Suzume steps into the cafe, scanning the room. Her eyes catch her sisters’, and the makes her way to the booth Natsumi’s sitting in.
“Sorry ‘m late,” she says, sliding into the empty seat. “I got lost.”
The two sit in a slightly frosty silence. Neither is comfortable in each other’s presence yet, and both of them find various interesting things to stare at in order to avoid eye contact. For Natsumi, it’s the bottom of her coffee cup. For Suzume, it’s the back of her hand. Finally, Natumi speaks up.
“...Why’d you call? I thought you didn’t want t’ see me again.”
“Well, what th’ hell else was I supposed t’ do? She’s all I’ve got left.”
Natsumi opens her mouth to respond, but closes it again and just nods. Suzume breaks eye contact, but continues.
“...’m supposed t’ make up with y’ or somethin’. But... I dunno how.”
“Yeah. Yeah, I am. ’m fuckin’ pissed, Natsumi. I dunno if I ever won’t be.”
Natsumi nods again. She brushes a lock of hair out of her face, tucking it behind her ear, and makes a suggestion. “Maybe I could tell you my side of things. That might help.”
“If I tell you, will y’ listen?”
Suzume sighs. “...Yeah. I will.”
“Alright.” But where to start? Natsumi isn’t sure. She has a lot to say: this is a long story, as she and her sister already know well. And if she ever wants a chance of patching things with Suzume up, she knows she’s got to say everything. She’s got to make her understand. Still... where does she start? Taking a deep breath, she decides she’ll just go from the beginning. Where things started. And all of a sudden, everything comes pouring out.
“I wasn’t happy, Suzume. I hadn’t been happy in that family for a long, long time. I could live with it, for a while, but after everythin’ that happened... it was just too much.
“I think it started - really started - when we found out ‘bout mum. I felt... betrayed, I guess, not that we all didn’t, but I guess it was one of th’ first times I clued into an’ rally thought about th fact that we maybe weren’t perfect. An’ then... she ran off, an’ left us with gran an’ dad.”
“I know this, Natsumi. I was there.”
“Anyway,” the older girl continues, “we were left with gran an’ dad. Gran tried her hardest - I’ll give th’ woman that, at least - but she couldn’t raise three kids on her own, ‘specially not three kids as different an’ argumentative as th’ three of us were. An’ on top of that she was trying t’ handle dad, an’ he wasn’t picking up any of th’ slack.” She pauses. “I think that’s when it got really bad, I think. ‘specially after dad walked out too.
“It was awful, honestly. Me an’ gran fighting all th’ time, you an’ I fighting all th’ time - you were fighting with everyone all th’ time, even Ichirou an’ kids from school. And I just got fed up. I couldn’t live with it any more. I put up with being there, with being miserable, a lot longer than y’ though, Suzume. Leaving wasn’t just something I decided on overnight.”
“Y’ sure did leave overnight, though.”
“And if I’d told you or gran, or, hell, even Ichirou? There’d just’ve been more yelling. I didn’t want that. It was all the fighting I was trying to get away from. I wanted more than that for myself, an’ walking out was the only way to get it.”
“Yeah, I’m... I’m sorry I didn’t.”
Suzume doesn’t say anything.
“...Do you understand now, though? Even a little bit?”
“Yeah. I think I get it.”
“...I am. But I don’t hate y’.”
