shit crazy rich wizards say

[misheardmagic]

Tyler: Morning! Minah: … Tyler: She is definitely warming up to me.

[misheardmagic]

Tyler: That was my mother. Daniel: Is she still mad about the cake? Tyler: My mother doesn’t do mad. She does disappointed. Fewer wrinkles.

[misheardmagic]

Jane: Don’t freak out. They ran out of [champagne]. Minah: Who the hell runs out of [champagne]?

[misheardmagic]

Tara: Mark, I love you but we got to talk about this packing situation. Mark: What? I think my system is just fine. Tara: Putting everything into your suitcase the night before we leave is not a system

[misheardmagic]

Tara: I didn't know you two were dating

Tyler: We're not?

Daniel: Cuddling while naked is just what good friends do

[misheardmagic]

Daniel: I was raised to be charming not sincere

[misheardmagic]

Tara: What the fuck is wrong with you?

Tyler: Wow, you could start with a “good morning.”

Tara: Good morning! What the fuck is wrong with you?

[misheardmagic]

Minah *drunk out her mind and clutching onto Sungjae’s face tightly*: You! You, you, you! I love you SOOOOO much sometimes I just want to throw you off a-a-a BRIDGE a TALL BRIDGE because you make my heart hurt ssssOOOOO much!!

Sungjae *extremely worried and confused*: I worry for my life because I know you can and would throw me off a bridge, yet at the same time I'm strangely flattered.

[misheardmagic]

Minah: Wanna come early for lunch? Maybe a quickie?

Sungjae: Its pronounce quiche

[misheardmagic]

M: I’ve got a date with Jane! How do I look?

Sungjae: with your eyes, M.

M: this is not the time for your bullshit.

[misheardmagic]

Sungjae *very drunk*: *points to Minah* That's my girlfriend, suckers!

M *quietly*: Your wife, Sungjae.

Sungjae: my wiFE! EVEN BETTER!

[misheardmagic]

Suho: That’s it. I’m done with this. I am going to rule over her with an iron fist.

Emma: Suho?

Suho: [sweetly] Yes, pumpkin?

[misheardmagic]

Minah: Where have you been?

Sungjae: *coming back from a meeting with Tyler and Suho* Emotional hell.

[misheardmagic]

Jane: *yawns*

M: *trying to flirt* I suppose being so pretty must be tiring…

Jane: uhm, so you must be exhausted.

M: *blushes*

Jane: *grins*

Sungjae: oh, really, guys? Really? RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY SALAD?

[misheardmagic]

Sungjae: I’m really not into those lovey-dovey, PDA, super-attached couples. I mean, I get it, your girlfriend is cool. Whatever.

Also Sungjae [with Minah]: EVERYONE LOOK AT MY BEAUTIFUL AND BADASS WIFE! I’M SO LUCKY TO HAVE HER AND I LOVE HER MORE THAN LIFE! SHE HAS A FACE AND OPINIONS!

[misheardmagic]

Sungjae: Before we go, just get it out.

Minah: What?

Sungjae: What you've been dying to say about my outfit.

Minah: Oh, just tell me what you want me to criticize and I'll do it. I just want you to be happy.

[misheardmagic]

Minah: [to Tyler] Sorry you confused "playing hard to get" with my genuine disinterest.