It was a huge part of my life even though I'm not in the fandom anymore. I wrote for years, contributed a lot to the fandom, made some great friends and had a good time.
Now, years later and no longer really interested in TWD, this blog is just full of cobwebs.
I've considered deleting it several times, wondering what the point in keeping it is. But then everytime I think about it, I still get notes from things I posted years ago.
I considered it again today. I figured since all my work is on AO3 that it didn't really matter anyway, but I was getting notes all day and it made me reconsider.
The thing that's bothered me most is that a couple of years ago, Tumblr fucked all of my work up. So many fics have zero formatting which makes them horrific to read and makes new readers think I'm incapable of writing (I'm not lmao). Other fics have the text entirely deleted and I have no idea why or how. It's bothered me so much that it's fueled the thought of just deleting this blog so many times.
I've decided to try and fix the formatting on my work. I'm just gonna try and redo it all and the ones completely missing I'll copy from AO3.
The thing is, I did try to fix the formatting as soon as I noticed it had gone wonky years ago and it didn't work. So I guess I'll leave it up to fate.
If I can fix it and make it readable then I'll keep the blog, if not I'll probably get rid of it soon.
After Daryl left to hunt, Rosalie went inside and sat against the wall, putting the baby back down on his little clothes mattress so she didn't wake him. She glanced around at everyone just talking, some cleaning their weapons. Carl and Rick were sat with Judith as the younger boy was making her laugh. They were all a real family, and it was strange to her. She couldn't remember the last time she was with a group of people like this. She was only in one group before, right at the start of all this, and they were nothing like this. They fought constantly, it was what cost them their lives in the end. She thought back to Daryl. He was strangely easy to talk to and she wondered if maybe they’d become friends. She frowned at even thinking such a thing. She was planning on leaving the group at some point, she couldn't afford to have friends. She wasn't sure why it made her chest ache to think about leaving now. To go back to being alone, just her and the baby.
She jumped a little when Maggie suddenly sat in front of her, looking sheepish and awkward.
“I just wanted to apologise for takin’ Jacob before,” she said softly. The new name the boy seemed to have acquired made Rosalie clench her jaw as she looked at the woman. She knew they probably weren't aware that she hated the name, hated the fact they had taken it upon themselves to name her baby. She hadn't really spoken up about it, for fear she would blow her lid at them. She’d always had a temper, she’d inherited it off her father. She had problems controlling it before the turn and ended up in a fuck tonne of trouble because of it. It only seemed to get worse now, she was less trustful than before and more easy to anger. This group was kind enough to take her in, to help care for the baby, and she felt like she was constantly trying her hardest to keep herself in check with them. She found it easier to just keep her mouth shut. If she didn't speak she couldn't upset anyone with her attitude.
“We didn’t mean to upset you, we didn't really think. We just thought after all you went through you could have used the rest...We do it with Judith all the time, we all chip in and just look after her. We didn't think about the fact you haven't had that before, so I’m sorry. It won't happen again.” she looked sincere and Rosalie could see her point, it made sense. They were used to all taking care of the baby from their group and she was glad the woman was apologizing and explaining herself, it made her feel a little less murdery.
“It’s okay, I just panicked. I guess I still have some adjusting to do,” she replied, picking at her nails. Talking to people wasn't something she enjoyed and she felt extremely rusty after so long alone. Except with Daryl for some reason she mused.
“I get it, we all do. We shouldn't have just assumed you’d be okay with us doin’ that. You only met us yesterday and it was wrong to assume you'd trust him to strangers like that,” she smiled sheepishly. Rosalie found herself liking Maggie. She knew it took a lot to come and talk to her, and she respected that.
“Thanks Maggie,” she smiled, nodding a little. Letting the woman know that it was water under the bridge now. She would really have to get used to people wanting to help her. She didn't think she’d ever get used to it.
A few hours passed by. Rosalie had a nap and when the boy woke, she woke too and ended up sitting with him on her knee. Carl had come over with Judith and the babies were babbling to each other, much to everyone's amusement. It was like they were having a conversation in their own little language. The door to the cabin opened and she flinched, head whipping to the door. She shouldn't have been too surprised to see Daryl. The people on watch would have noticed if it was someone else. His eyes scanned the area like he was looking for someone until they fell on her and he gave her a small nod, making her return it. She noticed he had about 5 squirrels and 1 rabbit attached to him and she couldn't help but smile at his successful hunt. People were fawning over him and he looked so uncomfortable she almost snorted. They were very much alike. Carol offered to take the meat to prep it so she and Maggie would cook it. Rosalie felt like offering her help but the baby in her lap was more important. Carl had left with Judith on Daryl's return so she sat on her own, her knees up and the boy facing her against her belly as he toyed with her necklace.
She heard Daryl's boots before she saw him and he sat down next to her, his hand darting out and tickling the little boy's belly and making him laugh a little. She glanced at Daryl with a smile.
“You're like a hero with all that food,” she smirked, knowing he felt uncomfortable.
“Stop,” he huffed and shook his head playfully, making her laugh quietly. The pair watched Abraham go to Carol and whistle loudly at all the meat.
“Gonna have a feast tonight!” he grinned happily, looking over at Daryl.
“Shouldn't we ration it?” Rosalie felt like her voice was much louder than intended and it was as if silence descended on the cabin as everyone looked at her. She tensed a little feeling like she stuck her nose in where it wasn't wanted.
“Yeah, ain’t sure when we’ll be able to get more. ’Specially since we’re leavin’ in a few days,” Daryl replied, saving her from her embarrassment. Rick looked over and nodded with a smile. She was right, they did need to ration it, they'd need to stretch it as far as they could for the road. Everyone started milling about again and the silence turned into chatter once more.
“Shit, that was awkward, didn't mean to say that so loud,” she whispered to Daryl. He snorted and looked at her.
“Nah, yer right. Yer allowed to voice yer opinion ya know, ain’t nobody gon’ bite ya,” he smirked, making her mock glare at him. Michonne was stood across the cabin watching the pair with a slight smile playing on her lips. She nudged Rick with her foot and nodded her head towards the pair.
“Except the dead ones obviously,” Rosalie replied, making Daryl huff a laugh at her and shake his head. He continued to tickle the baby and make him laugh. Rick and Michonne shared a knowing look between them. They couldn't remember seeing Daryl like this. It had been a long while since he had even smiled and he seemed so at ease with this girl and the baby.
The boy took Daryl's hand in his mouth and started gnawing at him with his very few tiny teeth.
“Hey now, Tiny, ain’t no damn meal,” He snorted a little, making Rosalie look at him with a look he couldn't quite read.
“What?” he asked curiously, his brow furrowing a little thinking he’d done something wrong.
“Nothing, it’s just...you called him Tiny,” she replied softly, blinking at him with her large blue eyes. He looked down, the tips of his ears going pink but successfully hiding behind his hair.
“What ya called ‘im ain’t it?” he asked gruffly, feeling self-conscious about it.
“Yeah, but everyone else calls him Jacob now,” she huffed a little, looking back at the boy. Daryl glanced at her for a moment, He already knew she didn't like the idea of people naming the boy. It wasn't just the fact she didn't want to name him because she was scared, but he could tell the issue was also the fact others had named him, not her.
“They can call ‘im what they want, he’s still Tiny,” he said softly, quirking his mouth up just slightly when she looked at him. She smiled gratefully at him, how he seemed to just get her. Seemed to not think she was stupid for all the weird hang-ups she had about the little kid in her lap. He didn't seem to judge her at all, and it made her feel at ease with him.
Most of the day passed by uneventful. They’d sat and ate the food, chatting away casually and making plans on where to go next. Rosalie hadn't said anything, she didn't feel like it was her place despite what Daryl said. Their plans seemed decent enough that she didn't feel the need to veto them so she just sat there relaxing. Daryl had stayed by her side most of the time. Whenever he got up to look around or talk to someone, he ended up coming back and sitting with her. She was grateful, she felt at ease around him and made her feel less on edge. They didn't talk much, that's what she liked most about him. He didn't feel the need to make small talk and she knew it wasn't just for her benefit, he didn't seem the type to just talk for no reason, to fill the silence. At some point, the baby had gone to sleep and she settled him back down on the mattress as she leant against the wall. She was starting to feel restless and antsy. She never really stayed in one place for too long so she could avoid people, but now she was willingly in a tiny space full of people and she felt like she was crawling out of her skin. She was toying with her necklace and fidgeting to no end until Daryl huffed and gave her a side glance.
“Jesus woman, quit ya fidgetin’ ‘fore I damn well sit on ya,” he grumped at her. She turned to look at him and arched a brow at him looking amused. The image of Daryl sitting on her to keep her still running through her mind. He rolled his eyes and snorted slightly, shaking his head before looking at her again, almost expectantly like he was waiting for her to explain herself.
“I just feel on edge, being cooped up in here with all these people,” she said softly, trying to keep her voice down so she didn't sound like a grade-A bitch. Daryl nodded a little, once again understanding her. He remembered back in the prison, He often felt like he was going out of his damn mind and itching to go and hunt, just to get out and get away from everyone. He imagined it was much worse for her since she’d been alone for so long.
He scratched the scruff on his chin thoughtfully for a moment and Rosalie just looked out and watched people doing their thing.
“Should come hunt with me tomorrow mornin’,” he suggested, making her look at him. He wasn't looking at her, he felt a little awkward asking her along. Daryl never invited anyone with him. Sometimes Rick came without invitation but the man sounded like a damn elephant, his stomping scaring off any chance of food, and in the end Daryl told him he was banned from coming again. He knew Rosalie would be different though. She’d already said she was good at hunting, and he knew she wasn't the type to brag. If she admitted to being good at it, he had no doubt she would be. He was also desperate to get his fix of being alone with her, the sweet relief she brought him from his crushing guilt and grief. Being inside with her and the others felt different than when they were alone on the porch, and although sitting with her eased him somewhat, he felt like an addict needing to get his next fix off her. Needing some time with just her so he just forget all the bad shit that had happened to him and his family.
She was silent and for some reason he started to feel nervous, chancing a glance at her and seeing her looking to her side, watching the baby. He knew her apprehension and he felt like it wasn't his place to try and push her into leaving the baby with someone here just so she would come along with him. But he was desperate for her to come with him. He was about to try and plead his case to her like a pathetic needy asshole but she spoke up first.
“Do you think Maggie would mind looking after him if we go?” she asked quietly, a slightly nervous and unsure tone to her voice. He felt relief sweep through him and nodded, trying not to seem as eager as he felt.
“Yeah, sure she’d love to. I’ll ask her about it later,” he replied, chewing his lower lip a little. He knew it was a big step for her, especially after this morning and the shit Maggie and Carol had pulled on her, but he felt like it was a step in the right direction. If she would trust them with the boy, it was a good thing and he hoped it meant that maybe she would actually stick around for a while.
Before long, night had descended on them and she went to sleep, almost excited about going out and being free once again. She was so used to being out there she felt at home, in her element. In here with everyone, she felt out of sorts and she didn't like it. She was nervous about leaving the boy, but she knew Maggie cared about him, and after her apology and explanation, she felt like she could trust her with him. She knew she would still be anxious to be away from him, but she was also looking forward to some respite as a carer. For the last two months, she’d been the only one to look after him and it had been hard for her. She didn't know the first thing about babies and she was so out of her depth. Maybe some time alone would help her.
She felt a little weird that Daryl had asked her to come. She knew he didn't need any help with hunting and he had only asked her since he found out she felt like a caged animal in here. It was strange to have someone willing to help her, to want to do something nice. And something told her that Daryl didn't invite people hunting with him often. Part of her felt good about it, like she had made a friend, someone who seemed to understand her and never seemed to judge her. He just accepted her and her issues and still stuck by her side. The other part of her though felt weird and guilty, since she was still planning on leaving the group. She felt like it was making her weak but starting to enjoy his company, but she couldn't help it, she just felt that way around him.
I’d love to know what you guys think of this story so far.
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Rosalie woke only a few hours later when she heard a quiet murmur of conversation behind her. She kept her eyes shut and breathing slow as not to alert anyone she had woken up.
“How do we know we can trust her?” it sounded like the redhead, Abraham spoke. She almost snorted. They shouldn't trust her, they shouldn’t trust anyone in this godforsaken world.
“Ain’t give us no reason not to,” Daryl huffed. She noticed he was still next to her, her back was almost touching his side and she could feel the warmth radiating off him.
“For all we know she could try to kill us in our sleep,” Abraham said coldly. She felt Daryl tense a little beside her.
“She’s outmanned and outgunned, with a damn baby. She ain’t stupid,” she could almost hear him rolling his eyes. And he was right, she wasn't stupid. She wouldn’t try anything like that, especially not when they were helping with the baby when she so desperately needed it. Abraham huffed and it fell silent, the only noise were others snores or shuffling as people not on watch got ready to settle in and get some shut-eye. Rosalie wondered why Daryl was sticking up for her. The only time they spoke was when he patched up her arm, but she was good at reading people, and she knew Daryl was too. She couldn't help but wonder what exactly Daryl saw in her that made him trust her, to defend her.
She fell back to sleep easily and when she woke again, it was light outside. She sat up and stretched, wincing at the stitches pulling. Her body still ached like a bitch from how she had to overexert herself the day before, but the rest had done her a lot of good. She glanced down to check on the boy and her heart stopped beating when she saw he wasn't there. The makeshift mattress empty. Her breathing became laboured as she scrambled to her feet, head whipping around to look for him, but she couldn't see him with anyone. The movement woke Daryl, who she didn't notice had slept next to her, but not too close. He sat up quickly, looking at her concerned as she looked on the verge of a panic attack. He got to his feet and gently gripped the top of her arms.
“Hey, s’alright. What is it?” he asked, his voice was thick from sleep, glancing around trying to figure out what had upset her, maybe a bad dream? He wouldn't blame her.
Then he saw it. The baby was gone, and his eyebrows rose as he looked around himself confused, still holding the girl who was struggling to breathe. It wasn't his business, yet he found himself irritated that someone had taken the boy. He knew his family meant no harm by it. He most likely woke up and they wanted to let the girl rest, but he knew she wouldn't see it like that. She didn't feel part of the group, she’d been with them a day. If he and Judith were with a new group for a day, he’d fucking kick some major ass if someone pulled this shit on him.
Rosalie's heart was thumping in her chest and she couldn't seem to get her brain to work with the lack of oxygen. Her eyes frantically scanned the area for the boy and came up with nothing. She barely registered when Daryl had spoken to her or the grip he had on her arms. She looked up at him, blinking slowly as her breathing slowed down slightly, the oxygen returning to her brain. It was like something snapped. The look she gave him was murderous, and he knew right a-fucking-way that shit was about to go down if he didn’t contain it. He couldn't risk his family being hurt over a misunderstanding. He also didn't want the girl to get hurt or even left behind when she and the baby needed their help, he knew he had to fix this. He wouldn't lie and say he wasn't a little scared. He’d seen what the tiny thing was fucking capable of when she was pissed off, and he had no intention of getting his head chopped off. It took a lot to scare Daryl Dixon, yet he was looking at an angel-faced feral woman who made his balls shrink and try to climb back up into his body with a single look.
He glanced around nervously as she looked like she was about to scream bloody murder, and he dragged her quickly into the kitchen area that was unoccupied.
“Where is he?” He honestly expected her to shout, scream, hit him maybe a little, but her low growl of a tone was far more unsettling than all of those combined.
“I dunno, but he's safe alright? He probably woke and maybe Maggie or Carol took ‘im so ya could sleep,” he offered, his voice low and trying to be calming. He knew he was no fucking Rick Grimes when it came to this shit but he hoped she would listen. Rosalie squinted a little at him, gritting her teeth as she tried so hard not to clock him around the head. Deep down she knew that no harm was being done to the boy, they all seemed to dote on him and oddly enough, she trusted at least Rick and Daryl to know they wouldn't let any harm come to him. But she was still pissed. He was hers, maybe not technically but he was more hers than these assholes and they just fucking took him.
Daryl watched her as she breathed deeply and he had no doubt she was refraining from throttling him, but it was something and he’d fucking take it.
“I know it ain’t right, and I’ll talk to ‘em. He’s yours and they shouldn’t have taken ‘im. But he’s safe, I promise,” he soothed, watching as she relaxed ever so slightly. She looked up at him and gave him a chilling glare, making him swallow thickly.
“You better hope for your sake he is,” she growled, clenching her fists. He had placated her enough by agreeing with her that they shouldn't have taken him, gave her some semblance of comfort with knowing she had a right to be pissed off. He was a smart man indeed that Daryl Dixon and she wondered if he meant his words or said it just to calm her down. Either way, she had calmed down enough that she wouldn't maim the asshole who had taken the boy.
He eyed her cautiously to see if she had calmed down enough, and when he was satisfied he gave her a slight nod. He led her out of the kitchen and Rick looked over curiously. If he didn't know any better he would have thought the pair had a sneaky rendezvous in the kitchen, with the girls flushed cheeks and heaving chest and Daryl looking like he didn't know what to do with himself. But he did know better, he knew Daryl enough to know he wasn't the kind of guy to have a quicky in the kitchen with people around. Daryl hadn't been with anyone since Rick had known him.
“Everything alright?” Rick asked with a warm smile as he walked over and glanced between the two. Rosalie looked like she was barely containing her anger and shot Daryl a look. Daryl knew she was expecting him to tell him, since if she did all hell would break loose. He was glad she was giving him the chance.
“The boys gone, where is he?” he asked gruffly before chewing his lower lip. Realisation dawned on Ricks features as he glanced at the girl again, he felt bad that she had worried.
“Look, I said it wasn't a good idea... but Maggie and Carol didn't seem to agree with me. They're out on the porch with him. They gave him breakfast and said you needed to rest,” Rick grimaced. When Maggie had suggested it, Rick told her right up it was a bad idea, but Carol had disagreed and the women took the boy and went out on the porch. He saw Rosalie take a deep breath, she was relieved he was safe but she was still pissed.
Just as Daryl was about to go out to get the baby, Maggie and Carol walked in chatting and smiling at the little boy who was perched on Maggie’s hip. The sight made Rosalie bristle. She hated how she was reacting, it was making it clear that leaving the boy here wasn't going to be an option. It was making her feel all kinds of jealous seeing the baby smiling up at the women. She went to take a step forward, half a mind to set the place ablaze with her wrath, but Daryl marched forwards, taking the baby into his own arms as he glared at them.
“The hell were ya thinkin’ just takin’ ‘im like that? Ya think she wouldn't’ be worried?” he hissed, scowling something fierce. Maggie blanched as she glanced at Rosalie staring daggers at her and Carol rolled her eyes a little.
“We thought she could use the rest, we were only outside,” she huffed a little impatiently, not happy with Daryl's tone.
“How the fuck she supposed to know where ya are huh? Soon as she wakes and the boys gone?” he asked, giving her a pointed look before turning on his heel. Carol did feel bad after that. She didn't really think much about it, about how it had just been the girl and baby for two months and how she'd worry as soon as she saw he was gone.
Daryl walked over to Rosalie and handed the baby over to her. His mouth quirked up a little when he saw the baby babbling and patting her face. She was like a different woman to a few seconds ago, all rage dispersed as she smiled down at the little boy. It was plainly obvious she loved the boy, even if she tried hard to distance herself. She bounced him on her hip a little and he laughed lightly, making her grin. She looked up at Daryl, swallowing thickly as she felt a little bad that he'd had to handle her like that. Like a bomb about to go off. But she knew he got it, the things he’d said to his family, he understood and he didn't judge her for acting the way she had, and it made her feel a little better.
“Thank you, Daryl,” she said softly, the slightest smile on her face. A stark contrast to the murderous glare and growling woman he was dealing with just seconds before. He’d only ever seen her smile to the baby so he felt a little honoured she’d bothered to grace him with one, even if it was barely there. He gave her a nod and chewed his thumb, glancing down at the baby.
“S’nothin’,” he started to feel uncomfortable about the whole thing. He never really liked big deals made out of nothing, but he knew to her it wasn't nothing. He didn't know why he seemed to just get her so well.
The awkward need to talk further was luckily faltered by Rick speaking up.
“Alright everyone, I’ve been thinking about it, and I think we should stay here for a few more days. Rest up and try to catch some food, get our energy back up before we head back out,” he said as he glanced at everyone. Everyone nodded and murmured in agreement and that was that. Rosalie knew she was right in her assessment that Rick was a leader, and from what she had seen so far, he was a good one. She wasn't used to being in a group and being told what to do, but she trusted Rick enough that she would follow him. At least for now until she was back on her feet. At this point honestly, she didn't have any inclination to stay with them forever. The idea of leaving the boy with them was floating further and further away from her mind each time she saw someone else with him. It made her chest ache in a way she wasn't familiar with, but she knew she didn't like it.
In the middle of Rick's speech, Daryl had moved to stand nearer the leader and Rosalie went to sit down against the wall. It felt so strange to her to feel somewhat safe here. Knowing there were others looking out for her. It was the only plus to being in a group, but she still felt weirdly uncomfortable. She was grateful for the rest here, some respite she really fucking needed, and some food for the boy. It made her feel a little less guilty. After some dry crackers and water for breakfast, people were just chatting or milling about as she sat there. She was feeling antsy, she wasn't used to all this, wasn't used to so many people, all the noise. She slipped out onto the porch, silence finally settling her as she sat on the porch swing with the boy. He was tired and she smiled down at him, stroking his dark hair softly as she watched his eyes close as he finally slipped off into a sleep.
She sat on the porch swing for a little bit, letting it sway just slightly as she looked out into the forest. She wasn't sure how safe it would be here and she wondered if Rick's plan for a few days would actually be a good idea. It seemed like there were way too many ways the dead ones could come and get them, or people. The whole cabin was just surrounded by forest and she wasn't sure if even the people on watch would know before it was too late.
She was broken from her thoughts by the front door opening and closing. She looked up and saw Daryl with his bow over his shoulder. He saw her and made his way over, leaning on the railing in front of her as he watched the sleeping boy. Daryl had never really cared much for babies before the turn, but Judith had well and truly melted the man's heart. It was strange to see a woman who was clearly capable of a lot of things, cradling the baby gently, looking at him with nothing but love in her eyes. When she glanced up at Daryl, he felt awkward, nervous, he wasn't quite sure, but he nibbled on his thumb and looked down before glancing at her through his hair.
“I uh...I spoke to ‘em again. Won’t just take ‘im without ya permission,” he said with a slight nod, his voice low and gravelly. Rosalie blinked at him for a moment before nodding.
“I know you don’t want to hear it, but thanks again,” she said softly, watching the man curiously. She knew he just wanted to bolt and run into the forest, he didn't want to be here feeling uncomfortable. He snorted a little, it seemed she could read him just as well as he had been able to read her. He wasn't too surprised since she was the same in that regard. He’d seen how uncomfortable she was the night before when everyone was thanking her for the squirrel meat.
“Told ya before, s’nothin’,” he replied, looking at his shoes.
“That’s bullshit and you know it. I was about ready to rip someone's throat out in there and you talked me down. Shit, I thought Rick was law enforcement, not you,” she said looking amused. He found he liked her being like this with him, teasing and playful rather than looking like she was about to shiv him. He scoffed a laugh at her and shook his head. His permanent scowl gone, making him look younger.
“How the fuck d’ya know Rick was a cop?” he asked her incredulously, genuinely curious how she'd figured that out.
“I’ve had enough dealings with pigs to know one when I hear one,” she smirked, making him bark out a laugh at her. She almost reminded him of Merle with those words. For some reason, it seemed so easy talking to her. Like he could forget all the shit that had happened, the losses suffered. He couldn't remember the last time he’d actually laughed.
“Uh-huh, get yourself arrested a lot?” he asked, teasing right back with a slight smirk and a mischievous glint in his eyes. She gave him a fake scowl and huffed.
“Not a lot, only like...20 or so times,” she replied, trying to keep a straight face. He shook his head at her with a slight smile, and she found herself smiling back. She had no idea what the fuck was going on with her. She never found it easy socializing before the world went to hell in a handbasket, never mind after.
A silence settled between the pair of them but it wasn't uncomfortable. They didn't need to make small talk, they both found it companionable. After a moment of stroking the boy's hair, Rosalie looked back to Daryl.
“Going hunting?” she asked curiously, glancing at the bow slung over his shoulder. He chewed his lower lip and gave her a nod.
“Yeah. Rick wants to see if we can find some food. Ain’t been much recently, think the walkers been eaten’ ‘em all,” he sighed as he glanced out at the forest surrounding them. Any time he came back without food for the group, he felt like a fucking failure. It was his job to go and provide food for them, and he hated coming back empty-handed.
“I’d offer to come, I’m not too bad at hunting, but…” she didn't need to finish her sentence as she looked at the sleeping boy in her arms. She didn't want to bring him unless it was necessary, after all this time of him being in danger. And he knew after this morning she didn't feel comfortable leaving him with his group. He didn't really blame her, it wasn't the best way to earn the girls trust. He found himself peeved at Maggie and Carol. He would have liked the girl to come. He was curious to watch her in action out there. He knew she had to be decent at hunting for her to have made it this long. He also seemed to really enjoy her company.
He loved his family more than anything, and he knew they loved him. They knew him like no one else did. He’d been through hell and back with them. But he couldn't help but need reprieve from them sometimes. Every time he looked at them, he was reminded of his failings, all the blood on his hands. They didn't blame him. They told him they didn't, but he blamed himself. And now when he was with them, he found himself haunted by the ones they lost along the way, the ones who he felt he had failed. And Beth, fucking Beth. He’d never been that close to her before the fall of the prison when he was forced to be with her, lost her, found her again and then watched her die. It ripped his black heart to shreds. She was like the little sister he never fucking asked for but so desperately needed. The light in the very bleak new world. Now she was gone, and it was all on him.
But this girl, she didn't have any ghosts coming to haunt him. She was just there. She was brave and ferocious, yet soft and gentle all wrapped in one pretty package. And Daryl found it relieving talking to her. To be around someone that didn't leave him feeling guilty or like a failure. He was shocked at himself with how easy he could read her, how easy he could talk to her. He was almost positive this morning he wouldn't be able to talk her down. He wasn’t like Rick in that way, he didn't have that diplomatic touch to him. He was rough around the edges and more often than not, he rubbed people the wrong way. But Rosalie had responded to him. Hell she even thanked him afterwards, and in a weird way it made him feel a little proud he had been the one to do that. Like he had some kind of connection that was starting between them.
He didn't know just how much he had needed a person like her. Someone new and without ghosts chasing her. His own little personal retreat from the all-consuming guilt he dealt with day to day. He wasn't really sure what was going on, but he knew he wanted her to stick around. He didn't want to go back to that vile dark place he had been stuck in. She seemed to be the only light in his life in a long fucking time, despite the fact they'd known each other for only a day. He felt like he didn't deserve it. He didn't think he deserved anything good in his life after the amount of people he had let down. But he found himself selfishly wanting her to stick around, to make him feel that little bit better. He knew he could offer his protection for her and the boy. Even if she didn't want it he couldn't imagine not fucking doing it. He’d done it since the second she joined the group without even meaning to. He really hoped she would see how much better it was in a group, his group. That they would look after her and the baby and she didn't have to do it all alone. And he swore to himself that this time, he wouldn't fail. He wouldn't fail her or the boy. He'd never fail another fucking person again, even if it killed him. But these two right in front of him, for some weird reason, felt like his life line. His tether to root him here instead of drowning in his grief and self-pity. And he hoped that by offering her safety at the very least, that maybe, just maybe, she would stick around a little longer.
Was supposed to upload one a day of these until I run out and totally forgot lmaoooo
Let me know what you guys are thinking of this so far. This story may be somewhat darker than my usual. I don't know if dark is the right word for it but there is a lot of hurt and healing and shit involved.
Fun fact! The name of the fic was originally ‘The Hurt, The Hope’. Which is another As It Is song from the same album. I think it's self-explanatory why. The hurt is all they've been through, the hope is the kids. Carl, Judith and the new baby are the future of this new world. But I thought the other song fit it better so I changed it.
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It had been a few hours since they’d found Rosalie, and they'd done nothing but walk. Her already tired body and sore feet were screaming at her, and the cut on her arm was throbbing. Rick had said once they found shelter someone would stitch it for her. They didn't have time to stop and do it out in the open, it was too dangerous and it was getting dark. Some people had tried to introduce themselves. A woman named Maggie and her husband Glenn finding it their job to be the welcome party. Maggie pointed to everyone in the group and told her their names but she found it hard to care. She doubted she would be staying long. Once the woman realised the new girl didn't want to speak, only nodding or shaking her head and staring off at nothing, she decided it was best to leave her be. Maggie wondered if she was always like this or if it was the trauma of the day.
Rosalie noticed the crossbow guy, Daryl apparently, walking next to her the whole time. He seemed to do this thing where it felt like he projected outwards, like a protective shell that encompassed her and the baby. She wasn't sure if she was imagining it or just delirious from lack of blood and food. He never strayed far from her, and when they had to stop for a small break if someone got too tired, he seemed to hover close to her. Always alert and tense as he watched out for threats. He never seemed to let his guard down, and Rosalie knew that feeling. She had to be that way surviving on her own. If it wasn't for the fact she was injured and stupidly fucking tired, she would be the same way in that moment. The only reason she had some semblance of not being wound so tightly was the fact that she was with people, strength in numbers. She felt his gaze on her every so often but didn't care, keeping her eyes ahead. She had felt from the get-go that Daryl could easily suss people out. She just figured maybe that's what he was doing. She couldn't bring herself to care if he was. She wasn't a threat to his people, not unless they were a threat to her.
When they finally found shelter, she almost fell to the floor and kissed it out of desperation. She was beyond tired and she really didn't want to be out late in the dark with the baby. It was a run-down cabin in the woods, and after clearing it, they all filled in. They sat in the living space, a fire going to keep them warm, and the red-headed man and Latina woman took watch at the windows. When Rick handed her a bottle of formula like he promised, Rosalie felt like someone had cracked open all of her ribs. The pain and guilt were eating her alive. Even though she wasn't thrilled to be hanging with a group, she was grateful and she wanted to thank him. The words wouldn't come out though but Rick could see it in her eyes, how touched she was. He just gave her a warm smile and a pat to the shoulder. It was strange to her, ever since she relented to his request to join them, he’d acted like she was one of them. Part of the group. His words from earlier echoed in her mind. We look out for our own. She didn't feel like part of the group though. She didn't feel like one of them, and she didn’t want to. She felt like an outsider. A mere travel companion until she got her shit together enough to trust that she could look after the baby outside, or leave the baby with them. She was sitting near the fire for warmth, near the group but not directly next to anyone, clearly keeping her distance. And as soon as the boy greedily drank the formula, he happily nuzzled into her and fell asleep in her arms in his dirty blue onesie.
“How old is he?” Maggie asked from across the fire, her eyes on the sleeping boy with a caring smile. Rosalie nibbled her lip a little, avoiding all the eyes that seemed to fall on her. She never liked being the centre of attention. It felt like being the new girl in school all over again.
“I don't know,” was her blunt reply, causing a few raised eyebrows and some frowns.
“You don’t know?” Carol asked her, looking almost incredulously at her. Like how can someone not know how old their baby was, the idea was absurd.
“He’s not mine, I found him two months ago,” she said tensely, her hands protectively tightening around the boy as she glanced up, shooting a glare to the older woman. She noticed Carol's eyes widen a little, and something akin to pity or sadness crossing her features. She presumed most of the others did the same.
“You found him?” Rick asked her curiously. He was sitting off to her right, next to his son Carl and Daryl. Judith on Carl's lap. Rosalie chewed the inside of her cheek trying not to get agitated by the people that had helped her. It was natural they were curious, but she didn't want to talk about it. When she talked about it, it meant it was real and that she was in fact the sole carer of a baby that wasn't hers. She felt that crushing weight of pressure in her chest again.
“He was in the woods alone outside. I heard him crying and went to look… His mom wasn't too far away getting made into a snack,” she muttered with a dark glare at Rick, making it obvious this wasn't something she wanted to talk about. She saw the man swallow thickly and glance to the sleeping boy. She knew too well what he was thinking. How if she hadn't turned up the baby would have been next, and that was a dark thought indeed. But to the group, it also spoke volumes about what kind of person she was. To save the baby, to raise him as her own. A baby in this world was no easy feat. It was like an alarm bell for dinner for the dead, and it made it so much harder to survive. Yet she had done it, no hesitation.
A dark silence took over the group, grim thoughts swirling around their mind. Most of them thinking about baby Judith and how lucky she was not to be in that situation.
“Have you named him?” Carl spoke up, his eyes looked upon her kindly. She didn't know how she felt about that. She tensed a little, the archer next to Rick noticing. He’d noticed everything about her, observant as ever.
“I just call him Tiny,” she shrugged, making Carl snort a little. The adults didn’t find it amusing though because they knew. They knew why the boy had no name. Rosalie was terrified of naming the boy, terrified of forming an attachment other than keeping him alive for fear that something would happen. To her or the baby, none of which mattered. But ultimately the girl knew deep in her bones that one way or another, they would be separated, and she was scared to become attached to him.
Her eyes drifted to the little boy sleeping soundly curled into her. Despite every effort to not get attached to him, the girl who held no hope long before the turn had gotten very attached to him. She fucking hated herself for it, for making herself so weak and vulnerable.
“I think he looks like a Jacob,” Carol mused softly, a smile directed at the baby in Rosalie's arms.
“I like that name for him, suits him,” Maggie grinned, making Rosalie clench her jaw at people trying to name the baby that was her responsibility and hers alone. Again that conflicting feeling. She had thought about leaving the boy with them, she shouldn't be getting angry at them for naming him. What the fuck did she care? But she did, she fucking cared and it made her mad.
Much to her relief the focus soon turned from her and the boy, to people just talking to each other. She kept feeling eyes on her and when she glanced up, she noticed Daryl looking right at her through his hair as he chewed his thumb. He didn't look away, the both of them just looking at each other for a moment before Rosalie looked down at the baby. She wasn't sure what was going on with the man. She couldn't figure out if he wanted to protect her or put a bolt through her heart at the first chance he’d get. She was struggling to get a read on him now with his stoic gaze.
She felt her stomach grumble and she couldn't remember the last time she ate. She grabbed her pack and looked around, finding what she was looking for; squirrel meat wrapped in cloth. She’d caught it herself with the bow the ugly assholes from earlier had taken from her. Lucky for her, it was the only thing they had taken. But it was still a big blow as she didn't know how else to hunt for food. She had prepped it, rationing it and storing it in her bag. She didn't have much, yet for just her and the baby, it would have lasted about a week. Her eyes looked around at the others, noticing they too hadn’t eaten since they found her. She growled inwardly at the niggling feeling inside of her, telling her to share her food, to do the right thing. She wouldn't have to deal with this shit if she was alone. But they had helped her, and Rick had given her formula for the baby without any fuss or hesitation. She couldn't ignore that. She sighed a little as she took the meat wrapped in cloth, reaching over to Rick next to her and silently handing it to him. She heard the soft murmur of conversion stop around her, once more being the focus of attention she’d rather not have.
Rick looked at her confused before he unwrapped it, his stomach partially growling when he saw the meat. He knew it wasn't much for their group, but it was more than enough. More than what they currently had, which was nothing. And what's more, it was obvious this was precious to her. This was hers and would have kept her going for quite a bit. He looked a little surprised at the gesture and looked at her. She felt the heat creeping its way up her chest to her cheeks. She really hated people noticing her existence. She wasn't used to it. To Rick, although the gesture was a simple one, it carried a lot of weight to him. She could have easily not told them about it, or even just cooked it for herself. But she chose to share it with him, with his group. It was yet another thing that spoke volumes to him of what kind of person she was.
“Are you sure?” he asked hesitantly. Of course he fucking wanted the food, he needed it, they all did. Daryl had not been able to find anything when he’d gone hunting earlier that day and they were all starved. But he also didn't want her to feel like she had no choice but to hand it over to them. She just gave him a nod before looking back at the boy, stroking his dark hair a little as if to ground her. She felt uncomfortable being around this many people. All these eyes watching her and judging her. It made her skin crawl.
“Thank you,” Rick smiled. A real genuine smile that he couldn't remember the last time was on his face. The others murmured the same as they looked at her, grateful for her help, but she didn't want any of it. She wanted them to stop looking at her. Carol took the meat and started cooking it as everyone fell into conversation again, making her relax just slightly. She chanced a glance up again only to see Daryl's eyes once again on hers. But this time he gave her a little nod of thanks, seeming to take note of how uncomfortable she was with everyone looking at her and making it into a big deal. He knew that feeling all too well, he was the same. He remembered back in the prison, how people acted like he was some sort of hero for going out hunting and he hated that shit. She returned the nod and glanced back down. She really didn't know how she felt about this group yet. It wasn't long after that the meat was cooked due to how small she had cut it up, and they all ate in companionable silence. Grateful for the food in their bellies, even if it wasn't that much.
She sighed and tried to get comfortable and winced at her arm again. It hadn't been stitched. She had been adamant the baby needed food first and then he’d fallen asleep. It had stopped bleeding, the blood coagulating and starting to form a scab, but it was still hurting and pulled every time she moved it.
“Let's get you stitched up,” Rick said softly, noticing her reaction to moving her arm. He didn't want the girl's arm to get infected and it didn't take a genius to see how little she seemed to care for her own well being over the boy’s. Rather letting him sleep comfortably than get her arm seen to. Daryl got up without prompting and rummaged through a duffel, getting out a first aid kit and walking over to her. He sat beside her, glancing at the baby. He couldn't do this when she was holding him, but he wasn’t sure just how to voice it. Not when he’d observed how protective she was over him. She looked at the man, knowing what he was thinking, and Maggie picked up on it too.
“I can take him for you,” she offered with a warm smile. Rosalie tensed a little, her arm holding the boy tighter, something else that Daryl observed. He could see the war inside of herself. To trust a stranger to hold the boy, and he watched her carefully as she finally relented. He knew it was a hard decision for her to make, and he knew if the shoe was on the other foot and it was Judith, he would have been the same. Maggie gently took the sleeping baby, grinning as she looked down upon him as she held him close. Rosalie looked at her, Maggie looked like a doting mother. It made her heart hurt and she swallowed thickly. Maybe Maggie would be a good person to trust the boy with. She felt eyes on her and glanced to see Daryl, still sat next to her watching her with careful eyes. It was almost like he knew just what she was thinking. That she was going to leave the baby with them because she felt useless and inadequate to do the job herself. She looked down from his gaze, it made her feel stripped bare.
“Let me see it,” his voice was gruff but his tone was soft. It was a strange combination but she gave in anyway, lifting her arm to him with a wince. He took it in his large hands, examining it, furrowing his brow a little as he did and sucking through his teeth. It was bad, she was already aware of that. The man didn't know how she was acting so put together about it, like it was a tiny scratch. He grabbed a cloth and some alcohol to clean the wound before glancing at her through his long hair.
“S’gon’ hurt like a bitch,” he warned, his tone apologetic. He felt like the poor girl had already been through enough for one day, but if he didn't stitch her up it wouldn't end well for her. She looked at him and just gave a curt nod. She was well aware it would hurt, it wasn't the first time she’d been through this.
He looked at her a little apprehensive for a moment, almost like he didn't want to do it. Up close like this he could see her very clearly. She was pretty and looked young, no older than 25. It was an odd combination with her fierce nature he had seen when she almost chopped off that pricks head right off his skinny ass shoulders. He saw the rage that took over her, he fucking felt the same rage when the asshole had muttered those vile fucking words that made him feel like he was going to throw up everywhere. He’d heard her growl and snarl like a wild wolf protecting her pup. And now seeing her up close, he was almost startled by how soft her face was. Her dark brown hair was matted and caked in blood and grime. He noticed it was chopped crudely to just above her shoulders, almost like she had taken a knife to it and hacked at it herself. Her eyes were wide, a light blue. Yet despite their colour, they looked dull, jaded at the things she had endured. Even through the layers of dirt and blood that covered her skin, he could see she was pale as can be, but it suited her. He could also see just how tired she was, and he wondered how the fuck this tiny little thing had not only managed to keep herself alive for so long, but the boy too.
He was shocked when she had said the baby wasn't hers, that she had found him. From how protective she was of the boy, he never would have guessed she had been with him for only two months. That she wasn't his blood. He found himself grateful. Not only for the fact the baby was found at all before he endured something so horrific, but that it was Rosalie who had found him. How she had taken it upon herself to keep him alive no matter the cost. He was glad when Rick had made the decision to invite her to join them. He knew some others were a little apprehensive at first, but he knew why Rick had done so. And the reason was Judith. Daryl felt the same ache deep in his chest the second he heard the baby who was strapped to the scared girl. He felt like his stomach dropped right out of his ass and he couldn't possibly harm the girl when she was with a baby. Not unless she was a complete threat to them, which he knew she wasn't. He was ready to shoot if needed, but he could tell straight off the bat she wasn't a threat to him or the group unless they struck first. She had been desperate and wild-looking. He dreaded to think the hell she had been through to have that jaded look in her eyes, and he found an intense need to protect her and the boy. Gravitating towards them as they walked and keeping alert. He could see when she walked how tired she was. How she winced and limped a little and he knew her feet were hurting her. He couldn't imagine how she ever got any damn rest when it was just her and the boy. No one to take watch shifts with, to ever feel somewhat safe to sleep or stop for a rest. So he’d found himself by her side, protective and guarding, hoping she could sense that she could at least not be so alert and have some kind of rest. To know someone had her back for once.
He realised he’d been staring at her arm for a moment deep in thought, and as much as he didn't want to hurt her, feeling the guilt bubbling inside of his chest. He knew he’d feel a fuck tonne more guilty if she died from infection and left the baby without his guardian. He’d noticed the look Rosalie gave Maggie, and he hoped he was fucking wrong about it. He couldn't shake the feeling the girl might up and leave, leaving the boy with them. He wasn't even angry about it. He knew why she would do such a thing, he saw it as clear as day in her eyes the moment she watched the boy with Maggie. She felt like she wasn't good enough, wasn't able to keep him alive. Guilty for not being able to look after him on her own as well as a group could have. But he didn't want her to leave. He wanted her to stay, for her and the baby to become part of the group. And he really hoped he was fucking wrong about what he thought.
He got the thread ready with a needle, dowsing the needle in the alcohol to sterilize it. With one hand firmly gripping her arm, the other deftly started sewing the awful wound closed. She clenched her jaw, exhaling hard through her nose as she breathed through the pain without making a peep. It unsettled Daryl. It was almost like she'd experienced pain all too much in her life that she was used to it. No one else would have been able to act like that under the circumstances. He tried to work quickly and when he was done, he gave it another wipe with alcohol. He looked down at his work as did she, it wasn't perfect by any means but it was closed and that's what mattered. It would scar though, and the thought made Daryl angry. Angry that she would have a permanent reminder of those assholes and the things they said. The things they could have done to her and the boy before they even came across them. He wrapped her arm in a bandage, his rough hands surprisingly delicate as he undertook his task.
“Thanks,” she muttered, her voice quiet and raw sounding. He’d noticed the only few times she had spoken that her voice was quiet, and sounded so tired he wondered how she hadn’t just lay down and conked right out. He gave her a little nod and put the stuff back in the first aid kit, but he didn’t move back to his spot beside Rick. Instead he stayed next to her, leaning against the wall. She felt it again, the weird projection thing he seemed to do, and she wondered if he even knew he was doing it. She grabbed her pack and took out some dirty clothes, laying them on the floor next to her. She looked at Maggie expectantly, and Maggie gave her a sheepish smile as she handed the baby back over. Rosalie lay the baby down on the pile of clothes like a tiny makeshift mattress, before draping the blanket she used to carry him over him gently. Then she curled up next to him, protectively, her back to Daryl and the rest of them. She needed sleep so she felt better in the morning when they would head out again.
Despite the fact she was still slightly wary of the group, they'd done nothing but help her and the baby, and she was grateful. She was grateful to have a roof over their heads, for the baby to have food in his belly that he needed so desperately. To have some respite from being alone. For the fact she would be able to sleep for once. The strange projection that Daryl omitted made her feel safe. Like somehow without words, by staying next to her, giving off that vibe, he was saying to her to get some rest and she didn't need to worry. That her and the baby were safe and he wouldn't let anything happen to them. And she didn't need telling twice. Her exhausted body fell asleep instantly, her hand on the infant's tummy like she needed reassurance he was still there with her.
[[ The rest of this author note is from when I wrote it, but this is me now. Here’s the first chap of the gift I promised. Please remember there will only be 5 chapters and as of now, I have no idea when I’ll go back to finish this.]]
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So this one will end up being AU. Focused heavily and my OC and Daryl rather than everyone else. Not much else to say, no idea where the fuck I’m going with this as usual loool Set before the group gets to Alexandria.
Name of the fic is inspired by a song. The Two Tongues by As It Is.
When I think of him there's comfort in the cold
He gives me solace when I offer him control
Her voice so beautiful will find me and explain
That life is agony but worth it all the same
I've been to hell and back
I've been living in between
Where the sky is always grey
And the grass is ever green
No I'm not sure I'm right
But I'm not sure I'm wrong
I'm just desperate to belong
Her voice like a sunrise
His voice like temptation
She sings to me softly
He's screaming salvation
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The sounds of boots slapping the damp mud in the forest, mixed with her own heavy breathing, were the only sounds in Rosalie's ears. Blaring like an alarm, letting her know exactly just how much she was in danger. And to put it lightly, she was fucked. She dodged and weaved the trees like a bat out of hell, eyes fixed on the break in the trees in front of her. The weight wrapped around her middle was weighing on her heavily, not just physically, but mentally. With each step it was as if she could feel just how heavy the burden placed on her shoulders really was. Like being put to the test, and she really fucking hated it. She had to get out of here, she fucking had to. She could still hear the men back further in the forest, not giving up the unrelenting chase of the young girl. Despite the fact her boots felt like they were filling with blood from her torn up feet, she didn't slow down. She was a lone survivor. Well maybe not completely alone, but she didn't exactly have anyone to have her back. She knew better than that by now. She’d been alone for years now. But the weight of having something else to keep alive, something to keep safe, it was a hard pill to swallow, especially when said thing was making life that much more difficult.
The cut on her arm stung like a bitch as it bled everywhere, the warm crimson liquid dripping down her arm. She had a fleeting thought that it was creating quite an inviting trail for the dead ones to track her with and have a nice meal, or even the assholes who were after her. She knew it'd need stitches and could only pray to a God that clearly either didn't exist or give a shit, that it wouldn't get infected. At this point, so far past the turn, finding antibiotics was a rare fucking thing. Her lungs burned deep in her chest from her violently sucking in air and heaving it out. She could only focus on getting far away. She knew she'd put a good distance between her and the assholes chasing her, being small and nimble had its perks. But she knew they were still chasing her, and she wondered with a dark feeling if they’d ever even stop.
She broke out of the tree line, but what should have felt like a small victory rapidly turned on its head as she was faced with a large group of survivors just a few feet away in the road. It felt like a fraction of a second before all weapons were trained on her, and she drew her machete with a shaky weak arm, the other curling protectively around the thickly wrapped sheet around her middle. Her eyes were wild. Fear and desperation clear as day in them. A girl who had seen way too much shit for her age. Twenty...something. She was twenty one when the world fell apart and she’d lost track of how much time had passed since then. She really wasn't sure anymore, she didn’t give a shit. None of it mattered anymore. The only thing that did matter was staying alive. Age had no purpose in the new world because no matter the number, your life could end swiftly from the dead or the living. It didn't matter if you were 5 or 82.
Her wide haunted eyes rapidly flit around, taking in the threats as she was assessing them. A man with shaggy hair and a beard, holding a revolver. A dirty man with a crossbow and a scowl that would make Satan shit himself. A black woman with swords, a young boy with a gun. There were more, but her fatigue was making it hard to even decipher them, her stance wavering as she fought hard not to collapse. She wondered if they were part of the group chasing her, but despite the fact they looked worn down and like they'd been dragged through hell and back, they didn't seem like it. They didn't give off the extremely dark vibe that the others had. The others, although clearly living and breathing humans, were more animal than man, and those were the kind you really needed to stay away from.
“I don't want any trouble,” her firm yet scared voice sounded foreign to herself, rough and scratchy from not using it for so long and from not having had a drink. She couldn't remember the last time she had a drink. She often went without these days. There was something much more important that needed it. The others squinted at her, and the man with the revolver cocked his head. She couldn’t hide from his eyes that looked like maybe he'd lost his marbles just a little bit. She couldn't really blame him, she had that same look in her own eyes. The one that said she had seen the darkest depths of hell, that said she was desperate and would do anything for survival. It was tense, none of them wavering as if waiting for the other shoe to drop. And then, the bundle wrapped securely around her moved and a small cry came from it. The survivor's eyes widened just a fraction, glancing at each other before back to her. A sound of a baby so strange to them, despite the fact they had one of their own. Some of them wavered their weapons a little, as if the idea of hurting someone with a baby wasn't something they could stomach. If they shot her, they could hit the baby, or the baby would get crushed when she fell like a sack of crap.
Rosalie swallowed thickly and took a shaky step back, her weapon still raised as she tried to see if they would put a damn bullet in her back the second she turned. Her hand held the baby's head protectively as she glanced down, shushing the baby in a low soothing tone. The man with the revolver slowly lowered his weapon, and most of the others followed suit. He was either the leader or they just trusted his judgement, Rosalie mused. He looked almost pained as he glanced at the wiggling bundle attached to the woman, the woman who seemed too haunted. The thought of one girl, one person on their own having to survive with a baby, made the man's blood run cold. He knew how hard it was and he wasn't ever alone anymore. He had his group, his family to have his back. To know that if anything did happen to him, the baby would be safe and protected still. And this girl, with the desperate look in her eyes that he knew all too well, she didn't have that luxury.
She exhaled a shaky breath and was about to leave, but that would be way too easy for the unfortunate events that made up her life. Nothing was ever easy in Rosalie's life. From the moment she was born with the umbilical cord wrapped around her neck to her mother dying in childbirth, it only went downhill after that with her evil father shifting the blame onto the innocent child. Her life was one shitty thing after another, and the new world did nothing to change that fact. If anything, it made it much much worse.
The three vile men suddenly appeared out of the trees. It was as if they had somehow not noticed the large group of survivors not too far away, or maybe they were too stupid to care, their eyes on the prize as it were. She thought it was a combination of both. As deranged as these men were, they really weren't too clever or aware of their surroundings. It was how she managed to get away in the first place.
Rosalie's eyes widened in terror and took a step back, a low feral sounding growl erupting from her lips as she held her machete up, looking more alert than she did seconds before. She looked like a wild animal ready to attack, to fight for its life and do whatever it took to survive. It was a look that didn't match up with her almost angelic pretty face and tiny petite frame.
“Now now kitten, that wasn't very nice to leave us like that,” the man with long straggly hair sneered. He was thin and sickly looking, a wild gleam in his eye. The man to his left, far too fat for this world and Rosalie wondered how the fuck he’d managed that one, laughed loudly.
“Forget the girl, I want the baby,” the balding man to the right side gleefully stated. The words polluted the air and caused the group to gasp, shocked from the other survivors who were watching, weapons drawn and appalled faces. Because no matter the horrors you found in this world, something always came along to outdo it.
With no hesitation, when those vile vile words left the man's lips and then left them distracted by the other group, a loud snarl left Rosalie as she dove at the man, swiping her machete with a force that looked unreal for her small weak frame. The blade sliced cleanly through the man's neck, almost severing his head. And with a sudden flurry of movement and noise, the leader hit the floor like a tonne of bricks, a bullet right through the temple, as the man to his left got a bolt right in the eye and fell next to him.
Rosalie's head whipped to the others, seemingly shocked that anyone had even bothered to help her or the child. Did good people exist anymore? She really gave up that hope a long fucking time ago. She stopped expecting the best of people before the world went to shit and it only went downhill after. The thick silence filled the air and she blinked wearily at them. Fatigue was setting into her bones but she needed to go. She needed to find somewhere to hole up for the night, to find safety for the little thing attached to her that had seemingly taken over her life, the fierce need to protect. She turned her back, feeling like they wouldn't hurt her. Why bother helping if they'd just kill her? She started stalking away, wincing at the pain in her feet.
“Wait!” the voice rang out in the tense air and stopped her in her tracks, making her turn cautiously, half expecting a gun trained on her. But instead, she found the revolver man who had taken a few strides towards her. She narrowed her gaze distrustfully at him. In response he held his hands up, giving her a weird look, like he was looking at a scared animal and he didn't want to spook it.
“You should come with us, ain’t safe out here on your own, not with a baby,” his words were soothing, like he'd done this all too many times before. Diplomatic and calming. She was good at reading people and she wondered if he was some kind of law enforcement before the shit hit the fan. She'd had enough experience with police in her past to know one when she heard one. Rosalie chewed the inside of her cheek as her eyes flit to the others watching carefully behind him. Although no weapons were pointed at her, she could sense their readiness to do so if needed.
“They won't hurt you, we’re good people,” he said softly, as if he could sense her apprehension. He didn't really blame her for feeling that way, especially not after what they had just witnessed. It painfully reminded him of the other group he came across when one of his own had returned to him. The Claimers. The one slimy fuck that had his eye on his son, the one who ended up with his entrails all over the floor.
She didn't like this. She didn't like people and she didn't want to be part of another group just so they could fucking die around her like the last one all those years ago, not long after the dead started walking and got a penchant for eating people. She already had enough on her plate looking after the kid. She didn’t need feelings or attachments, nothing of the sort. One was more than enough. That shit was what got you killed out here. She didn't say a word, turning around and carrying on walking. The man's shoulders slumped a little, the idea of letting her and the baby walk away to an almost certain death not sitting right with him.
“We have a baby too...We have formula...if you need any. We look out for our own. You come with us, we can make sure the baby is safe,” Just as he hoped, the woman stilled again, but didn't turn to him this time. He could see her clench her fist a little, the one with no weapon. He also noticed the gash on her arm that looked like a defensive wound. It was dangerous to have a wound like that these days, and he doubted she could sew it up herself.
“Someone can help with your arm, sew it up. Won't be much use to your baby if you die from infection or blood loss,” he prodded, knowing the girl clearly cared about the baby and trying to coax her using that knowledge.
She slowly turned around, tugging her lower lip with her teeth as her bloodied arm came around to the baby’s head that was now poking out from what looked like a tatty bloodstained blanket that was tied tightly around her. The dark-haired baby cooed at her, pulling at her necklace, and Rosalie glanced from the man to the baby. She knew he was right, that she couldn't do this alone. If she died, what chance did the baby have of surviving? None. Just like when she had found him. She mulled around the idea of leaving the small boy with the people, but she found a strange pain in her chest when she did. She’d at least have to stick around a little to see if she could trust them with such a thing.
After a few tense moments of silence, she looked back up at the man, seeing his hopeful gaze imploring her to do the right thing. If they wanted her dead, they would have done it by now, that much was obvious. She’d run into too many bad people already in the new world. She could tell they were different. But despite the apprehension swelling inside of her, she had to. She had to fucking hope that maybe all the people left in the world weren't evil, and that maybe this was her chance to give the baby the life he deserved. The guilt swam deep in her veins, remembering what he said about formula. She’d ran out weeks ago, and the baby was surviving on mashed foods that were way too much for a boy his age. As much as she was grateful that the baby was mostly quiet, she knew deep inside of her, part of that reason was because he wasn't getting what he needed, wasn't getting the right nutrients and it was making him weak.
Rosalie took a deep shaky breath to steady her nerves before giving the man a small nod, and he breathed a sigh of relief, stepping closer. He didn't fail to notice how the grip on her machete tightened without her raising it, or how the arm around the baby gripped harder.
“I’m Rick,” he said with a warm smile, holding his hand out but she looked at it like he’d grown three heads. Shaking hands wasn't a thing in this new world. Hell, she didn’t shake hands in the old world either. She still took it though, her small hand giving him a weak shake and letting him see just how tired and weak she really was.
“Rosalie,” she muttered, her eyes tired and her whole body screaming with pain. She didn't offer up the baby's name but Rick didn't mention it. He would be protective of Judith too. He nodded at her and tilted his head in the direction of the group before walking back over to them. She heaved a sigh before trudging off after him, watching the others eye her curiously, some wary. They should be wary. They didn't know what she was capable of, and she knew they were smart just for feeling the same apprehension she felt about them.
“This is Rosalie, she’ll be joining us,” Rick’s words were firm as he gazed around the group that had become his family, waiting for anyone to speak up, to challenge him. But the baby cooed again and it was as if the noise itself was enough to soften anyone who may have had doubts, to leave such an innocent thing out in the world like this. The children were the future now, the only hope the cold world may have. And with no more words, they all turned around and started back on their journey. One to find somewhere to call home, to feel safe. Somewhere Carl and Judith could be safe from the horrors of the new world, and now somewhere for this new baby to have the same.
This is it guys. I wasn't sure whether to do one more chapter after this but it felt right to end it where I did. Sequel maybe at some point? Let me know. I’m always open for suggestions and shit. If you guys love these two I’d be up for doing more of them when I’ve got to my other stories.
I hope you enjoyed this one. It took me to places I didn't expect it to go when I first started it but that's why I love writing.
I’ll be starting on the sequel to Flames very soon and I have another Daryl story I'll be posting after this one.
I hate writing endings so I hope this makes you happy and it's okay for you lovelies.
Thank you for reading and being on this journey with me! I love you guys!
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“What about this one?” Glenn asked as he glanced at Daryl curiously. Daryl walked over, his brow furrowing before he shook his head.
“Nah. It's way too big,” he huffed, getting frustrated that he couldn't seem to find the right thing he was looking for.
“I thought you said you wanted big?” Glenn asked with a frown.
“Not that big. She’s fuckin’ tiny. Put that on her finger she'd fall right over,” Daryl snorted, Glenn shook his head with a wry grin.
“We should have brought Eric along. He already has a few ideas on what rings she might like. He could have brought his notebook with him,” Aaron said softly as he looked at a ring in his hand.
“Notebook?” Daryl asked hesitantly as he watched him. Aaron put the ring down and looked at Daryl amused.
“Come on. You really think if you tell him you’re planning on proposing to Zoey he wouldn't start planning things? He’s already got everything planned out, you won't have to lift a finger when she says yes,” Aaron chuckled. His husband had been so excited ever since Daryl mentioned he wanted to ask Zoey to marry him.
“Ain't sure she’ll say yes,” Daryl sighed, being his usual pessimistic self. Both Glenn and Aaron turned to look at him like he had grown another head.
“You’re kidding right?” Glenn asked incredulously as Daryl just shrugged at him.
“Of course she’ll say yes! How could you even doubt that?” Aaron chided with a frown. Daryl rolled his eyes and gave him a look.
“And how the fuck d’ya know she’ll say yes?” he asked sceptically.
“Because she loves you more than anything. Anyone can see that. Trust me, if Maggie would agree to marry me, Zoey will agree to marry you,” Glenn snorted, fishing out another ring from the broken counter. They were in a run-down jewellery store. Most things still here since no one really had a need for these things now. Except for the current moment.
“What about this one?” Glenn asked again as he held another ring out. Daryl took it and inspected it. He didn't really know what he was looking for. He couldn't say he’d done this shit before. But he knew when he saw this ring that it was it. It just felt right. It had a decent-sized diamond in the middle with a few smaller ones either side. The silver ring just seemed right to him and he nodded, a smile forming on his face. The lengths he had gone to in order to figure out her ring size was comical. At first, Maggie had offered up her ring so he could see if it fit and whilst she was asleep he had slipped it onto her finger. It was a little big though. In his desperation he had ended up using a bit of string, wrapping it around her finger and cutting it so he had a string the size of the circumference of her fucking finger. Rick had found it hilarious when he told him.
He hadn't meant for everyone to know. Whilst Zoey was having a girls night, Daryl had gone over to Ricks. Aaron, Eric and Glenn were also there and as he quietly spoke to Rick about his plan to ask her, Eric had overheard him. Of course, the man was excited and announced it to the whole room and he wanted the ground to swallow him whole as they all made a big deal out of it. He was glad now that they knew though, that they were helping him with this. Rick was back home distracting his girl whilst he picked the best ring for her.
After rummaging in the back to find the right size for her and grabbing some wedding bands for the pair, something Aaron suggested that he wouldn't have thought about, they made their way home. When he got out of the truck Rick walked down the porch steps to meet him with a grin.
“How is she?” Daryl asked him, worrying about her as he always did.
“She's fine. She's in there with Judith and Carl, I think we distracted her enough. Did you get it?” Rick asked with a grin. Daryl had been taken aback by how excited his family was over this, it made his heart swell in his chest.
“Yeah,” Daryl smiled, unable not to as he grabbed the box out of his pocket. He opened it and Rick looked, nodding in approval. He heard the front door open and Zoey appeared and he stuffed the box back into his pocket. The nerves were running rampant in him now. He had all he needed and he was planning on getting it over with today. He was shitting himself that she would say no.
“You’re back!” she beamed at him, making his heart beat all funny in his chest. A month had passed since they first had sex but no matter how long they had been together, she always made him feel like his insides were mush. She bounded over, kissing his lips softly and he felt the tips of his ears turned pink as Rick smirked at him.
Later that night after dinner Zoey was washing the dishes as Daryl paced in the living room. He was trying not to freak out visibly but he couldn't help it. It was one thing thinking about doing it, but actually proposing to her and putting himself in such a vulnerable position was terrifying. He’d never thought much of marriage, even before the turn. He had always thought it was pointless. People still broke their vows and it just seemed like a way for people to throw money around and have the spotlight on them. After the turn it seemed even more stupid. When Glenn and Maggie got married he didn't see the point in it. It wasn't like there were laws and shit now anyway. But now he found himself wanting that with her. He couldn't explain it but he wanted them to officially be bound together. To declare their love and take the next step. He felt like a fucking idiot for wanting such a thing.
“Are you okay?” Zoey asked, making him jump as he hadn't heard her sneak up on him. She frowned as she looked him over. He was so jittery and acting strange.
“You’re acting weird, what's wrong?” she frowned. He shook his head and looked at the floor and her heart was hammering away. She was thinking the worst of course. Wondering if something happened when he was out the walls. What if he was bit and he couldn't bring himself to tell her? He was sweating, a sheen of sweat on his forehead, what if he had a fever? Her heart was sinking and she stepped closer, brushing the hair from his face.
“Did something happen when you were out?” the concern in her voice made his heart ache. He just needed to do this. Rip it off like a damn band-aid before she worried herself sick.
“I gotta do somethin’. And...and I ain’t want ya to laugh at me alright?” he said carefully. It felt like the breath was sucked out of her lungs as he looked at her. He looked so small. Like a young boy who was scared and lost. It made her feel weird but she nodded at his bizarre request. He inhaled deeply trying to calm himself before he rummaged in his pocket. He got down on one knee and Zoey's eyes bugged out of her head as he opened the box with the ring in it. Her brain was trying to catch up with her and it felt like her heart stopped beating entirely as she just blinked down at him.
“Ya know I ain’t good with this shit. Ain't good with words but I… I know it might seem stupid, with the world the way it is. But I really want ya to be my wife. I wanna be yer husband. To treat ya like the queen I know ya are. I want… I want to spend the rest of my life showin’ ya how much I love ya...if ya’ll have me,” he fumbled over his words as he looked up at her imploring, fully expecting her to shoot him down.
She was silent for a moment and every second was killing him. He just needed her to reject him and get it over with.
“Yes,” she whispered, her lower lip quivering as tears filled her eyes.
“What?” he asked sounding dumbfounded at her answer. She snorted as she wiped her eyes and shook her head at him. She had no idea why he thought she would say no. She wanted to shake him for even thinking that.
“Yes! I’ll marry you!” she sniffled with a laugh.
Daryl couldn't even put into words how elated he was. How his heart expanded in his chest as he stared at her in disbelief. He grinned at her, his own eyes pricking with tears as his shaky hand took out the ring and slipped it onto her finger. He stood up as she smiled at the ring admiring it and it made him feel good that he picked right. It was a perfect fit too.
“How did you know my size?” she asked incredulously.
“Don't ask,” he snorted, wiping his eyes as she stepped closer. She pulled him down and kissed him hard, the pair pouring their emotion into the kiss. He was still shocked she said yes.
“I love you Mr Dixon,” she grinned up at him. He felt like he was getting lost in her blue eyes as he looked down adoringly at her.
“I love ya too Mrs Dixon,” he smirked, making her laugh lightly.
“How do we do this? Do we have an actual wedding or are we married now?” she asked curiously as he stroked her cheek affectionately.
“No fuckin’ clue. Best ask Eric,” he snorted. She quirked a brow looking at him.
“Eric?” she asked curiously.
“Aaron said somethin’ about a notebook. He’s planned the whole fuckin’ thing,” he said with a shrug. She laughed and shook her head. It didn't surprise her really. The man got excited about anything.
“Does everyone know?” she asked, leaning into him as he nuzzled her cheek. Obviously from what he said Aaron and Eric knew and she had a feeling Glenn knew since Daryl was on runs with him and no doubt helped with the ring.
“I dunno. Few people. Mighta ran their mouth off though so I’ve no idea,” he murmured into her hair and he inhaled her sweet scent. He could just lose himself in her forever. He fucking wanted to. He never would have imagined himself to feel this way about anyone. To love them like this, to want to marry them. Even after all they had been through together, it felt surreal to him. Never had he felt happiness this great before. He looked at her and he felt like everything was right with the world, despite all that was wrong outside of those walls. She was everything to him. He lived and breathed her. She was a part of him and he was a part of her. All it fucking took was the world to end for him to finally get his happy ending.
I know you guys have been waiting for this shit looool
One more chapter after this one.
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When he walked in Zoey was sat on the couch and she jumped up when she saw him. She rushed over, taking his bruised swollen hand on her own as she frowned. She blinked up at him and he couldn't look her in the eye, feeling like such a piece of shit. Like he’d proved the asshole right and now everyone was scared of him. No doubt thought he was a fucking woman beater.
“Ya know I’d never hurt ya right?” he asked brokenly, finally glancing at her through his hair. She gave him a little smile and nodded.
“I know. I have no doubt you’d never lay a hand on me. You always keep me safe. Like today,” she said softly, making him tilt his head curiously at her. She didn't seem upset with him at all. He had expected her to shout at him or give him that disappointed look that made him want to run off into the woods and never come home.
Instead, she led him over to the couch and shoved him to sit before she scurried off into the kitchen. She came back seconds later with a dish towel soaked in cold water. She sat next to him and started cleaning up his hand and he just looked at her confused.
“Ya not mad?” he asked sounding bewildered.
“Why would I be mad? He’s an asshole, I’m glad you decked him,” she said matter of factly. Daryl only got more confused and tilted his head at her. She looked at him and heaved a sigh as she tossed the cloth onto the coffee table.
“I'll admit you didn't need to keep hitting him. I thought you might cave his face in for a second. But he deserved it. Saying all that shit about you,” she frowned, her big blue eyes feeling like they were penetrating into his soul.
“So ya not… not scared of me or nothin’?” he asked hesitantly. Every mother fucker here seemed to be. Except for his family. They knew what he was like.
“No. I’m not. You didn’t scare me, if anything it was kind of…” she trailed off, looking down as her cheeks heated up and he squinted at her suspiciously.
“Kind of what?” he asked warily, watching as she turned her eyes back up to him.
“It was kind of hot okay? Having you just swoop in and punch him like that,” she mumbled, her cheeks getting redder by the second as his jaw almost hit the floor. She shook her head and went to stand up, clearly about to scurry off since she was embarrassed. But as she stood he grabbed her wrist and yanked on it lightly, causing her to sit in his lap straddling him.
“Kinda hot huh?” he smirked, loving how her cheeks were a pretty pink colour as she snorted and looked down.
“You're so smug it's making my eyes hurt,” she huffed playfully. He grinned at her, shaking his head. He fucking loved her. She always managed to make shit better and feel lighter. He also couldn't deny it was hot that she liked him defending her like that.
“Like me swoopin’ in, comin’ to ya rescue?” he asked, his voice dropping an octave as he kissed her neck softly. Her breathing picked up, a thrill running down her spine at his tone and how his hands greedily grabbed at her hips. Her eyes fluttered closed as she nodded, enjoying the attention he was lavishing her neck with.
“Like me bein’ all protective?” he drawled against her skin before nipping at her throat. She moaned, her head falling back and he watched her with rapt attention, loving watching her when she was like this.
She could feel him getting hard under her and without thought she found herself grinding against him, making him moan and nip at her neck again. The chemistry the pair had was always on fire. Like a spark igniting about to blow. He was nipping and sucking her neck, leaving marks. The attention Spencer had shown her was getting under his skin and he was staking his claim on her visibly so every fucker here would be reminded of him when they saw her.
“Asked ya a question sweetheart,” he said firmly, making her squeak as his hands gripped her ass under her dress.
“Yes,” she moaned softly, her cheeks heating up. She did find it sexy when he was protective of her. He groaned right next to her ear, arching up at her as his fingers dug into the flesh on her ass cheeks.
At first, when they started being sexual with one another, he had been hesitant and gentle, like he thought she was made of glass. She was glad he was at first, her mental state hadn't been great. But she was much better now, much like her older self and just like the older version of herself, she still liked the same things in bed. Daryl had started being more vocal, more dominant in the bedroom and she loved it. It wasn't scary for her, it wasn't dominant in a selfish way that he would force her to do things and just take what he wanted from her. It was dominant in a good way. Being a sexy bossy bastard but she knew he would also take care of her and look after her. She felt safe and cared for with him. She found herself wanting to obey him, to please him because despite how he would order her about sometimes in bed, she knew if she really didn't want to do something he wouldn't be upset in the least.
She fisted his hair and kissed him hungrily, catching him off guard for a brief moment. He kissed her back with just as much need, pulling her closer if it was even possible. Things were getting intense between them when a knock broke them apart at their door. She whined and Daryl growled in frustration, the pair still like they hoped the person would just go away. Another loud knock sounded and Zoey huffed as she stood up.
“Hurry up and make them go away,” she whined, making him smirk at her with how eager she was.
“I’ll try,” he snorted, making her squint at him. She stepped closer to him, a mischievous glint in her eye as she leant close to his ear. He shivered when her breath tickled him and her soft fingers traced the skin on his lower belly under his shirt.
“I want you to fuck me until I can’t walk, so you better try,” she smirked, knowing how her words would affect him. She was ready, she was done waiting and pussyfooting around. He had worked her up and she wanted him.
She took a step back trying to look all coy and innocent and he blinked at her. The look on his face was priceless. A mix between shock that she had uttered those words to him and a deep need for her as he glared at her with his hooded gaze. She saw his Adam's apple bob in his throat as he swallowed thickly, glancing to the door like he was considering not opening it at all. Another knock made him roll his eyes, it obvious that whoever it was wasn't about to go away.
“Best answer that, I’ll be waiting upstairs,” she grinned cheekily. He squinted at her as he watched her prance off upstairs and he trudged over to the door, swinging it open with a scowl.
“The fuck ya want?” he growled at Rick who stood there with a quirked brow. Daryl's hair was all over the place and Ricks's eyes looked over Daryl's shoulder like he expected to see Zoey, feeling like he interrupted something he shouldn't have. She was nowhere to be seen though.
“I just wanted to come by and apologise for being so harsh earlier. You know how stressed I’ve been lately. Especially with some people pushin’ back at me. But I shouldn't have spoke to you that way,” Rick sighed. It had been weighing heavy on his mind and he couldn't settle unless he knew he and Daryl were on good terms again.
“Yeah, s’fine. We both said shit we didn't mean. That all?” Daryl mumbled impatiently, glancing over to the stairs. Rick watched him carefully realising he had indeed interrupted something.
“I mean it, Daryl. I don’t like fightin’ with you, I need to know we’re good,” Rick pushed, making Daryl huff and shift on the spot.
“We’re good. That all?” he asked giving Rick a pointed look. Rick tilted his head a little, an amused smirk spreading across his face with how skittish Daryl was being.
“You sure seem in a rush to get back inside. You sure you're not still mad?” he asked. Daryl squinted, the look on Rick's face told him a different story to his words. Rick knew what he was doing and Daryl wanted to smack him upside the head.
“I ain’t mad...I just… Zo’s waitin’ on me so…” he admitted, hoping being blunt with him was enough to make the man fucking leave.
“Oh really? What you guys up to?” Rick smirked. Daryl felt the tips of his ears burning as he glared at him.
“Nothin’ since ya stood here makin’ me talk to ya,” he glowered. Rick snorted and shook his head. He couldn't help himself.
“I won’t keep you any longer. I just want you to know I do mean it though, I am sorry,” he said with a small smile. Daryl found himself relaxing a little as he looked at him.
“M’sorry too. We were both assholes, but let's just move past it. We’re good,” he said with a nod, making RIck smile wider at him and pat his arm. Daryl didn't actually realise just how tense he felt over fighting with Rick. He never liked fighting with the man but now he felt like a weight had been lifted that they were both okay.
“Ya gon’ leave or what?” Daryl snorted when Rick still didn't go. Rick grinned at him holding his hands up in surrender.
“You sure you don’t want me to join in? Might be fun,” he teased, making Daryl squint at him and flip him off.
“Should be ashamed of yaself. I’mma tell Michonne when I next see her,” Daryl snorted.
“Ah shit, don’t do that. I’d have the pointy end of her katana up my ass,” he laughed as he took a step backwards. Daryl grinned at him and shook his head as he watched him leave. He shut the door behind him feeling better now they sorted shit. Then he remembered his girl waiting upstairs and what they were finally going to do. They'd done a lot of shit together but they hadn't had sex yet. He had been waiting for her cue with that one and now she was very clear with what she wanted. He just hoped she hadn't changed her mind in the time that had passed with Rick at the door.
He toed his boots off and made his way upstairs. By the time he reached the bedroom, he had already taken his vest and shirt off. He walked in and she wasn't in the room. He frowned to himself as he tossed the clothes onto the floor near the bed. He jumped out of his fucking skin as something grabbed at his sides, an unmanly yelp leaving his lips as he whirled around. Zoey burst out laughing at the noise he made and he glared at her as he tried to calm his rapidly beating heart.
“The fuck girl? Scared the shit outta me,” he huffed, a hand over his heart. She bit her lip to stifle her laughter as she tried to look contrite. She failed though, miserably and he squinted at her amused face.
“I couldn't help myself,” she grinned innocently at him. His eyes trailed her body realising suddenly how naked she was.
Her marks didn't bother him, he actually really didn't even notice them anymore when they were doing shit like this. All he could see was his beautiful completely fucking naked girl stood there batting her lashes at him all innocent-like. It made his dick ache and he walked towards her, making her smirk and step back until she hit the wall. It was like when he was drunk and he pinned her against the wall. She felt breathless as she looked at the predatory look he was giving her.
“Cheeky lil thing huh?” he smirked, making her cheeks flush as he mirrored his words from when he wanted her when he had been drinking. All she could do was blink up at him helpless and he pressed his body against hers, trapping her against the wall.
“Cat got ya tongue?” he purred as he leant down, ghosting her lips with his. She closed her eyes and whined at his teasing.
“You fight dirty,” she huffed, opening her eyes again as he moved away from her, leaving her body feeling cold.
“Damn right I do,” he smirked, his blue eyes not leaving hers as he rummaged in his pocket and pulled out a condom.
He took his pants and boxers off, leaving him as naked as she was, each getting a good eyeful of the other. He tossed his jeans in the pile with the rest of his clothes as he made his way over to the bed. He propped up some pillows against the wall and got on the bed, sat leaning against them as he put the rubber on. He looked at her, his ego growing noticing how she was outright ogling him like she was. It made him feel fucking good. He gestured with his head for her to come over and it sent a thrill right through him when she smiled to herself and obeyed.
She climbed into his lap and he was practically purring as he nuzzled her cheek affectionately. He was so fucking ready for this, to finally feel her around him. He was disappointed he had to use a fucking condom. He’d love to feel her fully but he knew they couldn't risk it. He moaned as she kissed him ferociously. It seemed more intense than usual, the pair more needy as they groped at each other and kissed each other breathless. His breathing hitched when she moved away, grabbing his dick and lining him up with her. The anticipation was killing him and his eyes never left her face. This was a big fucking deal. He knew it, she knew it. She hadn't had sex since the abuse she endured and this was step further than fooling around like they had been. They locked eyes as she sunk down onto his cock with a gasp, making him groan and squeezed his eyes shut.
Holy fuck she was tight. So fucking tight and hot and he felt like he’d died and gone to heaven. It had been forever since he’d had the pleasure of being buried inside of a woman and this was fucking everything. She clung to his broad shoulders, the pair unmoving as she adjusted. He was glad she had to be still for a moment because he would have gone off like a fucking horny teen and hated himself for the rest of his life. He opened his eyes, his heart swelling as she gave him a little smile before biting her lower lip. His hands were around her, stroking her back lovingly as he leaned up and kissed her tenderly. As much as he could fuck her into the mattress until she was screaming his name, this was their first time and he wanted it to be special. He knew it was special for him, no matter how much of a pussy that made him.
She kissed him back, the excitement blooming in her stomach and she rolled her hips testing the waters. It sent a jolt of pleasure through her and she moaned against his lips as he gasped, threading a hand into her long hair and fisting it. She felt fucking heavenly and he felt love drunk as he arched up at her, needing more friction. She took her cue as she started moving her hips more, the pair of them panting against the other's lips. It was intense despite the slow pace, the air around them like an electric current as it sparked around them. The hand splayed on her back held her close to him as he arched up, meeting her motions. He couldn't remember sex ever feeling this fucking good before. He felt like he was falling off the edge off a cliff.
Their moans filled the room as she moved faster, their pleasure ramping up a notch. Daryl could feel the tingling at the base of his spine starting, he knew he wouldn't last much longer. Everything felt too intense, magnified even. He moved his hand between them, rubbing circles around her clit and relishing in the loud moan that left her lips. Hearing and seeing her in the throes of pleasure was always something he loved. She was a sight to behold like this. She rode him faster, grinding herself against his thumb and he groaned.
“Shit girl,” he moaned, his eyes squeezing shut as he felt his release rapidly approaching, no hope of stopping it from happening. She just felt too damn good.
He could feel her fluttering around his cock and he knew she was close too. He just really hoped he could get her to cum before he did so he didn't leave her hanging. He rubbed her clit a little faster and she gasped loudly. He watched her intently as her body shook, his dick being squeezed so hard she felt like she might push him out of her. Feeling her tighten around him as she came pushed him over the edge and he grunted, hiding his face in her neck as he bucked his hips to into her. He came hard, spilling himself into the rubber before his body went lax. They were both panting as she sagged against him and he stroked her back softly, kissing her shoulder.
She sat up looking at him and his heart ached in his chest. He wasn't sure if it was just him or if she felt the connection between them get even stronger. Like bonds forged in iron tying them to each other forever. Maybe he was just being a little bitch because he came? Who fucking knew? She smiled sweetly at him and his lips quirked up too, unable to help himself. They were still riding their high and no words were needed for the intensity of the moment, how their feelings seemed to grow. She leant down and captured his lips with her own. His hands came around her again, stroking her back as he kissed her. Slow and sensual as his tongue massaged hers. One more hurdle passed. His heart only growing as they passed it.
“I love ya,” he rasped against her lips when he needed to pull away for air. The radiant smile she gave him made him melt into a fucking puddle.
“I love you too,” she said with a grin, making him smile up at her adoringly. They needed to invent a whole new word for how he felt about her because love felt redundant. He didn't love her. The word didn't even come close.
She was his everything, and he wanted to be hers. He felt like their souls were so entwined, that they'd always been that way. That everything that led him to that moment, even all the pain and heartbreak he endured along the way, it was to lead him here to her. He found himself for the first time in his life feeling happy. He didn't feel bitter about his past, not when the reason for it all was Zoey. He would do it all again, go through every painful memory if it meant he would have her forever. She was worth all the pain in the world.
I'm taking a few days away from writing to clear my head. Life's a mess but there we fucking go. Only two more chapters left after this one guys then I'll be starting on the sequel to Flames.
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Zoey was a little nervous as she walked back to the house. Rick had gone to collect her from Carol’s and she didn’t know what was waiting for her since she left when Daryl asked her not to.
“It’ll be fine. He knows he messed up,” Rick said softly from beside her as if he had read her mind. He was gracious enough to walk her back home even though it wasn’t too far from Carols. She chewed her lower lip and nodded before glancing to him.
“Thanks for talking to him. I was just making it worse,” she sighed with a frown. They stopped walking as they got to her porch steps and she turned to face him.
“You know how he is. When he gets overwhelmed he acts like an asshole. It's why I need to keep him in check sometimes,” he grinned wryly at her making her snort. She was grateful for Rick. It was clear just how close he and Daryl were and she was glad he had been able to talk some sense into him. She bid him goodbye before she jogged up the steps and slipped inside.
Daryl was pacing and she shut the door and looked at him warily. He stopped pacing when he saw her and frowned.
“Zoey… I know sorry ain’t good ‘nough alright? And I’ll spend the rest of my damn life tellin’ ya sorry if it’ll make ya feel better. I lost my shit but I ain’t have a right to do what I did,” he rambled as he looked at her imploringly. He looked like he was fully convinced she would tell him to go fuck himself and that she was done. Because he was convinced that's what she would say.
“It’s okay. I get you were worried. I don't need to tell you it can’t happen again, but I do get emotions were a little high,” she said softly as she gave him a timid smile. Relief flooded his body and she could see him relax. He was glad she didn't hate him. He’d fucked up again but once again she was forgiving him.
“Won’t happen again. I promise,” he said firmly.
He made good on his promise. A few days passed and as hard as it was for him to let her leave the house, he did anyway. They had compromised. She was happy for him to go with her when she left so he could feel settled that she would be okay. He still worried but being with her was enough to quell his deep fear so he didn’t lash out again. Even if he was following her everywhere like a lost puppy.
They were outside at Aaron's house. Daryl was working on his bike whilst Aaron, Eric, Glenn and Maggie were chatting away. Zoey by his side as she asked him what every single part of the bike was. If it was anyone else he would have been annoyed and told them to go the fuck away. But he loved that she was taking an interest in something he loved so much and he found it endearing how eager to learn she was. Glenn was better now, as were the rest of them and it was nice for the six of them to just spend time like this relaxing and act like they were normal people in a normal world.
“Daryl, walk with me for a minute?” Daryl looked up hearing the voice and saw Carol. He wondered what the fuck he had to walk with her for but nodded, kissing Zoey's cheek before he stood up. They walked down the street a little before Carol stopped and Daryl quirked a brow at her.
“The fuck we here for?” he asked impatiently, his eyes drifting to Zoey who was now sat on one of the fold-out chairs smiling with Maggie.
“Because I’m worried,” she stated firmly making him squint at her.
“About what?” he frowned, shifting on the spot. He really just wanted to get back to his girl.
“About you. About Zoey. This whole thing’s ridiculous Daryl, you can't keep doing this to her,” the look on his best friends face made him bristle and he clenched his jaw.
“Doin’ what?” he asked harshly, his temper flaring.
“Locking her away. Now you’re following her everywhere? It's not right, she isn't your property and she isn't your prisoner,” she scolded.
He stood taller, trying to push the anger down. This was one of his best friends. He couldn’t deny the words fucking stung more since they came from her. Carol was concerned though. She had tried multiple times to see the girl when she was locked in the upstairs room of the infirmary and when she got home and Daryl wouldn't let her in. And now Zoey was leaving the house she had seen how Daryl followed her everywhere and shot dirty looks to most people if they came near her.
“I know she ain't and so does she. It ain’t like that,” he glowered, about to walk passed her but she stepped in front of him.
“Then what is it like Daryl? Because it seems just like it was before, maybe even worse,” she frowned. He shook his head as he shot her a look.
“We talked it out. We met in the fuckin’ middle. In case ya forget she almost died. So sorry for bein’ worried and for givin’ a shit!” he snapped, his nerves feeling rubbed raw at her tone.
“Daryl you know I’m not saying that. It's just not healthy. You two were doing so well and now look,” she sighed.
Zoey stood near Daryl's bike, tuning out the conversation of those around her. She looked over across the street seeing Daryl and Carol arguing and she frowned. She’d never seen them fight before and she didn't like it. She was about to go over there and try to calm them down when Spencer suddenly appeared in her line of sight, making her jump. She fucking hated it when he did that. She blinked at him, quirking a brow not needing words to ask him what the hell he wanted.
“I just wanted to check you were okay,” he said, giving her a weak smile.
“I’m fine. I feel better now. All clear,” she said softly, feeling uncomfortable at the interaction with someone she didn't really trust, nor like.
“I didn't mean that. I meant what happened the other day,” he said, giving her a weird look she couldn't place. She furrowed her brow as she blinked up at him.
“The other day?” she asked confused making him sigh.
“We all heard the commotion. I was worried about you. Needed to check you were okay, no black eyes or anything,” he said firmly. Her eyes widened a little as the penny dropped on what he was getting at and it made her own anger flare inside of her.
“I’m fine. He’d never hurt me,” she said sternly making him scoff. She knew Daryl wouldn't hurt her. Sure she got scared the other day but it wasn't that she was scared of Daryl and that he’d hurt her. It was more the feeling of being helpless and not able to leave that scared her. The residual fear from the things she had been through in the past.
“You really believe that? I mean look at him,” he said, his tone venomous as he glanced over to Daryl and Carol having a heated discussion.
“You’re an asshole,” she huffed as she walked back over to where the others were sat. They all looked at Spencer distrustfully, they’d heard what he’d said and none of them liked what he was implying or trying to put in Zoey's head. Daryl was their family. Sure he had a temper but he’d never lay a hand on a woman.
Daryl was unaware of what was unfolding not too far away from him as he heaved a sigh and wiped a hand over his face.
“I don’t think you’re a bad guy Daryl okay? I know you love her. And I know this is hard for you. I’m just saying give her a little space once in a while. You know she’ll be fine with me or Maggie. Let her have some girl time. It's not good for you to both be attached at the hip all the time,” Carol said softly as she placed a hand on his arm. He felt his tension melt away a little. Her words had hurt him but he knew she was just concerned. It wasn't like he was unaware he was shadowing the girl because he was shit scared of losing her.
“I know,” he mumbled, his shoulder slumping a little. Carol felt bad for him. She knew he was struggling to deal with all of this. It was hard enough for him just being in a relationship since it was new to him without adding all this on top.
She glanced over to the girl in question to see her glaring at Spencer as he said something. Carol frowned and tapped Daryl's arm. When he looked at her she gestured with her head over to them and Daryl looked over. He tensed. He could read Zoey like a book and not only was she uncomfortable, she looked mad. And that made him mad.
“C’mon,” he huffed, stalking over there with Carol in tow. She had a feeling something was going to go down but she didn't say anything. Spencer was an asshole if she was honest and she was protective of Zoey herself. Hence why she just lectured her best friend about giving her space. If Spencer was giving her trouble she’d gladly let Daryl hand his ass to him.
Daryl stormed over and just as he reached the driveway, he heard words that boiled his blood as well as Carols.
“You think he won't hurt you? It's just a matter of time. He has a temper. I know guys like him. It starts with just words but sooner or later he’s gonna hurt you,” Spencer jabbed, his tone cold and harsh and Zoey clenched her jaw and glared at him. The others cringed, seeing Daryl as he stood there behind him. It was like time slowed down and Zoe's eyes almost bugged out of her head as Daryl grabbed Spencer's shoulder, turning him around. Daryl's fist collided with his face knocking him off his feet. Daryl pounced on him, grabbing the collar of his shirt.
“Yer right, I do have a temper, but I ain’t touch no one that ain’t deserve it and I sure as fuck ain’t hit no damn woman,” Daryl growled, raising his fist to hit him again. It was like he had tunnel vision. All he could see was this smarmy prick who was trying to tell his girl he would hurt her and it made him more mad than he'd ever been. His fist hit his jaw once more before he felt hands on him, struggling to drag him away in all his fury.
He could just about make out the frantic pleas of those around him but through it all he heard her. He heard Zoey begging him to stop and it was like the cloud lifted off him and he stopped struggling against the hold Abe and Rick had on him. Spencer lay on the floor groaning, his jaw and eye already swollen. Everyone was staring at him and when he turned his eyes to his girl she had a look on her face he couldn't quite read. And that bothered him. He always read her perfectly.
“My house, now,” Rick growled at him, feeling as he stopped fighting them. Daryl gave the girl one last look, watching as some people helped Spencer to his feet. Daryl trudged off after Rick, his hand hurting like a bitch.
When they got to Rick's house he gave him a look that made him avert his eyes. He knew he was about to get an ear-bashing. Rick had that cop look all over his damn face.
“You wanna tell me what the fuck that was about?” he asked incredulously, making Daryl scoff and shake his head.
“Prick got what was comin’ to him. Goin’ round tellin’ people bullshit. Tellin’ Zoey I’mma end up hurtin’ her cause I got a temper,” he glowered.
“So what? He’s goin’ around tellin’ people you got a temper and the logical thing in your mind is to pounce on him and beat the shit out of him? To prove him right?!” Rick was shouting now and it startled Daryl a little. He felt like he was being scolded by his father and he sneered at him.
“Ain’t nothin’ logical about it. I got mad. He’s gonna stand there and make my girl feel uncomfortable like that? I could see it all over her. He’s all up in her space spoutin’ off bullshit like I’m some woman beater!” he fumed, glaring at Rick. Rick shook his head before wiping a hand over his face.
“This isn't the way to solve things brother. You come to me if you have problems with someone here. Me! And I’ll deal with it! You don’t go around beatin' the shit out of people here Daryl!” Rick hissed, making Daryl clench and unclench his fists by his sides.
“I ain’t gotta do shit! If some prick went up to Michonne and started spewin’ all this bullshit you’d beat ‘em to the ground! Actin’ like ya ain’t got no damn temper of ya own when ya beat the fuckin’ shit outta Pete for what he did!” he yelled, stepping closer to Rick as he squared off with him.
“I snapped. And I shouldn't have. That ain't the way we solve things here anymore. You’re my best friend, my brother. I love you like my own blood but I’m the leader here Daryl. Best remember that. You haven't been the same since she got sick and this is gettin’ out of hand. Don't make me separate you both, brother,” Rick said carefully, his voice low.
Daryl looked at him with burning fury behind his blue eyes and Rick swallowed thickly. He really thought he was about to get a punch to the face too but this shit needed to be said. Daryl was simmering with rage. Everyone fucking talking shit about him like this, like he was some God awful person. It was gnawing away at him. Fueling the bad thoughts about himself that had been pushed away because of Zoey. She made him feel worth something. Like a good man. Now he was back to feeling worthless and nothing more than a piece of shit. He stepped right into Ricks personal space and Rick stood tall, trying not to let it bother him even though he had to admit he did feel intimidated.
“It’ll be a cold day in hell ‘fore ya take her away from me, brother. Ya took my kin away from me once, I ain't gonna let ya do it a second time,” he snarled low, his voice rough as he looked at him. Rick shook his head, his words making his heart ache a little. He’d always felt guilty for the Merle thing. Leaving him there on the roof to die like that. Sure he got away but everything that happened after, Merle being involved with the governor, his death, he knew it was on him.
“I need you, Daryl. You’re my right hand. I can't have you doin’ this, scarin’ everybody. I get you got mad. I fuckin’ get it. But I need you on board with this. I can't run this place by myself,” Rick sighed, looking defeated. Daryl's words seemingly taking the wind right out of his sails. Daryl looked at him for a minute, his own heart weighing heavy. He didn't fight with Rick often and never like this. He hated fighting with him. He hated dragging up the past because that's what it was. The past. They were both different people now and they had forged a bond despite all odds and Daryl felt a kinship to the man like his own flesh and blood. But the threat of him taking Zoey away made him feel murderous.
“Just keep the prick away from me and Zo and we won’t have any problems,” he huffed, glaring at him one last time before he stormed out. He almost slammed the door but in the back of his mind, he thought of little Judith who was no doubt sleeping upstairs.
As he walked back down the street he just felt like shit. His anger ebbing away and being replaced by shame. He knew what he did wasn't really the right thing to do but he hadn't been able to control himself. Zoey's obvious discomfort coupled with the pricks words had him seeing red. The people walking around stared at him cautiously and he sneered to himself. People seemed scared of him now. Of course he had to fuck all this up. Zoey was nowhere to be seen and he was worried what she would say when he saw her. The shame only got worse and by the time he entered the house, he wanted to crawl into a hole a die.
Now this story is complete and I’m just posting these chapters for you, I’m re-reading Let The Flames Begin so I can get in the right headspace for the sequel.
For some reason, I’m starting to struggle juggling life stuff with my writing and also my art. I’m usually okay with kind of having certain times for certain shit but lately, I feel like I have no free time at all. I’m trying to organise my shit again so I can get back to everything being stress-free and not pulling my fucking hair out.
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A week had passed and Zoey was now home. She had been feeling much better but Denise wanted to keep her in a little longer to check she would be fine. Now she had the all-clear and she was finally home. Daryl hadn’t left her side at the infirmary, almost reverting back to how protective he used to be when she first got there. He refused to speak to anyone and hadn't left the room unless it was to get her food or to take a fucking piss. Other than that he was right by her side and slept in the bed with her. He was needy, very needy and even Zoey noticed the shift in him. He had almost lost her, he had come so close to losing her like all the others he had lost and it scared the shit out of him. This new world was a fickle bastard and things could change with a blink of an eye. He had been feeling happy and then it all changed. As much as he had some hope now that things were getting better, he still had that deep fear in his bones now. He had thought she was safe inside the walls, and she was when it came to the dead or people. But not things like this. Anything could happen. An accident, illness, so much bullshit that could take her away from him.
She had been home a day and Daryl had not let her leave the house. He had refused any visitors too when Carol or Maggie ended up at their door wanting to see her. Rick was worried, it was like going back in time only this time it seemed even worse. Zoey was sat on the bed with a book but she couldn't focus on it. She knew Daryl meant well but she was starting to feel like a prisoner. She wanted to leave, to walk around in the fresh air, to speak to those she had grown close to. But he flat out refused for to her leave. She had gotten dressed feeling up to leaving the house today but when she asked Daryl to come with her to see Carol he said no. He told her they were staying in and his tone made it quite clear he wasn't joking. She didn’t like this, feeling trapped. He was so on edge she felt nervous about arguing with him and just as he reverted back to his old ways, so did she. She felt more anxious now, like she’d took a few steps back and was now the meek girl that was too scared to say anything to anyone.
She wasn't that girl though, not anymore, and she knew that deep down. She wasn't about to be locked away like this, not again. She knew he didn't mean any harm by it but she needed to fix this before it all got out of control. She set the book down and walked downstairs. Daryl was in the kitchen cleaning. He had spent the day cleaning the house from top to bottom with bleach and she hated the smell, it reminded her of a hospital. She knew her being sick had really done a number on him.
“I’m going to see Carol,” she called out, her voice firm as she started to walk to the front door. She heard his heavy boots hitting the floor behind her when he suddenly grabbed her wrist, turning her to face him. His face was like thunder and she swallowed thickly as she braced herself for what she knew was coming.
“Like fuck ya leavin’ the house. Get upstairs and rest,” he demanded roughly, making her bristle at his tone. She had to remind herself he was acting this way because he was scared. He loved her, he had told her as much and he had almost lost her. That didn't mean she had to lay down and take his bullshit though. She needed to show him this wasn't okay. He clearly wasn't thinking straight.
“No. I’m going out,” she countered, standing up a little taller as she looked at him defiantly. He clenched his jaw and growled as he let her arm go, standing up taller himself almost like he was trying to assert dominance over her. As much as she liked him taking care of her and being dominant, pushing her about wasn't going to fucking happen. Never again would she let a man treat her that way. She was stronger now.
“I ain’t gon’ ask ya again. If I have to carry ya up those damn stairs I will,” he threatened as he glared at her. It was getting harder to remind herself why he was acting this way, she just knew she didn't like it.
“I’m not your prisoner Daryl. I’m a person. I can do what I want when I want and right now I want to leave. You’re fucking suffocating me!” she yelled, her frustration pouring out of her. She watched his face as it fell and he took a step back, the lightbulb flicking on for a brief moment on how he was making her feel. She saw clearly the second the mask slipped back in place though and he clenched his fists by his side.
“Ya think I’mma just let ya out there to get sick again? Or for somethin’ else to happen?!” he shouted, chest starting to heave as his emotions weighed heavy on him. He didn't want her to feel that way but he couldn't control how he was feeling either. He couldn't stop the desperate fear that was clawing at him that he would lose her and his sanity may have been lapsing just a little.
“You can't wrap me in cotton wool forever Daryl. How the hell do you think I feel every time you leave the walls? Putting yourself in bad situations where anything could happen? I don't ever make you stay here though, do I?” she asked, shaking her head at him. She didn’t know how to get through to him and she really wanted to talk to Carol or Rick about it. Daryl started pacing, his fists clenching and unclenching by his sides as he started to unravel in front of her. Deep down he knew what he was doing was shitty of him, especially after she just told him she felt like a prisoner. He knew what she had been through, he knew he shouldn't be making her feel that way. But the stronger part of him was fighting to keep her here with him and only him. It was the only way to really make sure she was safe, that nothing would happen to her. He hated that she was right. Every time he left it was clear she was terrified and didn't want him to leave but she never kept him here. She most definitely didn't refuse to let him leave like he was doing to her.
“Get upstairs Zoey,” he demanded, his voice rough and low as he looked at her with his jaw set. Her nostrils flared a little in annoyance as she glared right back.
“I said no,” she refused, glaring at him.
“Get yer ass up the damn stairs!” He yelled, agitated by her refusal to just do as he fucking asked so he could keep her safe.
“I said no!” she yelled back, hating how he was talking to her.
He rushed at her, ready to throw her over his damn shoulder and haul her ass back up to the bedroom when suddenly the room filled with a resounding smack as her hand collided with his cheek. He stepped back, shock all over his face as his hand came to his now stinging cheek after she literally smacked some sense into him. She blinked at him, hands shaking and her chest heaving. She hadn't meant to smack him so hard, or at all really. But he knew better than to do this to her after the shit she had been through. She had been scared, actual fear running through her.
“Don’t you ever try to manhandle me like that again,” she growled, her venomous tone shocking him and making his heart ache. The look she was giving him was the most painful thing he had ever endured. He saw how upset she was with him and he also saw the fear. He wanted to kick his own ass for putting that look on her face. He lowered his head, tears breaking free as he shook his head. The real emotions breaking through the mask of coldness and the anger. The emotions that were seared into his heart from the very moment Rick had told him his girl was sick and he wouldn't be able to see her.
“I can’t… I can’t lose ya… I don’t…” he lamented, not able to get his words out as he crumbled in front of her.
Her fear subsided as she watched him breaking down, once again remembering why he was acting this way. She still wasn't impressed with him though but she did feel bad for him.
“I get it. I know you’re scared Daryl. How do you think I feel every time you leave the walls? Or when Maggie told me you’d gone to an overrun pharmacy without so much as a goodbye? I know you’re not used to dealing with this kind of stuff but I’m not gonna stand here and be made to be a prisoner all over again. Not from you,” she frowned, her voice cracking at the end as her own tears threatened to fall. He looked at her through his hair and her heart ached at how sad he was. The shame that was radiating from him. He sniffled and wiped his eyes and she stepped forward wanting to comfort him but he took a step back and shook his head. He didn't feel like he had the right to touch her, to be comforted by her after how he had behaved. He knew everything she had been through yet he had lost his grip on reality for a brief moment. He had scared her and he hated himself for it.
He felt the anger building up at a rapid rate and Zoey watched carefully as he yelled out in frustration, turning around and kicking the coffee table. The noise made her flinch but she wasn't scared of him. She knew this wasn't directed at her, she knew he was angry at himself. He stormed into the kitchen, rage and fury pouring out of him as he started trashing the place. Throwing chairs, plates, anything he could get his hands on. She rushed over with wide eyes, grabbing his arm. He whirled around to face her, a complete mess as the wave of intense sadness overtook him. She wrapped her arms around him, stroking his hair as he buried his face into her neck and cried like a small boy. He would hate himself later for it but right now he couldn't even get a reign on himself. He felt so many fucking things, none of them good and he didn't know how to deal with it.
She held him for a little bit as he just cried and cried, stroking his hair trying to soothe him. It was hard to witness him like this, so out of control and not being able to do a thing to help him. She heard a knock at the door and she tensed a little. She had a good feeling who it would be after the racket Daryl just made. She moved away a little, leading him over to the couch to sit down. She leant down and kissed his forehead before going to the front door. Daryl wiped his eyes and sat there with his head in his hands as he tried to gather himself.
When she opened the door she came face to face with a worried looking Rick, just like she knew she would.
“We heard all the noise, everything okay in there?” he asked concerned, his eyes flitting over her shoulder to Daryl who sat brokenly on the couch. It didn't take a genius to figure out something was going on. The house was a shambles and Daryl had clearly been crying. Zoey glanced at Daryl before slipping out onto the porch and shutting the door. She told Rick was transpired between the pair and Rick listened intently. He wiped a hand over his weary face with a sigh when she was done.
“Alright listen, go and see Carol. I’ll talk to him,” he said, making her look at the door worried for a second.
“But he didn't want me to leave the house,” she frowned. Rick shook his head.
“It’ll be fine. I can handle him. We need to fix this before it gets worse,” he said firmly, making her nod. She knew he was right after all. She looked at the door one more time, feeling bad for leaving but she really hoped Rick could talk some sense into him. She scurried off to see Carol.
Rick heaved a sigh, bracing himself before he walked in. He knew Daryl had been worried after what happened but he couldn't behave like this.
“Where’s Zo?” Daryl asked as soon as Rick came in without her. Rick could feel the tension in the room a mile away and it made him wary of what a delicate situation this was.
“I sent her to see Carol, we need to talk,” he said using his stern cop voice on him. Daryl growled as he stood up so fast it made his head spin for a second.
“Ya did what?!” he roared, his temper flaring that Rick had just sent his girl off like that. Rick didn't even flinch at the raised voice and he walked over to stand in front of him.
“Sit down, we need to talk,” Ricks tone left no room for argument and despite his temper flaring, Daryl found himself complying as he sat down and glared at him. Rick sat in front of him on the coffee table like he had done when Zoey was sick and he looked at Daryl with a heavy sigh.
“Do you wanna lose her Daryl?” he asked carefully, his voice low as he levelled his gaze on him. Daryl tensed and sat up straighter as he glared harder at him.
“Ya fuckin’ stupid? Ya know I don’t, why ya think I don’t want her leavin’ the house?” he spat, unable to quell his irritation at the man he considered his brother.
“I don't mean that Daryl. I mean, do you wanna lose her?” he repeated. Daryl squinted at him until it clicked in his head just what he was getting at. Rick didn't mean by death or sickness or any other means like that. He meant did he want to lose her, have her walk away from him and their relationship because of his behaviour. The thought felt like a bucket of ice-cold water had been thrown on him as a new fear gripped him. He wouldn't blame her if she left him. He had treated her poorly as a result of his fear. Even after knowing what she had been through.
He lowered his head feeling ashamed of himself once again. It seemed to be the theme of the day apparently and he shook his head as his heart constricted painfully in his chest. Rick nodded, patting his leg a little as he saw he broke through to him.
“You can't do this Daryl. It's normal to feel scared, but this? Lockin' her away? Not lettin' her leave or talk to anyone? How's that any better than her old group?” he asked him, making him feel like a scolded child as the shame intensified. He knew what he was getting at though, she had told him she felt like a prisoner so he knew Rick was right.
“Ain’t mean to make her feel that way man, I just… got scared,” he admitted, all the anger seeming to evaporate from his body. Now he just felt defeated and sad. He couldn't get the image from his mind of the fear in her eyes as he rushed at her. The sting on his red cheek evidence of just how scared she had gotten. He wished she had punched him, broke his fucking nose or something. He deserved worse.
“I know you did brother. And so does she. When I told her to go to Carols she didn't even wanna leave you after all this. But you gotta use your head. Things are gonna get pretty toxic if this keeps up. She's been doin' so well Daryl, I don't want her to go back to how she was and I know you don't either,” Rick said softly, watching as Daryl finally met his eyes and sighed.
“I just couldn't control myself. Ain’t used to all this bullshit,” he huffed with a frown.
“I know. But you need to learn to talk. All you needed to do was sit down with her and be open with how you felt and work it out together. The key to relationships is communication,” Rick continued. It was like he was imparting his wisdom onto him but Daryl needed it, he clearly couldn’t do this on his own.
He would end up losing her, after all they’d been through in a short space of time he would just lose her, and not in the way he had been so concerned about. She would willingly walk away from him. And he would have to live here seeing her and knowing how badly he fucked things up. She deserved so much better than this. Than a Dixon who couldn't fucking control his damn temper. He needed to make it right. He needed to fix it and be better at this bullshit. One day she would get sick of him. She would wash her hands of him entirely and he’d have no one but himself to blame. Rick was right with everything he said. And as stubborn as Daryl was, he knew if he didn’t take the advice of his brother then he would regret it for the rest of his days on the earth.
Sorry updates have been slow. I have fibromyalgia and I’m having a really bad flare-up. I’m having to take more of my pain meds which are super strong so they’re knocking me on my ass and I’m struggling to just function as a human right now loool
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When they got inside the gates Daryl felt the relief flood his body. The first pharmacy had been a bust, they had managed to get in but there was nothing left. The second one was a gold mine though but it hadn't been easy. He was thankful Aaron was with him and the three others were competent enough to help. If he had been stuck with assholes that hindered him and getting the meds back to his people, he might have just left them behind. The three others had distracted the walkers in the parking lot letting Daryl and Aaron slip in. It was dangerous but it worked. They dispatched the few stragglers and got to work. Daryl had a list of the shit they needed but he grabbed a bunch of other shit too in case they needed it. He had no plans to return here.
He jumped out of the car, a bag slung over each shoulder as he all but ran to the infirmary. Rick was sat on the steps looking forlorn and Daryl's heart sank. Rick frowned when he saw him and stood up, walking over.
“Did you get them?” he asked hopefully, making Daryl nod feeling pleased he had done his job. He handed the bags over to Rick and watched the relief pass over his face. But then it was replaced with worry.
“We need to talk,” Rick said carefully and Daryl stood up taller like he was bracing himself for bad news,
“He dead?” he asked, his voice wavering a little. Rick knew he was referring to Glenn and he shook his head feeling upset and worried about the words about to leave his lips.
“Brother… Zoey’s sick,” he lamented, so much pain behind his haunted eyes as he watched Daryl’s face fall.
The usually stoic man was able to hide his emotions well but right now Rick saw every single one that passed on his face. The main ones being fear and heartbreak.
“I need to see ‘er,” he said firmly, his voice rougher than usual. He went to walk past but Rick sidestepped him, making Daryl growl as he glared at him.
“I can't risk it, Daryl. You know that. She's in safe hands and we have what we need now. She should get better,” Rick said cautiously.
“Should? Man, that ain’t ‘nough for me! Let me see ‘er!” he roared not caring who heard him at this late hour as he went to move passed. Rick blocked him again, his face sterner now. He knew he was hurting and he got it, but he wasn't letting him in.
“I said no! We need you here Daryl. Safe and well. I ain't riskin' you gettin' sick too. I know you’re worried, I get it. But there ain't nothin' else we can do right now but get the medication to her and hope it works,” Rick hated that he couldn't just let him in, but if Daryl got sick and he ended up dead, it would be a huge loss for him and not something he was willing to go through. Maybe he was being selfish but he didn't care. They needed him here.
“I ain’t even say goodbye to her ‘fore I left. I need to see her. Rick… if anythin’ happens to her… I can't…” he shook his head as he lowered it, his lower lip quivering a little at the pain settling deep into his bones. Rick stepped forward and put a hand on his shoulder, tilting his head as he tried to catch his eyes.
“Look, if she gets worse I’ll let you in to talk to her. But I think she’ll be just fine. Go home and get some rest alright? I’ll be there to keep you updated on any changes,” Rick said, his voice low and soothing. Daryl knew he was using his diplomatic cop voice on him but he couldn't bring himself to care. He was hurting and he couldn't even go to see her. He nodded and trudged off back home. She was sick and the last thing she needed was him causing a huge scene outside just to get in to see her.
He hated that he hadn't said goodbye to her. He knew she would have been worried about him. And then she was sick all on her own without him there to help her. He sat on the couch, head in his hands. He wouldn't be able to sleep, he knew that much. He needed to stay awake in case anything happened. He really hoped they got the meds back in time and that she would be okay. The thought of her getting worse, of having to go in there to say goodbye, it made him feel sick. He couldn't lose someone else. He just couldn't. Each loss was getting harder and harder to cope with now and Zoey meant more to him than anyone else. He hated that he hadn't told her how he really felt about her, unaware he actually had.
Dread settled like a heavy weight in his stomach as the bunny hopped over. He picked it up and set it on his lap as he stroked it. It was her bunny, the one she had saved. She was far too compassionate and caring for this new world even after all she went through but that's why he loved her. He couldn't find a word for how he felt about her, love didn't seem to cut it for him. He never thought he would feel this way about anyone, but he wouldn't trade it for the world. And now he was at risk of losing her, losing his lifeline.
Hours passed with him sat here staring into space. No one had come to talk to him but it was relieving. No news was good news. The door suddenly opened and Rick came in and Daryl watched him as the bile rose into his throat.
“She's fine,” Rick said instantly as he shut the door. Knowing Daryl would be expecting the worst. He came over, sitting on the coffee table right in front of Daryl who sagged in the chair. The relief was evident on his face that she was okay.
“We gave them all the meds. Now it's just a waitin' game to see if they work,” Rick said quietly, his face tired and worn. Daryl nodded as he looked down.
“The fuck happened?” he asked wearily.
“I don't know. Me and Maggie were outside the infirmary when she came over. We knew she was sick right away. She looked bad. She was coughing and coughed up some blood. Denise said it could have been from her throat with how hard she was coughin'. Then she passed out,” Rick explained carefully. Each word felt like a knife stabbing Daryl's heart. That he hadn't been there to help her at all.
“She was the last one to get sick. She's got more of a chance than anyone else of pullin' through this if the meds work,” Rick mumbled tiredly. Daryl chewed his thumb just looking down. Rick could see it all over him, that he was expecting the worst to happen, preparing himself for it. Rick leaned forward a little patting his knee.
“You gotta have hope brother. I know its hard. All the shit we’ve been through, all the people we lost. But you gotta have the hope she'll pull through. You gotta be strong. For her,” Rick insisted. Daryl finally met his eyes. It was hard to have hope. Hope never got him anywhere in life. But he knew what Rick was saying. He did need to be strong for her. He wasn't the one sick. She was probably terrified in there without him. He knew how much comfort she took in him. And he wasn't here to soothe her.
“She awake?” Daryl asked as he kept chewing his thumb.
“She’s in and out of it. Keeps askin' for you when she wakes up but then she's gone again,” Rick explained, his heart clenching at the guilt all over Daryl's face.
“As soon as she's out of the woods you can go and see her. But you know why I can let you go in yet right?” Rick asked with a frown. His own guilt eating at him for keeping Daryl away from the girl. Daryl nodded. He did get it. The last thing they needed was the whole community getting sick.
“Hows Glenn?” he stopped chewing his thumb because it started to hurt too much and went back to petting the bunny. Just like Zoey would do for comfort.
“He's hangin' on. His fevers pretty bad but Maggie and Denise are doin' all they can to bring it down,” Rick sighed. Daryl felt for the man. He looked so worn down and he knew he was shouldering the blame for all of this, despite the fact it was out of their control.
Days, four fucking days had passed and he hadn't been allowed to see her. They were all responding well to the meds, their fevers reducing, but it was slow progress and he still couldn't see her yet. He felt like he was losing his damn mind. Pacing around the house or harassing Rick for information about her and how she was. He knew this was how she felt every time he left the walls. Just cooped up in the house worrying like this. It made him feel so guilty for ever leaving. He knew what he was feeling now would only be a fraction of how she felt with her anxiety the way it was. Rick had told him she was awake now and she kept pleading to see him, it broke his heart. Luckily Maggie was there and she would sit with her and try to calm her down.
He got up and walked outside, ready to go and talk to Rick again, only to find Rick walking up his path. His heart sank again. It always did when he saw him now, expecting bad news. To hear she got worse or that she died in her fucking sleep.
“I spoke to Denise and she thinks you should be able to see her now. We put her in the room upstairs on her own. Because she was the last to get sick, she responded quicker than the others to the meds. We didn't want her to get sick again so she's on her own out of the way,” Rick explained. Daryl felt like he might cry out of relief and nodded, all but running to the infirmary.
When he got there he walked right in, giving Glenn and Maggie a nod as he walked past. Glenn looked better, not as sick as Rick had described and Daryl was glad it seemed like things were looking up. He took the stairs two at a time, the nerves and excitement of seeing her overwhelming him. He opened the door and walked inside, watching as she sat up straighter looking like a spooked animal, the fear all over her face and it broke his heart. Seeing her after convincing himself she was going to die made his heart shatter in his chest and he ran over to her. He wrapped his arms around her, crushing her in a hug as he tried to stop the onslaught of tears that were fighting him. She sobbed helplessly as she clung to him like a lost child and it only hurt him more.
He moved to sit on the bed, still holding her as he stroked her hair, burying his nose in it and letting her scent soothe him. She was okay and alive. They were silent as she cried and he fought his own tears, soaking each other in. They both knew the gravity of the situation and it had jarred them both. When she finally moved away she wiped her watery eyes as he looked at her. She still looked a little paler than usual, he dreaded to think what she looked like when she was worse.
“I missed you,” she whispered, her voice shaky and rough sounding from all the coughing she had been doing. His heart squeezed in his chest.
“I missed ya too,” he replied, his own voice thick with emotion.
She took his hand, shaking her head as another sob left her lips and she kissed his knuckles affectionately. It seemed to be something she did a lot and it always made his insides turn to mush. She had been so frightened here without him. Being kept away from him like this was her own personal hell. Finally seeing him again made her feel all sorts of things and she was overwhelmed.
“I love you,” she blurted, looking up at him so earnestly he felt like the air got sucked out of his lungs. The words caught him off guard. He knew he felt that way about her but he hadn't told her yet because he was convinced she wouldn't feel the same. And now she was outright telling him. It felt like a flock of birds were in his stomach, fluttering as they tried to escape. The worry and fear of losing her was still bubbling under the surface and her words seemed to break the dam. He lowered his head as a choked sob left his lips, his chest heaving. She watched him forlornly, her own tears trailing down her cheeks. She was nervous that he hadn't said anything but he was so sad it was killing her.
“I love ya too,” he sobbed brokenly, trying to tell his brain she was okay, that she wasn't going to die. That he wouldn't lose the most important person in his life. Her heart expanded at his words and she pulled him closer, kissing him softly. Denise had told her she shouldn't be contagious anymore and she was glad. She had needed Daryl more than anything. When they broke apart he rested his forehead on hers, his chest still heaving as he tried to calm himself.
“I thought… “ he couldn't even finish his sentence, the thought hurting him in every way. He shook his head as he tried to suppress another sob.
“I know. But I’m here. You're here. We’re both okay,” she soothed, stroking his cheek and making him look at her. He inhaled deeply, leaning into her touch as it grounded him. Bringing him back to the here and now where they were indeed both fine and well. He gave her a little smile as he hand came up and buried itself in her long dark hair. The air around them felt lighter now they knew how they felt about one another. Like the heavy burden of keeping it to themselves had been lifted.
Daryl never would have thought she felt the same way, he would have told her sooner if he knew. He still didn't understand it. How someone as amazing as her would want him. Yet here she was, with him and declaring her love for him. It made him feel good. Maybe things were looking up for once.
“You know, you actually told me you loved me the night you got drunk,” she said with a wry smile as she wiped her eyes, trying to lighten the mood. Now he had said it back to her she felt like she could mention it. He squinted a little, his brain suddenly remembering and his cheeks tinged pink as she laughed lightly.
“You fell right asleep too so I never had the chance to ask if you meant it,” she smiled softly, still holding his hand. He looked at her, leaning in and brushing the tip of his nose against hers.
“‘Course I meant it. Didn't mean to say it when I was drunk but I fuckin’ meant it,” he whispered, her breathing hitching a little at their closeness. It always made her head spin. He captured her lips in a needy kiss. One she willingly melted into as she kissed him back. They had been used to being separated for days when Daryl left the walls but this was different. Daryl had put himself in huge danger and she had been so sick they didn't know if she would pull through. They had missed each other and both dealt with their own worries.
They were panting when they broke apart and she opened her big blue eyes to look into his. Daryl’s lips quirked into a smile, one she mirrored as she just stayed close to him, wanting to soak him in as much as she could.
“I love ya,” he murmured against her lips, feeling so fucking wonderful and light that he could freely say that now without worry. The amount of times he had almost just blurted it out to her when the feeling overwhelmed him. She grinned at him, her cheeks a pretty pink colour.
“I love you too,” she replied with a smile, making a warmth spread through his chest. He was so grateful she was okay. Grateful it looked like Glenn would be okay and the others. The good thing was that they had grabbed so much medication that if something like this happened again, they would be prepared next time and hopefully it wouldn't get this bad.
He remembered what Rick said about having hope. Something he never had in his life because he always felt like it was pointless. But now he found himself with a little spark of hope in his chest. Hope that things were getting better. Hope that he would be able to live out his life here with his girl and they could both be happy. That he could truly be happy for once. Maybe this hope thing wasn't so bad after all.
Angst? I don't really know what to label this. Sadness? Hurt? Drama? looool
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When Daryl woke the next morning, his head was thumping. He groaned and rolled onto his side, his hand blindly reaching out to find his girl, only to find an empty bed. He cracked open his eyes, wincing a little at the light as he glanced around like she would just appear. He huffed to himself before sitting up, rubbing his tired eyes. How much did he have to fucking drink last night? He hadn't had a hangover in the longest time but he hadn't drank in quite a bit. His body clearly wasn't used to it. The last thing he remembered was being sat on the porch with Zoey and after that, it was all blank.
He got up and slipped on some sweats and a vest, not having any intention of getting fully dressed just yet. He walked downstairs and when he got to the bottom, he could smell food. He glanced over to see Zoey in the kitchen cooking. She was fully dressed, jeans and a tank top, her hair up in a ponytail and he wondered just how long she had been up. He prayed he hadn’t made a dick of himself when he was drunk the night before.
He walked over and she turned to look at him, a bright smile gracing her face. It made his insides feel like jelly and he smiled back, his heart swelling. It always did when he was around her.
“Morning sleepyhead,” she snorted, making him huff a laugh as he closed the distance between them and kissed her lips sweetly. She gave him another smile when he moved away and he sat at the table. His head was still hurting and he jumped when a glass of water was placed in front of him with a pill. He hadn't expected her.
“For your head,” she said softly, kissing the side of his head before moving back to finish the breakfast. It wasn't anything fancy. They didn't have fancy stuff anymore. So some scrambled eggs would have to do. Daryl washed the pill down and finished the water in a few long gulps, watching her with a trace of a smile on his lips. He wasn't sure what it was but seeing her cook in their kitchen always made him happy. She just looked so at home there. She was a damn good cook. He loved anything she made him. Not the baking though. She wasn't that great with that one. He always got roped in to help clean the mess too when she tried. Hurricane Zoey left quite a mess in her wake.
She set the plate in front of him before sitting opposite him, the pair started to eat their food.
“How d’ya know I was hungover?” he asked curiously, shovelling a forkful of eggs into his mouth as he glanced at her.
“You had quite a bit to drink last night,” she snorted. Despite how calm she appeared on the outside, inside she was a nervous wreck. The words he said the night before were pinging around her brain. He hadn’t mentioned it and didn't seem overly shy or awkward so she knew he didn't remember. She really wanted to ask him about it, if he meant it. But she didn't know how to. If she did he would get embarrassed, maybe even lash out like he always did when he was overwhelmed. Or if he didn't mean it and it was just drunk ramblings, she would embarrass herself. Her nerves were on edge but she kept her smile in place not wanting him to pick up on her nervous energy.
“Didn't do nothin’ stupid did I?” he asked warily making her grin at him and shake her head.
“No. You behaved yourself. Except for trying to sleep with me when we got home,” she said with a wry smirk, it growing when his jaw practically dropped and the tips of his ears turned pink. He knew he was a horny bastard when he’d had a drink and he shouldn't have been surprised. When he was drunk it seemed to be the only time he was overly confident with girls. But this wasn't any girl. It was Zoey. Sure they were together but they were supposed to be taking things slow.
“Shit Zo, m’sorry,” he frowned, shaking his head as he lowered it like a child being scolded. She just laughed and he looked up at her again. He expected her to be upset with him but she looked amused.
“You don't have to be sorry Daryl. If you weren't drunk I would have gone for it. But I want you here completely when it happens. Not drunk off your ass,” she smiled, making his heart flutter in his chest. Her cheeks were a little pink, matching his own at her words. She basically just told him she was ready and the fact she wanted him to be sober and there with her like that, it made his heart grow even more. He chewed his lower lip and ducked his head with a shy smile, back to being shy and awkward with the topic at hand. It was fucking ridiculous since they were together now.
Most of the day flew by without event, the pair just snuggling up on the couch with the bunny after Daryl got dressed as they talked and just enjoyed each other. Zoey went upstairs to sort out clothes for laundry and she heard a knock. She couldn't hear the conversation but she heard Rick's voice. No doubt checking in on everything. When she came down with a pile of clothes in her arms, Daryl was nowhere to be seen. She blinked and looked around before shrugging as she walked into the kitchen. She was getting better at being calm when he wasn't here as long as he was in the walls. She knew he would come back to her.
Daryl stood outside the infirmary with Rick, his heart sinking with each word the man said.
“How bad is it?” he asked warily, watching as Rick frowned and sighed.
“Real bad Daryl. I don't know what to do. It's the whole supply team, I don't have anyone to get the meds. And Glenn…” he looked pained as he swallowed thickly and Daryl's heart seized up. They were sick, the supply team were all badly sick including Glenn. It made him feel faint, flashes of the prison swirling around his brain. Sure he cared about the others. He had grown fond of the little community they had here. But Glenn was his brother, he was family. He had been there from the start of all this.
“What d’ya need?” Daryl asked, willing to do anything he needed to in order to help.
“The meds. If you could get them, I’ve already asked Aaron and a few others. But we need you man, I know I can count on you. They've already got the car ready and waitin' for you. There's a couple of pharmacies around here, Glenn said they were overrun but ...we gotta try somethin',” Rick sighed, wiping a hand over his weary face. He didn't know what to do. This was his community, this was all on him. He wasn't going to let a repeat of the prison happen. Not now, not ever.
“Alright,” Daryl nodded, glancing over to where Aaron was stood by the cars as the others got in. They needed to get these meds and now, he didn't even have time to see Zoey or grab his usual shit. Every second they stood there was a second Glenn and the others were getting worse.
He walked over and Aaron looked grim as he gave him a weak smile. Daryl nodded before getting in the car. He and Aaron worked well as a team and they were used to going out there, being in dangerous situations. He knew they could both lead the team of people with them to get what they needed. They didn't have a choice. He wasn't coming home empty-handed. He didn't have his bow but he had his knife. And he knew that Aaron would have packed the usual bag of weapons and ammo like he usually did when they left the walls. It was always a precaution if they needed it.
Zoey was washing the dishes feeling anxious. It had been over an hour that Daryl had left the house without a word and she was getting worried. Rick had no doubt asked him to do a guard shift but it was so unlike him to leave without a word to her. Something felt off and she didn't like it. She decided to go and find him, to make sure everything was okay. She dried her hands on the dishtowel and walked over to the front door when it suddenly knocked, startling her. Whenever someone knocked it always surprised her for some reason and she stood glaring at the door like it was poison before it cracked open. A distraught looking Maggie walked in and Zoey's heart dropped at the sight of her. She was sobbing and she hadn't ever seen her like this before.
“What's wrong?” Zoey asked as she rushed over to her, wrapping her arms around her without thought as the woman cried and clung to her.
“Glenns sick,” she sobbed, making Zoey’s heart drop even more. Daryl had told her about the prison and what happened there. Things weren’t like they were in the old world. Something the doctor could fix with a quick pill wasn't an option anymore.
“Oh my god Maggie. Is it bad?” she asked warily, blinking at her as Maggie moved away and wiped her eyes and nodded. Zoey's heart was breaking for her. Maggie was family to her now, so was Glenn.
“It's the whole supply team. It's some kind of virus. Ricks got them all quarantined in the infirmary to stop anyone else gettin' sick. I’m so worried Zoey, I don't know what to do. It's like the prison all over again,” she choked out. Zoey swallowed thickly as she led her to the couch to sit down, running off into the kitchen to get her a glass of water. She wished she had something better to offer her but she didn't have anything else.
“I hope Daryl and Aaron find the meds at the pharmacies nearby. Glenn mentioned they hadn’t been looted yet, too many of the dead. Hopefully they'll find what they need and come back soon,” Maggie said before sipping her water gingerly. Zoey's heart stilled and she frowned. He was out the walls, going somewhere overrun and he hadn't even told her, not said goodbye. Maggie watched her face fall and her eyes widened.
“You didn't know he’d gone?” she asked, feeling bad now she had just blurted that out. She presumed he would have told her but she guessed they were in a hurry. Zoey tried to get a reign on the fear gripping at her tightly. Maggie needed her to be strong, she needed to be there for her. She could fall apart when she left. Daryl was out there, putting himself at risk in the worst way but Glenn could die too. She had to ignore the anxiety building at a rapid rate in her chest.
An hour later and Maggie had left. She had cried some more, told fond stories to Zoey about how she and Glenn fell in love and Zoey had let it distract her enough to calm herself temporarily. But now she was alone she felt like she couldn't breathe. Maggie had said Glenn and the supply team hadn’t looted the places because there were too many of the dead. Daryl was walking into a death trap and she knew he was a stubborn little asshole and he wouldn't back down even if they needed to. She felt sick, she had felt sick as soon as the words left Maggie's mouth. She walked into the kitchen and splashed some water onto her face. She was feeling hot and dizzy, her anxiety getting the best of her. He hadn't said goodbye. She didn't have time to prepare for this.
She dealt with it when she had warning that he had to leave. Rick had always been good at letting them know days before he wanted Daryl to leave so she had time to adjust and get herself ready. But this suddenness of him leaving, without even a goodbye, she wasn't ready for it. She felt like she was drowning. She swayed a little on her feet, getting hotter by the second and then she started coughing. Her whole body tensed, the realisation that she too was sick. Her mind cast back to the party when she ate the cake Glenn had been eating, using his fork. She must have caught it then. Her head was feeling fuzzy as the fever set in out of nowhere and her ears felt weird, like they were stuffed full of cotton balls. She needed to get to the infirmary. She didn't want anyone to get sick because of her and she needed help. She was feeling worse by the second as it all seemingly came out of nowhere.
She left the house, stumbling almost like she had one too many to drink, her ears muffled. The fever felt like her skin was on fire and a light sheen of sweat coated her head. Rick was stood outside the infirmary talking to Maggie and they both looked as the girl approached. Ricks's eyes widened a little at the state of her and Maggie's heart sank in her chest. It was clear she was sick like the others. She had just been there with her and she was fine. It was the same with Glenn. He had been fine one minute and the next violently ill. Zoey stopped a few feet in front of them as another harsh cough wracked her small body. She covered her mouth with her hand and when the coughing stopped, her heart stilled seeing the blood on her hands.
“Shit,” she heard Rick mutter before everything went black and she hit the floor with a thud.
Rick and Maggie ran over to her. They had both been exposed to the sick and they didn't care. Maggie was helping in the infirmary now. She hadn't caught it yet so it looked like she wouldn't. She didn't know why it was only some people getting sick, maybe their immune systems were lower. Rick too took it upon himself as the leader to be in there with the sick and oversee everything. Rick scooped her up in his arms and rushed into the infirmary, placing her on the spare bed. Glenn was sat up in the bed opposite, pale and weak. He shook his head, a lump in his throat when he saw Zoey being carried in. It hurt him deeply. He liked her and he knew Daryl cared deeply about her. She had become part of them, their family. Daryl was finally happy and everyone was happy for him, and now it might get taken away. Glenn knew Daryl wouldn’t recover from it if she died and it hurt his heart. He knew his wife was thinking the same as they locked eyes and Maggie shook her head as tears stung her eyes. Daryl was going to lose his shit when he came back and found out she was sick.
Rick pulled the blanket over her as Denise rushed over, hooking her up to one of the IVs they had to keep her hydrated and giving her something for the fever. It wasn't what they needed though. They needed the antibiotics and quick. Some of them were getting worse and she was worried they wouldn't make it. She was doing all she could to hold off the fevers and keep them comfortable but it wasn’t enough. Rick sighed as he sat in the chair beside the bed, taking her hand in his. It was clammy and he swallowed thickly. Everything was falling apart around him. He had left the kids with Michonne under strict instructions not to let them leave. He and Maggie had quarantined themselves in a house right by the infirmary. They weren’t sick but they could be carrying the virus since they had been around the sick people and he didn't want to take any chances. He hadn't even wanted Maggie here but she ignored him and came in anyway. She knew how to help, she had learnt a lot from her father. He would have done the same, he had done the same at the prison. She was going to be here and help as much as she could, especially with her husband being among the infected.
There was a heavy silence in the air as Maggie and Denise rushed around making sure everyone had what they needed and checking everyone was still alive. Rick sat there, his heart feeling like it was being weighed down as he glanced around the room of sick people. His people. Glenn, his brother, the man who saved him. If it wasn't for him he never would have made it to Carl and Lori. God knows where the hell he would be now. And now Zoey too. Daryl would be devastated if anything happened to her. He knew without a doubt his brother loved her. The change in him since Zoey got here had been huge and had not gone unnoticed by him or anyone in the original group. They'd never seen him this happy before and after all he had been through, all he had lost, he fucking deserved it. It was like life wanted to just shit on him constantly and Rick dreaded Daryl returning, when he would have to tell the man that the girl he loved was seriously sick and he couldn't see her. He couldn't risk Daryl getting infected. He was one of the strongest people they had and his most trusted. He didn't believe in God anymore. He found it hard to believe a god would sit there and watch this unfold like this and not do a thing to help any of them. But still, he found himself praying. Praying for things to get better, for no more people to get sick, for the people who were already sick to get better and pull through. If there was a God, he needed him now desperately.
I’m coming back today as I’m posting this to add this author note. I finished this story guys. Chapter 19 will be the last one and I just finished it. I just need to edit it. I feel sad it's over but I’m excited now this book is closed so I can start the sequel to Let The Flames Begin because I’m so hyped to get on with that one now.
Also, don't come at me for the timeline for what I do in this chapter. TWD timeline is fucking insane. I researched the shit out of it and even tried to digest a tweet AMC confirmed that makes no sense to me about how little time has passed since the start of the outbreak to Alexandria. So honestly, if this time doesn't make sense, I give no shits. I’m making it up as I go.
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Carol gasped as she walked into Daryl and Zoey’s house, staring at the girl with a slack jaw.
“What the hell happened to you?!” she frowned, rushing over and setting some ingredients on the counter as the girl blinked her blue eyes at her. She was covered head to toe in flour and the kitchen looked like a tornado had ripped right through the place.
“In my defence, I did tell you I couldn't bake worth shit,” Zoey said sheepishly, giving her a wary smile. Carol snorted and shook her head. To her credit, she had vehemently warned her that she couldn't bake. But Carol had thought the girl was simply being modest. Zoey was a very good cook. Carol had often been invited over for meals with her and Daryl, and Carol was often left impressed with her skills. Baking though, well that seemed to fall short of that skill. When Zoey had baked with Maggie, Carol was unaware that Maggie had given her the simplest tasks to complete after herself finding out just how bad the girl was.
“What’s… you have batter in your hair,” Carol muttered with a wry smile making her blush.
“Look, go upstairs and just shower, get ready for the party, I'll rescue the cake,” Carol said as she shoved her lightly towards the stairs.
Zoey didn't need telling twice. She knew she would fail at the task of baking the birthday cake and she hadn't been wrong. She was happy to get the fuck out of dodge and just get ready. It had been just over a month and things had been going well. Things were calm, or as calm as they could be during the fucking apocalypse. Her relationship with Daryl was blossoming more and more every day and despite the dead walking around, she couldn't remember being this happy before.
They hadn't had sex yet, they were still taking things somewhat slow in that department. It didn't stop them doing other things like a couple of horny teens though whenever they got to bed at the end of the night. They had passed the hurdle of being fully naked with one another. It had been hard for her to deal with but Daryl had been patient. She had done it in her own time and even though she was still majorly self-conscious. He worshipped her naked marked up body with such reverence that she found herself feeling comfortable with him, even with all to see.
Daryl had started being more affectionate with her around others too. Before they were even a thing, when neither of them even knew what the strong bond between them meant, they had both been close, not hiding it as they didn't realise it was what it turned out to be. But once they realised they cared for each other, once they became a thing, Daryl had withdrawn a little in public with her. She hadn't been offended in the least. He was a private person and it didn't take a rocket scientist to see how guarded he was with others, how he kept them at arm's length. Maggie had told her he hadn't been interested in anyone since his group had known him and it made her feel special that he had been interested in her. But with time he started to warm up again slowly, holding her hand, wrapping an arm around her. He even kissed her briefly in the street a few times. All in all, progress was being made and things were looking up.
She still didn't speak to everyone here. She only spoke to those she felt she trusted, which consisted of Daryl's family and a few others. Denise had really helped her with her PTSD and her anxiety and she felt normal again. Something she at one point never thought possible. She also spent a lot of time with Aaron and Eric. Eric seemed to love throwing dinner parties for her and Daryl to attend, double dates he would call them. She really enjoyed their company though and Daryl was always so relaxed when they were with them too. Anyone would have thought there weren't dead people roaming around outside the walls.
Daryl still went out with Aaron but they hadn't brought anyone back yet. Daryl was very fucking good at reading people and the few people they had ventured across he had been firm that they didn’t make the cut to be here. He only wanted good people here. Around his girl, his family, Carl and fucking Judith. He was very selective on who he thought they should bring back and Aaron always listened to him. Zoey was getting better at dealing with the times away from him. Carol and Maggie would always keep her company and even Eric since his husband was the one out there with Daryl. She felt part of the family now, part of the group. She felt cared for and she felt fucking happy.
Today was Judith's second birthday. Of course it was most likely not the actual date, it wasn't like people could pinpoint it. But Rick had been keeping track of seasonal cycles and it seemed a good a time as any to celebrate it. Carol had asked her to make the cake and she had been firm she couldn't do it. Maybe next time she would listen. Daryl was out there with some of the others setting up some decorations outside. They were having a little party on the grass, a celebration of something so pure and wonderful. A little person that would be part of the future here at the community. Zoey loved how the whole community was rallying together to give the small girl a birthday party. Something that was once normal for everyone but now seemed void. She didn't know the date, she had no idea how many birthdays of her own had passed, how old she was now. But it didn't matter to her. Judith was just a child, she deserved things like these.
Once she was done in the shower, she got ready in a pretty black sundress with small purple flowers on it. She still had her boots on though, she didn't really have any other shoes and the ones got on runs were more practical than fancy. She towel-dried her long dark hair, leaving it down and letting it wave up like it naturally did before bounding down the stairs. She sat at the counter whilst Carol did the cake and when they were done, they both set off outside. The community was alive and bustling about as Zoey took it all in with a smile. People were setting up decorations and chairs on the grass and there was a little pile of presents. They were courtesy of the supply team, of course. Glenn had gone out on a run to a toy store just for that purpose. Rick hadn't been happy, chiding him for putting his life on the line to get toys, but Glenn had said he didn't care. The girl needed presents on her birthday. Daryl had also decided to go and Aaron even went with him. The small team had brought back quite a few toys and gifts for the little girl and now she would have things to open and have a birthday pre-apocalypse style.
She saw Daryl and she squeezed Carol's arm with a smile before walking over. He looked up from where he was tying balloons to one of the trees and he grinned at her, unable not to. He always fucking smiled like a dick whenever he saw her, shit was getting ridiculous.
“Ya make that?” he asked curiously as his eyes drifted over to Carol with the cake as the woman made her way over to Rick and Michonne. She snorted, she could see it all over his face that he was shocked at the notion. He was well aware of how she couldn't bake. She had tried to bake for him a few times and each time it looked like a bomb had gone off in a bakery.
“No. I tried but...you know how it is,” she grinned wryly, making him huff a laugh. Once the balloons were secure he stepped closer to her, settling a hand on the side of her neck as he leant down and captured her lips in a sweet soft kiss.
“Pretty girl,” he murmured against her lips, making her blush furiously and duck her head.
“Stop,” she whined with a snort, making him give her a toothy grin. It was a grin rarely seen on the man. A grin even those closest to him had barely seen grace his face in all the time they had known him. Yet now, whenever he was with her he seemed to be sporting it and his family couldn't help but feel anything but happiness for him whenever they saw that smile on his face. She looked up at him with a smile, the pair practically making fucking moon eyes at each other like no one else existed.
“Alright love birds, the birthday girl is on her way over,” Maggie teased as she walked past, poking Zoey in the side and making her squeak as she blushed. Daryl sneered at her playfully and Zoey smirked at him. They kept doing this. Like they forgot they were around people until someone said something. They just couldn't help it though, they seemed to just get lost in one another.
The day passed by without drama. Judith got to open her presents and the community felt lighter than most days, everyone enjoying themselves. Eating the food and cake Carol made and just enjoying the day. Zoey had stuck by Daryl's side the whole time and Zoey had watched with heart eyes when Daryl played with Judith, loving such a soft side to him. He was really good with her and she seemed to love her uncle Daryl. It was dark now as Zoey sat on the steps of Ricks porch watching everyone else. They weren't much for socialising so they kept out of the way but there enough to still feel a part of it. Judith was now in bed and it was just some of the adults milling about chatting and a few of them drinking. They had already worked out who would drink and who wouldn't, not wanting to get caught with their asses hanging out by having everyone shit-faced drunk.
She watched as Daryl walked back over with two glasses in his hands. She smiled adoringly at him as he sat next to her. He’d never get sick of the way she smiled at him, it made him feel damn good. A glass filled with a deep red liquid appeared in her line of vision and she eyed it carefully before looking back at Daryl.
“What's this?” she asked softly.
“Water...the fuck ya think it is? It’s wine,” he snorted. She squinted at him playfully with a huff.
“Alright, why are you giving it to me? I wasn't on the list to drink,” she clarified.
“S’fine, cleared it with Rick. S’just one anyway,” he shrugged, quirking a brow impatiently at her as he continued to hold it out to her. She took it and had a sip. It had been a long time since she had anything alcoholic and she was grateful Daryl had given her only a small glass.
“What have you got?” she asked him as she looked at his glass. It was a little bigger than hers and filled with a brownish liquid.
“Whiskey,” he smirked as he lifted it and she watched him take a swig of it. How did he look sexy even doing that?
“What a surprise,” she snorted. He huffed a laugh and bumped his shoulder with hers. Daryl was on the list. He hadn't asked to be but Rick was adamant he needed to let his hair down and have a break. Since Zoey made progress he was out quite a bit. Either on guard duty, recruitment trips with Aaron or supply runs when needed. He never seemed to stop and Rick wanted him to just have a good time and relax for once.
An hour later and her wine was gone. She wasn't drunk, not even tipsy but she did feel a small buzz and she felt a little more relaxed than usual. Daryl though was a different story. He seemed to have drink after drink, and for a while it seemed not to affect him at all. But she knew he was drunk the moment he had chosen to get up and socialise with people. She followed along, not really talking but watching him with a smile as he laughed with Rick and Glenn and just seemed more openly happier than usual. It was a nice sight to see.
She glanced around the community and looked over at Rick’s house. It made her smile to herself knowing Judith had a good day. It was nice to pretend that the world wasn’t in the state it was in.
“You wanna finish this? I don’t feel so good. I ate way too much,” she heard a voice from next to her. She turned and grinned at Glenn who held out the paper plate with a piece of cake on it.
“How much have you had?” she smirked as she grabbed the fork and shovelled some into her mouth. Carol was a really good baker, she was glad she failed to make the cake. Even if she managed to make one it wouldn’t have tasted anywhere near as good as this one.
“Five or six slices… maybe,” he snorted, making her laugh and shake her head.
“Ready to head home?” Daryl asked her after a while and she nodded. It was still taxing for her to be around this many people and she was tired now. He smiled down at her before he leaned in and kissed her. His kisses in public were usually sweet pecks of her lips. Short and brief but affectionate all the same. This time though, in the state he was in he seemed to kiss her harder, deepening the kiss as a hand wound into her hair. For a brief moment, she forgot about everyone else as she kissed him back, melting into him. They heard someone catcall from behind them and Daryl snorted as he broke away from her, ducking his head a little. Zoey's cheeks turned crimson at the very public display of affection but she didn't have time to be embarrassed about it as Daryl wrapped his arm around her shoulders and lead her home.
He was swaying slightly on his feet and she found it amusing as they walked home. Zoey scooped up the bunny before they went upstairs. She had started bringing the bunny in the bedroom at night not wanting her to be alone downstairs. Daryl always laughed at her for it but she didn't care. She put the bunny down and watched as she hopped over to Daryl.
“Go to bed bunny,” he huffed with a snort, making Zoey shake her head with a smile at him. He liked to pretend he didn't like the animal so much but she’d fucking seen him giving her a cuddle or two.
“Fudge. Not bunny,” she corrected teasingly, making him look at her and quirk a brow.
She wasn't sure if she was imagining it but it suddenly felt like the air had been sucked out of the room at the look he gave her. He looked like trouble and it made her knees weak.
“Uh-huh, is that so?” he asked, a devilish smirk on his face as he slowly walked over. She didn't know she was walking backwards until her back hit the wall and she squeaked. Her blue eyes wide but a slight smile on her lips as he got in her personal space.
“Cheeky lil thing huh?” he drawled as he leant his forehead on hers, hitching one of her legs up as he pressed himself against her. His large hand gripped her thigh and her breathing hitched as she blinked up at him. She was sure if he wasn't trapping her between him and the wall she would just swoon and hit the deck.
He leant down and captured her lips in a bruising kiss and she kissed him back just as hungrily.
“Want ya,” he purred against her soft lips, nipping at them and making a soft moan leave her lips. But as his other hand started creeping up her dress she tensed up and grabbed his wrist. He stopped kissing her but didn't move away, looking down at her with confusion in his eyes. It wasn't that she didn't trust him, she did, with every fibre of her being. Even when he was drunk. But she wanted him to be completely present and of a sound mind when they had sex for the first time, or even did anything sexual for that matter.
“Not tonight,” she muttered tensely, unable to look at him with her pink cheeks. He could feel how tightly wound she was and it made his heart sink. She looked like she was bracing herself for him to shout at her and it hurt him. He let her leg go and leant in to kiss her cheek sweetly before he took a step back.
She looked up at him warily and he gave her a sweet smile that relaxed her completely. Knowing he wasn't mad at her. He was patient and caring with her as he always was, she didn't know why she thought any different. Daryl took her hand and led her over to sit on the bed. He crouched on the floor as he took off her boots for her. He wanted her, Lord knows he fucking did, but not like this. He wanted her to want it, to one hundred percent fucking want it. Not feel forced or pressured or to do it to please him. He didn't want her at all if it wasn't when she wanted it and he hated how she seemed worried he would be upset with her over it.
She watched him with a smile as he removed her boots, loving how he always took care of her. He stood and started to undress and she followed suit. Daryl got into bed with his boxers on and Zoey slipped one of Daryl's shirts on, the one she seemed to have claimed for sleeping in. He never mentioned it though so she didn't think he was upset about it. She climbed into bed and was surprised when Daryl rolled over, curling around her as he snuggled into her. Usually she lay like that with him, her head on his chest. But apparently the alcohol in his system made him needy and she liked it. She grinned to herself as she threaded a hand into his hair and massaged his scalp, making him hum softly and snuggle into her more. She felt tired now after the events of the day and she closed her eyes as she felt herself relax completely lay with him like this.
“Night Zo, I love ya,” Daryl mumbled sleepily, making her body go rigid.
“What?” she asked, her voice a mere squeak. She knew she had heard right but she felt like he hadn't meant to fucking say it. She got no response and she glanced down at him.
“Daryl?” she asked carefully, her response was a soft snore and she huffed that he had gone to sleep after blurting out such a thing. Her mind was reeling whilst her stomach bloomed with butterflies and nerves. She loved him back, she knew that already. But she didn't want to just say it if he hadn't meant to say it. He was drunk, he wasn't thinking. He could have meant to say something else. But now she couldn't ask him because he was asleep. She’d just have to ask him in the morning about it.
Some shit you've all been waiting for. I hope you're all enjoying this story so far. I’m not sure how long this one’s gonna be but I feel like it might end soon-ish. Not quite yet but maybe around chapter 20? I don't know yet, it depends what happens. Sometimes my muse throws shit at me that goes off on a tangent loool
This chapter is just like over 3k words of smut. But I mean, it's finally happening so there you go :’)
Enjoy!
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Zoey woke the next morning feeling safe in Daryl's arms. When he hadn't been there, she had barely slept with her nightmares plaguing her. But she had slept soundly, feeling refreshed with him there with her. She lay there content as she woke up properly and then suddenly she was very aware of the bulge pressing against her ass. She expected to feel repulsed, to feel scared, but she didn't. She felt a strange tingling between her legs that she hadn't felt in a number of years.
Never would she ever have thought she would feel aroused again after all that had happened to her. Her body had healed fully in her time here but her mind was fragile. Yet Daryl made her feel safe, secure. Nothing was pressured or forced. And she found her body reacting to his in a normal way for people in a relationship and it made her blush. It was nice to know what she went through wasn’t affecting her to that extent. That she felt so comfortable with him that there wasn't any fear there with something like this.
She nibbled her lower lip as she turned in his arms, smiling to herself at his sleeping face. He looked so much younger when he slept, so peaceful. He was so handsome it made her eyes hurt. And he didn't even realise just how beautiful he was. She looked at his broad shoulders, she didn't think she’d ever seen anyone with shoulders like him. She felt that tingling again and she found her hands wandering his body as he slept. She palmed his cock through his boxers, butterflies blooming in her belly at the contact. The first consensual contact in a long while, and she enjoyed it. He hummed softly in his sleep and shifted against her hand and it made her cheeks heat up. She felt like such a perv touching him when he slept but she couldn't help it. Her body was reacting strongly to him.
Her big eyes watched his face intently as her hand slipped into his boxers, gripping his length as she started to move her hand. A low groan left his lips as he arched into her hand, his eyes fluttering open with a furrowed brow. He was confused, he didn't know what the fuck was going on but he knew it felt good. She smirked a little, stroking him a little faster and making him moan. He gripped her wrist, stilling her motions and she frowned at him as he blinked at her, his brain catching up with himself. She was fucking jerking him off and he felt like he’d woken up on another planet.
“Ya doin’ girl?” he asked, his voice rough from sleep as he stared at her. Her cheeks flamed red, unsure how to act. She hadn't really expected him to stop her.
“Well… I thought it was obvious,” she snorted, trying to cover her embarrassment as she looked at him. A deep frown etched onto his face and it made her heart sink a little.
“Ya don’t have to,” he sighed, making her move her hand away. The rejection stung like a bitch and she felt so fucking stupid.
“Sorry. I just… I shouldn't have presumed you wanted it,” she muttered as she sat up, ready to flee the room and hide in a hole for the rest of her days on the earth.
“Hey! I didn't say that!” he insisted as he sat up and grabbed her wrist again, stilling her before she dived off the bed. She was on her knees, unable to look him in the eye and he was kicking himself for not being able to vocalise shit better, for embarrassing her. She had caught him off guard and he knew this was a delicate situation.
“I do want it Zo...Just, I don't want ya to feel like ya have to,” he said carefully, making her look at him.
“I know I don't have to. That's the point. I wanted to. You make me feel safe, you make me feel things I didn't think I’d ever feel again,” she admitted feeling the embarrassment consume her whole at having to talk about it. She just wanted to touch him and not have to deal with awkward situations like these.
He licked his lower lip, digesting her words. It was weird to him that a girl like her would want to touch him that way but they were in a relationship, she must find him attractive. No matter how fucking bizarre that might be to him. The level of trust she was showing him with this was almost overwhelming. He felt bad for embarrassing her. He felt good that she felt safe with him like this. And it wasn't like he didn't want her. He did, fucking badly but he hadn't been sure how to make a move. He was fine making moves on girls when he was drunk, but he wasn't drunk and she had been through a lot. This was new territory for him.
“C’mere,” he murmured, blue eyes looking at her imploringly. She crawled back over to him, the excitement swelling inside of her again as he stared her down.
The look he was giving her made her feel shy almost. He was looking at her like he wanted to make her his next meal and it made her stomach flip around on her in a good way. The tension between them was thick and it reminded Daryl of when they would train together, how close their bodies were, how the sexual tension would ramp up until it was overwhelming. Now she finally wanted to do something about it and it gave him confidence. He pulled her close as he kissed her, stealing her breath away as she melted into him. The kiss was more heated than usual. They usually kept it tame, the pair of them wary of taking the next step. They weren’t wary now though and he was kissing her desperately and she moaned against his lips.
He moved her to lay on her back, breaking the kiss just because his lungs needed fucking oxygen. His hands slid up her sides and she tensed, grabbing his wrists and stilling his motions. He stilled completely, looking at her worried. He was scared she had changed her mind, that he had scared her. The last thing he wanted was for her to fear him.
“S’wrong?” he asked, concern lacing his voice. The thought of her being scared of him made his heart ache dully in his chest. He didn't like it at all.
“Can we just… keep the shirt on. Please?” she asked, her voice a mere whisper as she averted her eyes. Her cheeks were crimson. He looked down at her confused for a moment before realisation dawned on his face.
He wanted to argue with her, to tell her she was beautiful and it didn't matter about her marks. Of course they lit a rage in him when he thought about how they got there, but it didn't make him any less attracted to her. If anything they made him more attracted to her. They were a testament to how strong she was, that she was a survivor. He didn't argue with her though. He respected her enough to not push her. She wasn't comfortable and that was fine by him. He had been in the same situation with his own scars and he knew better than anyone how it felt, the shame that followed him.
He nodded, making her relax under him and he leant down, kissing her again. He could feel how her tension melted away and he was happy, glad to put her at ease.
“Ya trust me?” he rasped against her lips, his blue eyes looking at her earnestly. She nodded without hesitation and it pleased him greatly, making his heart tug inside of his chest. That look in his eyes was back, like she was his prey, and it only served to excite her.
He shuffled down and she watched him curiously as he settled on his stomach between her legs. His eyes never left hers as he stroked up her thighs, leaving goosebumps in their wake as she looked at him. He looked down then, making her blush at where he was looking. He nuzzled her thigh and she let out a noise between a squeak and a moan, it made him grin against her skin. He loved seeing this side to her. He could be bashful and shy about a lot of shit, but when he was turned on his brain would shut the fuck up for once. After waking to her touching him and her telling him she wanted this, he couldn't help the raging hard on he was dealing with. His confidence was up for once in his damn life and he was revelling in it. He’d never understand why she was with him, why she wanted him, but she did. He wasn't going to question it, he was going to run with it and make every moment count. She was sexy as hell and the sexual tension between them had been almost unbearable. Now he was finally getting what he wanted.
He ran his nose along her slit against her panties, her scent intoxicating him as he groaned. She was fucking soaked, even through her panties. Knowing he had done this to her made him feel fucking good and his cock was aching it was so hard. She bit her lower lip, her breathing ragged as the excitement ran through her veins. He didn't bother to take her panties off. He knew this was a big deal for her. This was the first time she had done anything like this after all she had been through. And after her being worried about taking her shirt off, he didn't want her to feel so exposed. Instead, he pushed her panties aside, leaning forward as his tongue darted out and gave her a teasing lick from her entrance to her clit. A needy moan left her lips and it was the sweetest fucking sound he’d ever heard. He wanted to make her feel good, to show her that it didn't have to hurt or feel bad. He wanted to erase all the bad shit that had happened to her.
With one hand hooked in her panties to keep them to the side, the other hooked around her thigh, her legs parted as he started swirling his tongue around her clit. Her body writhed as the pleasure overwhelmed her. It felt like her whole body was tingling, the pleasure building up already. She tasted fucking amazing. He’d always loved going down on a girl and it had been a fucking while since he’d had the pleasure. It was so much better than any other time though. It was with her.
He unhooked his arm from her thigh and slipped a finger inside of her, making her moan loudly. He was still conscious to be careful, knowing the shit she had been through in the back of his mind. She was tight and he found himself grinding against the mattress, seeking out friction before he fucking died with how much his dick was aching. He started fucking her with his finger as his mouth assaulted her clit. Alternating between teasing licks and then sucking on it greedily.
She was a writhing mess, moaning wantonly, unable to help herself at the feeling that was consuming her. She couldn't form a coherent thought, her body on fire as her release started to creep up on her. Her moans only fueled Daryl's ego, loving how good he was making her feel. She was soaked and he added another finger, feeling like she could handle it. A keening moan left her lips and he was almost startled by how loud it was for a moment. It was like a chain reaction though as her back arched and her body jerked as she came. He kept it up until her body went limp and he placed a soft kiss to her clit, making her whimper. He sat up, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand as he looked down at her. He couldn't help the smug smirk at the look on her face as she blinked up at him. She looked like she’d been to heaven and back and he was the one to make her feel that way.
She lay there dazed and gave him a lazy smile. She felt fucking amazing, on cloud nine and she was relishing in it. Daryl grinned as he flopped next to her on his side and she rolled to face him.
“That was just...wow,” she snorted with pink cheeks, making his ego inflate even more. He couldn't help the smirk as he leant down and kissed her softly.
“Glad ya enjoyed it,” he smirked, making her snort again. She stroked his firm chest softly and her hand trailed down, making him tense. He grabbed her wrist like before and she groaned in frustration.
“Let me return the favour,” she frowned at him, making him sigh.
“Ya don’t have to, not if ya don’t want,” of course he wanted her to, more than anything. He was sure his dick would fall off soon if he didn’t find release with how hard he was. But he was still so paranoid of the shit she had been through, of her feeling forced into shit. He wouldn't ever do that to her and he needed her to know she didn't have to do a damn thing if she didn't want to.
“I do want to Daryl. Please, let me touch you,” she pleaded, making him swallow thickly. Well shit if that wasn't the hottest thing he’d heard. Fucking begging to touch him. Any self-control he had flew right at the window and he found himself nodding, looking at her with a hooded gaze. She grinned triumphantly and he shook his head with a snort at her. She sat up, making him lay on his back. She looked at him and he couldn't tear his eyes away from her as she hooked her nimble fingers into his waistband and peeled his boxers off him, tossing them on the floor. He might have felt self-conscious but he was so turned on, his brain wasn't thinking, it wasn't being its usual asshole self.
She looked down at his hard cock, biting her lip a little at the excited tingle than ran down her spine. She leant down and their eyes locked as she gave him a teasing lick. He bit down on his lower lip with a groan. He was mentally storing these images away for if he ever needed them. This shit was hot as hell. She engulfed his cock into her warm wet mouth and his head fell back, lips parted with a moan at the feeling. It had been a long fucking time since anyone had even touched him, let alone sucked his dick. He knew he wouldn't be able to last long.
She started sucking his cock, head bobbing up and down as she took him in as far as she could, her soft hand at the base to get what couldn't fit into her mouth. He was moaning as he threaded a hand into her hair, hips arching just a little as the pleasure overwhelmed him.
“Shit Zo, fuckin’ close” he groaned, squeezing his eyes shut as the pleasure built up rapidly inside of him. He wanted to warn her, to give her the chance to move away before he came, not wanting to force her to let him cum in her mouth. She watched him as she worked her magic on him, smirking around him at seeing him like this. There was something so sexy about him lay there moaning and panting, watching him unravel.
His breathing was harsh and fast, eyes squeezed shut as he tried to hold off as long as he could. He never wanted it to end. He couldn't remember it ever feeling this fucking good when he had a girl suck his dick. The grip on her hair tightened a little as his body tensed. He felt like a string pulled so taut it was about to snap. She looked at him before taking him in even further, experimentally deep throating him for a moment. The string snapped and something akin to a loud growl left his lips as his body went completely tense. He spilled himself into her mouth, hips arching as she continued to suck on him, working him through his orgasm. When his body relaxed and sagged against the bed, she moved away, swallowing everything in her mouth. She wiped her mouth with her hand and looked at him.
He was sweaty, his hair stuck to his forehead as he lay there panting, trying to catch his breath. He looked beautiful, she smiled to herself as she admired him. He was like a dark angel. She moved to lay next to him and he opened his eyes, looking at her with so much adoration. Their connection felt even deeper now, their bond even stronger as one more hurdle was passed. She smiled sweetly at him and his heart clenched in his chest so painfully. He fucking loved her, he loved her so much it overwhelmed him. He smiled back, still riding his high as he pulled her to lay on his chest. She snuggled into him and sighed contently, the pair of them enjoying the closeness.
They knew they'd have to get up soon, but they wanted to enjoy the time they had here like this, in their own little bubble with just the two of them. He stroked her hair softly and nuzzled the top of her head. He felt so relaxed now. It had been a damn while since he came like that. Using his hand wasn't really the same as having a girl suck him off. Especially a girl like Zoey. A girl he was in love with.
“I don’t wanna get up,” she whined softly, making him huff a laugh at her.
“Let's just stay here for a bit,” he rasped, a content smile on his lips as he wrapped his arms around her. He held her for a bit before her breathing evened out and he looked down at her. She had fallen asleep again, worn out. He grinned to himself, holding her close and relishing the feeling of her in his arms. When the fuck had he ever felt this happy and carefree? Never. Not once in his life had he felt like this before and it was fucking glorious to feel this way.
His life had been riddled with pain and sadness, he didn't remember a single moment where he felt genuinely happy. And then this fucking angel comes into his life and turns it upside down. He felt like he didn't deserve her. He had failed so many people, just fucking failed them and caused so much shit to happen. But yet he was graced with her in his life. He’d never really grasp just why she wanted to be with him, but he had given up trying to understand it. She was here, with him, and that's all he needed. There wasn't a damn thing he wouldn't do to keep her by his side. It just felt right. It felt like she was meant to be there, like she had been missing all along. He never thought he’d find love at all, let alone after the world turned to shit. It was like she was the missing jigsaw piece in his life, the one he didn't even know was missing. He felt so complete with her like this. It was strange for him, to feel genuinely happy. It felt so fucking foreign to him now. But he liked it, he loved the way she made him feel. Like a real man, like a good guy. She was fucking everything to him.
He knew he loved her, he’d known for a bit now it must be love. He wanted to tell her, he found himself often almost blurting it when he was with her as she smiled at him like the sun shone outta his ass. He just couldn't bring himself to. As happy as he was, the fear of rejection still ran deep inside of him. He knew he was punching well above his weight with her and the fear that she didn't feel as deeply for him as he felt for her was a scary one. He could deal with it if he didn't know, he could pretend she did in his head. But if he knew for sure she didn't feel for him that way, it would cut him deep. He didn't know how she could feel for him like that, he thought he was a piece of shit. Yet she was here with him, trusting him so much with being so close to him. The confusion and fear of rejection were enough to firmly keep his mouth shut on the issue. Maybe he should talk to Carol and see what she said about it.
Sorry for taking so long to update. I was sick, got better for like a day and now I'm really sick again. Like really fucking sick.
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“You have everything right? Bow? Knife? Gun? And...and don't forget to take some food in case you get stuck out there,” Zoey frowned, nibbling her lower lip as she paced in the living room. Daryl watched her warily. He hated seeing her like this. It was like they’d taken ten steps back.
It had been over a week now and she had been doing really well. She still only spoke to a select few people but she was getting stronger day by day. She had been seeing Denise to help her with her PTSD and her anxiety and it had been helping. But now he was going out the walls with Aaron. They were going to see if they could find people to bring back. And the anxiety of him being out the walls without her for the first time had the girl back to being a nervous wreck.
He stepped closer, cupping her face to get her to still and look at him. She blinked her big blue eyes up at him and his heart ached at the fear he saw there.
“I’mma be just fine Zo, ‘right? I’ll be back in a few days,” he said softly. He hated leaving her at all if he was honest. Especially now they were together. He wanted to just lock them both away and spend every waking moment with her. But he couldn't. He had a job to do.
“You don't know that! Anything could happen to you out there Daryl. What if...what if you don't come back?” her voice cracked and he swallowed thickly, releasing her face as he lowered his head. He could see her fighting the tears and it hurt him. And she wasn't wrong. He couldn't promise her shit because he didn't know what would happen.
“Ya know I need to do this girl, don’t make this so fuckin’ hard,” he lamented, his heart squeezing so hard in his chest he thought it might burst. She sniffled, standing up straighter as she wiped her eyes. She nodded, trying to calm herself. She couldn't do this, she couldn't be selfish and stop him going out there because she needed him. She had worked so hard to be strong and now she felt like she was slipping back into her old ways.
“I’m sorry,” she mumbled, looking at the floor with red cheeks.
He frowned, pulling her to him as he rubbed the tip of his nose against hers.
“Ain’t gotta be sorry. Just promise me if ya need help ya’ll go to Rick or Carol,” he murmured, a hand coming to her face and stroking her cheek. He didn't want her hurting herself again. He didn't think she would, she had been doing a lot better. But he knew this situation was triggering for her.
“Promise,” she said, looking up at him and giving him a weak smile. He leant down, capturing his lips with hers. In the week that had passed he had gotten more and more comfortable kissing her, being the one initiating it.
She kissed him back willingly, melting into him and he loved it. It made him feel more confident with her because she always responded so well to whatever he did. When he broke away he kissed her cheek softly and took a step back. He slung his backpack over his broad shoulders and grabbed his bow. Fuck, this was hard. He really didn't want to go. Just as she was worried about him, he was worried about her. Anything could fucking happen and he wouldn't be here to help her. The last time he left the walls he had come back to find her a mess in the shower, and he had no desire to see that again. Especially not now. They were together now, their bond ran even deeper.
He swallowed thickly, wanting to go back over and wrap his arms around her but he knew if he did, he wouldn't ever fucking leave. They just looked at each other for a minute before he nodded, leaving swiftly. Zoey sat on the couch, scooping up Fudge as she hopped over. She could feel the panic bubble in her chest as she stroked her, trying to soothe herself. She had been doing so well and now it just felt like the desperate fear was back and she hated it. It seemed to hit her harder since she hadn't felt this scared in a while. This would be the longest she had been without him and she wasn't sure how the hell she was going to cope. Especially at night without him there to quell her nightmares.
She tried to distract herself with cleaning. Hours passed by and the house was spotless but she still felt restless. She flopped onto the couch and chewed her lower lip. She couldn't help but wonder about Daryl, if he was okay, where he was. It was strange now. They were together but it still felt surreal. They were taking it slow and it was progressing naturally, it just felt right. She never thought she would have felt this way about someone, especially not after all she had been through. But he made her feel so safe.
There was a knock at the door and she jumped, glaring at the door with worried eyes. It cracked open and she held her breath, releasing it as she saw Maggie peak her head around.
“Hey! Thought I’d come and see how you were doin’,” she smiled warmly as she closed the door behind her. Zoey liked Maggie. She hadn't spent a lot of time with her but she enjoyed her company when she did.
“I’m doing okay I guess,” Zoey sighed, furrowing her brow a little. She felt her cheeks flush a little that people felt the need to check on her, knowing just how dependent on Daryl she was. Maggie sat in the armchair looking at her sympathetically.
“I thought we could keep each other company. Glenn's gone too, on a supply run. I know how lonely it can get, and the worry,” she said softly, making Zoey look up at her. It was nice to have someone in the same position, who understood how she felt in a way.
“I'd really like that. I can't stop worrying about him,” she admitted sheepishly, rubbing her hands on her thighs with a sigh.
“I know. It's hard when you aren't there and have no clue what the hell is goin’ on. But I thought we could spend some time with each other, distract us from it,” Maggie smiled. Zoey beamed a grin at her, she was glad for a distraction and it was nice that it was with someone she felt comfortable with.
The girls distracted themselves and each other as they cleaned Maggie's house and baked things for the community. Carol even popped by to see how Zoey was doing and offered to take the cookies and cakes to people, knowing Zoey wouldn't be comfortable with it.
“You know, it's nice you and Daryl found each other,” Maggie mused as she wiped the counter down, it was covered in flour now. Zoey blushed with a smile as she continued to wash the pots in the sink.
“I know. I never really thought I’d find anyone again, not after all this. And then he just...happened. He saved me,” Zoey said softly before turning around. Maggie was smiling at her and it made her blush a little harder.
“I’ve never seen him like this before. He’s not been interested in anyone since we’ve all known him. He was so protective of you from the day you got here. It’s sweet really,” Maggie sighed wistfully, a smile on her lips.
“I didn't know what it was at first… this pull towards him. He was the only one who made me feel safe at all. I don't think I could ever show him how much I appreciate him. He’s done so much for me,” Zoey said softly as she sat on one of the stools at the counter.
“He has done a lot for you. But you've done a lot for him too. I think he really needed you here,” Maggie grinned as he reached over and squeezed Zoey’s hand. She smiled and ducked her head. The contact didn't make her feel fear or flinch away. She was getting better at all of this, returning to who she once was, and she had Daryl to thank for that.
Time seemed to drag on without Daryl there by her side. She had Maggie to keep her company, the girls talking about anything and everything and trying to keep themselves distracted. But by day two, Glenn had returned. Maggie still came in to try and keep her company but it wasn't the same anymore and her anxiety only continued to grow about Daryl being out there. She was scared. Anything could happen to him out there and she wouldn't even know. He just wouldn't ever come back. When day three came and went, she was convinced something bad had happened. Maggie had tried to reassure her, she told her Daryl and Aaron often came back a few days late when they went out. It didn't ease her worries any though. She knew he could look after himself, but it didn't mean he was invincible.
The sky was dark now and Zoey wiped her eyes. She felt like she’d cried the day away. The deep ache in her chest just seemed to grow with each passing minute, convinced he wasn't coming back to her. She was wearing one of his shirts, it needed washing but she hadn't washed it. It still smelt like him and she was clinging onto that with every bit of her being. She lay down in bed, a soft sob leaving her lips. Every time she thought about him not coming back to her it made her feel sick. She couldn't do any of this without him. She didn't want to. She loved him, she was sure of that much by this point. Being away from him made her feel like her heart had been ripped out and was out there with him. She curled up on her side as she cried to herself, convinced this was it now.
Daryl floored it on the way home. They’d been caught by a herd and had to hide out in an abandoned store. They hadn't recruited a single fucking person and he had been away from Zoey for far too long. He knew she’d be worried. He was worried about her. His mind flashed with images of returning to find the community overrun or something bad. He breathed a sigh of relief when they entered the gates and everything was as he left it. It was late now and he hopped out of the car with a brief goodbye to Aaron. Daryl knew Aaron was eager to get back to Eric anyway. They'd both been away from their loved ones.
He practically ran to the house, trying to be quiet in case she was asleep. He toed off his boots by the door, glancing to the sleeping bunny in the makeshift bed Zoey had made for it. It made him smile, she was always so compassionate. He walked upstairs, his feet light, just like when he was hunting. He frowned as he got upstairs and heard her crying, the noise making his heart sink. The fear shot through him that she was hurt or something had happened to her as he burst into his room, finding her curled up in his bed.
The noise startled her and she gasped as she sat up, looking alert and terrified. But as soon as her eyes landed on Daryl she dove out of the bed, almost launching herself at him. It caught him off guard, he stumbled back a little before he wrapped his arms around her with a frown.
“Hey, s’wrong?” he asked concerned, moving her away a little as his blue eyes scanned her tear-soaked face.
“I thought...it's been days… I didn’t think…” she choked out, not making much sense but he got the gist of it anyway. He knew she would be worried but he hadn't expected to come home to this. It broke his heart to see her like this once again, especially since he’d seen her come on leaps and bounds recently.
“M’here Zo, ya don’t need to worry ‘lright?” he soothed, his gravelly voice quiet and soothing as he wrapped his arms around her once again. He stroked her back as she clung to him like a child and cried. The relief she felt that he was back and unharmed was overwhelming and she couldn't seem to stop the intense emotion she was feeling. Daryl held her for what felt like forever. He was patient with her. He knew damn well if the roles were reversed, he would be a mess too. He hated that they didn't have phones these days, a way to tell her he was okay and was coming home to her.
When she finally cried it out, she snorted at herself, feeling stupid for being so emotional and clingy. He just smiled at her though as she took a step back, reaching out and wiping her tears away. He leant in and captured her lips in a sweet soft kiss. He‘d fucking missed her, he felt like he’d gone out of his mind being away from her for so long and he couldn't imagine how bad it must have been for her given her fragile mental state.
“Missed ya,” he said softly, feeling the tips of his ears burning at admitting such a thing. He was still getting used to this whole relationship thing.
She beamed a smile at him making his stomach flip around on him the way it always did. He couldn't help but smile back, she made him fucking happy and it was a weird feeling. He wasn't used to it.
“I missed you too,” she said, calm finally now she had it all out of her system and he was there with her. He knew she had missed him, his welcome had been evidence of that, but hearing her say it still made his heart beat all funny.
She took his hand and lead him over to the bed and it was then he noticed what she was wearing. His shirt, the one he had worn before he left, and nothing fucking else. He felt his body reacting and he mentally chided himself. She had just been a sobbing mess in his arms and now he was getting hard. He fucking hated himself sometimes. He couldn't help it though, not when she was wearing something of his. It always provoked a reaction from him, just like when she wore his jacket. It didn't help matters any that her bare legs were on display. He watched as she climbed into bed and he stripped off.
Normally when they slept together, she would be in her pyjamas and he would be in sweatpants and a vest. He was still self-conscious of his scars despite the fact she had seen them and hadn’t responded badly to them. But he was exhausted, it was hot and she was half-naked. His brain wasn't working very well and he stripped down to his boxers before slipping into bed. As she always did, she lay her head on his chest and he felt the warmth spread through his chest. It felt even more intimate now, her bare leg touching his, the lack of clothing. The exhaustion took hold of both of them though as they drifted off to sleep clinging to each other. Soaking each other in for comfort to help them get to sleep.
Thank you to everyone wishing me to get better, I love you all! <3
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The next morning when Daryl woke, he was startled to come face to face with a sleeping Zoey. He had forgotten he had asked her into his bed, and in his sleepy state, his brain was trying to catch up with him. He relaxed when he remembered and smiled to himself. She was so peaceful when she slept, so beautiful. He wanted to reach out and touch her, but he felt like he shouldn't. But when he focused on it, she was his girl. That's what he said to her and she didn't fight it, she blushed and smiled. They were in a relationship now, and by how she reacted to him in the kitchen, it was clear she felt the sexual tension too. He needed to get used to this. Affection and touching. He had done it with her from the start but now things were different with them, it felt like the little touches carried more weight and he was nervous about it. He hated how much he was overthinking it. His confidence the day before had paid off greatly, provoking the reaction he wanted from her.
He reached out, tucking her long hair behind her ear and she hummed softly in her sleep, making him grin. It was nice to be this close to her and to be able to just admire her without feeling like some fucking creeper now. Her eyes fluttered open and a lazy smile spread across her face when she saw him, it made his heart ache in his chest. She always seemed so happy to see him, he didn’t understand why.
“Mornin’,” he rasped softly, stroking her cheek sweetly. Her cheeks tinged pink which gave him that rush of satisfaction again as he watched her.
“I didn’t have any nightmares,” she stated, like she was in awe of the fact. Daryl's chest puffed with pride. She hadn’t had a nightmare, the first night since she stayed there she had a restful sleep and it was all because she slept by his side. He felt like he was on another fucking planet.
“Good,” he grinned at her, making her laugh lightly, a noise he loved so fucking much.
They watched each other for a moment, small smiles on their faces. Neither of them wanted to move and ruin the moment. It was nice just being so close to one another. Zoey nibbled her lower lip as she looked at him. The day before had her really worked up. The almost-kisses, his words. She felt like they would never get anywhere at the pace he was going and for once she wanted to be bold, to take what she wanted lest it never fucking happen.
She shocked him when she leant forward, her lips ghosting his like a feather-light touch. It took a moment for his brain to register what she was doing but he pressed his lips against hers more firmly, taking confidence in the fact she had been the one to kiss him. He shuffled closer as he kissed her slowly, savouring every second of it. She seemed to melt into him as she kissed back and he ran his tongue over her lower lip, wanting entrance to taste every inch of her damn mouth. He was more than pleased when she granted him access and he tangled his tongue with hers.
The kiss was slow and sensual and he felt his body reacting to it. He needed to stop, he knew he did. He didn’t want to make her uncomfortable or to rush this. He enjoyed kissing her more than anything in the world. He wanted to do this again, not put her off or scare her away. He broke the kiss and the pair were breathless, blinking at each other in slight wonder of how they felt. She beamed a smile at him with her pretty pink cheeks and he couldn't help it when his own lips quirked up in a smile. It felt like a milestone had been passed. A hurdle that they were too scared to jump over. But it was done now, he knew she enjoyed it, and fuck, so did he. Now he felt like he could kiss her whenever he damn well wanted.
She blinked up at him, working up the courage to ask him what she wanted to ask, she wasn't too sure how he would react.
“Do you think...I could go hunting with you?” she asked softly, making his eyes widen in shock for a moment.
“Ya wanna go outside the walls?” he asked hesitantly, making her sit up and toy with her hands. He sat up to look at her.
“I just...I need to learn. I know I’m not great at defending myself yet, but I’m getting better. And you’ll be there, I know you’ll keep me safe,” she murmured, making his chest feel tight. The fact she knew he would keep her safe made him feel all kinds of things. He felt proud and he resisted the urge to kiss her again. He wasn't sure how he felt about it. Her being out of the walls meant danger, but at the same time, she was right, she did have to learn. She wanted to learn to hunt, he knew he was the person to teach her that and it was skill people needed to know. God forbid anything ever happened and they got separated, she would be able to fend for herself. He knew he had to push his selfish intentions of locking her away aside because ultimately, it could cost her life in the end.
“Alright, I’ll take ya. Get ready and meet me downstairs,” he said, giving her a small smile. She beamed at him, practically fucking radiant and he almost melted in a puddle right there. Holy shit, I love this girl. She got up and bounded off to her room, leaving him smiling like a fucking dick as he got out of bed and got himself dressed. He was shocked when he went downstairs to find her dressed and ready before him. She really was eager. When they got to the gate, he could see her fidgeting and playing with her hands. He knew she was nervous but this was good for her, this would help. She had a knife on her and a gun. She knew how to use a gun, her brother had taught her when the world went to shit, he was glad she wasn't completely defenceless. When the gates opened, he looked at her and she nodded at him, inhaling a deep breath.
They walked through the woods carefully and Daryl was pleasantly surprised by how light on her feet she was. Rick was always loud and annoying when he came with him, scaring off all the damn game, but Zoey was silent and he was impressed. He caught a few squirrels and she watched on in awe at how easily he was able to use his crossbow. It was just second nature to him and he seemed so in his element out here. It made her feel a little guilty for having him cooped up looking after her.
“You're really good at this,” she said softly, casting him a glance and smile. He felt himself swell with pride once more and he smiled back.
“Thanks. Huntin’s been my whole life, guess I was made for this world,” he snorted, making her grin at him as they made their way back.
He was startled when she suddenly rushed off ahead of him and he frowned.
“Zo! What the hell?” he called after her, hot on her heels. He wondered what the fuck was wrong with her, if she was having an attack or something. But when he got to her, she crouched down and he realised what she had seen.
“They’re just babies,” she said softly, her face looking so forlorn his heart hurt.
“They’re rabbits, get outta the way so we can take ‘em home, be good for a stew,” he said gruffly, getting his bow ready. Her eyes widened as she stood, standing in front of the two baby bunnies defensively. Daryl squinted as he lowered his bow.
“You can't shoot them! Look how tiny they are! Can we take them back as pets? Please? Think of Judith, she would love them, and me,” she pleaded, giving him the puppy eyes. He grit his teeth, trying to quell his irritation. This was why he didn't take chicks hunting with him.
“Look Zo, I know they’re cute and all, but rabbits are food now, not pets,” he sighed, making her face fall. It hurt him, more than he cared to admit that she looked so sad and he was the cause. It caused him physical fucking pain in his chest and he hated it. She moved out of the way, looking defeated and resigned to it and he raised his bow, one of the baby bunnies in his sights. He couldn’t pull the trigger though, no matter how much he was willing himself to. He couldn’t fucking do it. Damn it.
He heaved a sigh as he lowered the bow, Zoey watching him curiously.
“Fine, take the damn bunnies,” he huffed, making her squeal with delight. He shook his head but he couldn't help the smile that graced his face as she picked them up, bunnies in her arms.
“They better not shit everywhere,” he snorted as they got to the gates, making her roll her eyes and pull a face at him. Carl was there holding Judith with Rick in tow and Carl walked right over with a grin.
“You found bunnies!” he laughed incredulously, making Zoey beam with pride.
“We did, you want one?” she asked with a smile, making Rick look to the bunnies sceptically. He cast a glance to Daryl who snorted and shrugged. Judith giggled when she saw the bunnies and reached out, poking one.
“Can we have one Dad, please?” Carl pleaded, looking at him the exact same way Zoey had looked at Daryl.
“Alright fine, but it's your responsibility,” Rick grinned, shaking his head. Zoey passed Rick a bunny since Carl was holding Judith and then they were off home.
Once they got settled, Zoey made the bunny a little nest. They didn't exactly have a hutch to put it in so it was just free to hop around the living room. The pair sat on the couch, Zoey watching the bunny happily while Daryl looked at her with a smile.
“What shall we call her?” she asked, looking over at Daryl. He blushed slightly feeling like he had been caught staring at her but she didn’t comment on it.
“I don't know...Bunny?” he shrugged, making her laugh.
“Bunny? You can't call her bunny, she is a bunny. She needs a name,” she snorted incredulously, making him squint at her.
“S’wrong with bunny?” he asked looking offended, it only amused her more.
“How about...Fudge?” she smirked, making him huff a laugh and roll his eyes.
“Fudge? The fuck kinda name is that?” he asked with a smirk, making her poke his side.
“A good name,” she stated, pulling her tongue out at him.
He just smiled at her and she blushed, he was staring at her and it was intense.
“What?” she asked hesitantly, feeling the weight of his gaze burning her skin.
“It’s just nice...seein’ ya like this. Relaxed...happy,” he said quietly, making her blush more and grin.
“It's all because of you,” she said sincerely, making his heart still in his chest. It was his turn to blush now and the tips of his ears turned pink as the gravity of her words hit him. He didn't even think about it as he leant down and captured her lips with his. She reacted instantly, kissing him back and he was pleased she hadn't moved away or flinched. He pulled her closer as he deepened the kiss, making her gasp as he kissed her with more need and want. When he pulled away, he rested his forehead on hers as they caught their breath. The both of them had been affected by the kiss, but they weren't quite ready to take it a step further, nor did they really know how to make the next move. They soaked each other in and he stroked her cheek and she smiled up at him adoringly, making him smile back.
He couldn't ever remember being this happy in his life, not once. When he looked at her, everything felt right. It didn’t matter the things he had done in the past, the people he had failed, the people he had lost. Everything felt right when he was with her. Like she soothed his wounds and took his pain away. He wasn’t quite sure just how the fuck he had managed to get her, how she cared for him at all, but he was grateful. It made up for his shitty life, having something as precious as Zoey in his life. He never knew he wanted this, having a girl. He didn't think he deserved it or was good enough. But Zoey was making him feel like a man. She made him feel proud of himself, made him feel good, and that was something in of itself. He had never felt that way, never felt a sense of pride at being a good man, being good at anything. And now she was here, making him feel things he had never felt before and it left his head spinning. She was everything he never knew he wanted and more, and he would do whatever the fuck it took to keep her.
Daryl's taut arm tightened around the girl's neck as she thrashed, trying to get out of the hold he had on her to no avail. He was clearly much stronger than she was and much bigger. The feel of the blunt stick digging in the side of her throat made her squirm more against him.
“Aaand ya dead, c’mon now girl, ya know better than to turn ya back on yer opponent,” he chided, letting go and giving her a light shove away from him.
Zoey panted, breathless and sweaty as she tried to catch her breath. Daryl couldn't help but let his gaze roam her body as it glistened, her chest rising and falling quickly.
He had been training her now for a few days on a patch of grass beside their house, away from prying eyes. He’d been teaching her how to defend herself first and he was glad he was, she wasn't very fucking good at it and she was making mistakes that would definitely cost her life outside of these damn walls. He bit his lip as he looked at her, remembering how good it felt, having her body pressed up against his like that as she squirmed to get away. He knew he was being a perv but he couldn't bring himself to feel guilty about it anymore, not now things had changed between them.
Their relationship, if it was even a relationship yet, hadn't gone much further than holding hands. They were just taking it slow, letting things happen as they did and they were getting more comfortable about the idea that they liked each other. They'd hold hands when they ate, and when they went for late-night walks around Alexandria. He enjoyed being able to be close to her without worrying he was being a creep. He had not taken into account how close they'd be when he was training her. He wasn't sure if he was the only one feeling the sexually charged energy every time they did it.
Zoey sat down and flopped onto her back ungracefully, making Daryl smirk at her a little. He sat down next to her, bringing his legs up and resting his arms on his knees.
“Jesus Christ, I feel like I’ve ran a mile,” She whined as she tried to catch her breath. Daryl snorted at her and shook his head, she did this every time and he couldn't help but think she was adorable.
“Quit ya whinin’, big baby,” He teased with a grin, laughing when he felt her poking his side playfully. She sat up and wiped her dark hair from her face, Daryl watching her flushed cheeks and glistening chest intently.
“I feel gross,” she complained as she started to tie her hair up so it stopped sticking to her sweaty body.
“Look fine as hell to me,” he hadn't meant to say those words. Of course he thought them but he wasn't meaning to so bluntly come out with something like that. His eyes widened a little and he looked down before chancing a glance to her. She was blushing furiously and smiling, a look he fucking loved on her. He decided he needed to be blunt with her more often if that was the reaction he’d get from her.
A few hours later, Daryl was near the gate talking to Aaron whilst Zoey spoke to Michonne near Ricks porch. Zoey was doing so much better now, even though she was still anxious, she really tried to make an effort with the people she had been talking to. The people that were closest to Daryl, and that made him happy. Now he didn't have that worry that her getting better meant losing her, he felt nothing but pride for how far the girl had come since she’d gotten there.
After Michonne went inside, Zoey was going to go and see Daryl and Aaron, but Spencer was suddenly in front of her.
“Hey, I don't think we've met yet, I’m Spencer,” he grinned. There was something about him that she didn't like. Not in a threatening way, but she could tell he was annoying as fuck. She gave him a polite smile, not feeling comfortable enough to talk to him, but he didn't seem to mind as he just kept talking about himself. She zoned out, not hearing a word he was saying. She was too busy thinking about training with Daryl. His arms were fucking ridiculous and feeling them around her, feeling his hard chest against her back and his sexy drawl in her ear when he was being all bossy, it was too much. She found herself blushing to herself and looking down, nibbling her thumb to try and hide a shy smile. Thinking about him was making her tingle all over and she wondered when they'd get to kiss or go further than holding hands. She didn't want to push him, knowing he was new to all this. Although she knew he wasn't a virgin, she couldn't believe he'd never had fucking sex. She had been through a lot, but Daryl made her feel safe. She never would have thought after what she went through she would have these urges again, but she did.
Daryl's eyes wandered over to Zoey, frowning when he noticed Michonne was no longer there but Spencer was instead. He felt jealousy build in his chest at the asshole talking to his girl. Ain't your girl asshat. He wasn't sure what she was, they hadn't really spoken about the status of the two of them and he hadn't officially asked her or anything. Was that still a thing? Or was it just a given since they admitted to liking each other? He didn't know, but what he did know was that he didn't like some dick talking to her and making her blush.
“The fucks he doin’?” he grumbled, eyes narrowed to slits as he glared at him. Aaron looked to where Daryl was looking and his eyes widened a little. The last thing he needed was Daryl beating the holy hell out of Spencer.
“Maybe he's just introducing himself,” he suggested, glancing from Spencer to Daryl nervously. Daryl tried to remember what Carol had told him about not getting mad. He wasn’t mad at her, not mad at all. But Spencer, right now he wanted to throttle the prick until he turned blue. He huffed, trying to control himself and stomped off back home before he murdered the boy.
When Spencer finally got the hint and left her alone, she glanced over to notice Daryl was now gone. She sighed a little before making her way home, hoping he was there. When she walked in, she saw him sat on the couch with his boots up on the coffee table, his broad arms folded across his chest. He looked moody and she quirked a brow at him.
“Hey,” she smiled, feeling awkward by his demeanour. He just grunted and nodded his head a little, making her frown and move to sit next to him.
“What's up with you?” she asked cautiously. He shrugged, trying to quell the jealousy building up in his chest. He didn't want to take it out on her again because it wasn't fair. She heaved a sigh and turned to face him, glaring at him a little.
“Daryl Dixon, don’t you dare. We agreed you wouldn't do this. There's something on your mind so just spit it out, because I swear if you yell in my face again, I’ll kick you in the nuts so hard they'll end up in your throat,” she huffed, making him look at her, his lips quirking into a slight smile. He couldn't help it, she was sexy when she was angry apparently.
“Makin’ friends with Spencer?” he tried to sound casual, to keep the edge from his voice so he didn't sound like he was accusing her of anything. She snorted loudly and looked at him incredulously making him narrow his eyes at her a little.
“Is that a joke? He's annoying as shit,” she laughed, shaking her head. She couldn't believe Daryl was jealous of the likes of Spencer.
“Didn't seem annoyin’ when ya blushed and acted all coy,” that time he couldn't help the edge to his tone and she squinted at him a little.
“I was blushing because I was thinking about how close we were during training,” she slapped a hand over her mouth, apparently it was her turn to blurt something bold. Her cheeks turned into a bright shade of red and a sly smirk spread across Daryls face at the realisation that she had been thinking about it too.
“Is that so?” he asked teasingly, loving that she was as much as a perv as he was. She blushed more and hid her face in her hands.
“Shut uppp. Like you haven't thought about it!” she whined before getting up and going into the kitchen to try and cool off. She couldn't believe she just said that to him. She stood by the sink as she tried to catch her breath.
Suddenly she was trapped by two large arms either side of her on the counter. She could feel Daryl's chest pressed into her back and his breath tickled her ear, it made her tingle all over. Daryl wasn't sure where this surge of confidence came from. Seeing her with another guy and thinking that he was making her blush, it unleashed something primal in him.
“I have thought about it...thought about ya body pressed against mine...feelin’ ya squirm against me,” he whispered huskily in her ear, making her breathing hitch. Something Daryl picked up on, it only gave him more confidence.
“Wanted to kick his teeth in, thinkin’ he made my girl blush. Ain’t no one allowed to do that but me,” he drawled. His words alone were enough to soak her panties and her chest was heaving as her whole body felt like it was on fire.
Daryl slowly dragged his nose from her neck to her ear, inhaling her sweet scent as he did. She let out a small moan that went straight to his dick, it was by far his new favourite noise. She turned her head slowly to look at him, they were so close his nose touched her cheek and then her own nose. He could see her flushed cheeks, her parted lips and hooded gaze. He loved how her body was reacting to him and he knew he'd have to do this again just to watch her like this.
“Your girl?” she whispered softly, her eyes fluttering shut as he rested his forehead on hers.
“Mhm, my girl. Mine only,” he hummed, rubbing his nose against hers. He leant down about to capture her lips for the first time with his but a knock sounded throughout the house. Daryl stilled and growled low in his chest, making her snort a little.
“Someone has great timing,” she smirked, making him shake his head and huff a laugh. He kissed the tip of her nose before reluctantly moving away from her, instantly feeling cold and empty. He strolled over to the door, hearing her follow as he opened it.
Rick stood there, glancing between the pair, noticing how flushed Zoey looked and the annoyed look on Daryl's face. He smirked slightly and quirked a brow.
“Sorry to interrupt, just wondering if you could take over the guard shift for about an hour,” he grinned, making Daryl narrow his eyes, like he knew Rick knew what he had interrupted. Before he could reply, Zoey spoke up.
“Can I come?” she asked hopefully, casting her eyes on the men with a smile. Daryl raised an eyebrow, she’d never asked to come with him before but he'd enjoy her fucking company. He glanced to Rick in question, he was the leader after all.
“That's fine with me, just keep your hands to yourself so you don't get distracted,” he smirked a little, making Zoey blush furiously and Daryl roll his eyes with a huff.
“Enough, asshole,” he snorted, making Rick laugh as he moved away and jogged down the steps.
On the guard tower, Zoey stood next to Daryl, his jacket around her small frame as he watched out for trouble. She liked wearing his jacket, it was warm and smelt like him. Like pine, smoke and something distinctly Daryl. He glanced over at her, a deep satisfaction building at seeing her in his clothes. He remembered the first day she came here and he’d let her wear it because she was cold, he knew then she looked fucking good in it. The sky was almost black, the stars and moon the only light on the two of them, a gentle breeze blowing Zoey's long hair a little.
“This is kind of romantic,” she smiled a little, casting a sidelong glance at him.
“Yeah, nothin’ like the sound of the dead to get ya in the mood,” he snorted, grunting lightly when she elbowed his side. He laughed and wrapped an arm around her shoulder, bringing her close. He didn't think about it, he just did it. And it felt fucking good. She buried her face in his chest, soaking up his heat and scent as she wrapped her arms around his middle. It felt natural, for him to hold her like this, and he nuzzled the top of her head and let the sweet strawberry scent fill his nostrils.
A hand came to her hair, massaging her scalp and making her hum softly into his chest. He couldn't suppress the grin as he looked out over the wall to keep an eye out, feeling like the luckiest asshole alive to have her in his arms. He felt a little more confident with her now, after her reaction to his bold words and his antics in the kitchen. Like it was the shove he needed to get over the hurdle of touching her, saying things like that to her.
The hour went by without any drama and before long, Abe had come to take over. Daryl saw his smug smirk when he noticed how close the pair were and he scowled at him, the tips of his ears turning pink.
“Not your girl my ass,” Abe chuckled under his breath, Zoey heard him and snorted a little, biting her lip to suppress her laughter as Daryl glared at her playfully.
“Shut up,” Daryl huffed, a half-smile on his lips as he made his way down the ladder. He felt smug almost, that she was his girl. Of all the guys she could have picked, it was him who she wanted. He didn't think he'd ever understand it, but he would fucking run with it.
He stood on the ground as he watched her descend the ladder, eyes drawn to her perfect ass. He bit his lip and as she neared the floor. He gripped her hips to guide her safely so she didn’t fall. She turned in his arms once her feet hit the floor and she blushed deeply at how close they were. Daryl's gaze was intense, the sexual energy between them both since the kitchen felt like it was an atomic bomb about to go off. His need for her was giving him more confidence, touching her in ways that he probably wouldn't if he wasn't so turned on. He'd be too nervous to try. She gave him a shy smile, looking at him through her long lashes and he almost fucking died at the pretty sight. He inhaled deeply, trying to get a hold of himself before he threw her on the floor and ripped her clothes off. He needed to reign himself in, take it slow. He knew the things she'd been through and he didn't want her to feel forced or rushed into anything.
Closing his eyes, he leant forward and brushed his lips against her forehead, making her sigh contently. She was enjoying this side to him, being so affectionate. It made her heart feel so full it might burst. He took her hand, entwining their fingers together before they set off home, a comfortable silence between them. They got home and went upstairs, knowing it was time to settle in for the night. They stopped outside of Daryl's room and looked at each other. Usually, this was where they parted ways, and Daryl would make the little makeshift bed on the floor for her. As much as he loved those moments in the morning, where he could openly admire her without feeling embarrassed, watching her so unguarded, he didn't like her sleeping on his fucking floor. Before now he'd been too nervous to broach the subject with her, he didn't want to embarrass her or for her to get upset if he offered her to sleep in his bed. But things were different now. They were in this...thing, whatever it was, relationship or not, and now the line had been crossed. It was weighing heavy on his mind.
She looked at him curiously as he glanced around, she knew he was working himself up to say something so she stayed silent, instead bringing his hand to her lips and placing a sweet kiss on his knuckles. The simple gesture made Daryl's stomach do flips, giving her a shy smile as he glanced at her through his hair.
“I uh...I don’t want ya sleepin’ on my floor no more,” he sighed, his voice rough as he chewed his lower lip with a furrowed brow. Zoey's hand dropped his as her face fell visibly, and Daryl knew he'd said something wrong and wished to fuck he could hop into a time machine and keep his mouth shut. He didn't know if she was upset with him for presuming she would be fine to sleep by his side.
“Oh...Okay. I’m sorry,” she mumbled, her cheeks starting to heat up. She turned around and started walking to her room, misunderstanding Daryl's words as him not wanting her there at all.
He frowned as he watched her walk away before he realised he had not been clear enough, he almost smacked himself in the head.
“Zo, I didn't mean... I meant...Jesus,” he couldn't get the words out like some damn nervous schoolboy. Merle would be laughing his ass off at him from beyond the grave right now with his inability to talk to a damn woman. Zoey turned to look at him, confused as she tilted her head. She watched him worry his thumb, cheeks pink and looking like he wanted the ground to swallow him whole. The penny dropped, or at least she thought it did, she didn't just want to hop in his bed without being sure that's what he meant, she felt like she embarrassed herself enough for one day.
“You mean...I can sleep with you?” she asked softly, trying to help him through his awkwardness and loss of words. She saw him relax a little that she had said the words he was trying so desperately to leave his mouth. He glanced at her nervously, before back at the floor.
“Only if ya want, Ain’t want ya to be uncomfortable or nothin’,” he shrugged, like he wasn't hoping and fucking praying she said yes, because he wanted to lay next to her and admire her, to feel her by his side so he could sleep easy.
He chanced a look her way to see her blushing deeply and biting her lip with a shy smile. He never got tired of that look from her and it made him dumbfounded every time that he had rendered her that way.
“I’d like that...a lot,” she admitted shyly, giving him a smile. He breathed a sigh of relief and gave her a toothy grin. It was strange seeing the usually moody man smile like that and her heart was hammering against her ribcage.
“Alright...Good. Just come in when ya ready,” he smiled with a nod before he slipped into his room. He scrubbed his hands over his face when he was away from her intense gaze, a stupid smile on his face that he needed to get ahold of before she came in and thought he was a fucking weirdo. He huffed a laugh at himself. Ain’t got no fuckin’ game man.
Zoey was wearing a matching grin as she made her way to her room and got her pyjamas on, she couldn't believe he wanted her in his bed. It wasn't even anything sexual that went through her mind. Just the thought of being so close to him, to stop the torment that plagued her each night, it felt like a weight had been lifted. She returned not too long later with her hair down and wearing some shorts and a tank top. She noticed Daryl lay in bed shirtless and she couldn't help but let her eyes roam his firm chest. He caught her staring and gave her a smirk, he didn’t think he’d ever get used to her looking at him like that. She snorted with a blush, rolling her eyes as if to say ‘don’t say a fucking word’, before she slipped into bed beside him. She didn't hesitate to move over, laying her head on his chest. He tensed slightly at the contact, but not because he was uncomfortable, quite the opposite. His hand curled around her and rested on her hip, his thumb stroking the sliver of skin that peaked out above her shorts.
He had to try and think of something other than her body pressed against his before his body reacted and she ran a mile. As much as he wanted to have his way with her, and he knew she wanted him that way too from how she reacted to him, he didn't want to push her, to make her feel rushed. He wanted their first night in bed together to put her at ease so she enjoyed just laying with him. But then she snuggled closer, hooking her leg around his and his breathing picked up just slightly. She was so soft and fucking warm. It had been forever since he’d been with a woman, and Zoey was no ordinary woman. He’d never cuddled with anyone before, and the simple contact from the girl was sending his body into a tailspin. Shit...uhhh...Rick...Rick’s stupid face...Rick’s hairy ass… He relaxed a little, thinking of anything he could to distract himself from the pretty girl wrapped around him.
He almost snorted at himself at the lengths he was going to, to make her comfortable. The images he was forcing into his brain. He didn't know if he would ever be able to look at Rick again. As his body relaxed and he got used to her being so close, he stopped reacting like a damn teenager that hadn’t ever got laid. He kissed the top of her head, squeezing her close a little and enjoying her. He heard her breathing even out and knew she had fallen asleep, smiling to himself as he held her.
“Sweet dreams pretty girl,” he whispered into her hair, closing his own eyes and drifting off to sleep. That night, Zoey slept right through, it was the first night in a long while she hadn't been tortured by nightmares, safe in Daryl's arms.
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