the envelope
confusion. such a simple word that explained such a complex feeling. it was the only feeling yongguk had as he grasped onto hyun bin's words.
'nova wants you.'
what a plot twist.
instantly, yongguk raised his eyebrow and cocked his head to the side. this isn't what he expected. not at all. he felt caught off guard. he felt dumbfounded. like he was on that ashton kutcher show 'punk'd.'
of course, you can't always get what you expect and want, silly guk. that's not how life worked. even when you're a five year old little kid and you're at that one annoying kid from your class' birthday party and you get a vanilla cupcake when you wanted a chocolate cupcake, you're reminded of the common saying 'you get what you get and you don't get upset' by a parent. life was filled with surprises and disappointments of all sorts. and sometimes you're just gonna have to settle for that vanilla cupcake.
but this was a lot more important than getting the flavor he wanted. this was getting his dream company. the company that was the main reason for why yongguk joined this whole show in the first place. the company that was home to artists that yongguk secretly fanboyed over, worshipped, and had posters of that he would bow down and pray to in his free time. but thAT'S NOT IMPORTANT AND BESIDES THE POINT, SO WE'LL MOVE ON.
how could a company that focused so much on dancing and singing sign someone like yongguk? rappers were vital for groups to get by these days, of course, but for some reason none of that could click in the male's mind. he never considered the fact that other companies- who were not as focused on hip hop as trc- would ever be interested in his style. there was rap duo signed with nova that yongguk knew of, but they seemed to be irrelevant when compared to the other groups in the company.
he didn't know what he wanted anymore. he felt like he did, but he kept on having second thoughts.
yongguk saw what happened with jiho when he had rejected nova in the last season. he saw the backlash jiho got after that episode. this seemed like it was just a repeat of the exact same thing. an underground rapper who wanted to get into trc being offered a contract with nova and feeling like they should reject it. it was almost as if this whole thing was scripted. maybe it would happen again in six months during the next season finale. yongguk wasn't too sure if he'd be declining this offer yet. he wasn't too sure about anything. but he was sure that he looked like a fucking idiot because of the way he just stood there staring at hyun bin. he was frozen. completely frozen.
it had been a few seconds since the ceo had slid the envelope towards him and he still had not even touched it. after realizing how late his reaction was, he stepped forward and picked up the envelope. a ninety degree bow was given, "thank you for seeing potential in me, sir, i'll definitely consider it."
and he wasn't lying when those words came from his mouth. a lot of consideration was put into it. he spent the whole night just staring at that stupid envelope and thinking. ignoring calls and texts from anyone he knew, just so he could think some more. forgetting to eat, just to spend more time to weighing the pros and cons. he never felt like he had faced such a hard decision in his life. if he did take this opportunity, would he ever be able to be signed with trc? he wasn't sure.
maybe if he did a lot of hard work, tiger jk would notice his talent, and he'd be signed to the company of his dreams.
lots and lots of hard work.
or maybe he should just return that envelope back to the ceo and tell him that he appreciated the fact that the other saw potential in him.