Get Over It (Pt.2)
Then things change as I grow up. I am still afraid of the dark and height even though I choose not to show it. But you start to realize of how scary real life is, and you start to afraid for being rejected by society and fail to achieve successes in your life. Those fears are very profound and I believe that everyone has it, even though it is a sure thing that we all have it in different extent.
When I told my friend about this, he encouraged me to go to the wilderness and that’s exactly what I did. I was in the White mountains New Mexico for 3 days hike to one of the highest peak on that state. I am not that new to hiking activities so I thought it would be easy, but it certainly was not. As I went for the summit, my paranoia of height kicked in. I made a stop, a lot of times while tried to convince myself that nothing bad as falling (all of those wild imaginations I had) will be happened. That was one of the moment when I hate hiking so much to the point that I regret stepped on those trails even for a second. I keep on complaining to myself, of how hiking is very tiring and how I could fall and not going back in one piece, until the moment I stepped on the peak.
I was silenced by the beauty of 10,258 ft above the ground. So I sat on one of the rocks up there, and silenced my minds. In this era of information, it is very hard for you to find silence in your mind, and being there that time gave me exactly what I need. To sat in silence and let my deeper consciousness talked. During that moment I found that height wasn't that scary anymore, I began to understand that most of it came from my own imagination. All I have to do was to shut the unnecessary imaginations off and I am good to go. I also used that moment to inspect myself, the fear of being rejected and failing. The answer is easy, just keep on moving as the best version of yourself. The society will always say good and bad things about you, and there is no limit in measuring your success. For being success and approved by the community is an utopia in your mind, you are the one who made it yourself.
And from that moment on I fell in love with hiking and trying any new outdoor activities. Some people say that going to concert and cities are fun, but I’ll say that it wont offer you the peace of mind that the wild can offer you. It is very important that we slow the time during this era where everything moving so fast that we forget to enjoy simple things and evaluate ourselves. Then sit in silence, make peace with our fear and find our courage.