#- felix

[thearcanon]

performing — comic

more about how we got here. sorry if it kinda looks like shit my hobby tries to kill me constantly

[ranqai]

babe wake up radiomogai queueskip is happening

[four-teeny-babies]

hav seen a nic old doggo s m day is goin gooc :]]]]]]

[lustringsystem]

this is weird but sometimes it’s really hard for us to tell who’s fronting and we get worried that somehow it means we’re faking having osdd sorry if this doesn’t make sense

It makes perfect sense, "blur moments" (what we call them) are very normal, it's just apart of dissociation/depersonalization/derealization, all of these are merely symptoms of DID/OSDD, dont worry!

[thearcanon]

How come you guys use the term “core” despite it being outdated (and factually incorrect/inconsistent with how DID forms)? /genq

we've taken a huge break from social media (and system tumblr as a whole), so admittedly we kinda use terms flippantly and with our own definitions. we have used "core" to define one of alters for so long it just feels right, both to her and to us. we use it kinda as a nickname now, really.

we have had a long journey, and our frequent fronters have changed several times along the way. she is the only one who has remained constant, so we call her our "core" because she is the most knowledgeable about how we got here, and remembers most of our collective life in general.

thanks for askin!

[ranqai]

pokes. unsure if friend status but would you be up for making an "affected by anxiety disorder/anxiety" xsymbol term similar to astrosun[x]? : o no problem if not!

hello!! we have an anxiety [x]symbol planned at the moment yes :D

^ will be hopefully made/queued soon, i can tag you in it if you want :]

[thearcanon]

Mmmmm harasser anon back at it again!

What does switching feel like physically? Are there times you only know you’ve switched because of physical sensations? How do you differentiate between dissociation/switch headaches and regular degular headaches?

Sorry if this is too much but I’m nosy and you’ve invited me in like a vampire.

this post contains in depth descriptions of my experience with dissociation, a warning feels appropriate

(obligatory “we are just one system, everyones experience is different” comment)

response under cut vv

Ive already put my tablet up for the night so i unfortunately have no doodles for you, vampire anon, HOWEVER -

we experience a variety of switches. some are quick and unnoticeable, and some take their time. alot of the time, we may not even be aware we switched / be aware of who we are. describing it is hard, it feels like going from functioning normally to being frozen in place feeling confused, lost, or distant. our worst dissociative episodes tend to have phases i guess?

we start out with feelings of disconnection, brain fog, forgetting where we are / whats going on, to hearing repetitive thoughts (single words like hearing "what" over and over). this is common for us in really heavy dissociation (esp if multiple alters are switching in and out and are trying to communicate) and we usually lose feeling in our body (also due to how long we have been standing still). eventually, a new alter takes the reins and has enough awareness to try and ground us, however achieving this is a fight (and can cause us to dissociate more in some cases. dissociation causes our environment / body to look and feel distorted, so grounding ourselves can sometimes just freak us out more.)

the most physical part of it would be our muscles tensing, aching, and otherwise going numb due to lack of movement. we also experience extreme visual snow, vision blurring and flashing colors when dissociation is at its worst.

it feels like being thrown around underwater. you have no idea of which way is up, and you cant do anything except let the current throw you around. however, sometimes you get to the surface. you gasp for breath (and those in your orbit do the same) and all you can think is:

"whats going on"? then, you are dragged back underwater and are kinda helpless all over again.

we also tend to immediately forget these episodes as soon as the switch is done, or we take a long time to truly realize it actually happened. how long the episode was, what led up to it, and when it actually happened becomes very hard to recall.

^ this is the worst of it, but dissociation for us comes in many forms.

we dissociate on smaller levels, which leads to extreme brain fog, confusion, processing delays etc. this most often looks like losing our train of thought, forgetting whats going on, and a general sense of blurriness. this can last for days.

as for headaches, i dont have alot to say on that. we dont get alot of headaches, just a feeling of pressure if that makes sense? we get migraines from how our depersonalization impacts our vision (visual static sucks!!), but thats really it? rapid switching can sometimes cause a headache, but those are rare.

hope this helps, best of luck