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260214 #Adrenaline3rdWin
My poor, sensitive nervous system... đ
Gotta make sure to get plenty of rest!
Youâre not flying above the ground,
youâre flying above your fears.
đ„đđ„
Those who fear falling never rise like this.
Boss
Ex-Fiance Jung Wooyoung x (F)Reader
Summary: You thought you were finally free. You thought you had finally moved on from all of it. What you did not expect was for him to come find you.
Genre: Hurt+Comfort
Rating: PG-17
Warnings: isolation, language
Word Count: 4.6 K
Est.Read Time: 19 min
A/N: Did I spend several hours writing this instead of sleeping? Yes. Did I pause writing 3 short drabbles for this? Yes. Is it out of my system? Yes. Is it good? Idk, maybe.
âThisâŠis new.â You whispered, leaning closer to look at the man who was looking at anything but your face, even though he chose to sit on the barstool next to yours, crushing the bouquet in his death grip, trying to keep his sharp tongue at bay.
âSh-shut up.â
You didn't acknowledge the remark, only reached up to caress the hair out of his eyes. Your touch did little to calm him down, instead his body jerked on its own, too afraid of your touch. A few more seconds and he would have lost control. It didn't bother you though. It was just odd to see your fiance- ex-fiance, one who had ignored you since the day the two of you were introduced, one who had specifically told you the day you met that you were nothing like his ideal type and never will be. Your fiance who let you know, ever so bluntly, ever so boldly, ever so blatantly, âThis is nothing more than a contractual marriage, don't get your hopes up, I'm not a fan of people pleasers- especially when they try to rationalise their stupidity.â
Truth be told, the day he had said that you, you were a bit more than just shocked. You wereâŠdisappointed. Sure, were you a people pleaser? Yes. Were you constantly trying to please your parents? Of course, you were the eldest; you were practically conditioned to be like that. Did you agree to this marriage without a second thought- yes, but did you do your background research? Yes. You knew he was blunt and you knew he was the oddball of his family. Still, you also knew he was good with kids because of his age gap with his youngest brother, you knew he liked animals, you knew he was fiercely protective of those he loved and you knewâŠhe was loyal. Perhaps you wished that one day youâd be able to find someone who would be your loyal, protective pillar- and once you met him, you had deeply wished it had been him.
Unfortunately, he was not at all willing to be that pillar, especially when he showed you your true reflection, reminding you how this marriage was a mere contract. He had gone out of his way to let you know that, being late to most of your dates, barely eating and talking to you. Heâd barely answer your phone, and if he did, he would hit you with, âWhat is the objective of this call?â There were times when heâd cancel on you at the last minute. He was least interested in any of the preparations for your wedding, the dress, the cake, the venue- but you were okay with that, you really were, because every time something like this would happen, youâd console yourself with one thought, âOnce we get married, heâll understand the real me.â
For almost half a year, it worked; your parents were happy, his parents were happy, and to some extent, you were fine with it too. The turning point came when you, who was busy picking the colour scheme of your wedding, spotted your fiancĂ© walking towards the very shop you were in, only for him to be tackled by a woman who he caught effortlessly, one whom you recognised as his secretary. You watched the woman drag him away with ease, as ifâŠhe was hers. Maybe he was, but one thing was for certain: you were done. That night you had gone home, and decided to let your parents know that you no longer wanted to continue with this relationship, choosing to leave out the details, because at the end of the day, you knew, that the reason did not matter, for your family this marriage, much like Wooyoung, was all about business, not loyalty, not companionship and definitely not love.
Thus, the outcome was predictable; in a matter of days, you were, in a way, exiled from your family. Your inheritance, gone. Your home, gone. Your privileges, gone. A part of you resented yourself for doing this, if you had just kept your mouth shut, everything would have been fine, but you resented your parents the most- even after all this, after uncanny number of times you had agreed to do and say whatever they had wished for, it hurt you the most when you realised that neither one of your parents nor any of your siblings had tried to even ask, âWhy?â That night, you realised that at the end of it all, you were always alone and perhaps you were never destined to be loved by anyone, not a significant other, not your siblings and especially not your parents. With a single suitcase, you had walked out of the house, never to look back at any of them, ready to start your life somewhere far far away.
That was more than a year ago, not that you were keeping count, to be exact, 1 year, 4 months and 12 days. You had managed to find a small town, one that was so insignificant that you knew that no one could be able to find you or recognise you here, giving you the perfect opportunity to start over again. With your job experience, you managed to attain a job as a teacher at the local school, a high school teacher. A job you were far too qualified for, but a job nonetheless, one that enabled you to get back on your feet. You were truly proud of yourself, people here liked you, respected you, respected your choices and for once in your life, you were able to decide for yourself. Your residence was a small upper portion in a house that belonged to an old couple; they were kind enough to let you stay for half the rent for almost 3 months, constantly telling you how you reminded the childless old couple of a daughter they never had. From your portion, you could see the open sea; every morning, youâd be able to watch the sunrise in peace before you started your day. In your time here your had also found a companion, a little black kitten, which you had rescued on a rainy night as you were running back from the local supermarket, it was balled up in front of your doorstep, shivering in whimpering, drenched to the bone and like the kind soul you were, you had taken it in- whom you later found out was a he, a very sassy he, which is why you had named him, âBossâ. Boss was your sole companion, watching you go about your day at home and sit with you in the evening, watching the sun set as heâd hop onto your lap, curling into you as the two of you would watch the peaceful day come to an end.
What you did not expect was that one chilly morning, as you skipped towards the school, smiling at the crunch of the snow beneath your boots, thinking of getting Boss a new toy on the way back today, was to see someone standing by the school gate- the devil himself, dressed in all black. His hair, longer than before, slicked back, sprinkled with a bit of white, soft snow, a cute contrast. He stood there in a long coat, an expensive coat, one that was way above your pay grade, hands stuffed in his pockets, glaring at the gate, with a muffler covering most of his face- he hadâŠfound you. You did not know what he was doing there, you didnât know why he was there, and to be frank, you really didnât want to know either, which is why that very moment you had spun on your heel and run back home, calling in sick to work.
ThatâŠwas on a Monday, todayâŠwas Friday. You did not know that youâd be so afraid of him that youâd skip work for five days. At this point you were sure that if the school really didnât need you, they would have definitely fired you. At this point, you didnât even know what to do, youâd contacted some of your spies, a few female students who had started gossiping about a good-looking man in black, whoâd be outside the schoolgate everyday, standing in the snow, looking around till school started and then heâd disappear. They had never seen his face, but it was natural for teenage girls to crush over someone so mysterious, and who were you to ruin their fantasies by telling them he was a mere cheater, a good-looking bastard, one with so many qualities you wished your partner would have, but life was not rainbows and butterflies. The girls had told you how he was finally confronted by a homeroom teacher, and although they did not know what had happened, they did confirm that the teacher assured all students that the man would no longer be bothering them. Good right? That was good news, he was gone- then why did you find yourself drinking on a Friday night at the local pub? Sitting in a corner, sulking in a corner, quietly staring at your empty cup, asking for one after another, until you were tipsy, tipsy enough to somehow hallucinate your ex-fiancĂ© sitting next to you, dressed in one of his finest suits, with a bouquet in his hand, glaring at you with disgust- ah, truly Wooyoung, a very true hallucination, because for the whole time you had known the man, he had looked at you with nothing but pure disgust in his eyes. It was shameful how your itty-bitty heart would still beat for him from time to time.
Wooyoung frowned at your state, his grip tightening on the bouquet as you reached to touch him, only for him to jerk away at the slightest touch. He had spent over a year looking for you, and the first time he had seen you after so long, it was from a distance, running away from him; he was too late. Now, now that he had finally found you again, thanks to the help of that school teacher, here you were, drinking away like this- he had thought you were better than this. That day, he had thought you would march up to him, yell at him for ruining his life, hit him for being the reason behind your exile- say something. He did not expect you to run away, nor did he expect you to hide for a week; most importantly, he did not take you for someone whoâd drink away in fear. You had spent a whole year on your own, turned your life around, made something out of yourself, surrounded by people who valued you and respected you, so why were you still so afraid to confront him?
âYouâre drunk.â he mumbled, gripping your wrist, moving it away from his face, his other hand placing the bouquet on the counter as he looked for your belongings.
âI am tipsy, stupid good-looking hallucination, now, be gone.â with that you snatched your wrist out of his hand and tried to stand up, only the sudden movement caused you to lose your footing, almost falling over, only for him to catch you midfall, pulling you up as you leaned against him, mumbling, âIf onlyâŠyou were this nice to me back then.â You tried to push yourself off him, only for his hold on you to tighten, gently squeezing you in his hold, his chin on top of your head as he took a deep breath, trying to regulate his emotions, organise his thoughts, right now, he needed to get you home, needed for you to be safe, needed you to sober up- only then could he continue on with his agenda.
âHold still, if you keep moving youâll fall!â
You rolled your eyes at the whining, but stopped moving, letting him carry you on his back as he climbed up the stairs of your portion, only to stop in front of your door.
âKeys.â
âStupid face, why would I give a hallucination my keys.â
âYou think your hallucinations can carry you around?â
âIf I manifest real hard, yeh-â
âFor f*ckâs sake-â he slowly manoeuvred you off him, helping you stand upright, only for you to lean into his side, watching him take off your purse, the one that hung on his shoulder, rummaging through it for your keys. Paying no mind to it, you closed your eyes, enjoying his warmth and scent, carelessly mumbling, âYou smell nice.â
âTskâŠof course I do, itâs the cologne you got me.â
In a successful attempt to find your keys, he opened the lock and walked inside, taking you with him, looking around at the small portion only to pause at the sight of a black thing on your bed, its golden eyes glaring back at him, tail swishing in frustration, before it began to tap against your bed, something you picked up. With a squeal, you pushed the man away and stumbled towards Boss, falling onto your knees in front of him as you reached out for him, âBoss, my baby, I missed you so much.â
Wooyoung could swear he saw the catâs glare soften, especially when you crawled onto the bed and hugged it, but he was more concerned about the choice of name. Who names their snarky cat that? Pushing the thought away he took off his coat and placed it on the couch near by, walking over to your passed out form, reaching to touch your face, only to hiss and instantly pull back, gripping his hand at the pain, the sharp sting, as he noticed the cut on his palm, before glaring at the cat that stood tall beside your head, hissing at him.
âTchâŠI found her before youâŠIf you were half the man you pretend to be, you would be taking better care of her, no- am I arguing with a cat?â
.
The faint sound of someone humming stirred you out of your dreamless slumber, before reality set in seconds after, as you sat up instantly, gasping at the sight of the man, his back facing you as he stood above the stove, humming to himself- shit, how-no-what? It was all a dream, a weird hallucination, a sick trick your mind was playing on you-
âAh, youâre finally awake.â Wooyoung glanced over his shoulder, eying the way you stared at him in shock, of course you didnât remember, âYou were a bit more than tipsyâŠdonât worry, your hallucination made you hangover soup.â
Truth be told, you have never had a civil conversation with this madman, so it came as no surprise when he had left you speechless with his kind words and actions, especially when he walked over to you, tray in hand, wearing your pink apron, placing it in front of you before mumbling, âCareful, it's hot.â With that, he had walked back over into the open kitchen, hissing at the cat that rubbed itself against his leg, âOh, so now you wanna play all nice, want me to tell her how you almost sliced my hand off?â Regardless of his harsh words, you watched him pop open a can of tuna and chug it into Bossâ bowl before walking back to you and sitting at the edge of your bed, staring at you.
âWell, itâs not poisoned.â
âWhy are you here?â
Your question did not, per say catch him off guard, but it did annoy him. To a point where he scowled at you, reminding you that this was the true Wooyoung, whatever that domestic crap that was going on a few minutes ago was a mere facade, and it irked you, it bothered you enough for you to toss the tray onto the floor, away from yourself, not bothered about the loud sound it made, or the way you basically broke your own dishes, too triggered by the bastard in front of you.
âAre you out of your damn mind?â Wooyoung yelled, almost jumping away at the impact, quickly glancing at your cat to make sure it was unharmed before looking back at you, granted he wanted a reaction but this-
âWhy are you here?! You think just because you become all domestic, Iâll forget about what you did? What about her? What kind of sick cheater are you?â
He watched you stand up, and walk over to him, letting you grip his collar and pull him closer, though he was too busy trying to connect the dots, what did you mean by âherâ? Who was her?
His lack of response only angered you more, as you shoved him away, and walked over to the kitchen to grab a broom and glare up at him, âGet the f*ck out of here- Iâm not afraid of you, or them,â you continued your monologue as you began to clean up the mess, âI donât know what you want from me, but you got what you wanted, you got your skank, so leave me alone! I donât care how much theyâre paying you to do this, but it isnât worth- â
âWhat on earth are you talking about?â He mumbled, cutting you off before standing up and walking over to you, towering over you. Only then did you realise how he perhaps was a bit more intimidating than you had given him credit for, flinching when he raised his hand, âYour family doesnât give a flying f*ck about you.â His words cut in deep; they stung, but you didnât have time for that, you were too concerned about his raised hand, waiting for some kind of sharp impact. He was right, your family never did care about you, maybe he was here on his own, out here to teach you a lesson for disrespecting him like that, ending the marriage and running off, ruining his image and reputation. He was a man respected by many, and you had left him hanging and just ended it all, disrespecting not only him but his family, his elders, his-
Wooyoung gently placed his hand on top of your head, ever so softly patting your head as if trying to soothe a feral cat, cutting your train of thought instantly, his next words completely catching you off guard, âI spent a whole year looking for you, I always wanted you to stand up for yourself, I justâŠdidnât know theyâd toss you out like that. No one deserves to go through that, especially not someone as selfless as you.â His hand slowly trailed down to cup your cheek, tilting your head up ever so slightly so you would look at him, his gentle eyes meeting your glassy ones, âI understand that youâre upset, you have every right to be. You have suffered for no reason, and I was the root cause. I know that I am an a**hole, but what I am not is a cheater. Not once in our time together did I defile our relationship like that.â
âTh-thatâs not true! I saw you with her!â you words came out as a choked sob, too defeated to push him away as you stared up at him, tears helplessly streaming down your face as you reached for him once more, gripping his shirt, âThat day, at the shop, I saw her- I saw you- your stupid secretary, stop it- stop trying to play this sick game! Please just leave me alone.â Ironically, your words did not match your actions, especially when you leaned against him, your forehead resting against his chest as you slowly let out all the feelings you had bottled up since that night, âA-all I wanted was for you to see me for me- but all you did was hate me- so what if I never said no? So what if I agreed to what they said?! They were my parents, no? Was it wrong for me to meet their expectations? Was it wrong for me to expect them to love me for being obedient? How could you hate me for that? How could you be so heartless?â
Oh. So that was it.
âSilly girl.â he wrapped his arms around you, pulling you into a hug, almost crushing you against him, âThat day, what you saw was a mere incident, its true that that woman clung onto me, but I had no relation with her, itâs on me for not letting her go the moment I realised she had feelings for me, but what could I do when I was always occupied with the thoughts of you. That day, I was coming to that stupid shop to tell you to either take a stand or I would end this contract myself. I was not going to live my life with someone whom I did not choose.â He felt you try to push him away, only for him to hold you closer, âI donât know why you didnât bring this up with me. I would have told you the truth. Once I settled everything with her, I came to know about your little standoff. Truth be told, I was glad you took a stand, even before I could make my move, yet what I did not expect was for your family to toss you out like that.â
Slowly, he moved the two of you towards your couch, gently sitting you down, holding your hands as he knelt before you, looking up at you, âAnd youâre wrong, I never hated you, I could never hate you. You think I never saw the real you? I saw the real you the moment we first met, it only pissed me off when I realised you chose to ignore yourself in the hopes of your family being able to see the real you- how could I be your pillar of strength when your foundation of being was weak?â You looked down at him with an unreadable expression, one that excited him, one that gave him hope. He had always been able to read you before this; you were too predictable, too nice, too fake, but now, the person glaring down at him, looking down at him, analysing him- this was a completely different person, this was the real you.
âThenâŠwhy are you here?â
Ah, there it was, the curiosity, the need to rationalise events, only this time, you werenât trying to use your logic to rationalise your stupid actions, but to rationalise the outcome of your future actions, this was his chance.
âI spent a year and a half looking for you, they didnât even bother keeping track of their firstborn. It was truly disgusting. I was looking for youâŠbecause I wanted to apologise. I never meant for it to turn out like this. I never wanted you to suffer; you were doing pretty well on that aspect yourself, didnât really need my help.â His head tilted in amusement, letting out a chuckle when you huffed in annoyance, but waited for him to continue, âEither way, I finally tracked you here, that day you ran away, and then you didnât show up- all I wanted was to say I was sorry, I was even prepared to be slappedâŠWhat I did not expect was for your filthy feral feline to scratch meâŠnor did I expect to realise that even after so long, I still fancied you.â
âLike hell you did.â
You pulled your hands out of his hold, crossing your arms over your chest, glaring down at him, âYou think I believe you? Sure, that secretary thing, yeah, maybe you werenât cheating, your apology, fine- but donât think for a second that I would believe you if you said you even at a mere moment of our time together, actually liked me.â
âIf I didnât like you, I wouldnât have tried to make it work for a year.â
You frowned at his statement, watching him finally stand up and sigh in defeat, âBut every damn time,â he walked over to the mess and began to clean up, almost looking like a nagging grandma, âYouâd be busy pretending to be a puppet, it was weird to see your parents pull your strings, a grown woman. I didnât choose the cake, so you could. I didnât choose the dress, so you could. I didnât choose the venue, the damn music, the bloody food- all so you could, but every time, youâd let them decide! Wasnât it enough for them to seal your fate for you with the marriage that you had to go out of your way to give them moments that were rightfully ours?!â
Thatâs when it hit you, he wasâŠright. All this time, you had wanted him to care about you, to see how you were willing to do the same for him, but instead, your actions were doing nothing but dismissing him, dismissing his presence, his role as your husband, his role as your other half.
He placed the broom back in its place, tying the knot on the garbage bag before he turned to look at you, raising an eyebrow at your sunken state, âI knowâŠI realised my approach was wrong, it was stupid butâŠIâŠâ he paused, closing his eyes for a moment to take a deep breath, only to open them when he exhaled as he looked at you, staring at your lap, âIâŠjust need to know ifâŠyouâre finally happy.â
You looked up at him, blinking away the tears before nodding, not even sparing a moment to think. You were happy, from the moment you stepped outside of that wretched place, from the moment you were able to take a deep breath of fresh air, of freedom, you wereâŠhappy.
âI am.â
Wooyoung visibly relaxed, a chuckle escaping him as he leaned against the counter, his body language as relaxed as your cats. Oh, you could see why you liked your cat being this sassy; you were just attracted to a**holes with kind hearts. He nodded and walked over to the couch, picking up his coat as he stared at you, âGood. Be happy, remain free, make your own choices-â
âMake it up to me, you a**hole.â
He flinched at the choice of words, before twitching at the way you sneered at him, you had just cut him off, his cool and mature monologue, you were as insufferable as your filthy feline companion. Did he give you the chance of freedom, or did he help create a monster, who knows, either way, he liked it. He could only nod at the statement before dropping his coat and flopping down next to you, swiftly cupping your face as he drank in your expressions, enjoying the way you maintained eye contact, âWell, I was going to, but you just had to ruin the moment. Though I donât really like kissing on the first date.â
âYou gonna ask me out on a date, Jung?â
âI mean, I was gonna ask you to marry me, but I guess a date sounds better, no? It would be a weird example to set for your student, no?
âKeep my children out of this.â
âHow can I? When they were ever so kind as to tell me where you live and where I could find you on a cold Friday night.â
Ah, so thatâs how he had found you tonight. Well, you would have punished those kids, but considering how you were currently being spoon-fed a warm, cooked meal by a very noisy but good-looking man, you may have to consider letting them off the hook this time. Especially when said man stroked your cheek lovingly, mumbling a gentle, âYou look so hot when you boss me around-â only for him to ruin the moment. Oh, so youâd have to get used to this nonsense tooâŠwellâŠmight as well, as long as youâd finally have him all to yourself, as long as youâd finally have someone to call yours, someone whoâd see you, for you, no matter how stupid and annoying they were.
âWho the hell names their cat Boss? Like sheesh? I know I had to teach you to stand up for yourself, do I need to teach you how to give na- screw that, Iâm naming our kids.â
ATEEZ Hongjoong in Adrenaline M/V
Maxed out - charcoal on paper




