tips for figure skating aus:
definitely theres drama. most of it’s from the parents
crazy figure skating parents??
No seriously. i kno a mom who was arrested 4 child abuse because she didn’t let her daughter sleep for a month before regionals so she wouldn’t grow.
there are of course mean skaters. they’re usually higher level, but not the upper levels. They’re the ones who are good, but wouldn’t ever be good enough for the olympics.
The ones who are good enough for the olympics are either straight up assholes or balls of sunshine.
the Skating Version of Murphy’s Law: which is, if there are 20+ people on the ice, no one will run into each other. if there are 2, you are bound to be seriously injured when u collide- its not an if, it is a when.
coach drama- usually there is one coach that most of em dislike. that they all comment about. (usually to their students)
mocking people’s music as you get annoyed by it. whenever the top tier dancer at our rink does her short to “the lonely goatherder” from the sound of music we both do the biggest fake smile at each other and put our hands on our hips to dance in polka style to it.
that one person who keeps playing their music for 100000 years.
HORRIBLE MUSIC AROUND WINTER / CHRISTMAS.
the Discourse over Ice dance vs Freestyle
Horrible ice dance music. u have standardized music for it. Please do listen to the abomination called the Hickory Hoedown.
ppl who are still salty about programs to “let it go”.
weird instrumentals of pop songs. I still remember someone skting to a string rendition of “that’s what makes you beautiful”.
the flamboyantly gay boy who is 100% in the closet
ANNOYING PAIR SKATERS WHO DONT KNOW WHAT THE PHRASES “I HAVE THE RIGHT OF WAY” AND “EXCUSE ME” MEAN
The copious numbers of girls who like girls who have to deal w/ people making cracks about how its ~male figure skaters~ that r the gay ones.
the phrases “Fuck usfsa” and “fuck IJS” and “fuck 6.0″ and most certainly, “fuck THE JUDGES” being used- especially around competition time.
the dumbest falls are the ones you’re seriously injured in. doesn’t matter if you’re doing like triple jumps. footwork falls are the worst.
When you fall most of the time you sit there and look like you’re contemplating what u have done w/ ur life up until this point.
that one person who thinks they r above everyone and yells EXCUSE ME at everyone else, drawing great ire until someone ballsy purposefully gets in their way.
the munchkins who get in the way of everything. if you collide with them, you’re the one getting hurt, not them.
“sharking”- aka when a skater gets close to u on purpose when they’re trying to get around, and scares the SHIT out of u bc they almost hit u, but not quite.
No one respectable wears a skating dress 2 practice anymore. they r for competition only. basically everyone wears pants to the rink and a few will wear like exercise shorts over tights.
heavily censored pop music playing on sessions.
the wet spot on the ice that you inevitably fall in and get soaked in.
stepping on the ice w/ ur guards still on and falling over like a dipshit.
driving to competitions and feeling like ur ready to strangle ur parents for not buying a plane ticket to a competition that’s a 17 hour drive away.
these r all based around true stories.
