¯\_(ツ)_/¯

lena | 21 | korean | bi | she/they | read this before you follow |

[impassionte]

Sometimes being a human being means not being the best you. And that's ok as long as you keep working towards bettering yourself for YOU. I know there are days when life just sucks and work sucks and everything seems like a huge task, but those are the times you focus on the little victories. Frustration and anger and hopelessness are temporary, but suicide is permanent. It will get better.

I can’t feel it now.

Still, I appreciate you taking the time to send me this.

[thedarkperidot]

Signs you grew up lonely

- Chasing people who don’t want you

-Making up lots of stories and worlds

-Overtalking whenever there’s someone to talk to

-Excessive reading

-Daydreaming

-Clinging emotionally to others

-Being the ‘disposable’ friend in the group

-Excessive baths

-Talking to oneself

-Obsessive friendships

-Excessive helpfulness

[ninjamelissajulien]

[impassionte]

it's so funny how I slink back into the habits I hate myself for and withdraw myself to the point that I have no friends. because everything that's upsetting me is literally me just reaping what I've sown and fuck, I forgot the point I was making in the first place. my memory is as shit as my motivation and I can't even be a basic, functioning human being.

anyway, treatment takes too long and I should have died two weeks ago instead of calling my parents and trying to work out what couldn't be worked out in the first place.

[impassionte]

❤💕💖💙💚💛💜🖤💞💝💟💘💓💔💖💗💝💞💙💚💛💜

[impassionte]

Please hold on, life will get better

[impassionte]

Life is worth it, it will get better, hold on and you'll see

yeah ig for -most- people

not including me

[impassionte]

umm so i know i haven’t posted in months and idk who the hell’s actually following me anymore

but like can someone please talk me out of dying

[impassionte]

さよなら

笑

[faunmoss]

In her book Trauma and Recovery, Judith Herman writes about forgiveness (in the context of atrocities and abuse):

“Revolted by the fantasy of revenge, some survivors attempt to bypass their outrage altogether throught a fantasy of forgiveness. This fantasy, like its polar opposite, is an attempt at empowerment. The survivor imagines that she can transcend her rage and erase the impact of the trauma through a willed, defiant act of love. But it is not possible to exorcise the trauma, through either hatred or love. Like revenge, the fantasy of forgiveness often becomes a cruel torture, because it remains out of reach for most ordinary human beings. Folk wisdom recognizes that to forgive is divine. And even divine forgiveness, in most religious systems, is not unconditional. True forgiveness cannot be granted until the perpetrator has sought and earned it through confession, repentance, and restitution.

“Genuine contrition in a perpetrator is a rare miracle. Fortunately, the survivor does not need to wait for it. Her healing depends on the discovery of restorative love in her own life; it does not require that this love be extended to the perpetrator. Once the survivor has mourned the traumatic event, she may be surprised to discover how uninteresting the perpetrator has become to her and how little concern she feels for his fate.“ 

(pages 189-190, Chapter 9, Remembrance and Mourning)

tl;dr: Forgiveness is not a requirement for healing. You can heal and move on without forgiveness. 

It can also harm you and it should never be demanded of you.

And you certainly don’t owe forgiveness to anyone. 

[mochipanko]

[R E F L O R E S C E R E] flower zine

sets 1-3 here

sets 4-6 here

sets 7-9 here

set no. 10

Jade Vine [strongylodon macrobotrys]

Black night Scabiosa [scabiosa atropurpurea]

set no. 11

Chamomile [Matricaria chamomilla]

Groundcherry/Physalis [Physalis peruviana]

set no. 12

[protea]

[chrysanthemum]

[yamideteru]

“don’t let them convince you to file down your claws, to tuck away your fangs, and cut off your mane. they only want you to be soft because they fear you if you’re not.”

— let them fear your ferocity  (via opalynch)

[cherrychocolatemilkshake]

[skyberrii]

“あなたと手をつなぎたいな..” 

[sleepings]

“Home is in my hair, my lips, my arms, my thighs, my feet and my hands. I am my own home. And when I wake up crying in the morning, thinking of how lonely I am, I pinch my skin, tug at my hair, remind myself that I am alive. Remind myself to step outside and greet the morning. Remind myself that it’s all about forward motion. It’s all about change. It’s all about that elusive state. Freedom.”

— Diriye Osman, Fairytales for Lost Children

[oiso178]

170205

[cherieloup]

지니

[kiarakirai-deactivated20200605]