Balthazar wished - often - that he could rewind the clock - even just to revisit the times that he had spent with his brother before his feelings developed - back when they were best friends and their family, although a little unorderly, stuck together, as a unit, as a force not to be reckoned with. And back to simple times when he and Gabriel had shared a drink without the fear in the back of Balthazarâs mind that he would do unspeakable things to his brother if he got too drunk. The simple times had been so much easier - and so much better, and he hoped, maybe - that this was a second chance - to maybe - start again. But he doubted it, his feelings were too strong, and he was afraid that they would take control of him - and ruin his second chance at happiness.
The logical part of Balthazarâs mind told him that if Gabriel ever found out about his âthoughtsâ things would not be as smooth as he wanted things to go. But seeing his brother again, seeing him after this long, after all the time he had thought the feelings had left him, he had found that feelings this strong were hard to get rid of, even if they were for your own brother, and thatâs what made him feel a little sick - because he knew that - and yet, he still couldnât do it - he still couldnât put those thoughts aside. He needed to put Gabriel first, needed to keep him in the dark about the things that flew through his mind at night, things that he would love to do - to his older brother, things he wished were real, shudders rippling down his spine, fingers and lips exploring each otherâs naked, sweaty bodies, arousals hard and seeping against each otherâs.
He shook the thought out of his head. It would never happen! Ever!
Oh how Balthazar wished he had moved down ever so slightly, planted his lips on the others, showing him what he truly felt, what he had wanted for so long now - but he hadnât, and he never would - because the risk of loosing Gabriel was far more important than his stupid feelings. And Gabriel was far more important than him - he always had been, always would be.
But the words that had stumbled out of his mouth spun around his head, worry filling him - had he said a little too much? Had the kiss to the temple been too close, was it too intimate for brothers to share?
As Gabriel had broken away, the surge of worry had built up - his mind going busy, thinking of reasons why Gabriel should stay - and only thinking of one that may keep him there, may keep him with the other. The fear that his brother was about to start sprinting out of the door, he hated himself for it - because he knew that Gabriel had his reasons for leaving - although he didnât know quite what they were, he knew he had them.
He nodded slightly, swallowing hard, trying to relax his mind. âI hope so Gabe.â He let a small smile tug at the corner of his mouth. His eyes ran over his brotherâs features, remebering every last detail, especially those amazing, almost Golden eyes. âSo 8?â he said, trying to remind himself that they were about to go on a hunt in the morning.
vaporwave
2087
stormborns
s-u-f-j-a-n-s-t-e-v-e-n-s
germansingergirl
romaincrisis
