Dear toxic lover
So what, you’ve been calling me for months without response. You’ve left countless voice messages and miss the sound of my voice. Am I supposed to be ashamed for keeping my distance ? Am I supposed to come to the very same senses you tried stripping away from me and call you back?
So what, you want me to tattoo your name on my skin some more? Aren’t the ones that have come to blacken enough ? Time has taught me to love myself with them although they’re reminders of you. I kiss each one before I go to sleep with a breath of ‘never ever again’
So what, you still want me to lose a few kilograms ? You always had a disgusting distaste for how my body was made of folds. You used to knock on my door every five minutes to make sure I was still tucked away in bed and unfed. You choked me whenever anything moved down my throat and this time, I’ve chosen to spit you out.
So what, you heard ive been having joyous conversations with my friends and your ego is bruised ? You loved to whisper into my ear as I slept that they would never love me the way you did. They would never stay as long as you would. They would stop loving me as soon as they found out i was with you. Your words always replayed in my mind in their presence and i found it hard to smile. Now i sleep with my ears clogged and explain to them why we came to be.
So guess what, I’m working on leaving you completely in my past. You’ve been unhealthy for my heart and I’ve come to appreciate the way it beats. I’m unlearning all the songs you taught me about death and unworthiness. I bite into my pizza topless while staring at myself in the mirror saying 'calories, my body. My body,calories’ . I laugh uncontrollably with my head thrown back and a tear in the corner of my eye. Ive found love outside of you and what a love worth waiting for.
snowghoul
ellievsbear
pixelskylines
blakekathryn
tangentwithtanner
theartofmadeline
yousharknotpass
gummygunk
gracieabrams
