#andrea jackson

[andrea-jackson-blog1]

Aesthetic Prompt

  BOLD any which apply to your muse.

                                                 italicize what they like.

                                       remember to REPOST & not REBLOG.

                                               feel free to add to the list.

fire. ice. water. air. earth. claws. fangs. wings. gold. diamonds. grass. leaves. trees. roses. lilies. violets. metal. iron. rust. rain. snow. lava. silk. cotton. sun. moon. stars. blood. dirt. mud. silver. steel. sugar. salt. lavender. glass. wood. paper. wool. fur. smoke. ash. incense. ocean. bruise. scar. wind. spices. light. dark. paint. charcoal. wine. hard liquor. sweat. dust. bare feet. canine. feline. coffee. tea. books. scratches. petals. thorns. hay. glitter. heat. cold. steam. frost. candle. sword. dagger. fists. axe. staff. arrow. trident. hammer. shield. spikes. sand. rocks. roots. feathers. pearls. rubies. sapphires. emeralds. amethysts. herbs. waves. lightning. sunlight. moonlight. clay. stone. brick. lions. bears. wolves. tigers. coeurls. jaguars. guns. bandages. stage. cigarettes. gunpowder.

(Tagged by @scholarlysword. Guess I’ll tag @dragoonslament, @matriarchoffire, and anyone else that wants to do this? idk maaaaaaaan)

[andrea-jackson-blog1]

whats andrea's favourite race?

“Mah favorite race…? Ah dunno, guess Ah never really put much thought inta that kinda thing,” Andrea said, her gaze rising thoughtfully as a hand lifted to rub slowly at the back of her neck. “There’s somethin’ ‘bout elezen that’s real nice… both ta look at ‘n’ be around. ‘Course, they don’t have tails like ‘qo’te or au ra do…” She paused for a moment, then cleared her throat, cheeks flushed faintly. “Ain’t really got much a problem with most races. Few bad apples in the bunch, but they’re all decent folk fer the most part.”

[andrea-jackson-blog1]

Focuses and Fears

Decided I'd go to Mom's house again today. Not really for any special reason, I was just bored and wanted something to do. I was tired and sore from all the wood chopping I've been doing to get better at using the axe, so there wasn't too much I could do besides just relax in a bath somewhere, or just talk to people, and I really wasn't feeling all that interested in trying to chat up a stranger with how tired I was.

It was pretty uneventful at first. She was just feeding Anna, but not too much else was happening, really. Mister Cr Her dad was just sitting by the fire, and her mom was upstairs, I think. Either way, that's not really important. Guess I don't really know why I'm writing that down.

Wasn't too long before she made me go upstairs to get her axe. I didn't really understand why at the time, but apparently her axe sort of works as a focus. She didn't tell me that until after I'd brought it back down to her. Holding it was the weirdest sensation. My hand felt all tingly when I held it, but it wasn't enough to be uncomfortable. It was one of those things that I could have tuned out if I was focused enough. I wasn't used to it at all though, so it was actually kind of distracting.

Didn't know what it was until Mom said something, told me that it was a focus. That it was drawing aether from me just from me holding it. Just me holding it made the blade glow--and when I swung it to test its weight, it left a few embers in the air behind it. I had no idea what I was doing, or how I was doing it, but I was definitely doing it. Her advice was that I try to 'aid' the focus, but me focusing on it and visualizing aether flowing from my hand into the focus--which was a lot harder than it sounds just writing it down by the way. It's hard to explain--even doing all that didn't help at all.

So, she told me to take the axe with me to practice. Her axe. I'm honored she'd trust me enough to offer something like that so readily, but my first concern was: what if I had that with me, and had to fight another person? Her response, and she just sounded so 'matter-of-fact' when she said it, that it was just a little disturbing to me, was simply 'murder them'. I don't want to do that. I never want to do that. I'm so scared that that day will come. She kept saying that it will, that if I leave someone alive, it will only result in me making an enemy that wouldn't stop coming after me, or my family, and though she didn't say anything about it, my friends, too. I know she's right, but it didn't make me feel better at all. It didn't make me feel better when she said that all I had to do was 'have the conviction to know I was in the right'. Even if I -was- right, it wouldn't at all change the fact that someone would be dead, and they would be dead because of -me-.

I don't know how to deal with that kind of guilt. I don't know how I'd be able to face myself if that ever happened. Even if it's against a bandit, or a pirate, or something else unpleasant, they'd still be someone that had a whole life behind them, people that loved them, people that would have fought for them. Families, friends, children, spouses. It would all come to an end because of me.

I look at this axe that she gave me, and all I see is something dangerous. This isn't what I had in mind when I came to the conclusion that I wanted a focus.

[andrea-jackson-blog1]

Miss Tem.

I spoke with her again today--it occurs to me now that I have no idea how to spell the names of half of the people I meet. That's kind of hard to fix though. "Hey, I just met you, but would you mind telling me how to spell your name so I can write in my journal?" I can feel the awkwardness just writing that down. Anyway, I suppose I don't have too much to write about, but we had a nice talk in the Lavender Beds, and I need to jot some stuff down before I forget it all.

She came walking up looking all tired and beat up. Training, apparently, with an instructor that's real tough on her for even the tiniest mistakes. For when her aether's not cooperating'. Or, as she put it, that it's "sometimes best not to use aether". Not like I'd really know anything about that, but I figure she's gotta have some reason for it, right? But she described the bruises that she kept as 'shortcomings'. It was pretty disheartening to hear. That's why I told her it'd be self-defeating to think of them as shortcomings, that everyone makes mistakes, and that what really matters is whether she learned from them or not.

I don't really know if it stuck with her. I can hope, but I can't read minds. I wanted to write that down, though, so I can have it as a reminder for myself. It's something I need to keep in mind. If I'm going to give advice like that, I need to follow it. A knight doesn't go back on their word, or act like they have double standards.

A knight. I swallowed my fears and worries today, and said to her I was a knight. Even though it was in a bit of an off-hand manner. If I want to be a knight, then I need to act like one, stop second-guessing myself and telling myself I'm not cut out for it. Who wants to look for someone like -that- for hope or inspiration? I mentioned trying to help her with her training where I could, and like with most everyone else these days, it seems, she was confused why I'd just do something like that without any thought of reward, much less for someone I didn't know. I told her that it was the right thing to do, and that I'm a knight, and I can't turn away from people in need. It felt pretty good to say, to be honest.

She expressed more doubt a little bit after that, and I told her that she'd get there eventually, and that I was sure she'd be able to do anything she wanted if she wanted it enough. More good advice that I should be following myself. Well, I used to follow it anyway. It's been harder lately, but I need to pick myself and brush myself off. I need to stop letting Eve, and Lyra, and Warren, and all those other people who I thought I could count on get me down. I have bigger things in front of me than that. Better things. They've let go and it's time for me to do the same.

That's all I have for now. It's crazy how much better you make me feel. Thanks for listening.

[andrea-jackson-blog1]

Hi, Mom.

I guess now that I start to write, I don't really know what to say to you. "What's up"? "How's it going"? "How've you been since you left"? None of that really seems appropriate. I don't even know whether you're still alive somewhere, or if you're looking down on me from some place with the Twelve. Or if you're even doing that. Guess only they know at this point.

But I have this journal now. Felicity said it would be good for me to "have a benchmark for everything I do". To be honest, I don't even know what I'd write. Or why. All this just seems kind of weird. It's not like anyone else besides myself will ever be reading it. That's how these things work, right? I write and write, and it all just stays locked away forever. It's a good thing I learned how to read and write from Daddy, or this whole thing would be kind of pointless. Not that I really get the point anyway, but if Felicity says it will help, then I suppose I just have to take her word for it.

What an... interesting ride it's been with her. She came out of nowhere, but I feel "tangled up" with her almost. Not entirely in a bad sense, but it's kind of like I'm stuck in a saddle of a chocobo that doesn't want to obey. On one hand, it's nice to have someone that's able to teach me--we're the same age, but somehow she seems like she's so much older than me. Like she's been through so much more. So she's been trying to teach me stuff about life, too. Not just about the axe. Or trying anyway.

On the other hand, half most of the time, she's bullying me. Teasing me. Intentionally trying to work me up and embarrass me. It's absolutely frustrating. My mind shuts down, my whole body is tense, I feel like I'll catch fire. I hate feeling like that. She says it's to try and "toughen me up" and "thicken my skin" but every single time it's always the same.

Then, after I told her that I never knew you, she says I can be Anna's big sister--which translated into her acting as my mom as well. I still can't get over how weird that thought is. We're the same age, but she, someone I still barely know, wants to treat me like a daughter? I heard that being a parent changes you in more ways than you know, but I never thought something like that would ever be one of the ways someone would change.

But then I stop and think of Eve. I think of the conversation we had in Limsa, when she told me that Silleth (or however you spell her name, I have no idea) saw Eve as her mother. She seems used to that thought now, and if this is kind of how she felt when she told me how strange it felt to her, then maybe I'm overthinking it too much? I do have to admit, it would be kind of nice, finally knowing what having a mother would be like. I still stop and wonder from time to time how much different I'd be if you never left, and taught me everything you knew.

So I think that's why I'm going to let go. I'm going to try embracing this idea. It might be good for me--for the both of us--and it honestly wouldn't hurt feeling like I matter to someone again. Whatever happens, at least I can say I didn't back down or run away.

I don't have much else to talk about right now. I saw Felicity's axe--she said it was magic, that it burned really hot when she used it, which got me thinking. I have trouble with aether. I can't use it, and I can barely even use the aethernet where so many other people have absolutely no trouble with it. So... What if something like what Felicity has was the answer to my problems? Some sort of "focus", as she put it, that I could use somehow to use aether? It's an idea, for now, but I don't even know where I'd get something like that, or how I'd use it. I'll need to ask around, see if any of the people I'm acquainted with have any ideas, or if any of them might be able to help me figure out how to make use of something like that.

Actually, now that I've gotten all that written down, it feels kind of nice. It's like sharing my thoughts with someone any time I need to, without feeling like I'm burdening them with my problems, or feeling like I'm trying to get some sort of answer out of them. It's almost relaxing in a way. I might actually do this again, when I have more to write about.

Bye, Mom. Thanks for listening.

[everianne-ff14-blog]

Everianne

Character Meme (FFXIV)

Tagged by: @andrea-jackson

Full Name: Everianne Leroux

Gender and Sexuality: Female; Asexual

Pronouns: She/Her

Ethnicity/Species: Wildwood Elezen

Birthplace and Birthdate: Dravanian Highlands, 10th Sun of the 3rd Umbral Moon

Guilty Pleasures: Tattoos, White Chocolate

Phobias: Autophobia,  Dishabiliophobia

What They Would Be Famous For: Eve might one day grow famous for performing a medical miracle of some sort. She has a small reputation already for being something of a walking Calm Amidst the Storm, though it’s unlikely that she will grow beyond this.

What Have They / Would They Gotten Arrested For: Eve has managed to avoid being on the wrong end of judicial power, but there are more than a few in her homeland that would happily see her incarcerated or executed for religious reasons.

OC You Ship Them With: Nobody. One day this might change, but as she stands now, I can’t see her ending up with anyone. It would take a severe shift in character, and most likely a compassionate elezen male, for her to find a mate. Eve avoids relationships, though she has caught the eye of Andrea Jackson and temporarily Steffen Clauseaux. The first has been very determined with her advances.

OC Most Likely To Murder Them: That’s confidential information, right there.

Favorite Book Genre: Mystery, and tales of heroism.

Least Favorite Book Cliche: Mary Sues. She has never met a perfect person.

Talents and/or Powers: Eve is a prodigal medical practitioner. She has devoted nearly her entire conscious life to it, both as a medic and a wielder of Aether. She has a surgeon’s precision, and she does not balk at even the most grievous of wounds.

Why Someone Might Love Them: Eve lives to support those around her. She defies the typical, and well-deserved, stereotype of Ishgardians who are arrogant, self-absorbed, and xenophobic. She seems to have no shortage of patience, and always has a warm smile and a kind word on hand. She somehow manages to emanate warmth and compassion no matter what scenario she finds herself in.

Why Someone Might Hate Them: Eve doesn’t tend to keep good company. Murderers, thieves, whores, and a certain Miqo’te with fleas. If guilty-by-association is a thing, Eve could very well be the next Gaius von Baelsar. As she is now, Eve has the sort of personality that some people absolutely can’t stand, and some have outright called her a waste of time and air.

How They Change: From a young girl, raised in a Convent, with dreams of serving the pantheon in whatever way the Weaver set out for her, Eve never would have foreseen herself as she is now. The surrogate mother to a Hyur girl not even a decade younger than her, spiritual and emotional adviser to nearly two dozen souls wandering through life without any readily apparent guidance... Eve allows herself no romance, and she refuses to harm another. The day either of those things change... Will truly be something.

Why You Love Them:  I love Eve because she’s my favorite kind of character. She doesn’t have anything to prove to anyone, seeking only to improve those around her. She isn’t heroic or even particularly badass, and hers is not a story of legends or fables... But I love watching her make other characters smile, and give them enough hope to keep on keeping on.

Tags:​ @fhawnmillahn

[stormiejewelry]

The Whirling Girlish covered my work recently featured in Numero Homme Magazine with Model Nyima Ward, Photographed by Alexei Hay and Styled by Bill Mullen thanks to my representatives at Roseark!

The Whirling Girlish covered my work recently featured in Numero Homme Magazine with Model Nyima Ward, Photographed by Alexei Hay and Styled by Bill Mullen thanks to my representatives at Roseark!

Original article here: http://thewhirlinggirlish.com/2015/10/07/she-wishes-she-was-that-belt-pss-she-made-that-belt-and-nyima-ward-is-wearing-it-pss-i-live-with-her/

The Whirling Girlish is a feminist-minded/all inclusive portal for individuals in the digital community that dig the arts, culture, and media. The Whirling Girlish works in film production and resides in Los Angeles, California. 

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[lifeislikeawavewhorisesupanddown]

The Big C Stagione 4 Hereafter (2013)

The Big C Stagione 4 Hereafter (2013)

Sono le cose di tutti i giorni che mi portano avanti. –Cathy, 4.01

Spero che le mie parole di oggi servano a ricordarvi di dare sempre il meglio di voi stessi. Trovate qualche che amate fare, non prendete la strada più facile. –Cathy All’Altoparlante, 4.01

La vita è troppo breve per avere strane regole sul cibo. –Cathy All’Altoparlante, 4.01

Non perdere mai il tuo senso dell’umorismo. –Cathy, 4.01

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