falling through reality @etherevelie - Tumblr Blog

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<hi welcome to my circus of dreams side blog

call me grace

come and stay a while

sniff the poppies

fall asleep

or don’t I don’t really care>

< text posts tagged !memories!>

umM

Ok bye

#tcod #memories #circus of dreams #the circus of dreams

deathofnarcissus

gary

#aw #gar ee #tcod #re blog!

Bottom of the ocean .

New Circus of Dreams art just dropped !

#fantasies #myart #tcod #the circus of dreams #camellia tcod #vincent tcod #aphro tcod

deathofnarcissus

(shaking) (crying) (exploding) (coughing up blood) (sniffling) (dissolving) (unraveling) (ceasing to exist) how is everyone

#re blog !#AHHHHHHDHHDBDGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHMMMM

deathofnarcissus

you know i think what i find the most truly haunting about the second vincent's whole story arc is the fact that he is so separated from his obviously more beloved counterpart and it shows so clearly even if he was never that aware of it.

nearly everyone around him had met clyde and treated him accordingly: assuming things that he wasn't a part of, becoming puzzled as to why he was acting differently, etc. i feel like there was a distinct sense of alienation that showed each time an interaction like this happened, and his confusion and often frustration felt palpable as people kept alluding to this person who wasn't him, and it only grew increasingly uncomfortable to be judged based on people's perceptions of not-him. this is especially so considering how much he clearly believed in presenting himself so intricately and how that slowly started to unravel as it was rendered useless by anyone who claims to have met him before.

and don't get me started on the underlying notion that of his usefulness; there was always a sense that he was going to die, even if he never had a full enough view of the situation to put the pieces together. as soon as he stepped onto the page, it was instantly clear that he wasn't sticking around for very long, both due to his self-concerned tendencies and attitude and his place in the story. the reader would have already been aware of the extremely specific problem clyde was facing, and it would only be a matter of time until this perfect vessel could be put to use. his entrance following the whole deal that clyde needed a body was a slap in the face; who could be better to inhabit than a perfect copy of your previous self? he was introduced as a character you were meant to recognize as tragic, which made his journey all the more effective knowing his fate and dreading what would eventually, inevitably come to pass. he was introduced specifically to die, and you have to just hold your breath for every second waiting for it to happen.

and all of this makes me look back upon how it ended, which makes me utterly sick to my stomach every time i think about it. he was so ignorant of everything that was going on around him, making him such a vulnerable target among pre-established characters who had a sense of what goes on in the circus. he fell into every trap he could, going in blind and arrogant and untouched by dangers he was completely separated from in the real world. maybe he was lucky, managing to find company with nene/aphro and mell, who could at least steer him on the right path, but he was truly blind to whatever could have happened until it was too late to be taken back.

and what really gets me is the fact that he ended up so truly alone. by the time he'd stumbled out of the maze and into the jaws of the beast once more, he was both physically and socially completely alienated from everything around him. the people searching for him didn't even particularly like him, and one of them specifically knew the connotations of his presence in reference to clyde- who knows what would've happened if they were present during the last bit! he'd lost his primary means of communication and a distinct part of his identity, something that must have been so dehumanizing on his end along with the fact that he couldn't even express his grief in a properly cathartic way. the fact that he was physically by himself in the theater hall just hammers in how alone he was. his breakdown was suffocating, having to manage how overwhelming it all was and be effectively unrecognized through it all, so insignificant to the passive observer because of his lack of sound and to anyone aware of his situation because they already had the sense that he was doomed. nothing worked in his favor, and nothing could have because of the sheer separation from humanity he was faced with as soon as he stepped foot through the gates. and his grief was so palpable because of that, only exponentially worse because he didn't know what was going on. he might've realized a little too late what was so dangerous about the circus, but he never got to know how condemned he was in the first place.

and in the end, i think clyde knew that. i think he understood- if only through catching a glimpse of the end result, sharing his sorrow and passion and hopelessness -how isolated he must have felt, even if he was always meant to kill him in the end.

#re blog!#apologize with tEars

Sometimes I think about the fact that so many people in the circus are Chill dren. Or at least definitely not grown . Like Vincent, for all of his faults, is a 17 year old with severe trauma caused by his. Childhood and he got killed and he was scared . I say that in reference to the second Vincent but it honestly applies to both. Desperation is a powerful thing. He is a kid and he wants to be safe and he wants to be loved. Despite the morality of his actions being. You know. The way it is I can understand. I can empathize. This dreamworld is strange and frightening and it twists people into what they never thought they would be.

Circe was the yOungest guest iirc and she literally had her companion murdered and eaten in front of her. If not for Damiel finding her she . Probably would’ve died . (Which is a bit humorous because in interviews it’s said that she was planned to die. Hm) I think she’s the only character who’s gotten a happy, or perhaps more bittersweet ending, considering the means by which she escaped the circus . I am happy the baby didn’t die, though.

The fact that there’s a whole group of teens trapped in the circus who all relate to each other in this fucked uo sort of way who have been morphed into different people than those who walked in gets me insane. I could talk about those fuckers for. EVER.

#memories #tcod #the circus of dreams #tcod spoilers

: [

hi my name is vincent amadeus antoine and i have short wavy blond hair and i'm french (that's how i got my name) and gorgeous blue eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me i look like Dorian Gray (AN: if you don't know who it is get the hell out of here!). i'm not related to Narcissus but i wish i was because he's a major fucking hottie. i'm human (i have an interdimensional doppelgänger though) and my teeth are straight and white. i'm also a violinist, and i go to a prestigious private school in Paris where i'm in my seventh year (i'm seventeen). i'm a prep (in case you couldn't tell) and i wear mostly gold jewelry. i love Yves Saint Laurent and i buy all my clothes from there. for example today i was wearing a white silk shirt with the top two buttons unbuttoned, form-fitting designer pants and heeled dress shoes. i was wearing a stainless steel queen bee brooch with a crown engraved on the back and a red gemstone on the front, one gold teardrop-shaped earring on my left ear (i'm heterosexual lol), and some gold rings on both of my hands. i was walking around the Circus of Dreams (Nightmares) after getting out of the "Maze of Ether", which i was very happy about. a guy infested with maggots stared at me. i put my middle finger up at him.

#re blog !#the NOISE I LET OU 5t.

leafsea

senseless // 5.29.2023

#re blog !#aesthetic

elektrakute

a lovely distraction (art by @cybervoidgirl on Twitter)

#re blog!#aesthetic

etherevelie

etherevelie

To all of you in. My tags. The circus by nature sucks people into the void. They have not been left behind . That egg baby is coming back. My r4 prediction. I am an oracle.

#memories #tcod

deathofnarcissus

i'm going insane again does anyone want anything

#help.him #re blog !

It is real guys. I promise

No but. Next rotation. My rotation 4/5 predictions. I called it here first.

#bi-gender vincent truther #that is me #memories #vincent Antoine #vincent Amadeus Antoine #Vincent tcod #tcod

wwelcome to the first paRt of my

<too-day we are looking at the FIRST fortune… given to. Camellia. Their FIRST.>

The Three Of Wands:

“your past was without opportunity, it certainly did not prepare you for where you are now."

Mell grew up with good people , but they had to face the hardships that prevented them from reaching their full. Potential. Mostly physically, but parental loss too is not easily overcome. These did not give them the opportunity to be prepared for things such as these. I do not blame them.

The Empress:

“You have the opportunity to do something new. Something enlightening.”

Ah. The hope of the early circus. The hope of first arc MELL. What i only yearn fore now. This could be in reference to the opportunity to step out of their shell- which they did, a bit, in the tightrope walker’s trial . In general, a lot of what has happened even now in regards to. Old gods. Is still enlightening. Maybe it will help later. This could also be referencing their relationship with Vincent. (The first one OBVIOUSLY.)

Nine of Wands:

“But there is something you are scared of, whatever could that be.”

This could, on a surface level, be in reference to Mell’s general anxieties that they grapple with throughout the . SEries. Although, I think the thing fate says next proves tellIng:

“Your fear will hold you back.”

This could be in reference to a lot, and it could even be something that got rebuked. As fate says, the cards are fickle. But what comes to mind is Mell’s inability to act. In some scenarios. Like with Dolan, although I would thiNk that it was for. The best that they didn’t. But they have the tendency to freeze. Like a Deer in the Headlights. Ironic.

Okseeyou

#memories #camellia coolatta #mell tcod #the circus of dreams #tcod #camellia tcod #tarot analysis #etherevelie