blackmagicforever

i do some writing, and read lots of fanfiction | noirmagiks

[itshype]

Yes, the fics where Ilya goes to Shane's game in his jersey are cute and romantic. But why has no one even considered:

[ofcdimi]

Someone needs to write an adult!zuko fic like a historical cdrama.

[avalonjoan]

Not pictured: me, yanking the steering wheel to screech into a parking lot so I could take a pic of this while my sisters and I absolutely lost it upon seeing this truck

[eternalfarnham]

“I’ve managed to resist my cannibalistic instincts and refrain from devouring my wife, but I don’t know how much more I can take. Perhaps looking at my neighbor’s beautiful, blossoming tree will ground me…”

[fleshdyk3]

easily one of my favourite tweets of all time

[flameburst97]

[orcboxer]

it's meee I'm your guardian angel hiiiiii 😇 okay🙏 so. in about six months, you're gonna die of starvation. 🥺 and if I don't protect you, I will get: #fired! 🫢 and that is No Good 🙅‍♀️ hahaaa So. 🙏 I looked into causes of starvation, and it turns out: Your death is totally preventable! 😯 Uh oh! 😆 There's more than enough food to sustain you without interfering with anyone else's survival, but you're not allowed to have it! 🤨 Whaaat? 🤷‍♀️ Apparently, your death is premeditated by thousands of things called "shareholders." So. 🙏 I've been killing people,

[flarerokk]

got bored. drew the unholy quintet again

[omegaverse-anesthesiologist]

why is ao3 is blocked on the hospital wifi????

[omegaverse-anesthesiologist]

It’s not even the public hospital wifi. I’m on the staff wifi. which one of you anesthesiologists was reading omega verse on the clock.

[omegaverse-anesthesiologist]

Thankfully, I am saved by the power of having a total of 7 followers on this blog.

[omegaverse-anesthesiologist]

The power of having a total of 7 followers on this blog has failed me.

[worldheritagepostorganization]

World Heritage Post

[now-you-sound-like-a-jedi]

If Obi-Wan had actually stayed on Mandalore with Satine after the Civil War and left the Jedi Order, it would've made The Phantom Menace and Attack of the Clones peak comedy.

Like, Qui-Gon would still be sent to Naboo and end up on Tatooine, he'd still meet Anakin and take him back to the Temple. But, in this AU, he survives the battle on Theed and takes Anakin as his padawan. And the entire Order would be making jokes:

"Congrats on the new padawan! Hope he sticks around longer than the last one!" "We'll keep this one off the bodyguard missions, eh Qui-Gon?"

So one day little Anakin’s like "hey master, what happened to your last padawan?" And Qui-Gon's like "oh he ran off with a girl, yeah he's royalty in the Outer Rim now".

And it's all fine and dandy until Anakin’s nineteen and they get assigned to protect Padmé, and Qui-Gon takes one look at this kid's face and thinks "You've got to be fucking kidding me, this shit again??"

[happydragon]

@muffinlance how dare you leave this gold in the tags

[now-you-sound-like-a-jedi]

Reblogging for the best fucking thing anyone has ever added to the tags of one of my posts

[impossibleprincess35]

MAYBE THE THIRD WILL BE MARRIED TO THE ORDER HMMM?

I am fucking HOWLING with laughter over here

[kosmogrl]

well well well if those aren't the consequences of my own actions

[the-haiku-bot]

well well well if those

aren’t the consequences

of my own actions

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[allthingswhumpyandangsty]

claim your star

*this is not to shame anybody. if you used to use chatgpt in the past but have stopped, kudos to you, this post still includes you. if you are still using chatgpt, then I guess I can’t stop you — but if you ever decide to stop using it in the future, you may then claim your star too

[allshipsareok]

[zykamiliah-temporal]

i think we should bring this back (with some amendments ofc) if we ever needed an "internet etiquette" for the younger generations, now is the moment to remind them. purity culture kills fandom

as well as the three laws of fandom:

Don't Like, Don't Read (DL;DR), Your Kink is not My Kink And That's OK (YKINMKATO) and Ship and Let Ship

[sorcererofsolitude]

📣 Purity culture kills fandom! 📣

[atlinmerrick]

NO ONE LIVING hasn't been squicked out by something. There's over 7 billion of us, my delights and disgusts aren't universal. So I move on. Don't like the ship? Move on. Don't like____? Move on.

I am not an exception. Neither are you. I don't like it I move on and shut my gob about it because everyone everywhere is squicked out by something and they need to put the thing down and just…motor.

[rewordthis]

This but also:

Frames this entire post and hangs it over the fireplace.

[allthingswhumpyandangsty]

[allthingswhumpyandangsty]

[itssjanedoe]

[s-h-a-s-e]

[goodfriendo]

i wonder what they're gossiping about

[jmawork]

had to draw them

[spacespectrum-deactivated202010]

my armenian father getting angry at a squirrel

[spacespectrum-deactivated202010]

my dad is famous

[alliluyevas]

“You bastard, what are you doing over there?”

*camera zooms in*

“You are STEALING my nuts. Hey. Hey!”

*becoming more strident*

“Are you listening to me?!”

*taps on wall, causing squirrel to startle*

“You. Are. A. Little. Thief.”

[ailithnight]

@stealingyourbones This is what I think of when I read your username.

You are STEALINK my bones.

[sentimentalslut]

what people dont get about divorces is the Whole Thing About Dogs

[sentimentalslut]

i have written custody plans for labrador retrievers more complex than i have for children. i went to four years of undergrad, three years of law school, and sat for the bar exam to write up custody exchange provisions for dogs with hyphonated last names

[sentimentalslut]

my clients are paying $295 an hour for me to go to court and litigate who makes veterinary decisions for Chuckles the Goldfish and theres literally nothing i can do to stop them

[sentimentalslut]

framing these tags and hanging them up in my office to remind me that it can always be worse

[pick-a-number-potato]

why hasn't Felix told Adrien his dad was Monarch?

just a reminder

Felix knows that Gabriel was Monarch. He got the miraculous from Gabriel. Season 6 has only brought up Marinette and Natalie knowing, but Felix does too, and unlike Marinette and Natalie, he would have no immediate consequences from telling Adrien.

(Natalie vould get in legal trouble of trouble with the kingdom, Marinette would 100% get dumped and Paris would likely doubt her ability to be Ladybug if she lied to everyone. Felix has the excuse of being in London a lot of the time and not knowing Ladybug didn't tell him, and he probably wouldn't care if Adrien was a little upset at him as long as he learned the truth.)

[jesuis-melodrama]

Because the plot needs to keep Adrien in the dark and for some reason Félix adores Marinette post-Season 5??? Even though he has first-hand experience in how incompetent she is?? Even though he despises authority?? Even though he barely knows her and would in no way choose a powerful stranger over a family member?? Marinette's plot armour is the ultimate reason.