sydney :)

i'm an english major and on three different meds for my brain

[willothewispwisteriadawn]

Sometimes I wonder if Francis’s suicide note is partially inspired by the Introductory Rites of a Catholic Mass or the Act of Contrition. Knowing Donna Tartt is a Catholic convert makes me feel like it could have been intentional even if it’s not worded the same. It has the same energy:

Francis’s note

Forgive me for all the things I did, but mostly for the ones that I did not.

Introductory Rite:

… I have sinned through my own fault in my thoughts and in my words, in what I have done and what I have failed to do…

Act of Contrition

My God, I am sorry for my sins with all my heart. In choosing to do wrong and failing to do good, I have sinned against you whom I should love above all things.

[camillamaecaulay]

graves grow no green that you can use.

gwendolyn brooks

[doubleca5t]

One time I was explaining to my dad how unfair it is that every big city has at least a couple gay bars but there are only like 20ish lesbian bars left in the country and he responded with "That's cause gay men have a good party culture. Lesbians don't have time to party, they're too busy debating the sociological implications of things and studying for postgrad degrees" and as much as I wanted to tell him he was out of line for that, as a lesbian who spends all her free time on Tumblr debating sociological implications and messaging other lesbians in discord servers where everyone has a PhD or masters for some reason I felt like I might not be the best person to make that argument

[overthemoonwithme]

how does someone cut out “give me back my girlhood, it was mine first, and I damn sure never would’ve danced with the devil, at nineteen, and the god’s honest truth is that the pain was heaven” for "karma is a cat"

[borderlinereminders]

It’s time to work on not breaking your own heart with the imagined scenarios and assumptions your brain comes up with about your loved ones.

[wholeheartedsuggestions]

some things to remember:

- you’re never truly alone or unloved

- progress takes time, recovery takes time, real change takes time, and that’s just fine

- your brain telling you you’re worthless at 1am does not make it true whatsoever

- loneliness, heartache, rejection, and grief all hurt but they are not forever no matter how much they feel everlasting

- you don’t have to change to fit someone’s ideal image of you

- no one is worth losing yourself over

- mixed emotions and anger and regret are all part of facing reality and coping

- people do not all love like you do

- you are more than your problems

- you’re going to make it through the hard times and get to enjoy better ones

[syd-sloth-socks]

“stay motivated,” he signs the email

he’s talking to bunch of high schoolers, i joke to myself, we’ve never been motivated a day in our lives.

hey guys, this draft was from the spring of 2020 (right after/around shit went down) and id like to now say that this particular teacher has now started saying "make good choices" and "stay strong out there" (alternately) as we leave the classroom

:)

[tylorswift-deactivated20250623]

NO AMOUNT OF FREEDOM GETS YOU CLEAN I STILL HAVE YOU ALL OVER ME

[syd-sloth-socks]

my days are just *im sad* *redacted*

[kafk-a]

Ocean Vuong, from Someday I’ll Love Ocean Vuong

[wholeheartedsuggestions]

you are loved. you’re making progress and you should really be proud of every little bit of it. things are going to be okay. like tomorrow. tomorrow can be better. stay safe, please.

- things i think you should hear

[syd-sloth-socks]

what im really scared of, like, truly, is that ill move to a big city or a suburban area and won't be happy there either. im scared ill constantly be stuck in this void of not feeling enough emotions about the place im in... i know im unhappy in this small town but what if im unhappy in a big one? am i just an unhappy person? what if i go to the witch on the corner and he tells me this is all ive ever got?

[peoplehood-deactivated20211003]

what are some of your favorite friendship quotes??

Arnold Lobel, Days With Frog and Toad

Hanya Yanagihara, A Little Life

Wendy Cope, The Orange

Frank O’Hara, To John Ashbery

Emily Brontë, Love and Friendship

Salman Toor, Reunion / Green Bar

Mary Oliver, What is the greatest gift?

Danez Smith, acknowledgments

[syd-sloth-socks]

having mother-based trauma is great bc im in tears over this mother and daughter doing the worst rendition of dont stop believing karaoke ive ever heard

[syd-sloth-socks]

hello to everyone that knows me from sapphic_sloth_socks on instagram... i hope to eventually be back on that platform, but right now is just not the time, i don't think. ive been contemplating making this post for a little bit... it's really not that big of a deal! im sorry for disappearing without an explanation, life just got to be a lot (my mental health both got a lot better and then plummeted, which feels weird to say bc i posted continuously throughout something i can only describe as "scarily close to a depressive episode"). but anyway, im alive and okay and i do miss you all, really, so i hope to be back in another month or two :)). all the best, sydney :)

[untilghosts-deactivated20211029]

“I sat with my anger long enough until she told me her real name was grief.”

— C.S. Lewis (via onlinecounsellingcollege)

[lets-throw-bacchanal]

Theo Decker was like “it’s gay to say goodbye to people I genuinely care about” and then went and fucked a guy.