Hi again guys!! I think Iβve gotten a good fraction into my story, but Iβd like to know what you all think before I move farther.
The summer after senior year moved achingly slow. Your brand new diploma sitting uselessly up in a picture frame, passing by it every time you go up or down the stairs. A weighing memento of the 13 years you spent mostly in solitude. 7 hours a day. Five days a week. For so long all you had was a childhood friend, Nancy Wheeler, the girl you remember staying out with until dinner time, playing on bikes around town and visiting little music stores, doing makeup terribly, all the little girl things until the two of you grew into women. You, as a woman, were soft, sweet, insanely-weapon gradely intelligent. You have always been strongly feminine, your unabashed love for unicorns, always showing up with makeup despite just on a grocery run.
That loneliness was until meeting Edward James Munson. Hawkins pariah. The name you didnβt go a day without hearing. Walking the halls? Heard at least something about the βfreak.β His demonic club that, from your perspective, was just some intricate fantasy game. His side hustles; drug dealing, playing in a, once again, demonic band. Music that would taint your soul and corrupt your morals. Apparently, in short, he was a no good-generational-devil worshiping heathen.
Nancy introduced you to the βheathen.β Sure, he had sassy outbursts, had his own aesthetic, did in fact sell drugs. However, heβs fallen out the drug selling after graduation. Working at an auto shop just outside Hawkins, trying to make a living. The highly looked upon god knows he will not be getting into a college, so luckily he had an early start with auto mechanics from grooming of his felon dad. All of that put to the side, you thought he was the most handsome freak in the universe. The first day meeting him, you were hooked. His wiry, tall body subsequently filled by lean muscles from transporting amplifiers and guitars, working on janky vehicles that were brought in. He was just so sexy to you. It was honestly just a bonus, being that he was insanely sweet and hooked to you too just as quickly. When introducing yourself in the dim lighting of the sorry excuse for a bar, it was sickening for the friends around you.
You stood beside Nancy and Jonathon nervously, in a bar for the first time to support a friend of her friend. You did not belong there at all, all soft and feminine. A woman clearly of morals, in the area reluctantly. Eddie notices you while talking between Christopher Lacon and Ashton Rock, his pals from around that matched aesthetics but looked entirely different. Approaching Nancy and you.
βWould you like to introduce me, Wheeler?β
He said in a smooth, tranquil voice, not taking his eyes off of you until he got the inquiry out.
βI would had you not been chatting it up.β
She then introduced the two of you, Eddie followed with a fond smile. He reached out to shake your hand which you extend yours in acceptance. He holds it and covers the rest of your hand with his other.
βHi.β You said sheepishly with a smile to match, the thoughts in your mind were a stark contrast.
Eddie, charmed by the characteristic as he smiled back. βYou have actually lived here your whole life? Iβm upset I never noticed.β
He scrutinized with genuine disappointment, dropping his hands to his sides. βGuess I have tonight to make up.β A boyish, crooked grin takes his face, reaching up to scratch the back of his neck. Not too sure what to do with his hands anymore now that they arenβt touching you. He felt repulsed yet intrigued by the immediate attraction to such a contrast of a girl.
Reminder, this is my first story and I really would like some tips and critiquing