Dealing with Adversity
What is ADVERSITY? Webster’s dictionary defines it simply as difficulties or misfortune.
Every single person who ever lived has dealt with ADVERSITY in one form or another. It’s part of life. No one is immune from encountering it throughout life and everyone’s individual ADVERSITY is uniquely their own.
Could that be it though? ADVERSITY - it’s just a part of life and it’s just something we have to deal with or is there more to it than that? There’s gotta be more to it right? Like things shouldn’t just suck out of nowhere. Shit shouldn’t just get rough, difficult and challenging for no reason right?
I think ADVERSITY has a purpose and it’s much deeper than just struggle without reason. Even if there isn’t a deeper reason for it, doesn’t it just feel like it would be much more beneficial to us if we believed that there was? Let’s break it down.
If ADVERSITY has a purpose, what would it be?
ADVERSITY could very well be present in our lives to teach us something that we might really be needing to learn. It could be there to push or pull us towards lessons that will truly help us in understanding some of the virtues of life or what some might call “the guiding principles” like PATIENCE, HUMILITY, INTEGRITY, DECENCY, COMPASSION, GRATITUDE. Just to name a few.
Maybe ADVERSITY is there to sweeten up the good times or even just to make us realize what good really is. Think about it - Would we know what good is if it weren’t for anything bad? There needs to be 2 parts to the spectrum. Like if there’s light there’s dark, or if there’s hot there’s cold.
Also, ADVERSITY could be there to bring out our truest potentials. They say “You don’t know how strong you are until being strong is your only choice.” I think that quote says a lot. Our potential can either remain dormant within us or we can choose to develop it or we can be forced to tap into it when our backs are up against the wall and by doing so we rise above the adverse situation!
What are some ways that I’ve learned to deal with adversity?
First of all, I recognized that my default mindset was not effective when dealing with any type of ADVERSITY be it small or large. I had to change my entire mindset. Although that seems overwhelming, all I really did was make one small tweak.
Instead of falling victim to ADVERSITY when it presented itself and wondering “why are these things always happening to me?”, I made a switch and asked myself “how is this happening for me and what lesson am I supposed to learn from this situation?”.
How has that change in mindset helped me?
Applying this subtle shift in the way I was thinking when ADVERSITY shows up has helped me tremendously and here’s how.
I no longer look at adversity as a bad thing. I just accept it to be a necessary part in my overall development as I step into the best version of myself.
It’s gotten me to feel like I’m taking all of my power back which in turn has helped me with my confidence. Not a fake egotistical confidence. I’m referring to a true, unshakeable confidence that is rooted in self love.
It’s helped me come to a place of clarity and has made me feel more excited about what else life has to offer especially as I now feel that I have the tools to deal with anything life throws at me.
Don’t get it twisted, I still deal with a lot of shit and I still struggle a lot but now I feel that when things go off course for me, I have what it takes to handle it much better than I would in the past. Life is a figuring it out process. No one knows it all and I sure as hell don’t lol. Some folks may seem like they’ve got it figured out but that’s just because they’re much more confident in their abilities to deal with whatever happens in their lives and they continuously work every moment to keep building on that progress. That’s just it. We’re all just works in progress. We all want different things out of life and our human tendency is to overthink things when really we just need to let go and trust ourselves, trust the process and trust the timing of the universe.
What are some more simple ways I deal with adversity?
I wait until I’m in a less emotional state before I make any decision on what my next move will be. For instance, if I’m mad I will do my best to calm down before I do or say anything else. I take the time to figure out the best way I can respond to the situation rather than just react right away. Practicing this more and more prepares me for situations where I have to think quick and make fast decisions. Find the smaller moments to really work on this and cultivate this skill.
I lean on my support system. I’m very blessed to have plenty of people that I can go to when I need advice or help with anything and if you’re blessed to have even one person to go to that will have your back and always have the best intentions for you then I suggest you reach out when you need to. Shit gets really hard some times and we may not always figure out the best course of action but someone who cares for you can offer a different perspective or solution that you didn’t even realize was there.
Sometimes depending on what type of situation it is, I just be patient and wait for the storm to pass. I do the small things that I can do and control but after that I just take it easy and try not to add stress to the situation. Again, it depends on the type of adversity that I’m dealing with at the time.
At the end of the day, I know adversity will show up in my life again and again but rather than let that rule over me, I choose to prepare myself by focusing on small things that I can improve upon each day that way when something drastic happens, I’m more adept at dealing with it straight on instead of getting surprised and knocked completely off course which is obviously super tough to bounce back from. Live life simply. Focus on your health and happiness without causing harm to others. Challenge yourself to learn and get better little by little each day and naturally things will fall into place. I’m really experiencing that a lot lately and it’s a great feeling and I know it’s a place that everyone can be in their lives. You can too! =)
