Quoties

Feel free to message me about anything. I'll write back as soon as possible. *Trigger Warning*

[gingercide]

I’m no longer in the mood to live...

No one is happy with me, I don’t bring any happiness to any situation...

I’m not a good person so why should I be here to get in peoples way of living life and finding their soulmate. It doesn’t matter how much I love someone I’m always not good enough. And each time I fail to do my job and bring happiness.

Everything I do hurts someone or makes them cry so clearly I’m incapable of doing anymore good. When I want something it’s always wrong but I am expected to abide with whatever other people want.

But I’m too coward to end my pain so I pray that a run away vehicle would do me the honors or that a stray shot directs its attention towards me.or just let me choke on some food that Ill eventually eat

But before I go please just let me see all the good I did actually do so that I’ll leave this place with some knowledge of good deeds or happy experiences.

This post will not be concluded with my signature three dots because this is the last one.

[gingercide]

No... I can’t, not again...

[gingercide]

You will grow tired of me

I feel like it’s already happened...

[gingercide]

I feel like a failed experiment...

[gingercide]

Is there a way to kill myself without hurting anyone else...

[tootiredofbeing]

[gingercide]

2:04 AM

I’m not gonna bother you at this time of night because the sound of your breathing is the only thing keeping me sane. It’s not you, it’s everything else going on that’s always bothering me. Whether it’s me quitting school and have parents that like to throw it back in my face and constantly think about how big of a mistake it was. Or is it the fact that my family hates me and lies to my face and likes to pretend I’m the one who destroys everything. But I mean, I can’t blame them, I do mess everything up. It takes every fiber of my being to not go back to the bad book and fill my head with dangerous thoughts...

This is just something that I refuse to fuck up. I know I’m not doing the best job, but I’m really trying to give you everything that you ask for. So I’m sorry that I cry or get scared about dumb stuff. I just worry that I’ve fucked up for the last time and will be hurt again...

So 2:04 AM is my sad time right now. It’s my time to get depressed, cry, and hate myself a little more than the previous day...

[gingercide]

Squeeze

I squeeze my fingers and toes together so hard that it feels like I break their tips.

All just because I’m sad and I can’t scream to release stress or anger or I don’t know what. Frustration is what I’m thinking of. I’m squeezing because I’m tired of scratching and tearing the skin at my chest trying to get to my bleeding heart.

[gingercide]

Astro

I’m a black hole, I keep storing all these things inside of me till I can’t take it anymore...

Then I collapse and implode in on myself...

[gingercide]

All my comfort slips away with you ...

[gingercide]

Don’t read...

The only place I can go to sort out my thoughts peacefully...

I’m just a scared boy in a big scary world. I’m afraid of failing and being a disappointment to everyone that’s close. So far that just happens to be the outcome of everything I do. I’m left with no friends to care about me, no family that I can talk to so what’s the point of trying to go on in this world with no one here that loves or supports me. Family might say they love me but do they really show it though?

I’m left by myself in this lonely bed wandering the depths of my mind trying to pull something out that gives me hope that I’m worth just a shred of something to someone. My heart is racing and my mind is keeping up in their race that never seems to be over.

By now if your here then you didn’t listen to the title so congrats on knowing how I feel with my life. My poor, pitiful, miserable life...

This isn’t something I’m writing to be relatable, this is good ole vintage sadness straight from the source.

There really isn’t a night that goes by that I don’t think about her. She is beautiful, just absolutely besutiful. If only she could see herself the way I do... wow

I know that I want to be with her but I don’t know if she wants the same. She says she does but then there are nights that I fuck up and lose my words and sit there like a fool. I know it hurts her and that hurts me...

I’m scared that I may never know what it’s like to fufill my dreams and help her fulfill hers.

I’m starting to accept that living just isn’t for me. It’s not your fault if your reading this. I can’t take much more of the pain. It’s starting to hurt to much.

I stay up in the night thinking “Maybe this is it. Maybe this is where the pain ends.” Each morning I’m surprised to see that I woke up on time.

But don’t worry just like other nights I’m too much of a coward to end the pain and suffering...

[gingercide]

“Be careful who you trust, the devil was once an angel.”

—

Unknown

The person I called my best friend betrayed me when I needed him most…

[gingercide]

It haunts me to this day...

[poetsbloom]

Push you away

I push you away

I panic

And I push you away.

My heads on fire.

I scream and claw away

At my burning skin.

I’m crying.

But the tears only evaporate

Off my boiling face.

Every muscle in my body

Argues in pain

As every part of me

Burns

Burns

Burns.

The tears hurt

My legs are on fire

My hands burn

With regret

And suddenly I’m cold.

I’ve done enough damage

And my mind is suddenly numb

And still.

I’ve stopped crying

Because I have nothing left to feel.

It’s 2am and I’m shattered

Pushing every emotion away

Is killing my soul

I’m tired of living

And fighting this never ending battle.

I’m tired of supposed help

That’s doing fuck all.

I’m sorry I push you away

When everything goes to shit

I just don’t want you to care

I don’t want you to worry

I don’t want you to get dragged down too

If you can’t help why I’m broken

Why do you need to know.

I’ll ignore you

But that makes me a shit person

Little do you know

All I’m trying to do

Is protect you

From the monster in my head.

[yourlocalmadlad]

why cant i just be enough

[fucktardbitch]

I wish u could commit suicide with no pain and 100% accuracy of success. Cause bitch I would be dead years ago.

[fucktardbitch]

I’m gross

[gingercide]