Beepbob no meu samba

Brazilian, daughter, big sister, publicist, journalist and now au pair that decided to leave everything behind for a fresh start in the U.S. This won't be a guide for the ones who want to be au pairs or babysitters; it's just a way I've found to leave thoughts and impressions of this sort of big adventure.

[danimlemos-blog]

Muita gente me pergunta de onde vem o nome do blog. Sou boa sujeita porque gosto de samba e escolhi o título de uma música de Jackson do Pandeiro, da década de 70, chamada Chiclete com Banana. A letra fala da mistura entre Brasil e Estados Unidos. Achei divertido brincar com isso também, apesar de não ter sido tão original como o mestre Jackson. Enjoy the song! 

[danimlemos-blog]

Hoje é dia!

Hoje é dia de escrever em português. É que a saudade tá tão grande que até pensar em inglês me deixa com certa raiva. Acordei ouvindo Luís Melodia e Seu Jorge. Comecei a trabalhar às 8h. Parei às 9h15 e coloquei Biquini Cavadão na ‘vitrola’ porque é cantando que eu vou espantando os males. Merda! Lembrei-me de um show deles que fui com uma grande amiga no ano passado.

Hoje é dia de achar que tá todo mundo estranho comigo, que todo mundo vem de grosseria pro meu lado. É dia em que me permito ficar sensível e ter certeza de que não sou de ferro; de ter certeza que sou manteiga derretida e que posso derramar quantas lágrimas forem necessárias para entrar no eixo novamente.

Hoje é dia de dúvida, de questionamento. Penso se largar meus dois empregos, carro e moradia valeram a pena pra vir atrás de um sonho que, ao contrário do que muita gente pensa, não tem nada a ver com um conto de fadas. Disso eu já sabia, mas se ao respirar as pessoas te julgam, imagina quando você pega um avião e vem morar em outro país.

Hoje é dia de me lembrar do meu irmão; de não conseguir controlar o choro quando a imagem dele atravessa a minha mente. Escuto a voz dele, a risada, o vejo andando, correndo e jogando vôlei - seu esporte favorito. Aí, bate uma saudade que dilacera o coração e transforma esse órgão que é de um tamanho de punho em uma azeitona mergulhada num Martini.

Hoje não é dia de ligar pra casa. Não dá pra ouvir minha mãe, meu pai, nem os latidos das cachorras. No máximo, uma mensagem via whatsapp pra dizer que estou bem, feliz e que está tudo uma correria por aqui e que não dá pra falar muito tempo.

Hoje é dia de escutar mais e falar menos. Apena escrever, que é para esvaziar as caraminholas que enchem a cabeça. Assim coloco no blog que é para os amigos entenderem que quando sumo do facebook ou de qualquer outra mídia, não significa que goste menos deles ou que os tenha esquecido. Simplesmente não dá para ver todo mundo e saber que não estou do lado deles para dividir a alegria ou a frustração de cada um.

Hoje é dia de levantar, sacudir a poeira e dar a volta por cima. É saber que toda essa miscelânea de sentimentos é de certa forma, boa, é oportuna. Clichê é dizer que “quando eu estou fraca é quando me sinto forte”, mas nos momentos de fraqueza que busco amadurecer, que consigo realmente refletir quais são os meus objetivos e o que posso fazer para alcançá-los; é quando tenho estímulo para sair da mesmice e da quietude. Acho que isso faz parte de um processo longo chamado maturidade.

[danimlemos-blog]

Rain, Thunder and Grey's Anatomy

Thunderstorm. I get scared even writing this word. Yeah, my dearest friends, this young lady over here just went through her very first thunderstorm of her life. To tell you the truth, the incident was somewhat funny. Not for me.  

I didn’t experience my best days in California last week. My host family traveled to Toronto for the Passover and I spent the holiday taking care of their 19-year-old cat. It was a brave old pet that passed away last Wednesday. Anyway, she wasn’t in her better shape when they came back, a day before. To top it off, it was Spring Break. As you know, I’m an au pair and my schedule was a little bit different during the past week. I had to be creative and entertain the toddler I take care of during mornings and afternoons. Thanks to Canada’s jetlag, the kid took very nice and long naps after lunch.

On Thursday evening, I was feeling tired and a little guilty about the cat – since I was the last person to be with her. So I had to skype my sort of guru, looking forward to listen to comforting and supportive words. I called Mom. The thing is, Mom and I were skyping and all of sudden, my room’s glass door and windows shook. Then, I started shaking. My first thought was: EARTHQUAKE. Luckily, I guess, it was just a thunder. I’m terrified about heavy rain, lightning and thunders since I was a little girl. I thought things were better now that I’m a grown up. Shame on me! Mom got worried, of course. I told her things were ‘ok’, it wasn’t raining so much and there were no more thunders. She didn’t buy it, for sure, and hung up.

When I finally calmed myself down, I decided to watch some TV, which has always made me some company. There I was, listening to Jennifer Lopez and Steven Tyler comments on American Idol when I read (and heard) an Alert System announcement. My English’s a lot better now than three months ago, when I arrive in California. I got so nervous that night, I could only understand the words: Thunderstorm, San Mateo County, Burlingame, tornado, 8:50pm. Sweet Mother of God! I took a look at the clock. It was 8:40pm. “I have 10 minutes to get myself ready for a Thunderstorm and a tornado”, I thought. I put some warmer clothes on, caught my computer, wallet, passport and visa and ‘shoved’ them in a bag and ran to the aim house, where my host family was. For the ones who don’t know, my room is a small cozy suite outside the house.

Rushed, scared, missing home and with the question ‘What the f*ck I’m doing here in this country?’ echoing inside my head. When I got there, my host mother was already sleeping. My host father was about to put the kid in bed. And I had to ask him if I could spend some time there, just hanging out, because I was afraid of thunders. He looked at me as if I were some kind of insane person and smiled. He was nice, as usual, and said ‘ok’, make yourself comfortable’.

I went straight to the living room, got a spot in the middle of the couch and turned the TV on. I don’t why, but just being with someone to share my agony, I was already feeling relaxed and ready to face what I had to. 8:50pm. “Great! Here comes the thunderstorm”. 9pm. New Grey’s Anatomy episode was about to start and I was thinking of a thunderstorm and a tornado that were supposedly coming. 9:10pm. My host father came out of the kid’s bedroom. The house was so quiet. 9:15pm. A few more not-scary-thunders. 9:20pm. Rain. 9:22pm.” Where’s the storm?” 9:24pm. “Where’s the storm again?” 9:25pm. Grey’s Anatomy’s break. 9:26pm. I got up from the couch, passed by the dining room, got to the kitchen, saw my host father and said “Thank you for letting me stay a while”; “No problem”, he replied. 9:28pm. I was back to my room, lay down on my bed and finished watching the episode. Relieved.

I’m sure my host father laughed behind my back and now makes fun of me with his friends at work. 

[danimlemos-blog]

I live in Burlingame, California.

In America for almost three months, I think it’s time to talk about Burlingame. Don’t you know where it is? It’s a charming little town located in the San Francisco Bay Area, just 20 minutes from the city. As a Brazilian, I’m madly in love with this place. It’s like I’m living in one of those American movies or shows placed in the suburbs. Houses without those big walls with electronic-against-burglars-fences, neighbors who say ‘Good morning’ to each other while they are walking with their dogs or jogging along the sidewalk.

I cannot tell about for the whole of Brazil, but I’ll take my old neighborhood as an example. Unfortunately I barely knew my neighbors. On a street with 50 houses – at least – I really knew and spoke with 20 people. Shame on me, I guess. Maybe my fault, maybe theirs. The fact is I used to cherish friends from work and college, and forgot to pay attention to the community. I am not unique. I think most of my neighbors would feel the same.

Safety

I used to live in the metropolitan region from Natal, northeastern Brazil, in a place called Nova Parnamirim, which is considered a very good district with all its parks, squares, grocery stores, malls, bakery shops, car shops, gas station, high quality schools and condos, fair taxes. It’s nice to raise your kids, rumor has it. It’s also quiet and safe there. Even so, my neighbors and my family pay a security guard to watch over our houses. As I just wrote, around 50 families were paying this guy about R$ 40 (almost US$ 20) each a month for an eight-hour-work every night. And somebody’s tried to break into my family’s house. Thank God we have a small poodle with its annoying barks! Well, we are all alive, even the dog.

Burlingame could not be more different. I know there is violence everywhere, but in three months I haven’t heard or seen any sign of houses that were burglarized. No big walls, no shocking fences, just ‘good morning’ or ‘have a nice day’ and ‘we are watching you’ signs. I could notice that most houses are not even locked during the day, kids playing in the front yard, shooting baskets on driveways, people acting as if life were nice and quiet, as if you just had to enjoy that peaceful moment. Perhaps this is the suburban lifestyle, but you know what? It’s just different from the reality I’ve come from. And I dangerously like it!

  Heavenly convenient

I’m definitely able to say that I’ve found some glamour in this au pair life – at least when I’m not working. Despite of taking care of kids almost ten hours a day and 45 hours a week, I can enjoy a hot cup of coffee at Starbucks, buy some make up at Sephora and get confused trying to make up my mind on which kind of food I’ll have for dinner or where I’m going to have brunch at during my days off. No hot-like-in-hell weather, no plans, no deadlines, no clients with giant egos.

I like thinking this au pair thing is a long term vacation. A vacation that I can learn another language, a vacation that I can actually live at another country, a vacation that I can truly experience another culture, a vacation that I’ve been paid for (not so much, but I really get money for it); the only difference is that in Burlingame, I don’t have work/college best friends, I don’t wake up with my poodle leaking my thumb, I don’t have a little brother to take to the movies every once in a while. And – worst of all – I don’t get the chance to watch novelas with my mom. God, I miss that!

Living abroad has its own pros and cons. It’s definitely being an amazing experience that I sincerely recommend to anybody. It’s the best way for you to know yourself, to be able to recognize your own boundaries and grow up in spirit. It’s like I’ve been blind my whole life and now I’m just able to see who I really am; as if I could be everything my family have asked me to be, leave here some of my roots, as if I were part of the globe, which I actually am, but I feel I can have something useful to be taught. 

[danimlemos-blog]

Danielle Muniz Lemos. Brazilian, daughter, sister, journalist, P.R., English teacher and au pair that decided to go back to class and become a student again. IN THE U.S.! I've created this tumblr account to post some of my thoughts and opinions about this crazy idea which has turned out to a great adventure that is living in a foreign country. 

I was born in Rio de Janeiro, one of the most famous places in Brazil. But the last ten years I lived Natal, a wonderful city in the brazilian northeast, which is well known by its beauty and heavenly beaches. Since January, I've been in charming city called Burlingame, in the San Francisco Bay Area, California. 

Hope you guys have fun reading this! Apologizing in advance for some spelling and grammar mistakes. A brazilian blogging in English. What a bummer! :) But I had to jump into this kind of challenge. I've been living in the U.S. for less than six  month and signed up for a writing for social media class. IN ENGLISH! Not only this tumblr's going to help me out in a bunch of ways, I also need this blog  to post my improvements as a student, which means homework. 

I bet I'm going to have fun doing it. Wish you, reader, have it too!