I know what my damage is.
While succumbing to the random click-click-click of web surfing tonight, I happened upon a tumblr link, which reminded me that many moons ago I had made myself a tumblr page, as my plucky domestically challenged alter-ego, The Anti-Stepford.
See, back a few years ago, I was blogging semi-sporadically about the trials and tribulations of being not quite right in the head, and the ins and outs of being a mother and wife, with a healthy dash of nerdiness in the form of everything from “As you wish...” to Zelda and her Legend. A gamer, comic fan, scifi and fantasy geek, I felt my eclectic taste and domestic foibles would be a perfect blog recipe. And shit, even trying to sum it up here, the premise has promise.
I even made myself a facebook page to help promote it, and had some decent momentum for awhile. I even contributed a few articles for the fabulous Adventures In Poor Taste! . Everything was coming up Millhouse.
BUT THE INEVITABLE HAPPENED
pictured above. my worst enemy.
I’ve long wondered what it is about me that seems to always be shoveling shit against the proverbial tide. I constantly feel “less than”... out of the loop, a day late and a dollar short... still the dorky girl in the too big glasses and highwaters.
Millions of people all over the globe blog and tweet and tumble about whatever the fuck they feel like. Occasionally these people have some real interesting things to say. Why can’t I be one of them?
And tonight, an epiphany.
My biggest problem is FOLLOW THROUGH.
I have a million great ideas! Art projects! Book ideas! Tattooing! A non-profit for victims of rape and sexual abuse!!!
But I shoot myself down before I’ve even taken flight. And the inspiration falls to the wayside, a victim of my depression and lack of discipline.
I’m going to try again. Because that’s all you can do, right? This tumblr was morphing into more than my comedic and nerdy reflections on life - I was being brutally honest about my childhood abuse and subsequent emotional wreckage before I left this page to wither into memory. Another good intention, nothing more.
I wish I could promise that I’m a changed woman, and vow to post regularly a new blog post of sparkling wit and charm. I can’t. I’d be lying. BUT I CAN promise that from the bottom of my heart I have every intention of reviving this endeavor, while also continuing to honestly address my depression.
My goal? To post no less than once a week. And since this is another follow through issue of mine: To do some damned Yoga (hopefully) every day. We’ll see how this goes. IMHO, I’m still domestically challenged, quirky, nerdy, and stray far from the norm. And good, bad or indifferent, entertaining as fuck.
SO with your permission, internets,
THE ANTI-STEPFORD HATH RETURNED!
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