loose excerpts from the 1994 hide personal interview in SHOXX (vol. 23)
original twitter thread (edited it a little bit so it's more comprehensible)
The context of the interview is hide's first solo album (Hide Your Face) and his sincerity and self-expression.
It starts with hide and the interviewer laughing about how hide is difficult to interview, and hide says that he often rereads his own interviews later and is like "goddamn, I wanted to convey a very clear idea, but this is ended up sounding so so incoherent, come on, you're smarter than this lol".
He says he tries really hard to be very genuine and wants to come across as honest, "even though it may seem hard to believe when I'm sitting here hidden under so much makeup lol".
Later hide starts talking about the difficulties with conveying the full extent of one's love for another, because even when you really love (ai愛) someone and they're your no.1, somehow all you can say is "I like-love you" (suki 好き). And before long it's not enough, you wanna express it better!
"When you love someone and you're choosing the right words to express it, you will usually settle for 'I like you', right? But that's not enough! If you told your beloved person 'It's not enough, but I like you!!', they would give you a weird look, wouldn't they lol"
Then he talks about how when you love someone, you try to open up and show them your real self, make your words easily understood. But isn't it kind of staged, as if you're "directing" yourself in order to be more likeable ...? "I wonder about that..."
The interviewer is like "How nice it would be, if we could fall in love just with eyes, lips and heartbreats, regardless of the meaning of words" and hide is like "I know right.......!"
[t/n: this part is hard to express, but the literal sentence is basically: "How nice would it be, if love/romance was possible through just eyes, lips - not in the meaning of words or voice - and chest, in the meaning of heartbeat...?" it's so awkward to translate but it's just about love transcending words]
interviewer: With all these things involved, it can get pretty confusing, right? Maybe it's not "50% 50%", but the mind and the body really are their own separate things lol
hide: Me too, even when I fall in love, I always wonder if I'm being selfish (laughs). After all, isn't everyone always saying "I want you to understand me"...? Isn't it the whole point, wanting to be understood? But, the true ideal is different in the end...
hide: It's kinda old-fashioned, stuff about red strings of fate and such... It's not exactly about that, but about being two matching puzzle pieces that come together and finally make one single piece, making you go "ah, it fits!" I want to have a love like that, I think.
I love Yoshiki's melodies, because that's the kind of feeling they evoke in me. I don't know which one of us is which part of the puzzle, but when Yoshiki first played the piano for me, it completed me, it matched whichever jigsaw puzzle I was. That's how I feel, always.
[t/n: this one was a bitch to translate cause he talks about jigsaw shapes, like, 凹 and 凸 , and i would be unable to take this seriously if i translated it as .. yeah. BUT YOU GET THE MEANING, one of them is the 凹 and the other is the 凸, and hide doesn't know who is who but the point is - they naturally fit.
so the context of what he says is that he yearns for a type of love that involves two people coming together like fitting puzzle pieces, so that together they form one part and complement each other, and then immediately says that's how he feels whenever yoshiki plays the piano]
hide: And that's the kind of feeling I long for. After all, I hate putting effort into romance (laughs)
hide: If two people once felt that way, then even if they break up after a year, I want to join their hands, like "No no, you guys weren't wrong in the beginning! Once everything that you did in that messy past is settled, won't you feel cleansed?" I think we should tell young people that.
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