What doesn't kill us makes us who we are. @imheretorescuey0u - Tumblr Blog

4-7 months

0-3 months

Emery Lee pt 3

So I get in the tub. They set me up with a Bluetooth speaker, a fan, candles, a tub of wash cloths in ice water, and dim lights. Wes was taking selfies of course. I stayed in that position the whole time. And this is where it gets weirdly wonderful. The next 45 minutes felt like 5. I hit the zone and I still cannot believe how well I managed the pain. Remember, I was 4.5/5 and at a -2 station 20 minutes before I got in the tub. I remember the contractions getting more intense and I was low moaning through them. Wes kept the cold wash clothes on me and would say the best things. "Relax and rest your shoulders when you can." "You're so good at this" "that's right deep low breathes through the pain". Then the pressure started and in my labor haze, I was like "oh she must be moving out of my pelvis". The contractions started to space out while getting longer and intense. I was shaking trough them and slumping down to rest in between. Then finally I "broke" and said "THE PRESSURE SUCKS I WANT HER OUT OF ME" And then a voice I didn't know said "well good because with the next contraction her head will be out" the midwife came in some point and I was so in the zone that I didn't even notice. But I was so confused like what did she just say?! The baby's head?!" I absolutely did not realize the pressure was my body pushing. After Wes told me he also did not realize how deep into labor we were. And she was right. One more contraction and her head was out. The next contraction, she was born. She was just in the water and I was like uh should someone grab her?! And the midwife was like "haha yeah, you can" like I was a dummy. So I scooped her right up. The first person to ever touch her.

6lb 4oz 19.5inches

Born at like 9:51?

18 months later and I open tumblr and this post was still up. So here, have the end of my birth story. Emmy is magical.

The E4 story part 2

So 8:15 comes around and finally a midwife comes in and checks me. I was like 4-5cm and she asked to do a membrane stretch to get things going. I agreed and I could let feel her go around the baby's head. It was WEIRD. She told me they would go check to see if a room with a tub was open so I could be admitted.

This is when the whole experience turned in the best possible way. She came back and said that the birth center was just reopened and I could be moved over. She did say that if I did not continue to progress that they may send me back out to wait and I just looked at her and said "I don't think that will be an issue".

They gave me the option to either walk over or to ride the wheel chair over. I chose to walk, because again, I do not like to sit in labor at all. August was my nurse and she is a true angel from above. She and the on call doula (which is so cool?!) walked us over and I was contracting every 2 minutes or so. I got a contraction while walking across the street and was like OH NO NOT THE TIME (at this point I was stopping through them and either leaning on Wes or having him do hip squeezes) and I waddled so fast across the street. My contractions were manageable but definitely quick and intense.

Then we got to our room. Which was insanely nice. The doula started the tub immediately for me and August was busy setting up candles, getting a Bluetooth speaker, a fan, and cold wash cloths.

Wes took the picture of me standing up mid contraction but you know I had to pop up and look cute. Then I took my true last bump picture.

Then I took off all of my clothes as quick as I could and got into the tub before it was even close to being full. I just wanted to be in the water. It was like an instinctive pull. I NEEDED to be in there.

Also want to note the headphones and how amazing my playlist was. Truly an incredible coping tool.

Part 1 of the E4 story.

So Wednesday around 6pm I started getting a lil crampy. Not painful cramps but enough to be like hmmmm there's a timetable pattern here. Wes had a math exam and a lil men's group church thing and I was it's chill. Go. He got a 97% on the exam too.

They stayed consistent but I was able to sleep for a few hours. I woke back up around 3 and had some super small amounts of bloody show so I let Wes know and we just chilled for a bit. My sister in law came over around 5am-ish and we headed in. It's a 40 minute drive to the birth center and typically the car ride to the hospital is one of the worst parts. I hate sitting through contractions. But I managed super well and I was like crap what if we came too soon?

We had to call the birth center to give the on call midwife a heads up. They told us the birth center was shut down due to a plumbing issue and I needed to go to the traditional L&D. I was not happy. Then they put us in a public triage room and there were 3 of us in there separated by curtains. One lady was SCREAMING and cussing at the nurses (zero judgement but also absolutely not what I personally wanted to labor with) and another snoring.

Any way, they check me at 7am and I was only 3cm and they wanted me to leave and I was like.......ehhhhh I don't know. I do not think that's a good idea right now. I was discouraged, mentally preparing for a different labor experience, and ANNOYED. My contractions felt bigger than 3cm. So they said okay stay and we will give you an hour. I threw on my head phones (I made the best playlist of my entire life) and just stood and swayed through it. It was very manageable at this point but I was having a lot of back pain so Wes was helping with some hip squeezes.

I'm so thankful for my weird love of labor and delivery because I've never dealt with back labor before. I would not have known about hip squeezes other wise. It helped SO MUCH.

Just a final bump update because IM NOT PREGNANT ANY MORE BUDDIES.

I can't even wait to share my story.

39+4 why.

I'm mentally fried. That's the update. Everyone is annoying. I'm grouchy.

But I did just leave my appointment and she is head down but not incredibly low. I'm open to a check and sweep at my next appointment but I am BEGGING her to be born before then. She did say they will break my water to try and induce around 41 weeks and still let me birth at the birth center since it's not my first. She even said they can break it in triage and then send me home to labor if needed. So that's nice.

I'm so tired though. Like we are going to get lunch and then I hope I can go home and nap for a bit.

Final date night before this baby is born.

I had contracts last night then they randomly stopped at like 3am. I have labor blue balls.

Today we rested and then Walmart-ed then dropped the girls off so we could go eat all you can eat Korean bbq. Then we walked Ross and then a lil local trail. Then we got sundaes.

Now the girls are having a sister sleep over and I'm bouncing away. I don't think she will be here just yet but I wish she would. I just don't want to work any more and the idea of clocking in at work is nasty.

39 whole weeks dude.

Update from my appointment.

She's head down and lowering. The midwife said she hopes to see me this weekend too. Which I wanna believe will happen.

imheretorescuey0u

38+5 and the most pregnant I’ve ever been. For the last time. We went on a four mile walk, had Indian food, and now I’m dancing/twerking/bouncing on my yoga ball all in hopes of having a baby soon. I’m trying to really embrace these final days of my final pregnancy but I’m just over it. I want the baby. My belly button looks like a cat’s butthole. I’m eating tums like candy. I’m mean. I’m just thankful that I’ve been sleeping well though.

I keep reminding myself to embrace this time as a family of four. Eliza isn’t going to be the baby. Elody will have another sister to love and share with. Wes and I will be transitioning together. It’s a lot of change and I know I’ll miss these days just like I miss when it was just me and Elody. But I also just want to hold my baby and see her face. We’ve had zero profile pics or really ultrasound where we’ve been able to look at her so she is a true mystery baby. I want to smell her and cuddle and see Wes with her. I’m ready.

imheretorescuey0u

And here we are. 38+6.

Dying laughing at me saying Edith was the final baby.

But any who, I have an appointment today. Not much is happening labor wise. I really am fine physically and mentally but I am SO OVER work. I do not want to work any more so I am BEGGING this child to leave my body by Monday. I want my beautiful 18 weeks of paid leave. Shout out to Washington state and my company.

I did walk the mall for about an hour yesterday but with my pelvis pain, it just made me hurt. I was able to pop my pelvis this morning so it feels better. I'm bouncing. I wish I could bone but the very idea of a penis in me makes me want to cry. My vag has nerve pain from however she is sitting. And it sucks.

My belly button does look like a whole butthole again but my heart burn isn't bad! Sleep is fine minus peeing.

Our bags are packed. My camera is charged. My nails are done. The car seat is still in the box. But we are ready. Come on out child no name. Please. Free me from the shackles of work.

Just documenting Bruno. He wouldn't leave me alone while I bounced on my yoga ball yesterday. No baby. No changes so it doesn't mean anything other than he loves me. He's just cute.

I was all "I'm not even stressed about going into labor. It will happen whenever!"

Then Wes came home and my brain was like OKAY WE ARE DONE so now I bounce all day long while I work. I hold deep squats. I'm about to go walk with Elody. I eat ice all day long. I'm not physically done by any means, but I'm mentally READY. I do think I'm mostly ready to be done with work honestly. Like that's a solid 85% of it.

Bouncing on the ball for the first time and I HAD to show the absolute perfection of my pink chrome nails.

38 dang weeks!!!!!

She is free to come any time after tomorrow. I'm not going to stop her.

My pelvis pain is better surprisingly?? Like it's not gone but I'm not dying any more. I'm eating so much ice with like drink powder on it? I'm actively getting my final pre baby pedicure and fill. We have everything we need. (Other than a name). Heart burn is coming for me hard at night. I really love my belly. It's so cute?! She still moves all the time too.

I'm not feeling labor-y at all yet but I know that means nothing. I am looking forward to giving birth with Wesley too. Like, we both enjoy it so honestly. We also cannot wait to see what she looks like, and to snuggle her.

Truly in the final countdown!

37 weeks, officially cleared for the birth center!!

Wes is gone for the next week tho, so she cannot even try to come until he is back. Once he is back, it's game on. Which is wild.

Clothes are washed, things are organized. I need to wash our bedding and deep clean bathrooms. I need to charge my camera. My hospital bag is half packed.

I'm irritated always. I'm tired always. I'm sore always.

The girls are in a volunteer group through the church and they keep asking us to volunteer like I'm not heavily pregnant and I'm annoyed. Thankfully Wes is going to take them.

This babe moves so much but especially when Wes is near. She was chillin and then he came to bed and all the sudden it was party time. Which is so sweet.

My beta strep came back negative.

I've been HORRIBLE at taking my meds which is at least a solid 50% of the reason I'm so irritable.

That's all. See ya next week.

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What doesn't kill us makes us who we are.