clandestine @irrelevantbarbie - Tumblr Blog

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* melody -> 19 -> whore in theory *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

logged into discord for the first time in forever to see that my ex best friend that i haven’t talked to in 2 years sent me a message like 3 months ago. wtf. 😃😃

#i am…..i’m…….#i don’t know how to feel #this is just so crazy i never expected to talk to them again

literally feel like i’m losing all personal time to school and work….. like pls tell me why i can’t do anything when i have time off without feeling guilty for not working on my class 😐😐

#plus i have to be done with it by february!!! and yes i know i could ask for an extension #but doing that on my first fucking class would be so embarrassing #i wanna write so bad but my computer is in the repair shop cries sobs screams #but even if it wasn’t i still probably wouldn’t be able to write anything bc not working on college stuff stresses me out now i hate it here

literally about to die from one class how tf am i supposed to do 4 years worth of them 🥹🥹

#cries. sobs.

closer to being done with my first college course Thank God

#i have so many things i wanna finish up and post but work and college take up literally all my time 🥴🥴#hoping i pass my first test tho bc it would be super embarrassing to fail it lol #sigh

hmm feeling like i wanna commit m*rder in the most unsexy of ways live laugh love

#i hate my mom’s husband :)

literally going to cry and have a mental breakdown live laugh love el oh el we live in a society

#literally want to run away and never be perceived by people who know me ykwim

the way i’ve been anxious for like a month straight now <3 lol <3

#that tight feeling in my chest literally just won’t go away i love being mentally ill </3 #start my first college class soon and even though it won’t be for a while i already know im going to fail math so bad #and probably science too now that i think about it and that’s gonna make my gpa go down the drain and then i’ll be expelled and and and #why did i ever think this was a good idea i’m not fucking smart enough for college even if it is a small christian one #and then there’s the teacher’s convention this week #aka going to a crowded strange place filled with strangers who might try to talk to me and having to be in certain places at certain times #my life is turning into a nightmare #live laugh love <3

we love living in a society where i feel useless and dumb <3