Crowns For Fools

The foolishness of fools is folly. Kind of like me in this picture: drunk on a roof. But hey, it's ok. I post on a lot of random things: God, books, science, history, literature, music, being awkward, and the struggle we call life.

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Places and things get old, but people will never stop surprising you.

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The things that make God so dear to us are not so much His great big blessings as the tiny things, because they show His amazing intimacy with us; He knows every detail of our individual lives.

Oswald Chambers

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This is definitely the most underrated song on the album.

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Person That I Wasn’t Expecting to See: Hi

Me: Hi.

Person: How are you?

Me, still caught off guard: Good. *walks away

Me to me: Dammit why do you have the social skills of an empty tube of toothpaste

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Awkward

It’s panic, lurking beneath the polite smiles and ingenuine giggles. An actual tabula rasa, the moment they ask you to say something. The building urge to interject because it just feels like it’s been too long since you said something. It builds, and builds and the pressure mounts inside your head until the only thing left to do is . . .leave. There is nothing to say. There never has been. Why am I here? What did you think you were trying to do?

But then how does one leave when you were nothing more than a shadow at the table in the first place? When, for the past hour, you haven’t said anything, so what can you possibly say now? Do you stand up and wave? Cheerily say goodbye and pretend you care about these people? And after standing, no one notices you stood up. No one. No one notices as you walk away. Then you make the fatal mistake of turning around and catching the eye of the one person. They’re going to talk, you know. About you, that awkward girl.

It’s indescribably awful. You only wish you couldn’t be what you are. How do you not be awkward? How does everyone else do it? Why doesn’t it come naturally? Shouldn’t it be natural? Wouldn’t it be great if you weren’t constantly aware of your body posture? If you weren’t wondering where you should put your hands? Wouldn’t it be great if the very presence of unfamiliar people didn’t unwillingly paralyze you? Yes, yes . . . it would be.