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PHINEAS BLACKWELL, therapist MACKENZIE CHOI, mortician  dependent mumu blog for theikoshq, penned by boog

[mccnlitsins]

goaskxlys​:

☆

Alice smiled a little more genuinely this time. “Oh really? Thanks that’s…sweet.” She let out a quiet laugh. Maybe an aquarium wouldn’t be so bad after all. It was definitely a more neutral place than anywhere else she could think of. There was less pressure and that was actually nice for one.

The red-head smirked as she held the bag out. “There you go, help yourself!” Mackenzie’s new excitement seemed like it was going to be infectious. Her eyebrows raised slightly in thought before she nodded her head. “Oh sure. That actually sounds pretty cool. I wonder if they have those horseshoe crabs here. You know, the things that are as old as the dinosaurs. We should see about those too. They look pretty cool.” Alice added. At least they didn’t say something about being excited to see some small silly fish. 

it’s always beautiful seeing people smile, somethings that the dead can’t do, something so beautifully alive that gives mackenzie hope - as small as that may be. “you’re welcome, i’m excited to spend time with you today.” mackenzie spoke softly, looking at the other with warmth. 

there’s a pause after the offer, before mack grabs a chunk and takes a bite; watching as their lip gloss stays on the remaining candy floss and starts to melt a little bit. it’s like the video of the raccoon dropping the candy floss in the puddle and watching it disappear, something so simple yet so entrancing. mack loved this stuff, watching it all with a soft wonder. “oh yes! those things are beautiful, the natural preservation of them is wonderous! i’m certain they’d have it...” mack bounced a little, looking over at her. “we should follow the usual route but just walk faster through the boring bits, i don’t think there are any kind of shortcuts to the sharks...” they smiled, as they started to walk towards the entrance.

[mccnlitsins]

mancalledmxlice​:

☆

Damien thought his therapist would be happy to hear him quote them. Sure he was mostly messing around, but at least something had sank in over the years. “You being an optimist? Did you take new year new me too seriously,” he raised as eyebrow as his coffee arrived at the table and he started to rip into a few packets of sugar. “Oh yeah. A super fancy party, too! There was a lot of free alcohol but I guess I just wanted to really be able to enjoy myself for once,” he shrugged his shoulders as he took a sip of his coffee. A smirk spread across his face as he set the cup down again. “I might actually take you up on that. I think you need to get out and have a fun night or something.” Damien leaned back in his seat and nodded his head slowly. “Seriously? Huh, that’s definitely interesting. What is she afraid of about it or is it just the whole thing? The crocodile is pretty creepy, I’ll give her that!”

both brothers had a hard time relearning what ‘okay’ was, but there was something to heartwarming about it sticking for damien, phineas was proud of his younger brother - not that he’d actually say something so cheesy out loud. with a shrug, phineas smiled a little. “what, you don’t think that i should get those ‘live laugh love’ posters in my office? i could be the next great self help guru.” he laughed, shaking his head at the thought. “an open bar? that shows a lot of self-restraint, that’s wonderful.” he smiled,  looking at the coffee that sat in front of him. at the hint, phineas just shrugged, noting that their coping mechanisms were totally different, but at least damien was working through it. phineas could help fix others, but it was harder when it came to himself, acknowledging just how traumatized her was. “whatever you want... as long as it’s not a strip club again.” he laughed, pushing away his thoughts. “the whole thing, but there’s that whole thing where wendy stitches peter’s shadow back onto his feet, and i think that’s the part that got her. who knew kids movies had that much body horror?”

[mccnlitsins]

oldgcds​:

* ✶ ━

the most important thing in any relationship, whether romantic or platonic or familial, according to minni, was trust. and she trusted her sibling with her life and those of everyone she loved. mackenzie never mocked her, always took an interest in her work and made sure that minni never felt like she wasn’t seen or appreciated. if she ever needed advice or guidance, mack was the go-to person for her and she would be eternally grateful. even if she was angry that the whole reason they hadn’t moved out yet was to be around minni.

but it wasn’t a big deal, since they still got along great and made sure to pretend to look at apartments and houses every once in a while. and, of course, meet up as often as possible to grab coffee and judge everyone around them. “i watched this trashy mini series about an asteroid slamming into the moon once, it sucked ass. but they didn’t discuss that.” minni shrugged, leaning back in her chair with her cup in her hands. “i guess it’s the same question as ‘if a tree falls in a forest’, you know. if there’s no one there to see the ghosts, are they still there? i don’t know.”

there’s a bright smile on mackenzie’s face whenever minni is around. they’re filled with dark thoughts, but minni manages to bring the sunshine to them, and maybe it’s selfish of them, but they don’t want minni to leave them, for them to move out and they just saw each other once a week. minni was mackenzie’s other half, and maybe the dependency was unhealthy but they didn’t care anymore. they grew up together, and that’s all they wanted for the rest of their life. apartment ‘hunting’ was fun when realtors hyped up what was simply four walls and a roof, but they just didn’t have the heart to do it. 

“ugh, those documentaries are always boring, why do you watch them?” they joked, shaking their head with a bright smile. “most people never think about the ghosts, they deserve better...” mack paused at the next words, taking a moment to sip on their coffee to think about it. “i’m never good at rhetoricals... it makes me sad. like... the way that no one around us notice them, and imagine a world where we don’t either- where there’s no ghost adventures or- ... anything.”

[mccnlitsins]

goaskxlys​:

☆

Alice felt a little more at ease now that she had been able to meet up with her date. She was pleasantly surprised. At least they were good looking even if they did seem a little shy. “Oh well, then I guess I’ll call you Mac!” She flashed Mackenzie a bright smile. “But yes, I’m Alice. I’m afraid I don’t have any nicknames for you to call me,” she joked. 

The red-head glanced around awkwardly for a moment before she held up the bag in her hand. “I would shake your hand, but my fingers are probably sticky. I got some cotton candy and other stuff if you want any.” She might as well be nice. “I figured we could speed through most of the small fish and get to the cool stuff! You know, sharks. Jellyfish. I mean, if you’re alright with that.”

as the woman spoke, mackenie just smiled, shaking her head. “alice is beautiful, it’s nice and short, you don’t need a nickname.” they smiled, head falling to the side a little as they spoke. they were getting more comfortable with the other, and somewhere as neutral as the aquarium allowed them to breathe a little easier. 

at the mention of sugar, mackenzie beamed a smile and nodded their head. “ah i would love some, thank you- i haven’t had cotton candy in forever, but i remember how fun it is.” they grinned, before thinking about alice’s words. “oh totally, i’d love it if we could stop so i can take photos of the preserved animals, but other than that you can lead the way!” they grinned, rocking on the balls of their feet. was it macabre to want to see the intricacies of preserving squid? slightly, but mac was never one for normalcy.

[mccnlitsins]

mackenzie adores their baby sister. minni was always the one to push the limits as they grew up, and mack would always follow her, making sure she didn’t hurt herself. they hunted ghosts together and would help their parents in the hotel when they needed. now that they both had grown up, they made sure that life wouldn’t get in the way, and mack made sure to grab lunch with minni whenever they had the time. sending a quick text to their sister, mack left the hospital and headed to their favourite cafe. 

as their sister walked in, mackenzie’s smile grew and they waved her over to their usual spot. it wasn’t a busy cafe, which made it perfect for when they wanted the space to talk. “okay hear me out... if the moon like, exploded or whatever, we know the tides would be gone, but would the ghosts be okay? every story talks about them being illuminated by moonlight... so what would happen.” they mumbled, looking at minni with full sincerity. 

@oldgcds​

[goaskxlys]

Was amping herself up with sugar supposed to be a good idea? Probably not but it was a better idea than pulling out her vape around some soccer mom in order to calm herself down. She had a lot of questions for whoever had decided to send her to an aquarium of all places. Alice wasn’t worried about what anyone thought of her but dates were weird when you didn’t even know who you were meeting. The red-head grabbed the bag from the counter as she checked out in the small gift shop. 

She wandered back out and couldn’t help but check her phone again as she sighed in annoyance. Her gaze settled on a small bench near the front of the lobby and she wandered over to sit down and wait. Alice was about a quarter of a way through her bag of cotton candy when she noticed someone looking sort of lost. Let’s get this over with she sighed as she pulled herself to her feet and stowed her cotton candy back in the bag. With her non candy covered hand, she reached out and tapped the person on the shoulder. “Excuse me. Do you happen to be Mackenzie?”

@mccnlitsins​

[mccnlitsins]

love wasn’t common to them, as mackenzie only really dealt with the effects of it. scorned lovers, tragic deaths, and a legitimately broken heart for one old man. the whole valentines day thing never appealed to them, finding it rather annoying- all that sugar and expectation. almost every year they spent it hard at work, but when they got an invitation to a lupercalia celebration, who were they to say no... 

the easy part was getting there, the harder part was actually knowing who they were supposed to meet. someone named alice... that wasn’t exactly much to go on, so they just stood there looking like a fish out of water until someone tapped them on the shoulder.

“oh! you surprised me- i uh, yes! i’m mackenzie, you can call me mac if you prefer... you must be alice, it’s a pleasure to meet you.” they smiled, thankful they had worn a large coat that almost swallowed them up- like a shield for their own awkardness. 

[mementomoriism]

closed starter for @mccnlitsins​

Levi was almost going to be that asshole who stood up his “date”. Almost. When the strange letter arrived at his apartment, he was going to pretend he never opened it. Until he brought up it up at his last therapy session. His therapist told him it was a good idea for him to get out. Meet people outside of work. Broaden the horizon of his usual company at the bar. It took a good half a day for Levi to agree to go. But he wasn’t going to be thrilled out it. Or be sober.

Levi arrived at the popular bowling alley, and he was already dreading this. Bowling wasn’t much of his thing. He had done it as a child once or twice but it was never something he deemed fun. He went up to the front desk, giving them his name. He was the first of the two to arrive, and they led Levi back to the VIP Lanes that were set up for them. Levi made himself comfortable on the sofas in the room. He was given instructions on how to use the projectors and operate the sound system. He didn’t give much attention knowing he was going to use them tonight. The only thing he cared to know was how to order drinks. While he waited, Levi ordered some drinks. He knew nothing of this Phineas that was supposed to meet him but he hoped he at least like to drink. 

Levi slouched back into the sofa, listening to the other people just outside the room when he turned his head at the sound of the door opening. He thought it might be the employee back with his drinks at first. “That was faster than I thought-”  Levi straightened up in his seat, cutting himself off. He paused when he saw the older man instead of the young employee. “Are you Phineas? Because otherwise you have the wrong room.”

[mccnlitsins]

romance was not something that phineas enjoyed, so the whole manufactured ‘st. valentines day’ was something that he could live without. but when the intricate letter arrived at his doorstep, he couldn’t deny that it had piqued his curiousity and though phineas knew he had a lot of work to do on himself before romance was even thought of, it would be a good excuse to meet someone new, maybe find a friend. as it came closer and closer to the date, phineas kept wondering about who might show up, who his brother was paired with- and if either of them would survive the night. 

phineas hadn’t been bowling in what felt like forever, but he was under the safe assumption it was similar to axe throwing and target practice; just use to projectile to hit a target. the nuances would come later. when he arrived at the front desk and checked in, the attendant noted that the other had already entered and ordered drinks. to be safe, phineas ordered some vegetarian nachos -playing it safe- and followed the instructions to the door. 

as the door opened and the other spoke, phineas smiled politely, shaking his head at the words. “phineas blackwell, it’s a pleasure to meet you.” the introduction was curt, but as he took of his coat and sat down, phineas took the time to get settled. “you must be levi, right? the attendant will be back in a minute, but i took the opportunity to order nachos- it’s best if we break up the alcohol with some carbs.”

[mccnlitsins]

mancalledmxlice​:

Damien always felt a little better when he was around his older brother. Whether it was because he understood him a little more than most people or not, he couldn’t really say. All he knew that he could always call Phineas if he needed something. “Progress is progress,” Damien nodded his head sagely before he let out a snort of laughter. “I’m aiming for less than five years.” He tapped his fingers on the table. “Speaking of! I made it through a fancy party without getting totally blackout drunk so I think that’s a cause for celebration!” Damien ran a hand through his hair as he raised an eyebrow. “Jesus, that sucks. What can you really do about something like that, man?”

as damien spoke, phineas smiled at the words that sounded as if they were straight out of a therapy session. they both knew well what it sounded like, they had both been through the system for a long time- frankly it was comforting to hear the words come from damien, maybe something had stuck. “I think you might manage it in three.. and that’s being optimistic.” phineas joked, shaking his head. laughing at the thought, phineas grinned at his younger brother. “a whole party? well it sounds like we need to get blackout drunk to celebrate.” phineas grinned, shaking his head. “that’s the million dollar question, right? at least we’re getting to the root of it, you remember that old peter pan film? that whole movie terrifies her.”

[gcddss]

𝕠𝕡𝕖𝕟  𝕤𝕥𝕒𝕣𝕥𝕖𝕣

it  had  been  another  busy  day  at  the  bakery,  something  that  seemed  to  be  normal  these  days.  addilyn  was  happy  her  shift  was  over,  but  she  did  feel  bad  that  her  dad  and  victoria  were  going  to  be  by  themselves,  even  if  it  did  slow  down  before  she  left;  but,  the  girl  was  hungry.  she  didn’t  even  notice  that  she  still  had  flour  on  her  cheek  from  her  baking  this  morning,  all  she  could  think  about  was  what  she  wanted  for  dinner.  sure,  she  could  have  just  gotten  something  from  the  bakery,  but  in  all  honesty,  there  was  only  so  many  times  you  could  eat  baked  goods  before  you  want  something  else.  she  was  walking  along  the  sidewalk,  scrolling  through  all  the  places  to  eat  near  her,  not  paying  attention  to  the  world  around  her.  

[mccnlitsins]

there’s something mackenzie adores about just walking around, but their sense of direction can be described in a simple word: abysmal. there’s something about the streets, they all look the same and their distraction from seeing the beauty in everything meant it only took a turn and they would be totally lost. seeing a girl on her phone, they almost regretted the intrusion, but it was her or wandering around even more. “hi there- sorry, but uh- i was supposed to try this mexican place and now i have no idea what street i’m on-” they paused, looking at the other with a slight head tilt. “where are we?”

[mccnlitsins]

mancalledmxlice​:

He knew that Phineas was almost always looking out for him, but judging him for being a few minutes late? Damien pouted mockingly as he sank down leaned back in his seat. “I only made 2 excuses which was far less excuses than the last time I made any, just so you know!” He smirked and rolled his eyes as he turned his head to great the waitress who had hurried over. “Coffee for now, please. Maybe you’ll inspire me to stop making excuses! Isn’t that part of your job,” he joked. “I’ve been alright. Definitely better than before. How about you? Cause anyone any existential dread, lately?”

there’s a smile on his features, he looks at his brother and can’t help but always smile. they’re both horribly troubled, but there’s something comforting about the younger’s presence around Phineas. “far less than the last time... maybe in five years we’ll get you down to zero.” he laughed, looking as the waitress walked away again. “recovery is never a straight line, but i’m glad you’re on the better side of it... well, i haven’t caused it but there is this young girl afraid of her own shadow, which is rather complicated to deal with...” 

[mccnlitsins]

* ✶ 「 jeon jiwoo, 23, gender netural & they/them 」 welcome to the mortal realm, MACKENZIE CHOI — though, the fates whisper that they could only be MAKARIA reincarnated. it seems in this life they’re instead known for being a MORTICIAN. what a downgrade. nevertheless, mortality can be confusing, so it’s understandable they can be ASTUTE and KNOWLEDGEABLE, but also BLUNT and MORBID ; maybe that’s why they remind people of X by POPPY ? but not all history is washed away by time — just as the poets say, they still remind others of LONG FLOWING CLOTHES THAT RIPPLE IN THE WIND, OBITUARIES TO UNKNOWN SOULS, DAYDREAMING OF SOMETHING OTHER THAN THE INEVITABLE. hopefully this life treats them a little better.

living in the renovated haunted mansion always made mackenzie dream of something more, whatever came next. while their little sister hunted for the paranormal, mackenzie imagined what lead them to that point, what killed them, how they felt. as they grew up, they read about death a lot- nothing morbid, but they find it amazing how it manages to be the one thing that humanity can’t really understand. everything that once confused people eventually had an explanation, while death and it’s meaning eluded people. 

mackenzie fell in love with poetry, the art of remembering those that passed, collecting obituaries and photos of gravestones. they weren’t the best artist, keeping everything close to their chest, that it only seemed natural to go into mortuary science, the form of art that would never stand the test of time like a poem. it was fleeting, its beauty, but mackenzie found themself comfortable at the bottom of the hospital, the darkened corridors that seemed haunted to anyone else. 

minni seemed to want to find more, but mackenzie found themself in those small, dark rooms. death was inevitable, but mackenzie accepted that truth and warmed to it. they weren’t afraid, death was more like an old friend. 

anyone meeting them would find them rather morbid and unsettling, but that was mackenzie. living with ghosts and the dead all their life had made them comfortable with it, they knew it was the next chapter of life, and would help the transition for whoever rolled into their office a little easier. 

tldr: total edgelord poetry baby

reads the old classics a lot 

unashamedly big evanescence stan

similar to abby sciuto from ncis

[mancalledmxlice]

Damien tried his best to meet with his older brother as often as he could. Did he tend to want to meet up more often when he was feeling a little better? Who could blame him, honestly. He had every right to show off his mental stability to his brother. At least it seemed to give both of them some kind of peace of mind. He hated the winter, though. It was pretty clear to anyone that he wasn’t happy with the day he was having as he pulled the hat off of his head as he walked into the restaurant where he was supposed to be meeting his brother. He glanced around and spotted him at a table. “Before you say anything about me being late,” Damien started as he lowered himself onto the chair across from him, “I was dealing with a tough customer and I only had half of a coffee this morning so I’ll blame it on that.”

@mccnlitsins​

[mccnlitsins]

Phineas always wanted to look after his little brother, and if he could do that while also getting lunch? two birds one stone really, he could check in on Damien and make sure he was actually eating. Sitting at a table a little further back into the restaurant, Phineas only smiled weakly at Damien’s appearance - finally - taking a sip of the coffee sitting in front of him. “You know... you make a lot of excuses, surely one day it might inspire you to change your habits and actually come on time.” Phineas chuckled, shaking his head. “I hope you’ve been well.”

[mccnlitsins]

* ✶ 「 ben whishaw, 36, cismale & he/him 」 welcome to the mortal realm, PHINEAS BLACKWELL — though, the fates whisper that they could only be PHOBOS reincarnated. it seems in this life they’re instead known for being a THERAPIST. what a downgrade. nevertheless, mortality can be confusing, so it’s understandable they can be SOFT SPOKEN and STUDIOUS, but also INTENSE and JUDGEMENTAL ; maybe that’s why they remind people of OH NO!!! by GRANDSON ? but not all history is washed away by time — just as the poets say, they still remind others of EMPTY EYES STARING INTO YOUR SOUL, SCRIBLED NOTES IN OLD NOTEBOOKS, SHADOWY FIGURES IN THE CORNER OF YOUR EYE. hopefully this life treats them a little better.

the older of the blackwell brothers, phineas wasn’t as rebellious as his younger brother, but always wanted to be near him, keep him safe. they were always close, they trusted each other with their lives. he spent a lot of time watching the news, reading anything he could get his hands on, just trying to learn more about the world that surrounded him. phineas was smart, but there was something boring about just doing well in class and impressing his elders. the boy spent his time learning what he wanted, algebra and languages be damned. 

when damien talked about going into the military, phineas gladly followed, but because of the two years that separated them, phineas had just finished a degree in psychology before they enlisted and after basic training the brothers were split up. the army needed shrinks elsewhere, and phineas was shipped off to an overseas base. 

there was a constant sense of dread on the base, always waiting for the next fight, the next issue... the soldiers talked about their darkest fears, the things that weighed on their shoulders- phineas heard it all. notebooks filled of observations and experiences sat under his bed, always watching the people around him. 

tw death, violence it was a day where phineas was supposed to go out with his team, but his CO was expecting a report, so he was permitted to stay on base. thinking he was missing out, phineas dragged his feet on the report, wishing he was out there with his team, his army family. when they didn’t come back at the estimated time... he felt in his gut something was wrong. and IED went off under the truck and no one survived- phineas should have died that day, but didn’t. phineas spent most of his time looking after others and now had to fix himself, something that he’d rather bottle up and ignore. 

when damien and phineas left the army, they both knew something would never be the same, but the older found it easier to just move on and ignore it. he became a therapist, and sure the stories were less war based, but phineas found he was able to help just the same. he saw the ghosts of his unit every night, waiting for him to return to them, but he would shove it down and ignore it during the day- it was easier to fix others than fix himself. 

tldr: he is a MESS

very intelligent but also rather quiet, generally likes to watch people

reindeers- animals are better than people. 

has every member of his units names tattooed on his ribs

doesn’t sleep much and LIVES off coffee

not the best therapist tbh, kinda instills existential fears in people.

[miingyu]

jiwoo | red moon concept video

[aiyuji]

[eyres]

Ben Whishaw as Norman Scott in A Very English Scandal (2018), S01E01

[birthofvcnus]

GRAVEYARD by Halsey + visuals

“It’s funny how the warning signs can feel like they’re butterflies”