Alexander Molokov-de Courcey

Former chess second. Retired.

[problempuppy]

i could be the most incompetent attack dog youve ever seen

[soppingwetratboy]

Being told what to do is great because then you know what to do

[movingpawns]

that's okay.. it doesn’t make it bad

I don’t know.

[movingpawns]

well yeah that’s true. but there’s a difference between like insulting people and just being vulnerable sometimes

It’s not how I am used to being.

[movingpawns]

elaborate on that

You can’t just act however you like and assume people will still want to be around you.

[movingpawns]

people don't love you because you've done enough things to "deserve" it

That’s not entirely true.

[movingpawns]

no? why would it be

That’s how the world works.

[movingpawns]

you understand it's not really about "deserving" it right

Isn’t it?

[movingpawns]

oh....... :(

Don’t frown at me.

[movingpawns]

like it's uncomfortable to be that vulnerable?

And I feel like I don't deserve it.

[movingpawns]

i understand that..

Do you?

[movingpawns]

even if it's caring attention

It makes me uncomfortable.

[movingpawns]

like it should be private?

The attention makes me feel bad.

[movingpawns]

why

I feel weird if people know.

[movingpawns]

is it?

Yes.

[movingpawns]

yeah you do tend to do that

Yes, well, it’s best to deal with things alone sometimes.

[movingpawns]

did your therapist agree that they were good ways to deal with it

Mostly. She could do without the smoking or hiding away in the house.