#alyantorcha

[photophobiic]

My drawing of aly antorcha This was my 8th try! I gave up on the detail of the hair and turned it into a galaxy.

[thatgirljaleeah]

[rainb0w-dr0p]

So I come on tumblr to see that Aly Antorcha has followed me....life complete.

[rainb0w-dr0p]

Waiting for Aly to follow you Is like waiting for rain in a drought.

[solemnty]

Hey Again, Ms. Aly-

Hey Aly. It's me again. I posted something for you the other day in your tag. I want you to know this. Things might seem like shit right now. Actually not seem. They are. But you're strong, and extremely resilient from what I've seen. But seriously seriously seriously take my next words to heart.

It's okay to.. Not be okay.

It's okay to be sad, stressed, and tired.

And to let people see you like that. I'm not saying you have to depend on them wholeheartedly.

The key is to just. Do things, while you're sad, stressed, and tired. Which you are. Most people let it stunt them. Most people just stop in their tracks. But you can't control emotions. Can you control mood? Of course. I can put on brighter clothes, have a positive outlook, open the blinds, go on walks. Keep myself active and around people that stimulate my senses.

But sometimes you're still going to feel sad, stressed, and tired still. And again, that's okay. It's out of your control.

And feeling upset that you're upset just makes you feel.. double upset. It's just arbitrary and cruel to do that to yourself. Be gentle on your soul, lovely. Because you're beautiful, just going through a hard time.

I don't know you or your mom, or your guys' issues. But just remember she has her own perspective and hopefully loves you and is just trying to be a parent the best way she knows how. I'm not saying that to guilt you, but just to remind you that despite the fact that we think think our parents know what they're doing because they're older than us, isn't necessarily true. We can't expect them to know what's best for us all the time, especially now that we're older. So as weird as it is, teaching them what you need from them is what sometimes needs to be done. Not in a preachy way. But just. Honest. If you want to be left alone and not comforted, say that. If you want a hug instead of being given space, say that. They're not going to know what to do unless you tell them what you need, you know? It's a two way street though, and that's the part that's the hardest is that they also have to be willing to listen and change their habits. Which may not always happen. Just be patient though, and realize that they're watching you grow and change and it's hard on them too because while you're figuring out who you are, they're also going through changes and a shift in how to see you, as a young adult now, as well.

As for your boy guy person, don't be afraid of letting him in. It's scary. It's really scary. Not to keep an arm out and a buffer zone. But he doesn't look like a bad guy. And you know what? If shit happens, and he fucks you over, or you fuck him over, then it happens. And you're strong enough to overcome it because hey. You're alive, you have your limbs, and you're breathing and have food and a place to live. If he's willing to stick around while you're figuring yourself out and defining yourself, then it'll be okay. Because not everyone is going to be pearly white and pristine all the time. Not you, not him. He's not going to hurt you. Honestly. And you know if he does, and if a huge fight and fuck up happens, I'm sure if you guys care about each other, there's a thing called working on it. If you want to. And surprisingly some guys are patient and understanding enough. I didn't think so till recently lol. And if they're not, if they don't want to be around while you're doing your thing and trying to do this thing we call life, then you know, I wouldn't really want them there in the first place.

Life isn't about how many times you fall down. It's about how many times you stand back up.

Always here for you, girly. <3

Flowers and bunnies forever,

Tati.

[solemnty]

To Ms. Antorcha--

Hey Aly. I just wanted to write to you to let you know that I dunno. I've watched you grow up, and watched all the hate and bullshit you've gone through and I feel the pain you've gone through, in a way, because I'm an extremely empathetic person. As well of the fact that I've been bullied and cyber bullied in my life relentlessly. I wanted to just pop in and let you know that you handle it beautifully, generally. Sometimes it's hard to not get defensive and hurt, especially with how fucking mean people can be. But through all that, I just wanted to tell you that I see you for the sweet, sassy, genuine, goofy person you are. And that's why I keep coming back to see how your life's doing, even though you don't know me. And even if you say off the wall comments where I'm like "Alright, lady, calm your titties." But. You're extremely relatable because you do have faults, who the fuck doesn't, and you accept them. It's saddening that people only see you for those mistakes and faults sometimes though, and not the full picture, but it's bound to happen to everyone. When I follow you and praise you, as a person, I'm not doing so because 'ehmahgah she has pink hair she's sew perf' I just see a human. That lives, is beyond not perfect. And I hope you never strive to be. Because you'll never be perfect, no one will be. I just see a girl at the prime of her youth. And in the midst of her learning. To be an adult, getting to know who you really are, your likes, dislikes, mannerisms, etc. So am I, and that takes a lot of trial and error. I think to myself and the people that chastise you for being who you are and I think... What are you going to do? Not live your life and be yourself? Constantly live in this state of apology? No. Fact is is that some people are going to not like you, some people are going to hate you for the dumbest reasons. And you know. That's okay. Because I'm sure you don't like everyone that you encounter. I know I haven't. And that's utterly normal. Anyway. You have a lot of beautiful qualities and it's been wonderful seeing you grow and mature into the woman that you are now. Seriously. Please, never stay the same. Change, you're allowed to. Constantly strive to push out of your comfort zone and change, and grow into the person you want to be. Never let the people that don't understand pull you down. Because they're not living life through your eyes and will likely crucify you for taking one wrong step. Take that wrong step and take it proudly. Because from my experience, it just adds to the learning process. And that's all life is. A process. And you're doing it beautifully, my dear. Bunnies and flowers forever, Tatiana.

[whoistherealfelicefawn]

To the people asking, yes. I did contact my friend at Jack Wills about Aly and I do have a response. I will post screencaps of the texts tomorrow.