#&jason

[elenafitzroy-blog]

& @jasonkrane

Elena had tried to keep her word, trying Jason’s availability first before she turned to her parents to look after James while she was at work. It took some getting used to, certainly a lot of patience when trying to get her parents to understand, but they had managed to fall into a somewhat decent routine in the past weeks. Work, as per usual, was taking a toll on her, this time physically. Though it was true she had brought home some papers to edit during the weekend, when Jason offered taking James with him the previous night, she was quick to agree not so much because it would allow her more time to get the job done but also because she could feel herself coming down with something. She wasn’t too far off either.

It was noon when she woke up that Sunday, the latest she had in what seemed like ages. Light was unforgivingly entering her room and yet it was the ring on her phone that managed to get her off the bed. Shit. The curse escaped her sounding more like a wince than an actual word, making a quick run to the bathroom to brush her teeth. Another ring, a text. Jason was on his way and she didn’t even bother changing from her PJs—an old, oversized NYU sweatshirt and shorts—, quickly knotting her hair up in a messy bun as she skipped downstairs to clean up as best she could. Piles of toys, laundry that needed to be folded and had been left on her sofa as she had decided to sleep halfway through that task the night before; half-empty coffee mugs on the table, used as paperweight. Her efforts to tidy up before the boys arrived were futile, reaching for the door, exhausted and defeated, the moment he heard the car pull up the driveway. She probably looked like a truck had ran over her, she felt like she could fry an egg on her forehead, too, but she straightened her back, lifted up her chin, and waved. Elena was used to pretending she had it all together. Jason. Her parents. Her brothers. Her colleagues. She’d like to keep it that way even if she felt like her entire world was falling apart. “How’d it go?” She called in greeting though clearing her throat after her raspy voice threatened to break her sentence, taking a step outside though not too far away from the door.

[elenafitzroy-blog]

& @jasonkrane

Elena was running late, not so much by choice but because James had taken her car keys and hid them somewhere no one knew where to find. Her mother wasn’t really much help, sipping on her peppermint tea and talking about something something her friend Ms. Connelly had told her earlier that day at the span. Elena couldn’t care less, trying to get James to help her find the keys if he could remember where he put them. She knew better than letting him play with them. “Come on, baby, let’s find mommy’s keys, okay? Or daddy is going to think mommy is standing him up and that’s not going to help our case... at all.” She whispered, and begged, following the two-year-old who perked up at the mention of daddy, as he suddenly sprung the set out from inside some school bus toy that made Elena smooch him all over before darting out of the door and practically speeding to The Cellar. It wasn’t the best of spots to meet, she thought, especially not for whatever kind of talk Jason wanted to have, but she wasn’t really planning on making it too long. She wasn’t sure she could handle it. 

It was awkward for a moment, after spotting the blond and making her way to him, not really knowing how to greet him at all anymore. A kiss on his cheek? Shake hands? Wave? How did they get to this, to yearning for a touch but also afraid it’d hurt at the same time? “I’m sorry I’m late.” If anything, the breathlessness in her tone could let him know she wasn’t lying. “Your son decided to play hide and seek with the keys.” Tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, Elena offered him a smile, a rather nervous one, taking off her green coat and hanging it on the backrest of the chair as she looked around the place before taking a seat. “I’m a bit overdressed, aren’t I?”

[elenafitzroy-blog]

You and I get so damn dysfunctional,

we stopped keeping score.

{ & @jasonkrane }

The press conference Elena had been covering was not as helpful or insightful as she had wished. If she was being honest, she had managed to compile more information the day before when she pretended to be a tourist by the park, taking close-up photographs of the crime scene from the other side of the wall, and having, if only for a few minutes, walked inside after Jason had pointed her in the direction of an unattended doorway. Most of her questions were dismissed with a ‘no comment’ or the lack of a concrete answer being justified with a ‘we’re still under investigation’. In her most humble opinion, they were doing a lousy job. That or they were withholding information from the press and the public. She wasn’t even assigned to this case in particular but Elena had decided to take it because she was convinced this was not a stand-alone case but part of a series of crimes she was trying to get to the bottom of.

It did take her longer than expected, hunger only worsening her mood, to drive all the way to North End. Maybe it was her own work frustrations making her feel tense, or this, parking on Jason’s driveway to pick up their son. Elena already knew what was going to happen, the toddler would throw a fit because he didn’t want to leave, Jason would throw a fit because he didn’t want James to leave. It didn’t help that, in two years, she still hadn’t been able to let old wounds fully heal, ensuing fights and recriminations from her part. “I see you, boys!” Still she tried, taking in a deep breath as she knocked on the front window looking in before walking to the door, the smile on her face not forced. Even if it hurt and angered her, knowing this wasn’t Jason’s first choice, seeing him and James together always made her heart skip a beat. It scared her, though, that her son would someday experience the same heartbreak she did when Jason realized this is not exactly what he wanted, stood up and left. “Sorry I didn’t call, I was on the phone with my editor while driving. Everything good?” 

[blackpigtails-blog]

@marksmuses

[The light is what hits her eyes first, blinding her as she scoots backwards. Her body still aches from the other day when she burnt his toast. (She didn’t mean to. She really didn’t mean to). I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry is all that runs through her head.]

                                                         J-Jason?

[It’s a gentle whisper, as she does her best to stand and be strong for him. Abigail keeps her head down as she swallows hard, the tears in her eyes. It’s been ingrained in her not to say sorry. But she wants to. For him.

                Everything changed for her once Gibbs died.

  Maybe this is how she was supposed to live her   life now. With Jason. She’d been warming up to   the idea recently. (She’d miss his soft touches   when he’d punish her). Part of her mind knows   that’s the mental conditioning talking. But there’s   a stronger part of herself that can’t help but flush   gently when he gets close to her. A strange flutter   in her heart when she feels his praises.]

Am I allowed to come out now? I didn’t mean to burn the toast. You know how bad I am with stuff like that.

                       But I want to learn. You know how much I like                        learning. If you.. let me. I can, you know, try again.