and the raven that killed them

aries || he/him || a dreamer, more than i am a writer || amateur latin student || XVII

[hwhwgwhnwnwbwbwg-deactivated202]

[brokenbonedcrows]

something in me loves differently than it used to

[brokenbonedcrows]

i will never deserve how good you were to me, and that's okay

[romantisme-noir]

[brokenbonedcrows]

i need to hurt like i need to breathe; i need you like i need a cigarette

[brokenbonedcrows]

she watches me, carefully, like i must be the embodiment of fragility. i despise it.

[brokenbonedcrows]

i surrender to certain kinds of hunger

[brokenbonedcrows]

i wake up in a new life

down by the seaside

down by the seaside

red rock riviera - (british) sea power

[brokenbonedcrows]

i wish to once again exalt across the stage, to forget that my bones are shattered and my skin has fallen off of me, leaving my fascia to rot and hold me in place like vines, like the ribbons of my pointe shoes once around my ankles.

[brokenbonedcrows]

in this earthly hour, surrounded by holier ones, i wait for the clock to tick to the next chapter, for the minute hand to cross the golden XII on my timepiece. i remember, slowly, that my watch is broken, that its gold and and silver fluctuations and thin clock hands are merely a reminder of a deep importance i cannot seem to remember. my gaze falls upon different clocks most days. i reach my dirty hands out to the serenity of the next hour, feeling the loud tick of XII in my bones, shattering my skin away from my skull like a bullet, but there is no gunpowder burn. i am a walking corpse, destined to die again, but not in this hour, nor the next. i will watch other clocks rush past XII, my skeletal aspect paled in the traquility of the peach sunrise and of the death found in life.

[brokenbonedcrows]

an excitement brewed in me, deep in my abdomen. chemicals and medications sloshed in me with every panicked move, with the loss of my mortality, under the drug-induced manic haze, the smell of smoke and the taste of pills. grey mist floating up and around me, as if a barrier from death, or at least the perception of it. void of disgust, void of anguish, full of something delightfully horrifying. new scars, a burning nose, an aching throat.

now lays a pit. a sobering helplessness, a staggering decision already made but never thought about, at least not in words. my mortality handed back to me, thrown in my face, my skin unchanged and my throat unhealed. i can run my hands along the ridges in my skin, feel my breath scrape across my trachea and start a fire in my nostrils, but i can never reach down my esophagus and fill the abyss in my stomach with my tired two hands. my eyes will close soon.

[brokenbonedcrows]

life may not be fair to me but i pray she shows you mercy instead

[brokenbonedcrows]

in her room, she kneeled over me, passionate reverberations shaking my soul from the mere look in her eyes.

she leaned over and kissed my neck. it was the most breathtaking thing i had ever felt, perhaps the only thing i ever felt at all.

but a confusion, a fear plagued the need to close any distance between her lips and my flesh. i pushed her off of me.

she kissed my lips many times after that. it was wet, unpracticed, it left bruises and messy hair.

she kissed my body. from my legs all the way up to my collarbones, stark pale in the darkness of her room and against her tanned, texan skin, skipping over my throat to make her way to my lips once again.

in secret i begged her to kiss my neck again. to leave traces of her desire everywhere on the young, frightened skin around my throat where my words caught and my too-loud breaths escaped.

she never did.

[soft-lovely]

libraries should be open all night

[brokenbonedcrows]

correspond to me, fall unto me, crawl into me

[brokenbonedcrows]

i sit

at my desk, on my bed, in the woods, on old dying swings

i'm not sure where i sit

not sure of where i stand

i am a window that looks out to the forest

myself, maybe, sitting in the centre

and so the eagle flies

i watch it, wishing it was a hawk

but only the eagle flies.

[studyblr]

how to learn new content and never forget it

save this for your next academic year and finals, and it’ll save your grades and time.

1. whenever you read a paragraph with new content, close the book/look away and ask yourself: “what have i just learned?” explaining the concept to yourself right away and asking follow-up questions will change the way you retain new material forever.

2. at first, it’ll be daunting, and it’ll be pretty hard to actually bring yourself to do this. trust me, it’ll be worth it - as this is scientifically proven one of the most effective study techniques.

3. to try this out, set yourself a timer for how long you estimate learning a concept might take. now take away 20% from that estimate. you won’t be able to reach this goal with basic highlighting and re-reading techniques - but with active recall, you will.

4. once you’ve understood the concept, use spaced repetition systems like anki flashcards to force yourself to retrieve this information in a set period of time. this way, your brain will always be reminded of this concept before it could possibly forget it.

5. teach it to others as much as you can. as with the old wisdom “see one, do one, teach one”, one of the only guarantees you’ve really gotten something is when you can effectively teach it.

hope these are helpful for you!!

more content like this on my instagram, @softmedstudent