Ahead of the Curve

AlexaRae|21|New York

[landreform]

r/zerocarb is my new favorite subreddit

[tamascotchi-deactivated20190101]

new trend: scurvy

[harlekins]

“I don’t mean to bring up the vitamin c discussion again...” omfgg

[galaxygala-blog]

[lvloonlight]

[dollysgothworld]

[fuocogo]

Did everyone just…. forget how to create, all of a sudden? Disney pumping out the fourth remake in a row? Movies are like 70% sequels? Stories in games being just bad if they exist at all? Haven’t had a book get hyped in like half a decade? Are we okay? What’s going on?

[showerthoughtsofficial]

April 15th is a accursed day in human history. Lincoln’s death (1865), Sinking of Titanic (1912), Boston Bombing (2013), and now Notre Dame Fire (2019).

[comics-universe-archive]

I’m supposed to say “knock, knock” first.

[dewgongo]

*crowd surfs at ur funeral*

[theothersideofthechair]

Man: Hi can I get a haircut?

Me: You can but you’re going to have to wait for half an hour.

Man: Oh no its okay I’ll just take whoever’s available.

Me: No one is available right now. It’s going to be a half hour wait.

Man: Oh its okay just give me whoever can take me right now.

Me: There. Is. No. One. Available. To. Give. You. A. Hair. Cut. Right. Now.

Man: what do you mean?

Me rapidly losing patience: I have a colour and my coworker has a Perm. We are both busy and there is no one else in the salon. So if you’d like to take a seat we can fit you in in 30 minutes.

Man: Oh….. Well I don’t want to wait.

Me: Then I suggest you make an appointment and come back and you won’t have to wait.

Man: So there’s no one available right now?

Me:

[defydamage]

This is so much fucking funnier with the gif removed

[wlw]

u ever talk to those men that make u feel like u involuntarily logged into 4chan

[n-ktnk]

[anxietyproblem]

[sugarvenomxbitchh]

😂😂😂

[cringeferatu]

every day i eat bread and think about women to stay alive, this is known as maintaining homostasis

[podencos]

[xueyangapologist]

i’m so bad at remembering the average age for baby milestones like someone will be like “she’s 18 months (:” and i’ll be like “right what can she…… do? teeth? are there teeth?”

[westarri]

“stats?”

[goruma]

ive tried opening my mouth and saying words before nd ive gotta say. im not a fan

[certan]

Don’t drink and drive your dog won’t understand why you never came home