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tumblr really marked me as an NSFW blog. really. REALLY. -_-

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[modedamour]

Larry Hofmann

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Peach Crisp

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@WeHeartIt/entry/274379502/via/mylittlereign

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[gifsandquotes]

Twenty-six. Thoughts.

The past six to twelve months have been filled with all sorts of emotional turbulence. There were so many days where I felt as if I was drowning, in self-convictions of how I can’t do X, Y, or Z, so why try? I’m useless. And then there were days where I would muster courage from conversations with my best friends, mid-coffee date. I let these small moments--whether good or bad--dictate my decision. So, I’ve come to realize how easily I allow myself to be engulfed by my feelings. Why do I continue to allow these moments of extreme doubt or courage dictate what happens next? I need to make decisions for myself, and not allow my feelings to make things happen. This is what I need to work on; un.

I have been told that I seldomly take credit for my work done, particularly in the realm of academia. I genuinely don’t really know when the work is my own doing, and when it is sheer luck. The lack of academic ownership propelled this feeling of inadequacy and incapability for the longest time. I feel differently now--I suppose... If I could be honest with you guys: I found validation in my academic abilities through an acceptance letter, rather than believing in myself. I recognize that I still want to work on believe in myself without needing anything or anyone else. This is what I need to work on; deux.

Here is the hardest one to talk about: my inability to act and be in congruence with what I preach or want to be. I think that’s self-explanatory... but in short, I’m still working on myself. I’m trying to become the best version of myself... and sometimes, it’s discouraging to realize and accept that the way I’ve acted in some situations and/or to some people have fallen short of this vision that I have for who I hope to become. But hell, I’ll keep trying. This is what I need to work on; trois.

[azuher-deactivated20180104]

[amortizing]

Sometimes you need to know your place in someone’s life because you might get hurt if you expect too much.

Hannah Lina (via amortizing)