writer’s month prompt: day 2 | dancer au (bucky barnes/natasha romanov)
Beautiful, James thinks as he watches the ballerina spin across the stage.
There are many of them, lithe women in white leotards and frilly skirts, all dancing in perfect synchronization; however, there is a singular one that catches his eye. Pale skin, sharp cheekbones, hair as red as her painted lips. She has a solo – is that what they’re called? Ballet is so foreign to him – where it’s just her and the music and he is enchanted. Her actions appear effortless, but James knows better. No one glides that gracefully without training. Precision is a learned skill, and her dedication is admirable. He can’t see fire in her eyes, but determination is highlighted across her pretty face, drawing him in.
The ballet is in town for a week, and James goes each night. He doesn’t tell his buddies where he’s going each night, and when they ask, he spins a tale about seeing a girl. It’s close enough to the truth that it’s not a complete lie. He is, after all, visiting the ballet solely for the pretty ballerina, but that’s not the image that conjures in the minds of his friends when he says such things, and James is fine to let them think such sordid things. He has a reputation to keep. What would they say if they knew about him running off to the ballet each night?
Insane. Mental. Fit to be committed. Not for the admiration of dance, mind you. James’ closest friend, Steve Rogers, is something of an artist himself and would respect James actually attempting to engage with an art of some form. No, the teasing and dubious looks would be the result of him sneaking into an opera house – because he sure as hell doesn’t have the money – to see a woman who doesn’t know him from Adam.
There’s the rub: To her, James Buchanan Barnes is no one. He’s not even James Buchanan Barnes to her, she knows not who he is, but just another nameless man in the crowd, and that’s if she can even see him. James has his doubts. Regardless, it’s a treat to see her. He doesn’t need her to know him, being in her presence is —
Bucky wakes with a start. Light from the city filters into his apartment. An ambulance sounds in the distance, causing Alpine’s ears to flicker in recognition. He rubs a hand over his face, the metal cool against his skin. He presses himself up from the bed, Alpine’s eye’s following him from her perch on his bed as he shuffles to the bathroom. He twists the knob and cold water pours from the faucet before he wets his face.
She’s in his dreams again, Natalia. The dreams – fantasies, whatever – come few and further between nowadays, but they’ve never fully gone away. He wonders if they ever will or if he ever wants them to. The dreams take different forms – sometimes grounded in reality, memories of better days, and others of different worlds – what if, what if, what if?
Right now, Natalia – the real Natalia – is miles away. Even if she were somewhere nearby, she is still not his. Out of reach. Doubt combats hope when he ponders the possibility of a future. Too much shit has happened, and neither of them are the same people they were when they parted. But Bucky can’t deny that he still loves her, will always love her. Even in his dreams, where even there she is elusive and far away.
written for: @writersmonth
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