Pope and Kie as I saw Sarah’s eyes close. Judging by the worried look on JJ’s face, I knew he was thinking the same thing I was] Hurry the hell up, JJ, and help me pack her wound. Quick, get those gauze pads from the bag! [My voice shaking in building worry as JJ did as I ordered; grabbing me what I needed as I tossed the now soiled and blood soaked gauze pads to the side as I took the clean ones from JJ’s grasp. My hand shaking as I pressed it against Sarah’s gunshot wound. After what felt like a damn eternity, the boat pulled to a stop. I didn’t exactly know where we were at the moment, but at this point Pope and Kie were tying off the boat to the pier, so it wouldn’t go anywhere, and then they rushed toward us] “Come on. I got word that there’s a surgeon in town who handles cases like this for the right price.” [Pope explained which prompted my brows to furrow in confusion] “Get Sarah, let’s go.” [Kie instructed, which prompted me to tape off the currently gauzed padding I had in place, then JJ helped me to lift Sarah carefully out of the boat and onto the pier. Once JJ and I were on the pier, I cradled Sarah securely in my arms] “Here, take this bag. It should be enough to get her treated. Pope and I will stay with the boat.” [Kie said as JJ grabbed the bag and the address of the warehouse doctor, and then we rushed through the dark night air toward the provided address. A less than ideal situation from all angles given Sarah’s condition and the fact that we were in an unfamiliar place looking for the location of a doctor that we knew nothing about. Talk about a wild card move, at its best] Stay with me, Sarah. We’re going to get you help. Keep fighting. [I called out to her as JJ barked out instructions and I merely kept up with his pace as I carried Sarah in my arms toward our destination]

[ofnotakook]

A scar that might kill me. 

It was a thought for Sarah; she felt like she’d been through the ringer. Her own family was willing to sacrifice her for their own benefits. Sarah once thought the world of her father; of the family. But now she knew the truth they only craved the wealth they’d stomp on anyone who dared to stand in their way. Sarah’s own brother tried to drown her, and now her father was the one who pulled the trigger. Obviously he was aiming for John B, but Sarah knew she’d always end up in the cross fire. 

Not that she cared, she’d rather die than live without him. The words she said that night; on the smaller boat, as John B fought for his life, to escape the death sentence. And I meant it; I loved John B and yeah we fought; we ended up screaming at each other. But i’d do anything to be with him, and now as I was fighting for my own life; I only hoped the pogues survived. Sarah was falling unconscious, she had felt her body shutting off. The last words she spoke were of love, an undenying world of love for him. But she felt the blood lost. She felt her wounds becoming fetel. And she heard the urgent, the eagerness in her man’s voice as she felt the vague packing of her wound. How long had it been? 

She had no idea, because she felt darkness overcome her. She felt like she was falling into limo. She barely felt John B and JJ as they wrapped her sim arms around their shoulders and held her up. Enough to look like Sarah was walking, but she was dragged towards the clinic, and she barely heard the exchange when the surgeon called the three up. And with each step, she felt a slight ache in her body. An ache she wanted to subside. But Sarach knew she had to fight; to live, to open her eyes again. She felt her frame fall to a bedding; as her head hung down as the surgeon whispered. “ It’ll be okay, fight.” And She fel the breathing tube come to her nose, she felt the bleeding that was exposed. The doctor mumbled a few words to her friends. “ Do you have the money? She may not live.” He uttered and I felt my body weak. My own shadow breathing as my eyes slowly woke, for a second to see the unfamiliar surroundings, the walls brown. The tubes connected to me, I was scared. But I couldn’t move before my eyes went shut all over again. 

The doctor took the money and he soon took a tool; to save me, if it did any good, because right now I felt like I was on the brink of death.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

“Yeah, man. Here.” [JJ aired out in response to the shifty doctor’s request for money, before handing him a bag with money in it. My eyes shifted into a roll watching the doctor count it. So much for a moral code to save a life. Apparently all this asshole cared about what money] Just save her. Please. [I aired out pleadingly as I held Sarah’s hand with my one hand; all the while gently stroking back the hair from her face with my free hand. After a moment or so the doctor seemed satisfied with the amount of money JJ gave him inside that bag, and then he began. Watching as he first put Sarah under with what I assumed to be some kind of anesthesia before he grabbed a questionable looking scalpel so he could begin making the first cut. I knew in my gut that trusting this doctor might be the worst idea we’ve ever had, but at the same point, our hands were tied. It was either this option or we’d lose Sarah. Sure, his “she may not live” statement didn’t leave me with much confidence in his skills, but I had to believe in Sarah now. Sarah was strong. She was brave. If anyone could fight this, it was her] Come on, baby. Fight this. Don’t you dare leave me. Fight, baby. Fight. [I gently pleaded in her ear before pressing a tender kiss to her forehead] “Keep watch.” [I heard the doctor instruct of JJ before giving me a knowing sort of look and then a nod] “Here we go.” [The doctor said in less than a confident tone as he made the first cut; taking the scalpel across Sarah’s skin in order to remove the bullet from her body. It was excruciating to watch, but I promised myself that no matter what, I wasn’t leaving her side] “Grab those gauze pads and some gloves. Pour some of that vial with sanitizing solution directly over the incision spot and then place the gauze pads firmly across the area to slow her bleeding. We don’t want her losing more blood than she already has.” [The doctor instructed; forcing me to release Sarah’s hand, so I could assist in the surgery. After what felt like an eternity, he finished; managing to remove the bullet and then to seemingly successfully repair damage to her wounded organ internally. Once he finished, he stitched her up then covered the wound with a significant amount of gauze pads and medical tape] “It’s a wait and see, at this point, so let’s hope she’s a fighter.” [The doctor said while washing his hands in the sink in the corner of the room] She is. [I flatly said in response before removing my gloves and washing my own hands once the doctor had finished. After ensuring my hands were clean, I returned to the table where Sarah rested and I took her hand in my own] You’re a fighter, Sarah. The strongest person I know, so fight this. I’m not going anywhere. [I had no way of knowing if she could hear me, but I didn’t care. On the off chance that she could, I was going to remind her of her strength and ability to fight this now]

[ofnotakook]

Sarah felt the screams into darkness. She felt like she was on a cloud in limo. She had no control of her body; she felt like she was paralyzed. She didn’t have the power to move, she barely felt her body being held up. She didn’t want to die, she didn’t want to be traped in her own bedroom. She never asked her own father to shoot bullets at her and her friends. Sarah suddenly felt like her once simply life was a cycle of nightmares. Death on our door steps, the rush of running; being on the med. Sarah knew her getting shot was her fault. If she had just listened to John B weeks ago; that Ward didn’t have my best interest at heart. 

If I had stayed with Pogues instead of trusting my now psychic family. One trying to kill me left and right. Sarah had learned her lesson, the only people she could count on was herself, the pogues, even her sister she just hoped her sister was okay. She knew she was stipid to be thinking about anyone but herself now. But she held sympathy for others. The aching in her body was enough to force her to scream in pain if she wasn’t knocked out. She vaguely heard the way her body gently was placed down on a mental table.  I vaguely felt John B his breath in my ear as he tried to reassure me I was okay, I was a fighter. I was in my own little bubble. The darkness in my lids, the way my body was lifeless, especially as the doctor did insert his tool into my body, if I was awake I’d be screaming. I barely felt it; probably from the anesthesia. I couldn’t move, I had no idea how long I was out. I could vaguely hear the voices as the doctor echoed out it would be touch and go. Would I be surviving? Was I still bleeding out? Sarah felt the stirs in her mind as she laid still. Baby, fight.. Words echoed in my ears. 

John B, he needed me, he needed me to be strong, to fight through the blood lost. I couldn’t let him down. I was groggy when I suddenly felt the strength to open my eyes. The small light above me it flashed my eyes forcing me to squit, and I felt John B’s head on my stomach, not on the wounded skin, but right under. I was aching as I let out a soft wine. My hand pale as I lowered my hand onto his dirty brown locks, fingers slowly combed through his hair. “ John B.” I echoed in a whisper; I couldn’t speak and I noticed JJ was sitting in the chair, eyes closed, even JJ stayed. A made family.

[apogueforlife]

@ofnotakook

[Hours passed by and there was no change. Sarah was so still and I had no way of knowing if she'd ever wake up. The doctor didn't sound hopeful. Made a snide remark about her chances of pulled through as he greedily took our money and then ran like hell like some kind of coward. Clearly it was all about money for him. As more time passed, I found my head resting against Sarah's side. Near her incision but not close enough to cause any further damage. I just wanted and needed to be close to her now. JJ wasn't far away. He took a look out to make sure Ward nor any of his men were nearby before he'd return to the private room here and take a seat in the chair adjacent from where Sarah and I rested now. I didn't know how much more time had passed... Felt like an eternity even though I knew it was probably just a few more hours, but eventually I heard the faint sound of her voice, as well as felt her fingers rustle gingerly through my hair. At that my head immediately shot up and I looked at her. Relief flooding my face and expression currently] You're awake! Thank God! [I uttered out in evident relief as I pressed a gentle kiss to the back of her hand] How are you feeling? The black market doctor left a few things for pain if you need it. [The guy wasn't exactly reliable but he did seem to save Sarah's life, so at the moment, I was thinking a bit more favorably of him. Maybe he wasn't a total money-hungry quack after all. Jury was still out on that one though] Do you want some water? [I asked as I had already picked up a fresh bottle of water; prepared to give her some if she was thirsty]