May 16, 2014
Twitter By Joshua Twitter is pretty great. I get to ask Kesha out on dates "oh hey I think Tom Hanks will like this and maybe even that one dude from Kiss" Where else can I talk to the kicker of The Jets and send him all these sweet threats "Hey Nick Folk! What no answer? Man alive I hope your mom gets cancer" I can follow Sinbad to Steve Austin and that one dude that bombed Boston I need to think of a great hashtag I don't want to look like a fucking #fag Only 140 characters? That's not enough space For me to tell Helen Hunt how much I hate her face OH MY! I just got retweeted by The Fly! (Jeff Goldblum) Ok now I got to go I just got blocked Cause I asked Barbara Walters to suck my cock #theend
