The three times she tried (and failed) to wish Saeran a happy birthday, and the one time she did. (Ray/Saeran × MC)
Author’s note: Reblog! Do not repost!
Happy birthday to my favourite flower prince...
The first time she tried was a few months after she and Saeyoung had rescued Saeran from Mint Eye. Saeyoung had headed out to stock up on some groceries, and she and the younger Choi twin were curled up at opposite ends of the sofa, watching a movie together. Or rather, Saeran was watching the movie while she stared listlessly at the screen, fidgeting with her phone as she debated with herself on whether or not to wish her counterpart a happy birthday. A part of her desperately wanted to break out the party poppers and throw him the birthday party he'd never gotten the chance to experience. But the (slightly) more sensible part of her knew that that wasn't really a good idea yet; after all they had just been through trying to free Saeran from Mint Eye, after all the trauma Saeran had dealt with for his entire life...holding a birthday party just didn't seem like such a good idea anymore. But alas, she was stubborn. She desperately wanted to let Saeran know that even if no one else did, she remembered his birthday. That he was important to her. That she cared about him.
Saeran must have noticed her inner turmoil, despite the fact that he usually remained oblivious to other people's emotions (or at least, if he did notice, he hardly ever responded). When she shot a sideways glance in his direction, she noticed that he was no longer sitting as far away from her as he could. He had shuffled over to sit closer to her. She held her breath as she watched him tentatively reach out and cover her hand with his own.
He did all this nonchalantly while he continued to watch the movie playing on screen with a bored look plastered across his face. But you had to be blind to miss the fact that his cheeks now matched the colour of his crimson locks.
---
The second time she tried, she was taking a walk in the garden with Ray. They had been chatting as they strolled leisurely, Ray taking the time to explain the meaning behind each flower they passed. It was a topic she found interesting too, and usually she'd be all ears...but her heart just wasn't into it today. Her gaze kept slipping from the flower Ray was gesturing at to the dark circles beneath his eyes, his pale complexion making them all the more prominent. Her heart ached for the young game developer. She was worried about him. Other 20 something year olds would be out celebrating their birthdays, while here Ray was -working overtime to get the game completed. She knew that if she questioned him he'd say that he didn't mind, but surely no one wanted to spend their birthday slaving the day away.
"...MC? MC, are you okay?"
She snapped back to reality at the sound of his voice. Judging from the concerned look on his face, she'd clearly been lost in her own thoughts for a while now.
"Are you feeling okay? Is the weather too chilly for you? Do you want my jacket?"
Being the gentleman that he was, he removed his jacket and draped it over her shoulders despite her protests that she was fine. Placing a hand on her lower back, he tried to steer her gently towards the direction of the Magenta building. "Come on...let's head back. I'll make you tea and some snacks...how does that sound?"
"W-Wait! Before we go back...I just wanted to...to..."
She trailed off, embarrassed and unsure of how to convey her feelings to him. As she was wracking her brain for what to say, her gaze fell upon the bright blossoms that formed a colourful backdrop behind him. A grin tugged at the corners of her lips as an idea formed in her mind.
She bent down to gather a handful of flowers before offering them to her companion. "Here...these are for you, Ray
Happy birthday."
Ray reached out to receive the flowers with wide eyes, a smile playing on his lips.
Azalea. Take care of yourself for me.
---
Third time's the charm, right? Or at least...that's what they say. When the 11th of June next rolled around, she was locked in her room, waiting for V to free her. The once charming room that Ray had oh so carefully prepared for her had turned into her prison cell, and Ray himself was gone, enslaved by a mysterious drug and the cruel mistress of this awful place.
She perched anxiously on the window seat and fiddled with her phone as she gazed longingly at the garden she'd explored with Ray just a couple of days ago. As her eyes scanned the beds of colourful flowers, she caught sight of a head of familiar white hair. Despite her current predicament, her heart skipped a beat. She knew that Ray was long gone, buried under layers of trauma, but she still couldn't help but long for his soft voice and gentle touch -what she wouldn't give for him to hold her in his arms and tell her that everything would be okay.
"...hello? Why the hell are you calling me?"
It was only when his voice interrupted her thoughts that she realised she'd called him unconsciously. She glanced out the window and spotted him squinting up at her from where he was standing in the garden. When she answers, her voice comes out as a whisper. "...I missed you."
He barks out a laugh. "You don't miss me. You miss that airheaded marshmallow boy. We both know you prefer him over me-"
"I don't prefer anyone over anyone." She interjected. Before he could start an argument with her, she carried on talking. "Ray once told me that you and him were the same person...that he's a part of you, and that you're a part of him.
Saeran, I know you're not particularly fond of Ray...but the both of you are more alike than you think. You're both scared of being hurt again...it's just that you guys deal with that fear differently. You take it out on everyone else, but Ray takes it out on himself."
Saeran had gone completely silent, but she ploughed on despite his lack of a response. "Saeran, I really don't think that you're a bad person. If you'd just let me help you, we could get out of here and-"
"SHUT UP!"
Her phone nearly slipped from her fingers when he suddenly yelled in her ear. She braced herself for him to continue shouting at her, but to her surprise, he simply hung up.
She watched his retreating form from her window seat as he stormed off deeper into the garden. Unable to see his face, she was unaware that his cheeks were streaked with tears.
---
Despite the fact that she wasn't a morning person, she made the effort to wake up earlier than she was usually willing to just so she could prepare breakfast in bed for Saeran. After all, today was a special day. She stood in the kitchen and hummed a pop song quietly under her breath as she rearranged an assortment of items on a tray.
Strawberry pancakes? (Recipe courtesy of Jumin.) Check. Freshly brewed pot of his favourite fruit tea? Check. Birthday card tucked under a small bundle of lily of the valley flowers? Check. Now all that was left to do was to wake up the birthday boy...
Nudging the door open with her foot, she entered their shared bedroom holding the tray. She balanced the tray somewhat precariously on the bedside table and noticed that her boyfriend was beginning to stir.
"...flower?" Saeran groggily pushed himself up into a sitting position with one hand as he used the other to rub the sleep from his eyes.
"Good morning, my love." She had to bite back a smile as she settled herself beside him on the edge of the bed. He was adorable when he was half asleep like this. Picking up the tray from the bedside table, she slid it onto his lap. "Happy birthday."
He tried to hide it, but she spotted the way his eyes lit up with happiness. "You remembered."
"Of course I did." she muttered, leaning in to peck him on the lips. "How could I forget? This is the first birthday of yours that we're celebrating together."
Being careful not to upset the tray, he leaned forward to return the kiss. "Thank you, my flower...you've made this the best birthday I've ever had."
I haven't written anything in a while...but I found this fic in my phone, so why not post it >.< @spicysarahcha this is for you...please enjoy a saeyoung fueled guilt trip
My beloved MC,
I have loved you for as long as I can remember.
"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine
you make me happy when skies are gray
you’ll never know dear, how much I love you,
please don’t take my sunshine away.
The other night dear, as I lay sleeping,
I dreamed I held you in my arms,
but when I woke dear, I was mistaken,
and I hung my head and cried."
Yoosung was one of the first few members you chose. It must have been hard on you in the beginning. Yoosung was still grieving for the cousin he had looked up to greatly, and you filled the hole she'd left in his heart. He had greatly cared about Rika, and when he looked at you he saw in you the same things he'd loved so much about her -a kind heart, a beautiful soul, and a passion to make the world a better place. He wanted so badly for you to be Rika.
Playing second fiddle to someone else isn't a pleasant experience. Others would have packed up their bags and walked away a long time ago. But you were so patient with him. You continued to treat him with kindness...and as the days passed, he began to realise that you weren't Rika. That you couldn't be Rika; you and Rika were two different people. You were your own unique person, and he began to love you...for you.
"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine
you make me happy when skies are gray
you’ll never know dear, how much I love you,
please don’t take my sunshine away.
I’ll always love you and make you happy
if you will only say the same
but if you leave me to love another
you’ll regret it all some day"
The young hier to C&R International was next. Of all the RFA members, I'd always thought that Jumin seemed to be one of the lonliest. Jihyun had Rika. Zen had his fellow actors. Yoosung had his university schoolmates. Sure, Jumin had Elly to spend his days with...but the company of an animal just isn't the same as the company of another human being.
You saw past Jumin's seemingly cold exterior and befriended the lonely soul residing within. You broke down his walls to bring colour to the world that he previously saw in shades of grey.
"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine
you make me happy, when skies are gray,
you’ll never know dear, how much I love you,
please don’t take my sunshine away.
You told me once dear you really loved me
that no one else could come between
but now you’ve left me and love another
you have shattered all my dreams."
Jihyun had always looked at Rika as if she were the sun. He basked in her warmth. He dedicated galleries to her beauty. Even when she'd scorched his retinas and left him reeling...he continued to love her. He would have given his life to ensure her happiness.
Jihyun...he is the most selfless person I know. He was my mentor. The father figure I always wanted but never had. He took care of me and my brother when we had no one else to turn to. For all of our young lives, we had only known darkness. He gave us a ray of hope.
He's given up so much for people who cared about him too little. He deserved better than to beg like a dog at the feet of someone who didn't appreciate him, and you saw that. You guided him through the darkness that had befallen him, and bit by bit...you helped him to see his worth again.
"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine
you make me happy, when skies are gray,
you’ll never know dear, how much I love you,
please don’t take my sunshine away."
Thank you for bringing happiness to the RFA. Thank you for taking care of all of us. No matter who you end up picking in the end, none of us will forget you. Your bright smile, your gentle touch, your kind heart...every little detail about you will forever be etched into our hearts. We are eternally grateful for the light you've brought into our lives.
Maybe it's a fool's dream to hope that you will come back to be by my side once more...but in the event that you do, know that I'll always be waiting for you at the space station.
Let it be known that from this day onwards, all the Saeyoung angst I write is dedicated to my mysme sister-in-law @spicysarahcha .
You're really gone, huh?
The personal knick-knacks that you usually leave scattered around Rika's apartment have vanished without a trace, you are no where to be found no matter how many security footages I look through, and every official record of your existence (your birth certificate, identification card, passport, etc.) has been wiped off the face of the planet. But while your absence hasn't left much of physical trace, I can't say the same about the impact you have left on our hearts. None of the other members seem to have retained any memories of you, but everyone's been behaving oddly.
Yoosung keeps whining in the chatroom about the abundance of leftovers in his fridge; he's recently been accidentally cooking two portions of food instead of one, for some reason forgetting that he only has to feed himself.
Zen's risk taking behaviours have made a comeback. Much to everyone's concern, he's back to spending his nights on his motorcycle; desperately chasing after something -or someone- that's slipped through his fingertips.
It's been a while since anyone has heard a single word of complaint from Jaehee about her never ending workload. She seems to prefer to bury her feelings under piles of paperwork, focusing on work in an attempt to ignore the feeling that something is missing.
Jumin mentioned the other day about discovering a blue floor length gown, trimmed with pearls and lace, hanging in a forgotten corner of his closet. He doesn't remember purchasing it, nor can he come up with a plausible reason of why he would own such an article of clothing in the first place.
And me? I try not to think about it. I try not to think about you. If I let even a single memory of you slip into the forefront of my mind, I know I will be left floundering in a sea of depression deeper and darker than any I have ever known. But sometimes, when I can ignore the siren's call no longer...I give in to the crashing waves. Sometimes...I wonder if you left us because of...me.
The image of your frown replays in my mind like a broken record, ingrained into my memories mind for the rest of eternity. I want to reach out and tease your frown back into a smile but try as I might, you remain out of reach. I'm painfully aware that my fingers will never carress your soft skin ever again; I will never again hear your cheerful voice call out "I'm home", never again see your lips curl into an affectionate smile created just for me.
Why did I push you away? Why did I let you go?
I should have thanked you for the endless plates of food you brought me instead of pushing them away and telling you not to bother. The only reason why I refused to eat was because of the anxiety churning in my stomach -anxiety caused by the thought your compromised safety. All I could think about was keeping you safe, I could care less about something as trivial as feeding myself. I meant it as a selfless gesture, but the only thing I managed to do was put pain in your eyes. You were the one that was truly selfless; trying to take care of me even with the threat of death hanging over your head.
I should have held you in my arms when I heard you crying alone in your room. I should have tried to comfort you, should have asked you what was wrong. Instead I walked away, unable to man up and face the fact that I may have been the reason behind the tears streaming down your face.
I should have tried harder to make you happier, to make you feel loved.
I never expected you to forgive me for hurting you, but now I'll never even get the chance to apologise...and that is my biggest regret.
MC, my angel, my love. If you're out there, if you can hear me. I wanted to let you know how sorry I am. And while I know that I most certainly do not deserve for you to give me a second chance...I wanted you to know that I love you. I always have.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder (Jumin × MC) -Positive mental attitude series :)
Author's note: Reblog, DO NOT repost!!
When he gets home from work and finds that you aren't waiting at your usual spot by the front door to greet him, he knows something is wrong. He wanders the penthouse before finding you sobbing inside on the other side of a locked bathroom door. He spends a full ten minutes coaxing you to unlock the door, and when you finally do he finds you sitting cross-legged on the floor with your back against the wall. Ignoring the fact that he's still in his suit and that the floor was teeming with germs, he kneels beside you and delicately dabs your tear-stained face with a couple sheets of toilet paper. He waits for your shoulders to stop shaking and for your eyes to be dry from tears before finally asking the question you knew you couldn't avoid. "Why are you crying?"
You gaze up at him with red-rimmed eyes before responding in a hoarse whisper. "Jumin...do you think I'm pretty?"
"Oh, MC..."
Anguish flickers in his eyes as he wraps an arm around your shoulder. He holds you silently for a while, only speaking up again after several moments have passed.
"Have you ever heard the phrase 'beauty is in the eye of the beholder'? It's used to express the fact that not all people have the same opinions about what is attractive. The truth is, not everyone is going to find you attractive. But that doesn't mean you're not beautiful. You are not defined by someone else's opinion."
You nestle against him, burying your face in his chest. He draws you closer to him as he continues to speak. "You asked me if I thought you were pretty, and my answer is no. You are beyond pretty. You are elegant and majestic and absolutely ethereal. I think...I honestly think you're the most beautiful girl I've ever set my eyes on. Both inside and out. You're perfect just the way you are."
"I love your smile. I love the way your eyes light up whenever you talk about your favourite show. I love the way you put your heart and soul into everything that you do..." He starts rambling off a list of positive traits, and while you initially find it hard to believe that he thinks so highly of you...there's just something about that look on his face that makes you believe that he geniunely thinks the world of you. You're sobbing again, but this time they aren't tears of sorrow. You're so, so stupidly grateful for him.
He presses a gentle kiss to your temple, and you feel his lips moving against your skin. "I love you."
I deeply regret not posting anything for my marshmallow husband's birthday asdfghjkl so here's an extremely belated birthday gift. Happy belated birthday Saeran. I love you.
The RFA party was a roaring success. You stood on the second floor of the ballroom rented for the event, taking sips from the champange flute you held delicately in your right hand as you watched the evening play out. You had worked tirelessly to invite as many guests as possible, and it was evident your hard work had paid off; the room was twice as packed as it was the year before. Despite the fact that many of the guests were attendees of the previous fundraiser, you barely recognised anyone. You couldn't even pick out the RFA members from the crowd. 'Masquerade ball' had been the theme decided for this year's party, and as a result nearly everyone had shown up with their faces hidden behind masks.
You wore a mask too, a magenta coloured one decorated with blue roses. A tribute to a certain someone and the signature magenta coat he never seemed to go anywhere without. And of course, the blue rose that always seemed to be pinned to its lapel. It had been two years since the 'Mint Eye Incident', -as everyone called it- but you still thought of Ray all the time. You had been told that the Magenta building had been destroyed in a freak explosion. There were no survivers. While the rest of the RFA -or at least, Seven- mourned the lost of information that could have given them more insight on the mysterious 'Mint Eye', you mourned for the sweet boy that took care of you during the time you spent there.
You missed Ray dearly; there hadn't been a day that had gone by during your stay at Magenta where you didn't see him. He had catered to your every need as though you were a princess, making sure you had everything you needed for a comfortable stay and more. He'd even brought -and sometimes made- you your meals personally. Despite his busy schedule, he always made time for you. He called you from time to time to make sure you weren't lonely, and took you on strolls in the enchanting garden that was attached to the main building. After all those hours spent by his side, you had grown awfully fond of him. Judging from the way he had looked at you, you suspected he felt the same way.
Everyone had told you time and time again that it wasn't your fault, but you deeply regretted not being able to convince him to leave with you when the RFA had arrived rescue you from 'the Saviour'. What you wouldn't give to have him by your side right now.
"Excuse me, miss. But do you happen to be the party coordinator?"
You sigh. You had been hiding on the second floor to avoid having to interact with anyone, but it seems as though a guest has managed to find you anyway. Reluctantly, you fix a smile to your face and turn to face the owner of the voice that had interrupted you train of thought. Your eyes widen with shock. The champange flute slips from your grasp and champange spills all over the front of your dress, but you couldn't care less.
You wonder if you've had too much to drink.
Standing before you is someone you hadn't expected to see ever again, someone you hadn't seen in two full years. Tears pool in your eyelids. He reaches out towards you and you immediately fling yourself into his outstretched arms and bury your face into his chest.
"Ray." You sob. "It's you...it's really you. You're really here."
Ray wraps his arms around your waist, drawing you closer to him before pressing a gentle kiss to the top of your head. "It's me. I'm here. I'm sorry it took me so long, princess."
I'm opening match ups!! For a while at least. See here for more info :)
"Rumour has it...I make you nervous."
"In your dreams, Mr Han." You scoffed, crossing your arms over your chest as you turned to face the owner of the voice. Jumin Han -the young heir of C&R International- mirrowed your actions as he raised an eyebrow at you.
Although you met his skeptical gaze unflinchingly and rolled your eyes at his words, the truth was...he was right. You would never admit it out loud, -especially not to him- but he did make you nervous. Terribly so. Your heart was racing as the both of you stared each other down. Your heartbeat thudded so loudly in your ears that you wondered if he could hear it too. It would explain why he was looking at you so smugly. You dropped your gaze. He could have this victory. There was no point in denying it any further; you were certain he could see right through you.
"In my dreams, huh?" You could hear the triumphant tone in his voice as he took a step towards you. Deftly hooking a finger under your chin and tilting your head up, he forced you to look at him. Mesmerized by his silver eyes, you barely noticed him leaning in closer and closer to you until his lips were pressed against yours. You could feel him smiling into the kiss as he murmurs his next words against your lips. "Are you aware that you're blushing, my dear?"
"Geez guys, GET A ROOM!"
You reluctantly pulled away from Jumin to find that all eyes were on you and your husband. While most of the party guests lost interest in your public display of affection pretty quickly, the same can't be said for the RFA members; Zen was still yelling at the both of you while Luciel brandished a camera, no doubt he'd recorded the whole thing for blackmail purposes. You smiled apologetically at them, but Jumin didn't seem to share your feelings of embarrassment. Perhaps Zen's disapproval even encouraged his next actions.
You caught a glint of mischief in Jumin's eyes beforehand, but it still came as a shock to you when his lips crashed against yours as he wound an arm around your waist to draw you closer to him. It's only when Zen stormed off, fed-up with the both of you, that Jumin ended the kiss. Cheeks flushed, you raised an eyebrow at your husband's smug expression. He smirked at you in response. "Rumour has it...you're adorable when you're flustered."
Beautiful (Jihyun Kim/V × MC) -Positive mental attitude series :)
Author's note: Reblog, do not repost! Enjoy xxx
"Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it."
-Confucius
His eyesight was failing him.
This was old news to him. His eyesight had been deteriorating for a while now, and it only got worse with each passing day. Jumin's offer to source for the best medical treatment possible was still open of course, but Jihyun still hesitated, wary at the idea of going under the knife.
Besides, if he hung out with her often enough, he'd never need surgery. Whenever they went out together, her melodic voice would fill his ears as she chattered non-stop about their surroundings. With her by his side, flowers once again blossomed in a million different shapes and colours, and sunsets blazed before his very eyes, painting the skies with dazzling shades of red and gold. It was a pity that she hadn't chosen writing as a career path. Despite the fact that he could barely see out of his left eye and his right eye wasn't faring any better, her descriptions were so detailed and vivid that he could almost convince himself that he could see again. There was just one problem...
"You make everything but yourself sound so beautiful."
Her voice trailed off. She was so quiet that Jihyun momentarily wondered if she'd wandered off and left him standing alone in the middle of the park. It was only when she slid her hand into his and continued from where she'd left off from her description of a family of ducks -albeit in a slightly more subdued voice- that he realised that she was still here. He gently squeezed her hand in response to let her know he was still listening, but truthfully speaking, his heart wasn't as into it as before. It was too busy shattering itself into a million tiny pieces as he berated himself. She meant the world to him, she was more precious than any gemstone in the world. Such a talented, kind, intelligent and absolutely beautiful creature...how could she feel this way about herself? How had he not noticed that she felt this way?
At that moment in time, he made a silent promise to himself to contact Jumin about the prospective options for treatment when he got home. She'd helped him to once again see the beauty in so many things...he wanted to be the one to show her how beautiful she was, both inside and out.
I haven't posted a fic in forever (oops sorry y'all) but I found a fic in my phone that I wrote ages ago but never posted. Enjoy!!
P.S if you like the match-ups I do, stick around for Halloween! I've got something special planned. The best part about it is that if you've gotten a match-up from me before you'll still be able to participate ^-^
As you slowly begin to regain consciousness, you become increasingly aware of the pounding in your head. It feels as though someone is taking a sledgehammer to your skull. Letting out a soft groan, you crack open an eye and immediately regret it; the seemingly blinding light illuminating your surroundings does nothing for your headache. Rubbing your forehead with the heel of your palm, you gaze around the room. You're shocked to discover that you're no longer in the pastel hued room that you had been occupying for the past week. In fact, you don't even seem to be in the Magenta building anymore. You're lying on a sofa in an apartment you don't recognise. How did you...get here? A memory flickers at the back of your mind, demanding your attention. Something about the Savior requiring your assistence...being thrown in a locked cell in the basement of the building...Saeran reasuring you that this will all be over soon...
Oh no...Saeran.
Your migraine all but forgotten, you get up from the sofa you're lying on and stumble around the apartment you're in, calling his name as loudly as your hoarse voice lets you. Your feeble search attempts prove futile...he's no where to be found. You circle the apartment twice, thrice more before collasping back on the sofa when your legs threaten to give out beneath you.
Just where could he be?
You spot your mobile phone on the coffee table. You were about to pick it up and give him a call, but then you noticed that it was weighting an envelope down. The envelope was addressed to you by name, in a untidy scrawl that you didn't recognise. Curious, you slide the envelope off the table. Inside, you find a handwritten letter -presumably from Saeran. You skim through it quickly, hoping that it'll give you a clue to his whereabouts.
"To my beloved MC.
It must be terribly confusing for you to wake up alone in a stranger's apartment. I'm sorry, MC. It isn't an ideal arrangement, but you'd be safe there. The apartment used to belong to Rika when she was still the party coordinator of the RFA, and it's heavily protected to keep its many secrets away from the prying eyes of those who wish to abuse them.
You were right all along. Mint Eye isn't the paradise I always assumed it was. I should have listened to you from the very beginning...but instead I ignored your warnings and as a result you got hurt. I'm sorry for all the terrible things I said to you...I honestly didn't mean any of them. I wish I could turn back the clock and take back all those horrible words. You are so precious to me. More than anything, I want to take you in my arms and keep you by my side...but I can't. You deserve better.
Maybe our paths will cross again someday, but until then...I need to leave so that you can bloom. I'll never forget you, MC. Thank you for being a part of my life, no matter how brief our time together was.
Goodbye...my first and last love. May hope and happiness follow you wherever you go.
I love you.
Sincerely,
Saeran."
Uncomprehending, you read through the letter over and over again. Tears begin to pool in your eyelids and cause your vision to blur. You're biting your lower lip so hard that you can taste blood, but despite your best efforts you fail to suppress your sobs.