Hey Eve! Iāve been missing the TikTok fico (but I still love everything you post because youāre my favorite fic writer š) I was wondering if you would write the Lions doing the TikTok trend where theyāre like ātheyāre a 7 butā¦ā or ātheyāre a 2 butā¦ā if you have the chance?
Oh this trend is so fun! I miss these fics too! SW character credit goes to @lumosinlove ā¤ļø
āOkay, okay, wait,ā Nado said through his laughter as he took the phone from Kuny. āTheyāre a six, but theyāre a goalie.ā
āInstant ten,ā Finn said immediately.
āThanks, Harz!ā Kasey called offscreen.
āNot you!ā Finn shook his head. āUh, theyāre an eight, but they put their right skate on before their left.ā
āOh, tough one,ā Remus mused. āEight and a half?ā
āTen,ā Sirius answered. āI do that.ā
āSo that makes my vote a solid five.ā Logan grinned as Finn passed him the phone; he dodged Siriusā punch to his shoulder by less than an inch, then winced at the following smack upside the head. āThatās an abuse of power, asshole!ā
āBite me.ā
Logan pulled a face at him before turning back to the camera. āTheyāre a five, but they play for the Snakes.ā
āZero,ā several voices said in unison.
āCap, your brother played for them. Be nice.ā
Sirius frowned. āNegative one.ā
āYou literally look the same.ā
Leo snorted as he took the phone. āBold of you to assume anyone on that team is above a three. Okay, theyāre a five, but they use a stick with the same flex as you do.ā
A moment of quiet contemplation passed through the group. āNine,ā James finally answered. āI took a point off because I donāt like to share my sticks, butā¦ thatās hot.ā
āUm, theyāre a nine, butā¦ā Kasey bit his lower lip in thought, then grinned. āBut they dress exclusively in khakis and polo shirts for seven years.ā
āTen,ā Sirius answered without hesitation at the same time Remus said, āfuck you.ā
āYouāre only giving Loops a nine?ā Talker whistled lowly. āDamn, Bliz, harsh grade. Theyāre a six, but they drink blue Gatorade.ā
āOh, hell yeah!ā James whooped. āThatās an eleven, baby!ā
āDefinitely at least an eight,ā Olli said with a nod. āTheyāre a seven, but they have red hair.ā
āTen,ā James, Leo, and Logan chorused. Finn gave the camera a pleased look while Olli handed the phone to Dumo.
āI just say how attractive someone is, then something that makes them more attractive, yes?ā he asked. Various agreements came from offscreen and he hummed in thought. āWhatās the grading scale?ā
āA ten is someone very attractive,ā Sirius explained. āSo for example, Remus would be a ten. And then at the bottom is a one, like Tremzyāow.ā
āAnd so Celeste would be an eleven?ā Dumo continued mildly.
āSureāstop hitting me!ā
āDāaccord. Ah, theyāre an eight, but they can bake madeleines.ā
āTen.ā
āWhatās a madeleine?ā
Kuny rolled his eyes. āIs cookie, Cookie. You should know. Hmm. They are seven, but have strong muscles. Before you speak, only correct answer is ten.ā
The newest Lion (i.e. Kota) accidentally walking in on a Cap/Loops steamy makeout sesh. š
Ope sorry Kota. No explicit Vaincre spoilers here! Character credit goes to @lumosinlove ā¤ļø
Kota poked his head into the locker room and breathed a sigh of relief when he found it entirely empty. No bags, no music, no teammates still navigating that awkward line between āwelcome to the teamā and āI hate your fucking gutsā, a line that had seemed to trap even the most positive players. Kasey was still nice, at least. Kota had missed their shared dry humor.
He gave the captainās stall a wide berth as he passed despite being aloneāas hard as Black was trying to be welcoming, Kota didnāt want to push his luck by messing up his stuff. The guy was superstitious as all hell. Heād probably notice if his jersey had been breathed on by the wrong person, and the last thing Kota needed was the captain crushing him into a grease spot with those massive arms and perma-scowl. The goal of his first season on the Lions was pure fucking survival.
He left his duffel on his bench and stretched, basking in the peace and quiet. Nobody was staring at him. Nobodyās silent judgment prickled his neck. Nobody was wandering around mostly naked and talking at the same time. Kota had been the subject of many chirps for his general embarrassment around naked people, but he figured he got a pass when those naked people were strangers. It wasnāt the goddamn YMCAāwould it kill them to put underwear on now and then? OāHaraās ass was permanently burned into his memory.
His ankle crackled as he rolled it out and he wrinkled his nose before trying again. Easy peasy, lemon squeezy. Perfect form would be the name of the game as he tried to earn the Lionsā respect. Anyone could score a goal. He needed to stand out just enough to ease the hatred into at least ignoring him.
Kota took another minute to limber up before wandering out of the locker room with a yawn. It wasnāt that early, but he had stayed up late enough that he could feel it lingering in the back of his head. The quiet rink with its lack of blaring, chattering noise almost made him more drowsy, and he stuck his hands in his hoodie pocket while he headed down the nearest hall. The floor plan wasnāt hard to rememberāPT offices, Coachās office, break roomā¦
The break room didnāt sound too bad. A cup of coffee might even do him some good, shake off that sleepiness. From the rustling sounds he could hear inside, the nutritionist had probably arrived already. Maybe he could ask for some pointers. Maybe he could make a friend. Down the hall, something clattered, and Kota looked toward it as he reached blindly for the doorknob and pulled the door open.
A broom smacked him dead in the forehead. It was the third most surprising thing he found.
A strange sense of frozen calm came over him, then. There was simply no emotion to describe hisā¦ shock? Horror? Bafflement? Hysterical amusement?
Remus Lupinās throat bobbed in a hard swallow, eyes wide like a deer in headlights. He licked his swollen lips and his cheeks grew even redder than before as he slowly straightened and pulled the captaināThe Captain Sirius Black, Hockey Legendāup with him from where he had dipped The Captain Sirius Black, presumably to kiss him stupid.
Oh, yeah, somebody had definitely been kissed stupid. Captain Sirius Black looked even more rumpled, even more flushed, and even more embarrassed before a mask of total neutrality came down over his face. āKota,ā he acknowledged, clearing his throat and extracting Lupinās hand from under his shirt.
Kota decided to be nice and not mention the hand still on his ass. āCaptain.ā
āYouāre here early.ā Lupin gave a brisk nod, wiping his palms on his pants. āGood habit.ā
āI try.ā
āAre we in the way?ā
It was a true talent that Black could keep that poker face with at least three moderate hickeys in Kotaās direct eyeline. āNo,ā Kota said after a moment. āNo, not at all. I wasāI was looking for the break room.ā
āNext door,ā Lupin corrected.
āYeah, I figured. I should probably go now.ā
Lupin nodded. The Captain remained statue-still. āProbably.ā
āGood morning.ā
āMorning.ā
āIām justāā Kota made a vague gesture toward the break room as equal parts mortification and hilarity battled in his stomach. āIām gonna go? Uh, have fun?ā
He regretted every single second of arriving early as he moved three feet down the hall. Even OāHaraās bare ass would be a welcome replacement for The Captain Sirius Blackās freshly-flushed cheeks from what he assumed was a rather charged morning routine.
ā
āKota.ā The post-practice conversation buzz dissipated like mist in the sun.
Fuck me. āYes?ā
The captain jerked his head toward the ice room and Kota prayed for a swift death. Then again, it was a little hard to take those biceps seriously when he had seen them flung around Lupinās neck not four hours earlier. The captain turned to him with flinty eyes when the door swung shut behind them and all of Kotaās momentary faith in his mortality withered. āIām sorry.ā
Kota blinked. āYouā¦what?ā
āIām sorry,ā Black repeated. His ears were red at the tops and he coughed lightly. āThe events of this morning were extremely unprofessional and I would like to apologize for any discomfort you felt.ā
āOh, itās fine,ā Kota said, feeling rather faint.
āAs you know, personal relationships have no effect on gameplay or any related aspects of the team. This morning was a lapse in judgment and it wonāt happen again.ā
How the fuck am I supposed to respond to that? āI donāt really care if you make out with your boyfriend,ā Kota blurted.
Blackās eyebrows shot up and Kota considered laying on the floor to accelerate the grease spot process. āPardon?ā
āIāā You fucking moron what the hellā āFull support, you know? Your business is your business. Iām an ally. I was here early, it was my fault. You guys can do whatever, whenever.ā
āAn ally,ā Black repeated slowly.
Kotaās ribs felt like they were compressing all his internal organs. āA hundred percent.ā
āYou do know thatās not really what I was worried about, yes?ā
āMhmm,ā he managed. Black looked at him expectantly. āI appreciate the apology. It wasnāt necessary, but it wasā¦you know. Nice.ā
āIām working on it.ā The awkward silence stretched for another few moments. āWe can go back in now, unless you want to talkāā
āNo, no, going in sounds good.ā The words rushed out of Kota at the same rate his feet carried him back to the door: the speed of light itself. He hoped the burning sensation in his face wasnāt visible to the rest of the team. If it wasā¦well, the āignoringā stage couldnāt come fast enough.
Heās SO STUPID BUT ALSO HE WENT BACK BUT ALSO LIKE PLEASE THE GREASE PAINTS MADE ME CACKLE. LIKE ED PLEASE YOU LOOK LIKE YOURE GOING THROUGH YOUR EMO PHASE
(Also Izzy has every kink under the sun and you canāt prove me wrong)
