blissful melancholia

lucky girl.. strong woman...least likely to succeed; only one to survive.

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My side blog I never use. Maybe I should start?

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Come one, come all, to this fabulous place called job purgatory! Where patience is wearing thin, and the seams are ready to burst!

Ducks in a row, now I gotta find out if they will fly!

Waiting sucks, bites, blows, when I just wanna know!

Me = Job, or No!

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Hope and patience.

Love and forgiveness.

These words whisper in my ear

They are not a whim

It's okay to listen in

Spoken the truth between the fears

Hearts are broken

When lives are built

To grow a flower

Or waking in the day

It all gives way

Something climbing up

Falling down

The vines become fortified

Tears raining down

Change doesn't make a sound

It's how kingdoms grow

And how sorrows

Become freedom

Love and patience

Hope and forgiveness

Paving the cobblestones

As we walk along

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(Currently) Dark VS Light

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To be.

Or not?

Some ask this, some would rather not

Worn out tired

Remember where you began

Remember, taking time

Giving time

Freely

I wouldn't take back anything lost

Because obviously I didn't need it

Maybe I already gained..

To be

Just be

Is not a question..

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It's my 17 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳

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My LJ is 23!

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Went to check my work email and it was deactivated.

I was fired. Just like that. I don't want to tell anyone, because it's too embarrassing and I don't want people to worry about me. And this is my only private space online.

I just can't disappoint the people in my life. And if I say it out loud it'll be real and I am not ready for the sadness that will pour out.

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I miss the cute little happy Dustin!

But alas is life and being a teenager grieving his friend.

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Happy Halloween!

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Insomnia is a lovely side effect of a very weird work schedule.

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Got a call from Haavad (Harvard) medical school and the guy reminded me of Good Will Hunting!

100% Baaaaston. Love it!

Gotta go play caaahds and drive in my cahhr!

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When calling for a service, whatever that may be, you might hear the dulcet tones of, "Thank you for calling, this is Heather how may I help you today?"

And I definitely will!

New job baby!!

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Randomly taken. It reminds of something on an emo album. Lol

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I've seriously been physically out of shape and I am super disappointed in myself. Eating and not eating kinda go on and off. Really not interested in food and hungry at the same time.

I have no idea what the hell is going on. Can't find a job, I've been in Florida 3 years and still unable to get acclimated. After my birthday it's all becoming scary and I feel out of control. Feels very hopeless and I can't give up, but it's very tempting and it's a struggle to stay positive.

And I'm tired and all I want to do is sleep.

I'm too old to be so directionless and lost.

And not eating much and having a headache and feeling faint and it feels oddly good, because I need control of something, anything.

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Tagged by @fght-ff-yr-dmns to post 6 non selfie photos!