restoring a feisty belle

A blog about a 42/f submissive who has been through hell and back, is fluent in sarcasm, and is becoming the strong woman she is meant to be. I blog about what I have experienced, feel, want, and think is funny. This blog is 18+.

[feistyredhead79]

Just on here to update

12-18-2021

Mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s (middle stage), dad is needing to have three (possibly four) surgeries for various issues, work is stressful, I’m still sober, still don’t sleep well, and I miss laughing.

[feistyredhead79]

12-05-2020

Becoming quiet not only to be introspective, but to do an extrospection of my surroundings (including people). My world, like most of yours, is heavy right now and I am numb, I can’t think to solve any of my worries right now. I’m just being and helping take care of my mother and that’s ok.

[feistyredhead79]

FYI: Incest is not a kink.

You can lump that vile mess in with pedophilia and beastiality.

[feistyredhead79]

I feel out of place. I don’t fit in anywhere; I never have. I’ve always been the odd one out my whole life in a group. I know who I am and I’m not changing for anyone. I guess I just feel disconnected in a way. I’m sure there are a lot of us that feels this way.

[feistyredhead79]

The spirit realm is not to be dabbled in or played with.

[feistyredhead79]

[feistyredhead79]

He has never lied to me, and yet because of men I don’t believe even when He says I’m beautiful. I don’t believe men’s compliments on my physical appearance. My heart is beautiful, this I know. I’m compassionate, empathetic, and giving. Maybe that’s why I get hurt all the time. I needed to hear this song today to lift my spirit up.

[feistyredhead79]

She is lost and confused, so she just sits a waits until things make sense.

[feistyredhead79]

It’s amazing that a dog can sense you’re about to break down before you actually do.

[feistyredhead79]

Don’t let people get into your head and play with your heart.

[feistyredhead79]

What do you see?

I’ve shown this picture to many people and not one has seen the same things I see.

[feistyredhead79]

True Love

I’ve never been in love, but I know what true love is. I’ve seen it in the lost eyes of a man who just lost his wife. I’ve seen it in the way my parents treat and look at each other. I’ve seen it in the way my brother takes care of his wife. Just because I’ve never experienced something, doesn’t mean I don’t understand it.

[feistyredhead79]

There are no stones, around me on the ground I stand, for me to pick up and hurl at you in judgement. So don't judge me because I sin differently than you do. I never said I was perfect, nor are you.

I need this on a t-shirt.

[feistyredhead79]

I’m tired

I’m tired of thinking. I’m tired of making decisions. I just want to sit on the beach, not think, and watch the ocean waves.

[feistyredhead79]

I am an empath

We see the world with our hearts and feel everyone’s emotions around us.

We sense the brokenness inside of you and we feel your sadness.

We can’t help but want to take the sadness away.

We sense the love you have overflowing from you and we feel your joy.

We are energized by you.

We sense the hate and bitterness that is seeping from you and it gives us a very unsettling feeling.

We want to know what is the root cause of your hate, so we can help you change the hate to love and the bitterness to joy.

Our hearts are vulnerable and we easily become attached, thus leaving us wide open for heartache.

All of this is very draining, because we take on your emotions along with having our own.

With all that said, narcissist (self centered assholes) are drawn to empaths, and I’ve had my fill of relationships with them. Narcissist can suck a pickled limp dick. That’s not a very empathetic thing to say, but I don’t care for people who use others and only think of themselves.