- @hot-topikz - Tumblr Blog

it hurts because i thought i finally had a best friend who also saw me as their best friend. it hurts thinking of the memories they're going to make. it hurts thinking of the memories i could've made. it hurts because i haven't gone on vacation in years and probably won't be able to for a long time. it hurts that i can't even tell them i'm upset over it. maybe people were right about 3 person friendships.

bpd moment when i start almost crying and cussing at my bf bc of something from two and a half years ago

me when i can't go a day without being intoxicated

today i had soup, vodka, and a white monster. that is the kind of day i am having

i have no clue what to do anymore

self medicating lol

it would be so nice if he'd just ask if i'm ok. how i'm doing. how my day is.

i feel the most alone i've ever felt right now i don't know what to do

most people will never understand it. getting your hands on a blade. dragging it across your skin with a shaky hand. cleaning up the blood with an old t shirt you don't wear anymore. thinking of cutting as soon as something goes wrong. being scared you cut too deep. seeing the white before it turns red. being unable to stop.

i'm so bad at standing up for myself and she probably thinks i'm just being a baby

for the first time i really don't have anyone to go to and i'm not handling it well

me planning to finally vent but he's finally in a good mood so i don't want to ruin it so instead i'm gonna get as high as i can and cut

me swearing that i don't care what people think of me and then being teased once and deleting my entire account

feeling like i have absolutely no one rn 👍

in what fucking world is it okay to literally bully someone

i think i'm going to kill myself. like actually this time. i'm so so tired. i can't do this anymore

mixed feelings asf

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