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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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@sarasim
by Denny Bitte
Antoine Calbet - Ondines
Attention! (by Daniel Parent)
Paintings by Charmaine Olivia
Hamda Al Fahim Fall 2016 Collection
I don’t have any motivation.
Nothing.
I used to be very lucky in everything i did so I thought maybe i just got used to getting everything I want but
but even if i get pushed to the edge, even if I HAVE to do something
i keep doing nothing
or doing it but not trying, just so it will be, not caring for the outcome.
I should care
I want to care but I just can’t.
Friends make fun of me for that. Or maybe not fun, they look down on me?
I brush it off, laugh it off, whatever, and later feel the guilt - oh yeah, I could’v done better - but i didn’t. I never do.
I think I used to socialize more. I think but don’t remember clearly. Couple years ago I stopped and fallen into this weird black hole of days on a loop: wake up, not feeling like it, skipping school, spend day on the internet, go to sleep. Repeat.
I was a messy person, but I just stopped caring for my surroundings. I would run out of dishes to eat, and they would just stack up in the sink but i would do nothing about it.
I stopped caring for my looks. I used to put on make up daily and suddenly i i stopped.
I started to think I maybe have depression. I’v never tried to kill myself tho I thought about it, i brushed it off, I have a loving family and friends, its just my downs and ups are too much. I really can’t wake up in the morning, I really can’t do anything, ill make every excuse...
And I’m actually still wondering, after years. I just don’t know.
I’m so lost
I’m too old to be feeling like this
I just want motivation to live
There’s a theory going around that Seven knows that this is a game, but I think Jumin also knows that.
While playing Jaehee’s route, a chatroom with Jumin opens where he’s talking about a cherry farm. There is absolutely no mention of any games whatsoever. However, as Jumin says he should rest, he tells you “don’t play the game too late”. He uses the phrase “the game” meaning he’s talking about specific, even though time and time again I said that I don’t play games. Furthermore, it’s been underlined. And he’s saying “too late”, showing that he knows about the 3am chatrooms.
If we link this back to when Zen says that he had the dream about MC being a robot programmed to say things, but at the end of the dream they were actually robots, it sort of works. If the characters in the causal route are all robots, imaginary, that Seven created to fill his and Jumin’s lonely life, it would work. If you ever mention 4th wall breaking things to Seven and Jumin they don’t seem surprised. But if you break the 4th wall while conversing with Zen, Jaehee, or Yoosung they generally seem surprised. Zen even says “Don’t say things like that, you’re scaring me.” When you mention you’re using an app which only let’s you say programmed things. If you choose “I’m playing a visual novel which has more than two choices” in the chatroom with Seven and Jaehee, Seven doesn’t really react, he keeps going on about money. However, Jaehee says that she does not understand.
There are hints in the prologue that Seven knows it’s a game. When you choose “But I’m not a girl”, Seven says “thenwhydoyouplaythisgane”
It is entirely likely that Jumin and Seven got together to create this game, hoping that someone would play it. Of course that means that the visual novel scenes did not actually happen unless you are with Seven or Jumin, or maybe still, none of them happen. It is mimicking reality. Even if you play the visual novel mode, you are not actually there. If the characters were programmed, the visual novels are just something to keep you interested in the game so you don’t leave Jumin and Seven. It’s as if Jumin and Seven are Cheritz themselves, the only real ones, making you addicted to the game do you don’t leave.
This also means that the reset theory fits in. Only Seven and Jumin know that the game resets, but since they know that the game will keep resetting until you try out all of the routes, they are okay with it. This is probably also why Jumin and Seven’s routes are in the Deep Story. It costs 80 hourglasses to unlock and is a lot more plot heavy. The Deep Story is pricy because they want you to keep playing.
But that’s just a theory. A ga– okay yeah sorry it was long, I just wanted to add a new theory to this!!
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