does she know that we bleed the same?

In a sick way I want to thank you for holding my head up late at night; while I was busy waging wars on myself, you were trying to stop the fight. You never doubted my warped opinions on things like suicidal hate.You made me compliment myself when it was way too hard to take. So I'll drive so fucking far away that I never cross your mind, and do whatever it takes in your heart to leave me behind.

[redpalms-blog1]

.

[redpalms-blog1]

evie. 

Evie had seen doppelgangers before, certain people of e.scape being so of people she knew back in Wiltshire. But this wasn’t the coded world her father created for her. Eyes widening ever so slightly as she cleared her throat. “Evie.” Her voice was timid, not being able to get over the fact she was basically looking into a mirror. “Who are you?”

it’s painfully clear that the other girl is uncomfortable with the situation, so alicia forces herself to calm down. she’s not here to hurt anyone, she just wants some answers. “ evie. okay. i’m alicia. ” she replies, offering a half-smile. “ where are you from ?? ”

[redpalms-blog1]

jake. 

Jake never really talked about his mother. Not only because he didn’t have anyone to talk to, but also because he didn’t want to bring it up. He couldn’t talk to Troy about her, knowing the kind of mother he had, much less with his father who would get angry at even the mention of her. So he was left with keeping it to himself, remembering her in thought. When Alicia asked about her, he couldn’t help but smile. Memories came, happy memories from when he was a kid and she was still alive. “She was the best person I knew. She was caring, loving, always looking after me. She was always making sure that everyone around us was happy, that they had everything they needed.” He paused. “She was a really good person, Alicia, I think you would’ve liked her. And she would’ve liked you.”

a warmth spreads throughout alicia as jake speaks about his mother, briefly wondering how someone so KIND had ended up with someone as miserable & cruel as jeremiah otto. then again, perhaps the old man hadn’t always been that way. “ she sounds WONDERFUL. ” much sweeter than anyone alicia has met so far, “ it seems as though her kindness lived on through you. ” it didn’t take a genius to figure that out. jake’s family could be cold & distant. it had always left alicia wondering where jake had been taught to be soft & caring. “ i think you’re right about that. about me liking her, i mean. --- and for the record, i think travis, had he made it to the ranch, would’ve like you. ”

[redpalms-blog1]

nick.

It would drive Nick MAD never being able to figure out or even come up with a theory of what’s going on. Maybe, just maybe he would be able to live not figuring out this one ‘little’ thing. It seemed like Alicia was doing completely fine, ❛ There has GOT to be an explanation, ❜ his gaze shooting towards his sister; the gesture making him feel a little bit more at easem ❛ EVENTUALLY, yes I will… Wait —- Mom’s here? ❜

“ well, let me know if you ever find it, ‘cause i’ve come up with nothing so far. ” not that she’s really been seeking one out, but that fact feels irrelevant to their conversation. “ yeah. somewhere. haven’t seen her in a few days, but i figure she’s off tearing the city apart from the inside. ” 

[redpalms-blog1]

troy. 

“I think we both know what I’m easily capable of, I wouldn’t be so sure.”

alicia is silent for a moment, green eyes focused on troy. it’s not the first time they’ve butted heads & she’s sure it won’t be the last. “ you don’t SCARE me, troy. ” she announces after a moment, frown pulling at pink lips. “ and if you ever touched me, you know my mother and brother would have your head. not really something you want to be risking, is it ?? ”

[redpalms-blog1]

i have all of my replies drafted, but i’m honestly just so fucking miserable tonight & it’s making it hard to concentrate, so things will be replied to & posted later tonight/tomorrow. <33

[redpalms-blog1]

evie. 

Being born and raised in a county like Wiltshire made New York look like a massive maze to Evie. Never once stepping foot in America before, let alone the city that never sleeps. It was new and exciting but she couldn’t help but feel small. Hands on either side of the mug that contained tea, she let her gaze fall upon the person beside her before shyly speaking up. “So, what can one do in New York besides getting lost?”

all alicia can do is STARE, shock washing over her as she pinpoints the eerily familiar facial features of the other. they’re spitting images of each other & alicia kind of HATES it. “ i ... --- uhhh. who are you ?? ”

[rawrmeansmemes]

THE MEME FOR PEOPLE WHO LOVE HAPPINESS

inspired by this awesome meme right here that I wanted an opposite for. send a  💝  and I’ll generate a number, 1-75, and post a starter based on what scenario I get.

Keep reading

[redpalms-blog1]

.

[byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-e-d]

[redpalms-blog1]

jake. 

Jake couldn’t help the chuckle that left his mouth. “We do, don’t we? And I have to say that we look like a really hot couple.” 

her own laughter follows his, the comment amusing alicia to no end. “ you know, i think we might be BIASED, but i’m inclined to agree !! we are pretty easy on the eyes. ”

[redpalms-blog1]

nick. 

❛ OF COURSE you do… —- I get that I’ve fucked up plenty of times in the past, but once? Is fucking up once really that BAD? God, I don’t expect you, nor do I WANT you to baby me again. ❜

“ okay. ” she pauses, letting out a SHAKY breath. she’s being UNFAIR, letting her anger blind her. she wants to be BETTER than that. “ i’m SORRY. i just ... -- i want things to work out for you here. i want you to be HAPPY. ” 

[redpalms-blog1]

troy. 

“I may push you away but I know what I want when it comes down to you, Alicia. Can you say the same about me?”

“ i don’t know what i want. i just ... -- i need TIME. this is too much right now. ”

[redpalms-blog1]

troy. 

As much as every word did in fact help Troy understand, he couldn’t help but cringe at how much of a sap the whole thing sounded. Yet there he was, terrified with that exact feeling she explained when it came to his chest. He didn’t appreciate how much Haley talked but after their first kiss he let her ramble on anyway. And ever since they’ve spent as much time as they possibly could together. Everything Alicia said made sense. Whoever he began to care for always became more important. Not to mention everyone back at the ranch as he was their protector. He didn’t know how he felt towards falling as all he was was petrified that he’d get hurt. “I know I’m usually a risk taker but this is different.” His heart would be on the line for the first time and he afraid what he’d do if rejection happened. His anger was uncontrollable along with the hurt. Added extra now would be dangerous. “My heart has been through enough disappointment and damage.” The last time wouldn’t be the last and he knew it but he didn’t feel he had the strength to put himself in that situation on purpose. “I like her, okay, I do. I just don’t know what to do about it. What if the feeling isn’t mutual? What if she deserves better than this?” At this point Troy knew he was making excuses but they both knew what he was like. He was slightly surprised Alicia was being supportive instead of warning the girl he liked.

it’s fucking cheesy, alicia knows, but it’s the only PROPER way to describe how it felt to fall in love. “ you could always TELL her. ” she suggests, shoulders rising into a lazy shrug. she had been the first to say the L word between her & jake; she had been terrified, of course, but it had paid off in the end when he said it back. then again, alicia doesn’t know this girl troy is talking about, which makes things more RISKY. “ LISTEN, you’re a jerk and sometimes i wanna kick your head off your shoulders, but you can actually be SWEET. kind and caring as well, so there’s nothing to worry about. just go for it. if it doesn’t work out, then oh well !! you’ll find someone new. if it does work out, then great !! ”

[redpalms-blog1]

nick. 

❛ SURE —- I fuck up ONCE, just once here, and you can’t handle it ? Really shows how much you care. ❜

“ do i not have the right to be UPSET ? to withdrawal from the situation ? this our SECOND CHANCE and i’m not spending it BABYING you again. ”

[redpalms-blog1]

jake. 

Jake didn’t want to be thinking about this now, he didn’t want to let his thoughts consume him. All he wanted was to enjoy this moment the best he could. Jake pulled away as well, his eyes locked with her’s. “I was scared, of leaving you there. I wanted to be the one who stayed, I didn’t want to put you in danger by leaving you there. I knew Walker would keep his word and not hurt you, but I was still afraid. I wanted to solve things as quickly as possible, so I could get you back.” Jake shook his head. “You won’t lose me, I promise you that. But I can’t lose you either.”

“ i know. ” it’s a conversation they’ve had many times, always trying to figure out if she had really been in any DANGER while in walker’s company. truthfully, she probably had been with how things were playing out, but if jake was willing to trust the man, then so was alicia. she would always take his word. “ --- but things worked out for us. we both got out ALIVE. this is our second chance to do BETTER. to be better. ”

[redpalms-blog1]

jake. 

Jake held her tightly against him, wishing he could do more to comfort her. He knew the kind of pain she was going through how it felt. It wasn’t easy but at least they had each other. They couldn’t let themselves get consumed by their thoughts or they will go crazy. “I know it’s not, trust me. I lost my father now and it’s true that I miss him … but I can’t help but wish my mother was here instead. Maybe that makes me a horrible person but it’s the true. You would’ve liked her, she was so sweet and caring.” He said with a small smile. “It’s the same with me, you know? I’m not leaving, I’ll stay by your side until you get tired of me.”

the mention of his mother automatically captures her attention. she’s always been slightly CURIOUS, but was never able to find the time to ask about her. according to troy, she was exactly how jake described her --- sweet & caring, which is hardly a surprise consider jake’s the same way. “ that doesn’t make you a horrible person, jake. you can’t help how you feel. ” she doesn’t want him to downplay his emotions, doesn’t want him to beat himself up over them. “ tell me about her --- your mother. i want to know all about her. ”