The Liveblog from Hell

In which one long-time Zelda fan attempts her first playthrough of Master Quest. Copious amounts of profanity will follow. This blog is not for the faint of heart, but perhaps is for the easily amused and those who enjoy schadenfreude. You can start at the beginning of the quest by clicking here.

[goddammitmasterquest]

Ahaha, this is great! Poor Link though... he went from forest kid to "guy the Sages need to crawl through liquid dead people"

[goddammitmasterquest]

aright, I think that's enough for one day

[goddammitmasterquest]

yo where did all these ice platforms in the last room come from

[goddammitmasterquest]

I'm pretty sure this room used to have a huge cauldron or something in it?

Time to start hitting shit.

[goddammitmasterquest]

Or not

[goddammitmasterquest]

Three hits with Biggoron Sword and taking all manner of piss from them, or taking much longer with the  Master Sword and being able to protect myself?

Well, given the first method killed me after one Stalfos, I might switch over to the second.

[goddammitmasterquest]

STALFOS

[goddammitmasterquest]

I am an absolute idiot

[goddammitmasterquest]

there has got to be a timeblock or something I'm not getting because I can't get hte last fuckign rupee

[goddammitmasterquest]

Gathering up silver rupees with the help of hookshot targets visible and invisible!

[goddammitmasterquest]

One more reason to love the biggoron sword: Redead+jump attack=instakill 

[goddammitmasterquest]

And it even comes with its own redeads!

[goddammitmasterquest]

Oh what a lovely empty room

>puts on Lens of Truth

Look at those beautiful invisible pointy iron spikes of death

[goddammitmasterquest]

Fuck everything that just happened.

This is why Farore's Wind is a thing. Now I will never have to do that thing again.

[goddammitmasterquest]

FUCKING FINALLY

I guess this is why the game told me to "trust in the boots."

[goddammitmasterquest]

Clearly the dev team anticipated people fucking up this part a lot because there's a health-and-magic restoring fairy right in the middle of this farce.

[goddammitmasterquest]

and this time I missed that tiny fucking ledge I have to jump onto