The Strange Musings Of Professional Head-Whackers

  Interesting thoughts from the Griffin Fechtschule HEMA Club at the College of William and Mary  

[overheard-at-hema-practice]

I think that you all seriously underestimate how much of this system is reconstructed from dudes’ diaries describing how they cut off their neighbors’ ears

[overheard-at-hema-practice]

I was trying to say fechtshule, but instead I said fichtshule

[overheard-at-hema-practice]

*Vigorous Sport Fencing Argument about Flunge vs Flèche between an epeeist and a saberist ensues*

[overheard-at-hema-practice]

If you die of ankle strain on the battlefield, your bloodline was meant to end

[overheard-at-hema-practice]

Swedish Sabre is the IPA of swords: lots of hops

[overheard-at-hema-practice]

“It’s alright officer, they’re soft, we’ll let you know when they’re hard.”

[overheard-at-hema-practice]

You have the ideal surface area to volume ratio for baking bread

[overheard-at-hema-practice]

Zwerch-copter is the roflcopter of HEMA

[overheard-at-hema-practice]

Fighting in the mud might be historically accurate, but so is dysentery

[overheard-at-hema-practice]

He’s trying to show off his slutty, slutty calves

[overheard-at-hema-practice]

If I see someone throw a cut six out of a moliné from Saint George I will throw an object at you, I just haven’t chosen the object yet

[overheard-at-hema-practice]

Unfortunately this is a British system, we are not allowed to have fun

[overheard-at-hema-practice]

These are some drills and exercises you can do for fun, and maybe even profit

[overheard-at-hema-practice]

You might look at this diagram and say [instructor], are we trying to summon a demon? Yes. And the demon we are trying to summon is cuts.

[overheard-at-hema-practice]

A passing step is how you’d walk in real life, but crouched down and to the tune of the Pink Panther

[overheard-at-hema-practice]

Do you have any glaring questions?

No, but I’d like to glare at you!

[overheard-at-hema-practice]

Guten tag you

Guten STAB YOU!