LiveChild

Catching fragments of broken light...

[livechild]

Things I know...

I know that I love you... ...I've never been sure enough of anything else

[livechild]

The Weight

Lying on my back counting the heart beats from my chest Trying to recall all of the reasons that you left And I can hear you now In the back of my head Can you still feel me now? That we are crumbling I never wanted love to hurt us both like this And now I'm lost in circles drifting aimlessly I feel I'm nearing towards the end of what I've known Beyond the lines where I win fear and lose my home I've been such a cynic, I've been wasting all my breaths Instead of standing up and pushing through what I have left And I am dreaming now That you're back in my bed And it calms me down Just pretending you're here with me right now I never wanted love to hurt us both like this And now I'm lost in circles drifting aimlessly I feel I'm nearing towards the end of what I've known Beyond the lines where I win fear and lose my home And I'm sinking in And I can't help it now And I'm sinking in And I can't help it now And I'm sinking in And I think I am going to drown

[livechild]

Her Breath. My Blood.

She crawled upon my skin and nestled her burrow between the fibres of my weave. Lock-jaw clamped down tight, her poison oxidising the blood in my purple veins. She runs through every inch of me and I cannot fling her from this graveyard; I cannot shed the skin she’s made. She’s built her tombstone from the inside out, to part my gaze from the company of itself. And when I left the door ajar to let her in, she fumigated my mind and left me with a poisoned heart that won't ever let me let her go. One half of me is gone, and the half that remains is empty. For this, movement has become a language I no longer understand, because without her I am stuck.

[livechild]

From We to Me to You

I’m constantly all too aware of the fact that this could be the last time I wake up Every heartbeat is perfectly in tune with the second hand counting down And I'm certain that the distance between the tick's is lessening with each beat

I’m constantly all too aware of the fact that I’m still right here and you’re not Your ghost is haunting me, sifting through the weaves of fabric that we sewed together One by one, it's unpicking the threads that still bind us to one another

And I never knew that I could miss someone so much...

You know I caught your smell just the other day while walking to the kitchen And in that moment I could swear that you were right there with me It was as though I had stepped out onto the ledge of our world and bent the shards of time Just to get a glimpse of you in a parallel universe In a universe where things had worked out between you and I

But I know I’m alone here. And although you fill every inch of the walls between my ears I know that universe is not ours...

Our universe was the one that split the seam at the weak point and leaked out onto the pavement The one that pried me open and stained my heart with your love

And the familiar grief that it always seemed to be entwined with...

[livechild]

The Halls of Amenti

The push pull battle of parity Is the separation of my mind One minute furled in gravity And the next, decayed by time

It's the convoluted make-up Of the fragments slowed between The strands of life's containment And the answers in it's seams

But it's hard to paint the portrait When the ends begin to blur Where who you know you've always been Becomes only who you were

Sometimes the answer lies between The paper and the pen And other times it's buried in The bottle's bitter end

It's a slanted misdirection Where you're stuck between the walls Direction lost in quantum wake A life reduced to halls

But there's no exchanging revelry For a state of mind contrived Instead just weaving through calamity Until a hollow's hive’s confined

[livechild]

A Journey On Pause

It's been one year, three months since last I was here One year, three months since I needed you dear And in one year, three months I am nothing more Than one year, three months older than I was before

[watchoutforintellect]

I forgive you for what you did not do. I am impossibly guilty. And if I lie, I lie because I love you, Because I am bothered by the things I do, Because your hurt invades my calm white skin

Anne Sexton, from ‘My Friend, My Friend’ (via c-ovet)

[livechild]

You Are Free To Become Whatever Shape Of Circle You Want

Put a man in a round room for his entire life and he will not be able to describe for you any other shape. For he will know only of the characteristics that his round room have described for him. In this man's world, squares and triangles do not exist nor does a concept or understanding of such shapes.

You see, this is how we function in education, religion, self awareness, interpersonal interaction, thought processing, sport, the workplace and virtually every aspect of human existence. We feed our entire population circles, force them to grow into one and push them into their circular holes. And when one of us doesn't like the taste of circles and becomes a square or a triangle, we continue to try and jam them into the circular hole we've made for them. But they won't fit, so we label them useless or stupid and convince them that they are broken or damaged or in need of help and we outcast them. We usher them into believing that their existence is futile and that they will never amount to anything and we hoard them off with the other squares and triangles, away from our circular society.

We've designed these circles and their circular holes with a one-size-fits-all policy and we refuse to open our eyes to the fundamental differences of those that simply cannot become a circle. Instead of nurturing them into their natural shape, we bash and bend them until they are unrecognisable as anything other than a mistake; a defect.

We have boxed ourselves in; we are landlocked and imprisoned by these circles we've designed. We accept one norm and write off all variables. We supress the creative and criticise a lack of innovation and in the off chance that a triangle or square does slip through the hole and create something truly amazing, we attack it and tear it to shreds in fear of disrupting our society of circles.

More than anything else, we are in need of a quantum paradigm shift that is progressive towards creating a different array of holes suitable for the different shapes we create and develop. Instead of this societal brute-force-feeding of a norm we must move towards accepting the variables as crucial to contrasting and progressing from the norm itself. Until this happens, we will continue on this merry-go-round, circling and cycling around and around again; in perpetual motion, but never really moving anywhere.

It's time for our ouroboros to spit out its tail. We must unfurl this circular blue-print and re-discover what it means to be a line.

[livechild]

Burning Nerium

I hate when I see you And I don't want to be This broken man collapsing And falling at your feet

But you will never notice coz I won't let you see That my smile hides the hole that you left inside of me

And your turning like a corkscrew Driving deep down into me Into memories I locked up When I threw away the key

Coz it's taken me this long to finally break away And I'm scared this life was over the day you walked away

And I don't think that I'll ever completely break away But I swear this life was over the day I walked away

Without you

Without you

[theinterpretations]

Hands

I miss your hands. I doubt you can understand Deeper than a touch The reason I was in love A massage of the crown An energy to which I was bound Where my fingers found a stage A connection beyond the page A Connection couldn’t handle all your rage.

-Sonia Salvatore

[livechild]

Awesome!

[wildnotmild]

That awkward moment when you realize you actually like who you are.

[livechild]

An unnerving revelation; but a progressive necessity....

[livechild]

Otherworldly

We stumbled across your caveat in the midst of a warmths creation; an accident in the waiting, our gaze was unsuspecting...

At first glimpse, your chest was lifeless; just dead space closed and drifting, with partners 8 the same. On second approach, we saw mildew among your caveat’s walls, seeping over your vast planes and into the cracks in your skin. Your dead space wasn’t dead at all and below that surface was a thickening pulse. Crawling and infested. Creeping with your kind…

So on third approach we readied for our venture into the abyss. Breaching floods of blue, piercing swirls of white; crash landing in your skin. You never saw us coming so we crept under the rug, and hid there in the lurch...

And ever since that fateful day we spliced our worlds together, we’ve been scared to see the light; scared to show our face. We hide in fear of your kind, for if you can kill your own with such consummate ease then what would you do with us? It's a question that we've never wanted an answer to...

So we hide and wait for rescue; petrified of our strange surroundings. Here on your pale blue dot, we drift. And we wait....and we wait...and wait....

[livechild]

Dissolve/Radiate

With create My screws will turn in And your eyes, they'll sharpen So my draw lines can fade, And your nightlights can darken

In destroy Your ouroborous will open And my enso, unfurl As fresh palettes flush colour In renditions of a girl

[absurdgrace]

We’re doing it. Or something. We’re doing something really big. And I work all day, and I come home and work some more, yet my brain won’t shut up.

Is it joy? Satisfaction? I need a vacation so badly I can taste the campfire between my teeth. Exhaustion has become my fucking cliché. Still, one...

[livechild]

Awesome...

[livechild]

Safer On The Shore

Who knows where I should go from here My heart's seemingly set out on a fearless voyage To make captive of the asphyxiate horizon To cast illumine to the dark ocean floor To forge life from the waters edge But it's my head, you see The fear inside my head isn't fearless at all It's those bursting screams that filled the night sky Over and over and over again And a failure to distant the remnant memory of The fleets of ships that now make home of the ocean floor Fleets that spliced my reality into fifty shades of fear I'm haunted by the ghosts of those vessels And so I keep my fear in a jar beside my bed I keep it locked up and safely away from those seas Far enough so that it will never have to feel the cold ocean's shore Encumbered by land, it lays calmly asleep But there is a bigger fear growing beneath my skin And inside of these bones A fear that I may never find a way to release it and The day it awakens, I'll be the banquet upon which it will feast ..and so my heart is heavied

[livechild]

Never let your dragon sleep. Wake him up!

[livechild]

Coercive Conception

She crawled upon my skin And nestled her burrow between the fibres of my weave Lock-jaw clamping down so tight Her poison oxidising the blood in my purple veins She runs through every inch of me And I cannot fling her from this graveyard I cannot shed the skin she's made She's built her tombstone from the inside out To part my gaze from the company of itself But to spare myself from parting company with it's gaze And when I left the door ajar to let her in She coerced conceptions in your dwellings as well