“Ash, no,” he shook his head, wanting to pull her away, but not knowing whether touching her would upset her or reassure. She was right, this stranger had stolen their kiss, and it upset him and made him feel sick all at once, but he didn’t want the woman hurt, and more than that, he didn’t want Ash to get in trouble for causing her to be hurt. “Please, let’s just- let’s go home. If you kill her we’ll be forced apart for good,” he offered with a forced smile, wanting desperately to make her feel better, to move forward, to erase what had just happened from existence.
Ashlyn knew he meant well. They really did, but with the smudges of purple on his lips and the way his hair was just slightly messed up from the embrace, it hurt to look at him, it hurt to be there. A part of them knew deep down that he did nothing wrong, but looking at him made their chest boil with anger. And panic. Because what if that had been better than any kiss Ash had given him?
They looked at the girl, a mixture of rage and envy surging through their veins. They were everything Ash wished they were-- tall, blonde, tall...She was perfect, honestly. And maybe that was the kind of partner Nic needed, he didn’t need some short trash goblin with severe anger issues. Ash took a step back, stumbling slightly in the heels they wore.
“I-- I can’t. I can’t look at you right now.” Ash couldn’t meet his eyes as they said those words, only at the lipstick on his mouth. They felt tears burning the back of their eyes, their palms getting sweaty, their heart beating faster...fuck. Ash took another step back as they tried to control their breathing before turning around quickly and pushing through the crowd.
Why did Ara have to go to England? They lost their best friend, the only one who’d want to punch holes in the wall while they cried and drank box wine because that was the only thing that could make Ash feel better. She’d make it all better somehow, but she was gone. Ash didn’t know where to go or who to talk to because the only other people who knew them on that level were either Nic or in France.
A blast of cold air nearly sent Ash back inside as they pushed through the door, but they needed to get out of there. They couldn’t apparate, not in the middle of what was now a full blown panic attack, and they didn’t know where the portkeys were (if there even were any). So there they stood, shaking and crying, unable to catch their breath, as the city of New York cheered in the new year.
