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if it's done in love, it is done well

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The Gap

Natalie Keener: I thought I'd be engaged by now. I thought by 23, I'd be married, maybe have a kid, corner office by day, entertaining at night. I was supposed to be driving a Grand Cherokee by now. Alex Goran: Well, life can underwhelm you that way. Natalie Keener: Where did you think you'd be by err...? Alex Goran: It doesn't work that way. At a certain point, you stop with the dead lines. It can be a little counter productive. Natalie Keener: I don't want to say anything that is anti feminist. I really appreciate everything that your generation did for me. Alex Goran: It was our pleasure. Natalie Keener: Sometimes it feels like, no matter how much success I have, it's not gonna matter until I find the right guy. I could have made it work, he really fit the bill, you know. Ryan Bingham: Fit the bill? Natalie Keener: White collar, 6'1, college grad, loves dogs, likes funny movies, brown hair, kind eyes, works in finance but is outdoorsy. I always imagined he'd have a single syllable name like Matt or John or Dave. In a perfect world, he drives a 4 runner and the only thing he loves more than me is his golden lab. And a nice smile. What about you? Alex Goran: You know, honestly by the time you're 34, all the physical requirements just go out the window. You secretly pray that he'll be taller than you, not an asshole would be nice just someone who enjoys my company, comes from a good family. You don't think about that when you're younger. Someone who wants kids, likes kids. Healthy enough to play with his kids. Please let him earn more money than I do, you might not understand that now but believe me, you will one day otherwise that's a recipe for disaster. And hopefully, some hair on his head. I mean, that's not even a deal breaker these days. A nice smile. Yea, a nice smile just might do it. Natalie Keener: Wow. That was depressing.

RATM

I've gone raging against the machines again. I often do this and it has become a healthy habit, unplugging from the noise of the world...wide web that is. The first quarter has been consumed and I leave all the crumbs behind as I bus out. Most people have gone to the beach but I chose to continue working during the holidays and sprint to the 19th and then fly off to paradise on the 20th. New year is looming! I designated May 1 as my new year and Easter as my Christmas eversince I could remember. I've inverted my season along with my map. Yes, I use an inverted map. It is to remind me that Time is not what we think it is, and so is Space. North is not necessarily UP, and south is not necessarily down. I'm planning how to end my year over my 3rd cup of coffee. I have decided to make the succeeding days special. Though most days are mundane and some are hectic, each day is special. It must be. I bought an adorable pocket sized planner with pink synthetic cover for half the price and a really cheap pink mechanical pencil. I am excited to fill each day with a lil sumthin' sumthin. Okay... Back to writing. <3

Bridges

After spending time with friends a few weeks ago, I realized how important it is to constantly reinforce "bridges" of friendships for it to stand the tests and challenges of time. Bridges connect two points separated by distance, which means we may be 2 different individuals who agree to build on commonalities rather than remain distant because of differences. Also, bridges are two-way structures meaning there should be reciprocity (give and take). We cannot have it our way always. Sometimes we'll need to give-up to grow-up! Upon reading this verse, I realized that God was making a point when He allowed me to fall off the stairs last Saturday. It's His way of showing me how important relationships really are. "For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow." And for that, no "woe" came my way for a fellow has lifted me up. Thank You! "Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken." Ecc 4:9-12 Just want to say that I appreciate the ones we have now and that I am thankful for each and everyone of you. May Jesus be our bridge keeper! The 1st person in our friendship! That makes you the 2nd and I the 3rd. :)

OVERWHELMED We now know that Pluto is not a planet, that Higgs boson exists, that Scientists in Germany have succeeded in stopping LIGHT for a whole minute - the fastest thing known to us is no longer constant. My problems always seem to get pettier and pettier (not prettier) when I try to ponder on the immensity of the visible universe. For that matter, things like hate, jealousy, poverty, and corruption become laughably irrelevant as my personal views expands. If you're still not convinced that this representation of space proves the idiocy of thinking we know what's what, read this: Quote from the narration: There are over 100 billion galaxies in the universe, simply saying that number doesn't really mean much to us because it doesn't provide any context. Our brains have no way to accurately put that at any meaningful perspective. When we look at this image however, and think about the context of how it was made and really understand what it means, we instantly gain that perspective and cannot help but be forever changed by it. - Tony Darnell This video gives a deeper meaning to Psalm 8: 4-6 : "What is man that you are mindful of him, the son of man that you care for him? You made him a little lower than the heavenly beings and crowned him with glory and honor. You made him ruler over the works of your hands; you put everything under his feet." and the whole Psalm 139. "...How precious to me are your thoughts, God! How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand—when I awake, I am still with you." Overwhelmed. Praying that I may get so lost in the Love of Jesus and marvel again at the beauty of His Holiness. For His stubborn Love to override our stubbornness . "Create in me a pure heart and renew a steadfast spirit within me..." Psalm 51 This wallflower once again is shedding off her leaves, declaring, "Yes, I am ready to take this dance my King." I don't know where this Divine Dance is taking me but I trust every spin and every twirl He initiates. He will not let me fall. I thank Him for using science to show me how much we are loved and how Big He really IS.

As all things are filled with my soul You emerge from the things Filled with my soul You are like my soul A butterfly of dream And you are like the word: Melancholy

I like for you to be still —Il Postino, Pablo Neruda

Late Night Hour

(yes I'm cheezy like that) By: Maan Villanueva I've been waiting and waiting and waiting The clock awaits with me With every tic and every toc I swirl in a dizzying dance With excitement My heart beats like the sound of a bass drum Yours faint like the snare It fades in and out The sun arose and clothed The day with warmth I asked "oh, are you really there?" My questioning grew When the shade left me with The sun's scorching "Are you really coming?" I asked once more But the sun grew tired and decides to rest He then sends the moon And along with the clock we all await your arrival Until the late night hour Despite my weary heart I uttered a little prayer Hoping the heavens would hear But before I could say my 'amen' I turned with hope and looked By faith There you are Standing, smiling Panting and almost in tears Singing the most wonderful Melodic words I could ever hear You said "yes, I am here"

"...after being locked up in a tower for centuries, here I am finally opening the rustic door, full of hope ...then halfway through ... Kablag! it gets slammed onto my face. Hahahahaha"

The Ugly Truth x God's Sense of Humor

My One and Only Love

Spiritual Gifts Test.

MUSING LAZILY ON LOVE PONDERING YOU

(Another old blog. I wrote this last August 13, 2011) I searched the word Manipulation in the dictionary and was stunned. Here’s a snippet. *drumroll* • • • Handle or Control • • • Alter or Edit • • • Control or influence a person or a situation cleverly, unfairly, or unscrupulously • • • Alter (data) or present (statistics) so as to mislead • • • From the Latin word manipulus “handful” Wow. I’m pretty sure we all have, at some point, been guilty of this. There are, if I may use the Latin meaning, a “handful” of stories in the bible where people have done this both discreetly and blatantly. To name a few there’s Haman, Saul, the Serpent and the infamous Jezebel. Yes, a woman! Who mastered this art and sadly influencing today’s women and worse men. (To my Row Four friends, that would be Zuma and Galema for you haha) What’s sad about it is that they themselves are actually victims of their own schemes. They didn’t just short-changed what could have been theirs, but they were obviously outside the boundaries of God’s Will (good, pleasing and perfect). How? Let us compare both thoughts. Manipulation alters, edits, misleads. Whereas, God’s Will is natural (root word nature, God-made) original and true. Manipulation is Artificial, Man-made. Natural is God-made, Organic! (woohoo pinoyorganics.com!) A tree, for example, is “nature”. When it is altered into something else it then becomes artificial right? Same thing with our circumstance. When we do things our own way, and base it on our own time. When it depends on us, then we are not allowing nature to take its course. God wants us to abide in Him and He wants us to know His will because He is Sovereign. I guess, that’s why it is called GRACE. When it is forced then it is an oxymoron. Abiding is Grace. Resting in God’s flow. (John 15:7) Well, GOOD NEWS! God’s desire for you is to REST because He loves you. Cast your cares unto the Lord. If there is a legit venue to be lazy this is it, you don’t have to work for it, you don’t have to earn it. This led me to not want to earn my future husband and him to earn me back. Why? Because you spend what you earn. (Prov 18:22 note the word “favor”) I don’t know about you, but I sure don’t like the idea of being SPENT! We sure are GOD’S PRECIOUS GIFTS to each other. (James 1:17) ♭♬♯♩…musing lazily on love pondering you…♭♬♯♩ Manipulation is WORK and its product is EARNED only to be SPENT and it is FLEETING. Grace is REST and since it means “no work”, ergo, nothing’s earned. What is it then? A GIFT! Unmerited favor. To be ENJOYED for ETERNITY. (so no one can boast fralalalala….) This is to remind myself of the BEAUTIFUL EXCHANGE that happened in the Ancient Days. It is enough reason to believe that His heart is Good. Enough reason for us to trust Him and His timing. He sacrificed His Only Beloved Son not just so you could go to heaven, but also for you to not strive anymore (2 John 4:10; John 10:10). He did say “It is finished!” What was finished? Our striving to achieve what we couldn’t. So, let us not give in to fear and doubt. And how do we know God’s Will? Faith! Faith and only Faith. (Mark 11:24; Heb 11:11) The more we abide the more we will know. Also, we don’t have to know everything. We just have to know the One who does and He happens to love us. Be in a relationship with the King, the Maker, the Master Planner, the Promise Keeper and He will tell you what you need to know. (John 15:7) Now within the context of LOVE… Since apart from this we are nothing and will gain nothing (1 Cor 13). Abiding means to be intimate with Love. And Love is…(riiiiiight)… I can imagine you reciting 1 Cor. 13 in your head haha. So, Did you find a word there that resembles manipulation? Me neither. Ah! Love! That’s our God! Our Father! The Gift Giver! LOVE PERSONIFIED! Here's what True Love is. "This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins." -1 John 4:10 Now, I want the “new covenant” kind of romance. Graced. Overflow. ♭♬♯♩…when it’s time to walk that way we wanna walk it well. I’ll be waiting for you baby…♭♬♯♩ *music fades out*

God won't pull a Macgver on us. Jesus says "look, I am making all things new!" (Rev 21) He does not say "I am making all new things" He means that the things that have been so badly broken will be restored and then some... Jesus didn't handout crutches to heal the disabled. ALL THINGS NEW.

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