ISOLAMANIA

Welcome, to the greatest event in all of fake sports entertainment. This.. is ISOLAMANIA! [Affiliated with Isola Radiale]

[isolamania]

[isolamania]

[isolamania]

[isolamania]

We here at Isolamania are proud to unveil our second championship belt. The Isolamania Musical Championship. This title can only be won by those who prove their superiority in the field of musical arts. Be it singing or the playing of musical instruments. The championship is as of yet vacant, though deliberations are underway as to who the first Musical Champion will be. We will be keeping an eye on our talent closely as we try to come to a decision.

[isolamania]

NAME: harpy.

AGE: 22.

GENDER: female.

RACE: human.

DESIRED POSITION: competitor.

PHYSICAL HEALTH: healthy. it’s pretty rare that phase users get sick.

STRENGTHS: aerial combat, agile, stealing, kicking.

WEAKNESSES: alcohol, children.

RING NAME: oh, just “harpy” will do.

MOTIVATION: getting to dance in battle with strong women and attractive men. ho ho, it’s pretty thrilling thinking about it. and maybe to check out a few things back stage while i’m here…

WOULD YOU KICK YOUR BOSS’ ASS?: i’m bored of answering questions now. ♡

------------------------------------------------------------

“『I feel like I  may be in danger, but you’re cute so you’re hired anyway!』”

[isolamania]

Name: Zhang Bao

Age: 17

Gender:  人

Race: Human? yeah human. 

Desired position: Medical personal 

Physical health: Perfectly healthy!!! ish. maybe. I can lift a person even when their dying! 

Strengths: I like taking care of people. I know a lot of alcohol uses and mmmmmmm i know how to make a good meat bun? and bandages! lots of them. I know how to use them a lot. 

Weaknesses:  girls 

Ring name: mmmm doctor man? no… i’m just medical personal so … just bao?  Yeah. “Bao.”

Motivation: needless harmful actions to people concern me a lot that I can’t stand by and watch people get hurt by this really silly thing but it also looks kind of fun???

Would you kick your boss’ ass?:『I don’t even know the boss so no?]

-----------------------------------------------------

“『Ooooh, even more medical hands! Maybe now we’ll actually be able to treat broken bones. Hired!』”

[isolamania]

[This one seems to be written in crayon, for some reason…]

Name: Naoto Kurogane

Age: 17

Gender: ♂

Race: comic relief

Desired position: combat competitor, so i can get beat up by everyone

Physical health: no issues, other than being a LOSER

Strengths: absolutely none

Weaknesses: [What follows is a surprisingly comprehensive list of every weakness known to mankind, including ‘fear of ghosts’ and 'wets the bed’.]

Ring name: loser lad

Motivation: to get beaten up in front of a live audience

Would you kick your boss’ ass?:『I would not only never kick Kumagawa Misogi’s ass, but I worship him and respect him as the true champion of Isolamania. #Kumagawa2k18 』

-----------------------------------------------------

“『Hehehehehehehe-- I mean- Hired! This is a completely legitimate application and not at all forged in any way! Hehehehe...』”

[isolamania]

Apple-kay-shun

[The following is written mostly in chicken scratch]

Name: Taos Name is Taokaka

Age: …I forgot. i’m not a kitten though! tao’s old enough!

Gender: Female

Race: Kaka

Desired position: Competitor

Physical health: Tao’s Healthy! 

Strengths: Tao’s a super fast kaka! And stuper stong too!

Weaknesses: Tao has no weakness! [Food, overwhelmingly strong people, her gullibility]

Ring name: AGILE EDGE TAO!! Tao did something once to get that name, but I can’t remember

Motivation: Tao’s been itchin to play with some people! and if tao wins and gets money, that’s even better!!! 

Would you kick your boss’ ass?: Tao can kick ass! But Tao would only kick Average Guy’s butt if he wanted to play with Tao! But nyeo. Tao won’t fight Average Guy.

-------------------------------------------

“『H-Hired.』”

[isolamania]

Application here!

Name: Jamison Fawkes Just Junkrat, mate.

Age: 25

Gender: Male

Race: Human!

Desired position: A Bookie! I’ll be taking care of any money coming our way with a charge fee of course.

Physical health: Well I got nothing to defend myself. Unless yer weak to water balloons.

Strengths: Pretty intelligent if I do say so myself.~

Weaknesses: Umm… anyone shooting me from the sky.

Ring name: Junkrat

Motivation: For the moneeeey~

Would you kick your boss’ ass?: Will I get paid extra if I do or don’t?

-------------------------------------------------------------

“『You seem like a trustworthy person and not at all sketchy in the slightest. You’re hired!』”

[isolamania]

Name: Sanji

Age: 21

Gender: Male

Race: Human

Desired position: Competitor

Physical health: No issues

Strengths: Master cook. Master kicker

Weaknesses:  Women, moss haired bastards

Ring name: Mr. Prince

Motivation: I might as well find some way to work off the rust. If this place gives me people to kick or put my cooking skills against, that’s just perfect.

Would you kick your boss’ ass?: If he ever disrespected a lady? In a heartbeat.

------------------------------------------------------------

“『What was that? I was thinking about girls in naked aprons. Anyways, hired, I guess. I don’t know how marketable your dumb curly brow is though.』”

[isolamania]

Name: Sidon

Age: Fish years

Gender: Male

Race: Zora

Desired position: Competitor

Physical health: No issues in terms of physical health

Strengths: Fast swimmer, expert bowman and spearman. Boundless optimism and bravery.

Weaknesses:  Boundless optimism and bravery. Far too trusting.

Ring name: Sidon

Motivation: Link? I saw Links name being mentioned! Link, my friend! It is i, Sidon! Link! I am here!

Would you kick your boss’ ass?: I do not believe I would?

----------------------------------------------------------

.. That’s a big shark man. With very sharp rows of teeth. It’s giving him Rosa vibes, which has scared him into silence. He’s hired, though. Just.. don’t eat him.

[isolamania]

[isolamania]

[isolamania]

Name: Cross

Age: uh maybe like 20?

Gender: Female

Race: Human (Mimeosome)

Desired position: Competitor

Physical health: Great condition

Strengths: Amazing with a sword!

Weaknesses: Not so amazing with anything else. And currently lacking her signature abiltiies, Offensive and Defensive Stance.

Ring name: Cross, the Uncontrollable

Motivation: I want to see how my skills compare against everyone else’s! Besides, a good fight sounds like fun.

Would you kick your boss’ ass?: No

---------------------------------------------------------------

“『Hmmmm. I like your fighting spirit, lady! I hope you beat up a bunch of dudes! Hired!』”

[isolamania]

Name: Shade

Age: definitely 30

Gender: Male

Race: definitely human

Desired position: Manager

Physical health: Fit

Strengths: “Quite frankly? I am intelligent and hard-working. You’d be a fool not to hire me.”

Weaknesses: “Nothing relevant.”

Ring name: N/A

Motivation: “A position of power is never a bad thing.”

Would you kick your boss’ ass?: “Haha.”

------------------------------------------------

“『Oh, wow. Someone actually wants to be a manager! I honestly didn’t expect that. Hope you find the right competitor for you! Hired!』”

[isolamania]

Name: Vash The Stampede

Age: …… young at heart?

Gender: male

Race: Plant

Desired position: competitor!

Physical health: please-don’t-break-my-face-itis

Strengths: can shoot things real good

Weaknesses:  I don’t like hurting people ):

Ring name: n/a

Motivation: Please Give Me Money I Eat So Much Food

Would you kick your boss’ ass?: no…?

--------------------------------------------------------------------

“『Wait. That’s your actual name? Not a ring name? Huh.. Well, at least it’s marketable. Hired!』”

[isolamania]

Our current list of best sellers. We regret to inform you that all Merchandise related to head commentator Neo has sold out. Further pre-orders will be delayed for the time being.

Also, we do not have merchandise related to a ‘Caster’. Please stop asking us.